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8 Qualities of a Good Coach – How to Be Truly Exceptional

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The coaching industry has exploded with new talent, focusing not only on personal growth but also on a holistic approach to development. Yet, it’s difficult to measure the number of exceptional coaches in the world today…coaches who make way for massive impact and transformation in their clients’ lives. This brings us to explore the essential coaching attributes, qualities of an effective coach, traits of a good coach, and what makes a great coach in business.

One thing is for certain though, almost every coach is always looking to be a better version of themselves and do a better job for their clients. Learning from more experienced peers, getting formal training, tracking self-improvement across engagements, and more.

Different coaches have different approaches, methodologies, styles, and ideologies with which they craft their own unique manner of coaching. But there are some characteristics of a coach that (ideally) are essential. Every coach should possess – or at least aim to cultivate these coaching attributes and qualities of an effective coach – in order to show up for clients and deliver optimal coaching results.

We’ve curated a list of 8 qualities of a coach that we believe are a must-have, reflecting the traits of a good coach and underscoring what makes a great coach in business. Let’s dive deeper!

1. Driven

This is perhaps one of the most important characteristics of a good coach. As a self-start kind of profession, unlike a salaried position in an organisation, coaching requires a coach to have a drive and appetite to succeed in the industry.

Largely, people become coaches and start their own practice or business – something that comes with a lot of uncertainty and ups & downs. A salaried job provides a certain stability to an individual, and having one’s own practice can be rather unpredictable. Without the necessary drive and strong reason as to ‘why’ a coach chooses to be a coach, it can become rather apparent in the way they show up for their clients (half-heartedly, for instance), which is a lose-lose situation for both the coach and the client.

2. Non-judgmental

Imagine a coach being judgmental!

The entire premise of coaching, and also how it differs significantly from other similar practises such as mentoring, consulting, and counselling, is that it believes that the client has the ability to come up with their own solutions to problems and assess what is right or wrong for them. So, if a coach were to bring in their judgement about what they believe the client should do or how they ought to think, then they would no longer be coaching.

Keeping their judgments and beliefs aside and listening to the client from a neutral place is a much-needed quality for a coach.

3. Compassionate

An individual or a group of people can never truly open up to their coach if the coach can’t hold space for their clients and show empathy towards them as well as their unique situations and difficulties. Even if they have not gone through what the client has faced (or is facing), it is vital that the coach is able to step into the client’s shoes and look at things from their perspective.

Without the coach being understanding, kind, and uplifting towards the client, a coaching engagement and journey can never be truly successful.

4. Curious

Even though the coach is supposed to serve as the ‘expert’ guide to their clients, a ‘been there, done that’ kind of attitude may not necessarily contribute positively to the coaching session and engagement.

For the coach to be able to truly be present for their clients, each situation would need to be addressed and looked at from a clean slate. Which means that the path or manner taken to address one client’s situation may not work for another client and thus having a ‘curiosity’ mindset can prevent a coach from falling into the trap of copy-pasting a strategy or approach for someone else.

Another aspect of being curious is for the coach to also always have a ‘learner’ mindset. That means understanding that learning is never fully complete and to regularly take the time to upgrade their skills and credentials with the help of trainings and workshops in order to show up better for the client.

5. Observant

One of the essential skills and qualities of a coach is to be extremely observant of the client in front of them. Without being observant of not just what is being said verbally, but also being aware of the non-verbal cues, is an important skill for a coach to cultivate.

Not all clients are going to be expressive and communicative. By observing and silently making note of non-verbal cues such as body language, facial expressions, eye movements, hand gestures, and even the smallest of twitches and flutters, a coach can know a lot more about the client in front of them than what they’d consciously tell them.

6. Authentic

One of the most underrated characteristics of a coach, authenticity is not only vital in any coach-client relationship but can be the difference between a good vs an exceptional experience for the client. In a coach-client relationship, there is this expectation for the coach to be the ‘expert’ and there is thus the added expectation that they must know it all and have solutions for every problem. But there are times when a coach doesn’t know or have an answer – and in those instances, to be able to let the client know the same with utmost honesty and humility is what sets a good coach apart.

Another situation in which authenticity is paramount is when a coach feels, due to whatever reason, that they are not the right fit for the client – even after they have been coaching them for a while. In that case, the coach should be able to tell the client that they will not be able to continue with them and if possible, refer them to another professional who they feel might be a better fit. This serves in the best interest of the individual and that is, after all, what every coach wants for their clients!

7. Professional

There are times in a coach-client relationship when the client becomes immensely grateful for the way the coach has opened their mind about several things and enabled change for the better. The client may also feel a sense of comfort and relief being able to share many aspects of their personal and professional life with the coach – which they are not able to talk about with anyone else. No matter how comfortable and easy it gets with a coach, a professional front must always be maintained between a coach and a client.

The coach can act as a sounding board, a guiding hand, but the boundaries should never get crossed by becoming over-familiar with the client or becoming a ‘friend’ to them, wherein the dynamics of the relationship change. The coach can be friendly , but not become an actual friend – at least within the duration of the coaching engagement. To maintain the professional dynamic is important for the sanctity of the work that needs to happen.

8. Trustworthy

A major component of coaching is to provide an environment of trust to the client to help them open up and feel safe in doing so. Asserting that everything that the client shares in the coaching session is absolutely confidential and taking care to stick to that promise is an absolutely necessary quality for a coach to possess. Being trustworthy is one of the most (maybe even the most) important characteristics of a good coach.

Building trust is continuous process in coaching and a coach can cultivate it in a multitude of ways including: demonstrating sincere curiosity & interest, reassuring confidentiality, building rapport through body language (mirroring, tonality, etc.), being 100 percent present, being non-judgmental, being reliable & accountable by being true to your words and following through on your actions, and more.

1. What defines a driven coach, and why is this quality important?

A driven coach is defined by their unwavering commitment to their own professional growth and the success of their clients. This quality is important because it fuels the coach’s motivation to continually improve, seek out new knowledge, and adapt to each client’s unique needs. Their drive ensures they persist through the challenges of coaching, innovate in their methods, and strive for excellence in their practice. This relentless pursuit of growth not only enhances their own skills but also significantly impacts the lives of those they coach, fostering transformations that lead to fulfilling outcomes.

2. How does being non-judgmental contribute to a coach’s effectiveness?

Being non-judgmental contributes to a coach’s effectiveness by creating a safe and open environment where clients feel valued and understood. This quality encourages clients to express their thoughts, beliefs, and emotions without fear of criticism or dismissal. When coaches listen with an open mind, they can better understand the client’s perspective and tailor their guidance to suit the client’s individual journey. This fosters a strong coach-client partnership grounded in trust, which is essential for facilitating meaningful change and progress.

3. Why is compassion considered a crucial quality for good coaching?

Compassion is considered a crucial quality for good coaching because it enables coaches to connect with their clients on a deeper emotional level, demonstrating understanding and empathy for their situations. This emotional connection is vital for building trust and rapport, which are foundational elements of a productive coaching relationship. Compassionate coaches can provide the support and encouragement needed to navigate the challenges and setbacks that often accompany personal and professional growth, making the coaching journey a more supportive and enriching experience.

4. In what ways does curiosity enhance a coach’s ability to support their clients?

Curiosity enhances a coach’s ability to support their clients by fostering a mindset of exploration and discovery. A curious coach asks open-ended questions, actively listens to their client’s responses, and seeks to understand their perspective without making assumptions. This approach encourages clients to reflect deeply on their experiences and challenges, leading to self-discovery and personal insights. Curiosity also keeps the coach engaged and adaptable, ready to explore new strategies and solutions that align with the client’s evolving goals and needs.

5. How does an observant coach improve the coaching experience?

An observant coach improves the coaching experience by paying close attention to both verbal and non-verbal cues, which can reveal underlying emotions, beliefs, and contradictions that the client may not be consciously aware of. By noticing subtle changes in body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions, a coach can gain deeper insights into the client’s internal state and tailor their approach to address the client’s true needs and concerns. This level of attentiveness leads to more meaningful and impactful coaching sessions, as the coach can facilitate discussions and interventions that resonate on a personal level.

6. What role does authenticity play in building a coach-client relationship?

Authenticity plays a pivotal role in building a coach-client relationship by establishing a foundation of trust and mutual respect. When coaches are genuine in their interactions, openly sharing their own experiences and acknowledging their limitations, clients are more likely to feel comfortable and secure in the relationship. This transparency fosters an environment where clients can be open and honest in return, enhancing the effectiveness of the coaching process. Authenticity ensures that the relationship is based on real understanding and connection, which are critical for achieving lasting change.

7. Why must a coach maintain professionalism in their practice?

Maintaining professionalism in coaching practice is essential because it sets boundaries that protect both the coach and the client. It ensures that the relationship stays focused on the client’s growth and development, without personal biases or emotional entanglements interfering with the coaching objectives. Professionalism includes respecting confidentiality, maintaining clear communication, and upholding ethical standards, all of which contribute to a safe and respectful coaching environment. It allows the coaching process to be effective and focused, ensuring that the client’s goals and well-being remain the top priority.

8. How does trustworthiness establish a safe coaching environment?

Trustworthiness establishes a safe coaching environment by ensuring that clients feel secure in sharing their thoughts, feelings, and experiences without fear of judgment or breach of confidentiality. When a coach is seen as reliable and consistent in their actions and commitments, it builds a strong foundation of trust. This trust is crucial for creating a space where clients are willing to be vulnerable and engage in the deep, sometimes challenging work required for personal growth. A trustworthy coach fosters a sense of safety and support, making it possible for clients to explore their limits and achieve meaningful transformation.

About Simply.Coach

Simply.Coach is an enterprise-grade coaching software designed to be used by individual coaches and coaching businesses. Trusted by ICF-accredited and EMCC-credentialed coaches worldwide, Simply.Coach is on a mission to elevate the experience and process of coaching with technology-led tools and solutions.

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Ipsita Nayak

Content Marketing Manager @Simply.Coach

Ipsita Nayak is a full-time writer-editor-content strategist and a part-time NLP coach & yoga teacher. She believes conventions are overrated, has a disproportionate need for solo time over social time, and loves a good mix of sci-fi and trashy TV in her free time!

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30 qualities of a good coach (with examples)

I’ve been coaching people since 2018 and, with last year’s certification process, I’ve become even more interested in coaching and the qualities of a good coach.

If you’re looking for a coach, this article should help you have a better understanding of what to look for in your new coach.

On the other hand, if you already are a coach, this article should help you review your skills and see if there are any qualities of a good coach that you may also want to have or improve.

What is coaching?

Coaching is a form of development where the coach helps you (the coachee) to improve yourself and become more performant.

Coaching is normally a conversation or a series of conversations where the coach’s intention is to assist the coachee in their learning and development process.

Here are 10 examples of topics that can be addressed in a coaching conversation:

My team has difficulties advancing toward the business goals and I don’t understand why.
I’m changing my job from the role of a specialist to the role of a leader and I want to better understand the transition.
We have to decide between two business partners and the mentor we had is not available anymore.
The ways we do business have changed and we need to make the right decision when it comes to getting new talent.
We have the vision but we find it hard to put our ideas into practice. It feels like we got stuck in doing the things we’re good at.
We need to identify our strengths and values before we make the decision we’re about to make.
We’re not sure that our goals match the vision of the business. We need to properly identify our vision before we set our final goals.
I lost the meaning of my job and business and I have no energy left for my tasks and responsibilities.
I need to better communicate with those around me to make sure we’re on the same path toward building this business.
Whatever we do, it feels like we don’t advance at all and we’re getting tired of trying again and again. We need results and we need them as soon as possible.

By the end of the session, depending on the complexity behind the situation, the coachee should have a solution to their problem or a number of insights to help them advance toward the solution.

If you’re currently looking for a business or career coach, having examples of topics for the sessions can help you better understand what you can expect from coaching.

But coaching is more than just a simple conversation.

Coaching is a collaborative process , where the coach and coachee work together to generate insights, ideas, and solutions. The coach is there for whatever the coachee needs and assists the coachee in their journey.

To be able to do that, the coach needs to be prepared. And that’s where the qualities of a good coach come into play.

There are ways to identify a good coach.

Ideally, you’d want your coach to have all the qualities listed below but that’s hard to find and that will be somehow of a perfect coach. But we don’t live in a perfect world.

Therefore, use the list to look for the qualities that are important to you when you look for a coach.

Have a good look at the list and think of 5 to 10 qualities that describe a good coach and try to find a coach that has them.

01. A good coach is a good listener

You know you’re working with a good coach when you feel listened to. A good coach listens actively and gives you their full attention. Being a good listener is one of the qualities of a good coach that you want to prioritize.

A coach who is a good listener may say:

“I want to make sure I understand your perspective. Please tell me more about it.”
“When you talked about your job, it sounded like you were feeling nervous. Is that correct?”
“Thank you for sharing that with me. I’m here for you. What is something you need from me right now?”

02. A good coach is empathetic

When your coach can understand your perspective and feelings, and connect with them at an emotional level, your coach is a good coach.

A coach who is empathetic may say:

“I understand how difficult this must be for you.”
“It sounds like you’re going through a lot right now. How can I support you?”
“I want you to know that I’m here for you and I care about how you’re feeling.”

03. A good coach is supportive

If you feel encouraged and you see your coach supporting you in building confidence and self-belief, you’re working with a good coach.

A coach who is supportive may say:

“You’re not alone in this. We’ll work together to find solutions.”
“I want to acknowledge the effort you’re putting in. Keep up the good work!”
“I believe in you and your ability to achieve your goals.”

04. A good coach is insightful

When it comes to achieving your goals, an insightful coach will use their knowledge to provide insights based on your conversations.

A coach who is insightful may say:

“What underlying beliefs or values might be driving your actions in this situation?”
“It seems like there might be a deeper issue at play here. Let’s dig a little deeper.”
“Based on what you’ve told me, it sounds like [insert observation]. How does that resonate with you?”

05. A good coach is passionate

Working with a coach that’s passionate means working with someone who truly cares about your success.

A coach who is passionate may say:

“I’m excited to see the progress we can make together.”
“I feel honored to be part of your journey and to help you reach your full potential.”
“I’m invested in your success and will do everything I can to support you.”

06. A good coach is patient

A good coach will understand and accept your pace, no matter how slow you want to advance toward your goals.

A coach who is patient may say:

“We’ll work at your pace and focus on what’s important to you.”
“It’s okay to take small steps. Progress is progress, no matter how small.”
“Remember, this is a journey and it’s okay to stumble along the way. We’ll get there together.”

07. A good coach is non-judgmental

Do you feel like your coach accepts you for who you are without criticizing or condemning you? Then you’re working with a good coach.

A coach who is non-judgmental may say:

“I see potential in you and your abilities.”
“Your feelings and experiences are valid.”
“I’m here to listen without judgment.”

08. A good coach is resourceful

Having access to a wide range of tools and techniques to help their clients is how you know you are working with a resourceful coach.

A coach who is resourceful may say:

“There are a variety of tools and techniques we can use to address this challenge.”
“Let’s explore some different options and find what works best for you.”
“Let’s tap into your network and see if there are any connections that can help.”

Coaching for Performance

Coaching For Performance is a coaching program consisting of 17 one-hour sessions designed to help you gain a better understanding of what it means to be performant and to perform better.

This program is tailored to individuals like you who want to improve their focus, understand what holds them back, become more motivated, and who also struggle with stress and stressful relationships.

09. A good coach is honest

Even when it’s difficult, a good coach will be honest with you in order to help you grow and improve.

A coach who is honest may say:

“I’m seeing some patterns in your behavior that we need to address.”
“You may not like hearing this, but I believe it’s important for your growth.”
“I’m concerned about the impact of your actions on yourself and others.”

10. A good coach is positive

A good coach will help you focus on your strengths and potential, rather than your weaknesses, while keeping a positive attitude. This is one of the qualities of a good coach that is definitely a must!

A coach who is positive may say:

“I believe in your potential to achieve your goals.”
“Let’s focus on what you have accomplished so far.”
“Let’s celebrate the small wins and progress you’ve made.”

11. A good coach is flexible

Flexible in their coaching style and methods, a good coach makes sure they are effective in helping you achieve your goal.

A coach who is flexible may say:

“Let’s adjust our plan to fit your changing needs and circumstances.”
“I’m open to trying different approaches until we find what works best for you.”
“Let’s pivot our strategy if it’s not getting the desired results.”

12. A good coach is respectful

If you feel treated with dignity and consideration, and your opinions are valued and respected, you’re working with a good coach.

A coach who is respectful may say:

“I will be honest with you, but also mindful of your feelings.”
“I value your input and perspective, and I want to make sure you feel respected throughout our coaching relationship.”
“I will provide a safe and inclusive space for you to express yourself.”

13. A good coach is goal-oriented

When you get to work with a coach who helps you achieve specific, measurable goals, that is a good coach.

A coach who is goal-oriented may say:

“Let’s break down your long-term goals into smaller, achievable milestones.”
“What actions can we take today to move closer to your goals?”
“Let’s create a plan of action that aligns with your values and priorities.”

14. A good coach is creative

Innovative and out-of-the-box thinking is part of the identity of a good coach and it’s visible when they’re helping you achieve your desired outcome.

A coach who is creative may say:

“I’m open to experimenting with different approaches until we find what works.”
“Let’s use creative exercises and activities to spark new ideas and insights.”
“What if we approach this problem from a different perspective?”

15. A good coach is trustworthy

When you get to feel safe around your coach, both emotionally and physically, you know you work with a good coach.

A coach who is trustworthy may say:

“I will hold your information in confidence and never use it against you.”
“I will maintain professional boundaries and not cross any lines.”
“I will provide a safe and supportive environment for you to share your thoughts and feelings.”

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16. A good coach is reliable

A good coach agrees to provide you with regular check-ins and helps you stay on track to achieve your desired outcome.

A coach who is reliable may say:

“I will show up on time and be fully present for our sessions.”
“I will be available and responsive to your needs and concerns.”
“I will be consistent and reliable in my communication with you.”

17. A good coach is communicative

Using concise language to express their ideas, a good coach knows how to communicate using words you can understand.

A coach who is communicative may say:

“I’m open to receiving feedback from you to improve my coaching skills.”
“Can you explain it in a different way so that I can fully understand where you’re coming from?”
“What are your communication preferences, and how can I accommodate them?”

18. A good coach is humble

Authentically sharing personal experiences to help you feel less alone and more hopeful is what a humble coach does.

A coach who is humble may say:

“I don’t presume to know what’s best for you, but I’m here to help you discover it.”
“I’m not the expert; you are the expert on your own life.”
“I will approach our coaching relationship as a collaborative partnership.”

19. A good coach is accountable

A good coach will keep their promises, always be on time with their promises and take ownership of their actions and decisions. And because this is one of the qualities of a good coach that influence how much you trust a coach, for sure it should be prioritized.

A coach who is accountable may say:

“I will hold myself accountable for following through on our agreed-upon actions and goals.”
“I will be consistent and reliable in my communication and scheduling.”
“I will be mindful of any power dynamics in our coaching relationship and use my authority appropriately.”

20. A good coach is empowering

Whenever your coach encourages you to take ownership of your life and make your own decisions, it’s a sign you’re working with a good coach.

A coach who is empowering may say:

“You have the power and ability to make positive changes in your life.”
“I will help you discover and leverage your strengths and resources.”
“I will encourage you to take ownership of your decisions and actions.”

21. A good coach is curious

With a focus on open-ended questions, a curious coach will always try to help you gain deeper insights about your behavior.

A coach who is curious may say:

“What are your strengths and areas for improvement, and how can we leverage them?”
“What have you learned from past experiences that you can apply to your current situation?”
“What is important to you, and how can we incorporate that into your coaching plan?”

22. A good coach is sincere

Being authentic and building trust and rapport with you is what a sincere coach does, with the purpose of creating a safe space to help you explore your thoughts and feelings.

A coach who is sincere may say:

“I will celebrate your accomplishments and support you through challenges.”
“I will be authentic and vulnerable with you.”
“I will always have your best interests at heart.”

23. A good coach is intuitive

This is one of the qualities of a good coach that’s the most underappreciated. An intuitive coach can sense when something is off and needs to be addressed and knows how to gently prompt it.

A coach who is intuitive may say:

“I have a hunch that this particular issue may be connected to something else. Let’s see if we can make that connection.”
“I’m noticing some patterns in your behavior. Can we explore those and see if there’s an underlying cause?”
“I have a sense that there may be some hidden strengths or resources that we can leverage. Let’s explore that possibility.”

24. A good coach is non-directive

After taking a step back, a non-directive coach allows you to actively lead the way and make your own choices.

A coach who is non-directive may say:

“What do you think would be the best way to approach this situation?”
“How would you like to proceed with this goal?”
“What would you like to explore in our coaching session today?”

25. A good coach is systematic

A good coach uses a systemic approach to break down larger goals into manageable steps so you can healthily achieve them.

A coach who is systematic may say:

“Let’s create a timeline or action plan to keep you on track.”
“What resources or tools do you need to accomplish your goal?”
“How can we build accountability into the process to ensure progress?”

26. A good coach is collaborative

A collaborative coach works together with you to set objectives and develop a plan of action to achieve the objectives.

A coach who is collaborative may say:

“Let’s work together to identify your goals and create a plan to achieve them.”
“How can we brainstorm together to generate creative solutions?”
“What role do you see me playing in supporting you in achieving your goals?”

27. A good coach is adaptable to diverse cultures

A good coach is adaptable to diverse cultures and can work effectively with clients from different backgrounds.

A coach who is adaptable to diverse cultures may say:

“How can I adapt my coaching style to better suit your cultural expectations and communication preferences?”
“What cultural traditions or practices would you like to incorporate into our coaching sessions to make them more meaningful for you?”
“What are your expectations of a coach, and how do they align with cultural norms or expectations?”

28. A good coach is a continuous learner

Always seeking new knowledge and skills to enhance their coaching practice, a continuous learner coach is always focused on growing themselves so they can provide greater and greater value to their clients.

A coach who is a continuous learner may say:

“I’ve been reading up on some new coaching techniques and I think they may be beneficial for you. Would you be interested in trying them out?”
“Let’s collaborate to identify new resources or support that could enhance your coaching experience.”
“What challenges have you faced in achieving your goals, and how can I continue learning to better support you?”

29. A good coach is strategic

A good coach helps you develop a clear plan of action to achieve your goals, setting specific objectives and identifying steps to achieve them.

A coach who is strategic may say:

“Based on our previous sessions, I suggest we focus on X, Y, and Z to help you achieve your overall goal.”
“Let’s consider the bigger picture and how your goals fit into your overall life and career plan.”
“Let’s explore different options and approaches to achieve your goals and determine the most effective strategy for you.”

30. A good coach is self-aware

Being open to feedback and different views, a coach who is self-aware is actively seeking to improve their coaching practice.

A coach who is self-aware may say:

“I recognize when my own biases or assumptions may be impacting our coaching relationship.”
“I am open to feedback from you on how I can improve as a coach.”
“I am transparent about my coaching approach and am open to adapting it to meet your needs.”

Have you found the list valuable?

My name is David and I created this list to help you better understand the qualities of a good coach.

While being a coach myself, I also need coaching and I understand the need for a good coach. Whenever I get to work with a new coach, I analyze what is it specifically that I expect from my coach and make sure I communicate my expectations further.

If you found this list valuable:

Share it with your network
Tell your coach about it
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Are you looking for a coach?

As mentioned previously, I’ve been coaching people since 2018.

My coaching expertise can bring the most value to managers, entrepreneurs, and C-level executives.

Click the below button to explore my coaching programs and discover what others are saying about their experience with me as a coach.

With love and optimism, David

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Becoming An Effective Coach Essay

“A coach is someone who tells you what you don’t want to hear, who has you see what you don’t want to see, so you can be who you have always known you could be” (Tom Landry). In order for athletes to achieve their highest goal, they need to have an effective coach who will help them become the best athlete they can be. An effective coach will be successful while working to achieve the goals they intended. A powerful coach takes their love for the sport and puts it into their athletes. Athletes will progress immensely from what they learn from their coach.

Coaching is such an influential position in an athlete’s life, so there are certain attributes and concepts they must know and employ to be successful. Coaches need to first build a positive relationship with their athletes. For example, 12 Olympic medalists said that a key point to becoming successful is having a meaningful relationship with one’s coach. They all said they have gained feelings of closeness, trust, and respect with their coaches. As a result of having a strong relationship with their coach, they have all received an Olympic medal.

The athletecoach relationship has an important role in the athlete’s development, both as a performer and as a person (Jowett). As a performer, having a positive relationship with your coach helps build self confidence immensely while performing. Trusting the coach and what they are teaching will have a more positive effect on performers than those who don’t trust their coach. Not only does a positive coach relationship help as a performer, but also as a person. Coaches can teach many important concepts about becoming an incredible athlete, but also an incredible person.

These 12 Olympic athletes who were interviewed in this article have developed into both amazing performers and individuals. They clearly understand the importance and the abundant effects gained when having a positive athlete-coach relationship. However, athletes don’t need to be Olympic medalists to know this. It should be clear that athletes will listen to their coach better when they have a solid, stable relationship with them and can trust them. A positive athlete-coach relationship is one of the very critical aspects of athletes becoming successful.

Another essential aspect of a successful team is commitment and communication. Jeanie Molyneux researched a team in Northeast England on how and why their team works so well together. Although there were many brief components to making this team successful, the two main themes that emerged from this study were: commitment of each athlete and communication within the team. Coaches need to inform their athletes of the commitment that is going to be required to be on a team. Before athletes join a team, they need to realize there are many things they need to be willing to sacrifice.

Athletes who fully commit themselves are willing to give up certain things that may seem important at the time, but aren’t as important as what they are trying to accomplish in the long term. Just as it is for athletes, the coach needs to be entirely committed to their team as well. Coaches who aren’t fully committed will not produce a successful team and will eventually just give up coaching. For example, approximately 35 percent of swim coaches discontinue their job because they say coaching is to consuming and demanding. Before coaches commit to their job, they need to consider everything necessary for coaching and fully commit themselves.

Sport organizations recognize that continuity of coaches is crucial to sustaining a successful team (Raedeke). Bringing forth a successful team requires both the athletes and the coaches to be fully committed. On the other side of commitment, communication will be a benefactor of producing a winning team as well. Today, one of the biggest challenges teams have is effective communication . Communication within functional teams must be examined, discussed, and taught in order for teams to succeed (Smart). Communication throughout the team is mandatory .

Not only do athletes need to be able to communicate with their teammates, but they need to be able to communicate with their coach as well. As a result, the team will progress to greater success. The coach needs to demonstrate communication and commitment, because these are both critical in a winning team. Along with recognizing communication and commitment, the coach needs to recognize the psychological effects along with the physical effects. The physical aspect of coaching is fairly obvious. A coach demonstrates to their athlete what they physically want to happen, and the athlete will try to fulfill it.

However, psychologically speaking, what coaches say to their athletes has an impact on them also. A few teams were examined, and it was found that athletes who played for coaches who recognized the psychological impact they have, reported lower levels of anxiety and higher levels of self-esteem. A player’s motivation will increase dramatically by how their coach is making them feel. Athletes are less likely to drop out of sports when they have a trained coach who understands they have a psychological effect on their athletes (Gearity).

Whatever is said to someone, whether valuable or harmful, will be remembered longer than something that is learned physically. Putting players down, telling them they aren’t good enough, or embarrassing them in front of their teammates will influence players to not perform well. Athletes are not going to want to continue learning from their coach if it is not a rewarding and positive experience . Successful coaches will realize that what they say will have a big effect on how they perform. A coach understanding psychological effects is another step to a successful team.

Along with understanding psychological effects, a coach needs to teach the team to work together. Teamwork is crucial for a team to succeed, and that should be directed by the coach. Teamwork is the effective and efficient combined effort of a group. Diane Coutu interviewed J. Richard Hackman about his viewpoint on team unity. Spending a career exploring the wisdom of teams, Hackman’s research shows that, most of the time, team members don’t agree on what they are suppose to be doing. He thinks the most essential thing teams lack is teamwork.

Hackman said that getting agreement in the team is the leader’s job and he or she must be willing to take great personal and professional risks to set a team’s direction (Coutu). Producing teamwork can be challenging. Encouraging a big group of people to get along and to work together is not always going to be simple. The coach needs to be willing to teach whatever is necessary for their team to grasp the idea of teamwork. Just like Hackman said, it is the coach’s responsibility to teach teammates how to get along and to work successfully together. Generating this is going to take effort from both the coach and the athletes.

The teams who were researched struggled to get along with each other, and consequently, that greatly affected their overall performance in a negative way . A team is never going to understand how to win if they don’t learn how to work together first. Being selfish and trying to win by oneself is self destructive . Sports are, most of the time, a group effort and can not be played by only one person. Efficacious teams have grasped the idea of teamwork, and that’s something that can be recognized in their overall performance. Exceptional teamwork will lead any team to success, and that should be directed by the coach.

Additionally to the coach demonstrating teamwork, demonstrating hands-on coaching works best and will affect the team’s overall performance. Hands-on means involving or offering an active participation. It is easier to learn what a coach is trying to portray when they actively show it to you and not just expect you to know what they are talking about. When coaches are actively involved while teaching their athletes what they need to know, it helps more than most would suspect. As an example, a few teams were researched, and the ones who were more successful than others were those with coaches who used hands-on coaching.

Findings show how leaders design their teams and the quality of their hands-on coaching influences team self-management, the quality of member relationships, and member satisfaction of being on the team (Wageman). The first thing hands-on coaching improves is self-management. Working with a team who will take responsibility of one’s own behavior will be easier than working with a team who won’t take personal blame for one’s actions. The second thing hands-on coaching improves is the quality of member relationships.

A team with positive relationships will be very beneficial when working to achieve success. Lastly, using hands-on coaching helps greatly with team members being satisfied with the team they are on. Working with athletes who are content with the team they are on will be more enjoyable than working with those who aren’t. Working with athletes who don’t enjoy being on the team could be aggravating. Coaching hands-on doesn’t really seem like it would be that big of a deal, but seen from this example, hands-on coaching works in many ways and will eventually lead the team to be successful.

Another attribute for successful coaching is for the coach to treat their athletes with the same respect and hold them all to equivalent standards. Gregg Popovich , head coach of the San Antonio Spurs, is known to be very successful because he holds all of his players accountable. Popovich once benched star player, Steve Kerr, at a game because his body language was terrible. He said he would have done the same for any of his other players. Popovich coaches with complete fairness to his athletes and teaches great discipline (Fayol).

Steve Kerr made some careless choices at one game, so, as a result, Popovich held him accountable for his actions, and sat him for the rest of the game. Being responsible for one’s own mistakes is something that needs to be learned to achieve success. It doesn’t matter if the athlete is the most outstanding player or the worst one, they need to be held to the same discipline. Discipline is the practice of training people to obey rules, and when one breaks the rules, being accountable for oneself. The coach treating everyone on the team equally will only benefit the team to become superior.

No athlete is going to want to play for a coach who favors the best athletes. Athletes always have room to learn and improve their techniques. Equality throughout the team is valuable for athletes to actually appreciate their coach and the sport. The coach teaching discipline is another beneficial step to leading the team to success. Just like Tom Landry says, a coach can help athletes become the person they have always wanted to become. For athletes to eventually become successful it will take some time and effort, but coaches have a big role in helping athletes achieve their highest goal.

There are certain attributes and concepts athletes need to learn from their coaches to be successful. These attributes and concepts for coaches are having a positive athlete-coach relationship, demonstrating commitment and communication, understanding the psychological effects of coaching, producing a team who can work together, using hands-on coaching, and teaching discipline. These six attributes and concepts will greatly determine how successful a coach will be when helping their athletes achieve the highest goal they can.

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What Great Coaching Looks Like

Richard Boyatzis, professor at Case Western Reserve University, says that every professional can benefit from having a coach — and serving as one for someone else. He says...

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Richard Boyatzis, professor at Case Western Reserve University, says that every professional can benefit from having a coach — and serving as one for someone else. He says that a coaching relationship moves beyond mentoring or sponsoring in that it focuses on long-term values and aspirations. The best coaches encourage a positive mindset and ask probing questions to help people make the best choices, not only in their careers but also in their personal lives. Boyatzis is coauthor of the HBR article “ Coaching for Change .”

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ALISON BEARD: Welcome to the HBR IdeaCast from Harvard Business Review. I’m Alison Beard.

Throughout our careers we’ll all need to contemplate big decisions and changes. Maybe it’s picking between two job offers, or considering an international move, or feeling so stagnant in your career that you want to quit. When we’re in these situations we naturally turn to others for advice.

I typically go to a few people: my husband, Scott, my fellow journalist friend Rebecca, and my HBR colleague and work brother, Dan. They’ve steered me pretty straight so far and when I worked on an article with our guest today, I began to understand why. They recognize when I’m struggling or conflicted about something. They understand my core values and what I really want out of my career and personal life. They know my strengths and weaknesses. They ask good questions. They make good suggestions and they are always there.

Richard Boyatzis, a professor at Case Western Reserve University would call them “compassionate coaches.” He’s spent decades studying what really motivates people to make smart, personal and professional decisions that help them change and grow. He’s learned that we’re all much more successful in these efforts if we get help from an effective coach. He says that we should all be looking for that kind of support. But even more importantly, we should all learn how to give it.

Richard is also the co-author of the book, Helping People Change: Coaching with Compassion for Lifelong Learning and Growth. Richard, thank you so much for being here.

RICHARD BOYATZIS: Thank you Alison.

ALISON BEARD: So, we all need a coach. I seem to have found some good ones in my life. But for listeners who don’t feel like they’re getting the right help from people around them, where do they turn?

RICHARD BOYATZIS: Let me start with the other side of it because in all of our roles, as a parent, or as a manager, as a friend, part of our ethos is to reach out and help someone. The challenge is that most of the time when we do it, we’re trying to fix someone.

What we end up doing is making people feel that we’re imposing on them and it’s an approach which we have now documented both behaviorally and neurologically in terms of fMRI studies, as what we call it, coaching for compliance. You’re really trying to get the other person to do what you want them to do. And as a result of that, most of the time, people don’t learn much, they don’t change, or whatever they do is not sustainable.

What you want to do is turn to someone who could help you with this alternate approach. As you mentioned, we call it coaching with compassion. But it really has to do with helping of any form. They’re caring about you. And then that extends to not just saying, they’re going to tell you how better to dress, or how to accessorize, or how to write. They’re going to talk about what’s important to you and to tie into a person’s dreams and their core values, ends up being much more powerful in helping them open up to new ideas and people.

ALISON BEARD: I’d love to break it down a little bit. We’re talking about change. Is there a difference when you’re trying to do something that’s just completely within you? You know, breaking a bad habit, or just something else that’s in your control versus making a change that requires input from other people, whether it’s getting a promotion, or figuring out how to make a relationship better?

RICHARD BOYATZIS: Actually there isn’t, because in both cases you have to confront a set of obstacles that are keeping you stuck. And what we’ve discovered – I mean back in the 70s, when I was doing therapy with alcoholics and drug addicts, one of the things that was very clear is if people didn’t want to stay sober for a bigger reason than just maintaining sobriety, it didn’t last very long. It had kind of the durability or sustainability of New Year’s Eve resolutions.

But what we now discover is that if the context is larger – what you want out of life, what you want in your sense of where work fits into that – that you really need to start at that level. When it involves other people, then you have to think through how do you go about the process of engaging others in some effort to work on it? And the question is who helps you think those through?

ALISON BEARD: Yeah. So, in a career context we often talk about mentors helping you make those decisions. What’s the difference between a coach and a mentor?

RICHARD BOYATZIS: A lot of people have made a big difference in the academic literature about coaching and mentoring. And right now, I mean Kathy Kram is the doyenne of mentoring research and she and Belle Rose Ragins did a fantastic handbook on it a number of years ago. And part of what they talked about was that very often people will characterize mentoring that social and emotional and relational versus instrumental.

And I think an awful lot of coaching associations make a big deal out of well, if you’re giving people tips, or opening doors, that’s mentoring. If you’re working with them about their issues, that’s coaching. But if it’s deep, if it’s psychological then that’s counseling and that’s different too.

And our research is showing that a lot of those differences aren’t differences. That the efficacy of what we’re doing when we’re trying to help somebody depends on how we approach it. We’d probably be better in all of those roles if what we did was spend some time trying to figure out what do people really want to be doing.

I mean I remember in the 90s when we were doing a lot of work in organizations on vision, and a lot of top executives would say to me, “well I don’t like this idea of asking people what their dream is. Suppose their dream isn’t to work here?” And my response was, “well then they don’t now!”

Whether it’s mentoring, or coaching, I would say yes, every manager, every leader is responsible for knowing the dreams and what motivates the people that report to them and their peers.

ALISON BEARD: You talk in the book about coachable moments and the need for leaders to recognize when the people on their teams, even their colleagues are in one of these moments. How do you do that?

RICHARD BOYATZIS: Well, it’s kind of like the challenge as a parent with teenagers. How do you decide when this is a life learning experience or not? Part of it has to do with whether or not you think there’s something important going on that the person can take a slightly different perspective on. Or, feel differently about.

But the other part of it is you have to decide when the person is ready. I mean one of the things that I think is a problem with a lot of attempts to help or teach is that we offer it to people in the wrong doses. That people very often want small doses of caring and when they ask for it, advice. And knowing when and what dose is appropriate ends up being kind of pretty sophisticated talent that some of us develop over time naturally and others need to work on it a little bit.

I mean people start to wonder like does that mean I have to be somebody’s social worker? No. We’re not asking that you care about every person equally the same way, because that would be exhausting. We’re saying, use it judiciously.

ALISON BEARD: Right. So getting the dose right is one way you can be a great coach. Give me a few other examples of what the best coaches do.

RICHARD BOYATZIS: One of them is when a person starts to say, here’s the presenting problem. This is what I’m worried about. While you want to come back to that, because that’s the thing that you need to address, a lot of people think coaching is I should only focus on that. And that I think is as foolish as my internist letting me diagnose myself on the internet and tell him what medicine he should give me.

So, I think a part of any, in any of the forms of helping where we’re trying to use this, what we call coaching with compassion, it’s to stop the person and say, as they share the initial presenting issue and say OK, let me get a context for this.

Now part of the context is if you will, a bigger picture. But if you say to the person, what’s the bigger picture, they’re going to be stuck in the negative feeling very often, or thoughts, so they will give you more about how that other person is a real nasty piece of work instead of, what might be the real underlying issue is they don’t want that job. Or, the nature of the organization got acquired and the culture of the new place isn’t like the old one.

So, helping somebody sort out what we call their personal vision, their dream, what’s their purpose in life? That’s useful. Sometimes we get to that through talking about dreams. So, it’s not just what would you love your life to be like in 15 years. What would you do if you won $80 million after tax? How would it effect your life?

ALISON BEARD: That’s fun to think about.

RICHARD BOYATZIS: Yeah, that’s exactly the point is let a person come up with a larger context. So, there’re a number of these techniques you can use. I mean one of the very effective ones is to ask a person who’s helped you the most become who you are? One of the reasons that works is it pulls on gratitude. And gratitude is one of these emotions that we now know helps activate a part of the body’s hormonal system and neurological networks that make us open to new ideas.

ALISON BEARD: How do you start moving from those more positive conversations to actually solving the problem, taking action, making change?

RICHARD BOYATZIS: That’s very important. My experience is that so many people are so well versed in planning that for most people, I would venture to guess for 80 percent of the people, if you have them clarify the what and the why, they’ll lay out the steps. Because the individual often knows parts of their setting that they’re not sharing with you, or you may not know. So, sensitivity to the holistic aspect of it is a little allusive.

Now, once you do that, I mean I remember in one of my executive MBA students, very successful VP of IT at a company, he had an IT consulting company on the side. And he wrote his personal vision essay all about promise keepers. He was African-American and he was very committed to the movement which is for predominately African-American males to keep their promise to their families and their children. And he didn’t say anything about his work.

And I sat there with him in arranged coaching session we had as a part of the course I was teaching, Darryl Gresham is his name with his permission, and we talk about him in the book. And I said Darryl, what would you really want to be doing? And he said, you know, I don’t know. I said look. Did you not write about work because you have a great trust fund? And he said, he laughed and he said no.

I said, well if you had your druthers, what would you do? And he said, well, drive a truck across country. It was 45 minutes into the conversation where we weren’t making much progress, and I said to him, I said Darryl, you said to me he liked single malt scotches. I said OK. It’s Friday night. You get home from work, you pour yourself one of your favorite single malts and you sit down and you’ve got a smile on your face. And you’re saying yes, this was a great week. What did you just do in that week?

And he went, well I just helped some young people, mostly teenagers realize that computers were their way out of the social challenges they have, not their enemy. And it’s not uncool or anything like that. I said, say more. He leans forward in his seat, now he’s babbling ideas like it’s a fire hose in terms of the water coming out.

So, he lays this whole thing out. And I said, Daryl, how come that’s not a part of what you’re doing? He said, I know it’s embarrassing, but I like all of my accoutrements, like my car and I’m helping my ex-wife and I’m helping my daughter and he said I need money for all those things.

I said, Darryl, just because you want to help people do that doesn’t mean you have to do it. Because he said, I can’t become a secondary school teacher. I said it doesn’t mean you have to do it full-time. So, all I had to do was get him to talk about it and then appreciate the fact that he didn’t have to do it full-time and he went rolling with it.

ALISON BEARD: So, you have studied coaching for most of your career. I also suspect that you’re someone who maybe was intuitively good at it to start with. How do people who don’t do it instinctively get better at it?

RICHARD BOYATZIS: Eat more fiber. No, but it goes back to the very message we’re saying is, you have to think about whether or not it’s important. Do you see the people that you’re working with as ones that you would like to help with learning and change? When people know that you care about them, they care back. When you’re on top of things and you’re able to understand, what’s the shift you’re going to be better at picking up tells, if you will, or unconscious queues that a person’s troubled by something. A lot of times we’re talking about moments that might be all of 10 minutes, or 15 minutes.

ALISON BEARD: So, in your experience, if someone is a natural, let’s fix the problem type, they can be taught to coach with compassion instead.

RICHARD BOYATZIS: Yes. One of my former executive MBA students was a marketing executive at a multinational oil company. And I remember when we got his 360 results back, his subordinates said he wasn’t really high on developing them, which seemed odd. His name is Juan Trebino. I said to Juan, I said, you know, I don’t see you that way. Everybody talks to you all the time and people like you. He said, I think I know what’s going on here. You know me as, I’m in a marketing function. He said, but I’ve spent most of my life as an engineer.

He said when people come to me at work with problems, I don’t see the person, I see the problem. He said actually, I think people are problem bearing platforms. Which is such an engineering way to look at it.

So, here we have the issue of can we help people with a very technical, and we know what drives that in terms of which networks in the brain. And unfortunately, the networks that drive that analytic mindset or financial mindset close or suppress the networks that allow you to be open to new ideas or people.

So, part of it is teaching folks in these fields, or with these dispositions how to interrupt it. We’re not saying you have to find your version of God and have a transformational experience. What we’re saying is you have to learn to mix it up a little bit. And it turns out that some of the activities that can help you interrupt that and shift these different neuro networks are things like talking to people. But talking not in an instrumental sense of well, what are we going to do next, but how’s it going? Or, allowing for humor. Doing something that gives people a break to chat.

And what we find is that if you’re working with folks that are very technical, very analytic, and they want to be an effective leader, of one sort or another, it doesn’t take much for them to realize that they need to have this other set of skills, or capabilities. And interestingly enough, I mean I have this experience all the time, especially with very financially oriented CEO’s, but also I had it with a nephew the other day in the car who’s an IT executive, talking about this stuff I realized that I can give him all the statistics in the world, and it doesn’t matter. So, I stopped and I said, have you ever had somebody as a boss who really brought out the best in you? And this is my nephew. And he said yes. I said, tell me about him. How did he act? What did he say or do? He described him. I said, that’s what I’m talking about.

When I’ve done it with CEOs I’ve said do you have a president of one of your divisions that you would love to clone, they’re so good? And they said yes. I said, no names, just think about the person. I said now, do you have some that you wish would just disappear because you don’t want to do all this stuff to fire them, but they really are a pain, or not doing well? And they said yes. I said, tell me about the difference. As they talked about the emotional difference in their experience, they proved the case.

ALISON BEARD: Right. How can we begin to institutionalize some of this in organizations?

RICHARD BOYATZIS: That’s always more complicated. There are, part of it ends up being willingness to shift the culture, to not be so narrowly focused on just results. I’m not saying results aren’t important. I mean I ran two companies for 11 years. I get it. You want results. You want performance.

But part of it is appreciating the fact that by always focusing on it, you don’t help people get there. So, sometimes to do the innovative thing that makes the breakthrough that gives you the big new product or service requires something else. That something else is what we often refer to as a “culture of development”. Where we don’t see our main purpose in the culture of getting the most out of people. We see it as investing in people and getting the most out of people. And when we balance this aspect of it, we’re more willing to start to think about what we variously called in the book, a culture of coaching, or a culture of caring.

And when you think about development as well as performance, one of the first things you appreciate is the fact that for God’s sakes, don’t drive them at the same time. I mean there are a lot of companies now that are wrestling with dumping big performance reviews. I think they’re making a mistake. Their confusion is most of the time when people do performance reviews, they do the review of how you did on your goals and objectives and the outcomes and then let’s talk about how you can change.

That’s the part that doesn’t work. Because you can’t do those two things together. Nobody goes through a performance review and doesn’t feel defensive. Everyone does. So, you don’t want the person in that state of mind, frame of mind or the development conversation. But both are important. So, I would say just do them at separate times.

ALISON BEARD: And doesn’t there also have to be across the organization, in every manager, A, a willingness to spend the time doing this when there’s so many other things to do. And B, an openness to your employee not moving in the direction you expect them, or need them to?

RICHARD BOYATZIS: I mean of those of us who study organizational change, I mean we used to say rule of thumb was 33 percent of the managers. My guess is it has to do with pockets in an organization. That it’s seldom, you can get the whole organization to change. But if you can get one unit, whether it’s a plant, or a business unit, or a division to start to show a lot of this, other units will start to be attracted to it.

That’s how I think we’ll get sustainable change in organizations. And we’ve seen it. We’ve seen it in some companies that have very, very engaging cultures. I mean what John Chambers was able to orchestrate at Cisco Systems was amazing. I mean they did, what was I told? 12 to 18 acquisitions a year. And 75 percent, I was told by a senior VP, 75 percent of the key executives stayed beyond the payout period.

ALISON BEARD: That’s impressive.

RICHARD BOYATZIS: Then you contrast it to another high tech company of that era, this is a number of years ago before each of these people retired, but Larry Ellison at Oracle, where they made a lot of acquisitions and almost all the key people left before they even signed the documents.

ALISON BEARD: Is there a cultural component to this? Is coaching this way more difficult in some societies than others?

RICHARD BOYATZIS: Yes. Interestingly enough, it’s also easier to do in many societies than others. One of the dilemmas I noticed because up until a couple years ago, I was either in Europe or Asia every month, is that when you try to hold training programs, or classes in many countries of the world that have what in Hofstede’s terms have a high power distance. In other words, if a country has a very distinct notion of hierarchy that people aren’t supposed to say something in front of someone with higher or lower status.

So, you realize Japan, Korea, Saudi Arabia and to a less extent, but still pretty severe, Italy, Greece, Spain, Portugal that all of a sudden when you have a high powered distance and a high sensitivity, people don’t want to talk openly in training programs. I remember in the 90s, having these training programs with executives at several corporations in northern Italia, and they wouldn’t say anything in sessions. We’d go out for a coffee break and I couldn’t stop them talking. Or, we’d have lunch or dinner. That’s where they were having their discussions.

In those, all those cultures of the world, coaching allows people to get development, but in the privacy of a one-on-one. So, I actually think for many countries of the world, many cultures in the world I should say, coaching holds more promise than training programs, or formal educational programs, to help people develop as better leaders.

ALISON BEARD: And coaching can go all ways. You mentioned peer-to-peer. We talked about manager to employee. But employees can also coach their managers?

RICHARD BOYATZIS: Upward – yes and peers. Doing these kinds of conversations upward is a little more awkward in the sense that some people are just not open to it. But if they are, they can be very fruitful. I mean one of my best coaches is a former student of mine which in many ways I not only have learned, but I also have learned that even when I’m not in the mood, if she offers something for me to consider that its well worth thinking about. But more often than not, I’ll actually turn to her and say, hey, I’m trying to work on this. What do you think? So, it’s, I think it’s possible. It’s a little more difficult given if the relationships aren’t open.

ALISON BEARD: Well, I feel like I’ve gotten a little bit better at coaching other people after working with you on this article. So, hopefully that will happen for our listeners too. Thank you so much for coming in.

RICHARD BOYATZIS: Thank you for the opportunity.

ALISON BEARD: That’s Richard Boyatzis, professor at Case Western Reserve University. He’s also the coauthor of the book, Helping People Change and the HBR article, “Coaching for Change”. You can find it in the September/October 2019 issue, or at HBR.org.

This episode was produced by Mary Dooe. We get technical help from Rob Eckhardt. Adam Buchholz is our audio product manager. Thanks for listening to the HBR IdeaCast . I’m Alison Beard.

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What does a coach do, benefits of a great coaching experience, what’s the difference between mentoring and coaching, questions to ask when hiring a coach, what to look for: 6 characteristics of a great coach, coaching in the workplace, a great coach takes you the extra mile.

A long-term relationship isn’t working and you aren’t sure what to do, or you’re entering the job market and realizing you’d rather change fields. You might have health and mental fitness goals but aren’t sure how to fit them into your life.

You can’t overcome all of life’s hurdles on your own. Sometimes, you might need help from a professional who can bring clarity and a new perspective to your thinking. They’ll transform an uphill challenge into an achievable goal-oriented process.

Working with an effective coach can give you the support you need to solve problems and thrive. Life and career coaches help you feel grounded and create pathways for self-improvement, whether you’re in the midst of a crisis or just want a helping hand.

There are thousands of professional coaches out there, and making a choice on who to work with can feel overwhelming, even if you’ve used a coach before. Learning what makes a great coach, how to ask the right questions, and how to choose between different coaching specializations will help you find the right match for you.

A coach is a trained professional who works collaboratively with clients to guide them through personal and professional transitions or issues. Depending on your needs, you may meet with your coach weekly, biweekly, or monthly.

Coaching is flexible, and there are several options to be coached in person or virtually, whether over the phone, video conferencing, or text chat. There are several types of coaching out there for different personal and professional challenges, including (but not limited to):

Personal development coaches

Life coaches

Business coaches

Financial coaches

Mindfulness coaches

Accountability coaches

Relationship coaches

Career coaches

Health coaches

A coach will meet with you regularly and help you work through issues and make action plans to achieve your goals , whether that’s in life, at work, or in any other area. You may want to hire a coach with specific goals in mind, like earning a promotion or improving executive communication skills .

Other situations might require more general guidance, like if you’re broadly unhappy at work but can’t pinpoint why. A coach can help you find your bearings and articulate specific problems and objectives.

Coaching is a non-directive experience, which means a coach will ask you questions and build strategies to help you achieve your goals independently. Think of coaching as accepting a guiding hand. Instead of telling you what to do, they help you reach a conclusion or build a plan on your own.

Woman-writing-something-on-whiteboard-what-makes-a-great-coach

Successful coaching experiences teach you to take a step back and look at your decisions and problems more clearly. A coach’s support gives you space for honest self-reflection that empowers personal growth and learning.

According to research by BetterUp, 55% of employees are languishing , meaning they aren’t doing well but they aren’t suffering, either. If you’re languishing, it can be hard to identify what exactly you need to change, or that things can get better at all. You’re somewhere between thriving and burning out.

Coaching is a well-being improvement tool that can help you close that gap. Instead of languishing, you’ll identify the steps you need to take to thrive. You can learn better habits (like proper exercise and sleep), create your definitions of success, and build skills like time management.

After three months of individual coaching, many people see a 38% decrease in languishing . Likewise, a positive coaching experience has long-lasting benefits .

Coaches help you plant the seeds for core skills like self-efficacy, resilience, and confidence that contribute to greater mental health long after the coaching relationship ends.

Mentoring usually occurs between two professionals in the same field or organization. Mentors draw from their personal know-how and life experience to give general career advice, an insider’s perspective, and access to their network.

Ultimately, the mentee must decide what to do with that information and contacts and build their own strategies to advance their career. Only 41% of mentor relationships define a specific set of goals , meaning in a mentorship, you need to take your own steps to set objectives and improve yourself.

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Mentorships can be part of a short-term training program at your organization, or they can be a long-term or lifelong relationship. However, the higher up the mentor, the more difficult it could be to get a piece of their time when you face a challenge.

A key difference between mentoring and coaching is that a coach focuses on implementation. Their job is to help set goals and identify the right solutions to alter behavior or develop a skill.

They place attention on overall self-improvement techniques throughout the whole process, and since they meet with you on a schedule, they’ll always have time to talk.

Working with a coach is a vulnerable experience. It requires someone who makes you feel at ease and comfortable sharing difficult parts of yourself. Every coach has their own background and coaching style, and it’s normal for one to be a better coach for you than others.

During your first one-on-one meeting with a new coach, prepare some questions ahead of time to understand more about them and their coaching process. Here are a few examples:

What are your specialties as a coach?

How did you become a coach?

What makes your approach unique?

How do we create goals and strategies together?

How do you measure results for your clients?

How has your coaching style changed over time?

How do you conduct coaching sessions? How often?

Are you accessible between our sessions?

If you don’t feel like the coach is a good fit, let them know at the end of the session and continue looking for someone who meets your needs. A coach is a professional, and they won’t take it personally if they aren’t the right person for you.

Woman-on-the-phone-looking-at-laptop-what-makes-a-great-coach

It requires a mastery of several soft skills to be a coach. A successful coach works hard to empathize with you and create a safe, constructive space where you can share your problems.

To make sure you’re getting the most out of your coaching relationship, pay attention to these six characteristics:

Openness: How open to the coaching experience are they? Do they ask you open-ended questions so you can draw your own conclusions, or do they direct you to act in a certain direction? The best coaches are good listeners and patient guides so you reach conclusions on your own.

Enthusiasm: A good coach will celebrate even the smallest improvements and victories. They read your strengths and weaknesses and create frameworks that encourage, excite, and motivate you.

Empathy: An important part of your partnership is nurturing a safe space to bring your authentic self to every session. A good coach gets to know you beyond your immediate goals. They understand and respect your triggers and motivators to create a support system that lets you break out of your comfort zone.

Self-awareness: In a coaching relationship, the spotlight should always be on you. A cornerstone of good coaching is clear boundaries that keep you focused on your own journey. Coaches who constantly discuss their own experiences can distract you from your journey or create biases in your decision-making.

Commitment: High-performance coaches work with you even when you feel like giving up. They motivate you and lend support through the good, bad, and ugly parts of the problem-solving process .

Trust: Seeking change puts you in a vulnerable headspace, regardless of the situation you’re in. A coach should establish a space that’s judgment-free where you can trust that what you say is confidential.

Although coaching can benefit you in any area of your life, it's especially helpful in professional contexts . American workers want to use their strengths in the workplace , and engagement increases when managers use employees' strengths . But not everyone knows their best assets or how to use them. A coach helps people find their strengths and use them to participate better and thrive at work.

Remember that a coach doesn't have to be a formal, external career coach. A manager or supervisor can act as a coach in their management style . This is known as a learning-forward leadership style — encouraging employees’ professional development while supporting the team.

Man-being-coached-at-work-what-makes-a-great-coach

Think of the coach of a sports team. They work with individual athletes to push them to their full potential without losing sight that the player is part of a larger team. A sports coach and an athlete have a friendly and personal relationship that revolves around a common goal: to improve their performance. A good manager-employee relationship does the same thing.

Keep in mind that even a great manager — whether you have one or you are one — doesn’t replace coaching. If you’re seeking guidance in the workplace, a manager can help, but they also have their own job to do. An external coach has more experience with coaching skills and won’t have unconscious biases about your workplace or coworkers.

If you want to hire a coach for you or your business, it's important to understand what makes a great coach. A good coach does more than deliver encouraging pep talks to their clients. They understand where you are on your journey and help you find the best way to reach your goals.

Finding a professional coach that makes you feel safe and comfortable is key, and building that supportive relationship will carry over into your long-term wellness.

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Madeline Miles

Madeline is a writer, communicator, and storyteller who is passionate about using words to help drive positive change. She holds a bachelor's in English Creative Writing and Communication Studies and lives in Denver, Colorado. In her spare time, she's usually somewhere outside (preferably in the mountains) — and enjoys poetry and fiction.

How transformational coaching can change your life

What high-performance coaching is and how to find a coach, 7 types of employee coaching (and why you can’t afford to miss out), why the secret to great coaching lies in motivation, parent coaching: what it is and how it can help your family, coaching vs. therapy: do you need a coach, a therapist, or both, what life coaching is (and what it isn’t), how to coach your team to success: 5 key tips for managers, confused about coaching here's the rundown on different types at work and beyond, what’s a sleep coach why you need one, what’s a teacher career coach, and do you need one, 20 ways to make sure you go to work happy, how to become a life coach and start a promising career, how a tech career coach can help you level up, communication coach: what they are and how to find one, how to find a coach to help you reach your goals, what is career coaching 4 signs you need a career coach, stay connected with betterup, get our newsletter, event invites, plus product insights and research..

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What makes a great coach?

Get coaching. Get results. Results coaching

Many Olympic athletes, high-powered executives, business leaders, and successful entrepreneurs have one thing in common: they rely on coaches to help them achieve their goals and succeed.

While there are many factors and variables that go into finding the right coach for you , the qualities of a great coach are the same. As you begin your search for a great coach, remember the following qualities.

What defines a great coach?

A great coach is defined by their ability to lead and inspire others to reach beyond their current situation, and achieve something extraordinary. Great coaches are more than just their use of words or tools – they have a unique ability to drive action, optimize resources and elevate individuals to new heights of achievement.

As Tony Robbins oftensays, the right life coach can help you reach and even exceed your biggest dreams and goals . The ability to lead, inspire, teach and elevate others is a special gift. Great coaches have polished this gift and understand how to become trusted partners who inspire others to take big actions toward even bigger goals.

Qualities of a Great Coach

Great coaches have different life experiences and backgrounds, but they all share a similar set of positive traits. The most important qualities of a great coach include:

Realistic: Sees their clients and the situation as they are.
Maintains a Clear Vision: Helps clients develop clear and compelling goals.
Communication: Fosters trust and progress toward goals through clear, honest, and understanding communication.
Accountable and Strategic: Ensures clients have a clear strategy to follow for success and holds them accountable to the actions needed to achieve those goals.

These qualities together form the cornerstone of what it means to be not just good, but a great coach, capable of transforming both individual and collective performance.

How to be a Great Coach

Learning how to be a great coach involves developing the qualities listed above into techniques to inspire others and challenge them to want more. Recognizing the importance of certain skills, such as strong communication, attentive listening, honesty and accountability, goes a long way to understanding what makes a great coach.

Great coaches understand that improvement won’t happen overnight, and that it takes hard work, dedication and support. For progress to occur, life coaches must create an environment that gives their clients space to explore and uncover their true potential.

Views Reality As It Is

Great coaches see things as they are, not worse and not better. They have a firm grasp on reality and are honest about where they stand. Unlike most people, however, they do not dwell on problems; they tackle them head-on. They have the proper skills and knowledge to assess the situation and find the best path forward. Fear and doubt do not play a role in their mission, even though they must take necessary risks to help others break through to the next level.

Maintains a Clear Vision: Co-creates Your Compelling Future

To accomplish anything, great coaches also help you craft a future vision – a future where you live life on your terms, a future that YOU find compelling. They must be able to look at clients not just as they are, but who they can become .

Like great leaders, a great coach inspires you to see this vision as not just possible but also attainable. They can help you see your strengths from a new perspective, showing you that you have everything it takes to get the job done. It goes beyond directing activity and when your future is compelling, it’s easier to set goals and achieve them because you feel excited to make it happen.

Rapport and Effective Communication Skills

Great coaches understand that communication is key to building a foundation of trust and respect between themselves and their clients. Effective coaching understands that people communicate in various ways, not just verbally. They listen to their client’s non-verbal communication, paying attention to their facial expressions and body language.

Clear, open and honest communication will help the coach and the client get the most out of their coaching relationship. When everyone is on the same page, it encourages growth and commitment.

Another aspect of effective communication is that a great coach knows how to embrace the power of deep listening. Coaches appreciate the fact that their relationships cannot exist by talking at their clients – they need to talk with their clients, which starts with attentive listening. When the client speaks, a great coach will give them their complete attention.

These qualities of a great coach create an environment where the client feels empowered to be vulnerable and open to exploration. A client will only see success or make change when they feel safe to do so. This is why it is so important for coaches to spend time building rapport between them and their clients. Breaking down walls and barriers is an important step on the path toward greatness. Clients can only achieve their dreams when they feel that someone sees them, hears them, and empowers them to do the work.

Accountability and Strategic Thinking

Great coaches also understand strategy. They realize that transforming a vision into reality requires incremental changes that amount to radical results. It’s not always about the resources available. It’s about knowing how to maximize resources – someone’s will, energy, creativity, courage, faith and determination – to achieve goals.

A coach’s work isn’t done when they deliver the strategy. Great coaches know that the odds of success are greater when they hold their clients accountable. It doesn’t matter how incredible the strategy is if you’re not held accountable for seeing it through. A great coach will continually check in with their clients to ensure they’re making progress. Once the client understands their coach is in their corner and has their back, they’re more likely to follow through on the strategy and reach their goal.

Discovering the Power of a Great Coach

Great coaches come from all walks of life. They’ve all had different experiences and approach situations uniquely. However, they all have these same six qualities. That’s what makes a great coach.

Great coaches embrace communication, knowledge and observance. They know that to inspire and influence, they must embrace their leadership skills and become clear and efficient problem solvers.

Connecting with a great coach who really inspires you can lead to incredible transformations in both personal and professional life.

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Where are you in life? Do you want to reach a new level of success, but you’re not sure how to proceed? Have you been wondering how to find a life coach? Maybe you know you need a major change, but feel paralyzed by indecision. No matter your goals, working 1-on-1 with a professional coach can help. With a coach by your side, you’ll stay focused and accountable to the goals you set. The best life coaches can teach you proven strategies and tools that turn your dreams into reality.

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You can’t always control the circumstances of your life, but you can choose to have an extraordinary life. There’s no shortage of advice on happiness and how to live a fulfilling life. But most of it lies at one of two extremes. You either focus on achieving external goals – like more money, vibrant health, and better relationships – or […]

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Emotions are the lifeblood of the human experience. They’re the driving forces that shape our decisions, actions, and reactions. Whether it’s the passionate love that leads to marriage or the rage that can incite war, emotions are the ultimate power – the core of what calls us to action. Yet, many of us struggle to […]

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8 Qualities of a Good Coach
Every coach should possess - or at least aim to cultivate these coaching attributes and qualities of an effective coach - in order to show up for clients and deliver optimal coaching results. We've curated a list of 8 qualities of a coach that we believe are a must-have, reflecting the traits of a good coach and underscoring what makes a ...
PDF QUALITIES OF A GREAT SPORTS COACH
While a good coach knows a great deal about a sport (s) he/she must continue to learn and develop new training techniques. Staying up-to-date and informed of new research, training and everything which supports the coaching process, attending coaching clinics and camps, and seeking out tips from other coaches and athletes are a sign of a great ...
The Role of a Coach: Much More Than Just Sports Essay
Characteristics Of A Good Coach Essay. The coach tirelessly pursues personal education, formally and informally, both in the performance related sciences and in liberal arts. He sees the journey to coaching excellence as a never ending story; seen not only in terms of a chosen sport and coaching theory and practice, but in understanding how to ...
Characteristics Of A Good Coach Essay
Characteristics of a good coach 1. Keep Vision and Values Front and Centre. The coach is visionary and lives life by adhering to core values. He should have very real strength of character and commitment to personal integrity and honesty. Winning at any point should never come at the expense of values. 2.
What Makes a Good Coach
Characteristics Of A Good Coach Essay. 1046 Words; 5 Pages; Characteristics Of A Good Coach Essay. The coach is visionary and lives life by adhering to core values. He should have very real strength of character and commitment to personal integrity and honesty. 1046 Words; 5 Pages; Decent Essays. Read More. Better Essays.
30 qualities of a good coach (with examples)
Have a good look at the list and think of 5 to 10 qualities that describe a good coach and try to find a coach that has them. 01. A good coach is a good listener. You know you're working with a good coach when you feel listened to. A good coach listens actively and gives you their full attention.
Becoming An Effective Coach Essay
Becoming An Effective Coach Essay "A coach is someone who tells you what you don't want to hear, who has you see what you don't want to see, so you can be who you have always known you could be" (Tom Landry). ... Putting players down, telling them they aren't good enough, or embarrassing them in front of their teammates will influence ...
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So getting the dose right is one way you can be a great coach. Give me a few other examples of what the best coaches do. ... And he wrote his personal vision essay all about promise keepers. He ...
What Makes a Great Coach? 6 Qualities to Look For
A great coach takes you the extra mile. If you want to hire a coach for you or your business, it's important to understand what makes a great coach. A good coach does more than deliver encouraging pep talks to their clients. They understand where you are on your journey and help you find the best way to reach your goals.
What Makes a Great Coach: Unlocking Excellence
A great coach is defined by their ability to lead and inspire others to reach beyond their current situation, and achieve something extraordinary. Great coaches are more than just their use of words or tools - they have a unique ability to drive action, optimize resources and elevate individuals to new heights of achievement. ...