How to Overcome Perfectionism: 15 Worksheets & Resources

Overcome perfectionism

Maintaining that flawless veneer can put your mental and physical wellbeing at risk as you search for that perfect life (Thomson, 2019).

The number of people experiencing perfectionism is rising dramatically, especially among the young (Curran & Hill, 2019).

So, how do we manage the exceedingly high expectations we have for ourselves and others while addressing our concerns over making mistakes and handling criticism (Stoeber, 2018)?

This article introduces techniques and therapeutic approaches to combat perfectionism and understand when good is good enough.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Productivity Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will help you or your clients become more productive and efficient.

This Article Contains:

How to overcome perfectionism, helping perfectionists with cbt, 3 interventions, activities, and exercises, 3 counseling worksheets and workbooks, perfectionism questionnaires, measuring perfectionism: scales & tests, can meditation help with perfectionism, 4 fascinating books & podcasts, resources from positivepsychology.com, a take-home message.

In their review of perfectionism in college students over a 27-year period, Curran and Hill (2019, p. 410) uncovered a concerning trend: “Recent generations of young people perceive that others are more demanding of them, are demanding of others, and are more demanding of themselves.”

As a result, young people – and other age groups too – are finding themselves subject to excessively high personal standards and increasingly critical self-evaluation. They are experiencing perfectionism .

Haven’t we all at times felt the desire to be more perfect : getting an A, a high-performance job, and having the best dinner date? Researchers and therapists are now finding increasing numbers of people unable to meet the high standards they are setting themselves (Stoeber, 2018; Thomson, 2019).

So, how do we overcome perfectionism?

With social media, parents, academia, an unpredictable economy, high-pressure workplaces, and demanding educational policies all guilty of pushing unrealistic targets for people of all ages, how do we manage the need to always do better?

There are ways to combat our desire for perfection. For some, depending on how they are feeling and acting, self-help books may be sufficient. Others may need talking therapies or Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to break out of negative thinking patterns (Thomson, 2019).

Former clinical psychologist Alice Boyes (2020) suggests focusing on aspects of perfectionism and their potential solutions on a day-to-day basis. By doing so, we can recognize what is essential and what is not, and develop heuristics to manage our daily tasks without becoming derailed by perfectionist ideals.

The following three approaches can help you overcome perfectionism in the workplace (and outside) and ultimately get what is really needed done (modified from Boyes, 2020):

  • Re-assign tasks Perfectionists can find it difficult to let go of control; they don’t want to hand over work for fear that it will not be done properly.

Learn to enjoy handing over tasks to other people and being relieved of the decision-making burden. Ask yourself: Am I best placed to do this? Would my time be better spent elsewhere? Could someone else step up and be accountable for this task?

  • Stop over-delivering It can be tempting to think, “If I’m not over-delivering, I’m under-delivering.” This is unlikely. If given time, resources, and payment to complete a piece of work, perform it well, but your standards and time investment should not be disproportionate to its value.

Recognize that a client may not expect you to reply within two hours. And if you are paid for a day’s work, it should not be extended into the remainder of the week. Depending on the task, try to focus on areas where you can add the most value according to the time and resources agreed.

  • 100% consistency is unlikely  You may find you avoid starting a new habit unless you know you can achieve perfection in it every day. This can lead to procrastination and avoidance coping strategies.

Be flexible. Recognize you can take time off from working toward your goals, especially if you are starting to feel burned out .

The three approaches above are practical ways to keep perfectionism from impeding high performance and task completion. Essentially, they are about balance. High standards are required in almost all jobs, but they have to be realistic, and you need to be aware that mistakes can lead to development and growth.

The following interventions and exercises go deeper, exploring how we can change the beliefs associated with avoiding setting impossible-to-maintain standards.

Technology & Mental Health

While traditionally focusing on clinical perfectionism – defined as being overly dependent on achieving “personally demanding, self-employed standards” – therapists can use it to challenge all aspects of perfectionist thinking and behavior (Stoeber, 2018, p. 284).

At its heart, CBT can help clients recognize that their self-worth does not depend on their striving or achieving.

Behavioral experiments are a core aspect of CBT treatment and are highly effective.

Joachim Stoeber (2018) takes us through an example of such a technique with a teacher with perfectionist tendencies that are affecting her work and life. Emmy worries that unless she spends excessive time on students’ yearly reports, parents will complain.

The following provides a working example of the key steps involved in this powerful CBT technique (modified from Stoeber, 2018):

  • Identify the belief According to Emmy, “Unless I spend at least five hours preparing each child’s report, their parents will complain.”
  • Experiment Emmy was asked to write half of her reports using the ‘five-hour method’ and the remainder assigning a maximum of 30 minutes to each.
  • Specific predictions Emmy predicted with 95% certainty that she would receive a lot of complaints in the 30-minute group and very few from reports where she used her original strategy.
  • Results Despite feeling anxious regarding the experiment, Emmy received no complaints from either report group.
  • Re-rate Emmy reduced her self-rating from a 95% expectation that her original belief was true to 60% when she re-rated her belief.
  • Conclusions Emmy realized that her attempts to be perfect meant that she was spending too much time on each report and could do a good job in less time, and still keep parents happy.

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Challenging and changing our beliefs is not always straightforward. Understanding and becoming more aware of our thinking can help us set goals and transform our lives, breaking free of perfectionism.

The self-assessment, identification of perfectionist triggers, and goal-setting activities and exercises below do just that.

Perfectionist Beliefs ‘Flexibility’ Self-Assessment

Assessing the flexibility of your perfectionist thinking is a valuable activity. The less rigid and more flexible your thought patterns, the easier it is to change unwanted or incorrect beliefs.

Use the Perfectionist Beliefs ‘Flexibility’ Self-Assessment worksheet to identify where your thinking is rigid and where you may need to focus further attention going forward (modified from Antony & Swinson, 2009).

Ask yourself the following questions:

  • Do you find it difficult to recognize when you are being a perfectionist? Give examples.
  • Do you find it difficult to relax your high standards? Give examples.
  • Are you typically unwilling to consider someone’s suggestion that you are being a perfectionist? Give examples.
  • Do you typically disagree when someone says your standards are too high? Give examples.
  • Do you get upset when you can’t meet your own standards?
  • Do you get upset when others can’t meet your standards?

If you are inflexible regarding your perfectionist thinking, you may find breaking free of it more difficult. Yet, in time, you can learn to ease up on yourself and others.

Identifying Perfectionist Triggers

There are most likely recurring themes or triggers behind your perfectionist thinking and behavior.

The Identifying Perfectionist Triggers worksheet will help you build a picture of and reflect on activities that trigger your perfectionism.

Review the form regularly. Add more lines and look for patterns in your perfectionist thinking and behavior. Identify where you need to cut yourself some slack and recognize areas in your life where perfectionism could do harm.

Goal Setting to Manage Perfectionism

Goal setting can help you define the problem you wish to overcome, the general goals you would like to set (in a non-perfectionist way), and the tasks involved in reaching them.

Use the Goal Setting to Manage Perfectionism worksheet to capture what you would like to change and the goals you can set to complete the challenge.

It can be helpful to re-write the list regularly in priority order and remove those items you feel you have addressed. Let this become a working list of the changes you would like to make to ensure your perfectionist tendencies are managed and do not get in the way of living your life.

Perfectionism standards

Perfectionism Diary

In therapy and counseling, the process of helping an individual with a particular problem typically begins with an assessment (Antony & Swinson, 2009).

The Perfectionism Diary provides a valuable template to diarize perfectionist thinking when it happens. Its completion and later review can help identify triggers and patterns involved in thought processes.

Keep copies of the completed forms and review them once a week to see where expectations are set too high and standards are impossible to maintain.

Expecting Perfectionism From Others

Often our focus for perfectionism is not on ourselves, but on others in our lives. Unfairly and with impossibly high expectations, we may be setting them up to fail and risk harming our relationships with them (Stoeber, 2018).

The Expecting Perfectionism From Others worksheet identifies the people with whom you tend to be overly perfectionistic and why (modified from Antony & Swinson, 2009).

Reevaluating Your Perfectionist Standards

The previous worksheets are useful to understand where, when, and with whom perfectionism is typically triggered.

Awareness of perfectionist triggers is crucial, and so is an understanding of how unrealistic expectations impact lives.

Use the Reevaluating Your Perfectionist Standards worksheet to understand the effect of these perfectionist standards on others’ lives.

Working through these questions can help you gain perspective regarding the effect of your perfectionist standards on your life.

Why perfectionism isn’t perfect and how to overcome it

There are several less formal self-assessment questionnaires for perfectionism, many of which are available for free online:

  • Self-Assessment Perfectionism Screening Test – 15 questions, answered yes or no, that provide a simple screening test for perfectionism.
  • Perfectionist Quiz – Answer each of the 22 items with never, sometimes, frequently, or always to gain insight into your perfectionist tendencies.

Measuring perfectionism

  • Frost Multidimensional Perfectionism Scale – a well-validated, 35 question self-report measure
  • Hewitt-Flett Multidimensional Perfectionism Scale – a well-validated, 45-question self-report measure taking approximately 15 minutes to complete

Each contains subscales capturing perfectionistic strivings and concerns that combine to form the standard two-factor model of perfectionism.

There are significant links between the use of meditation and mindfulness  and a decline in perfectionist thoughts.

A seven-week mindfulness relaxation course increased students’ resilience and self-efficacy, while reducing stress levels and perfectionism scores (Burns, Lee, & Brown, 2011).

Why not try out these mindfulness and meditation podcasts ? Whether directly or indirectly, they may be beneficial in reducing or managing perfectionism.

There are many valuable books and podcasts on perfectionism, its impact, and how we can learn to cope with such challenging tendencies. We have selected four of our favorites below.

When Perfect Isn’t Good Enough: Strategies for Coping with Perfectionism – Martin Antony and Richard Swinson

When Perfect Isn’t Good Enough

The fully revised second edition of this immensely valuable text provides powerful and practical methods for understanding the root causes of perfectionism and introduces coping skills to help overcome its hold on your life.

This is an essential text for practitioners working with clients with perfectionist tendencies.

Find the book on Amazon .

The Psychology of Perfectionism: Theory, Research, Applications – Joachim Stoeber

The Psychology of Perfectionism

It is invaluable reading for students, academics, and professionals in clinical and counseling psychology.

The Sport Psych Show – Perfectionism in Sport

Although this podcast focuses on sports, this fascinating episode featuring Dr. Andy Hill is just as relevant to other areas of our lives.

Andy introduces the listener to valuable insights into the consequences of perfectionism and how coaches can help athletes overcome such tendencies.

Access this podcast episode here .

Psychologists Off the Clock – Perfectionism With Sharon Martin

In this insightful and valuable episode, Diana Hill interviews psychotherapist and author Sharon Martin about her knowledge of perfectionism.

Sharon helps listeners understand how perfectionists can find themselves disconnected from their values and are often left fearing the judgment of others.

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World’s Largest Positive Psychology Resource

The Positive Psychology Toolkit© is a groundbreaking practitioner resource containing over 500 science-based exercises , activities, interventions, questionnaires, and assessments created by experts using the latest positive psychology research.

Updated monthly. 100% Science-based.

“The best positive psychology resource out there!” — Emiliya Zhivotovskaya , Flourishing Center CEO

We have many resources that will help you or your clients handle perfectionism better through increased awareness of emotional and psychological needs and effective coping mechanisms.

  • What Makes a Perfect Day? It’s essential to understand the difference between experiencing a perfect day and using perfectionism to drive ourselves and others too far.
  • Stress Decision Framework Use this tool to place decision-making into context and accept that sometimes we must aim for good enough , not perfect, decisions.

If you’re looking for more science-based ways to help others become more productive and efficient, this collection contains 17 validated productivity and work efficiency exercises . Use them to help others prioritize better, eliminate time wasters, maximize their personal energy, and more.

Setting high standards is not unhealthy; indeed, it will probably lead to exceptional performance in multiple areas of your life. However, working toward impossible-to-reach levels of performance can be damaging, especially when it is constant.

Similarly, it is vital to recognize that all of us will fail and make mistakes at some point. But that’s okay. If we accept that this is a necessary aspect of human growth , we can learn, improve, and strengthen our relationships with ourselves and those around us.

It can help to accept that being human means that we are not 100% consistent all the time and that our fallibility and vulnerability make us human, capable of unlearning and relearning.

CBT, along with other talking therapies, can help to challenge our beliefs. We can learn to identify our triggers and harmful thinking patterns, creating new realistic goals, and learning to accept how good enough looks.

Why not try out some of the exercises, techniques, and assessments and see the benefits of moving away from impossible-to-maintain perfectionist tendencies?

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Productivity Exercises for free .

  • Antony, M. M., & Swinson, R. P. (2009). When perfect isn’t good enough: Strategies for coping with perfectionism . New Harbinger Publications.
  • Boyes, A. (2020, March 3). Don’t let perfection be the enemy of productivity . Harvard Business Review. Retrieved August 24, 2021, from https://hbr.org/2020/03/dont-let-perfection-be-the-enemy-of-productivity
  • Burns, J. L., Lee, R. M., & Brown, L. J. (2011). The effect of meditation on self-reported measures of stress, anxiety, depression, and perfectionism in a college population. Journal of College Student Psychotherapy , 25 (2), 132–144.
  • Curran, T., & Hill, A. P. (2019). Perfectionism is increasing over time: A meta-analysis of birth cohort differences from 1989 to 2016. Psychological Bulletin , 145 (4), 410–429.
  • Stoeber, J. (2018). The psychology of perfectionism: Theory, research, applications . Routledge, Taylor & Francis Group.
  • Thomson, H. (2019, August 14). The misunderstood personality trait that is causing anxiety and stress . New Scientist. Retrieved August 24, 2021, from https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg24332430-600-the-misunderstood-personality-trait-that-is-causing-anxiety-and-stress/

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Daisy

This article was really Helpful!. Can the Frost Multidimensional perfectionism scale be used for an undergraduate dissertation? is the scale free to use ?

Julia Poernbacher

This scale is freely available to use and a copy of it with scoring information can be accessed here .

Hope this helps!

Kind regards, Julia | Community Manager

pollydee p. goltche

Very useful article. I was raised by a perfectionist who set the bar super high. There was always ONE standard. As an only child of much older parents, I got the message quickly what was expected of me. Interestingly, when raising my own four children (as a young mother), I tried to instill high standards, yet was never critical of them, perhaps avoiding being like my dad had been with me, although I value endlessly all that he taught me. As I have gotten older, I have found that this orientation does not really go away. In times of stress, sadness, etc.. I even find that the perfectionism gets worse, perhaps in an effort to control “anything.” Your suggestions are excellent. Thank you so much.

Nicol Michelle

Thanks Jeremy for writing and sharing this. Great stuff! I was reading having my clients in mind and realized that I (may- LOL) be in denial of being a perfectionist myself.

Kylee

Thank you so much for this, Jeremy! I am currently a placement student at a drug and alcohol rehabilitation centre, and I think this will greatly help me assist some of the clients who struggle with the stress of perfectionism.

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10 Tips for Treating Academic Perfectionism

By Kayla Zebrowski, LCSW and C. Alec Pollard, PhD

This article was initially published in the Winter 2022 edition of  the OCD Newsletter . 

In the Fall of 2021, the OCD Newsletter featured an informative article by Fred Penzel, PhD, on the nature and treatment of academic perfectionism. In this follow-up article, Kayla Zebrowski and C. Alec Pollard share their recommendations for therapists working with students impaired by this form of OCD. 

“Perfectionism” is a term used in many different ways. It can be a compliment applied to someone thought of as conscientious or fastidious. It has also been identified as a set of traits by psychologists studying personality. In this article, however, we discuss a type of perfectionism involving clinically significant impairment. According to Shafran, Egan, & Wade (2010), dysfunctional perfectionism is:

“the setting of, and striving to meet, very demanding standards that are self-imposed and relentlessly pursued despite…causing problems.”

The application of demanding standards to schoolwork is called dysfunctional academic perfectionism (DAP). Students with DAP may stay up all night trying to perfect their homework or put it off indefinitely because completing the task to their standards feels too overwhelming. People with DAP struggle with indecision and procrastination and, as a result, schoolwork is often turned in late. They are highly self-critical and often seek reassurance, which leads to family conflict. DAP can also lead to social isolation and depression.

Evidence suggests that DAP is more prevalent today than ever before. Researchers have identified a steady rise in perfectionism among college students over the past several decades (Curran & Hill, 2019), a finding consistent with our clinical experience. In fact, DAP is the primary treatment focus for at least 25% of the patients in our Intensive Outpatient Program. Though not officially listed as a subtype of OCD, DAP can be reasonably conceptualized as an obsessive compulsive problem. Perfectionistic obsessions typically involve themes similar to those found in OCD, like intolerance of uncertainty and not-right feelings. Similar to people with OCD, students with DAP engage in avoidance and compulsions. When presented with an academic task, they either avoid it by procrastinating or attempt the task while performing perfectionistic compulsions like over-researching, over-editing, over-studying, mental checking, re-writing, and re-reading.

Viewing DAP as a form of OCD has important treatment implications. It has been our experience that evidence-based interventions for OCD, especially exposure and response prevention (ERP), can be successfully used to treat DAP. Other clinicians report similar findings (Hood & Antony, 2015). Nonetheless, DAP presents special challenges for which some therapists are unprepared. We believe a therapist’s ability to address these challenges is crucial in determining whether or not treatment will be effective. Here are 10 tips we hope will assist students, parents, and therapists contending with the challenges of DAP:  

  • Provide the student with a healthy alternative to perfectionism .

Many perfectionists believe the only alternative to striving for perfection is to become irresponsible and unproductive. It is therefore helpful to show students a functional alternative and how it differs from perfectionism. At our clinic, we use the pursuit of excellence as the alternative to perfectionism. The table below highlights the differences. 

  •   Help the student establish realistic expectations.

Students with DAP underestimate the amount of time and effort necessary to meaningfully change how they approach academics. It is common for them to expect therapists to get them caught up on incomplete homework from prior classes, avoid getting further behind in current classes, and recover from DAP all at the same time. When presented with such unrealistic goals, the therapist must be the voice of reason. This means establishing realistic expectations and timelines, including the amount of time the student is willing to reserve for therapy. It may also mean discussing unwelcome topics like taking medical leave, attending summer school, scheduling time on the weekends to catch up, and the possibility of being placed back a grade in school. 

  •   Get the parents on board.

Parents often come with the same unrealistic expectations as their perfectionistic son or daughter. As a result, they should be included in at least some of the discussions mentioned in Tip #2 so that their expectations are realistic as well. Furthermore, parents who actively accommodate avoidance (e.g., doing the student’s homework) or who do things that increase the student’s anxiety (e.g., pressuring or lecturing) may need guidance from the therapist regarding how best to support recovery.

  •   Get the school on board.

The ability of schools to respond effectively to DAP has improved since passage of the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) of 1990. Even so, some teachers, school counselors, and administrators struggle to understand DAP. Failure to turn in homework, for example, may be interpreted as laziness or irresponsibility. The therapist should educate school personnel about DAP, establish realistic expectations, and advocate on behalf of the student for temporary accommodations to address the limitations imposed by DAP. 

  •   Look for organizational skill deficits.

Although some students with DAP appear highly organized, many are not. Common deficits include underestimating the time it takes to complete tasks, difficulty establishing priorities, trouble developing and following a schedule, and difficulty organizing an academic project into manageable steps. Therapists should routinely assess the student’s ability to manage and organize study time and address any deficits identified. Many of the strategies used in Behavioral Activation, especially the practice of following a daily schedule, can be helpful for students with DAP. However, the focus here is less on activation and more on completing a planned task (exposure) within the specified time period (response prevention).

  •   ERP is more than doing schoolwork quickly. 

Students with DAP are inefficient because of their efforts to avoid the distress of uncertainty and not-right feelings. ERP is an opportunity to learn how to tolerate those feelings, not a race to get something done. An example of ERP instructions given to one of our students may help illustrate the point:

“Read until you get the urge to re-read a passage in the book, then close the book so you are unable to re-read. Turn on the script we recorded that helps you focus on the feeling of doubt, that you might not have understood the words perfectly. Sit with the doubt while listening to the script for 10 minutes, or until you are confident you will not try to re-read the passage that triggered you. Then resume reading until you are triggered again.”

  •   Start ERP with low-challenge, non-academic tasks.

A common mistake in treating DAP is targeting schoolwork as an exposure task before the student has demonstrated the ability to follow response prevention guidelines under less challenging conditions. This is an understandable error given the pressure often exerted by everyone involved. However, some students cannot email a friend without repeatedly deleting and re-writing, much less write a whole term paper. Going too far up the exposure hierarchy at the expense of response prevention adherence risks creating the illusion of progress without the requisite learning needed for real progress to occur. Therapists should ensure the student is able to first resist compulsions during low-challenge, non-academic tasks before incorporating schoolwork into ERP.      

  •   Consider incorporating basic start-stop practice.

If a student struggles adhering to time limits in ERP or has difficulty following a study schedule, it may be helpful to assess the student’s fundamental ability to stop and start tasks. For students who have difficulty transitioning between even simple, non-anxiety provoking tasks, basic start-stop practice can be helpful. For example, a student might be instructed to engage in a non-aversive activity (e.g., drawing a picture) for 5 minutes and then practice moving rapidly to the next non-aversive task (e.g., a video game). An alarm or therapist prompt is used to signal the time to move between tasks. Multiple sets of tasks may be included in one practice session. Once the student demonstrates the ability to transition effectively between non-aversive tasks, the therapy can incorporate the more challenging tasks involved in ERP.

  •   Diversify the student’s sources of self-worth.

Students with DAP derive their self-worth disproportionately from academic achievement, which further magnifies the threat of doing poorly in school. It is helpful to encourage students to look beyond academics when determining their self-worth. This includes helping them clarify their non-academic values, recognize other interests and talents, and increase their participation in non-academic activities (e.g., social interaction, hobbies, paid or volunteer work, etc.).

  • Encourage more flexible long-term goals.

It is common for students with DAP to view certain goals as the ultimate goal, for example, fixating on only certain universities, one professional role, or a specific occupational title. Anything short of that is perceived as failure. It is easy to see how goals like this contribute to academic anxiety. The narrower the definition of success, the greater the chance for “failure.” It is therefore helpful to encourage students to broaden their options. Interventions like cognitive restructuring, values clarification, and motivational interviewing can help students expand their list of acceptable options and develop realistic contingency plans in case their preferred options do not materialize.

DAP is a potentially disabling condition, but in the hands of a skilled OCD therapist, it is highly treatable (Szymanski, 2011). We hope we have encouraged more therapists to work with DAP and that the information we have shared improves the quality of the care they provide. 

References:

Curren, T., Hill, A.P. (2019). Perfectionism is increasing over time: A meta-analysis of birth cohort differences from 1989 to 2016. Psychological Bulletin, 145, 410-429.

Frost, R.O, Marten, P., Lahart, C., & Rosenblate, R. (1990). The dimensions of perfectionism. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 14, 449-468. 

Hood, H.K., & Antony, M.M. (2016). Treatment of perfectionism-related obsessive- compulsive disorders. In E.A., Storch & A., Lewin (Eds.), Clinical Handbook of Obsessive-Compulsive and Related Disorders, pp. 85-97 . Springer.

Shafran, R., Egan, S., & Wade, T. (2019). Overcoming perfectionism : A self-help guide using scientifically supported cognitive behavioural techniques (2nd Ed.). London: Robinson Publishing.

Sulkowski, M.L., Jordan, C., Dobrinsky, S.R., & Mathews, R.E. (2018). Chapter 12 - OCD in School Settings. In E.A. Storch, J.F. McGuire, & D. McKay (Eds.), The Clinician's Guide to Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy for Childhood Obsessive-compulsive Disorder (pp. 225-241). Academic Press.

Szymanski, J. (2011). The perfectionist’s handbook: Take risks, invite criticism, and make the most of your mistakes. New York: Wiley Publishing.

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A Beginner’s Guide to Overcoming Perfectionism

Over 50 free resources for overcoming perfectionism including assessments, PDF workbooks, printable worksheets, videos, articles, and more.

This guide has 50+ free resources for overcoming perfectionism including assessments, worksheets/handouts, workbooks, guides, videos, articles, and more.

overcoming perfectionism

Do you hold yourself or others to unrealistic standards and find yourself defeated or frustrated when those standards aren’t met? Are you sensitive to criticism and have a fear of making mistakes? Do you have a tendency to procrastinate? Are you driven by fear or have an intense fear of failure? If so, you may be a perfectionist. And it may be hindering you instead of helping.

The Dictionary.com definition of perfectionism is “a personal standard, attitude, or philosophy that demands perfection and rejects anything less.” The American Psychological Association further defines perfectionism as it relates to mental health as “the tendency to demand of others or of oneself an extremely high or even flawless level of performance, in excess of what is required by the situation.”

Perfectionism can be unhealthy – harmful even – and is associated with depression, anxiety, and other mental disorders.

This beginner’s guide to overcoming perfectionism provides free resources for assessment, exploration, education, and motivation.

Assessment & Screening

How much of a perfectionist are you? Take a test!

  • Measuring Your Perfectionism | Source: York St. John University
  • Multidimensional Perfectionism Test | Online interactive tool from IDR Labs
  • Perfectionist Beliefs ‘Flexibility Self-Assessment | Source: Positive Psychology
  • Perfectionism Quiz (overcoming.co.uk)
  • Perfectionist Quiz | A 22-question online interactive quiz by Sharon Martin (Source: Live Well with Sharon Martin )
  • Perfectionism Test | Online interactive tool from PsychTests
  • Self-Assessment Perfectionism Screening Test | A 15-question PDF assessment by Bill Gaultiere (Source: Soul Shepherding )

Worksheets & Handouts for Overcoming Perfectionism

Use the worksheets below to learn more about perfectionism and to do some self-exploration.

  • 3 Ps of Perfectionism (from Counseling Library)
  • Considering the Importance of Changing Perfectionism and Your Confidence that You Can Make Changes (overcoming.co.uk)
  • Expecting Perfectionism from Others (from Positive Psychology)
  • Goal-Setting to Manage Perfectionism (from Positive Psychology)
  • How to Overcome Perfectionism (from Anxiety Canada)
  • Identifying Perfectionist Triggers (from Positive Psychology)
  • Model of Perfectionism (getselfhelp.co.uk)
  • OCD/Perfectionism Thought Record Sheet (getselfhelp.co.uk)
  • Perfectionism (from Dr. Danny Gagnon)
  • Perfectionism Diary (from Positive Psychology)
  • Perfectionism Versus Doing Things Well (from York St. John University)
  • The Perfection Scale (getselfhelp.co.uk)
  • Questions to Help Determine if You Have Unhelpful Perfectionism (overcoming.co.uk)
  • Reevaluating Your Perfectionist Standards (from Positive Psychology)
  • What is Perfectionism? (therapistaid.com)
  • Which Areas of Perfectionism Apply to Me (overcoming.co.uk)

For additional worksheets and handouts see 200+ Sites with Free Therapy Worksheets & Handouts .

Workbooks & Guides for Overcoming Perfectionism

  • Cognitive Distortions-Perfectionism | Group facilitation material from My Group Guide
  • Overcoming Perfectionism: Client Workbook | A 20-page workbook from Professor Tracey Wade, Flinders University (2019)
  • Perfectionism | A workbook and information sheets from CCI
  • Perfectionism | Focused Minds Program | A free, online self-help program for overcoming perfectionism

For additional PDF workbooks, manuals, and guides see 500 Free Printable Workbooks & Manuals for Therapists .

Videos for Overcoming Perfectionism

Podcasts About Perfectionism

226. ACT for Perfectionism with Jennifer Kemp
88. Perfectionism with Sharon Martin

Articles & Research About Perfectionism

Increase your knowledge and find out what research tells us about perfectionism.

  • 12 Essential Tips for Overcoming Perfectionism – Sharon Martin, LCSW Counseling San Jose and Campbell, CA (sharonmartincounseling.com) (2018)
  • Coping With Perfectionism | LoveToKnow
  • The Dangerous Downsides of Perfectionism – BBC Future (2018)
  • The Effects of Perfectionism on Mental and Physical Health (medicalnewstoday.com) (2018)
  • How to Manage Your Perfectionism (from Harvard Business Review, 2019)
  • How to Overcome Perfectionism (from Very Well Mind, 2020)
  • How to Overcome Perfectionism: 15 Worksheets & Resources (from Positive Psychology, 2021)
  • The Many Faces of Perfectionism (apa.org) (2003)
  • Overcoming Perfectionism: Protocol of a Randomized Controlled Trial of an Internet-Based Guided Self-Help Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Intervention (nih.gov) (2016)
  • Perfectionism | Psychology Today
  • Perfectionism Linked to Burnout at Work, School and Sports, Research Finds | ScienceDaily (2015)
  • Perfectionism: The Different Types of Perfectionist and How They Cope (oxford-review.com)
  • Self-Compassion Counterbalances Maladaptive Perfectionism | Psychology Today (2018)
  • Self-C o mpassion May Protect People from the Harmful Effects of Perfectionism | ScienceDaily (2018)
  • What Causes Perfectionism? (psychcentral.com) (2015)

Quotes for Overcoming Perfectionism

“Perfectionism is the art of never being satisfied.” Unknown
“Have no fear of perfection – you’ll never reach it.” Salvador Dali

“Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to do our best. Perfectionism is not about healthy achievement and growth; it’s a shield.”

-Brené Brown

“Have the courage to be imperfect.” Alfred Adler
“Perfection is the enemy of progress.” Winston Churchill

“If you look for perfection, you’ll never be content.”

— Leo Tolstoy

Additional Resources for Overcoming Perfectionism

Disclaimer:  This section contains affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

homework anxiety perfectionism

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Home » Blog » Anxiety » How to Overcome Perfectionism Anxiety with CBT

How to Overcome Perfectionism Anxiety with CBT

  • 5 Jul / 2021

How to Overcome Perfectionism Anxiety with CBT

If You are a perfectionist, you’re likely to spend a significant amount of time in bed thinking about your to-do lists and hardly managing to get some sleep. Perhaps it’s hard for you to take criticisms from friends and family, and it can be even more complicated when it has to do with your work or school performance. Simultaneously, you may find it challenging to give yourself praises, accept compliments from others about your work, and find hardly a minute to celebrate your victories! If this is what happens to you, you are likely experiencing perfectionism anxiety. You are not alone!  

Whether perfectionism is new to you or you can’t remember it ever being different, this type of anxiety and how you react to it can take a significant toll on your quality of life, impacting not only work but also your relationships and free time. The good news is that there are proven ways to deal with perfectionism anxiety. CBT (Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy) is the elective type of therapy for this type of anxiety. CBT helps people understand and challenge their unhelpful thinking styles while generating long-lasting change in responding to situations triggering their anxiety in everyday life. Read more to find out how to overcome perfectionism anxiety with CBT!

How are Perfectionism and Anxiety Connected?

If you are a perfectionist, you are likely to experience lots of internal pressure driven by the high standards you place upon yourself in various areas of your life. Often a significant emphasis is placed upon achievement. Consequently, perfectionists push themselves to work very hard, often giving themselves little time to relax, which can be mentally and physically tiring. As a perfectionist, If you meet the high standard, any inner positive praise (if there is any) is short-lived, the achievement may be downplayed, and the efforts are focused on the next goal to reach. When the high standard is not reached, this can be highly disappointing for someone with perfectionism. It can easily be attributed to having ‘failed’ instead of the bar being too high or simply accepting that not achieving a goal is a normal part of life.  

The internal pressure that perfectionists experience can be helpful to an extent as it can drive them to work hard and perform well. However, sometimes the pressure is too high and prolonged, leaving people feeling overly stressed and anxious.  

How does CBT Help With Perfectionism Anxiety?

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is a common therapy approach that has shown to be effective for various emotional difficulties such as depression, anxiety, stress and anger. Therefore, it can be a useful therapeutic approach for those who experience anxiety associated with their perfectionism. Here is what CBT for anxiety associated with perfectionism often looks like.

Understanding what Keeps Perfectionism Going: CBT Formulation

At the beginning of CBT, you will work with your therapist to develop a formulation, a diagram demonstrating how the anxiety associated with perfectionism is being maintained. There are many benefits of drawing a formulation collaboratively with your therapist. They help understand how perfectionism works and, crucially, why it persists over time. Here’s an example:

Perfectionism Anxiety - Vicious Cycle

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Not Getting a Promotion at Work

I should have worked harder. I’m a failure. I’m not good enough. I’m a fraud.

Stress. Anxiety.

Body tension. Headaches. Upset stomach. Palpitations

Work long hours, give myself few breaks. Prepare lots before meetings/presentations. Check over my work several times. Procrastinate.

A formulation diagram like this one also shows a typical vicious cycle that is experienced in the present moment, showing how it is often the type of responses we adopt to deal with our difficult emotions and thoughts that lead to maintaining perfectionism.  

What Triggers Perfectionism?

A crucial aspect of drawing a formulation is to understand what your triggers are. These are event and interactions which kick-start your vicious cycle. Learning about your specific triggers with a therapist can make you feel more in control of your perfectionism. This can happen already from the initial stages of therapy. You can start to predict instances where it might manifest and begin to prevent it from taking over. Triggers are very subjective, and they will change from person to person. However, some common triggers we found with clients are as follows:

  • perceived criticism
  • failing an exam
  • making a mistake
  • not getting a promotion at work
  • not getting the job you wanted

What Causes Perfectionism?

After understanding how your perfectionism works in the present, it can be very helpful in therapy to uncover what earlier experiences have led to the development of your anxiety associated with your perfectionism. Some common factors linked with developing perfectionism we often see in therapy are:  

  • Having critical parents  
  • Growing up with parents with perfectionism
  • Only receiving praises when you did very well  
  • High pressure placed upon academics  
  • High pressure placed on getting a good job

Perfectionism Anxiety Infographic

</p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> <p><strong>Please include attribution to https://therapy-central.com with this graphic.</strong></p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> <p><a href=’https://therapy-central.com/2021/07/05/how-to-overcome-perfectionism-anxiety-with-cbt/’><img src=’https://therapy-central.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/Perfectionism-Anxiety-Infographic.png<span data-mce-type=”bookmark” style=”display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;” class=”mce_SELRES_start”></span><span data-mce-type=”bookmark” style=”display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;” class=”mce_SELRES_start”></span>’ alt=” 540px border=’0′ /></a></p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> <p>

How Will You Benefit from a CBT Formulation for Perfectionism Anxiety?

Completing your formulation with your therapist can help you gain a more in-depth understanding of your anxiety and perfectionism, which can be empowering in and of itself. In addition, becoming more aware of how it may have developed and is persisting in the present can lead to people being more compassionate and gentle towards themselves because they face such vicious cycles and struggle with high stress and anxiety levels.  

Very importantly, the formulation reveals where it is good to make positive changes or adjustments. For example, suppose you can make good changes to one or more of the cycle areas (i.e. thoughts, feelings, behaviours and physical sensations). In that case, this can break down the cycle, leading to improvements to your emotional and physical well-being and gradually letting go of your perfectionism.

Let’s now look at ways that CBT can help to make some of these sound changes.  

What CBT Techniques Can Help with Perfectionism Anxiety?

CBT has multiple techniques in its arsenal which help deal with anxiety, including when it ties in with perfectionism. Once a formulation has been drawn collaboratively with your therapist, CBT will help via a mix of cognitive and behavioural techniques. These will target the thoughts and actions that keep you stuck in a cycle of perfectionism anxiety. For example, one of the most common techniques, known as ‘thought challenging’, aims to rebalance unhelpful thinking styles.

Thought Challenging to Help with Perfectionism Anxious Thoughts

A significant component of CBT involves examining an individual’s thinking patterns. Here are some common thinking patterns in those who are perfectionistic:

  • I should be doing better
  • I’m not good enough
  • I’m a failure
  • I should only relax after I have completed XYZ
  • I shouldn’t be struggling with this
  • If I don’t get the promotion, then it means I’m unworthy

Of course, if these thoughts are frequent, always believed, and we allow them to dictate what we do, this can lead to anxiety and stress. A crucial technique In CBT helps you catch and challenge these kinds of thoughts with the help of a therapist. One way we do this in therapy is by helping you answer questions such as:  

  • Am I being kind to myself or overly self-critical?
  • Am I placing too much pressure on myself?
  • How helpful is it to think this way?
  • What is the evidence to support these thoughts?
  • What is the evidence to contradict this thought?
  • Will this matter in 3 months’ time?

Answering such questions can help you develop more balanced, accurate and helpful thoughts. In turn, your anxiety and stress will decrease.  

homework anxiety perfectionism

</p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> <p><strong>Please include attribution to https://therapy-central.com with this graphic.</strong></p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> <p><a href=’https://therapy-central.com/2021/07/05/how-to-overcome-perfectionism-anxiety-with-cbt/’><img src=’https://therapy-central.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/Perfectionism-Anxiety-CBT-Infographic.png<span data-mce-type=”bookmark” style=”display: inline-block; width: 0px; overflow: hidden; line-height: 0;” class=”mce_SELRES_start”></span>’ alt=” 540px border=’0′ /></a></p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> <p>

The other major component of CBT is to examine behavioural tendencies resulting from perfectionistic thoughts. Although these behaviours might be an understandable response to difficult thoughts and emotions, they can make anxiety and stress worse and ultimately keep perfectionism going. Here are some examples of unhelpful behaviours:

  • Working very hard and for long hours
  • Not asking for help or delegating
  • Avoid saying no
  • Checking work several times (reading and re-reading an email/report many times)
  • Constantly correcting work
  • Procrastinating
  • Excessive Planning and Preparation
  • Excessive reassurance seeking

In CBT, your therapist will help you identify your behavioural tendencies and analyse the extent to which they are helping and whether they have any downsides. Then, overall, you will be able to determine whether it is good to keep up those behaviours, amend them, or completely stop them. If you choose to stop them altogether, your therapist will work to help you gradually reduce them if this is difficult to do straight away.

Testing New Responses with Behavioural Experiments

We have looked at thought challenging earlier. Another way to challenge thoughts is to test them out through ‘behavioural experiments’ or our actions. Here are some ways in which we can test our thoughts through our behaviours:

People who try this often discover that their troublesome thoughts turn out not to be true, and as a result, they lose strength over time.

Addressing the Challenges of Being an Over-Achiever

Perfectionists can tend to place a lot of emphasis on achievement at the detriment of other areas. When you do this, you put excessive time and energy into working hard to achieve things. However, this will add extra pressure on you. It can be particularly crushing if you face setbacks while you attempt to achieve something.  

If you recognise yourself in this, it can be helpful to list other areas in your life that give you fulfilment, for example, friends, family, hobbies, health, community, and spirituality. Then consider how much time and energy you are committing to these other areas.  

Ask yourself, could it be helpful to spend a little less time trying to achieve and, instead, spend more time and energy on these other areas of your life? If you decided to invest more in these different areas of your life, be careful not to bring the achievement element into them too much!  

Dealing with Perfectionism Anxiety with CBT in London & Online

Are you tired of spending sleepless nights thinking about work and your to-do list? Do you struggle to take in criticism even if it is constructive? Do you find it difficult to believe others when they congratulate you on your work? Do you notice not being able to celebrate your achievement and immediately start thinking about what to work on next? Are you tired of engaging in negative self-talk?

If you’re experiencing some of these issues, you may be struggling with perfectionism anxiety. Whether you’ve only recently started feeling this type of anxiety, or you feel like you’ve lived with it for your entire life, at Therapy Central, we have therapists who specialised in using CBT to treat perfectionism anxiety. We can provide you with the guidance and support you might need to take this definite change in your life, where you will be able to achieve and succeed without compromising your health, relationships, and general well-being. Contact us for a free 15 min consultation today to get started with CBT therapy .

  • Dr. Amy Smith

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End Homework Anxiety: Stress-Busting Techniques for Your Child

homework-anxiety-explained

Sometimes kids dread homework because they'd rather be outside playing when they're not at school. But, sometimes a child's resistance to homework is more intense than a typical desire to be having fun, and it can be actually be labeled as homework anxiety: a legitimate condition suffered by some students who feel intense feelings of fear and dread when it comes to doing homework. Read on to learn about what homework anxiety is and whether your child may be suffering from it.

What is Homework Anxiety?

Homework anxiety is a condition in which students stress about and fear homework, often causing them to put homework off until later . It is a self-exacerbating condition because the longer the student puts off the homework, the more anxiety they feel about it, and the more pressure they experience to finish the work with less time. Homework anxiety can cripple some kids who are perfectly capable of doing the work, causing unfinished assignments and grades that slip.

What Causes Homework Anxiety?

There are many causes of homework anxiety, and there can be multiple factors spurring feelings of fear and stress. Some common causes of homework anxiety include:

  • Other anxiety issues: Students who tend to suffer anxiety and worry, in general, can begin to associate anxiety with their homework, as well.
  • Fear of testing: Often, homework is associated with upcoming tests and quizzes, which affect grades. Students can feel pressure related to being "graded" and avoid homework since it feels weighty and important.
  • General school struggle: When students are struggling in school or with grades, they may feel a sense of anxiety about learning and school in general.
  • Lack of support: Without a parent, sibling, tutor, or other help at home, students may feel that they won't have the necessary support to complete an assignment.
  • Perfectionism: Students who want to perform perfectly in school may get anxious about completing a homework assignment perfectly and, in turn, procrastinate.

Basic Tips for Helping with Homework Anxiety

To help your child with homework anxiety, there are a few basic tips to try. Set time limits for homework, so that students know there is a certain time of the day when they must start and finish assignments. This helps them avoid putting off homework until it feels too rushed and pressured. Make sure your student has support available when doing their work, so they know they'll be able to ask for help if needed. Teaching your child general tips to deal with anxiety can also help, like deep breathing, getting out to take a short walk, or quieting racing thoughts in their mind to help them focus.

How can the Brain Balance Program Help with Homework Anxiety?

Extensive scientific research demonstrates that the brain is malleable, allowing for brain connectivity change and development and creating an opportunity for improvement at any age. Brain Balance has applied this research to develop a program that focuses on building brain connectivity and improving the foundation of development, rather than masking or coping with symptoms.

If you have a child or a teenager who struggles with homework anxiety, an assessment can help to identify key areas for improvement and create an action plan for you and your child. To get started, take our quick, free online assessment by clicking the link below. 

Get started with a plan for your child today.

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Perfectionism

10 signs of a problem with perfectionism , when good enough isn't good enough..

Posted September 29, 2021 | Reviewed by Chloe Williams

  • Perfectionism is not about striving for excellence but striving for the impossible, unattainable, and ultimately, unachievable.
  • Perfectionism increases the risk of health issues including eating disorders, anxiety disorders, pathological worry, and premature death.
  • Signs of perfectionism include negative self-talk, comparing oneself to others, and spending excessive time trying to achieve personal goals.

 Antonio Guillem/Shutterstock

It's not uncommon to hear people pridefully claim that they're perfectionists . "I can't help it; I'm a perfectionist!" It is no surprise that we all get pleasure out of doing things well. It makes us feel unique or "special." But when is being "too good" a bad thing?

Perfectionism is not about striving for excellence but striving for the impossible, unattainable, and ultimately, the unachievable. The truth is perfectionists play a losing game. The generally accepted definition of perfectionism is a disposition to regard anything short of perfection as unacceptable. However, the author of The Gift of Imperfection , Brene Brown, defines the trait best: "Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be your best. Perfectionism is the belief that if we live perfect, look perfect, and act perfect, we can minimize or avoid the pain of blame, judgment, and shame . It's a shield. It's a twenty-ton shield that we lug around thinking it will protect us when, in fact, it's the thing that's really preventing us from flight."

Bravo Brene and take that, Merriam-Webster. I would add that not only does it prevent us from "taking flight," but it shackles us to a laundry list of other mental health issues and disorders as we constantly pursue the phantom that is perfection.

Perfectionism and Mental Health

The chronic disappointment that results from perfectionism is exhausting, but it also puts us at risk for a myriad of other mental and physical health issues. Perfectionism has been found to increase risk for, and contribute to, the maintenance of eating disorders, anxiety disorders, and depression , poor physical health, premature death, pathological worry , and generalized anxiety disorder, and sadly, even suicidal ideation . Pioneers of perfectionism research even state that perfectionism can cause physical consequences such as fatigue, muscle tension, insomnia , and a tight chest.

Many people are under the misconception that if they are not perfectionists in all areas of their lives, they are not struggling with perfectionism. To the contrary, perfectionism can pop up in one area of your life and still cause enough distress to derail your mental well-being.

  • Housework/cleaning
  • Close relationships (family, partner, friends)
  • Physical appearance
  • Health and fitness

10 Signs You May Have a Problem with Perfectionism

1. Self-Criticism. Does the negative self-talk never seem to stop? Do you blame yourself for every situation? "I should have known better." "I'm so overweight." "How could I be so stupid?" "It's all my fault." "My hair is a mess." "I don't spend enough time with my friends." Do you mistakenly believe that beating yourself up is going to motivate you to do better? Achieve more? These toxic inner rumblings of your internal self-critic will only serve as the direct route to the downward spiral that is depression.

2. You Hold Yourself to a Different Standard . Do you hold yourself to a different set of expectations, rules, and standards than other people in your life? If your loved one made the same mistake, would it be "understandable"? If you were to imagine doing the same, would it be cataclysmic? No matter what you achieve or attain, is it never good enough?

3. Your Self-Worth Is Based on Achievements and Performance . Do you often equate mediocrity with inferiority? If you're not valedictorian, employee of the month (all 12 months of the year), CEO by 25, captain of the team, or accepted into an Ivy league, are you a total failure?

4. In a State of Constant Comparison to Others. Do you consistently catch yourself comparing your grades, home, car, material items, physical appearance, or job to other people? Comparison is the thief of joy. This practice is a one-way ticket to tumbling self-esteem .

5. You're a Perpetual Procrastinator . Does the fear of making one mistake prevent you from even starting? If you can't do it perfectly, why even bother, right? Is it challenging to meet deadlines or get yourself to sit down and begin? Does the thought of not being able to get the work done effortlessly terrify you? If so, perfectionism is at play.

6. It Takes You a Ton of Time to Finish Things. Do you spend an exorbitant amount of time on a project or task that should take 15 minutes? Ever excessively check emails, homework, papers for spelling mistakes? What about trying to improve things by redoing them, once, twice, ehh… maybe third times the charm?

7. You Have a Very Hard Time Relaxing. Even when you've finally crossed off task number 452 of the day from your color-coded, daily planner, do you still feel guilty or restless when it's time to put the pen down?

8. Excessive Time Spent on Achieving Personal Goals . Friends, family, or partners give up on asking you to spend time together because they know the answer is "I can't, I have work to do tonight." One of the tell-tale signs your perfectionism is pathological is that the long hours put in toward your goals inevitably start pulling you away from what you love.

homework anxiety perfectionism

9. Persistent Thoughts of "Not Being Good Enough." Not smart enough, athletic enough, pretty enough, skinny enough, ambitious enough? Unfortunately, these maladaptive beliefs stem from childhood experiences with family members, coaches, peers, teachers, etc. They consequently serve as the fuel that maintains perfectionism. It's best to reach out to a mental health professional to address and heal them once and for all.

10. It's Always "All or Nothing." If you received a 95 and not a 100 on an exam, would you dwell on the "catastrophe" for hours? Maybe even days? Even though 95 and 100 equate to the same letter grade? This extreme style of thinking (often associated with depressive thinking) is frequently responsible for determining whether or not you're a total success or a total failure when struggling with perfectionism. It's important to remember that life generally does not operate in absolutes. People are seldom "always this" or "never that." Situations are rarely perfect or a complete disaster.

If your child or someone else you know is having thoughts of suicide , contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255). If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call 911. Visit Psychology Today's Therapist Directory to find a mental health professional near you.

Martin, S. (2019). CBT Workbook for Perfectionism: Evidence-Based Skills to Help You Let Go of Self-Criticism, Build Self-Esteem, and Find Balance. New Harbinger Publications.

https://nopanic.org.uk/perfectionism/

Kailey Spina Horan, Ph.D., LMHC

Kailey Spina Horan, Ph.D., LMHC is the founder of True North Mental Health Counseling PLLC in Briarcliff Manor, NY, a practice dedicated to treating children, teens, young adults, and families.

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How to Prevent Anxiety From Causing Procrastination

homework anxiety perfectionism

Steven Gans, MD is board-certified in psychiatry and is an active supervisor, teacher, and mentor at Massachusetts General Hospital.

homework anxiety perfectionism

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How Anxiety Causes Procrastination

Dealing with perfectionism.

  • Coping When You're Overwhelmed

Overcoming Fear

Procrastination can be a common problem for many people with anxiety-related conditions, including panic disorder . There are numerous symptoms of panic disorder and common anxious personality traits that can contribute to procrastination.

Listed here are some obstacles that may get in the way of your progress toward your goals and responsibilities. Read through them and consider if you are allowing these potential roadblocks to lead to procrastination.

Anxiety can lead to procrastination for a number of different reasons. Some of these include:

Perfectionism

Having an anxiety disorder puts one at risk of perfectionism . While it might seem like this perfectionism is a positive attribute, having such high standards can increase the risk of procrastination. Perfectionism can cause you to:

  • Feel defeated when things don't turn out exactly how you wanted them
  • Put off tasks because you know you don't have the time or energy to do them to your standards
  • Engage in poor reasoning and self-talk, including the use of "should" statements (“I should complete this task perfectly or not at all.”)
  • Experience self-criticism that derails your efforts to achieve your goals

Worrying can also keep you from accomplishing your tasks and goals. Sometimes our worry about the end results will keep us from completing certain responsibilities.

For example, you may put off going through your bills out of worry about if you will be able to pay them. Perhaps you have been putting off certain self-care activities or talking to your doctor about panic disorder because you are nervous about the outcome of these tasks.

Perfectionism also can lead to procrastination when you need to have everything line up perfectly before you feel ready to work on a particular task. You may always be waiting for the “perfect time” to start working on a goal.

Feeling Overwhelmed

When faced with a large task, it is easy to feel discouraged by the amount of work ahead. Procrastination can be a sign that you simply don’t know where to begin. Putting things off may temporarily make you feel better, but in the long run, it will most likely add more stress and anxiety to your life.

Fear and Low Self-Esteem

Sometimes we are held back by our own negative beliefs and overpowering fears. People with anxiety disorders are often prone to poor self-esteem and can find it difficult to overcome negative thinking patterns.

Self-doubt and fear can make you feel that you will fail at reaching your goals. For example, you may jump to conclusions , believing that you don’t have the skills needed to accomplish your goals.

Fortunately, there are strategies you can use to help deal with worry and perfectionism that contribute to procrastination:

  • Don't wait for perfection: When you are dealing with anxiety, you might find yourself putting off tasks until you feel like you have all of the tools, information, or time to do them perfectly. By waiting for everything to be in order, you are actually putting off any progress and giving in to procrastination.
  • Notice your worries and perfectionist tendencies : To begin to move past these issues, start thinking about how worry and perfectionism may be holding you back.
  • Get comfortable with making mistakes : Give yourself permission to make some mistakes. Assess if perfection is necessary and even possible.
  • Tackle tasks instead of worrying about them : It can be helpful to just get started on a stressful task rather than continue to worry about it.

The more we put things off, the more anxious we begin to feel about them. Think about what tasks you have been avoiding and begin to take action towards completing them. You may be surprised by how less anxious you feel when you begin to work on your goals and responsibilities.

Coping When You're Overwhelmed

At times when you feel overwhelmed and uncertain of where to begin, just start somewhere.

Pick out one small thing that you can complete toward accomplishing your larger goal. It may be helpful to list out the many small steps that will lead up to accomplishing a greater task.

In order to get started:

  • Look at the big picture
  • Examine all of the steps that are involved in completing the task
  • Make a list of steps and the order in which they must be completed
  • Estimate how long each step will take
  • Set a timer and work on the project for a specific period of time
  • Write them down and track your progress

Goals often become much more manageable when you break them down into smaller parts.

To get past your personal fears or negative self-concepts, begin to assess if you really do not have the skill set needed to complete a specific task.

To get started, ask yourself these questions:

  • Can you learn and develop these necessary skills on your own?
  • Is there a way you can delegate your tasks?
  • Do you know anyone you can recruit to help out?
  • Is it possible to hire someone to assist with getting the job done?

For example, let's say you have a goal of doing more physical exercise , but fear and self-consciousness keep you from going to the gym. Is it possible that you can ask a trusted friend to go with you? Does the gym offer a guide or trainer to help you become more efficient in using the equipment? Or maybe you would be more comfortable exercising at home.

When fear and low self-esteem are leading to procrastination, try to push past negative thinking and find creative ways to accomplish your goals.

A Word From Verywell

Anxiety can contribute to procrastination for a variety of reasons. Perfectionism often plays a role, but sometimes people just feel overwhelmed by the task before them. Fear and poor self-esteem can also contribute to procrastination.

The problem with using procrastination as a way to avoid the things that are making you anxious is that it makes anxiety worse in the long-run. Instead of waiting until the last minute, and adding even more stress to your life, finding ways to deal with anxiety and overcome the urge to procrastinate is a more effective response.

Breaking up tasks into smaller steps and taking it one step at a time can be effective solutions, but experiment to find what works for you. Many people find that setting a time and just getting started can lead to the progress they need to lessen anxiety and get things done.

Press Play for Advice On Dealing With Procrastination

Hosted by therapist Amy Morin, LCSW, this episode of The Verywell Mind Podcast shares ways to stop procrastinating. Click below to listen now.

Follow Now : Apple Podcasts / Spotify / Google Podcasts / Amazon Music

Kelly J. Your best life: perfectionism--the bane of happiness . Clin Orthop Relat Res . 2015;473(10):3108-11. doi:10.1007%2Fs11999-015-4279-9

De palo V, Monacis L, Miceli S, Sinatra M, Di nuovo S. Decisional procrastination in academic settings: the role of metacognitions and learning strategies . Front Psychol . 2017;8:973. doi:10.3389%2Ffpsyg.2017.00973

Henriksen I, Ranøyen I, Indredavik M, Stenseng F. The role of self-esteem in the development of psychiatric problems: a three-year prospective study in a clinical sample of adolescents . Child Adolesc Psychiatry Ment Health . 2017;11:68. doi:10.1186%2Fs13034-017-0207-y

By Katharina Star, PhD Katharina Star, PhD, is an expert on anxiety and panic disorder. Dr. Star is a professional counselor, and she is trained in creative art therapies and mindfulness. 

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How to stop procrastinating on homework?

reviewed by Jo-ann Caballes

Created on Jun 05, 2024

Updated on June 5, 2024

homework anxiety perfectionism

Do you ever hear the dreaded “I can’t do this!” or the classic “I’ll do it later” when it comes to homework? All the moms have been there. According to the American Psychological Association , more than 80% of students procrastinate with their coursework. Later, this procrastination leads to learning struggles, lowering the child’s GPA.

In this article, we will explore the reasons for procrastination and how to deal with it. With Brighterly, you’ll overcome those challenges to achieve the maximum child’s productivity.

Why do some students procrastinate when they have to do homework?

  • Feeling overwhelmed
  • Perfectionism
  • Fear of failure
  • Lack of motivation
  • Distractions
  • Poor time management

A big assignment or a lot of homework from different classes can feel like a mountain to climb. Students might not know where to start or how to do their homework perfectly, which can lead to choice paralysis and homework procrastination.

Some people are so worried about getting a bad grade that they avoid doing the work altogether. It often happens with adults, so it’s just as possible with your child.

If your child is just spinning in circles from boredom, they are definitely not interested in homework

Stop procrastinating homework with Bridgterly

Brighterly tutors understand the struggles of young students and the reasons behind their procrastination. We will create a tailored curriculum for your child, adapting to their needs. It will be beneficial for 7th graders who may be struggling with specific concepts or want to move ahead on topics they grasp easily.

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Improve your child’s math skill today with Brighterly.

Let them be at the top of their class.

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Our tutors emphasize a hands-on, interactive learning approach. This can make math more for teenagers and help to develop a deeper understanding of the concepts. Brighterly tutors focus on problem-solving, which is a crucial skill in math. Students won’t just learn formulas; they’ll practice applying them to solve real-world problems.

Erin Beers,  7th grade language arts teacher and resource creator from Cincinnati, supports the same studying approach:

“As a middle school teacher, I work with a wide array of different learners, and these simple strategies work well with procrastinating students”

Author Erin Beers

Causes of homework procrastination

Two main reasons for procrastination are task aversiveness (e.g., a task being perceived as boring or unpleasant), and timing of rewards and punishments (e.g., a task having rewards or punishments that are far in the future).

Therefore, it’s natural that students don’t want to spend their time on a boring task that they don’t understand how it will apply to their lives. Considering the fact that we live in a world of distractions, boring homework is the last thing that a child wants to see.

Dr. James A. Barham, an education expert and the Senior Vice President of Academic Influence, confirms it with his vast experience.

“The key to figuring out how to stop procrastinating homework is to understand why it happens in the first place.”

Author Dr. James A. Barham

Another common reason for procrastinating on homework is undiagnosed learning difficulties. Multiple researches show that ADHD is one of the most common neurodiverse conditions that affects productivity. Individuals with ADHD have difficulty delaying gratification and shift responding to a variety of tasks often resulting in inaccuracy.

How does procrastination affect students?

Procrastination affects students by drastically lowering their grades. Procrastination among undergraduate students leads to an average 2.2% lower GPA.

Other effects of procrastination included but were not limited to:

  • Stress and anxiety. The looming pressure of unfinished work creates a constant feeling of unease. Students who procrastinate often experience heightened stress and anxiety levels, which negatively impact their well-being.
  • Sleep deprivation. Cramming all night to meet deadlines takes a toll on sleep. This sleep deprivation leads to difficulty focusing in class, decreased energy levels, and poorer overall health.
  • Time management issues. Procrastination supports poor time management habits. Students who get used to procrastinating homework, transfer this habit into adulthood.
  • Lower self-esteem: The cycle of procrastination, missed deadlines, and lower grades can damage a student’s confidence. This can lead to a negative attitude towards school and a reluctance to take on new challenges.

How many high school students procrastinate?

A study by Magoosh shows that 86% of high schoolers procrastinate on assignments. However, you don’t need to panic, as it’s just a part of human behavior.

If your child doesn’t  find strategies to overcome procrastination while young, they may continue to suffer from it during adulthood

Varsha Naik, DP Math Teacher at School Lane Charter School, saw hundreds of procrastinating high schoolers grow up into successful adults. She refers to the main trick to beat procrastination is to find student’s motivation:

“I have been teaching high school mathematics; my students usually procrastinate because they are teenagers. In my opinion, the child should be so important to properly understand the content.”

Author Varsha Naik

What can procrastination lead to?

Procrastination leads to a cascade of negative consequences, such as academic problems, sleep deprivation, and workplace procrastination once students get older and find their first job.

Students procrastinating on homework often face the brunt of the impact. Rushed work, missed deadlines, and forgotten assignments can lead to plummeting grades and academic disappointment.  The looming shadow of unfinished tasks casts a long shadow of stress and anxiety. It will lead to low self-confidence, task aversion, distractibility, impulsivity, and even sleep deprivation.

Make a consistent learning routine. Otherwise, your child may stuck in a self-doubting loop

The effects of procrastination on students can linger into adulthood. According to recent statistics , 42.6% of adults procrastinate daily, spending 218 minutes on nothing. It impacts their work performance and relationship with colleagues, which may be reflected by getting a lower salary.

How to stop procrastinating on homework

It’s achievable to stop procrastinating on homework, even the boring one. Use this instruction to beat this habit.

1. Identify the child’s triggers

What makes them ditch homework? Is it a specific subject? Feeling overwhelmed? Determine those triggers and try to remove them from the child’s life.

If they are triggered by distractions, ensure that you study in a quiet room. If the students ditch math because they don’t understand it, find out their knowledge gaps and ensure that a child fully understands previous material.

2.  Create a to-do list for their math homework

Break down large assignments into smaller, more manageable tasks.

Let your child incorporate the “art of doing nothing” into their schedule

You can also use the Pomodoro technique, where the learner will study for 30 minutes and relax for 5-10 minutes. Once a child finishes some part of the task, let them rest. That way you make kids relax more predictable and less procrastinate.

You don’t procrastinate if you fit this relaxation into your schedule. To stop procrastinating on homework, a child should find out their own patterns and include resting times in it.

3. Prime the environment

Find a quiet, distraction-free zone to work in. You and the child should both silence your computers’ and phones’ notifications and avoid having tempting tabs. Remove posters and anything that can distract you or your child from studying.

4. Reward even the smallest victories

It will motivate a student to keep going. If it is within your budget, it can be literally anything that your kid likes. You can reward small and big victories, such as pizza for good grades this month, a new PS4 game for a B+ annual test, or a Disneyland trip for an A+ SAT test . Determine what your kid likes and define your own reward system.

Pavan Sampath, the COO and Managing Partner of Ascend Now, uses the next tricks to motivate his students.

“One method we use with our students was developed by famous author Raymond Charles, called the Nothing Alternative.”

Humans hate boredom. That’s why we have magazines in the waiting room. It's boring to do absolutely nothing. After a certain point, doing nothing (staring at a wall) seems more tedious than finishing up homework.

It launches a mental contrasting phenomenon, where your mind automatically compares your state of doing nothing to doing homework and realizes that doing homework seems like the more salient and positive choice.

Author Pavan Sampath

How to stop procrastinating for students?

To stop students’ procrastination, identify their triggers and remove them. After that, craft a schedule to treat homework time like an important appointment. Break down large assignments into smaller, more manageable tasks. 

How to not procrastinate on homework if it’s too boring?

To ensure that the child doesn’t procrastinate with boring homework, find relevance to real-world applications and think of ways to make this task more interactive and fun. Use the Pomodoro technique and reward the child even with the smallest progress. Change the scenery to refresh the student’s mind and make the work feel less monotonous.

Procrastination impact not only grades but student’s well-being and overall academic success. Understanding the reasons behind procrastination, such as feeling overwhelmed, perfectionism, or simply distractions, is the first step to overcoming it.

Effective strategies on how to not procrastinate on homework include creating a schedule, chunking down assignments, setting realistic goals, and rewarding yourself can equip students with the tools to slay the procrastination monster.

Brighterly tutoring can be a valuable weapon in this arsenal. Our certified tutors provide a tailored curriculum to meet student’s needs with productive yet engaging lessons. Book the first free lesson today to see the first results tomorrow!

Author Jessica Kaminski

Jessica is a a seasoned math tutor with over a decade of experience in the field. With a BSc and Master’s degree in Mathematics, she enjoys nurturing math geniuses, regardless of their age, grade, and skills. Apart from tutoring, Jessica blogs at Brighterly. She also has experience in child psychology, homeschooling and curriculum consultation for schools and EdTech websites.

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homework anxiety perfectionism

The Anxious Perfectionist – Is Perfectionism a Symptom of Anxiety?

homework anxiety perfectionism

You’re a perfectionist. I get it. You want everything to be done just the right way. If it’s not, the whole thing went to hell. It’s like when you need to load the dishwasher and your partner doesn’t rinse the dishes enough to get the food off. They didn’t do it perfectly, and so you take it upon yourself to do it the “right” way.

To prevent you from burning out by doing everything yourself, think about the fact that you might be an anxious perfectionist . Do those dishes really need to be scrubbed clean before they go into the dishwasher? How does it make you feel to sit with the idea of not doing all of the dishes or leaving it for someone else? Does it leave you feeling terrible somehow? I guess I’m wondering – Is perfectionism a symptom of anxiety?

But scrubbing those dishes yourself, you send a message to your partner that they're not good enough. You also reinforce your behavior of trying to make everything perfect. By doing everything yourself, it doesn’t help your partner learn how to do things and you're not giving yourself the opportunity to see that it’s ok for them to do things differently.

Think about this for a second – how might perfectionism lead to anxiety? In the time you spent scrubbing those dishes you could have been relaxing or meditating or exercising. Or you could have been hanging out with your partner, rather than taking over so that the dishes were done perfectly.

is perfectionism and symptoms of anxiety

The Anxious Perfectionist

First things first – let’s define perfectionism. Perfectionism is the desire to be perfect and flawless in every aspect of a person’s life. Perfectionists set incredibly high standards that are sometimes impossible to meet. 

Growing up you were probably told that perfection doesn’t exist. When you hear that message over and over, you start to correct yourself. This makes it hard to recognize perfectionism. You tell yourself that you need to make things “good enough,” which is just another way to label perfectionism.

Perfectionism can be useful in high-performing jobs, getting tasks done well at work, and when it acts as a motivator to do your best. The problem with perfectionism is that it can set you up for failure. If you don’t meet the incredibly high standards you set for yourself, you’ll feel as if you failed and everything went to shit. Even if you meet your lofty goals, the goalposts get moved. There’s always another reason you feel that you have to do more. And that’s where the anxious perfectionist in you comes out.

Perfectionism is a personality trait. When you take on a perfectionistic role, you’re setting yourself up for a world of anxiety. You may not even realize that you’re an anxious perfectionist. But the question is – is perfectionism a symptom of anxiety?

I believe that it is. 

Anxious perfectionists don’t know how to relax and take life at a “normal” pace. When a perfectionist doesn’t reach their goals, they get frustrated and upset. Often they might feel anger or even rage. These emotions are usually disproportionate to the task at hand, but to the anxious perfectionist, they’re everything.

Is Perfectionism a Symptom of Anxiety?

People with anxiety disorders tend to be perfectionists. As I mentioned, perfectionism is a personality trait. It’s how you function in the world. Anxiety happens to be the underlying reason why you might be a perfectionist.

Generally speaking, perfectionists are anxious. That’s why I’ve been referring to the anxious perfectionist. Anxiety can creep up on you. You may not realize that you’re anxious, but you notice that you panic more often. Maybe your heart races or you can feel your pulse just sitting still. These are physical manifestations of anxiety. 

The psychological manifestations of anxiety include feeling on edge or wound-up, tension, irritability, and difficulty controlling worrying thoughts. 

Most perfectionists struggle with anxiety. Anxiety can take many forms including generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder, and obsessive-compulsive disorder.

You became a perfectionist because you never learned how to cope with the distress that anxiety causes. Perfectionism is your coping mechanism when anxiety is winning the battle, and you try to win the war by being the best damn employee/partner/parent/person the world has ever seen. That’s a lot of pressure and a lot of anxiety to manage.

how might perfectionism lead to anxiety

How Might Perfectionism Lead to Anxiety?

Because perfectionism is a personality trait, it’s very possible that someone who is a perfectionist becomes anxious as a result. However, that anxiety was probably already hiding its sneaky little self in your brain and was activated by the anxious perfectionist that is you.

If you’re a perfectionist, you might tend to procrastinate or have a hard time focusing on just one thing because you feel the need to do everything. Underneath all of that procrastination and hyperactivity is anxiety. To borrow from the song Santa Claus is Coming to Town, “it sees you when you’re sleeping, it knows when you’re awake. It knows if you’ve been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake!” In this case, “it” is anxiety. 

When you read those lyrics out loud, they scream anxious perfectionist to me. How might perfectionism lead to anxiety? Absorbing messages like that. We’re taught from a young age that if we work hard and get good grades we’ll be successful. You learn that you can’t strive for perfection, so you learn other ways to talk to yourself about it. This makes it harder to learn that you’re being a perfectionist. Anxiety is a sea monster just waiting to sink its claws into you and drag you into the depths of the ocean. But there are ways to stop that from happening.

Pay attention to your perfectionistic tendencies. Are you trying to control everything around you so that’s it done just the right way? Are you trying to control the people around you for the same reasons? Notice when you feel wound up and on edge. See if you can connect the dots between your perfectionistic qualities and the anxiety you feel. 

Perfectionists “yeah, but” a lot. You might say “I know I can’t control everything, but…” Adding the word “but” makes it harder to figure out if you’re a perfectionist. You recognize what you can’t control, and you try anyway.

To work on your perfectionism and anxiety, you might want to try therapy. Seeing a therapist isn’t awful and it doesn’t mean you failed. When you feel you have to be perfect, seeing a therapist might feel like proof that you’re not perfect. But therapy is for everybody , and all of us need help. 

Therapy and Coaching Can Help You Answer the Question “How Might Perfectionism Lead to Anxiety?”

Still not sure whether you’re an anxious perfectionist? Consider therapy – I can help you work through your symptoms and come up with coping strategies to manage perfectionistic tendencies and how they relate to anxiety. During our work together, you’ll learn how to manage your anxiety and perfectionism. We’ll come up with coping skills to deal with your symptoms and help you step confidently into the world knowing what you’re dealing with and how you can manage it.

I also offer a coaching program for perfectionists that is designed to give you support and guidance around feeling good enough in your professional and personal life – no matter where you live. If you want help overcoming the belief that you have to constantly achieve in order to be worthwhile – and this belief is making you suffer – coaching is for you. I’m ready if you are. Reach out today to get started.

Danielle Wayne

Danielle is an anxiety therapist and perfectionism coach. She specializes in helping busy millennials dial down their anxiety and ADHD, so they can perform at their best. Danielle has been featured on Apartment Therapy, SparkPeople, Lifewire, and Now Art World. When Danielle isn't helping her clients, she's playing video games or spending time with her partner and step children.

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homework anxiety perfectionism

Perfectionism Vs. High-Functioning Anxiety: A Therapist Breaks Down The Differences

I n the age of social media, it doesn't take long to find countless videos of people talking about their respective journeys with high-functioning anxiety. This term typically describes someone who suffers from anxiety but generally conceals it. According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness , over 40 million adults in the U.S. suffer from a form of anxiety. With these high percentages of numbers, it's no wonder that many have their own stories and journeys to share.

Another term that tends to pop up on social media often is perfectionism. Although perfectionism isn't a classified mental illness, it can make one's quality of life more challenging. Perfectionism is the strong desire to avoid failing and judging oneself or others for making a mistake, according to Psychology Today . Although perfectionism and high-functioning anxiety are eerily similar, they have a few differences, especially in how they relate. To give us the complete lowdown on both, we exclusively turned to Lindsey Bass, an LGBTQ+ therapist specializing in anxiety at Linden Tree Counseling , to explain these terms and what makes them different.

What Is Perfectionism?

Being a perfectionist is complex. Although it's valued in society because many associate perfectionism with success and hard-working traits, it has its challenges that can lower your quality of life. Before knowing whether or not you're a perfectionist, it's essential to know that it's not a term used in diagnosing someone; rather, it's a trait. 

"In psychology, perfectionism is considered a personality trait that varies from person to person, just like extroversion," Lindsey Bass exclusively tells us. "Some people have more of the trait ('perfectionists') and some less (non-perfectionists). Because it's a variable trait, researchers have also conceptualized a few different forms of perfectionism as well, which may or may not align with what we generally tend to think of [as] 'perfectionists.'" 

Like other similar traits, there are various degrees of perfectionism, and not everyone who is a perfectionist is the same. Some target their perfectionism toward themselves, while others target it at others. As Bass explains, self-orientated perfectionism is the most common type of perfectionism and involves pressuring oneself to be the best at all times — and in everything they do. Other-orientated perfectionism pressures others to succeed and avoid failing or making mistakes. 

What Is High-Functioning Anxiety?

On the other hand, high-functioning anxiety relates to those who suffer from a type of diagnosable anxiety. However, as Lindsey Bass notes, high-functioning isn't a medical term or an official standard used to categorize anxiety. It simply describes someone with anxiety that rarely shows their symptoms in public. Whether it's a coping mechanism or pressure, those with high-functioning anxiety appear to be fine even though they're feeling anxious on the inside. "People with high functioning anxiety may have learned to cope by focusing on the outside world rather than their internal experiences, but in doing so may become anxious about their performance, which is why many descriptions of high functioning anxiety include perfectionism," Bass exclusively explains to Glam.

Nevertheless, high-functioning anxiety is just as dangerous as anxiety that can be seen. "Although these individuals may look put together and be able to accomplish everyday tasks, they still struggle with the same symptoms of anxiety internally — frequent worry, difficulty stopping or controlling worry, restless, and difficulty falling or staying asleep among them," according to Bass. That said, because high-functioning anxiety is concealed and isn't presented with any obvious signs, it can be tricky to know whether a person is suffering on the inside. Unless the other person discusses their anxiety, many people around you could be experiencing high-functioning anxiety without your knowledge.

Differences Between Perfectionism And High-Functioning Anxiety

Although they aren't the same, there's a link between perfectionism and high-functioning anxiety. " Research demonstrates that perfectionism and anxiety (as well as other mental health conditions) are related," Bass exclusively shares with us. "If someone has high levels of perfectionism, particularly if they are concerned about others' expectations for them, that there is a tendency to experience more overall psychological distress, including anxious and depressive symptoms." As Bass notes, it's difficult to often separate the two since they are often revolved around the same concept and can correlate to one another. Even though there's no direct linkage between the two, it's often believed that finding one means finding the other. However, there are a few instances in which this isn't always the case.

"It isn't a perfect correlation where all perfectionists are anxious, and all anxious people are perfectionists," notes Bass. "Perfectionists who can concentrate on what they have achieved and focus on self-improvement rather than thinking about what could have gone better if everything had worked out perfectly  tended to have lower levels of anxiety than not only more rigid perfectionists but non-perfectionists as well ." On that same note, those with high-functioning anxiety might not be as worried about the quality of their work but rather about completing their deadlines. Knowing these differences can make it easier to pinpoint the areas that need working on and help find the balance between productivity and a healthy mindset.

Dealing With Perfectionism And High-Functioning Anxiety

No matter the mental health issues or complicated situations you may be dealing with, it's always important to know what it is that's going on rather than suffering mysteriously. The first step in dealing with perfectionism and/or high-functioning anxiety is knowing what you are suffering from. Like other anxiety disorders, those with high-functioning anxiety can find support and help via therapy and other lifestyle changes, per Banner Health . Setting up a routine, getting enough sleep, and exercising are small and simple ways to improve your anxiety enough to the point where you can succeed.

If you're looking to combat your perfectionism, you may want to start by setting realistic goals and expectations for yourself. After all, perfectionism can start to take over when you set unrealistic standards for yourself that can't be met at a reasonable time. "Even if someone with high functioning anxiety has higher levels of perfectionism, as long as they view themselves with self-compassion and remember that they have opportunities to learn and improve, they can avoid the more maladaptive forms of perfectionism," Lindsey Bass exclusively explains to Glam. You can also utilize resources like therapy to help come down to the root of your perfectionism and the emotions behind it, according to Oregon Counseling . "It may sound simpler than it is, but with practice and support, people with either maladaptive perfectionism and/or high-functioning anxiety can thrive," concludes Bass.

Read this next: 12 Ways To Show Yourself Self-Love Each Week

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  4. Signs of Perfectionism in Children (And How Parents Can Help)

    homework anxiety perfectionism

  5. The Perfectionism Workbook for Teens : Activities to Help You Reduce

    homework anxiety perfectionism

  6. Perfectionism: Why Children with Learning Challenges Struggle with

    homework anxiety perfectionism

VIDEO

  1. Becca’s social anxiety story

  2. Life beyond social anxiety

  3. You Don't Have to be Perfect: How to Overcome Perfectionism

  4. Help! Gaga Baby's Homework Anxiety #googoocolors #googoogaga #shortvideo #kidsvideo #kids

  5. Why perfectionism stops us

  6. Episode 9: What Is Overthinking??

COMMENTS

  1. How to Overcome Perfectionism: 15 Worksheets & Resources

    The effect of meditation on self-reported measures of stress, anxiety, depression, and perfectionism in a college population. Journal of College Student Psychotherapy, 25(2), 132-144. Curran, T., & Hill, A. P. (2019). Perfectionism is increasing over time: A meta-analysis of birth cohort differences from 1989 to 2016.

  2. Homework anxiety: Why it happens and how to help

    Use a calm voice. When kids feel anxious about homework, they might get angry, yell, or cry. Avoid matching their tone of voice. Take a deep breath and keep your voice steady and calm. Let them know you're there for them. Sometimes kids just don't want to do homework. They complain, procrastinate, or rush through the work so they can do ...

  3. Perfectionism and Anxiety: Why They're Linked and Ways to Cope

    Whichever factor relates to you, know that it's possible to learn to cope with perfectionism. The first step is recognizing it. Signs of perfectionism: rigid thinking. competitiveness ...

  4. 10 Tips for Treating Academic Perfectionism

    Here are 10 tips we hope will assist students, parents, and therapists contending with the challenges of DAP: Provide the student with a healthy alternative to perfectionism. Many perfectionists believe the only alternative to striving for perfection is to become irresponsible and unproductive. It is therefore helpful to show students a ...

  5. Perfectionism and Anxiety

    It's a complicated dance, but perfectionism can act as both a cause and symptom of anxiety disorders. Happiness and anxiety don't make good bedmates, however. According to research in the ...

  6. Homework Anxiety: It's Real! Why it Happens and How to Help

    Homework anxiety can start in the lower grades and affect any kid. This challenge is particularly difficult for a child who is already struggling in school. ... For kids who have a hard time managing emotions, homework can be a stress trigger too. Perfectionism can be another factor; kids who do very well in a particular subject may worry that ...

  7. A Beginner's Guide to Overcoming Perfectionism

    Quotes for Overcoming Perfectionism. "Perfectionism is the art of never being satisfied.". Unknown. "Have no fear of perfection - you'll never reach it.". Salvador Dali. "Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to do our best. Perfectionism is not about healthy achievement and growth; it's a shield.". -Brené Brown.

  8. Three Practical Tips to Overcome Perfectionism

    Perfectionism is associated with emotional difficulties, such as anxiety. Perfectionism is not a catalyst, but a barrier to success. "All of nothing" thinking is a hallmark of perfectionism ...

  9. PDF How to Overcome Perfectionism

    a) Realistic thinking. Because adults with perfectionism are often very critical of themselves, one of the most effective ways to overcome perfectionism is to replace self-critical or perfectionistic thoughts with more realistic and helpful statements. It is a good idea to practise these helpful statements regularly.

  10. How to Overcome Perfectionism

    I suggested that irrational and demanding rules for yourself lead to more self-criticism and that replacing self-criticism with self-correction, learning, and acceptance can go a long way toward ...

  11. What is perfectionism and how do I overcome it?

    a) Realistic thinking. Because adults with perfectionism are often very critical of themselves, one of the most effective ways to overcome perfectionism is to replace self-critical or perfectionistic thoughts with more realistic and helpful statements. It is a good idea to practise these helpful statements regularly.

  12. Perfectionism

    Traits of perfectionism are linked to mental health issues like anxiety, obsessive-compulsive behavior, and stress as well as negative emotions like worry, fear of negative judgement, and ...

  13. What is Perfectionism?

    Perfectionism is the belief that everything must be perfect all the time. A perfectionist sets impossible goals, and feels crushed when they are not achieved. Alternatively, someone who strives to do their best sets challenging but achievable goals. Those with perfectionistic tendencies are often resistant to change, believing these tendencies ...

  14. Perfectionism Self-Help Resources

    Many people with perfectionism having difficulties with excessive worry. If you find it hard to switch off from worries and negative thinking you might find our worry resources helpful. Self-help resources for perfectionism, written by clinical psychologists at the Centre for Clinical Interventions in Perth, Western Australia.

  15. How to Overcome Perfectionism Anxiety with CBT

    These will target the thoughts and actions that keep you stuck in a cycle of perfectionism anxiety. For example, one of the most common techniques, known as 'thought challenging', aims to rebalance unhelpful thinking styles. Thought Challenging to Help with Perfectionism Anxious Thoughts. A significant component of CBT involves examining an ...

  16. Signs of Perfectionism in Children (And How Parents Can Help)

    When Perfectionism Turns Into Anxiety, Child Therapy Can Help. Perhaps unsurprisingly, perfectionist kids are prone to developing anxiety and depression. Sometimes, perfectionism can be the first sign of a mental health disorder like OCD, which can involve repeating things, checking work, and recurring worries about mistakes.

  17. PDF Cognitive*BehavioralTherapyfor ! Perfectionism!

    Disorders associated with perfectionism (e.g., depression, anxiety disorder, eating disorders) are moderately heritable. ! The trait of perfectionism has been found to be ... Ensure clear expectation that homework will be completed ! Begin each session with review of homework ! Avoid being punitive for failure to complete homework

  18. PDF Helping Your Child Overcome Perfectionism

    Step 1: Educate your child about perfectionism: First, talk to your child about perfectionism. Help him or her understand that perfectionism makes us overly critical of ourselves and others. This may make us unhappy and anxious about trying new things. Perfectionism makes it difficult to finish tasks, and can be frustrating for everyone in the ...

  19. End Homework Anxiety: Stress-Busting Techniques for Your Child

    This helps them avoid putting off homework until it feels too rushed and pressured. Make sure your student has support available when doing their work, so they know they'll be able to ask for help if needed. Teaching your child general tips to deal with anxiety can also help, like deep breathing, getting out to take a short walk, or quieting ...

  20. 10 Signs of a Problem with Perfectionism

    Perfectionism increases the risk of health issues including eating disorders, anxiety disorders, pathological worry, and premature death. Signs of perfectionism include negative self-talk ...

  21. How to Overcome Panic-Related Procrastination

    In order to get started: Look at the big picture. Examine all of the steps that are involved in completing the task. Make a list of steps and the order in which they must be completed. Estimate how long each step will take. Set a timer and work on the project for a specific period of time.

  22. How to stop procrastinating on homework?

    Stress and anxiety. The looming pressure of unfinished work creates a constant feeling of unease. Students who procrastinate often experience heightened stress and anxiety levels, which negatively impact their well-being. Sleep deprivation. Cramming all night to meet deadlines takes a toll on sleep.

  23. The Anxious Perfectionist

    The psychological manifestations of anxiety include feeling on edge or wound-up, tension, irritability, and difficulty controlling worrying thoughts. Most perfectionists struggle with anxiety. Anxiety can take many forms including generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder, and obsessive-compulsive disorder.

  24. Help Me Moderate My Kid's Perfectionism

    3. Be careful with the expectations you place on your child. Children are perceptive, so even if you don't tell them you're disappointed in their B-, odds are, they'll see your true feelings ...

  25. Perfectionism Vs. High-Functioning Anxiety: A Therapist Breaks ...

    Like other anxiety disorders, those with high-functioning anxiety can find support and help via therapy and other lifestyle changes, per Banner Health. Setting up a routine, getting enough sleep ...