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My Experience Growing Up from Broken Family

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Published: Jun 5, 2019

Words: 1295 | Pages: 3 | 7 min read

Works Cited

• Ahmadi, S., & Sadeghi, H. (2015). The relationship between family function and mental health in female students of high schools in Tehran. Iranian Journal of Psychiatric Nursing, 2(2), 1-6.
• Bernstein, D. P., & Fink, L. (1998). Childhood Trauma Questionnaire: A retrospective self-report manual. The Psychological Corporation.
• Brazelton, T. B. (1992). Touchpoints: Your child's emotional and behavioral development. Addison-Wesley Publishing Company.
• Chauhan, P., Gupta, R., & Parmar, R. (2018). A study on parent-child relationship and mental health of adolescents. International Journal of Indian Psychology, 6(3), 124-131.
• Gardner, T. W., & Ward, S. (2016). Life span developmental psychology: Introduction to research methods. Routledge.
• Goodman, R. (2001). Psychometric properties of the strengths and difficulties questionnaire. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 40(11), 1337-1345.
• Hough, M. (2017). Marriage, divorce, remarriage. Open University Press.
• King, D. (2009). The impact of family breakdown on children's well-being: Evidence review. The Scottish Government.
• Lopez, F. G., Castro, N., & Rincón, P. (2013). Mexican-American men's and women's preferences for and attitudes toward counseling. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 60(2), 227-235.
• Santrock, J. W. (2017). Life-span development. McGraw-Hill Education.

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I Grew Up In A Broken Home, But It Shaped Me And I’m Blessed For It

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People always ask me if it was hard coming from a broken family. By broken they’re referring to the fact that my parents divorced earlier than I can remember, both went through multiple relationships, and my siblings didn’t always have the same last name as me. From as early as I can remember, my parents didn’t get along, I was passed back and forth on a strict schedule as if the custody papers were actually a child rental agreement. I didn’t understand why my parents didn’t get along but even more confusing, I didn’t understand how they ever got along with each other. Honestly, it’s a miracle I was conceived. My friends would always ask if I wished they were still married but I couldn’t picture them together so that was always a quick and easy, no.

The hardest part about coming from a broken home isn’t that your parents aren’t in love anymore. The hardest part is that it’s not about you. When I say not about you, I mean nothing, nada. Even things you would think should be about you like your schedule, your school lunch money, your clothes, your extracurricular activities – they’re not about you, they’re all about the other parent. I felt like my parents spent more time trying to get back at one another, or jab each other, than actually tend to my needs. Being an only child only amplified the situation. I think with a few more biological siblings, they might have been too distracted but as an only child, my mom definitely had way too much time on her hands.

Whenever someone reacts to my childhood with sympathy I am always a little perplexed. If anything I feel fortunate to have come from a ‘broken home’. While people like to scoff at the fact that my dad has been married two times since my mom, I feel like I am the one who should be laughing because I’m rolling five deep when it comes to parental support after you count my mom’s beau who has been in my life since I was five. I might have been born an only child but I have been blessed with six siblings as a result of divorce (thank God, let’s face it I probably would have gone crazy by myself). I have one half brother and if my dad and his mom had never split I would not be here. What used to be a battle between attending 2 Christmas’s became a battle between 4 Christmas’s since I still visit my ex-step-mom’s house on the holidays. I can’t help but smile and feel loved. It’s hard not to feel the support of that many people.

I’ve gone through things I’d rather not relive. There were times that weren’t great and times that were downright awful, but whose family doesn’t have those times? I’d say the true meaning of family is having those rough edges that can make things uncomfortable with them but yet still make them your first choice above all else. Without my mom’s boyfriend, who would I go to when she has one of her moods? Heck, who would she go to when I have one of mine? Having a broken home teaches you that blood isn’t always thicker than water (sometimes it’s just as thick), forgiveness is possible, and although we were both grown adults, it was possible for my dad to find someone who would love me and my brother like we were her own.

Avolyn Fisher

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Cause and Effect of Broken Family: Exploring the Impact on Individuals and Society

Table of contents, causes of broken families, effects on individuals, consequences for society, addressing the impact, conclusion: fostering resilience and support.

• Amato, P. R. (2000). The consequences of divorce for adults and children. Journal of Marriage and Family, 62(4), 1269-1287.
• McLanahan, S., & Sandefur, G. (1994). Growing up with a single parent: What hurts, what helps. Harvard University Press.
• Heath, A. F., & Killewald, A. (2013). The importance of nonresident fathers for children's well-being. Annual Review of Sociology, 39, 149-170.
• Braver, S. L., Wolchik, S. A., Sandler, I. N., Sheets, V., Fogas, B., & Bay, R. C. (1993). A longitudinal study of noncustodial parents: Parents without children. Journal of Family Psychology, 7(1), 9-23.
• Wallerstein, J. S., & Kelly, J. B. (1980). Surviving the breakup: How children and parents cope with divorce. Basic Books.

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Having a Broken Family: What It Means and How to Cope

Brittany is a health and lifestyle writer and former staffer at TODAY on NBC and CBS News. She's also contributed to dozens of magazines.

Ivy Kwong, LMFT, is a psychotherapist specializing in relationships, love and intimacy, trauma and codependency, and AAPI mental health.  

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Even the most seemingly idyllic families face problems, and sometimes it can be hard to determine exactly how to go about navigating these issues. In the most extreme cases, certain problems can even lead to estrangement when relationships are severed for a prolonged period of time.

Often called broken families, there are many potential causes of estrangement between family members, and many of them come down to specific details surrounding the individuals and the situations involved. To find out more about what causes these relational rifts, as well as how to solve them, Verywell Mind tapped Frank Anderson, MD , a psychiatrist and psychotherapist, who specializes in the treatment of trauma.

"A broken family is one that includes unhealthy or severed relationships within the family unit," explains Anderson. "They are often associated with divorce but certainly can occur in an intact family where various members are in conflict with or estranged from each other." 

What Causes Estrangement Between Family Members?

While every relationship is unique, Anderson explained some common causes of estrangement among family members:

• Abuse: Anderson notes that this can include sexual, physical, or emotional abuse. While abuse is typically a result of some other factor (mental health problems, for example), it can cause relationship trauma and it's understandable if it complicates your ability to forgive.
• Mental health issues: If you or your family member faced mental health conditions or substance use issues that resulted in the estrangement, it's important to address those issues before moving forward with attempting to fix the relationship. If you were struggling with the issues, make sure you seek help from a therapist and then communicate to the family member that you have sought help and moved forward. If a family member was the one dealing with mental health issues, it's OK to ask them if they've addressed the issues by seeking out help.
• Financial abuse: Money can complicate any relationship, but this is especially true for loved ones. In a marriage, one person may be spending beyond the budget, or overly controlling with the money. Serious issues can arise when there is a death of a parent, and the children do not agree on how the assets are distributed among them. That said, many times these issues can be remedied by being open and honest about your concerns.
• Differing beliefs: This can come into play in a variety of ways—such as political or religious—and if it impacts your ability or your family member's ability to be kind and respectful, then it can become a major problem.
• Boundary crossings: This is perhaps especially true for immediate family members like parents or siblings. In these cases, it's especially important to make sure you've made the person aware of your boundaries so that they know exactly what it is that offends you. It's also important to listen to your family members if they are trying to explain their boundaries to you.
• Overly controlling parents or parental figures: While parents or parental figures often mean well , they can sometimes push too far when it comes to exerting their control. If this is carrying over into your personal life and impacting your relationships as an adult, it's important to make your parents aware of the ways they're affecting your life.
• Refusals to apologize: If you or a loved one are refusing to apologize , it's especially important to make sure you understand the other person's motives. If you feel that everyone's reasoning has been considered and there's still a refusal to apologize, this can cause a major rift.

How Do You Know When a Familial Relationship Is Worth Saving?

First off, it's important to be honest with yourself about the nature of the relationship you had with this family member before things went sour. Was it meaningful and positive or is the relationship's history lined with toxicity ? If you do find that it was meaningful and positive, it may be worth mending.

Broken families are repairable when the involved parties are willing to meet together, to listen to each other’s point of view, and to be able to freely discuss their differences with the intention of resolving the conflict and repairing the relationship.

How to Effectively Repair Relationships With Family Members

In order to effectively repair a relationship, Anderson emphasizes the importance of both parties' willingness to "forgo a defensive posture." By this, he means that each party should be willing to listen to the other, even if this means hearing things that are potentially hurtful. It also requires both parties to speak honestly and openly about their feelings.

"If at any time it becomes unsafe to anyone involved, each party should have the freedom to end the discussion, perhaps postpone it for another time or leave it without further follow-up if necessary," says Anderson.

If you want to speak with a family member, but you're worried that things will get too heated for either person, it may be helpful to enlist the help of a mediator.

"It is often helpful to have a third-party present to arbitrate the discussion," says Anderson. "The neutral party should be able to feel empowered to speak up when necessary and establish boundaries and guidelines for the ensuing discussion."

How to Accept That a Family Relationship Is Over

Sometimes, it is better to end the relationship completely. When a family member continues to be toxic, abusive, unapologetic, or unwilling to seek professional help, then you will not be able to successfully resolve conflict with this person and they will continue to hurt you.

It's important to note that you can forgive someone without reinstating a relationship with that person. In fact, it's better for your mental health if you forgive them because it can help you find peace.

"Forgiveness is something that is achieved internally," says Anderson. "It does not necessarily require the other person to be present in order for it to be meaningful, successful, and long-lasting."

Anderson emphasizes the importance of therapy when it comes to processing the end of any important relationship. While it may take some time, if you're open to mentally forgiving someone, you can move past it in a way that brings you internal peace.

"It is certainly possible, in the context of a supportive therapeutic setting, to work through, resolve, release, and forgive a family member who has hurt you, even if you don’t have contact with them," says Anderson.

A Word From Verywell

Relationships are complicated and even the most ideal family will have conflict at some point. Oftentimes, conflict can be resolved with effective communication, forgiveness, and sometimes the aid of professional help. Other times, the family unit is broken, conflict cannot be resolved, and you may find yourself estranged from certain family members.

It can be difficult to accept a relationship is broken, but maintaining healthy boundaries in your family relationships can prevent further pain.

Moving past hurtful things from the past is possible, and you will be better for it. Whether you need to forgive a family member for yourself or in order to mend a relationship, it's always best to make sure you do what's going to benefit your mental health.

By Brittany Loggins Brittany is a health and lifestyle writer and former staffer at TODAY on NBC and CBS News. She's also contributed to dozens of magazines.

Learning to Accept My Broken Family

Written By Sheila May, originally in Bahasa Indonesia

“ My biggest mistake in life is marrying you !” Since I was in kindergarten, I would often hear my parents hurl that statement at each other; they fought right before our eyes. And almost every day, my siblings and I had to be their mediators. When I was 12 years old, my parents decided to separate.

“Don’t bother about it. That is their business.” That was the first thought that crossed my mind when I found out about their decision to separate. As I grew older, however, I realized that the problem was even bigger than I thought. I was right in the centre of it. I could not simply ignore it. I was frustrated.

As time went by, “family” became a topic I always avoided in my chat with friends. I tried to erase that word from my mind. One day, I got a ride with my friend’s family. As I sat in the back of the car and watched them banter and exchange jokes with one another, a warm feeling came over my heart. I cried silently. I was happy, sad, and sorry for myself, all at the same time. I told myself, “So this is what a family is all about.”

Looking at my own family, I felt very disappointed and angry. I hated everyone in my family and I didn’t bother to keep my emotions hidden. I expressed my thoughts and emotions openly to my friends. They started to keep their distance from me. I was tired of living with my family, but I had nowhere to go. I felt as though I was going crazy.

In the three years after my parents separated, I tried my best to spend as little time as possible at home. I walked home from school so that I did not have to reach home early. The only reason I went home was to sleep at night. One day, a friend invited me to her church. I agreed immediately. After all, it was a good reason to stay away from home. I later found out that her church was going to hold a three-day retreat. Three days away from home? Yes, count me in!

Those three days changed my life forever. It was there that God saved me. I realized my sinful nature, and at the same time, I came to know the forgiveness and love He was offering me. I felt immensely thankful.

But it was not as though everything became perfect immediately. Back home, I still faced the same battles every day. I did not automatically become a good, nice, and obedient child. I continued to struggle against my sinful characteristics. I still could not accept my family.

Throughout that time, God held my hand and waited patiently for me to get over my rebellious phase. When I finally sat down and examined the pieces of my broken family, I realized that brokenness was everywhere, not just in my family. Everyone faced problems, whether they were friends, neighbors, religious people or secular people—even those in full-time ministry did too. What I had been going through all these years was a reflection of the reality of this fallen world; I was not the only one facing these battles. There were millions of others facing similar battles, some worse than mine.

I also came to realize that while I did not choose to be born into my family, God had chosen to place me here. And if He had sent His own son, Jesus, to give His life to save my soul, how could I doubt His love for me? He is a good Father, and it must be in His divine purpose to place me, His daughter, here, although I have not understood it yet. The best thing I can do for my future is to fully accept myself and this family God has placed me in.

Being able to do this has opened my heart. Although there have not been many changes in my family in the 10 years that have passed since I became a Christian, I can see many transformations in my own life. God has used my family situation to shape me. I’ve learned to control my emotions when I am provoked, I’ve learned to forgive even when I may be hurt again, and I’ve learned to love those whom I do not think deserve it.

God did not change my life situation in order to change my heart. He let me experience what it means to lose hope so that I can see Him as the only hope in my life. He is too good to be unkind and too wise to be mistaken. He provides healing for my hurts, He provides comfort for my tears (2 Cor 1:3-4). In all things, He has a purpose (Rom 8:28-29). And, in every situation, He gives strength (Phil 4:13).

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Essay on Effects Of Broken Family

Students are often asked to write an essay on Effects Of Broken Family in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

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100 Words Essay on Effects Of Broken Family

Introduction.

A broken family refers to a family where parents live apart due to divorce, separation, or death. This situation can have different effects on the family members, especially children.

Emotional Effects

Kids in a broken family often experience emotional stress. They may feel sad, angry, or confused about the situation. This can lead to problems like depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem.

Academic Performance

The emotional turmoil can affect a child’s focus in school. They might find it hard to concentrate on studies, leading to a drop in their academic performance.

Social Skills

Children from broken families might struggle with social skills. They may find it difficult to trust others and build healthy relationships. This can lead to loneliness and isolation.

Behavioral Issues

The stress and confusion can lead to behavioral issues. Children may become rebellious, aggressive, or withdrawn. They might also get involved in risky behaviors like substance abuse.

In conclusion, a broken family can have various negative effects on a child’s emotional health, academic performance, social skills, and behavior. It’s important to provide support and understanding to help them cope.

250 Words Essay on Effects Of Broken Family

A broken family refers to a family where the parents are separated or divorced. This situation can have a big impact on the children and other family members.

Emotional Impact

The first effect of a broken family is the emotional impact on the children. Children may feel a deep sense of loss and sadness. They may also feel confused and scared about what will happen to them. This can lead to feelings of loneliness and depression.

Another effect of a broken family is on a child’s school performance. The stress and emotional turmoil can make it hard for a child to focus on their studies. This can result in lower grades and a lack of interest in school.

Children from broken families may also struggle with social skills. They may find it hard to trust others and form healthy relationships. This can lead to feelings of isolation and difficulty fitting in with their peers.

Behavioural Changes

Broken families can also lead to changes in a child’s behaviour. Some children may act out, become aggressive, or start to engage in risky behaviours. This is often a way for them to express their feelings of anger and frustration.

In conclusion, broken families can have a significant impact on a child’s emotional well-being, academic performance, social skills, and behaviour. It is important for parents, teachers, and other adults to provide support and understanding to help children cope with these challenges.

500 Words Essay on Effects Of Broken Family

A broken family is one where the parents are not living together. This can happen due to divorce, separation, or death. In such families, children often live with one parent or move between both. This situation can affect the children in several ways.

One of the main effects of a broken family is the emotional impact on children. They may feel sad, angry, or confused. They may blame themselves for their parents’ separation. This can lead to feelings of guilt and low self-esteem. They may also worry about the future and feel insecure.

A broken family can also affect a child’s performance in school. The stress and emotional turmoil can make it hard for them to focus on their studies. They may lose interest in school and their grades may drop. In some cases, they might even stop going to school.

Social Relationships

Children from broken families may have problems in their social relationships. They may find it hard to trust others and form close relationships. They may feel different from their peers who come from intact families. This can lead to feelings of isolation and loneliness.

Behavioral issues are another effect of a broken family. Children may act out their feelings of anger and sadness. They may become rebellious or start behaving in harmful ways. They may also develop problems like lying, stealing, or bullying.

Long-Term Effects

The effects of a broken family can also be seen in the long term. Children may carry the emotional scars into their adult life. They may have problems in their own relationships and may fear commitment. They may also struggle with issues like depression or anxiety.

In conclusion, a broken family can have many effects on children. It can affect their emotions, academic performance, social relationships, behavior, and even their future. It’s important for parents and other adults to provide support and help children cope with these challenges. This can help minimize the negative effects and ensure that children have a chance to grow up healthy and happy.

Remember, not all children in broken families will face these issues. Some may cope well and even thrive. It depends on many factors like the child’s personality, the support they get, and how the parents handle the situation.

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Can A Broken Family Be Fixed?

Conflict and instability within a family can severely disrupt family members' roles. For most people, their family is a core feature of their social support network. Good relationships with family members  increase mental health and provide protection and stability. When those relationships are disrupted or take on toxic traits, all family members have the potential to be affected.

Broken families come in many forms, and the approach to each one is different. If the dysfunction is severe or irreparable, such as when a parent passes away, professional help is often recommended. Qualified mental health professionals can use a  variety of techniques  to help a broken family recover or to help the family members reach a new, stable dynamic.

What does "broken" mean?

The  broken home theory has historically been used to explain why juveniles are delinquent. Originating in the 1970s, the broken home theory defined a broken family as a family structure that deviates from the ideal. In American families, the ideal is typically considered to be a two-parent nuclear family. In broken home theory, one or both parents are absent due to death, divorce, separation, or desertion. A family missing one or both parents and the subsequent lack of role models has frequently been used to explain poorly-behaved children and adolescents.

While a family can certainly be broken due to the loss of a family member, many people refer to a broken family as one that does not work together in an ideal way. Both parents may be present, but one or both may not be a good role model. In this way, the broken home theory still holds. In a  dysfunctional family , one or both parents may deviate from the ideal, producing similar (or sometimes more harmful) effects compared to leaving the family altogether. Extended family can be involved too. Conflict with aunts, uncles, and grandparents can also be dysfunctional.

For this article, "broken family" will refer to a family who has lost a parent, and "dysfunctional family" will refer to families who experience excessive conflict or instability. Both types of families will experience periods of difficulty, but no two situations will be the same. Some families may be grieving a loss of a parent, some families may be in an extended period of conflict, and others might be dealing with external issues, such as a parent's substance use disorder.

Broken from loss

This article will focus primarily on a family that is broken due to the permanent departure of one parent, either through death or abandonment. While divorce can undoubtedly break a family, if both parents are still involved in the children's lives, there is an opportunity for a new family dynamic. If you're worried about the impact a current or potential divorce may have on your family, there are  resources  to help you understand the impact the divorce may have on your family. A family broken from divorce can heal into a new, healthy dynamic. For children, good  co-parenting practices  can help introduce stability and reduce divorce's negative effects.

Grieving a broken family

When a parent leaves permanently, either through death or abandonment, there is no opportunity to co-parent or to re-establish a healthy family dynamic. After processing the circumstance of the other parent's departure, the remaining parent and children will have to establish a new family dynamic.  Grief is a natural part of this process, and processing grief is the first step toward a healthy recovery.

Grief is not a predictable thing. Everyone grieves differently, depending on their individual personalities and the circumstances they are grieving. For the remaining parent, the death of their partner will likely produce a very different type of grief than if their former partner abandoned the family. For the  children in the family , their grief is less likely to be affected by the circumstances of the loss. To them, the situation is simple. They have lost a parent.

Helping your family grieve

If you've lost your partner and are helping your children grieve the loss of a parent, the  first person  to take care of is you. Access your support network, and lean on people in your life you are compassionate and have the energy to share. Your extended family may also be grieving, and not everyone will be able to support you. Take note of the people who are offering support and use it. Don't put the needs of others before your own early in the grief process. If you  delay grieving and attempt to support others before you are ready, you can complicate or extend your grieving process.

Surround yourself and your family with loved ones, even if they share your grief.  Mourning together helps solidify family bonds. For children, having loved ones nearby, even if they are mourning, can help them feel safe and secure. Encourage the children to express their feelings healthily. Remember, children experience grief differently depending on their age. For example, young children may struggle to grasp the concept of death entirely, while older children or adolescents may struggle to express their feelings and the nuances of their grief.

Things will improve as the days and weeks pass since losing your partner. Recovering from grief starts slowly. Initially, you may only feel OK for a few hours. Eventually, those hours turn into days, and those days to weeks. Children typically follow a similar progression. However, in some cases, the grieving process can be disrupted, leading to  complicated grief . In complicated grief, the grieving process is not moving forward and generally requires professional help.

Dysfunctional from conflict

A dysfunctional family is one where conflict and instability prevent healthy family attachments. For the scope of this article, we will consider families where both parents are present, but conflict prevents happiness and stability in the home. The dysfunction "breaks" the family.

The functional family

The  characteristics of a healthy family define what a functional family looks like; significant deviation from the characteristics listed below indicates dysfunction. Healthy families typically do the following:

• Allow and accept emotional expression.
• Maintain consistent and obvious rules.
• Consistently treat family members with respect.
• All family members feel safe and secure in the home.
• Parents care for the children, and children do not provide significant care to younger siblings.
• Children have age-appropriate responsibilities.
• Perfection is not expected or considered attainable.

Overall, a functional family is one where the members are safe, happy, free to express themselves and know their family role. If that is not the case, the family can be considered dysfunctional. Dysfunctional families can have a  serious impact  on children in the home, leading to increased misbehavior and mental health concerns. Similarly, adults are affected by losing part of their  support network . Family typically provides an integral component of an individual's system of support.

Dysfunctional families can often be cyclical. For example, a parent's lack of support may result in a higher-than-average stress load. The stress reduces the effectiveness of their parenting, leading to increased misbehavior on the part of the child. The child's misbehavior increases the parent's stress, which further reduces their parenting effectiveness. Eventually, everyone is burnt-out, unhappy, and overstressed.

Making the dysfunctional functional

Family conflict is common, but excessive conflict can be harmful. Reducing conflict within a family typically begins by improving  family communication . Often, spending effort on better communication can help parents and children feel better understood and bring to light the root of ongoing conflict.

Improving communication starts with  ourselves . It is important to mediate our own emotions and bring peace to communication. This is especially important with children. Children do not have the same facility for communication as adults, and expectations for communication must be age appropriate. Still, each child should have an opportunity to express their feelings in a safe, secure environment.

As a parent,  improving communication  also means being available and willing to listen actively. Show your child you are listening by making eye contact and waiting for them to finish speaking before you address their thoughts. Be empathetic and compassionate in your communication, and never punish a healthy display of emotion. Most importantly, take time to model good communication with other family members such as other children, your partner, or extended family.

When to seek therapy

There is usually a path to happiness for any broken or dysfunctional family. However, that path may take a lot of work to find. If you are having trouble getting your family on the path to healing,  online therapy  is an excellent resource to investigate. Online therapists are licensed and use the same evidence-based methods as in-office therapists, like  structural family therapy . You can avoid the hassle of packing up you or your family and traveling to an office; therapy takes place from the comfort of your home. Although the setting is different, research shows that visiting a therapist online is  just as effective  as seeing one in an office.

Below are some reviews of  Regain counselors for you to review, from people experiencing similar issues.

Counselor reviews

“Yumi is amazing and a perfect fit for us. Just having one video session help our family so much in so many ways. He responses are on point and we value it greatly. I can’t thank her enough for all she has continued to do to strengthen our family. I would recommend her to the world that’s how amazing she is.”

“I had left my family when I contacted Regain with the hope of salvaging a completely broken down relationship. Bradley was allocated to us. Bradley made one step at a time, said the right things at the right time and just seemed to get in tune with us to understand what was required in order to help resolve our relationship. He worked with us about once a week at the start then going more to once every ten days in the latter part of the counseling for about six months. We have managed to resolve our differences and are looking forward to a prosperous future in a healthy relationship. Bradley has given us the tools required to make sure we can quickly identify and know how to resolve any problems arising in the future. We couldn’t recommend him more. Thank you so much, Bradly and Regain!”

Families can be broken for almost any reason, but there is always hope. Whether your family is grieving a loss or experiencing conflict and emotional turmoil, there are resources that can help. Families can see results quickly by working to improve their communication, strengthen family bonds, and understand their grieving process. If conflict or grief becomes excessive or does not improve, a mental health professional can help guide the process forward.

FAQ (Frequently asked questions)

What is a broken family?

As a child, you don’t realize it, but this environment’s effects are life changing. There could be abuse or neglect. And there’s definitely a lack of support for a child or children in the family. The environment isn’t a loving one. The reason it’s a toxic dynamic is that these individuals aren’t caring for one another. These behaviors have been happening for a long time. The parents didn’t give the children the home life that they needed, and the family dynamics were unhealthy. The children don’t feel loved or safe. For healthy child development, there needs to be a stable family unit where parents and children care for one another. When kids see that their parents are unhealthy or toxic at a young age, the child’s life is at risk of developing further emotional problems. These are long term effects because the vast majority of children who are abused grow into young adults who have psychological or mental health problems. You can read articles on broken families on Psychology Today. There you can learn about the different aspects of the family unit and child development. If you come from a broken family, it can be helpful to attend a support group where you can get advice from other people who have grown up in dysfunctional family units. A broken family could have short term effects on a person as well as long term ones. In your life, no matter what, you will interact with your family. But, you get to choose what happens to those familial relationships after you become an adult. You get to decide what level of involvement you want to have with your family. If you are estranged from your biological loved ones, you may not know how to cope. Coming from a broken family doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. It’s a frame of reference for why you have your set of core beliefs about family.

What are the effects of a broken family?

A broken family can be life changing. It can have severe effects on a person. In your life, no matter what happens, you will meet people who have endured a broken home environment. People in broken families may seek out support groups as adults, because they were put through neglect or abuse at a young age, and they don’t know the best ways to cope with their lives. Children in a broken family don’t feel safe. They’re afraid that at any moment something will go wrong. That anxiety will likely follow them into adulthood. As grownups, they may have mental health problems, such as PTSD, anxiety, or depression. These individuals may have difficulty connecting with others, forming attachments, or maintaining healthy relationships. There’s a large percent of children from broken families who don’t trust others and have difficulty forming emotional bonds with people. When you come from a broken family, you can create a better tomorrow by seeking therapy. The home life you experienced as a young person will influence the adult you become. You may have had a lack of support as a child, but you can recover from the effects of a broken family in your life no matter what, by finding a therapist who can give you that lasting support. If you’re unsure if you have been raised in a broken family, you can read about these dynamics in Psychology Today. You may gain some clarity into your childhood after reading these articles. Psychology Today has a wealth of resources for people who have suffered from childhood trauma. Depending on what issues you’re experiencing, you can find experts who have written about that type of trauma. On Psychology Today, you can also search for a therapist in your area. Getting treatment for trauma is crucial. And you don’t have to see a therapist in person! There are an increasing number of therapists available as online therapy becomes more and more popular. Our childhood scars don’t go away and can be painful if they are not addressed. Therapy is an excellent and safe place to talk about your pain and work through it with a mental health professional who cares.

What causes a broken family?

The causes of a broken family are that the parents have significant mental health problems, and they are not getting treated. You can read the studies about this on Psychology Today. When you have a mental illness, and you get the treatment, it can be life changing. That’s why therapy is so valuable. In a broken home, there is no treatment happening for mental health problems. There’s abuse or neglect, or substance abuse. The home life is unsafe or unstable. The family dynamics are unhealthy and causing dysfunction. Child development is crucial, and if you don’t have a healthy childhood, that can impact your adulthood.

What to do if you have a broken family?

If you have a broken family, it’s important that you seek help in the form of therapy. People don’t ask to be born into a toxic environment. But, you can get support after enduring one. Your home life as a child doesn’t have to define who you are now. When you seek help for your trauma, it’s life changing. There are many resources where you can read about traumatic experiences in early life. You can find articles about family dynamics, and what it’s to survive a broken home on Psychology Today. They may also have some articles that bring you out of your comfort zone. In the long run, it’s better to get treatment rather than ignoring how your childhood broken home is affecting your current life. One of the best ways to address these concerns is with an individual therapist or family therapist.

What’s considered a broken home?

A broken home is one where the parents are not caring for the children. The kids are abused or neglected. When the children are victims of abuse, and they don’t get treatment, that’s one example of a broken family home. In a broken home, quality time isn’t important. 

Can a broken family be fixed?

You can read about family therapy in Psychology Today and see what the value is to people.

How do you love someone with a broken family?

Love has to do with acceptance. When you find someone who you love, it’s life changing. It brings you outside of your comfort zone. When you’re starting a new life with someone, it’s crucial to accept who they are. If you love someone who has a broken family, it means that you accept that they’ve had some trauma in their life, and you’re there to support them. You weren’t there, and you don’t know what they’re family life was like, or how it felt to be them as a child. You can ask them questions about it, but understand that some of these memories may be too traumatic to talk about at times. Everyone has a different family life. Psychology Today has many different resources for broken families. You can read about the life changing effects that broken homes have on children.

What are the signs of a broken family? How do you deal with a broken family? How does a broken family affect you emotionally? 

• Where To Find Free Or Low-Cost Therapy For Families Medically reviewed by Andrea Brant , LMHC
• What Is The Family Systems Theory?

What It’s Like To Be Part Of A Broken Family

Being part of a broken family is something that many people live with, though a lot of the time, they don’t show it.

That one kid from class, a work-mate or even that cashier from your local Woolies could come from a broken family and you’d never even realise.

You learn from a young age that people are often insensitive, as most people don’t care about what’s going on at your home and often don’t acknowledge it if they don’t see it. While you’re not seeking any pity, a little consideration goes a long way. However, you go on to learn that if it doesn’t leave a physical mark, people often don’t care.

When you come from a broken family, it feels like you’re isolated and cut-off from the rest of the world. Being so distant to a parent or a sibling often pressures you into feeling like you need to deal with it by yourself. Why? Because it’s embarrassing.

It’s embarrassing because it feels like you’re the only one with a family who can’t seem to get along. It’s embarrassing because while everyone gets picked up by their parents, you’re left to hitching a ride or public transport.

It hurts. It hurts because it’s sometimes difficult to understand why your family is like this. Why you have to suffer while everyone else is so seemingly happy with their families. Why you hurt so badly when other families get along so well. Why it’s not your fault.

It’s difficult to accept that it’s not your fault. A spiralling mind with endless thoughts and loneliness with no escape often leads to self-blame and guilt; the feeling that your birth was a burden and the cause of this whole mess. But you learn to accept that it’s not your fault, ever so gradually; that you shouldn’t take responsibility for other people’s actions.

Most holidays pretty much suck. This is when an abundance of friends’ family pictures flow through your feeds, capturing everything your family isn’t. Christmas is especially bad. You hear of your friends’ families travelling overseas just to be with their extended relatives. It’s astounding and you just long to be part of a family willing to go to such lengths to be with each other.

You dread parent teacher nights. It gives you anxiety because you don’t want your teachers to call home; you don’t want your teachers to know of your situation.

You hate every other event that requires a parent present, and it makes you crazy jealous when you see other parents who care enough to make such an effort with their children.

That being said, while it does suck to come from a broken family, you learn many things. You learn to endure hardships and persist in the face of adversity. You learn to face and deal with embarrassment. You gain a unique sense of compassion and empathy. You know to never mistreat someone as you never know what they have to face at home.

With these experiences, you form strong bonds between your friends and while you fear one day creating a broken family of your own, you know you’ll do whatever it takes to uphold a happy and supporting household.

Visit ReachOut to get support to help you with everything from everyday issues through to tough times.

Congratulations to Julia for winning this writing challenge, answering: My Favourite Moment of 2016. Julia wins a $50 Westfield gift card for her submission. For your chance to win, check out our latest writing challenges in our Comps section . Also, be sure to follow this guide on how to win the writing challenge !

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Home / Essay Samples / Life / Divorce / Broken Families: Research on the Effects of Divorce

Broken Families: Research on the Effects of Divorce

• Category: Life , Sociology
• Topic: Divorce , Divorce Rate , Single Parenting

Pages: 3 (1425 words)

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Works Cited

• Foreman, P. G. (2017). The Christian Recorder, Broken Families and Educated Nations in Julia C. Collins’s Civil War Novel The Curse of Caste. African American Review, 50(4), 1063–1074. https://doi.org/10.1353/afa.2017.0161

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