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13 Conflict Resolution and Problem Solving

Chapter 13 Check-in:

  • Identify Conflict Causes and Effects
  • Explore Conflict Approaches Solutions
  • Basic Problem Solving Strategy PDCA

Like all communication, good conflict management and resolution requires your time: listen, reflect, and consider all elements of a situation and the people involved.  It is not a simple process and there are some steps to help you navigate the process.  In the end, it is about the relationship.

Frequently considered a negative, conflict can actually be an opportunity for growth in relationship or work.  Your attitude towards the situation and person plays a role in any outcome.  Adam Grant, Professor of Psychology at The Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania and Saul P. Steinberg Professor of Management, notes that “The absence of conflict is not harmony, it’s apathy.  If you are in a group where people never disagree, the only way that could ever really happen is if the people don’t care enough to speak their minds.” (Grant, February 2021).

However, it is easy to feel at a loss in an immediate conflict situation.  Here are some brief points to consider when faced with more than just a disagreement.

Conflict is emotional: it is much greater than a difference of opinions.  It is usually an expression of not being heard, seen, valued or respected.   It is based on a deeply person need and emotional response, based on perceptions which have identified a threat in any form.  If conflict is ignored, it can fester and result in such entrenched opinions and sides that resolution appears impossible (Segal et al, 2020).

The first step is to determine what the actual problem is as perceived by all parties.  The Conflict Tree analogy is especially useful if you respond well to visuals (O’Connor, 2020).  It is an excellent activity for a group or individual to clarify the effects (branches), core problems (trunk), and even causes of the issue (roots).

Once the actual problem is identified, you can move on to tackling a resolution together.

Approaches to Conflict

There are generally five styles for approaching conflict (Benoliel, 2017) and understanding what they are and what style you lean towards, identifies how you will move through the process.  These categories are determined by whether the focus is on the relationship or the end goal of a task/project.  While these may be more specific to workplace conflicts, they certainly identify personal conflict responses as well.

Collaboration is marked by a balanced focus on the relationship with others and meeting long-term objectives.  A Competition style is marked by individuals who are assertive and probably uncooperative who demonstrate that their priority is the outcome of the project more than the relationships.  Although few people enjoy conflict, the Avoidance style focuses on the the immediate unpleasantness and therefore avoids the issues.  This traditionally marks individuals who are unassertive and uncooperative largely because they assume it is safer to ignore than face an issue.  Sometimes there are individuals who will do anything to please others: this Accommodation approach results in self-sacrifice and is usually the route taken by those who care more about the relationship than the outcome.  Unfortunately, they are frequently taken advantage of in their efforts to please others.  Lastly, there are those who prefer the Compromise strategy. This may seem expedient in the attempt to resolve the problem by aiming for mutually acceptable terms and concessions, it does frequently leaves no one side satisfied even though it allows most to maintain an assertive and cooperative stance.

Strategies for Solutions

Sometimes those involved in conflict turn to an third person for assistance to resolve a conflict.  A mediator can listen to the perspectives of those in the dispute and focuses on helping each side hear the concerns and priorities of the other.  Working with the individuals in conflict, a mediator aims to help them create a solution acceptable to both sides.  Sometimes the third party is an Arbitrator whose role is to hear each side and provide a decision to resolve the dispute.  In some cases the conflict results in the even more formal process of a trial.

There are four key skills you need to approach conflict resolution with or without a third party involved (Segal et al, 2020; Fighting Fair, n.d.).

Conflict can be a very stressful experience and your Stress Management is an essential first step.  When we are stressed, we can’t think clearly, we can’t understand someone else’s thoughts or feelings, and it makes communication very difficult.  Use whatever method works best for you to manage your stress.

Once your stress is managed, it is easier to exert Control over your Emotions.  Recognize the emotions you are experiencing to assist in your processing the experience without having a purely emotional response.

With your stress and emotions recognized and managed, it makes it easier to recognize and pay attention to the feelings you and the other people express  and you can Identify Non-Verbal Communication.   Much is said without words and body language is a good indication of how the other person feels towards the situation.

Respect each other is standard for every communication situation and essential to remember if you are in a position of conflict.  Personal attacks, or drawing on personal knowledge, has no productive part in conflict resolution.

Many resources may explain the benefits of humour, but caution should be used.  Sometimes an emotional situation is not the best time for humour as you can unintentionally be seen to diminish the importance another person places on the experience.

Work together to identify the problem by taking the time to see it from multiple perspectives.  Be clear about the desired results and end goal.  Think about the relationships and long term impacts that any course of action may have on all parties.  It takes commitment to resolve a conflict.

Problem Solving

We covered Reflection and Feedback in Chapter 12 and these are essential steps for effective conflict resolution and problem solving. Even the Trial and Error process of problem solving relies on evaluating the success of an action before moving on to another attempt.

Many different approaches to problem solving exist though the basic core approach can be seen across geographic and language borders.  The PDCA approach – Plan, Do, Check, Act – provides the basic four steps process that can be expanded to suit any profession or experience (Plan, Do, Check, Act, 2021).

Problem solving starts with a clear identification of problem.  Then you need to clarify the desired end result.  The development of a plan can be as short or as long as necessary.  Once you have a plan, you have to implement it: Do.  Check is your opportunity to evaluate the success of your plan and make any amendments necessary.  Finally, Act: put your strategy into practice.  An important point to remember is that the reflection and evaluation should be an ongoing part of the solution you implement.

Chapter 13 Check-out:

  • Explore Conflict Approaches and Solutions

Remember your last conflict with another person.  How was it resolved?  How would you like it to have been resolved?  What could you have done to implement that change in result?

How do you usually approach problem solving?  How successful has it been for you? 

What, if anything, would you like to change about how you’ve problem solved in the past?

Resources and References

Benoliel, B. (2017). Five styles of conflict resolution.  Walden University.  [Online]  https://www.waldenu.edu/news-and-events/walden-news/2017/0530-whats-your-conflict-management-style

Fighting Fair to Resolve Conflict. (n.d.).  Counselling and Mental Health Centre. University of Texas at Austin. [Online] https://cmhc.utexas.edu/fightingfair.html

Goleman, D. (April 2012). Daniel Goleman Introduces Emotional Intelligence .  Big Think. [Online] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y7m9eNoB3NU

Grant, A., (February 2021). The Easiest Person to Fool .  The Hidden Brain. NPR Podcast. [Online] https://hidden-brain.simplecast.com/episodes/the-easiest-person-to-fool-f1hbMrGr

Grant, A., (April 2021). The Science of Productive Conflict . TED Podcast. [Online] https://www.ted.com/podcasts/worklife/the-science-of-productive-conflict-transcript

O’Connor, T., (October 2020). 3 Simple Conflict Analysis Tools That Anyone Can Use. [Online] https://medium.com/p/c30689757a0d

Plan Do Check Act: A Simple Problem Solving Methodology. (2021).  Educational-Business-Articles.com [Online] https://www.educational-business-articles.com/plan-do-check-act/

Segal, J., Robinson, L., and Smith, M. (2020). Conflict Resolution Skills. Helpguide.org. [Online] https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/conflict-resolution-skills.htm

Media Attributions

  • Brain Ponder © Luc Grenier

Copyright © by Wendy Ward is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License , except where otherwise noted.

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5 Strategies for Conflict Resolution in the Workplace

Business leader resolving workplace conflict

  • 07 Sep 2023

Any scenario in which you live, work, and collaborate with others is susceptible to conflict. Because workplaces are made up of employees with different backgrounds, personalities, opinions, and daily lives, discord is bound to occur. To navigate it, it’s crucial to understand why it arises and your options for resolving it.

Common reasons for workplace conflict include:

  • Misunderstandings or poor communication skills
  • Differing opinions, viewpoints, or personalities
  • Biases or stereotypes
  • Variations in learning or processing styles
  • Perceptions of unfairness

Although conflict is common, many don’t feel comfortable handling it—especially with colleagues. As a business leader, you’ll likely clash with other managers and need to help your team work through disputes.

Here’s why conflict resolution is important and five strategies for approaching it.

Access your free e-book today.

Why Is Addressing Workplace Conflict Important?

Pretending conflict doesn’t exist doesn’t make it go away. Ignoring issues can lead to missed deadlines, festering resentment, and unsuccessful initiatives.

Yet, according to coaching and training firm Bravely , 53 percent of employees handle “toxic” situations by avoiding them. Worse still, averting a difficult conversation can cost an organization $7,500 and more than seven workdays.

That adds up quickly: American businesses lose $359 billion yearly due to the impact of unresolved conflict.

As a leader, you have a responsibility to foster healthy conflict resolution and create a safe, productive work environment for employees.

“Some rights, such as the right to safe working conditions or the right against sexual harassment, are fundamental to the employment relationship,” says Harvard Business School Professor Nien-hê Hsieh in the course Leadership, Ethics, and Corporate Accountability . “These rights are things that employees should be entitled to no matter what. They’re often written into the law, but even when they aren’t, they’re central to the ethical treatment of others, which involves respecting the inherent dignity and intrinsic worth of each individual.”

Effectively resolving disputes as they arise benefits your employees’ well-being and your company’s financial health. The first step is learning about five conflict resolution strategies at your disposal.

Related: How to Navigate Difficult Conversations with Employees

While there are several approaches to conflict, some can be more effective than others. The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Model —developed by Dr. Kenneth W. Thomas and Dr. Ralph H. Kilmann—outlines five strategies for conflict resolution:

  • Accommodating
  • Compromising
  • Collaborating

These fall on a graph, with assertiveness on the y-axis and cooperativeness on the x-axis. In the Thomas-Kilmann model, “assertiveness” refers to the extent to which you try to reach your own goal, and “cooperativeness” is the extent to which you try to satisfy the other party’s goal.

Alternatively, you can think of these axis labels as the “importance of my goal” and the “importance of this relationship.” If your assertiveness is high, you aim to achieve your own goal. If your cooperativeness is high, you strive to help the other person reach theirs to maintain the relationship.

Here’s a breakdown of the five strategies and when to use each.

1. Avoiding

Avoiding is a strategy best suited for situations in which the relationship’s importance and goal are both low.

While you’re unlikely to encounter these scenarios at work, they may occur in daily life. For instance, imagine you’re on a public bus and the passenger next to you is loudly playing music. You’ll likely never bump into that person again, and your goal of a pleasant bus ride isn’t extremely pressing. Avoiding conflict by ignoring the music is a valid option.

In workplace conflicts—where your goals are typically important and you care about maintaining a lasting relationship with colleagues—avoidance can be detrimental.

Remember: Some situations require avoiding conflict, but you’re unlikely to encounter them in the workplace.

2. Competing

Competing is another strategy that, while not often suited for workplace conflict, can be useful in some situations.

This conflict style is for scenarios in which you place high importance on your goal and low importance on your relationships with others. It’s high in assertiveness and low in cooperation.

You may choose a competing style in a crisis. For instance, if someone is unconscious and people are arguing about what to do, asserting yourself and taking charge can help the person get medical attention quicker.

You can also use it when standing up for yourself and in instances where you feel unsafe. In those cases, asserting yourself and reaching safety is more critical than your relationships with others.

When using a competing style in situations where your relationships do matter (for instance, with a colleague), you risk impeding trust—along with collaboration, creativity, and productivity.

3. Accommodating

The third conflict resolution strategy is accommodation, in which you acquiesce to the other party’s needs. Use accommodating in instances where the relationship matters more than your goal.

For example, if you pitch an idea for a future project in a meeting, and one of your colleagues says they believe it will have a negative impact, you could resolve the conflict by rescinding your original thought.

This is useful if the other person is angry or hostile or you don’t have a strong opinion on the matter. It immediately deescalates conflict by removing your goal from the equation.

While accommodation has its place within organizational settings, question whether you use it to avoid conflict. If someone disagrees with you, simply acquiescing can snuff out opportunities for innovation and creative problem-solving .

As a leader, notice whether your employees frequently fall back on accommodation. If the setting is safe, encouraging healthy debate can lead to greater collaboration.

Related: How to Create a Culture of Ethics and Accountability in the Workplace

4. Compromising

Compromising is a conflict resolution strategy in which you and the other party willingly forfeit some of your needs to reach an agreement. It’s known as a “lose-lose” strategy, since neither of you achieve your full goal.

This strategy works well when your care for your goal and the relationship are both moderate. You value the relationship, but not so much that you abandon your goal, like in accommodation.

For example, maybe you and a peer express interest in leading an upcoming project. You could compromise by co-leading it or deciding one of you leads this one and the other the next one.

Compromising requires big-picture thinking and swallowing your pride, knowing you won’t get all your needs fulfilled. The benefits are that you and the other party value your relationship and make sacrifices to reach a mutually beneficial resolution.

5. Collaborating

Where compromise is a lose-lose strategy, collaboration is a win-win. In instances of collaboration, your goal and the relationship are equally important, motivating both you and the other party to work together to find an outcome that meets all needs.

An example of a situation where collaboration is necessary is if one of your employees isn’t performing well in their role—to the point that they’re negatively impacting the business. While maintaining a strong, positive relationship is important, so is finding a solution to their poor performance. Framing the conflict as a collaboration can open doors to help each other discover its cause and what you can do to improve performance and the business’s health.

Collaboration is ideal for most workplace conflicts. Goals are important, but so is maintaining positive relationships with co-workers. Promote collaboration whenever possible to find creative solutions to problems . If you can’t generate a win-win idea, you can always fall back on compromise.

How to Become a More Effective Leader | Access Your Free E-Book | Download Now

Considering Your Responsibilities as a Leader

As a leader, not only must you address your own conflicts but help your employees work through theirs. When doing so, remember your responsibilities to your employees—whether ethical, legal, or economic.

Leadership, Ethics, and Corporate Accountability groups your ethical responsibilities to employees into five categories:

  • Well-being: What’s ultimately good for the person
  • Rights: Entitlement to receive certain treatment
  • Duties: A moral obligation to behave in a specific way
  • Best practices: Aspirational standards not required by law or cultural norms
  • Fairness: Impartial and just treatment

In the course, Hsieh outlines three types of fairness you can use when helping employees solve conflicts:

  • Legitimate expectations: Employees reasonably expect certain practices or behaviors to continue based on experiences with the organization and explicit promises.
  • Procedural fairness: Managers must resolve issues impartially and consistently.
  • Distributive fairness: Your company equitably allocates opportunities, benefits, and burdens.

Particularly with procedural fairness, ensure you don’t take sides when mediating conflict. Treat both parties equally, allowing them time to speak and share their perspectives. Guide your team toward collaboration or compromise, and work toward a solution that achieves the goal while maintaining—and even strengthening—relationships.

Are you interested in learning how to navigate difficult decisions as a leader? Explore Leadership, Ethics, and Corporate Accountability —one of our online leadership and management courses —and download our free guide to becoming a more effective leader.

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Conflict Resolution

8 ways to resolve conflict in the workplace.

By the Mind Tools Content Team

Where there are people, there is conflict. We each have our values, needs and habits, so it's easy to misunderstand or irritate one another – or worse, to fall into conflict.

Left unchecked, conflict can lead to bad decisions and outright disputes, bullying or harassment. Teamwork breaks down, morale drops, and projects grind to a halt. Organizations feel the hit with wasted talent, high absenteeism, and increased staff turnover.

But conflict can be resolved. What's more, it can bring issues to light, strengthen relationships, and spark innovation – so long as you don't try to ignore it!

In this article, we'll explore different types of conflict, what causes conflict, and how to reach a positive outcome when you find yourself in conflict with a co-worker. (To identify the signs of conflict occurring between other people and to help them overcome their conflict with one another, we recommend our follow-on article, Resolving Team Conflict .)

Conflict Resolution Definition

Generally, workplace conflicts fall into two categories:

  • Personality conflict or disagreements between individuals. These clashes are driven and perpetuated by emotions such as anger, stress and frustration.
  • Substantive conflict is tangible and task-related, like the decisions leaders make, the performance of a team member, or your company's direction.

If unaddressed, both can spiral into wider conflict between teams, departments or businesses. Conflict resolution can be defined as the process of identifying, addressing, and resolving disagreements or disputes among employees in a professional setting, thereby fostering a positive and productive work environment.

What Causes Conflict at Work?

Some of the most common causes of workplace conflict are:

  • Unclear responsibilities . Some team members may feel they do more work than others, or resent those who seem to have fewer responsibilities. Blame and frustration can build due to duplicated work or unfinished tasks.
  • Competition for resources . Time, money, materials, equipment, and skillsets are finite resources. Competition for them can lead to conflict.
  • Different interests . People may focus on personal or departmental goals over organizational ones. Or be held up and frustrated by others who they rely on to do their jobs effectively.

Read our article on Bell and Hart's Eight Causes of Conflict for more sources of – and solutions to – disputes.

Five Conflict Resolution Strategies

When you find yourself in a conflict situation, these five strategies will help you to resolve disagreements quickly and effectively:

1. Raise the Issue Early

Keeping quiet only lets resentment fester. Equally, speaking with other people first can fuel rumor and misunderstanding.

So, whether you're battling over the thermostat or feel that you're being micromanaged, be direct and talk with the other party. However, if you're afraid of making that approach, or worry that it may make the problem worse, speak with your manager first, or your HR department if the other party is your manager.

Either way, be assertive (not aggressive) and speak openly. This will encourage others to do the same – and you can get to the root cause of a problem before it escalates.

2. Manage Your Emotions

Choose your timing when you talk to someone about the conflict. If you're angry, you may say something you'll regret and inflame the situation. Be careful to avoid playing the blame game .

So stay calm, collect yourself, and ask, "What is it I want to achieve here?", "What are the issues I'm having?" and "What is it that I would like to see?"

See our article Managing Your Emotions at Work for more insight and tips.

3. Show Empathy

When you talk to someone about a conflict, it's natural to want to state your own case, rather than hear out the other side. But when two people do this, the conversation goes in circles.

Instead, invite the other party to describe their position, ask how they think they might resolve the issue, and listen with empathy .

Putting yourself in the other person's shoes is an essential part of negotiation. This helps you to build mutual respect and understanding – and to achieve an outcome that satisfies both parties.

4. Practice Active Listening

To identify the source of the conflict you have to really listen. To listen actively:

  • Paraphrase the other party's points to show you're listening and really understand them.
  • Look out for non-verbal signals that contradict what they are saying, such as a hesitant tone behind positive words. Bring these out into the open sensitively to address them together.
  • Use appropriate body language , such as nodding your head, to show interest and to make it clear that you're following them.

Go further with Empathic Listening or Mindful Listening .

5. Acknowledge Criticism

Some of the things the other person tells you may be difficult to hear. But remember that criticism or constructive feedback is about job behaviors and not you as a person.

So, keep an open mind and use criticism to help you to identify areas to improve, perform better next time, and grow.

Glasers' Three-Step Strategy for Conflict Resolution

Conflict management consultants Peter and Susan Glaser recommend a three-step strategy for resolving conflict, and it draws on many of the skills we've looked at above. You can hear the Glasers talking about their model in our exclusive interview with them. [1]

The steps for these conflict resolution skills are:

  • Prove that you understand their side.
  • Acknowledge that you are part of the problem.
  • Try again if the conversation didn't go well.

Let's try a training exercise and apply each step to a fictional conflict resolution scenario.

Conflict Resolution Training Example

Imagine that the heads of two departments are in conflict. Product Manager Sayid changed the price of a product without letting Marketing Manager Gayanne know. As a result, the marketing team sent out an email to customers with incorrect prices. They had to send out a follow-up email apologizing for the error, and make good on the price some customers paid for the product.

1. Prove That You Understand Their Side

Instead of blaming Sayid, Gayanne asks him how he came to make the decision. She uses her questioning and listening skills to get the information she needs and to show that she's truly hearing Sayid's response.

She discovers that Sayid was pressured by a major client to drop the price or risk losing a contract. She empathizes , saying, "Yes, I've had difficulties with that client before, too."

As Susan Glaser says, "Only when you believe that I understand you, will you be willing to try to understand my perspective." [2]

2. Acknowledge That You Are Part of the Problem

If you're in conflict with someone, it's unlikely you're free of all blame. So admit your part in it. This leads to mutual trust, a better understanding of one another, and makes it easier to find a solution.

In our scenario, Gayanne could say to Sayid, "I should have shared our marketing strategy and email send dates with you. I'll do that right away."

3. Try Again if the Conversation Doesn't Go Well

Despite the progress they've made, relations between the two managers remain frosty, so Sayid calls Gayanne the following week. He says, "I was thinking about our conversation, and I'd like to try again because I'm not happy with how it went. I've had time to take your points on board, and I'd like to talk about how we can work together better going forward."

Remember that you get more than one shot at resolving a conflict. Susan Glaser says, "There's a myth that if we have a bad conversation with someone it's over. In fact, 'do overs' are powerful." [3]

Frequently Asked Questions

Why is conflict resolution important in the workplace?

Unresolved conflicts can hinder productivity and damage team dynamics. Effective conflict resolution helps maintain a positive work environment, promotes collaboration, and ensures issues are addressed before they escalate.

What are some common sources of workplace conflicts?

Workplace conflicts can arise from differences in communication styles, conflicting goals, personality clashes, misunderstandings, resource allocation, or competing priorities. Recognizing these sources is crucial for timely intervention.

How can a team manager effectively address conflicts among team members?

A team manager should act as a mediator and facilitator. Begin by listening to both sides, understanding perspectives, and acknowledging emotions. Encourage open dialogue, find common ground, and work together to find a solution that is fair and beneficial for all parties.

What strategies can managers employ to prevent conflicts from escalating?

Managers can implement proactive measures such as fostering a transparent communication culture, setting clear expectations, defining roles and responsibilities, and promoting team-building activities. By addressing potential sources of conflict early on, managers can prevent minor issues from turning into major disputes.

How does effective conflict resolution contribute to team productivity?

Resolving conflicts promptly maintains a harmonious working environment where team members feel valued and understood. This leads to improved morale, increased focus on tasks, and a more efficient workflow, ultimately enhancing overall team productivity.

When is it appropriate to involve higher management in conflict resolution?

Involving higher management should be considered when conflicts cannot be resolved at the team level or when the conflicts involve larger organizational issues. Higher management can provide a neutral perspective and additional resources to facilitate resolution.

Conflict is common in the workplace. The biggest mistake you can make is to do nothing. Unresolved tensions can affect the health and performance of people and organizations.

So, hone these five conflict resolution skills to pre-empt, manage and fix conflicts with your co-workers:

  • Raise the issue early.
  • Manage your emotions.
  • Show empathy.
  • Practice active listening.
  • Acknowledge criticism.

Then try the Glasers' three-step conflict resolution strategy to resolve issues together:

  • Try again if the conversation doesn't go well.

In the process, you may even discover positives such as improved processes, strengthened relationships, and innovation!

[1] [2] [3] Mind Tools interview with Peter A. Glaser, Ph.D. and Susan R. Glaser. Available here .

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Managing Conflict Resolution Effectively

How to set boundaries and act assertively in conflict..

Posted January 11, 2024 | Reviewed by Jessica Schrader

  • Assertiveness and boundaries are a powerful combination for managing conflict.
  • When you are being nonjudgmental and cultivating compassion, collaboration increases.
  • Practice active listening to understand your partner while finding common ground.

Source: Moshe Ratson

Conflict resolution is a way for two or more parties to find a peaceful solution to a disagreement among them. When a dispute arises, often the best course of action is assertive communication that resolves the disagreement while maintaining a respectful relationship.

When conflicts are managed constructively, it can help build trust in relationships. Respectfully, directly, and openly discussing opposing perspectives and resolving conflicts collaboratively can create a sense of unity, shared purpose, and mutual respect within the relationship.

Assertiveness and boundaries are essential skills for managing conflict in any situation. Whether it is at work, in your relationships, or in your team, you need to be able to express your feelings, thoughts, needs, and opinions respectfully and confidently.

What is assertive communication?

Assertive communication is a style of communication based on honesty, respect, and confidence . Assertiveness is the ability to express feelings and thoughts openly and to directly defend your rights while respecting the rights of others. It is about taking care of your own needs and wants while considering the needs and wants of others. It is the ability to take responsibility without being controlling. Assertiveness is the balanced space between surrender and aggressiveness. It is not about overpowering or dominating, but rather about finding balance, harmony, and mutual understanding.

Why is assertive communication important for dealing with conflict?

Assertive communication is an essential skill for conflict resolution, as it enables you to express your needs in a respectful manner while also collaboratively resolving your disagreement with your partner. Assertiveness helps build trust and rapport with your partner, empowering your partner while enhancing your self-esteem and confidence. In addition, assertive communication minimizes stress , while ensuring your rights and boundaries are respected.

Assertive communication is important because it ensures that you deliver your points in a constructive way—respectful, clear, direct, and kind. When you communicate in that manner, it will naturally help diffuse the conflict, establish healthy boundaries, and also prevent any issue from escalating.

What are boundaries?

Boundaries are the limits and rules you set for yourself and others in your interactions. They reflect your values, preferences, and expectations and help you define what is acceptable or unacceptable for you. Boundaries help individuals establish limits and protect their emotional and physical well-being. Without boundaries, individuals may not feel safe or secure in their relationships or environments.

Set healthy boundaries

Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries with others is a skill you can learn and practice. To do so, identify your boundaries—what you want and need, what makes you feel comfortable and uncomfortable, and your non-negotiables. Then communicate them clearly, directly, and respectfully to others. Be consistent and firm, but also flexible and open to feedback. If someone crosses or violates your boundaries, let them know how you feel and what you expect. Take action to protect yourself if they persist or disrespect your boundaries. Lastly, respect the boundaries of others. Ask for permission, listen to their cues, and accept their “no” without judgment, pressure, or manipulation.

Integrate assertiveness and boundaries to resolve conflict

Handling conflict with boundaries and assertiveness is not always easy, but it is achievable and beneficial. To do so, identify your state of mind, feelings, and needs, and prepare your statements. Choose an appropriate time and location to have a discussion about the conflict and make sure that both parties are ready and willing to converse. During the talk, objectively focus on the issue rather than the person. Avoid personal attacks, put down, or allegations, and use “I” statements to express your perspective. Stay calm and listen with curiosity to understand your partner while finding common ground. Respect both of your boundaries and rights while being willing to compromise and negotiate. Stay open-minded and make sure you maintain a caring relationship with your partner regardless of conflict and its outcome. Finally, thank the other person for their time and effort, summarizing what you agreed upon, expressing appreciation, and hoping for a stronger relationship and a bright future.

Practice active listening

To identify the source of the conflict, you have to pay attention and listen carefully. To listen actively, make sure you understand your partner and paraphrase the other party's points.

Pay attention to nonverbal signals and use appropriate body language , such as nodding your head, to show interest and to clarify that you're following them.

Listen without interruption to what the other person has to say. Aspire to be objective and clear. Then, ask questions to make sure each side understands what the other person thinks, feels, and wants.

Do that before speaking

Before you communicate, ask yourself the following questions about what you wish to say:

conflict resolution and problem solving

  • Is it true?
  • Is it kind?
  • Is it useful?
  • Is it necessary?
  • Is it going to land well?
  • Is this the right time to say it?

If one of the answers is no, consider not saying it. In these moments, silence is more productive than words. Be patient and once you find the time when the answers to these questions are yes, this is the time to speak.

7 steps for better conflict resolution

  • Define the source of the conflict. Take your time to reveal the true needs of each party. The greater knowledge you have about the cause of the problem, the more easily you can resolve it.
  • Find a common goal. Make similarities the starting point of finding a creative solution. Be open and curious to continually find common ground throughout the entire conflict resolution process.
  • Establish safety. Creative conflict resolution requires that all parties feel safe enough to not only share what they need but to challenge each other's ideas without emotional escalation.
  • Recognize your part. Be accountable and objectively assess your share in the conflict. Acknowledge your role in the problem and take responsibility for it.
  • Empathize with your partner. Demonstrate to your partner that you understand their side while considering it. When you are being non-judgmental and cultivate compassion the fear of losing diminishes and collaboration increases.
  • Review options. Remind yourself of your positive intention and what you want to achieve before you start the discussion. Be creative and discuss possible options while looking for solutions that benefit all parties.
  • Discover a win-win solution. This is the ultimate goal—to agree on an option that benefits both sides to some extent. When one party wins and another party loses, the outcome does not resolve the underlying causes of the conflict.

Conflicts and disagreements are unavoidable. It is important to realize that the benefits of conflict resolution extend beyond resolving disagreements, contributing significantly to personal growth, emotional well-being, and healthy relationships.

Moshe Ratson MBA, MFT

Moshe Ratson, MBA, MFT, is a psychotherapist and executive coach in NYC. He specializes in personal and professional development, anger management, emotional intelligence, infidelity issues, and couples and marriage therapy.

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5 Conflict Resolution Strategies

Use these proven conflict resolution strategies in your conflict management efforts..

By Katie Shonk — on May 16th, 2024 / Conflict Resolution

conflict resolution and problem solving

Whether a conflict erupts at work or at home, we frequently fall back on the tendency to try to correct the other person or group’s perceptions, lecturing them about why we’re right—and they’re wrong. Deep down, we know that this conflict resolution approach usually fails to resolve the conflict and often only makes it worse.

Here are 5 conflict resolution strategies that are more effective, drawn from research on negotiation and conflicts, to try out the next time you’re tempted to argue your point.

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  • Conflict resolution strategy #1: Recognize that all of us have biased fairness perceptions. Both parties to a conflict typically think they’re right (and the other side is wrong) because they quite literally can’t get out of our own heads. Our sense of what would constitute a fair conflict resolution is biased by egocentrism , or the tendency to have difficulty seeing a situation from another person’s perspective, research by Carnegie Mellon University professors Linda Babcock and George Loewenstein and their colleagues’ shows. When embroiled in a conflict, we need to try to overcome our self-centered fairness perceptions. We might do this by jointly hiring a mediator who can help us see one another’s point of view, or by enlisting another type of unbiased expert, such as an appraiser, to offer their view of the “facts.”
  • Conflict resolution strategy #2: Avoid escalating tensions with threats and provocative moves. When we feel we’re being ignored or steamrolled, we often try to capture the other party’s attention by making a threat, such as saying we’ll take a dispute to court or try to ruin the other party’s business reputation. There’s a time and place for litigation, but threats and other attention-getting moves, such as take-it-or-leave-it offers, are often a mistake. Because of the common human tendency to treat others the way they’re treated, people tend to respond to threats in kind, leading to an escalatory spiral and worsening conflict. Before making a threat, be sure you have exhausted all other options for managing conflict.
  • Conflict resolution strategy #3: Overcome an “us versus them” mentality. Group connections build loyalty and strong relationships, but they can also promote suspicion and hostility toward members of out-groups. As a result, groups in conflict tend to have an inaccurate understanding of each other’s views and to see the other’s positions as more extreme than they actually are. Whether dealing with conflict as a group or on your own, you can overcome the tendency to demonize the other side by looking for an identity or goal you share. Begin your conflict management efforts by highlighting your common goal of reaching a fair and sustainable agreement. Try to identify and discuss points of similarity between you, such as growing up in the same region. The more points of connection you can identify, the more collaborative and productive your conflict resolution process is likely to be.
  • Conflict resolution strategy #4: Look beneath the surface to identify deeper issues. Our deepest disputes often seem to involve money: labor disputes over employee wages, family conflicts over assets, for example. Because money is a finite resource, these conflicts tend to be single-issue battles in which one party’s gain will inevitably be the other party’s loss. But disputes over money often involve much deeper causes of conflict , such as the feeling that one is being disrespected or overlooked. The next time you find yourself arguing over the division of funds, suggest putting that conversation on hold. Then take time to explore each other’s deeper concerns. Listen closely to one another’s grievances, and try to come up with creative ways to address them. This conflict management strategy is likely to strengthen the relationship and add new interests to the table, expanding the pie of value to be divided in the process.
  • Conflict resolution strategy #5: Separate sacred from pseudo-sacred issues. Conflict management can be particularly intractable when core values that negotiators believe are sacred, or nonnegotiable, are involved, such as their family bonds, religious beliefs, political views, or personal moral code. Take the case of two siblings who disagree about whether to sell their deceased parents’ farm, with one of them insisting the land must remain in the family and the other arguing that the parents would want them to sell it. We tend to err on the side of not negotiating when sacred principles and values are at stake, writes Program on Negotiation Chair Robert Mnookin in his book Bargaining with the Devil: When to Negotiate, When to Fight. But many of the issues negotiators consider sacred are actually pseudo-sacred , notes Harvard Business School professor Max H. Bazerman—that is, the issues are only off-limits under certain conditions. So it’s important to thoroughly analyze the benefits you might expect from a negotiation that could allow you to honor your principles. For example, the sibling’s objections to selling the family land might soften if a percentage of the proceeds are donated to the parents’ favorite charity.

How do you deal with conflict? Do you use any of these strategies?

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No Responses to “5 Conflict Resolution Strategies”

6 responses to “5 conflict resolution strategies”.

Useful tips. I really like 1 and 3, finding similarities really help to build a stronger relationship between two people.

Great advice! I especially like 1 and 3 above for their simplicity and broad applicability to different types of disputes.

Conflict resolution is quickly becoming a passionate subject for me. Nice article.

Conflict is just as literal as it is named. Thanks for this great article!

Great points. Love reading and learning this content

The power of listening the other party can make negotiating easy and gave trust to deal with,interest of every one should be clerarly defined about the goal and the issue of negotiation.

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Article contents

Conflict management.

  • Patricia Elgoibar , Patricia Elgoibar University of Barcelona
  • Martin Euwema Martin Euwema Katholieke Universiteit Leuven
  •  and  Lourdes Munduate Lourdes Munduate University of Seville
  • https://doi.org/10.1093/acrefore/9780190236557.013.5
  • Published online: 28 June 2017

Conflicts are part of nature and certainly part of human relations, between individuals, as well as within and between groups. Conflicts occur in every domain of life: family, work, and society, local and global. Conflict management, therefore, is an essential competency for each person. People differ largely in their emotional and behavioral responses to conflict and need to learn how to behave effectively in different conflict situations. This requires a contingency approach, first assessing the conflict situation, and then choosing a strategy, matching the goals of the party. In most situations, fostering cooperative relations will be most beneficial; however, this is also most challenging. Therefore, constructive conflict management strategies, including trust building and methods of constructive controversy, are emphasized. Conflict management, however, is broader than the interaction of the conflicting parties. Third-party interventions are an essential element of constructive conflict management, particularly the assessment of which parties are intervening in what ways at what escalation stage.

  • cooperation
  • competition
  • conflict behavior
  • conglomerate conflict behavior
  • constructive conflict management
  • conflict resolution strategies

Definition of Conflict

Conflicts are part of nature, and certainly part of human relations. People experience conflict with other persons, in teams or in groups, as well as between larger entities, departments, organizations, communities, and countries. Conflicts appear at home, at work, and in our spare-time activities with friends, with people we love and with people we hate, as well as with our superiors and with our subordinates and coworkers. Parties need to accept conflicts as part of life dynamics and learn to deal with them effectively and efficiently. Conflict management refers to the way we manage incompatible actions with others, where others can be a person or a group.

Conflict is a component of interpersonal interactions; it is neither inevitable nor intrinsically bad, but it is commonplace (Coleman, Deutsch, & Marcus, 2014 ; Schellenberg, 1996 ). In the 20th century , Lewin ( 1935 ) concluded that an intrinsic state of tension motivates group members to move toward the accomplishment of their desired common goals. Later on, Parker Follett ( 1941 ) explored the constructive side of conflict and defined conflict as the appearance of difference, difference of opinions or difference of interests. Deutsch ( 1949 ) developed this line of thought and analyzed the relation between the way group members believe their goals are related and their interactions and relationships.

A common definition of conflict argues that there is a conflict between two (or more) parties (individuals or groups) if at least one of them is offended, or feels bothered by the other (Van de Vliert, 1997 ; Wall & Callister, 1995 ). Traditionally, conflict has been defined as opposing interests involving scarce resources and goal divergence and frustration (Pondy, 1967 ). However, Deutsch ( 1973 ) defined conflict as incompatible activities: one person's actions interfere, obstruct, or in some way get in the way of another's action. Tjosvold, Wan, and Tang ( 2016 ) proposed that defining conflict as incompatible actions is a much stronger foundation than defining conflict as opposing interests, because conflicts also can occur when people have common goals (i.e., they may disagree about the best means to achieve their common goals). The key contribution of Deutsch’s ( 1973 ) proposal is that incompatible activities occur in both compatible and incompatible goal contexts. Whether the protagonists believe their goals are cooperative or competitive very much affects their expectations, interaction, and outcomes as they approach conflict (Tjosvold et al., 2016 ).

Characteristics of Conflict

Euwema and Giebels ( 2017 ) highlighted some key elements of conflict.

Conflict implies dependence and interdependence. Parties rely to some extent on the other parties to realize their goals (Kaufman, Elgoibar, & Borbely, 2016 ). This interdependence can be positive (a cooperative context), negative (a competitive context), or mixed. Positive interdependence is strongly related to cooperative conflict behaviors, while negative interdependence triggers competitive behaviors (Johnson & Johnson, 2005 ). Interdependence also reflects the power difference between parties. A short-term contractor on a low-paid job usually is much more dependent on the employer than vice versa. Many conflicts, however, can be seen as “mixed motive” situations.

Conflicts are mostly mixed motive situations because parties have simultaneous motives to cooperate and motives to compete. Parties are, on the one hand, dependent on each other to realize their goal, and, on the other hand, they are at the same time competitors. For example, two colleagues on a team are cooperating for the same team result; however, there is competition for the role as project leader. In a soccer team, the players have a team goal of working together to win, but they can be competing to be the top scorer. The mixed motive structure is very important to understand conflict dynamics. When conflicts arise, the competitive aspects become more salient, and the cooperative structure often is perceived less by parties. Interventions to solve conflict, therefore, are often related to these perceptions and the underlying structures.

Conflict is a psychological experience. Conflict is by definition a personal and subjective experience, as each individual can perceive and manage the same conflict in a different manner. Conflict doesn’t necessarily have an objective basis (Van de Vliert, 1997 ). It depends on the perception of the specific situation, and the perception is by definition subjective and personal.

Conflict concerns cognitive and affective tension. When someone perceives blocked goals and disagreements, he or she can also, although not necessarily, feel fear or anger. Many authors consider that conflict is emotionally charged (Nair, 2007 ; Pondy, 1967 ; Sinaceur, Adam, Van Kleef, & Galinky, 2013 ), although the emotion doesn’t need to be labeled necessarily as a negative emotion. Some people actually enjoy conflict. Emotional experiences in conflict are also scripted by cultural, historical, and personal influences (Lindner, 2014 ).

Conflict can be unidirectional. One party can feel frustrated or thwarted by the other while the second party is hardly aware of, and doesn’t perceive the same reality of, the conflict.

Conflict is a process. Conflict is a dynamic process that does not appear suddenly, but takes some time to develop and passes through several stages (Spaho, 2013 ). Conflict is the process resulting from the tension in interpersonal interactions or between team members because of real or perceived differences (De Dreu & Weingart, 2003 ; Thomas, 1992 ; Wall & Callister, 1995 ).

Type of Conflict: Task, Process, and Relationship Conflict

Early conflict and organizational research concluded that conflict interferes with team performance and reduces satisfaction due to an increase in tension and distraction from the objective (Brown, 1983 ; Hackman & Morris, 1975 ; Pondy, 1967 ; Wall & Callister, 1995 ). Jehn ( 1995 ) differentiated between task and relational conflict, and later also included process conflict (De Wit, Greer, & Jehn, 2012 ). Task conflict refers to different opinions on content (Jehn & Mannix, 2001 ). Examples of task conflict are conflict about distribution of resources, about procedures and policies, and judgment and interpretation of facts (De Dreu & Weingart, 2003 ). Process conflict refers to how tasks should be accomplished (Jehn, Greer, Levine, & Szulanski, 2008 ). Examples are disagreements about logistic and delegation issues (Jehn et al., 2008 ). Finally, relationship conflict refers to “interpersonal incompatibility” (Jehn, 1995 , p. 257). Examples of relationship conflict are conflict about personal taste, political preferences, values, and interpersonal style (De Dreu & Weingart, 2003 ). All three types of conflict—task, process, and personal (relational) conflicts—are usually disruptive, especially personal conflict, which is highly disruptive (De Dreu & Weingart, 2003 ; Jehn, 1995 , 1997 ). A review and meta-analysis by De Wit et al. ( 2012 ) showed that, under specific conditions, task conflict can be productive for teams. Moreover, conflict can wreck a team’s efforts to share information and reach a consensus (Amason & Schweiger, 1994 ). Therefore, research supporting the benefit of task and relationship conflict is not conclusive and each situation varies. What seems to be clear is that managing conflict efficiently to avoid escalation is a priority for teams.

Conflict Behavior, Conflict Management, and Conflict Resolution

Conflict behavior, conflict management, and conflict resolution are different layers of a conflict process and therefore should be distinguished. Conflict behavior is any behavioral response to the experience of frustration, while conflict management is the deliberate action to deal with conflictive situations, both to prevent or to escalate them. Also, conflict management is differentiated from conflict resolution, which is specific action aimed to end a conflict.

Conflict Behavior

Conflict behavior is the behavioral response to the experience of conflict (Van de Vliert et al., 1995 ). Conflict behavior is defined as one party’s reaction to the perception that one’s own and the other party’s current aspiration cannot be achieved simultaneously (Deutsch, 1973 ; Pruitt, 1981 ; Rubin, Pruitt, & Kim, 1994 ). It is both what people experiencing conflict intend to do, as well as what they actually do (De Dreu, Evers, Beersma, Kluwer, & Nauta, 2001 ; Van de Vliert, 1997 ). In conflict situations people often respond primarily, following their emotions, more or less conscientiously.

Many factors affect how people respond to the experience of conflict. Social psychology shows the processes are largely unconscious (Wilson, 2004 ). For example, how people respond to intimidating behavior by their supervisor might be primarily influenced by the context and individual perception, as well as previous relations with persons in authority, including parents and teachers (Gelfand & Brett, 2004 ; Van Kleef & Cote, 2007 ). These natural behavioral responses are also referred to as “conflict styles.” They are rooted in our personality and can differ in context. Some people will naturally respond by being friendly and accommodating, where others will start arguing or fighting (Barbuto, Phipps, & Xu, 2010 ; Kilmann & Thomas, 1977 ; Van Kleef & Cote, 2007 ).

Conflict behavior becomes more effective once we are more aware of our natural tendencies and are also able not to act upon them, and instead to show flexibility in behavioral approaches. This is where conflict behavior becomes conflict management. Therefore, one can be a naturally highly accommodating person who will spontaneously give in to others who make demands, but one will be more effective after learning to assess the situation at hand and to carefully decide on a response, which might be quite different from the natural or spontaneous reaction.

Dual-Concern Model

The dual-concern model holds that the way in which parties handle conflicts can de described and is determined by two concerns: concern for self (own interests) and concern for others (relational interests) (Blake & Mouton, 1964 ; Pruitt & Rubin, 1986 ; Rahim, 1983 ; Thomas, 1992 ; Van de Vliert, 1999 ) (see Figure 1 ). Usually, the two concerns define five different conflict behaviors: forcing, avoiding, accommodating, compromising, and problem solving or integrating. These behaviors are studied at the level of general personal conflict styles, closely connected to personality, as well as at the level of strategies and tactics (Euwema & Giebels, 2017 ).

The different conflict styles have been studied intensively, with three approaches. A normative approach, wherein integrating (also known as problem solving) is seen as the preferred behavior for conflict resolution; a contingency approach, exploring conditions under which each of the behaviors is most appropriate; and a conglomerate approach, focusing on a combination of the behaviors (see “ Conglomerate Conflict Behavior ”).

Figure 1. Dual-concern model.

In forcing, one party aims to achieve his or her goal by imposing a solution onto the other party. Concern for one’s own interests and own vision is what matters. There is little attention and care for the interests and needs of the other party, or the relationship with the other (Euwema & Giebels, 2017 ). This style is appropriate when the outcome is important for one party but trivial to the opponent, or when fast decision making is necessary. It becomes inappropriate when issues are complex, when both parties are equally powerful, when the outcome is not worth the effort for one party, or when there is enough time to make a collective decision. Moreover, forcing decisions can seriously damage a relationship and contribute to bullying in the workplace (Baillien, Bollen, Euwema, & De Witte, 2014 ); however, normative forcing, which is referring to rules and imposing them, can be effective (De Dreu, 2005 ). Note that some alternative terms that have been used for forcing in the literature are competitive , contending , or adversarial behavior .

With avoiding, one party aims to stay out of any confrontation with the other. This behavior prevents efforts to yield, to negotiate constructively, or to compete for one’s own gains. The conflict issue receives little attention, usually because the avoiding party thinks he or she won’t gain from entering into the conflict (Euwema & Giebels, 2017 ; Van de Vliert, 1997 ). Avoiding may be used when the benefits of resolving the conflict are not worth confronting the other party, especially when the problem is trivial or minor; when no good solutions are available for now; or when time is needed (Van Erp et al., 2011 ). An important motive for avoiding also is to prevent loss of face and to maintain the relationship. This is particularly true in collectivistic cultures, particularly in Asian societies (Oetzel et al., 2001 ). Avoiding is inappropriate when the issues are important to a party, when the parties cannot wait, or when immediate action is required (Rahim, 2002 ). Rubin, Pruitt, and Kim ( 1994 ) distinguished between long-term avoidance, which is a permanent move to leave the conflict, and short-term avoidance, defined as temporary inaction.

Accommodating

Accommodating is giving in or going along with the ideas, wishes, and needs of the other party. Accommodating usually is the result of a low concern for one’s own conflictive interests combined with a high concern for the interests and needs of the other party. Giving in often is related to a strong need for harmony and a sensitivity to the needs of the other. Accommodation is useful when a party is not familiar with the issues involved in the conflict, when the opponent is right, when the issue is much more important to the other party, and in order to build or maintain a long-term relationship, in exchange for future consideration when needed. Giving in also can be an educational strategy, giving space to the other to find out what the effect will be. Accommodating is less appropriate when the issue is of great concern, when accommodation creates frustration, or when accommodation reinforces dynamics of exploitation (Spaho, 2013 ). Note that an alternative term for this concept that can be found in the literature is yielding .

Compromising

Compromising involves searching for a middle ground, with an eye on both one’s own interest and the interest of the other. The premise is that both parties must find a middle ground where everyone receives equal consideration, meaning that each party makes some concession (Van de Vliert, 1997 ). Compromising is appropriate when a balance of forces exists and the goals of parties are mutually exclusive (Buddhodev, 2011 ). Compromise leads to a democratic solution; however, it may prevent arriving at a creative solution to the problem and a limited effort to increase resources before distributing them (Spaho, 2013 ).

Problem Solving or Integrating

Problem solving is a win–win strategy aimed at “optimizing rather than satisfying the parties” (Van de Vliert, 1997 , p. 36). Great value is attached to one’s own interests and vision, but also a lot of attention is given to the needs, ideas, and interests of the other. One looks for open and creative solutions that meet both interests. Problem solving or integrating is useful in dealing with complex issues, and it allows both parties to share skills, information, and other resources to redefine the problem and formulate alternative solutions. It is, however, inappropriate when the task is simple or trivial, and when there is no time. Also, it is more difficult to develop when the other party does not have experience in problem solving or when the parties are unconcerned about the outcomes (Pruitt & Rubin, 1986 ). Note that some alternative terms that can be found in the literature for this concept are cooperation and collaboration .

The dual-concern model is used as a contingency model, describing which conflict behaviors are used best under what conditions (Van de Vliert et al., 1997 ), and also as a normative model, promoting integrating behaviors as the most effective style, particularly when it comes to joined outcomes and long-term effectiveness. Forcing, in contrast, is often described as a noncooperative behavior, with risk of escalated and unilateral outcomes (Blake & Mouton, 1964 ; Burke, 1970 ; Deutsch, 1973 ; Fisher & Ury, 1981 ; Pruitt & Rubin, 1986 ; Rahim, 2010 ; Thomas, 1992 ). As a result, authors define forcing and integrating as two opposed behavioral approaches (Tjosvold, Morishima, & Belsheim, 1999 ). Following this model, many scholars during the 1970s and 1980s proposed that individuals use a single behavior in conflict, or that the behaviors should be seen as independent. Therefore, the antecedents and effects of different conflict behaviors are often analyzed separately (Tjosvold, 1997 ; Volkema & Bergmann, 2001 ). However, parties usually try to achieve personal outcomes, and try to reach mutual agreements by combining several behaviors in a conflict episode (Van de Vliert, 1997 ). This is the basic assumption of the conglomerate conflict behavior (CCB) theory (Van de Vliert, Euwema, & Huismans, 1995 ), which established that conflict behaviors are used in a compatible manner, sequentially or simultaneously.

Conglomerate Conflict Behavior (CCB)

In the dual-concern model, a contrast is made between forcing (contending with an adversary in a direct way) and integrating (reconciling the parties’ basic interests) as two opposed behavioral approaches (Tjosvold et al., 1999 ). However, the CCB framework assumes that individual reactions to conflict typically are complex and consist of multiple components of behavior (Van de Vliert, 1997 , Van de Vliert et al., 1995 ). The CCB theory covers the idea that behavioral components may occur simultaneously or sequentially and that the combination drives toward effectiveness (Euwema & Van Emmerik, 2007 ; Medina & Benitez, 2011 ). The theory has been supported in studies analyzing conflict management effectiveness in different contexts, such as in managerial behavior (Munduate, Ganaza, Peiro, & Euwema, 1999 ), in military peacekeeping (Euwema & Van Emmerik, 2007 ) and by worker representatives in organizations (Elgoibar, 2013 ).

The main reason that people combine different behaviors is because conflicts are often mixed-motive situations (Euwema, Van de Vliert, & Bakker, 2003 ; Euwema & Van Emmerik, 2007 ; Walton & McKersie, 1965 ). Mixed-motive situations are described as situations that pose a conflict between securing immediate benefits through competition, and pursuing benefits for oneself and others through cooperation with other people (Komorita & Parks, 1995 ; Sheldon & Fishbach, 2011 ). Therefore, a person's behavior in a conflict episode is viewed as a combination of some of the five forms of conflict behaviors. An example of sequential complex behavior is to first put the demands clearly (forcing), followed by integrating (searching for mutual gains, and expanding the pie), and finally compromising, where distributive issues are dealt with in a fair way. An example of serial complexity can be found in multi-issue conflict, when for some issues conflict can be avoided, while for high priorities, demands are put on the table in a forcing way. Another CCB pattern is the conglomeration of accommodating and forcing. This pattern is sometimes referred to as “logrolling” (Van de Vliert, 1997 , p. 35), and it is a classic part of integrative strategies, to maximize the outcomes for both parties. Logrolling behavior consists of accommodating the high-concern issues of the other party and forcing one’s own high-concern issues. This approach is usually helpful in multi-issue trade negotiations; however, it requires openness of both parties to acknowledging key interests.

How to Explore Your Tendency in Conflict

The most famous and popular conflict behavior questionnaires are:

MODE (Management of Differences Exercise). MODE, developed in 1974 by Thomas and Killman, presents 30 choices between two options representing different conflict styles.

ROCI (Rahim's Organizational Conflict Inventory). The ROCI is a list of 28 items that measures the five styles of conflict behavior described.

Dutch Test of Conflict Handling. This list of 20 items measures the degree of preference for the five styles (Van de Vliert & Euwema, 1994 ; De Dreu et al., 2001 , 2005 ). It has been validated internationally.

Conflict management is deliberate action to deal with conflictive situations, either to prevent or to escalate them. Unlike conflict behavior, conflict management encompasses cognitive responses to conflict situations, which can vary from highly competitive to highly cooperative. Conflict management does not necessarily involve avoidance, reduction, or termination of conflict. It involves designing effective strategies to minimize the dysfunctions of conflict and to enhance the constructive functions of conflict in order to improve team and organizational effectiveness (Rahim, 2002 ).

Conflicts are not necessarily destructive (De Dreu & Gelfand, 2008 ; Euwema, Munduate, Elgoibar, Pender, & Garcia, 2015 ), and research has shown that constructive conflict management is possible (Coleman, Deutsch, & Marcus, 2014 ). The benefits of conflict are much more likely to arise when conflicts are discussed openly, and when discussion skillfully promotes new ideas and generates creative insights and agreements (Coleman et al., 2014 ; De Dreu & Gelfand, 2008 ; Euwema et al., 2015 ; Tjosvold, Won, & Chen, 2014 ). To make a constructive experience from conflict, conflict needs to be managed effectively.

Deutsch’s classic theory of competition and cooperation describes the antecedents and consequences of parties’ cooperative or competitive orientations and allows insights into what can give rise to constructive or destructive conflict processes (Deutsch, 1973 , 2002 ). The core of the theory is the perceived interdependence of the parties, so that the extent that protagonists believe that their goals are cooperative (positively related) or competitive (negatively related) affects their interaction and thus the outcomes. Positive interdependence promotes openness, cooperative relations, and integrative problem solving. Perceived negative interdependence on the other hand, induces more distance and less openness, and promotes competitive behavior, resulting in distributive bargaining or win–lose outcomes (Tjosvold et al., 2014 ).

Whether the protagonists believe their goals are cooperative or competitive very much affects their expectations, interactions, and outcomes. If parties perceive that they can reach their goals only if the other party also reaches their goals, the goal interdependence is positively perceived and therefore parties will have higher concern for the other’s goals and manage the conflict cooperatively (De Dreu et al., 2001 ; Tjosvold et al., 2014 ). On the contrary, if one party perceives that they can reach their goals only if the other party fails to obtain their goals, the interdependence becomes negatively perceived and the approach to conflict becomes competitive (Tjosvold et al., 2014 ). Goals can also be independent; in that case, conflict can be avoided (the parties don’t need to obstruct each other’s goals to be successful). Therefore, how parties perceive their goals’ interdependence affects how they negotiate conflict and whether the conflict is constructively or destructively managed (Alper et al., 2000 ; Deutsch, 1973 ; Johnson & Johnson, 1989 ; Tjosvold, 2008 ).

Successfully managing conflict cooperatively requires intellectual, emotional, and relational capabilities in order to share information, to contribute to value creation, and to discuss differences constructively (Fisher & Ury, 1981 ; Tjosvold et al., 2014 ). In contrast, a competitive-destructive process leads to material losses and dissatisfaction, worsening relations between parties, and negative psychological effects on at least one party—the loser of a win–lose context (Deutsch, 2014 ).

Deutsch’s theory proposes that emphasizing cooperative goals in conflict by demonstrating a commitment to pursue mutually beneficial solutions creates high-quality resolutions and relationships, while focusing on competitive interests by pursuing one’s own goals at the expense of the other’s escalates conflict, resulting in imposed solutions and suspicious relationships (Tjosvold et al., 2014 ).

In summary, Deutsch’s theory states that the context in which the conflict process is expressed drives parties toward either a cooperative or a competitive orientation in conflicts (Alper et al., 2000 ; Deutsch, 2006 ; Johnson & Johnson, 1989 ). In other words, a cooperative context is related to a cooperative conflict pattern, and a competitive context is related to a competitive conflict pattern. When parties have a cooperative orientation toward conflict, parties discuss their differences with the objective of clarifying them and attempting to find a solution that is satisfactory to both parties—both parties win (Carnevale & Pruitt, 1992 ). On the contrary, in competition, there is usually a winner and a loser (Carnevale & Pruitt, 1992 ) (see Table 1 ). In the CCB model, the patterns can include cooperative (i.e., integrating) and competitive (i.e. forcing) behavior; however, the cooperative pattern will be dominated by integrating while the competitive pattern will be dominated by forcing (Elgoibar, 2013 ).

Table 1. Characteristics of Cooperative and Competitive Climates

Source : Coleman, Deutsch, and Marcus ( 2014 ).

How to Manage Conflicts Constructively

The need for trust.

Trust is commonly defined as a belief or expectation about others’ benevolent motives during a social interaction (Holmes & Rempel, 1989 ; Rousseau et al., 1998 ). Mutual trust is one important antecedent as well as a consequence of cooperation in conflicts (Deutsch, 1983 ; Ferrin, Bligh, & Kohles, 2008 ). As Nahapiet and Ghoshal pointed out, “Trust lubricates cooperation, and cooperation itself breeds trust” ( 1998 , p.255). There is ample evidence that constructive conflict and trust are tightly and positively related (Hempel, Zhang, & Tjosvold, 2009 ; Bijlsma & Koopman, 2003 ; Lewicki, Tonlinson, & Gillespie, 2006 ).

Successful constructive conflict management requires maximal gathering and exchange of information in order to identify problems and areas of mutual concern, to search for alternatives, to assess their implications, and to achieve openness about preferences in selecting optimal solutions (Bacon & Blyton, 2007 ; Johnson & Johnson, 1989 ; Tjosvold, 1999 ). Trust gives parties the confidence to be open with each other, knowing that the shared information won’t be used against them (Zaheer & Zaheer, 2006 ). Various studies revealed that trust leads to constructive conglomerate behaviors and to more integrative outcomes in interpersonal and intergroup conflicts (Lewicki, Elgoibar, & Euwema, 2016 ; Lewicki, McAllister, & Bies, 1998 ; Ross & LaCroix, 1996 ).

How can trust be promoted? Developing trust is challenging (Gunia, Brett, & Nandkeolyar, 2014 ; Hempel et al., 2009 ). Numerous scholars have noted that trust is easier to destroy than to create (Hempel et al., 2009 ; Meyerson et al., 1996 ). There are two main reasons for this assertion. First, trust-breaking events are often more visible and noticeable than positive trust-building actions (Kramer, 1999 ). Second, trust-breaking events are judged to have a higher impact on trust judgments than positive events (Slovic, 1993 ). Furthermore, Slovic ( 1993 ) concluded that trust-breaking events are more credible than sources of good news. Thus, the general belief is that trust is easier to destroy than it is to build, and trust rebuilding may take even longer than it took to create the original level of trust (Lewicki et al., 2016 ).

However, there is room for optimism, and different strategies have been shown to promote trust. As held in social exchange theory (Blau, 1964 ), risk taking by one party in supporting the other party has been found to signal trust to the other party (Serva et al., 2005 ). Yet, fears of exploitation make trust in conflict management and negotiation scarce. Therefore, the use of trust-promoting strategies depends on the specific situation, and parties need practical guidance on how and when to manage conflict constructively by means of promoting mutual trust.

How does the possibility of trust development between parties depend on the conflict context? Based on this practical question, some strategies for trust development have been proposed (Fisher & Ury, 1981 ; Fulmer & Gelfand, 2012 ; Gunia, Brett, & Nandkeolyar, 2012 ; Lewicki et al., 2016 ). In relationships where trust is likely, the following strategies can help: assume trustworthiness, prioritize your interests and give away a little information about them, engage in reciprocity (concessions), highlight similarities and spend time together, get to know your counterpart personally and try to be likable, behave consistently and predictably, and paraphrase your counterpart’s positions. In relationships where trust seems possible: emphasize common goals; focus on the subject, not on the people; look to the future and find a shared vision; mix questions and answers about interests and priorities—the fundamental elements of information sharing—with making and justifying offers; take a break; suggest another approach; call in a mediator; and forgive the other party’s mistakes. In relationships where trust is not possible, more cautious strategies can help: make multi-issue offers; think holistically about your counterpart’s interests; engage in reciprocity (concessions); express sympathy, apologize, or compliment your counterpart; and look for preference patterns in your counterpart’s offers and responses.

Constructive Controversy

C onstructive controversy is defined as the open-minded discussion of conflicting perspectives for mutual benefit, which occurs when protagonists express their opposing ideas that obstruct resolving the issues, at least temporarily (Tjosvold et al., 2014 ). Indicators of constructive controversy include listening carefully to each other’s opinion, trying to understand each other’s concerns, and using opposing views to understand the problem better. These skills are considered vitally important for developing and implementing cooperative problem-solving processes successfully and effectively.

Deutsch ( 2014 ) stated that there haven’t been many systematic discussions of the skills involved in constructive solutions to conflict, and he proposed three main types of skills for constructive conflict management:

Rapport-building skills are involved in establishing effective relationships between parties (such as breaking the ice; reducing fears, tensions, and suspicion; overcoming resistance to negotiation; and fostering realistic hope and optimism).

Cooperative conflict-resolution skills are concerned with developing and maintaining a cooperative conflict resolution process among the parties involved (such as identifying the type of conflict in which the parties are involved; reframing the issues so that conflict is perceived as a mutual problem to be resolved cooperatively; active listening and responsive communication; distinguishing between effective relationships between parties and positions; encouraging, supporting, and enhancing the parties; being alert to cultural differences and the possibilities of misunderstanding arising from them; and controlling anger).

Group process and decision-making skills are involved in developing a creative and productive process (such as monitoring progress toward group goals; eliciting, clarifying, coordinating, summarizing, and integrating the contributions of the various participants; and maintaining group cohesion).

Tjosvold et al. ( 2014 ) and Johnson et al. ( 2014 ) also elaborate on the skills needed for facilitating open-minded discussions and constructive controversy. They developed four mutually reinforcing strategies for managing conflict constructively:

Developing and expressing one’s own view. Parties need to know what each of the others wants and believes, and expressing one’s own needs, feelings, and ideas is essential to gaining that knowledge. By strengthening expression of their own positions, both parties can learn to investigate their position, present the best case they can for it, defend it vigorously, and try at the same time to refute opposing views. However, expressing one’s own position needs to be supplemented with an open-minded approach to the other’s position.

Questioning and understanding others’ views. Listening and understanding opposing views, as well as defending one’s own views, makes discussing conflicts more challenging but also more rewarding; therefore, the parties can point out weaknesses in each other’s arguments to encourage better development and expression of positions by finding more evidence and strengthening their reasoning.

Integrating and creating solutions. The creation of new alternatives lays the foundation for genuine agreements about a solution that both parties can accept and implement. However, protagonists may have to engage in repeated discussion to reach an agreement, or indeed they may be unable to create a solution that is mutually acceptable, and then they can both learn to become less adamant, to exchange views directly, and to show that they are trying to understand and integrate each other’s ideas so that all may benefit.

Agreeing to and implementing solutions. Parties can learn to seek the best reasoned judgment, instead of focusing on “winning”; to criticize ideas, not people; to listen and understand everyone’s position, even if they do not agree with it; to differentiate positions before trying to integrate them; and to change their minds when logically persuaded to do so.

Conflict Resolution

Conflict resolution processes are aimed at ending a conflict. So, while conflict management can also include escalation, conflict resolution searches for a way of ending the conflict. The difference between resolution and management of conflict is more than semantic (Robbins, 1978 ). Conflict resolution means reduction, elimination, or termination of conflict.

To find a resolution, parties have to bring an extra piece of information, relate the information they have differently, or transform the issue, change the rules, change the actors or the structure, or bring in a third party (Vayrynen, 1991 ). The most popular conflict resolution processes are: negotiation, mediation, conflict coaching, and arbitration (Rahim, 2002 ). Conflict resolution can also be accomplished by ruling by authorities. Integration of the different techniques sequentially or simultaneously has been shown to support optimal conflict resolution (Jones, 2016 ).

Negotiation

Negotiation is a process in which the parties attempt to jointly create an agreement that resolves a conflict between them (Lewicki & Tomlinson, 2014 ). Walton and McKersie ( 1965 ) were the first to identify the two polar yet interdependent strategies known as distributive and integrative negotiation. Distributive negotiation means that activities are instrumental to the attainment of one party’s goals when they are in basic conflict with those of the other party. Integrative negotiation means that parties’ activities are oriented to find common or complementary interests and to solve problems confronting both parties. Other scholars also focused on the opposite tactical requirements of the two strategies, using a variety of terms, such as contending versus cooperating (Pruitt, 1981 ), claiming value versus creating value (Lax & Sebenius, 1987 ), and the difference between positions and interests (Fisher & Ury, 1981 ).

If a distributive strategy is pursued too vigorously, a negotiator may gain a greater share of gains, but of a smaller set of joint gains, or, worse, may generate an outcome in which both parties lose. However, if a negotiator pursues an integrative negotiation in a single-minded manner—being totally cooperative and giving freely accurate and credible information about his/her interests—he or she can be taken advantage of by the other party (Walton & McKersie, 1965 ). The different proposals that have been formulated to cope with these central dilemmas in negotiation are mainly based on a back-and-forth communication process between the parties, which is linked to the negotiators’ interpersonal skills (Brett, Shapiro, & Lytle, 1998 ; Fisher & Ury, 1981 ; Rubin et al., 1994 ).

Mediation is process by which a third party facilitates constructive communication among disputants, including decision making, problem solving and negotiation, in order to reach a mutually acceptable agreement (Bollen, Munduate, & Euwema, 2016 ; Goldman, Cropanzano, Stein, & Benson, 2008 ; Moore, 2014 ). Using mediation in conflict resolution has been proven to prevent the negative consequences of conflict in the workplace (Bollen & Euwema, 2010 ; Bollen et al., 2016 ), in collective bargaining (Martinez-Pecino et al., 2008 ), in inter- and intragroup relations (Jones, 2016 ), and in interpersonal relations (Herrman, 2006 ). However, mediation is not a magic bullet and works better in conflicts that are moderate rather than extreme, when parties are motivated to resolve the conflict, and when parties have equal power, among other characteristics (Kressel, 2014 ).

Conflict Coaching

Conflict coaching is a new and rapidly growing process in the public as well as private sector (Brinkert, 2016 ). In this process, a conflict coach works with a party to accomplish three goals (Jones & Brinkert, 2008 ): (a) analysis and coherent understanding of the conflict, (b) identification of a future preferred direction, and (c) skills development to implement the preferred strategy. Therefore, a conflict coach is defined as a conflict expert who respects the other party’s self-determination and aims to promote the well-being of the parties involved. Giebels and Janssen ( 2005 ) found that, when outside help was called in, parties in conflict experienced fewer negative consequences in terms of individual well-being than people who did not ask for third-party help.

Sometimes, the leader of a team can act as conflict coach. A study by Romer and colleagues ( 2012 ) showed that a workplace leader’s problem-solving approach to conflicts increased employees’ perception of justice and their sense that they had a voice in their workplace, as well as reduced employees’ stress (De Reuver & Van Woerkom, 2010 ; Romer et al., 2012 ). In contrast, the direct expression of power in the form of forcing behavior can harm employees’ well-being (Peterson & Harvey, 2009 ). A forcing leader may become an additional party to the conflict (i.e., employees may turn against their leader; Romer et al, 2012 ).

Conflict coaching and mediation are different processes. First, in conflict coaching, only one party is involved in the process, while in mediation, the mediator helps all the parties in conflict to engage in constructive interaction. Second, conflict coaching focuses on direct skills instructions to the party (i.e., negotiation skills). In that, conflict coaching is also a leadership development tool (Romer et al., 2012 ). There is a growing tendency to integrate conflict coaching and workplace mediation, particularly in preparation for conflict resolution, because the coach can help the coached party to investigate options and weigh the advantages of the different options (Jones, 2016 ).

Arbitration

Arbitration is an institutionalized procedure in which a third party provides a final and binding or voluntary decision (Lewicki, Saunders, & Barry, 2014 ; Mohr & Spekman, 1994 ). Arbitration allows the parties to have control over the process, but not over the outcomes. Therefore, arbitration differs from negotiation, mediation, and conflict coaching, in which the parties decide the agreement themselves (Posthuma & Dworkin, 2000 ; Lewicki et al., 2014 ). In arbitration, the third party listens to the parties and decides the outcome. This procedure is used mainly in conflicts between organizations, in commercial disputes, and in collective labor conflicts (Beechey, 2000 ; Elkouri & Elkouri, 1995 ).

Decision Making by Authorities

The strategies of negotiation, mediation, conflict coaching, and arbitration have in common that the parties together decide about the conflict process, even when they agree to accept an arbitration. This is different from how authorities resolve conflict. Decision making by authorities varies from parents’ intervening in children’s fights to rulings by teachers, police officers, managers, complaint officers, ombudsmen, and judges. Here, often one party complains and the authority acts to intervene and end the conflict. This strategy is good for ending physical violence and misuse of power. However, the authorities’ decisive power is limited, and therefore in most situations authorities are strongly urged to first explore the potential for conflict resolution and reconciliation among the parties involved. The authority can act as an escalator for the process, or as a facilitator, and only in cases of immediate threat can intervene or rule as a last resort. Authorities who employ this strategy can improve the learning skills of the parties and can impose upon the parties an acceptance of responsibility, both for the conflict and for the ways to end it.

It is important to emphasize the natural and positive aspects of conflict management. Conflict occurs in all areas of organizations and private lives and its management is vital for their effectiveness. Through conflict, conventional thinking is challenged, threats and opportunities are identified, and new solutions are forged (Tjosvold et al., 2014 ). Therefore, when conflict occurs, it shouldn’t be avoided but should be managed constructively.

Further Reading

  • Coleman, P. , Deutsch, M. , & Marcus, E. (2014). The handbook of conflict resolution . Theory and practice . San Francisco: John Wiley & Sons.
  • De Dreu, C.K.W. , Evers, A. , Beersma, B. , Kluwer, E. , & Nauta, A. (2001). A theory—based measure of conflict management strategies in the workplace. Journal of Organizational Behavior , 22 (6), 645–668.
  • Elgoibar, P. , Euwema, M. , & Munduate, L. (2016). Trust building and constructive conflict management in industrial relations . Springer International.
  • Lewicki, R. J. , McAllister, D. J. , & Bies, R. J. (1998). Trust and distrust: New relationship and realities. Academy of Management Review , 23 , 438–458.
  • Pruitt, D. G. & Rubin, J. Z. (1986). Social conflict: Escalation, stalemate, and settlement . New York: McGraw Hill.
  • Van de Vliert, E. , Euwema, M.C. , & Huismans, S.E. (1995). Managing conflict with a subordinate or a superior: Effectiveness of conglomerated behavior. Journal of Applied Psychology , 80 (2), 271–281.
  • Wall, J. A. , & Callister, R. R. (1995). Conflict and its management. Journal of Management , 21 , 515–558.
  • Alper, S. , Tjosvold, D. , & Law, K. S. (2000). Conflict management, efficacy, and performance in organizational teams. Personnel Psychology , 53 , 625–642.
  • Amason, A. C. , & Schweiger, D. M. (1994). Resolving the paradox of conflict: Strategic decision making and organizational performance. International Journal of Conflict Management , 5 , 239–253.
  • Bacon, N. , & Blyton, P. (2007). Conflict for mutual gains. Journal of Management Studies , 44 (5), 814–834.
  • Baillien, E. , Bollen, K. , Euwema, M. , & De Witte, H. (2014). Conflicts and conflict management styles as precursors of workplace bullying: A two-wave longitudinal study. European Journal of Work and Organizational Psychology , 23 (4), 511–524.
  • Barbuto, J. E. , Phipps, K. A. , & Xu, Y. (2010). Testing relationships between personality, conflict styles and effectiveness. International Journal of Conflict Management , 21 (4), 434–447.
  • Beechey, J. (2000) International commercial arbitration: A process under review and change. Dispute Resolution Journal , 55 (3), 32–36.
  • Bijlsma, K. , & Koopman, P. (2003) Introduction: Trust within organizations. Personnel Review , 32 (5), 543–555.
  • Blake, R. R. , & Mouton, J. S. (1964). The managerial GRID . Houston: Gulf.
  • Blau, E. M. (1964). Exchange and power in social life . New York: Wiley.
  • Bollen, K. , Euwema, M. , & Müller, P. (2010). Why Are Subordinates Less Satisfied with Mediation? The Role of Uncertainty. Negotiation Journal , 26 (4), 417–433.
  • Bollen, K. , & Euwema, M. (2013). Workplace mediation: An underdeveloped research area. Negotiation Journal , 29 , 329–353.
  • Bollen, K. , Munduate, L. , & Euwema, M. (2016). Advancing workplace mediation: Integrating theory and practice . Springer International.
  • Brett, J. M. , Shapiro, D. L. , & Lytle, A. L. (1998). Breaking the bonds of reciprocity in negotiations. Academy of Management Journal , 41 (4), 410–424.
  • Brinkert, R. (2016). An appreciative approach to conflict: Mediation and conflict coaching. In K. Bollen , M. Euwema , & L. Munduate (Eds.), Advancing workplace mediation: Integrating theory and practice . Springer International.
  • Brown, L. D. (1983). Managing Conflict at Organizational Interfaces. Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley.
  • Buddhodev, S. A. (2011). Conflict management: making life easier. The IUP Journal of Soft Skills , 5 (4), 31–43.
  • Burke, R. J. (1970). Methods of resolving superior-subordinate conflict: The constructive use of subordinate differences and disagreements. Organizational Behavior and Human Performance , 5 , 393–411.
  • Carnevale, P. J. , & Pruitt, D. G. (1992). Negotiation and mediation. Annual Review of Psychology , 43 , 531–582.
  • Coleman, P. , Deutsch, M. , & Marcus, E. (2014). The handbook of conflict resolution. Theory and practice . San Francisco: John Wiley & Sons.
  • De Dreu, C. K. (2005). Conflict and conflict management. Wiley Encyclopedia of Management , 11 , 1–4.
  • De Dreu, C. K. , & Gelfand, M. J. (2008). Conflict in the workplace: Sources, functions, and dynamics across multiple levels of analysis . New York: Lawrence Erlbaum Associates
  • De Dreu, C. K. W. , Evers, A. , Beersma, B. , Kluwer, E. , & Nauta, A. (2001). A theory-based measure of conflict management strategies in the workplace. Journal of Organizational Behavior , 22 (6), 645–668.
  • De Dreu, C. K. W. , & Weingart, L. R. (2003). Task versus relationship conflict, team performance, and team member satisfaction: A meta-analysis. Journal of Applied Psychology , 88 (4), 741–749.
  • De Reuver, R. , & Van Woerkom, M. (2010). Can conflict management be an antidote to subordinate absenteeism? Journal of Managerial Psychology , 25 (5), 479–494.
  • De Wit, F. R. , Greer, L. L. , & Jehn, K. A. (2012). The paradox of intragroup conflict: A meta-analysis. Journal of Applied Psychology , 97 (2), 360–390.
  • Deutsch, M. (1949). A theory of cooperation and competition. Human Relations , 2 , 129–151.
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  • Deutsch, M. (2002). Social psychology’s contributions to the study of conflict resolution. Negotiation Journal , 18 (4), 307–320.
  • Deutsch, M. (2006). Cooperation and competition. In M. Deutsch , P. Coleman , & E. Marcus (Eds.), The handbook of conflict resolution . San Francisco: John Wiley & Sons.
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Applying a Problem‑Solving Approach to Conflict Cornell Course

Course overview.

When most of us face conflict, we often either avoid dealing with it, or we jump in and try to force a solution. These responses may be driven by a lack of comfort with or even a fear of conflict. Unfortunately, neither response is always correct, and neither approach should be the first step. Professors Klingel and Nobles will share how to overcome these instincts and successfully apply a problem-solving approach to conflict.

The first course in this series, “Diagnosing Workplace Conflict,” focused on fully diagnosing a conflict without jumping into problem solving. In this course, you'll look at how to best handle a fully diagnosed conflict using a problem-solving approach. A common issue we'll address is jumping to solutions before understanding the scope of the conflict and the needs that will have to be addressed to resolve it. Thus, you'll begin by determining the scope. Depending on the scope you may move forward with the problem-solving approach, or, you may decide to let it go. The problem-solving approach, which consists of eight steps that can be broken down into three key elements, is the framework through which this course is taught. In the course project, you'll practice applying this approach to a conflict of your choosing. The approach is intended to be used when solving conflict you are directly involved in. Despite this, we'll offer practical advice on how you could adapt this for other use cases.

You are required to have completed the following course or have equivalent experience before taking this course:

  • Diagnosing Workplace Conflict

Key Course Takeaways

  • Move from conflict diagnosis to problem solving
  • Determine the scope of the conflict and how to proceed
  • Determine the problem, interests, and criteria for successful resolution
  • Generate options and agree on a solution
  • Implement and monitor a measurable solution

conflict resolution and problem solving

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How it works, course authors.

Katrina Nobles

  • Certificates Authored

Katrina Nobles is the Director of Conflict Programs for the Scheinman Institute on Conflict Resolution at the Cornell University ILR School, focusing on educating the next generation of neutrals and practitioners on campus and in the workplace. Professor Nobles designs curriculum, instructs professional programs, and facilitates discussions for organizational workplace conflicts. She also teaches the Campus Mediation Practicum, an on-campus credit course that applies mediation skills to the campus judicial system, allowing students to work as peer mediators. 

Professor Nobles has presented at national conflict resolution conferences on facilitating collaborative problem solving, cross-cultural communication, and conflict diagnosis. She has practiced mediation for over 15 years, and prior to her employment at Cornell, Professor Nobles was the Cortland County Coordinator for New Justice Mediation Services. During that time, she mediated hundreds of community, child custody/visitation, child support, and family disputes. Professor Nobles holds a Master’s degree in Conflict Analysis and Engagement from Antioch University Midwest.

  • Conflict Resolution

Sally Klingel

Sally Klingel is the director of Labor-Management Relations programming for the Scheinman Institute on Conflict Resolution in Cornell’s School of Industrial and Labor Relations.   She specializes in the design and implementation of conflict and negotiation systems, labor-management partnerships, collective bargaining strategies, strategic planning, and leadership development.  Her work with Cornell over the past 20 years has included training, consulting, and research with organizations in a variety of industries, local, state and federal government agencies, union internationals and locals, public schools and universities, and worker owned companies.

Sally Klingel holds a M.S. in Organizational Behavior from Cornell University’s School of Industrial and Labor Relations, and a B.A. from the University of Michigan. She has authored articles, monographs and book chapters on innovations in labor-management relations and conflict methods.

  • Labor Relations

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What is conflict?

Causes of conflict in a relationship, how do you respond to conflict, conflict resolution, stress, and emotions, core skill 1: quick stress relief, core skill 2: emotional awareness, nonverbal communication and conflict resolution, more tips for managing and resolving conflict, conflict resolution skills.

Whatever the cause of disagreements and disputes at home or work, these skills can help you resolve conflict in a constructive way and keep your relationships strong and growing.

conflict resolution and problem solving

Conflict is a normal part of any healthy relationship. After all, two people can’t be expected to agree on everything, all the time. The key is not to fear or try to avoid conflict but to learn how to resolve it in a healthy way.

When conflict is mismanaged, it can cause great harm to a relationship, but when handled in a respectful, positive way, conflict provides an opportunity to strengthen the bond between two people. Whether you’re experiencing conflict at home, work, or school, learning these skills can help you resolve differences in a healthy way and build stronger, more rewarding relationships.

Conflict 101

  • A conflict is more than just a disagreement. It is a situation in which one or both parties perceive a threat (whether or not the threat is real).
  • Conflicts continue to fester when ignored. Because conflicts involve perceived threats to our well-being and survival, they stay with us until we face and resolve them.
  • We respond to conflicts based on our perceptions of the situation, not necessarily to an objective review of the facts. Our perceptions are influenced by our life experiences, culture, values, and beliefs.
  • Conflicts trigger strong emotions. If you aren’t comfortable with your emotions or able to manage them in times of stress, you won’t be able to resolve conflict successfully.
  • Conflicts are an opportunity for growth. When you’re able to resolve conflict in a relationship, it builds trust. You can feel secure knowing your relationship can survive challenges and disagreements.

Conflict arises from differences, both large and small. It occurs whenever people disagree over their values, motivations, perceptions, ideas, or desires. Sometimes these differences appear trivial, but when a conflict triggers strong feelings, a deep personal need is often at the core of the problem. These needs can range from the need to feel safe and secure or respected and valued, to the need for greater closeness and intimacy.

Think about the opposing needs of a toddler and a parent. The child’s need is to explore, so venturing to the street or the cliff edge meets that need. But the parent’s need is to protect the child’s safety, a need that can only be met by limiting the toddler’s exploration. Since these needs are at odds, conflict arises.

The needs of each party play an important role in the long-term success of a relationship. Each deserves respect and consideration. In personal relationships, a lack of understanding about differing needs can result in distance, arguments, and break-ups. In the workplace, differing needs can result in broken deals, decreased profits, and lost jobs.

[Read: Tips for Building a Healthy Relationship]

When you can recognize conflicting needs and are willing to examine them with compassion and understanding, it can lead to creative problem solving, team building, and stronger relationships.

Speak to a Licensed Therapist

BetterHelp is an online therapy service that matches you to licensed, accredited therapists who can help with depression, anxiety, relationships, and more. Take the assessment and get matched with a therapist in as little as 48 hours.

Do you fear conflict or avoid it at all costs? If your perception of conflict comes from painful memories from early childhood or previous unhealthy relationships, you may expect all disagreements to end badly. You may view conflict as demoralizing, humiliating, or something to fear. If your early life experiences left you feeling powerless or out of control, conflict may even be traumatizing for you.

If you’re afraid of conflict, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. When you enter a conflict situation already feeling threatened, it’s tough to deal with the problem at hand in a healthy way. Instead, you’re more likely to either shut down or blow up in anger.

Healthy and unhealthy ways of managing and resolving conflict

Conflict triggers strong emotions and can lead to hurt feelings, disappointment, and discomfort. When handled in an unhealthy manner, it can cause irreparable rifts, resentments, and break-ups. But when conflict is resolved in a healthy way, it increases your understanding of the other person, builds trust, and strengthens your relationships.

If you are out of touch with your feelings or so stressed that you can only pay attention to a limited number of emotions, you won’t be able to understand your own needs. This will make it hard to communicate with others and establish what’s really troubling you. For example, couples often argue about petty differences—the way she hangs the towels, the way he slurps his soup—rather than what is  really bothering them.

The ability to successfully resolve conflict depends on your ability to:

  • Manage stress quickly while remaining alert and calm. By staying calm, you can accurately read and interpret verbal and nonverbal communication.
  • Control your emotions and behavior. When you’re in control of your emotions, you can communicate your needs without threatening, intimidating, or punishing others.
  • Pay attention to the  feelings being expressed as well as the spoken words of others.
  • Be aware of and respect differences. By avoiding disrespectful words and actions, you can almost always resolve a problem faster.

To successfully resolve a conflict, you need to learn and practice two core skills:

  • Quick stress relief: the ability to quickly relieve stress in the moment.
  • Emotional awareness: the ability to remain comfortable enough with your emotions to react in constructive ways, even in the midst of a perceived attack.

Being able to manage and relieve stress in the moment is the key to staying balanced, focused, and in control, no matter what challenges you face. If you don’t know how to stay centered and in control of yourself, you will become overwhelmed in conflict situations and unable to respond in healthy ways.

Psychologist Connie Lillas uses a driving analogy to describe the three most common ways people respond when they’re overwhelmed by stress:

Foot on the gas. An angry or agitated stress response. You’re heated, keyed up, overly emotional, and unable to sit still.

Foot on the brake. A withdrawn or depressed stress response. You shut down, space out, and show very little energy or emotion.

Foot on both gas and brake. A tense and frozen stress response. You “freeze” under pressure and can’t do anything. You look paralyzed, but under the surface you’re extremely agitated.

How stress affects conflict resolution

Stress interferes with the ability to resolve conflict by limiting your ability to:

  • Accurately read another person’s body language .
  • Hear what someone is really saying.
  • Be aware of your own feelings.
  • Be in touch with your own, deep-rooted needs.
  • Communicate your needs clearly.

Is stress a problem for you?

You may be so used to feeling stressed that you’re not even aware you  are stressed. Stress may pose a problem in your life if you identify with the following:

  • You often feel tense or tight somewhere in your body.
  • You’re not aware of movement in your chest or stomach when you breathe.
  • Conflict absorbs your time and attention.

Learn how to manage stress in the moment

One of the most reliable ways to rapidly reduce stress is by engaging one or more of your senses—sight, sound, taste, smell, touch—or through movement. You could squeeze a stress ball, smell a relaxing scent, taste a soothing cup of tea, or look at a treasured photograph. We all tend to respond differently to sensory input, often depending on how we respond to stress, so take some time to find things that are soothing to you. Read: Quick Stress Relief .

Emotional awareness is the key to understanding yourself and others. If you don’t know how or why you feel a certain way, you won’t be able to communicate effectively or resolve disagreements.

[Read: Improving Emotional Intelligence]

Although knowing your own feelings may sound simple, many people ignore or try to sedate strong emotions like anger, sadness, and fear. Your ability to handle conflict, however, depends on being connected to these feelings. If you’re afraid of strong emotions or if you insist on finding solutions that are strictly rational, your ability to face and resolve differences will be limited.

Why emotional awareness is a key factor in resolving conflict

Emotional awareness—the consciousness of your  moment-to-moment emotional experience—and the ability to manage all of your feelings appropriately, is the basis of a communication process that can resolve conflict.

Emotional awareness helps you to:

  • Understand what is really troubling other people
  • Understand yourself, including what is really troubling you
  • Stay motivated until the conflict is resolved
  • Communicate clearly and effectively
  • Interest and influence others

Assessing your level of emotional awareness

The following quiz helps you assess your level of emotional awareness. Answer the following questions with:  almost never, occasionally, often, very often, or  almost always . There are no right or wrong responses, only the opportunity to become better acquainted with your emotional responses.

What kind of relationship do you have with your emotions?

  • Do you experience feelings that flow, encountering one emotion after another as your experiences change from moment to moment?
  • Are your emotions accompanied by physical sensations that you experience in places like your stomach or chest?
  • Do you experience distinct feelings and emotions, such as anger, sadness, fear, and joy, which are evident in different facial expressions?
  • Can you experience intense feelings that are strong enough to capture both your own attention and that of others?
  • Do you pay attention to your emotions? Do they factor into your decision-making?

If any of these experiences are unfamiliar, your emotions may be “turned” down or even off. In either case, you may need help developing your emotional awareness. You can do this by using Helpguide’s free Emotional Intelligence Toolkit.

When people are in the middle of a conflict, the words they use rarely convey the issues at the heart of the problem. But by paying close attention to the other person’s nonverbal signals or “body language,” such as facial expressions, posture, gestures, and tone of voice, you can better understand what the person is really saying. This will allow you to respond in a way that builds trust, and gets to the root of the problem.

[Read: Nonverbal Communication and Body Language]

Your ability to accurately read another person depends on your own emotional awareness. The more aware you are of your own emotions, the easier it will be for you to pick up on the wordless clues that reveal what others are feeling. Think about what you are transmitting to others during conflict, and if what you say matches your body language. If you say “I’m fine,” but you clench your teeth and look away, then your body is clearly signaling you are anything but “fine.” A calm tone of voice, a reassuring touch, or an interested facial expression can go a long way toward relaxing a tense exchange.

You can ensure that the process of managing and resolving conflict is as positive as possible by sticking to the following guidelines:

Listen for what is felt as well as said. When you really listen, you connect more deeply to your own needs and emotions, and to those of other people. Listening also strengthens, informs, and makes it easier for others to hear you when it’s your turn to speak.

Make conflict resolution the priority rather than winning or “being right.” Maintaining and strengthening the relationship, rather than “winning” the argument, should always be your first priority. Be respectful of the other person and their viewpoint.

Focus on the present. If you’re holding on to grudges based on past conflicts, your ability to see the reality of the current situation will be impaired. Rather than looking to the past and assigning blame, focus on what you can do in the here-and-now to solve the problem.

Pick your battles. Conflicts can be draining, so it’s important to consider whether the issue is really worth your time and energy. Maybe you don’t want to surrender a parking space if you’ve been circling for 15 minutes, but if there are dozens of empty spots, arguing over a single space isn’t worth it.

Be willing to forgive. Resolving conflict is impossible if you’re unwilling or unable to forgive others. Resolution lies in releasing the urge to punish, which can serve only to deplete and drain your life.

Know when to let something go. If you can’t come to an agreement, agree to disagree. It takes two people to keep an argument going. If a conflict is going nowhere, you can choose to disengage and move on.

Using humor in conflict resolution

You can avoid many confrontations and resolve arguments and disagreements by communicating in a humorous way . Humor can help you say things that might otherwise be difficult to express without offending someone. However, it’s important that you laugh with the other person, not at them. When humor and play are used to reduce tension and anger, reframe problems, and put the situation into perspective, the conflict can actually become an opportunity for greater connection and intimacy.

More Information

  • CR Kit - Covers causes of conflict, different conflict styles, and fair fighting guidelines to help you positively resolve disagreements. (Conflict Resolution Network)
  • 12 Skills Summary - A 12-step conflict resolution training kit. (Conflict Resolution Network)
  • Effective Communication - The art of listening in conflict resolution. (University of Maryland)
  • 10.3 Causes and Outcomes of Conflict – Organizational Behavior . (n.d.). Retrieved May 25, 2022, from Link
  • Başoğul, C., & Özgür, G. (2016). Role of Emotional Intelligence in Conflict Management Strategies of Nurses. Asian Nursing Research , 10(3), 228–233. Link
  • Corcoran, Kathleen O’Connell, and Brent Mallinckrodt. “Adult Attachment, Self-Efficacy, Perspective Taking, and Conflict Resolution.” Journal of Counseling & Development 78, no. 4 (2000): 473–83. Link
  • Yarnell, Lisa M., and Kristin D. Neff. “Self-Compassion, Interpersonal Conflict Resolutions, and Well-Being.” Self and Identity 12, no. 2 (March 1, 2013): 146–59. Link
  • Tucker, Corinna Jenkins, Susan M. Mchale, and Ann C. Crouter. “Conflict Resolution: Links with Adolescents’ Family Relationships and Individual Well-Being.” Journal of Family Issues 24, no. 6 (September 1, 2003): 715–36. Link

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Conflict Resolution in the Workplace: Effective Techniques and Strategies

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In any workplace, conflicts are inevitable. Whether it's a disagreement over project details, clashing personalities, or differing visions, conflict can arise in numerous ways. However, if managed effectively, conflict can lead to growth, innovation, and stronger team dynamics. Here, we explore some effective techniques and strategies for resolving conflicts in the workplace.  

Understanding the Root Cause  

The first step in resolving any conflict is to understand its root cause. Often, what appears to be a simple disagreement may have deeper underlying issues. Taking the time to understand these underlying issues can prevent future conflicts and ensure that the resolution is comprehensive. Active listening plays a crucial role here. It involves paying close attention to what the other person is saying without interrupting and demonstrating empathy towards their perspective.  

Open Communication  

Once the root cause is identified, open communication is essential. Encourage all parties involved to express their viewpoints honestly and respectfully. Creating a safe environment where everyone feels heard can significantly reduce tension. This can be facilitated through regular team meetings or one-on-one discussions. Utilizing neutral language and avoiding accusatory statements can help in keeping the conversation productive.  

Mediation  

In cases where conflicts cannot be resolved through direct communication, mediation might be necessary. A neutral third party, often a manager or an HR representative, can help mediate the discussion. The mediator's role is to facilitate dialogue, ensure that all voices are heard, and help the parties involved find a mutually acceptable solution. Mediation can be particularly effective in resolving conflicts that have escalated or become highly emotional.  

Focus on Interests, Not Positions  

A common pitfall in conflict resolution is focusing on positions rather than interests. Positions are the specific outcomes people want, while interests are the underlying reasons why those outcomes are desired. By understanding and addressing the interests behind the positions, it's often possible to find creative solutions that satisfy everyone involved. This approach is known as interest-based negotiation and can lead to more sustainable and satisfying resolutions.  

Collaborative Problem-Solving  

Encouraging a collaborative approach to problem-solving can also be highly effective. When team members work together to find a solution, it can foster a sense of ownership and commitment to the outcome. Techniques such as brainstorming, mind mapping, and analysis can be useful tools in this process. The key is to focus on finding a solution that benefits the team, rather than one that favors one party over another.  

Establishing Clear Policies  

Having clear policies and procedures in place for conflict resolution can provide a framework for handling disputes effectively. These policies should outline the steps to be taken when a conflict arises, the roles and responsibilities of those involved, and the resources available for support. Regular training on these policies can ensure that all team members are equipped to handle conflicts constructively.  

Building a Positive Workplace Culture  

Finally, fostering a positive workplace culture can prevent many conflicts from arising in the first place. This involves promoting values such as respect, transparency, and collaboration. Regular team-building activities and opportunities for social interaction can strengthen relationships and build trust among team members. A culture that values diversity and inclusivity can also reduce conflicts by ensuring that everyone feels valued and understood.  

Conclusion  

Conflict resolution in the workplace is not just about solving problems; it's about strengthening team dynamics and fostering a culture of collaboration and respect. By understanding the root causes of conflict, promoting open communication, utilizing mediation, focusing on interests, encouraging collaborative problem-solving, establishing clear policies, and building a positive workplace culture, conflicts can be turned into opportunities for growth and innovation. When handled effectively, conflict can lead to stronger, more cohesive teams and a more productive work environment.  

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conflict resolution and problem solving

10 Leadership Conflict Management & Resolution Skills 2024

Being a leader in any organization is no easy task. Not only are leaders responsible for their actions, and the ramifications thereof, they are also responsible for the behavior and actions of their team members.

Running a team like a well-oiled machine is no easy task, as more often than not it doesn't run as well as a leader may like. There will be times that there will be conflict in the workplace, which could, if left unchecked, threaten to derail the productivity and profitability of the organization, and the morale of the team. This is where leadership conflict management and resolution skills for team leaders come to the fore.

They are qualities that set a good and a great leader apart. Success requires teamwork and clear communication. When leading a team, one of your primary responsibilities is making sure your team works well together and when it doesn't, you're able to resolve the conflict.

Often, individuals with varying personalities comprise these teams. The ability to recognize potential conflicts between individual team members and develop conflict resolution strategies to resolve them quickly is essential for projects to proceed successfully.

Leaders recognize that understanding conflict management can help them resolve issues before they occur or resolve existing conflicts in such a way that your team can still work together as a cohesive unit.

conflict management in leadership roles

10 Leadership Conflict Management & Resolution Skills

1. communicate early and often .

To reduce misunderstandings and ambiguity, communicate your intentions and desires to not just one party, but rather every employee and as such all parties involved in the work environment. Ask what your colleagues need to work their best, and do your part to meet their needs or – at a minimum – avoid doing that which you know will cause harm. If you suspect conflict amongst team members, a leader must nip it in the bud quickly as problems will not just disappear, but rather linger if not. Failing to act as a leader when you spot a potential problem can create problems down the line.

2. Listen actively

Active listening is a proven leadership skill for conflict resolution, and involves developing a skill for listening to what is verbally and nonverbally communicated. Often, conflicts arise because two parties misunderstand or mishear what the other person is saying. Leaders know how to manage conflict and understand that active listening helps ensure that the sender and receiver understand one another and can more easily move towards a resolution. This is half the battle when it comes to being a mediator in resolving conflicts.

3. Emotional intelligence

Emotional intelligence is the ability to perceive, manage, and control emotions not just in oneself, but also in others. Understanding, expressing, and effectively handling emotions are vital for conflict resolution. EI skills help improve communication and relationships and therefore is included in the vital skills for conflict resolution.

4. Problem solving

Problem-solving skills help leaders or parties in conflict recognize and address the root causes of conflicts by identifying the issues and exploring possible solutions. Leaders can apply the 5 problem-solving steps or 5 conflict management styles for conflict resolution: identify the problem, list possible solutions, evaluate the solutions, choose one solution, and implement it. People can find creative and equitable solutions to their conflicts by applying problem-solving skills.

5. Negotiation

Negotiation is trying to reach an agreement between two or more parties. It can be used to resolve disputes and every conflict and is integral to conflict resolution. Negotiation skills can be learned and practiced, and one can apply them in various situations. Therefore, it is vital to have effective negotiation skills to help achieve successful outcomes in any case. Negotiation is one of the powerful skills for conflict resolution, and it can help bring parties together to work toward a common goal. 

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6. Observation

Observation is the key to effective conflict management. When a leader observes a conflict, one can understand it better and find solutions that work for both parties. You must also be able to keep track of your emotions and reactions to remain impartial. The skills required to be a practical observer will vary depending on the type of conflict you are dealing with.

7. Self-awareness

Self-awareness helps you understand your thoughts, feelings, and behavior, enabling you to identify the underlying causes of conflicts. Once you thoroughly understand the source of conflict, you can begin resolving it using other conflict management skills and techniques. This vital skill also helps you in identifying any biases you might have as a manager.

8. Team awareness

A conflict resolution team is especially important for effective conflict resolution, and must have the skills to work together effectively. One of the skills that are essential for conflict resolution is team awareness. This skill helps managers understand their team dynamics and how they interact with each other. In addition, it can help resolve conflict before it escalates into a severe issue. Conflict occurs through any disagreement and can cause rifts, so team awareness helps a manager to make their teams work through their differences and reach a consensus on a solution.

9. Patience

Conflict can mean different things to different people, but what is universal is that resolving conflict is a challenging but essential part of any relationship. It can be frustrating when an argument escalates quickly to the point of no return. But patience is critical to resolving conflict successfully. Effective leadership means that the best leaders need to take their time and not rush into a decision. When one is trying to resolve a conflict, it helps to circle back and understand the other person’s point of view to effectively manage things and develop a solution that works for both parties. By listening carefully and taking time to think about the situation, you can diffuse tense situations and build trust between you and the other person. All in all, patience can be one of the key skills for conflict resolution.

10. Impartiality 

It is often difficult to stay impartial when you manage conflict, but in any conflict, a good manager should never take sides. Being impartial means that you can listen to both sides of the story and act accordingly. A problem at hand can't be resolved unless the historical issues are addressed. In this type of situation, it's best to separate the conflict from the people that are involved with it. Effective leaders understand that they shouldn't focus on people and their personal characteristics, instead, they should look at the problem and center their energy on finding a solution. 

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Conclusion 

Heavy is the head that wears the crown. Being a true leader is no easy task, and nor too is managing interpersonal or interdepartmental conflict within an organization. When it comes to conflict, being cool, calm, collected, impartial and able to see the wood for the trees, are skills every leader/manager worth their salt must posses or face the consequences of lost productivity and other knock-on effects that may also affect the profitability of the company. Many leaders know that their role in solving workplace conflict is to help employees involved in the conflict to clarify their needs and guide them to a fair solution that both sides will accept. All conflict situations can lead to division, so as part of the conflict resolution, be sure to address all types of different conflict right away; however, don't rush when it comes to working out a resolution.

Whilst many say that leaders are born and not made, what is apparent is that modern leaders can be coached at a university like Nexford , that offers BBA and MBA programs, on how to spot conflict early and develop ways of managing conflict in the workplace before things spiral out of control. Nexford's Leadership Management and Teams course focuses on how to create a personal and shared vision and communicate effectively with teams, as a leader, a manager and a team member. On the course learners will develop a personal philosophy of leadership, management and membership in the global workplace through a personal inventory and assessment, as well as apply conflict management skills to a personal and organizational setting. Complimenting that, Nexford's Leadership and Organizational Development course examines individual and group interaction and helps learners gain a deeper understanding of how human behavior drives organizational behavior and development. On the course learners will apply various leadership styles, conflict management strategies, and change models to organizational situations to resolve conflict at hand.

Discover how you can acquire the most in-demand skills that can help with managing conflict within the workplace with our free report. Download the free report  today!

conflict & leadership management

What is conflict management?

Conflict management is an umbrella term for the way we identify and handle conflicts fairly and efficiently and is necessary for managing diverse teams. The goal is to minimize the potential negative impacts that are involved in a conflict and can arise from disagreements and increase the odds of a positive outcome. 

What is a conflict management strategy?

Strategies for managing conflict are the ways a manager can engage with their employees productively when it seems like there is a risk of conflicts and arguments emerging. People naturally deal with conflicts in different ways, but some can be better than others when it comes to keeping everyone involved in the situation happy and productive. By combining your own natural conflict management style with any of the styles below, you can develop a range of responses to arguments and clashes in the workplace.

What types of conflict can occur in the workplace?

As no two days are ever the same, so too are the types of conflict that may occur in the office environment. Knowing how to spot them, and stop them early can help to resolve a conflict in double quick time. Experts maintain that there are 5 conflict types that occur in the workplace and they are leadership conflicts, work style conflicts, creative conflicts, personality conflicts, and task-based conflicts.

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Why is it crucial for a leader/employer to have conflict management skills?

Understanding conflict allows leaders to manage it more effectively and can provide a path to accomplishing positive outcomes. Conflict can lead to division, so every leader needs to understand that conflict management training can be an active force that will allow leaders grow healthy relationships within their organizations which can ultimately result in effective team work and productivity and make it easier to manage workplace disputes.

What does it take for a leader to resolve disputes in the workplace?

Depending on the situation, there are many skills and strategies leaders must look at for managing conflict and resolve disputes in the workplace. Leading from the front is just one and taking control of a situation before a molehill turns into a mountain. But if you had to put your finger on it, what exactly does it take for a leader to increase their resolution efforts and  resolve disputes in the workplace? Experts would maintain that as a leader, even though you can initiate a constructive conversation, the effort always involves dialogue and discussion among the people involved. Conflict is inevitable, but by adopting a positive attitude toward the conflict, leaders find the best in people and in the situation, and maintain their sense of humor. Sounds easy enough, but more often than that it isn't necessarily so.

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Mark Talmage-Rostron

Mark is a college graduate with Honours in Copywriting. He is the Content Marketing Manager at Nexford, creating engaging, thought-provoking, and action-oriented content.

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Effective communication skills: resolving conflicts .

Couple in conflict

Even the happiest of relationships experience conflicts and problems (Markman, Stanley, Blumberg, Jenkins & Whiteley, 2004). If handled well, issues provide opportunities for personal and relationship growth. There are many skills that can help individuals seeking to resolve conflicts in a healthy way. One of the greatest skills that aids in conflict resolution is effective communication.

Common Conflicts

Issues, or conflicts, in relationships consist of any situation, event or experience that is of concern or importance to those involved. A variety of factors lead to conflict, some of which include topics such as money, children, and in-laws, personal issues such as selfesteem, values, expectations, or goals, or relational issues such as the amount of together time versus alone time, support versus control, affection, and communication (Miller & Miller, 1997). While there are seemingly endless reasons for conflicts, they generally surround the underlying needs of all humans including physical, intellectual, emotional, social, and spiritual (Miller & Miller, 1997; Townsend, 2010). Most importantly, how we approach and communicate about these issues often determines the outcome.

Conflicts in Communication

Most people know that in order to resolve conflicts, we need to communicate about the issue; but negative patterns of communication can often lead to greater frustration and escalation of conflict. Consider the following communication challenges:

Body Language/Tone of Voice

Communication is more than the words we choose to use. In fact, our body language and tone of voice often speak louder than our words. For example, shouting “I’m not angry” is not a very convincing message! When we give an incongruent message where our tone of voice and body language does not match our message, confusion and frustration often follow (Gottman & DeClaire, 2001). In order to overcome this communication challenge, we need to be aware of what messages our body language and tone of voice may be sending others. Speak calmly, give eye contact, smile when appropriate, and maintain an open and relaxed posture (Paterson, 2000).

Differences in Style

Each of us has a unique way of communicating, often based on our family experiences, culture, gender and many other factors (Markman et al., 2004; Miller & Miller, 1997). For example, we may tend to be more loud, outgoing, or emotional when compared to our partner. While there is no right or wrong style, our past experiences often lead to expectations that are not usually verbally communicated with others, which can cause tension and misunderstandings in relationships. For example, if we came from a large family that tended to shout in order to be heard, we may think that speaking loudly is normal. But if our partner came from a calmer family environment, he/she may be uncomfortable or even frightened by a raised voice (Markman et al., 2004).

Discussing our backgrounds and perceptions can help to clarify expectations to ourselves and others and can also help our partner to understand our point of view. Knowing this information can often help in the problem solving process.

Communication Roadblocks

Communication roadblocks occur when two people talk in such a way that neither one feels understood. Research has found four particularly negative styles of communication, often referred to as the “four horsemen of the apocalypse,” (Gottman, 1999, p.27) because if left unchecked, these styles of interaction can eventually become lethal to relationships. These styles are criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling (Gottman, 1999).

  • Criticism attacks the character or personality of another. While it is normal to have complaints about another’s specific actions, it is very different to put them down as a person because of those actions. For example, a complaint might be, “I felt worried when you did not call to tell me that you were going to be home late.” A criticism in the same situation would be expressed as “You are so inconsiderate, you never call me when you are going to be late.” Critiques focus on certain behaviors; criticism negatively focuses on the person’s intentions and character.
  • Contempt portrays disgust and a lack of respect for the other person through body language, such as eye rolling or sneering, or by name calling, sarcasm and cutting remarks.
  • Defensiveness is a seemingly understandable reaction that individuals take to criticism and contempt; however, it often escalates the conflict. When we are defensive, we tend to stop listening to the other’s viewpoint and communication is shut down.
  • Stonewalling is withdrawing from communication and refusing to engage in discussion. In other words, it is the adult version of the “silent treatment” that young children utilize when they are upset. Conflict resolution is impossible without communication!

Some additional examples of communication roadblocks include (Miller & Miller, 1997):

  • Ordering (“Stop complaining!”)
  • Warning (“If you do that, you’ll be sorry.”)
  • Preaching (“You shouldn’t act like that.”)
  • Advising (“Just wait a couple of years before deciding.”)
  • Lecturing (“If you do this now, you won’t grow up to be a responsible adult.”)
  • Agreeing, just to keep the peace (“I think you’re right.”)
  • Ridiculing (“OK, little baby.”)
  • Interpreting (“You don’t really believe that.”)
  • Sympathizing (“Don’t worry, it’ll all work out.”)
  • Questioning (“Who put that idea into your head?”)
  • Diverting (“Let’s talk about something more pleasant.”)

Communication roadblocks are very common; however, they do not promote healthy conflict resolution and often lead to escalation of the conflict. Recognizing these roadblocks and making efforts to effectively communicate can help individuals overcome roadblocks.

Tips to Resolve Conflict

Soften the startup.

One of the skills to overcome communication roadblocks includes a soft startup to the conversation by starting with something positive, expressing appreciation, focusing on problems one at a time and taking responsibility for thoughts and feelings (Gottman, 1999; Gottman & Declaire, 2001; Patterson, 2000). In addition, when expressing the problem, starting the message with “I” instead of “You” can decrease defensiveness and promote positive interactions with others (Darrington & Brower, 2012). For example, “I want to stay more involved in making decisions about money” rather than “You never include me in financial decisions.”

Make and Receive Repair Attempts.

Another important skill in overcoming communication roadblocks is learning to make and receive repair attempts (Gottman, 1999). Repair attempts are efforts to keep an increasingly negative interaction from going any further by taking a break or making efforts to calm the situation. This is important because when conflicts arise, we often experience intense emotional and physical stress that can impact our ability to think and reason, which can lead to communication roadblocks (Gottman & DeClaire, 2001). Taking time away from the conflict (at least 20 minutes) to calm down can help us be more prepared to discuss the issue (Gottman, 1999; Gottman & DeClaire, 2001; Markman et al, 2004).

Effective Speaking and Listening Skills

Overcoming communication roadblocks requires effective speaking and listening skills. Markman, Stanley and Blumberg (2010) share what they call the “speaker-listener” technique to help individuals more effectively communicate. Each partner takes turns being the speaker and the listener.    

The rules for the speaker include (Markman et al., 2004; Markman, Stanley & Blumberg, 2010):

  • The speaker should share his/her own thoughts, feelings and concerns—not what he/she thinks the listener’s concerns are.
  • Use “I” statements when speaking to accurately express thoughts and feelings.
  • Keep statements short, to ensure the listener does not get overwhelmed with information.
  • Stop after each short statement so that the listener can paraphrase, or repeat back in his/her own words, what was said to ensure he/she understands. If the paraphrase is not quite right, gently rephrase the statement again to help the listener understand.

The rules for the listener include:

  • Paraphrase what the speaker is saying. If unclear, ask for clarification. Continue until the speaker indicates the message was received correctly.
  • Don’t argue or give opinion about what the speaker says—wait to do this until you are the speaker, and then do so in a respectful manner.
  • While the speaker is talking, the listener should not talk or interrupt except to paraphrase after the speaker.

The speaker and listener should take turns in each role so that each has a chance to express his/her thoughts and feelings. Either can call for a time out at any time. The goal of this activity is not to solve a particular problem, but rather to have a safe and meaningful discussion and to understand each other’s point of view. While we may not always agree with the other’s point of view, understanding and validating other’s thoughts and feelings can improve relationships and help us build on common ground, which may lead to more effective negotiation and problem resolution (Gottman, 1999).

Dealing with conflict can take varying amounts of mental, emotional, and physical energy (Miller & Miller, 1997). It can be work! However, learning and implementing a few simple communication skills can increase positive interactions with others. The opportunities for personal and relationship growth are well worth the effort.

For more information or for classes and workshops:

  • Go to http://strongermarriage.org for tips, articles, and to find relationship education classes near you.
  • Check out your local Extension office for relationship education classes and events. 
  • Darrington, J., & Brower, N. (2012). Effective communication skills: “I” messages and beyond. Utah State University Extension. https://extension.usu.edu/htm/publications/publi cation=14541
  • Gottman, J. M., & DeClaire, J. (2001). The relationship cure: A 5 step guide to strengthening your marriage, family, and friendships. New York, NY: Three Rivers Press.
  • Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (1999). The seven principles for making marriage work. New York, NY: Three Rivers Press.
  • Markman, H. J., Stanley, S. M., & Blumberg, S. L. (2010). Fighting for your marriage. San Francisco: Jossey Bass.
  • Markman, H. J, Stanley, S. M., Blumberg, S. L., Jenkins, N. H., & Whiteley, C. (2004). 12 hours to a great marriage: A step-by-step guide for making love last. San Francisco: Jossey Bass.
  • Miller, S., & Miller, P. A. (1997). Core communication: Skills and processes. Evergreen, Co: Interpersonal Communication Programs, Inc.
  • Paterson, R. J. (2000). The assertiveness workbook: How to express your ideas and stand up for yourself at work and in relationships. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger, Inc.
  • Townsend, M. (2010). Starved stuff: Feeding the 7 basic needs of healthy relationships. Townsend Relationship Center.

Naomi Brower,  MFHD, CFLE, Extension Assistant Professor; Jana Darrington,  MS, Extension Assistant Professor

Naomi Brower

Naomi Brower

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Conflict Resolution: Skills, Definition and Examples

14 min read · Updated on June 08, 2023

Marsha Hebert

Master the art of conflict resolution and unlock the key to harmonious workplaces

In today's fast-paced and dynamic work environments, conflicts are bound to arise. Whether it's a difference in opinions, clashing personalities, or opposing interests, conflicts can disrupt productivity, strain relationships, and create a negative atmosphere. That's where conflict resolution skills come into play.

You can use the conflict resolution examples in this article to learn how to address and resolve disagreements, disputes, and tensions in a constructive and mutually beneficial manner. It involves employing a set of essential skills that enable individuals to navigate conflicts, find common ground, and reach satisfactory resolutions. These skills encompass active listening, effective communication, emotional intelligence, and problem-solving.

In the following sections, we'll delve deeper into the key skills for resolving conflicts, explore the three Cs of conflict resolution, discuss the main conflict resolution skills, and provide practical tips and techniques to enhance your conflict resolution repertoire. 

Let's unlock the power of conflict resolution and pave the way for a more cohesive and successful workplace.

Understanding the importance of conflict resolution

Possessing strong conflict resolution skills is more than just a valuable asset in the workplace; it's a necessity for fostering healthy relationships, teamwork, and a positive organizational culture. When conflicts are effectively managed, teams can maintain focus, collaborate more efficiently, and achieve their goals with greater synergy.

One of the primary benefits of honing conflict resolution skills is the ability to prevent conflicts from escalating into larger, more disruptive issues. By addressing conflicts early on and with finesse, individuals can nip potential problems in the bud and maintain a harmonious work environment. Strong conflict resolution skills also foster open lines of communication, trust, and respect among team members, enhancing overall morale and job satisfaction.

Furthermore, possessing these skills enables individuals to navigate challenging conversations and delicate situations with confidence, poise, and empathy. It allows for the development of creative solutions and win-win outcomes, where both parties feel heard and their needs are met.

Conflict Resolution Skills Definition

Conflict resolution skills are vital tools for navigating professional settings. They are defined as skills that enable peaceful outcomes to disputes. These skills involve various strategies and techniques aimed at finding common ground, promoting effective communication, and achieving mutually beneficial resolutions. By developing these skills, you can proactively manage conflicts, prevent escalation, and cultivate a positive work environment.

What are conflict resolution skills?

Skill 1: active listening.

One of the best examples of conflict resolution skills is active listening. It involves fully engaging with the speaker, not only hearing their words but also understanding their underlying emotions and concerns. By attentively listening, you  demonstrate empathy , respect, and a genuine desire to comprehend the other person's perspective.

In conflict situations, active listening helps to de-escalate tension and foster open communication. Practice active listening by:

Maintaining eye contact

Nodding to show understanding

Paraphrasing or summarizing the speaker's points

These techniques ensure that both parties feel heard and valued, laying the groundwork for constructive dialogue and resolution.

Skill 2: Effective communication

Effective communication is essential for resolving conflicts. It encompasses both verbal and non-verbal forms of expression. Clear and  assertive communication  helps to convey your thoughts, needs, and concerns while also encouraging others to express themselves openly.

To improve communication skills in conflict situations, it's crucial to be mindful of your tone and body language. Choose your words carefully, avoiding confrontational or accusatory language. Be attentive to  non-verbal  cues, such as facial expressions and gestures, as they can significantly impact how your message is received.

Skill 3: Emotional intelligence

Emotional intelligence plays a vital role in conflict resolution. It involves recognizing, understanding, and managing emotions - both your own and those of others. By developing emotional intelligence, you can navigate conflicts with empathy, self-awareness, and self-control.

In conflict situations, emotional intelligence allows you to regulate your emotions, preventing impulsive reactions that may escalate tensions. It also enables you to understand the underlying emotions of others, fostering empathy and facilitating a more compassionate approach to conflict resolution.

One of the best things you can do to  enhance emotional intelligence  in conflicts is to practice self-reflection and self-awareness. Take a moment to identify your emotions and understand their impact on your behavior. Cultivate empathy by putting yourself in the other person's shoes, considering their perspective, and acknowledging their feelings.

Skill 4: Problem solving and collaboration

Problem solving and collaboration are crucial skills for resolving conflicts effectively. By adopting a collaborative approach, you shift the focus from "winning" the argument to finding mutually beneficial solutions.

In conflict resolution, problem solving techniques such as brainstorming, identifying common goals, and exploring alternative options can help to break down barriers and encourage collaboration. Foster an environment of open dialogue, where individuals feel comfortable sharing ideas and working together towards a resolution.

Additionally, fostering collaboration involves promoting active participation, valuing diverse viewpoints, and encouraging compromise. When people work together to solve problems, conflicts can be transformed into opportunities for growth, innovation, and strengthened relationships.

The three Cs of conflict resolution

Possessing these skills leads directly to the three Cs - calmness (sometimes referred to as composure), communication, and compromise. Understanding and employing the three Cs of conflict resolution can help you to achieve mutually agreeable solutions. 

C - Calmness

Maintaining calmness during conflicts is essential for productive resolution. When emotions run high, it becomes difficult to think clearly and communicate effectively. By staying calm and composed, you create a conducive environment for constructive dialogue and problem-solving.

Techniques for staying calm and composed in tense situations include:

Taking deep breaths: Deep breathing helps to regulate your body's stress response, allowing you to stay centered and focused

Practicing mindfulness: By bringing your attention to the present moment, mindfulness helps you to detach from strong emotions and approach conflicts with greater clarity

Using self-soothing techniques: Engage in activities that help you to relax and reduce stress, such as going for a walk, listening to calming music, or practicing meditation

C - Communication

Effective communication is the backbone of conflict resolution. It involves expressing yourself clearly, actively listening to others, and promoting understanding.

Practical tips for communicating constructively during conflicts include:

Using "I" statements: Express your feelings, thoughts, and needs using "I" statements to avoid sounding accusatory or confrontational. For example, say, "I feel frustrated when..." instead of "You always..."

Practicing active listening: Give your full attention to the speaker, maintain eye contact, and avoid interrupting. Show empathy by acknowledging their feelings and summarizing their points to ensure accurate understanding.

Seeking clarification: If something is unclear, ask open-ended questions to gather more information and promote deeper understanding. This demonstrates your genuine interest in resolving the conflict.

C - Compromise

Compromise is a crucial element of conflict resolution, as it involves finding solutions that satisfy the needs and interests of all parties involved.

To achieve an effective compromise, consider the following guidance:

Identify common ground: Look for shared interests or goals that can serve as a foundation for finding a middle ground. Focus on areas where you can work together to find a solution that addresses everyone's concerns.

Practice active problem-solving: Collaborate with the other party to brainstorm creative solutions. Encourage the exploration of alternatives and evaluate the pros and cons of each option.

Be willing to give and take: Recognize that compromise requires flexibility and a willingness to make concessions. Strive for a solution that may not be perfect but meets the core needs of both parties.

Remember, compromise does not mean surrendering or sacrificing your values. Instead, it involves finding a balance that allows for progress and resolution while respecting the perspectives and needs of all involved.

In the next section, we explore the five main conflict resolution strategies, expanding your repertoire of tools for resolving conflicts in the workplace.

Main conflict resolution strategies

Conflicts in the workplace can vary in complexity and intensity. To effectively resolve conflicts, it is important to have a repertoire of strategies at your disposal. Here, we will explore the five main conflict resolution strategies, providing you with valuable tools to navigate conflicts and promote positive outcomes.

Strategy 1: Collaborative problem solving

Collaborative problem solving is a strategy that emphasizes teamwork, open communication, and the active involvement of all parties in finding a resolution. This approach promotes a cooperative atmosphere and encourages the exploration of mutually beneficial solutions.

Steps and examples for implementing this strategy include:

Identify the problem: Clearly define the underlying issue and ensure all parties have a shared understanding of the conflict

Generate alternative solutions: Brainstorm possible solutions together, encouraging creativity and a free exchange of ideas - consider both individual and collective interests

Evaluate options: Assess the pros and cons of each proposed solution, considering the impact on all parties involved; aim for solutions that address the core needs and concerns of everyone

Collaborate on decision-making: Select the solution that best meets the shared interests and goals identified during the process. Strive for consensus or a general agreement that everyone can accept

For example, imagine your team is experiencing conflicts over project timelines. By engaging in collaborative problem solving, team members can openly discuss their concerns, propose adjustments to deadlines, and collectively decide on a revised timeline that considers individual workloads and priorities.

Strategy 2: Compromise and negotiation

Compromise and negotiation are strategies that involve finding a middle ground and reaching agreement. These strategies require flexibility, effective communication, and a willingness to give and take.

Principles and techniques for implementing compromise and negotiation strategies include:

Identify shared goals: Focus on common interests and seek outcomes that align with the overarching objectives of the organization or team

Prioritize needs: Understand the core needs of each party and explore potential trade-offs that can address those needs to a reasonable extent

Explore alternative solutions: Encourage open dialogue to generate creative options that accommodate different perspectives and preferences

Seek win-win solutions: Aim for outcomes that result in mutual gains, rather than one party prevailing over the other - this approach fosters cooperation and strengthens relationships

For instance, imagine two departments in your organization disagree on the allocation of resources. Through compromise and negotiation, they can engage in constructive discussions, explore different resource distribution models, and eventually reach an agreement that balances the needs and priorities of both departments.

Strategy 3: Assertiveness 

Assertiveness is an important skill in conflict resolution. It involves expressing your thoughts, needs, and concerns in a clear and respectful manner while actively listening to others. Assertive communication promotes understanding, prevents miscommunication, and fosters productive dialogue.

Tips for assertive communication include:

Use clear and direct language: State your points in a concise and straightforward manner, avoiding ambiguity or vagueness

Maintain composure: Stay calm and composed, even when faced with challenging or confrontational behavior; respond rather than react, and focus on the issues at hand

Actively listen: Give others the opportunity to express their viewpoints fully, demonstrating respect and genuine interest; paraphrase and summarize their points to ensure accurate understanding

Strive for mutually beneficial solutions: Look for solutions that meet everyone's needs, promoting mutual understanding and cooperation

By practicing assertiveness, conflicts can be addressed head-on, enabling effective problem-solving and resolution.

Strategy 4: Avoidance and accommodation

In certain situations,  avoidance or accommodation  may be appropriate conflict resolution strategies. However, it's important to note that these strategies are most effective when used selectively and judiciously.

When considering avoidance or accommodation, keep the following in mind:

Timing is crucial: Sometimes, conflicts may be best resolved by allowing emotions to cool down before engaging in discussions; temporary avoidance can prevent further escalation

Relationship preservation: Accommodation can be useful when the relationship between parties is of the utmost importance and maintaining harmony takes precedence over personal desires

Potential drawbacks: Overuse of avoidance or accommodation can lead to unresolved conflicts, resentment, or a lack of assertiveness, which may hinder long-term productivity and satisfaction

Remember, while avoidance and accommodation can be useful in specific circumstances, they should not be relied upon as the primary means of conflict resolution.

Strategy 5: Mediation and facilitation

Mediation and facilitation involve the assistance of a neutral third party to guide the conflict resolution process. Mediators or facilitators help to enable open dialogue, maintain a balanced discussion, and foster a cooperative atmosphere.

Key aspects of mediation and facilitation in conflict resolution include:

Neutral and impartial guidance: The mediator or facilitator ensures a fair process by allowing all parties to express their concerns and viewpoints without bias

Active listening and reframing: The mediator or facilitator actively listens to each party, paraphrases their statements, and reframes them to promote understanding and perspective-taking

Encouraging cooperation: The mediator or facilitator helps parties to explore common ground, identify shared interests, and find mutually acceptable solutions.

Ensuring follow-through: After an agreement is reached, the mediator or facilitator may assist in establishing a plan of action and monitoring its implementation.

Mediation and facilitation can be particularly useful in complex or deeply entrenched conflicts, where the involvement of a neutral third party can facilitate resolution and improve relationships among parties.

Additional tips and techniques for conflict resolution

As you might have guessed, there are far more options to explore in managing conflicts. The five in the previous section were just the tip of the iceberg. There are various tips, practices, and techniques that can further enhance your conflict resolution skills. By incorporating these approaches into your conflict resolution toolkit you can navigate conflicts more effectively and foster positive outcomes, so it's time to refine those skills and contribute to a more harmonious and productive work environment. 

Separate people from the problem: Focus on the issue at hand rather than personalizing the conflict. By separating people from the problem, you can approach conflict resolution more objectively.

Foster a culture of feedback: Create an environment where feedback is valued and encouraged. Constructive feedback can address conflicts early on and prevent them from escalating.

Continuously learn and improve: Conflict resolution is a skill that can be honed over time. Seek opportunities for  professional development , attend workshops or training programs, and learn from real-world experiences.

Your conflict resolution journey

Congratulations! You've embarked on a journey to unlock the power of conflict resolution and forge a path toward a workplace that thrives on harmony and fosters resounding success. In this article, we've delved into the definition of conflict resolution, looked at key skills and examples, and recognized its importance in professional settings.

By developing strong conflict resolution skills, you're not only enhancing your ability to navigate conflicts effectively but are also becoming a steward of your own career progression. The value of these skills extends far beyond resolving individual conflicts; they empower you to excel as a professional, a team player, and a leader.

Moreover, by employing various conflict resolution strategies you become equipped with a diverse toolkit to address conflicts proactively and constructively.

Remember, conflict is a natural part of human interaction, but how we handle and resolve it sets us apart. By continuously honing your conflict resolution skills, seeking win-win solutions, and embracing a culture of open communication, you will not only enhance your professional growth but also contribute to a happier work environment.

So, embrace the challenges that conflict presents as opportunities for growth. View conflict resolution as a skill set that empowers you to navigate through obstacles, build stronger relationships, and drive success. By becoming a master of conflict resolution, you are taking charge of your own career progression and setting a shining example for others to follow.

Now, go forth with confidence, armed with the knowledge and skills to transform conflicts into stepping stones toward your professional success!

Make sure that your exceptional conflict resolution skills are shining through on your resume by taking advantage of our  free resume review !

Recommended reading:

Interpersonal Conflict: How to Manage it and Learn From it

Leverage People Skills to Improve Your Employability and Career Success

What Are Soft Skills? And How to Showcase Them on Your Resume

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What Your Conflict Resolution Style Says About You and Is It Healthy?

Better conflict resolution skills can improve your relationships

Rachael is a New York-based writer and freelance writer for Verywell Mind, where she leverages her decades of personal experience with and research on mental illness—particularly ADHD and depression—to help readers better understand how their mind works and how to manage their mental health.

conflict resolution and problem solving

Dr. Sabrina Romanoff, PsyD, is a licensed clinical psychologist and a professor at Yeshiva University’s clinical psychology doctoral program.

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The Five Conflict Resolution Styles

Common types of conflict in relationships, how to determine your conflict resolution style, how to improve your conflict resolution skills, can a relationship work if you have different conflict resolution styles.

The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI), one of the most widely-used models of conflict management, identifies five conflict resolution styles: competing, avoiding, collaborating, accommodating, and compromising.

While each style can be appropriate to different situations, a collaborating style is generally the healthiest for relationships because it emphasizes a team-oriented approach to finding a solution that satisfies both partners. By the same token, a competing style often puts excess strain on a relationship because it pits one partner against the other with the assumption that only one can win.

Research suggests that conflict resolution style has an even bigger impact on the strength and longevity of a relationship than the kind of conflicts or frequency of conflict. In other words, how you fight matters more than how often you fight or what you fight about.

Read on to learn more about each conflict resolution style, how to figure out your style, how that can impact your relationships, and how to develop a healthier conflict resolution style.

The five conflict resolution styles described by the TKI are positioned along a spectrum of cooperativeness and assertiveness .

Cooperativeness refers to the extent to which a person tries to understand and satisfy their partner’s concerns. Assertiveness, meanwhile, refers to the extent to which a person seeks to satisfy their own concerns.

A style leaning too far to either extreme can be unhealthy. For example, people who are too assertive and make no effort at all to satisfy their partner’s concerns can end up making that partner feel uncared for and, ultimately, unfulfilled in the relationship. But people who are too cooperative and refuse to assert themselves at all can end up creating a similar relationship dynamic, where one partner always gets their needs met and the other never does.

  • Competing : This style approaches the conflict as if it’s a battle of wills where one person will win and one will lose. It’s less about solving the problem and more about figuring out which person gets to have their way this time. Eventually, this can erode the very foundation of the relationship as partners increasingly view each other as competitors battling for control over the relationship.
  • Avoiding : This style tries to pretend the conflict doesn’t exist. Avoidance is usually done out of fear that the conflict could hurt or even end the relationship. But it’s not a long-term solution because you can’t solve a problem if you refuse to confront it. This, too, can erode the relationship as the unresolved problem puts strain on it and becomes harder to ignore.
  • Collaborating : A collaborating couple treats conflicts as an “us versus the problem” situation. Rather than competing against each other, they work as a team to figure out a solution to the problem where both partners win. It leads to the best outcomes, but it also takes the most energy, patience, and empathy , especially when the problem doesn’t have an obvious win-win solution.
  • Accommodating : One partner chooses to neglect their own needs or concerns for the sake of keeping the peace. For relatively small issues, like where to go for dinner, that might be fine. But for bigger issues, it’s not a long-term solution because it only “solves” the problem for the partner whose needs were accommodated. The one doing the accommodating will still feel like the issue isn’t resolved.
  • Compromising : A compromise is a middle ground between two opposing sides. It still positions the partners as competitors, but instead of fighting for victory, they negotiate a solution that’s acceptable to both. Rather than win-win, it’s more often a draw where each side is left only partially satisfied. For tricky issues where there just isn’t a win-win, compromise is a good alternative. But when couples rely too much on compromise, both partners can end up feeling like they’re sacrificing too much for the sake of the relationship.

Conflict is normal in every relationship. The more two people try to build a life together, the more they will confront differences in views and expectations as they navigate the logistics of combining finances, sharing responsibilities, and agreeing on what they want for their future together.

  • Financial disagreements . Couples can often get into disagreements about how to balance saving for the future with paying for the lifestyle they want right now. Others will disagree about how to share financial responsibilities.
  • Parenting disagreements . Differing views on discipline, nutrition, education, and division of parenting labor can all be tough conflicts to navigate.
  • Division of household labor . People might have different standards of cleanliness that are hard to combine. In other cases, one person might end up carrying more weight than the other.
  • Intimacy . This refers to sex as well as other kinds of emotional and physical intimacy like cuddling, spending quality time together, and expressing your love and appreciation for each other. While it’s natural for intimacy to fluctuate over the course of a relationship, conflict can arise when one or both of you start to feel less loved than they used to at other points in the relationship.

Facing conflict in a relationship is not a sign of failure, but how you navigate that conflict can have serious consequences for the health of your relationship.

To figure out which style you tend to use in conflicts, it helps to see each one in a real-world context.

How People With Varying Conflict Resolutions May Respond to Conflict

Consider this real-world scenario to figure out your conflict resolution style.

Picture a couple with a teenage daughter. While she used to get a good mix of As and Bs on her report cards in the past, it’s shifted to a mix of mostly Cs with a few Bs now that she’s in high school.

The first parent wants to discipline the daughter when she comes with her latest report card of mostly Cs. The lower grades are going to make it hard to get into a decent college and have a bright future. The second parent thinks discipline is uncalled for. Cs are still passing grades. As long as she’s passing her classes, she should be given some room to live her own life.

Now, put yourself in this situation and consider how you would respond. After, you've decided how you think you might respond, read ahead to see which style best matches your response.

  • A competing parent would continue to rehash their own point of view, either refuting or dismissing any counterpoints or concerns brought up by the other parent. They’ll continue arguing until one gives in or they both get exhausted and temporarily drop the issue without resolving it.
  • An avoiding parent would ignore the topic altogether. The second parent might hide the report card, for example, hoping the first parent doesn’t find it so they don’t have to confront the issue.
  • An accommodating parent would just let the other one do what they think is best. The first parent might just drop the issue as soon as they encountered any pushback from their partner.
  • A compromising parent would try to find a middle ground. Perhaps they settle on not punishing her this time, but sitting her down for a serious discussion and a warning that she will be punished if her future report cards don’t improve.
  • A collaborating parent would look for a solution that addressed the concerns of both parents. That might look like sitting their daughter down to ask her about school and her plans for the future. The parents can uncover any struggles she might be dealing with that are causing the declining grades or else work with her to figure out what she wants for her future and what kind of grades she’ll need to achieve that. That way, the first parent can leave satisfied that they’re helping their daughter achieve the goals she has for herself while the second parent is satisfied that they’re not placing undue pressure on her.

Conflicts are difficult by definition, so don’t beat yourself up if you aren’t great at resolving them.

Conflict Resolution Tips

Follow these tips to improve your conflict resolution skills:

  • Forgive each other and start with a fresh slate . If your conflict resolution styles were unhealthy in the past, it’s easy to go into future conflicts expecting the same unhealthy dynamic to emerge. That expectation can become a self-fulfilling prophecy if you lean on old defensive habits that trigger your partner to fall back into their own old habits. So you both need to agree to forgive the past hurt and be patient and forgiving with each other as you work on developing a healthier conflict resolution style.
  • Listen and repeat . Don’t interrupt each other when you’re talking. In addition to letting the other person finish speaking, start your response by recapping what they said to confirm that you understood them.
  • Hold back judgment . If you feel the other person’s concerns are overblown or unimportant, keep it to yourself. Both of you need to be able to talk openly about your thoughts and feelings without worrying that they’ll just be dismissed.
  • Treat it like a brainstorming session, not an argument . Each of you will throw out solutions that the other person doesn’t like. Instead of judging it, focus on addressing the elements of the plan that don’t work and suggesting alternatives.
  • Brainstorm with empathy. Instead of focusing only on your needs, focus on ways to incorporate your partner’s concerns into the solution you’re proposing. Even if those concerns aren’t as important to you, you can still look for ways to tweak your original idea to address them. Your partner should do the same.

You don’t need to have matching styles to maintain a healthy relationship. However, it’s still important to find balance in how you resolve conflicts. If one partner has a competing style while the other has an accommodating style, for example, it’s easy for the relationship to become extremely one-sided, with the competing partner often getting their way.

It's important to find balance in how you resolve conflicts.

If you feel like you and your partner struggle to really resolve conflicts or it’s become one-sided , couples therapy can help you develop a better approach.

How a Couples Therapist Can Help

Therapists that specialize in couples counseling can be great at diagnosing where the miscommunication is happening and helping a couple practice healthier conflict resolution strategies.

Frequently Asked Questions

In general, it should be collaborative. A healthy relationship is one that fulfills both partners, which means both partners need to find the balance between asserting their own needs and meeting the needs of their partner.

If the problem will impact the relationship or either person’s future happiness, then yes. When you confront a major conflict, you either need to find a way forward that satisfies both of you or acknowledge that this might be a sign of incompatibility.

If you don’t have much practice with healthy conflict resolution, it can be hard to tell the difference between fundamental incompatibility and just lacking the skills to find a good resolution.

A couple’s therapist can help you navigate this situation and help both of you develop healthier conflict-resolution styles. 

Smaller conflicts about general annoyances and pet peeves, however, do not always need to be discussed. But if something bothers you or hurts your feelings, it's certainly worth bringing up.

Mossanen M, Johnston SS, Green J, Joyner BD. A practical approach to conflict management for program directors . Journal of Graduate Medical Education. 2014;6(2):345-346. Doi:10.4300/JGME-D-14-00175.1

Noller P, Feeney JA. Communication in early marriage: responses to conflict, nonverbal accuracy, and conversational patterns . In: Bradbury TN, ed. The Developmental Course of Marital Dysfunction. 1st ed. Cambridge University Press; 1998:11-43. Doi:10.1017/CBO9780511527814.003

By Rachael Green Rachael is a New York-based writer and freelance writer for Verywell Mind, where she leverages her decades of personal experience with and research on mental illness—particularly ADHD and depression—to help readers better understand how their mind works and how to manage their mental health.

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5 Conflict Resolution Techniques in Project Management

Fahad Usmani, PMP

July 24, 2022

conflict resolution techniques

Today we will discuss the five conflict resolution techniques we use in project management to resolve conflict.

These techniques are universal to any type of workplace. 

However, in project management, the work environment is dynamic and stressful, unlike the functional environment. Conflicts are common occurrences. If you are managing projects , you know how important it is to manage conflicts, and that is why you should understand conflict resolution techniques. 

Conflict Resolution Techniques

Conflict can occur when two or more stakeholders have different opinions or interests. 

Schedule priorities, scarce resources, technical reasons, and personal issues can all cause clashes. According to the American Management Association, managers manage conflicts 24% of their time.

Don’t panic; the situation is usually not as bad as you think. Resolving conflicts appropriately can build trust and sometimes bring new ideas and opportunities. This can make the difference between a positive and negative outcome.

If you don’t solve the conflict, your team members will lose trust. It will weaken your position as a project manager and the ability of your team to bond, which may affect your project’s success. You must deal with conflict before it is beyond resolution.

The following are a few consequences of improper conflict management:

  • Low team morale
  • Negative impact on the project manager’s authority
  • Increased number of personal clashes
  • Low productivity and efficiency
  • Low-quality work

If required, project managers must monitor and resolve conflicts as quickly as possible to keep them from becoming bigger issues.

Now, we will talk about conflict resolution techniques.

This blog follows the PMI guidelines and PMBOK Guide. Here are the five techniques:

  • Withdraw/Avoid
  • Smooth/Accommodate
  • Compromise/Reconcile
  • Force/Direct
  • Collaborate/Problem Solve

These conflict management strategies are also known as Thomas-Kilmann’s five approaches to resolving conflict.

Let’s discuss each technique in detail.

#1. Withdraw of Avoid

withdraw or avoid

In this conflict resolution technique, you avoid the conflict or retreat and allow the conflict to resolve itself. This is for when stakes are low, and the conflict is likely to disappear on its own.

Use this technique in the following cases:

  • Individuals involved in the conflict are not influential stakeholders.
  • The issue does not require a time investment.
  • An intense argument has already happened, and the individuals need time to cool off.
  • You do not have enough information to pursue other techniques.

This technique saves time that you can invest elsewhere. It is a good conflict management strategy to apply to low-level disagreements and gives you enough time to prepare if the conflict re-emerges.

Disadvantages

Withdrawing or avoiding is not really a resolution, does not resolve a conflict, and may weaken your position because parties may assume you have an unfair bias. Team members may think you are lacking skills or are not authoritative.

Many experts don’t consider this technique as a conflict management strategy because avoiding and escaping is not a solution.

#2. Smooth or Accommodate

smooth or accomodate

In this conflict resolution strategy, you find areas of agreement, try to smooth out the situation, and circumvent tough discussions.

The smoothing technique gives more consideration to one party than the other. You downplay the seriousness and behave as if the conflict never existed.

This technique is helpful in the following cases:

  • You don’t have time to deal with it.
  • You require a temporary solution to the problem.
  • The conflict is minor and involves less influential stakeholders.

This conflict resolution strategy does not require much effort. You can focus on essential issues by ignoring unimportant arguments. Situations can be potentially handled simply while bringing harmony, creating goodwill, and providing enough time to find a permanent solution.

If you fail to bring a balanced approach, one party may take advantage since you are giving them more consideration. Other parties not being accommodated may question your authority or stop reporting conflicts.

This conflict resolution strategy is not recommended as it often weakens the project manager’s authority.

#3. Compromise or Reconcile

compromise or reconcile

In this conflict management strategy, you take suggestions from both sides and partially satisfy them. This technique is useful when the stakeholders involved hold equal power.

You may use this technique in the following cases:

  • All parties involved need to win
  • When you have an equal relationship with both parties
  • Collaborative and forcing techniques have failed
  • When you need a temporary solution 

This technique brings quick results, lowers stress, and keeps all parties placated until you can find a permanent solution. You can cool off and revisit the situation later.

This conflict management technique does not generate trust in the long run; all parties remain unsatisfied, and the conflict could resurface at any time. Morals are not being strengthened. You may have to ensure all parties abide by the agreement.

#4. Force or Direct

force or direct

In this conflict management strategy, you agree with one party’s viewpoint and enforce their wishes. This is a win-lose situation and risks demoralizing the team.

You can use this conflict resolution technique in the following cases:

  • When you need a quick solution
  • When you know that one party is right
  • You do not have time to investigate
  • When the conflict is not very important
  • When the relationship with stakeholders is not essential

This technique provides a quick solution. It requires almost no effort from the project manager and may help establish their authority.

Using this technique may cause a negative impression on you. You may lose opportunities gained from the opposing party’s viewpoint. You cannot apply this technique with powerful stakeholders. It may backfire and worsen the conflict.

#5. Collaborate or Problem Solve

collaborate or problem solve

In a collaborative conflict resolution strategy, you discuss the issue with all parties and agree on a solution while considering multiple viewpoints.

  • When incorporating multiple views
  • If influential stakeholders are involved
  • When a consensus is required
  • If you want to distribute responsibility 

This is a real problem-solving technique that provides a solution to the conflict. It brings consensus, commitment, and shared responsibility for the outcome. This technique creates a win-win situation, builds your team’s confidence, earns respect, and establishes your authority.

You cannot use this technique when you need a quick solution because it takes time and effort. It is generally used for conflicts that may affect your project, not all issues.

Which Conflict Resolution Technique Should I Use?

The PMI does not recommend using any specific technique for all conflicts; it depends on the situation and the stakeholders involved.

For example, if two ground-level laborers have a conflict, what should you do?

 You may ignore it.

However, if you see that some important stakeholders have a conflict, you will intervene, solve the conflict, and spare your project from harm.

Although no single technique can be used for all conflicts, it is thought that the “Collaborate or Problem Solve” method brings the most consensus and commitment.

How to Prevent Conflict 

You cannot keep all conflict from happening, but following a few rules can minimize it. These guidelines are:

  • Establish Strict Ground Rules: These help discipline team members, which results in less conflict.
  • Have an Effective Communication Plan: This can help you avoid many conflicts. Define how much and how often you will communicate with your stakeholders.
  • Have a Better Stakeholder Management Plan: Your project is successful if your stakeholders are happy. Project management is all about managing stakeholders’ requirements. 
  • Solve Conflict Early: This takes less time and effort. Make sure an unresolved conflict doesn’t resurface again later.

The Role of the Project Manager in Conflict Resolution

I have explained all strategies to resolve conflicts and how you can use them. As a project manager, you have to respond rationally and reach a solution that best serves your objective.

While resolving a conflict, keep the following points in mind:

  • Each participant deserves respect
  • Be calm and rational.
  • People are separate from problems
  • Each participant should be listened to patiently
  • There are always areas of agreement and disagreement
  • You should explore all possible solutions.
  • Mind your biases and don’t pick sides
  • Don’t force or pressure participants
  • Postponed conflicts may fester. 
  • Focus on the conflict, don’t let escalate the issue or generalize it.

As a project manager, you are responsible for keeping conflicts under control. You cannot use any single technique for all types of conflict. However, you should use a conflict resolution strategy that inspires consensus and commitment from team members.

This is where this blog post on conflict resolution techniques ends.

Below is my old blog post on conflict resolution strategies based on the fourth edition of the PMBOK Guide. Since I have re-written it based on the sixth edition of the PMBOK Guide , the old blog post is no longer relevant, but I am keeping it archived. 

 “Conflict Resolution Techniques” was one of my favorite topics during my PMP certification exam preparation . Although, I observed a discrepancy between the PMP exam reference books and the PMBOK guide.

All the reference books suggest that confronting is the best conflict resolution technique and that a project manager should use this technique to resolve conflicts in all cases. However, the PMBOK Guide (fourth edition) favors the collaborative technique.

I have repeatedly reviewed this edition of the PMBOK Guide but could not find any support for this. To my surprise, nobody is discussing this discrepancy.

Therefore, I am launching my blog to address this issue, which is my first blog post.

Let’s get started.

Conflict happens while managing projects. The PMI recognizes this fact, and they have incorporated conflict resolution techniques into the PMBOK Guide.

Sources of conflict include scheduling priorities, technical problems, personal issues, scarcity of resources, etc. 

According to the PMBOK Guide (fourth edition), you can use six conflict resolution techniques to resolve conflicts:

  • Withdrawing or Avoiding
  • Smoothing or Accommodating
  • Compromising
  • Collaborating
  • Problem Solving or Confronting

Now I will discuss each technique and the best conflict resolution as per the PMBOK Guide.

  • Withdrawing or Avoiding: The project manager chooses to avoid the conflict, and those involved find a solution.
  • Smoothing or Accommodating: The project manager is involved in the conflict, tries to avoid areas of disagreement and tough discussions, and focuses on commonalities. Smoothing is a way to avoid tough discussions.
  • Compromising: This is a mid-way approach. Here, everybody gains some, but no one gets exactly what they want. This is a lose-lose approach.
  • Forcing: The project manager favors one party at the expense of the others. This technique risks demoralizing team members and may cause serious conflict in the future. This is a win-lose approach.
  • Collaborating: The project manager works with all parties to find a resolution that involves multiple viewpoints to create the best solution. This technique reinforces mutual trust and commitment. This is an example of a win-win approach.

In the fourth edition of the PMBOK Guide, Collaborating and Problem Solving were different techniques. However, the fifth and sixth editions, both are the same technique. Also, problem-solving was known as confronting in the fourth edition, but it no longer appears in current PMBOK Guides. 

A Note on Problem Solving or Confronting Technique

In confronting technique, the project manager must find a solution for a conflict. He will conduct a root cause analysis and provide a platform for all parties to express their disagreements and arrive at a solution.

So, Which is the Best Technique to Resolve a Conflict?

I have reviewed many books and internet resources to discover the best conflict resolution technique. Amazingly, I got the same answer: Confronting or Problem-Solving is the best technique for conflict resolution.

However, I do not agree with this.

A project manager’s job is not easy; they must constantly deal with multiple conflicts. No two conflicts are the same, so why would you always use one technique?

Project managers must use their judgment and experience to decide which conflict resolution technique is most suitable for each situation. The technique selected depends on the situation, timing, and the individuals involved.

The primary objective of the project manager is to complete the project successfully.

A project manager is not a detective. It’s not their job to look for the root cause, dig every available detail and scraps of evidence, and then reach a conclusion.

With problem-solving techniques, one person wins, and another loses; this is not a win-win situation and will leave one party unsatisfied even if they are in the wrong.

A prudent project manager will try to avoid this situation and look for a solution to satisfy all parties. The collaborating conflict resolution technique, which is a win-win situation for all.

Let us see what the PMBOK Guide says:

Page-239, second paragraph:

“If conflict escalates, the project manager should help facilitate a satisfactory resolution. Conflict should be addressed early and usually in private, using a direct, collaborative approach.”

Page-229, last paragraph:

“… managing conflicts in a constructive manner, and encouraging collaborative problem solving and decision-making.”

No statement in the PMBOK Guide suggests using the problem solving/confrontation technique for all conflicts; however, I noticed that the PMBOK Guide recommends the collaborative technique.

It seems that the PMI agrees with me too!

I do not recommend using the collaborative technique to solve all conflicts. However, it is the only technique that leads to consensus and commitment among all parties involved in the conflict.

The strategy of conflict management depends on the conflict. You can use the technique you think best suits the situation to resolve the conflict. However, I cannot agree that confronting is the best conflict resolution technique, and you should not use it blindly.

What conflict resolution techniques help you most to resolve conflicts? Please share your experience through the comments section.

conflict resolution and problem solving

I am Mohammad Fahad Usmani, B.E. PMP, PMI-RMP. I have been blogging on project management topics since 2011. To date, thousands of professionals have passed the PMP exam using my resources.

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64 Comments

Sir, i realy appreaciat your idea and its very educative, please sir what technique should be use in resolving the conflict over land.

I am really impressed with the topics dealt with conflict resolutions

Thanks Elfatih.

what the role as the PM or team member if conflict start to effect core project or one constrains should i start interfere to solve it or ask them to solve it by them self.

or should i report it

If you are not PM, you should report to PM.

If you are a PM you should use your best judgement to handle the issue.

Thanks for your notes and questions bank. Your notes really inspired me how to study PMP exam and I got it passed yesterday.

Congratulations Albert on passing the PMP exam.

Very informative,thanks.

You are welcome Rondity.

Hi Fahad, I failed my first test and preparing for the second one.I prepared well with lot of material including PMBOK. But,i am unable to justify my weak areas.I purchased your 400 questions and scored 80% .Practiced well in all the areas.Can you advise me please?

Send me an email at [email protected] with all details, I will reply you.

Is I have to explain again the need of new requirements to members, which technique should I use? And when we are discussing alternative which one? I found the blog quite clear but to be honest I fail to differentiate when to use collaboration and compromise. Pls can you help me

Compromise is relatively quicker process where you take suggestion from both parties and reach on a conclusion.

In collaborative approach you have a detailed discussion with both parties to reach on a best solution.

may be you are right but in my opinion all strategy are for work and in my case the compromise is the best option for me. Thankyou for your material.

It depends on the situation and stakeholders involve with the conflicts.

Hello Fahad,

I successfully completed the exam and now Certified PM :) I want to thank you for these notes that really helped me understand the processes better in simpler terms. You are great teacher! I had purchased your formula guide and EVM guide as well which was immense help as well. Thank you and God bless you.

Congratulations Hazra on passing the PMP exam.

Your blog is great help. I am currently preparing for my PMP exam. Every time I am stuck or fail to understand a term/usage/formula, I come here and your explanation(s) helps me understand it. I want to thank you for that. And I also appreciate that you update your notes when there is a new edition of PMBOK. So this is a great reference site for people like me preparing to give their exams. Best

You are welcome Hazra. Now the six edition of the PMBOK is arriving next year, so I will have update them again.

Thanks for your comment.

Hey Fahad, Thanks for your awesome notes. I also purchased the question set on Kindle. Helped me clear the test on first attempt.

Regards, Amol

Congratulations Anmol on passing the PMP exam, and I am glad that I could be of help to you.

I like your post, Thank you for the efforts in updating to latest PMBOK and helping the community.

Thanks Qhayum

Thanks Qhayum.

Can I please ask this question?

Is problem solving the most effective, sustainable conflict resolution technique? Please provide reasons to substantiate your response. Discuss your opinion point by point. Thank you

Please read the blog post again till end. This topic has been explained in detail.

Okay Ram, in future update I will try to include some scenario based examples.

I do see 3 to 5 questions coming out in MOCK Exams from Conflict resolution techniques. They are very close in resemblance among each other. However I commit the mistake between Smooth/Accomodate, Compromise/Reconciliation and also between Force/Direct, Withdraw/Avoid.

Judgement becomes tough & above explanations are quite lengthy to recall/remember. In such case, is it possible to provide one scenario(Same people) with different situations that match the 5 conflict resolution techniques to understand?

Many Thanks.

Regards, Ram Narayan

No more conflicts. These techniques are great(Withdraw/Avoid,Smooth/Accommodate, Compromise/Reconcile,Force/Direct,Collaborate/Problem Solve) http://ku.ac.ke

Thanks James for visiting and leaving comment.

I checked the PMOBOK fifth ed. and as you mention, but I also noticed the word confront (in pencil) near the word collaborate. I remembered that our instructor told us they have same meaning.

“but I also noticed the word confront (in pencil) near the word collaborate” – I did not understand what do you mean?

Another nice post. In fact, conflict management technique is a fav topic of mine as well.

However, I am unable to get – how compromise is loose-loose. Wont it be loose-win, even if temporary?

In compromise both parties have to give up something to reach on a common consensus.

(Please note that this article is based on the fourth edition of the PMBOK Guide, in fifth edition, PMI has amalgamated collaborative and problem solving techniques.)

Hello All Which one is the worst conflict resolution method? I think its :forcing/directing, but ive seen places which advocate that withdrawing/avoiding is the worst one. Please share your thoughts.

It depends on situation.

In PMBook 5th edition, collaborating and problem solving are given as synonyms. As for confronting it disappeared, however I just did the exam and it is still the term they use for this. The way I see it, confronting is the same general ideology than collaborating and problem solving, all seeks win-win situation.

Here is an excerpt from 5th ed.: “There are five general techniques for resolving conflict. As each one has its place and use, these are not given in any particular order” […] “Collaborate/Problem Solve. Incorporating multiple viewpoints and insights from differing perspectives; requires a cooperative attitude and open dialogue that typically leads to consensus and commitment.”

I also think confronting/problem solving/collaborating leads to best solutions. As with many other things in life, we often have to select optimal result given the constrains rather than the very best one.

Confronting is not a win-lose, its aim at win-win. you confront ideas of both party and the aim (the very reason why it’s time consuming) is by sharing actively their point of view, a common agreement will emerge (which can be to agree about one or the other party position or on a new position). Since it must be common agreement, it can only be win-win (unless it is a disguised compromise because one of the party pretend to agree). It is really the equivalent of collaborating/problem solving.

In the fourth edition of the PMBOK Guide, confronting and collaborative approach were different, now they are synonyms….

I’m sorry. Read the PMBOK again, and your sources. The PMBOK and PMI reinforce that the book is a “best practices” book, every management book is; take great care to understand and internalize that because the real world is quite different. No credible source can provide us with the “one and only” way, or the best way for all management situations.

The PMBOK does not say (quoting you) “applying the same technique to all conflicts” would be justified.

It actually says the opposite, which ironically is the case your’re making. “…each one has its place and use,”. For example, avoiding a problem, can be VERY effective in certain situation; particularly on a “high functioning” team.

Now, you’re right about the industry consensus on confronting providing the best outcomes and usually as the favorable approach… It is! You just have to know when you have the OPPORTUNITY to use it, and how to employ it.

(I’m a PMP and a “seasoned” Construction PM) Good luck to you!

I should add; collaborating and confronting are cross from parallels. That might be confusing you. If you read the Thomas-Kilman Conflict Mode Instrument; that definition of collaboration is very close to confronting. That and correctly diagnosing the issue goes hand in hand.

However, collaboration is less optimal since it takes time. Every time a conflict comes up; there’s not always time to have a campfire and roast marshmallows. I think the PMBOK is trying to show that finding the root problem, is not always an outcome of collaboration.

You said that:

‘No credible source can provide us with the “one and only” way, or the best way for all management situations.’

I am agree with you on it.

Again you’ re saying:

The PMBOK does not say (quoting you) “applying the same technique to all conflicts” would be justified.

I’m totally agree with you here again, and in fact to prove this point I wrote this blog post. In this blog post I’m only trying to say that PMBOK does not say that you should apply one technique on all conflicts.

I would agree on collaborating is best solution and that also eventually goes to the root cause and as well buys in everybody OK which is a permanent solution than confronting/problem solving.

for the purpose of get few marks we have to choose confronting !

Thanks for agreeing with me.

I feel Fahad is right. Collaborating is the best technique to resolve the conflicts. In most of the real situations , we need all the team members to get along / participate without any grudges. This technique generally helps to take all the team members towards goals without hurting individual’s self esteem. Confronting can not be win – win always. I feel usage of techniques depends upon situation and project managers understanding.

thank you for this post. I really liked it. Although I am still not sure I fully understand the difference between confonting and collaborating. Are there any specific features of these techniquest that can help differentiate them clearly? Currently, I have a feeling that Confronting and Collaborating are almost the same thing

In collaborating, you incorporate multiple viewpoints and negotiate for the best solution. It is a win win approach, on the other hand confronting is problem solving technique. In confronting you will find the root cause of the problem and then reach to its solution. Confronting is a win lose situation.

I was going through the above comments where you mentioned that confronting is a win-lose situation. But if go by Rita Mulcahy , she mentioned confronting as Win-win situation. Even in some of the multiple choice questions is it considered as win-win situation. can you please help to understand this better. Thanks in advance.

Regards, Gagan

In problem solving one loses and other wins regardless of who is on right path.

Not exactly. 2 people may be, dont have any right path, they go to discussion/argument to figure out what is the best way to deal with the conflict.

Confronting/problem solving includes: – Find the root cause of problem, not what is presented to you or what appears to be the problem – Analyze the problem – Identify solution – Pick a solution – Implement a solution – Review the solution and confirm that the solution can deal with the problem.

Hence, Confronting is win-win situation. Win-lose situation refer to Forcing solution (1 win, 1 lose)

Two team members are having conflict, most of the time one is correct and other is wrong.

In this case, if you go for the confronting then obviously the person who is in right path will win and other loses.

Collaborating does not necessarily fix the problem and may show up again, only Confronting does this, it gets to the “root cause”

Yes, you are right but it does not mean that the project manager should always go for confronting.

A project manager has to decide that which technique suits best to the situation.

I see your point thank you.

You are welcome.

What technique is used when a PM suggests to the Team members to contribute their respective PROS and CONS about the issue at hand and then suggests they discuss it. Is this collaborative or confronting?

It depends on what resolution he takes at the end. If he combines multiple view point and find the best agreeable solution, then it will be collaborative. And if he takes resolution of conflicts based on only facts then it will be confronting.

I think confronting will work here because PM trying to go to the root cause of this problem

You may be right but only discussion does not mean that he will chose the confronting. He may also go with the collaborative technique or try to smooth the situation. All depends on the situation and problem at the hand.

Yes you are absolutely right ! good

Thanks for agreeing with me! :)

I like your post very much and am in a project management class right now. Although confronting has a negative connotation, it is not always such. Confronting a problem and dictating how it should be resolved is the PM's job and if the other techniques do not work this approach should be taken. PM'S will run into personalities that will have a conflict with everything or everyone. Taking a direct confrontational approach may be required and should not be seen as a negative componant. Your assessment is great and accurrate.

Thank you for liking my post.

My point is—there is no single universal technique which applies to all conflicts and the PMBOK Guide does not recommend using conflict resolution technique every time a conflict occurs.

good I appreciate yourwork I using as a projects references

Thanks Nasry.

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conflict resolution and problem solving

Global HR — 7 min

Conflict resolution: Essential tips for HR managers

Barbara Matthews

Managers spend four hours a week on conflict management. If you can learn how to resolve conflicts early on, you can save time and energy. In this article, we'll discuss what HR professionals and managers can do to deal with conflict in the workplace effectively and swiftly. We'll also offer tips for resolving conflicts within a global team.

Why is conflict resolution important?

5 conflict resolution strategies hr leaders should know, how do you solve conflict in global teams, address conflict the right way with remote.

Conflict resolution isn’t just about keeping the peace. It’s key to supporting your teams so they can be productive and thrive, leading to better relationships, more retention, and a good reputation as an employer. It’s also important for legal reasons. Let’s dive into the main benefits of workplace conflict resolution.

Why is conflict resolution important

1. Stronger relationships

When animosity between team members goes unaddressed, professional and personal relationships suffer. It results in an environment filled with distrust, resentment, and poor communication.

Taking steps to resolve conflicts can be an opportunity to connect. You can also improve communication and build trust along the way. At the other end of a peaceful resolution is a strongly bonded team.

2. Improved team performance

The better team members can collaborate and communicate with each other, the more productive they typically are. Working together under conflict takes valuable energy that can be spent on productivity and innovation instead.

3. Boosted morale

Only 30% of employees feel engaged at their workplace. Conflict can be anything small that makes employees detached from their workplace. With active conflict management, you show employees that you want to provide them with a healthy work environment. Employees can be more motivated and committed to their work environment as a result.

4. Legal compliance

Discrimination and harassment in the workplace have legal consequences. Managers can prevent legal problems by having a clear framework on how to resolve conflict. If there are issues related to disabilities, race, gender identity, or sexual orientation, employers need to take action to stay legally compliant.

5. Reduced turnover

Bad work culture is a major reason why people leave a company. By resolving conflict and creating a harmonious workplace, you can retain top talent. Check if your HR leaders are listening to your employees and addressing their grievances to create a healthy work environment.

6. Better reputation

Companies with a strong reputation are the ones that attract top talent. Companies that keep top performers make sure that its employees are comfortable with their colleagues. Employees are likely to recommend their company to others, building the company's reputation through word of mouth.

There are five key approaches for addressing conflict in the workplace:

Tips for conflict resolution in a distributed workplace

1. Avoiding

Avoiding conflict means postponing the issue or sidestepping it entirely, hoping conflict will resolve itself with time. It’s most common in scenarios with low stakes. Ignoring conflict is not recommended in the workplace as it is more likely to escalate into bigger problems.

2. Competing

In this strategy, the involved parties all push for their own success, often ignoring the concerns and priorities of the rest of the team.

The competing method often shows up in the workplace when one party asserts their seniority over the other, like a manager over a subordinate.

3. Accommodating

This conflict management style involves one party putting aside their concerns in favor of the other. An example of this in practice would be one team member deciding to work with an unreasonable deadline because they believe doing so will be easier than taking it up with their manager.

4. Compromising

This strategy requires the parties involved to meet each other halfway. In a remote workplace, this could be something like agreeing to run meetings early in the day for one group and late in the day for another so that everyone is included.

5. Collaborating

Here, the parties work together toward a win-win solution without necessarily having to make any trade-offs. For example, a team member can take a call instead of a colleague who would need to join at night to work around time differences.

Resolving conflicts can be trickier when team members live in different parts of the world. Check out the below tactics to resolve conflict and bridge together remote team members.

Tips for conflict resolution in a distributed workplace

1. Acknowledge and bridge cultural differences

Start the conflict resolution process by doing your best to bridge any cultural differences that exist between the parties in conflict. These differences may include attitudes toward collaboration, communication styles, and approaches to work-life balance.

56% of employees value diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) in the workplace. Expressing cultural sensitivity shows your commitment to conflict resolution and DEI. It can also help your team members feel comfortable enough to cooperate.

2. Bring in a neutral party

Any suspicion of favoritism could derail the entire conflict resolution process. Get ahead of this issue by appointing a neutral party to oversee conflict resolution.

This person doesn’t necessarily need to be a professional. Just make sure they’re not someone that either party might accuse of being biased. The parties would be more receptive to a mediator that they perceive as impartial, increasing the likelihood of resolving conflict.

3. Find common ground

When people are in conflict, they often believe that they’re opposed on all fronts. Identifying something they can bond over is a quick way to reframe their perspectives positively.

With a global workforce, common ground could include shared goals, achievements, or frustrations.

4. Set expectations

Invite each party to state what they expect to gain out of the conflict resolution process, and use that information to guide you forward.

If you start the process knowing their negotiables, non-negotiables, and where they’re willing to compromise, you’ll save everyone involved a lot of time.

5. Establish a clear process

The conflict resolution process can fall apart in a heartbeat if you don’t set guidelines for how the involved parties are expected to engage.

To keep things from getting out of hand, you’ll need to establish clear rules for things like when and where to meet, ensuring turn-based communication, and implementing solutions. You should also establish penalties for anyone who doesn’t adhere to the process so the parties remain accountable.

6. Identify the root causes

You can prevent repeating occurrences and mitigate the rippling costs of conflict by solving the root cause of an issue. The actual incident is often a symptom of another problem.

When you dig below the surface, you might find some of the following underlying issues:

Lack of communication

Limited resources

Personality clashes

Unclear job roles

Competing priorities

Poor leadership

Unrealistic expectations

The benefits of addressing these issues go beyond proactive workplace conflict management — you’ll get the opportunity to improve processes and create a more productive workplace.

7. Encourage spontaneous communication

Team members have fewer conflicts when they communicate regularly outside of scheduled meetings. To encourage spontaneous communication in remote teams , start by creating a general channel for “water cooler” conversations. Your team’s rapport with one another will strengthen as a result, and individual members will be less likely to clash.

Conflict is inevitable, but managing it can be especially difficult when working with remote teams. An HR Management like Remote can help you simplify your HR process so you have more time to focus on interpersonal relationships with your distributed team .

Contact us today to find out how you can make your team closer than ever.

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IMAGES

  1. Conflict Resolution: Definition, Process, Skills, Examples

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  2. 5 of the Best Conflict Resolution Skills that Kids Need

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  3. Effective Conflict Resolution Strategies

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  4. Conflict Resolution Poster: RESOLVE- Let's Work it Out

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  5. Conflict and friends

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  6. 5 Ways for Learning Conflict Resolution

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VIDEO

  1. Harvest of Harmony: A Tale of Conflict Resolution Techniques

  2. Conflict Resolution Strategies for Effective Problem Solving || By Zilion

  3. Conflict Resolution & Problem Solving

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COMMENTS

  1. Conflict Resolution and Problem Solving

    Learn how to identify, approach and resolve conflicts with different styles and strategies. Explore the basic problem solving strategy PDCA and the Conflict Tree analogy to clarify the problem and the solution.

  2. 5 Strategies for Conflict Resolution in the Workplace

    Here's a breakdown of the five strategies and when to use each. 1. Avoiding. Avoiding is a strategy best suited for situations in which the relationship's importance and goal are both low. While you're unlikely to encounter these scenarios at work, they may occur in daily life.

  3. Conflict Resolution

    Five Conflict Resolution Strategies. When you find yourself in a conflict situation, these five strategies will help you to resolve disagreements quickly and effectively: 1. Raise the Issue Early. Keeping quiet only lets resentment fester. Equally, speaking with other people first can fuel rumor and misunderstanding.

  4. What is Conflict Resolution, and How Does It Work?

    Conflict Resolution. Conflict Resolution Examples in History: Learning from Nuclear Disarmament; Strategies to Resolve Conflict over Deeply Held Values; How to Handle Conflict in Teams: Lessons from Scientific Collaborations; 5 Conflict Resolution Strategies; Lessons Learned from Cultural Conflicts in the Covid-19 Era; Crisis Negotiations

  5. Managing Conflict Resolution Effectively

    Seven steps for better conflict resolution. Define the source of the conflict. Take your time to reveal the true needs of each party. The greater knowledge you have about the cause of the problem ...

  6. Conflict Resolution Skills: What They Are and How to Use Them

    You may experience conflict with friends, family, or coworkers, and you might need to be able to defuse the situation productively. Conflict resolution skills exist to help you do just that. Practicing open communication by utilizing active listening and patience can bring about peaceful resolutions that foster safe work and home environments.

  7. 5 Conflict Resolution Strategies

    Conflict resolution strategy #5: Separate sacred from pseudo-sacred issues. Conflict management can be particularly intractable when core values that negotiators believe are sacred, or nonnegotiable, are involved, such as their family bonds, religious beliefs, political views, or personal moral code. Take the case of two siblings who disagree ...

  8. Conflict Management

    A normative approach, wherein integrating (also known as problem solving) is seen as the preferred behavior for conflict resolution; a contingency approach, exploring conditions under which each of the behaviors is most appropriate; and a conglomerate approach, focusing on a combination of the behaviors (see "Conglomerate Conflict Behavior").

  9. PDF The SAGE Handbook of Conflict Resolution Problem-Solving Approaches

    Most problem-solving conflict resolution processes have been structured to include similar stages. Wallas (1926) proposed four stages to the creative process: preparation, incubation, illumination, and verification; however, Van Gundy (1988) cautions that in group techniques that push for the

  10. Applying a Problem-Solving Approach to Conflict

    Professor Nobles has presented at national conflict resolution conferences on facilitating collaborative problem solving, cross-cultural communication, and conflict diagnosis. She has practiced mediation for over 15 years, and prior to her employment at Cornell, Professor Nobles was the Cortland County Coordinator for New Justice Mediation ...

  11. 14 Conflict Resolution Strategies for the Workplace

    Conflict resolution is an agreement reached when all or most of the issues of contention are cleared up (Pruitt & Kim, 2004). Further, conflict management is a product of successful problem-solving in which the parties have worked out ways to de-escalate conflict and avoid future escalations. Conflict can be disruptive and, at worst, destructive.

  12. Conflict Resolution Skills

    Pay attention to the feelings being expressed as well as the spoken words of others. Be aware of and respect differences. By avoiding disrespectful words and actions, you can almost always resolve a problem faster. To successfully resolve a conflict, you need to learn and practice two core skills:

  13. Conflict Resolution in the Workplace: Effective Techniques and Strategies

    Collaborative Problem-Solving. Encouraging a collaborative approach to problem-solving can also be highly effective. When team members work together to find a solution, it can foster a sense of ownership and commitment to the outcome. Techniques such as brainstorming, mind mapping, and analysis can be useful tools in this process.

  14. Problem Solving for Conflict Management

    Introduction. Each conflict or problem presents us with an opportunity to solve it constructively and creatively. Conditions change with time and require adaptation and creativity. Two extreme approaches restrain a creative and constructive change: • Rigid resistance to change. • Rapid and disruptive change.

  15. 10 Leadership Conflict Management & Resolution Skills 2024

    Problem-solving skills help leaders or parties in conflict recognize and address the root causes of conflicts by identifying the issues and exploring possible solutions. Leaders can apply the 5 problem-solving steps or 5 conflict management styles for conflict resolution: identify the problem, list possible solutions, evaluate the solutions ...

  16. Effective Communication Skills: Resolving Conflicts

    Even the happiest of relationships experience conflicts and problems (Markman, Stanley, Blumberg, Jenkins & Whiteley, 2004). If handled well, issues provide opportunities for personal and relationship growth. There are many skills that can help individuals seeking to resolve conflicts in a healthy way. One of the greatest skills that aids in conflict resolution is effective communication.

  17. 5 Conflict Resolution Strategies: Steps, Benefits and Tips

    3. Accommodating. This strategy, also known as smoothing, involves one party acquiescing, giving the opposing party exactly what it needs to resolve the problem. This method allows you to resolve a problem in the short-term while working toward a long-term solution.

  18. Conflict Resolution: Skills, Definition and Examples

    In conflict resolution, problem solving techniques such as brainstorming, identifying common goals, and exploring alternative options can help to break down barriers and encourage collaboration. Foster an environment of open dialogue, where individuals feel comfortable sharing ideas and working together towards a resolution.

  19. 7 Conflict Resolution Skills (and How To Use Them at Work)

    6. Problem-solving. Problem-solving skills help you determine the source of a problem and find an effective solution. During conflict resolution, a manager might use their problem-solving skills to identify areas of compromise between two team members who disagree. 7. Responsibility.

  20. Conflict Resolution vs. Problem Solving

    Resolving conflict is an issue that Jesus addressed as well. Jesus recommended that a person giving a gift at the altar go quickly and resolve a conflict (Matthew 5:23). In Matthew 18 the ...

  21. 5 Conflict-Resolution Styles: Is Yours Healthy?

    Competing: This style approaches the conflict as if it's a battle of wills where one person will win and one will lose.It's less about solving the problem and more about figuring out which person gets to have their way this time. Eventually, this can erode the very foundation of the relationship as partners increasingly view each other as competitors battling for control over the relationship.

  22. 5 Conflict Resolution Techniques in Project Management

    Withdraw/Avoid. Smooth/Accommodate. Compromise/Reconcile. Force/Direct. Collaborate/Problem Solve. These conflict management strategies are also known as Thomas-Kilmann's five approaches to resolving conflict. Let's discuss each technique in detail. #1. Withdraw of Avoid.

  23. Validation and short-form development of Conflict and Problem-solving

    The Strategy scales from the Conflicts and Problem-solving Scales is widely used and meaningfully distinguishes between conflict behaviours characterized by Cooperation, Avoidance, Child Involvement, Stalemating, and Verbal and Physical Aggression. The aim of this study was to validate the scale and develop a short-form for use across family ...

  24. Conflict resolution strategies for HR leaders

    The conflict resolution process can fall apart in a heartbeat if you don't set guidelines for how the involved parties are expected to engage. ... You can prevent repeating occurrences and mitigate the rippling costs of conflict by solving the root cause of an issue. The actual incident is often a symptom of another problem. When you dig ...

  25. Conflict Resolution in Relationships & Couples: 5 Strategies

    Step 1 - Eliminate relationship disturbances. Firstly, it is vital to remove or at least reduce emotions that will get in the way of conflict resolution, such as hurt, anger, and resentment. Otherwise, either side is unlikely to listen patiently and openly to what the other is saying. Step 2 - Commit to a win-win posture.

  26. Apply Problem-Solving to Career Conflicts

    Here's how you can apply problem solving skills to conflict resolution in a career counseling setting. Powered by AI and the LinkedIn community. 1. Identify Issues. Be the first to add your ...

  27. Philadelphia Empowers Youth with Conflict Resolution Skills to Tackle

    Philadelphia's PCHR has launched a program teaching high-risk youth conflict resolution to reduce gun violence. ... going away [and a] problem you walk away ... Lauded for Key Role in Solving ...

  28. LIVE: Baylor Commencement, May 2024 (Friday morning)

    There are over 25, 000 studies on the Bible, Marriage, Parenting, and more. Right now, also has an extensive catalog of professional development courses on leadership, team building, community, diversity, and conflict resolution. In fact, Baylor has made the full library, the video library available to all of our faculty and staff.