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Essays About Discovering Yourself: Top 5 Examples

Discover our top examples on essays about discovering yourself, plus prompts to guide you in writing your next essay.

Self-discovery is both a daunting and fantastic journey. Each person has a unique path to take. Reflecting on who you were, are, and will be is a lifelong adventure that includes constant self-examination. Because of self-discovery, we learn more about ourselves and become more in control of our decisions and wants in life.

A deep connection with our inner selves is critical to living an accomplished life. It’s an essential factor for us to thrive without overthinking the hurdles that will continuously challenge us along the way. Discovering yourself doesn’t only benefit you. It also helps you cultivate healthy relationships with other people and the community.

To write a powerful self-discovery essay, read through our examples below.

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1. My Journey Of Self Discovery by Anonymous on Samplius.com

2. discovering myself by claire van de weghe, 3. answering the question of “who i am” by anonymous on gradesfixer.com, 4. finding yourself vs. creating yourself by lukas supovitz-aznar, 5. finding myself by megan of manasquan, nj, 1. who am i, 2. my best qualities, 3. private me vs. public me , 4. my journey to self acceptance, 5. me: the good and the bad, 6. self discovery and bad experiences, 7. who i aspire to be.

“High school has taught me about myself, and that is the most important lesson I could have learned. This metamorphosis has taken me from what I used to be what I am now.”

The writer shares their transformation from a shy and introverted high schooler to a vocal individual who’s not afraid to share opinions. They did it through education and keeping their emotions in check. If before the author thought that mistakes meant they failed, now they believe mistakes are okay as long as they learned something from them.

Aside from taking pride in how they can now think for themselves through developing courage, the writer also reminds the readers that they need to believe in themselves no matter their challenges. You might also be interested in these essays about the countryside .

“As someone who has always wanted to do good in the world, I’ve struggled with the choice between taking care of myself and worrying about other people. I’ve come a long way, both regressing and progressing at different points, but throughout it all I’ve learned so many different lessons.”

Van De Weghe opens her essay by baring her previous attitude. She believed she needed to make people laugh so they would accept her. Next, she recounts how she found it overwhelming to be without her sister and any friends, ultimately deciding to stop attending school.

When she grew older, Van De Weghe adjusted her personality to fit each clique. Then, during the pandemic, when she didn’t need to be around others, she had the time to reflect on who she wanted to be. Finally, she concludes her essay with the realization that she wants to be strong, no matter the pressure others force upon her. Van De Weghe believes that if she lives as her authentic self, she’ll be able to find her rightful place in the world.

“In this course of life, we not only learn what has been taught to us, but we also know ourselves in different ways… Who I am is always changing, I will always be learning, and evolving. Thus, the search for the answer to the questions of who I am is life long process.”

The writer starts with questions that pertain to their personal information (age, religious belief, etc.), eventually culminating in the question of who they are. In the next section, the author describes their personality and shares how they developed their disposition in life. 

The essay continues to share the author’s experiences that contribute to their character. These encounters include learning to swim, reading The Catcher in the Rye , relating to Holden Caulfield, and many other instances that let the readers better understand the writer.

“Naturally you are born with a certain amount of personality and talent through genetics, but success is created after you are born, not before. The search for real self is fiction, your personality is not waiting to be stumbled upon one day.”

Aznar is adamant about proving that “finding yourself” is only a manufactured concept. He doesn’t rely on “destiny” and instead believes people are responsible for creating themselves and their futures. He argues that having thoughts and ambitions molds a person’s character. That everyone is under the lifelong-experiment to invent and improve themselves by picking influences and defining constrictions. 

Aznar adds a news article about social construct, an interview with actor Will Smith regarding self-creation, and a take on The Great Gatsby concerning morals and destiny to prove his point further.

“I think that I know what I want, but sometimes it is hard to tell. I am still not exactly sure who I am, why I want certain things, why I can be so hardheaded and stubborn. I do not yet fully understand myself, which makes being a teenager quite frustrating at times.”

Megan uses a quote that resonates with the crux of her essay in her introduction. She then shares her frustration with her doubts regarding what she wants her future to be. She’s also frank about how taxing it is to be a teenager.

She elucidates how exasperation during her teenage years affects her mood and her family. However, she also notes how these formative years guide young people in handling real-world interactions. 

7 Helpful Writing Prompts on Essays About Discovering Yourself

Check out these top essay writing tips before you start your essay.

Essays About Discovering Yourself: Who Am I

Take the time to think of who you are as an individual, friend, or child of your parents. For this prompt, describe to your readers your interests and quirks. Give them an idea of why you are a unique human being. To make it more interesting, interview the people you constantly interact with and ask them for details that connect to you or your personality.

An excellent way to discover more positive things about yourself is to point out what you think makes you likable. Then, like the previous prompt, you can ask acquaintances to highlight your appealing characteristics. Next, add how you plan to develop and enhance these aspects.

This prompt is perfect if you constantly present different personalities in your private space versus when you meet the public. Include the reasons why you think facing the public seems like a performance. If you’re uncomfortable sharing your experience, select a well-known celebrity who needs to be careful of what they can let the general public see to protect their private lives. Then, discuss why creating various personalities help people cope or chip away at their real character over time. 

Everyone has insecurities we deal with in our lives. In your essay, share what you did before and the steps you are taking to accept yourself. These steps can include continuously curating your social media feed so you don’t see unrealistic body standards or having a gratitude journal.

Discovering yourself means identifying both the good and bad parts. To strengthen your self-trust and fully believe in yourself, acknowledge your unfavourable traits and how you can change them.

Narrate a bad experience that had a significant impact on you. Share the reason this encounter affected you and the way you perceive yourself. Then, tell your readers how you turned this bad experience into a chance to learn more about yourself.

Think of the characteristics that the “perfect” person has and why. In this essay, you can use celebrities or family members as role models, describe why they inspire you and what it is about them you wish to see in yourself. Then, among these many good attributes, pick the top five traits you aspire to have and share your reasons.

To convince your readers to start their self-discovery, you must be persuasive. See our guide on persuasive writing.

Self-Discovery Essays

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How to Write About Yourself in a College Essay | Examples

Published on September 21, 2021 by Kirsten Courault . Revised on May 31, 2023.

An insightful college admissions essay requires deep self-reflection, authenticity, and a balance between confidence and vulnerability. Your essay shouldn’t just be a resume of your experiences; colleges are looking for a story that demonstrates your most important values and qualities.

To write about your achievements and qualities without sounding arrogant, use specific stories to illustrate them. You can also write about challenges you’ve faced or mistakes you’ve made to show vulnerability and personal growth.

Table of contents

Start with self-reflection, how to write about challenges and mistakes, how to write about your achievements and qualities, how to write about a cliché experience, other interesting articles, frequently asked questions about college application essays.

Before you start writing, spend some time reflecting to identify your values and qualities. You should do a comprehensive brainstorming session, but here are a few questions to get you started:

  • What are three words your friends or family would use to describe you, and why would they choose them?
  • Whom do you admire most and why?
  • What are the top five things you are thankful for?
  • What has inspired your hobbies or future goals?
  • What are you most proud of? Ashamed of?

As you self-reflect, consider how your values and goals reflect your prospective university’s program and culture, and brainstorm stories that demonstrate the fit between the two.

Prevent plagiarism. Run a free check.

Writing about difficult experiences can be an effective way to show authenticity and create an emotional connection to the reader, but choose carefully which details to share, and aim to demonstrate how the experience helped you learn and grow.

Be vulnerable

It’s not necessary to have a tragic story or a huge confession. But you should openly share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences to evoke an emotional response from the reader. Even a cliché or mundane topic can be made interesting with honest reflection. This honesty is a preface to self-reflection and insight in the essay’s conclusion.

Don’t overshare

With difficult topics, you shouldn’t focus too much on negative aspects. Instead, use your challenging circumstances as a brief introduction to how you responded positively.

Share what you have learned

It’s okay to include your failure or mistakes in your essay if you include a lesson learned. After telling a descriptive, honest story, you should explain what you learned and how you applied it to your life.

While it’s good to sell your strengths, you also don’t want to come across as arrogant. Instead of just stating your extracurricular activities, achievements, or personal qualities, aim to discreetly incorporate them into your story.

Brag indirectly

Mention your extracurricular activities or awards in passing, not outright, to avoid sounding like you’re bragging from a resume.

Use stories to prove your qualities

Even if you don’t have any impressive academic achievements or extracurriculars, you can still demonstrate your academic or personal character. But you should use personal examples to provide proof. In other words, show evidence of your character instead of just telling.

Many high school students write about common topics such as sports, volunteer work, or their family. Your essay topic doesn’t have to be groundbreaking, but do try to include unexpected personal details and your authentic voice to make your essay stand out .

To find an original angle, try these techniques:

  • Focus on a specific moment, and describe the scene using your five senses.
  • Mention objects that have special significance to you.
  • Instead of following a common story arc, include a surprising twist or insight.

Your unique voice can shed new perspective on a common human experience while also revealing your personality. When read out loud, the essay should sound like you are talking.

If you want to know more about academic writing , effective communication , or parts of speech , make sure to check out some of our other articles with explanations and examples.

Academic writing

  • Writing process
  • Transition words
  • Passive voice
  • Paraphrasing

 Communication

  • How to end an email
  • Ms, mrs, miss
  • How to start an email
  • I hope this email finds you well
  • Hope you are doing well

 Parts of speech

  • Personal pronouns
  • Conjunctions

First, spend time reflecting on your core values and character . You can start with these questions:

However, you should do a comprehensive brainstorming session to fully understand your values. Also consider how your values and goals match your prospective university’s program and culture. Then, brainstorm stories that illustrate the fit between the two.

When writing about yourself , including difficult experiences or failures can be a great way to show vulnerability and authenticity, but be careful not to overshare, and focus on showing how you matured from the experience.

Through specific stories, you can weave your achievements and qualities into your essay so that it doesn’t seem like you’re bragging from a resume.

Include specific, personal details and use your authentic voice to shed a new perspective on a common human experience.

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Courault, K. (2023, May 31). How to Write About Yourself in a College Essay | Examples. Scribbr. Retrieved August 21, 2024, from https://www.scribbr.com/college-essay/write-about-yourself/

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Self-discovery and self-exploration

Why self-discovery matters

What is the discovery process, the bottom line.

Who are you?

This is a deceptively simple question. You might answer with your name, but things become complicated if you dig a little deeper. Can you clearly name your interests, self-care requirements , work motivations, and life purpose ? 

That’s a lot to chew on! To some people, the answers come easily. For others, it requires more work. 

It’s worth considering your response to this question. Self-knowledge helps you to: 

  • Protect your mental health and   well-being
  • Be aware and thoughtful about how you present yourself to the world
  • Explore self-acceptance and treat yourself with more compassion
  • Uncover your personal values  
  • Stop caring about what others think and motivate yourself  

There’s a unique world living inside you. The hills and valleys are worth exploring. Like all good adventures, diving into yourself can be scary. It requires you to confront your fears, habits, and other gremlins holding you back.

But what is self-discovery, if not a worthy quest? Here’s our guide on how to get to know yourself better.

What are self-discovery and self-exploration?

Philosophers have deliberated over this question for years. Luckily, you don’t have to become a recluse to perform self-reflection. But you’ll need time and attention.

The 3 pillars of self-discovery

There are three important components to the discovery process:

  • Self-awareness

Self-exploration is about cultivating a deep understanding of your character, feelings, and desires. 

As you gain awareness of these elements, more parts of yourself will rise to the surface. High self-awareness gives you greater self-control, empathy, creativity, and self-esteem . You’ll also have increased job satisfaction, collaboration, and confidence when making decisions in your workplace .

Being aware of your idiosyncrasies also gives you a chance to reinvent yourself. You can’t change a behavior if you aren’t aware of it. 

The process of self-discovery is uncomfortable. It involves confronting parts of yourself that you may not like. But how can you learn to love that part of yourself or find a way to correct it if you refuse to acknowledge it? 

Self-discovery also involves trying new activities. Getting out of your comfort zone and challenging yourself to explore new things can be scary, but will help you discover more about your likes and dislikes. 

  • Intentional living

As you learn more about yourself, you will live with more purpose . You will make choices more aligned with who you are and who you want to become .

Using Inner Work® for self-discovery

Inner Work ® is the practice of looking inward to understand your authentic self and experiences. Inner Work isn't about dwelling in our past or ruminating on the present. Instead, it is a regular practice of starting in your inner world in order to achieve a particular purpose or result, to live and be in the world in a certain way. It means examining the habits and behaviors that affect our well-being and making changes where needed. 

You can use inner work to help you on your own journey of self-discovery by making time to deliberately engage across three dimensions (outlined by our CEO Alexi Robichaux):

  • Looking in and assessing how you act and who you are
  • Getting out of your space and habits.
  • Linking up with others to share your experience. Together you can create space to share your thoughts and reflect.

When you’re young, your peers can offer a form of self-discovery. Through them, you formed your taste and learned how to have healthy interactions with others. You may have also discovered the pitfalls of falling into cliques or having toxic relationships.

Finding your own sense of self as an adult can be tricky.  It’s easy to get lost in your environment or the people around you. Do you actually like that band, or do you just hear it at your friend’s house? While it’s important to have a group of close friends , independence will help you carve your own path in life. 

Here are some of the benefits of understanding yourself and what you can do with this identity:

  • Communicate your needs better 
  • Set clear boundaries
  • Make better decisions about your life and career
  • Compromise less on your values
  • Love and accept yourself
  • Take care of yourself and your body

The risks of not knowing yourself

When you don’t know yourself, you risk feeling a sense of self-alienation — a misalignment between you and your daily life. This can lead to feelings of sadness , guilt, or shame that you’re failing to live up to your full potential. 

woman-in-discomfort-what-is-self-discovery

You also risk succumbing to the whims of others. For example, your parents might pressure you to become a doctor. If you’re not clear whether you like medicine, it’s challenging to resist, leading to trouble further down the road.

Commitments of this magnitude aren’t worth the risk of doing what others want you to do.

Examples of self-discovery

Your self-discovery journey will be unique, but there are some common elements that everyone encounters. Here are some things you might experience along the way:

  • Becoming aware of your core values and beliefs . When you’re aware of what matters to you, you’ll make choices that are better aligned with who you are.
  • Identifying your needs at work and at home. You work and live better within certain environments. It’s important to know what you need from your environment so you don’t trap yourself somewhere that doesn’t fit.
  • Understanding your strengths and weaknesses. When you know what you’re good at , you’ll know how to add value to other people’s lives. This helps you fulfill your sense of purpose. 
  • Noticing and understanding your thought patterns. Many unconscious processes act on you every day. When you identify them, you can break toxic thought patterns holding you back .
  • Becoming more curious. Self-discovery teaches you how to learn . You’ll ask better questions of yourself and others, and seek out new and exciting information about the world.
  • Being more comfortable with change. When you know yourself, you can control yourself in times of change. Like a tree bending with the wind, you’ll learn to adapt .

woman-asking-questions-what-is-self-discovery

Now that you understand why self-discovery is important and what it can look like, we have some tips to help you on your journey. But first, let’s go over what you’ll be looking for.

What to look for in your self-discovery

Many pieces make you “you.” Answer these self-discovery questions to discover some key components about yourself:

  • Where did you come from, geographically and spiritually?
  • What fuels you? What depletes you?
  • Who would you like to be?
  • What are your interests?
  • What does your inner critic tell you about who you are? (Or aren’t?)
  • What does a life of meaning look like to you?

These are just the beginning. You’re a unique person, so you’ll discover several things that are impossible to list comprehensively here. You need to be observant and receptive to these discoveries.

Tips to get started

Now, here are some tips on how to explore your inner self:

1. Start journaling

Writing in a self-discovery journal  will help you organize your thoughts. After a couple of days or weeks, go back and read what you wrote. Look for patterns or other insights. This is a great place to start your gratitude practice , too. Gratitude will help you see what’s most impactful in your life.

2. Pay attention to the small things

Try to notice the little things all around you. This will teach you to also be more observant in other areas of your life, like when you’re with your family or at work.

3. Question yourself

Question your habits, thoughts, and behaviors. Ask if they serve you or the person you want to become.

4. Meditate

Mindfulness and meditation will help calm your mind. Make room for truths to emerge, and let go of negative thoughts.

5. Trust yourself

Self-discovery is a vulnerable and challenging experience. Practice self-compassion  and self-love. Trust that you’ll be able to get through this.

6. Be curious without judgment

Investigate your thoughts, behaviors, and personal values . Ask why they’re there and where they come from.

happy-man-with-trumpet-what-is-self-discovery

7. Leave your comfort zone

Try new hobbies and activities. Take a class. Go on a trip. These experiences will reveal your likes and dislikes.

8. Learn from failure

You might try a new job or a new skill, and you might not succeed right away. Pay attention to these failures. They have something to teach you.

9. Choose habits intentionally

Pick habits that bring you closer to who you want to be. Be patient:  forming a habit takes time . Create a plan, use a habit-tracking app, and stick to it.

10. Dream big

Your dreams and aspirations say a lot about who you are. Pay attention to them, and don’t be afraid to chase them down.

11. Ask for guidance

Therapists and professional coaches are trained to help you get to know yourself. Techniques like cognitive behavioral therapy focus on helping you identify negative thoughts and feelings to break toxic cycles and make better choices for yourself.

businesswoman-asking-for-guidance-what-is-self-discovery

Next time someone asks you, “What is self-discovery?” you’ll be an expert. Even if you haven’t figured out who you are yet, the journey of self-discovery is an exciting one.

There are few things more thrilling than knowing who you are and who you want to become. This process will help you find a renewed sense of purpose and step closer to your authentic self.

This is meant to be an ongoing process that can improve all aspects of life. For help along the way, you can work with BetterUp . We’ll guide you through the process of Inner Work®, so you can start living the life you want.

Understand Yourself Better:

Big 5 Personality Test

Elizabeth Perry, ACC

Elizabeth Perry is a Coach Community Manager at BetterUp. She uses strategic engagement strategies to cultivate a learning community across a global network of Coaches through in-person and virtual experiences, technology-enabled platforms, and strategic coaching industry partnerships. With over 3 years of coaching experience and a certification in transformative leadership and life coaching from Sofia University, Elizabeth leverages transpersonal psychology expertise to help coaches and clients gain awareness of their behavioral and thought patterns, discover their purpose and passions, and elevate their potential. She is a lifelong student of psychology, personal growth, and human potential as well as an ICF-certified ACC transpersonal life and leadership Coach.

How to know yourself: Tips for beginning your self-discovery journey

Self-knowledge examples that will help you upgrade to you 2.0, the importance of knowing yourself: your key to fulfillment, 50 self-discovery questions for getting to know the real you, 10 self-discovery techniques to help you find yourself, overcome self-criticism by getting your inner critic to take a break, self-concept: what it is & how to change it (with examples), how to start journaling and ideas for what to write about, overcome self-doubt (once and for all): 8 tips to move forward, what is inner work® it’s the key to being a better leader, finding the way back to you — 9 tips on how to find yourself, 17 self-awareness activities for exploring yourself, use the wheel of life® tool to achieve better balance, discover how the johari window model sparks self-discovery, 90 journal prompts for self-discovery to get the ink flowing, stay connected with betterup, get our newsletter, event invites, plus product insights and research..

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How to Begin Your Self-Discovery Journey: 16 Best Questions

Self-discovery

As part of this process, we must not only search to determine what constitutes our true selves, but let go of objects of identification we’ve long mistaken for ourselves, requiring a balance of introspection and new experiences.

So let’s set sail.

In this article, we’ll give you a range of powerful questions to help you along your journey of self-discovery and point you toward further reading and resources.

Before you continue, you might like to download our three Meaning and Valued Living Exercises for free . These creative, science-based exercises will help you learn more about your values, motivations, and goals and will give you the tools to inspire a sense of meaning in the lives of your clients, students, or employees.

This Article Contains:

What is self-discovery according to psychology, fostering self-discovery skills: 10 examples & tips, why is the process important, a look at self-discovery coaching, 3 exercises, games, and activities for adults, best worksheets and journal prompts, 16 questions to ask yourself or your clients, helpful books & apps for your journey, tools from positivepsychology.com, a take-home message.

Drawing often from the field of philosophy , psychologists point to the illumination of our daimon (or ‘true self’) as the ultimate goal of self-discovery.

Formally defined, this true self is

“the central inner force common to all human beings and yet unique to each, which is the deep source of growth… [that is] free, healthy development in accordance with the potentials of one’s generic and individual nature.”

Horney, 1950, p. 17

As part of the process of searching for our true selves, we are ultimately working to identify three things (Waterman, 2011):

  • Personal potentials
  • Our purposes for living
  • Opportunities to act upon those potentials and purposes in living

The search for our true selves, therefore:

“refers to those processes, both intuitive and reasoned, by which those [personal, purpose-related] potentials are discovered and come to attain the status of personally concordant goals that are to be actualized.”

Waterman, 2011, p. 360

According to this view, a person’s true self essentially lies beneath the surface, and our task is to find, recognize, or understand that which already exists. Once you have, you can then make choices about your life and identity that are more consistent with this self-knowledge (Waterman, 2011).

Self-discovery support

Seek a supportive atmosphere

The more time we spend in the presence of supportive family, friends, lovers, and communities , the sooner we will be likely to discover our true nature. This is because warm and encouraging atmospheres facilitate feelings of inner security while providing the freedom to have our own feelings and thoughts (Horney, 1950).

To this end, here are some ideas to consider:

  • Seek quiet spaces and time out to facilitate reflection or journaling .
  • Join a social group whose interests and passions align with your own, such as a painting, writing, or poetry group.
  • Find a coach or therapist for a safe space to pursue self-discovery.
  • Set boundaries with people who discourage your individuality, negatively affect your emotions, or put you down.
  • Seek the company of people who inspire you, make you feel positive, and challenge your perception of yourself.

Identify your drifts

Pay close attention to the things you naturally love doing, or drifts, particularly those that are personally expressive . By paying attention to the subconscious pull of these activities, you can allow them to guide you toward your true self, stemming from your genetic makeup, upbringing, and experiences (Pagedar, 2021).

  • Our drifts tend to emerge when the mind is still, so try selecting a quiet day to do some meditation or practice some relaxation techniques.
  • Try to notice activities that cause you to slip into the state of flow , as these often point us toward our drifts.
  • Consider which activities you possess a natural aptitude or talent for, perhaps using a strengths-finding exercise .
  • Think about which activities you find intrinsically motivating . These are the activities you would undertake in the absence of external rewards, such as money or the approval of others.
  • Notice times when you feel a strong sense of personal responsibility to do something or have a unique vision about how something should be carried out.

3 meaning valued living exercises

Download 3 Meaning & Valued Living Exercises (PDF)

These detailed, science-based exercises will equip you or your clients with tools to find meaning in life help and pursue directions that are in alignment with values.

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By filling out your name and email address below.

To understand why self-discovery is so important, we must consider the consequences of failing to identify our true selves.

According to Horney (1950), when a person experiences a large discrepancy between their lived and real selves, they are likely to experience a sense of alienation from themselves. This remains true even if the person is successful in their activities and receives external rewards.

Such a person may often notice themselves wondering, “ Why am I doing this when it’s not who I really am? ” The consequence is a feeling of guilt or dissatisfaction if we fail to live up to an idealized version of ourselves that we cannot be.

Besides this negative emotional toll, the problem with pursuing such an ideal is that it will be rooted in externally derived standards of worth.

To illustrate, here are some examples:

  • A student feels pressure from their parents to pursue a prestigious career in law, even though this line of work does not inspire them.
  • A famous musician has mistaken their true self with their like of the status, prestige, and social validation they receive while performing.
  • A woman’s family talks her into finding a husband and settling down when she’d rather travel the world with her friends.
  • A son feels obligated to take over the family business when he’d prefer to start his own venture.

When we cannot live in alignment with our true selves, we must spend energy attempting to deny and distort our experiences to make sense of a pervasive lack of happiness and personal fulfillment. This ongoing effort can go so far as to produce psychological states and conditions such as depression (Waterman et al., 2010).

This is why self-discovery is so important.

Our goal in life should not be to pursue imagined or externally derived ideals, but rather to develop a more realistic understanding of our strengths and limitations. By doing so, we can avoid negative psychological states and self-actualize , feel contentment, and make better contributions to the world.

Self-discovery coaching

A growing trend in coaching, self-discovery coaching is about looking beyond specific goal pursuits (e.g., “I want to improve my self-esteem ”) to discover how we can live authentically and be truly happy .

Self-discovery coaching has many components, including (Elevate Life Project, n.d.):

  • Exploring your values to live in congruence with what’s most important to you
  • Discovering grounded confidence, centeredness, and strength
  • Identifying your abilities for making easier decisions

The role of a self-discovery coach in this process is to act as co-pilot on a client’s journey toward authentic fulfillment by challenging them, imbuing them with courage, and showing compassion.

self discovery essay examples

World’s Largest Positive Psychology Resource

The Positive Psychology Toolkit© is a groundbreaking practitioner resource containing over 500 science-based exercises , activities, interventions, questionnaires, and assessments created by experts using the latest positive psychology research.

Updated monthly. 100% Science-based.

“The best positive psychology resource out there!” — Emiliya Zhivotovskaya , Flourishing Center CEO

If you or your clients are looking to set off on a self-discovery journey, consider the following fun and insightful activities to get you started.

This exercise is a useful starting point for viewing yourself clearly in terms of values, beliefs, and more. The exercise guides users through a two-step process of considering themselves from the perspective of others, followed by a consideration of their self-perceptions at different times in their life.

Spontaneous collage

Collage is a fun and cathartic method of self-discovery that helps people bypass the socially protective aspects of the mind and reveal aspects of their authentic self. Best of all, no previous art experience is required.

For a great resource, check out Shelley Klammer’s 12-week online course and check out the #collageforselfdiscovery hashtag on Instagram to get inspired by others’ collages.

Kokology: The Game of Self-Discovery

Created by famous Japanese psychologists Tadahiko Nagao and Isamu Saito, kokology , the study of kokoro (“mind” or “spirit” in Japanese), is a fun and sometimes hilarious game for learning about yourself.

The game invites players to answer questions about seemingly innocent topics, such as the color of an imaginary bird that has flown in their window, to reveal profound insights in their answers.

Self-discovery journaling

Journaling and worksheets can both be hugely helpful for this purpose.

To help, look at some of the following free resources from our site:

  • Self-Awareness Worksheet for Adults This worksheet poses a series of 15 questions to help you discover more about your true self. Specifically, the questions tap into topics such as your talents/strengths, values, and barriers to living more authentically.
  • What Are My Qualities and Traits? This worksheet invites you to identify your top five and weakest two qualities from a list of 100 strengths. It then invites you to consider how you might shape, develop, and use your toolkit of identified strengths to better your life.
  • Reflecting on Three Things This worksheet invites you to explore what defines who you are. These reflections can include statements, objects, roles in life, people you admire, and ambitions.

If you’re more into journaling, see if any of the following prompts might inspire some of your upcoming entries (Hollis, 2019):

  • What things have you been doing lately that may be positively or negatively affecting your mental health ?
  • What ways can you touch or move your body that makes you feel good?
  • If you could spend the day doing anything, what would you do?
  • How do you show love to other people?
  • What are some things about you that you wish other people knew?

How to discover your authentic self – at any age – Bevy Smith

For more ways to get started on your journey of self-inquiry, consider the following questions, drawn from leading books designed to guide you toward self-discovery (see Helpful Books & Apps for Your Journey ):

Mindful self-discovery questions

  • What’s going on inside your body at the moment (e.g., sensations, flows of energy)?
  • Is there joy, ease, and lightness in what you are doing at the present moment?
  • Do you really have any problems right now in this present moment ?
  • Is there anything you can do to change, improve, or remove yourself from a present dissatisfactory situation? If not, how can you move toward accepting your present circumstances?

Exploring values

  • What are your top five personal and professional values?
  • How are you living outside your values?
  • In what areas do you feel a personal sense of responsibility to better the world?
  • How are you living outside of your integrity?

Questions about fear and courage

  • What do you fear the most?
  • What fears have actually come true in your life?
  • What would happen if you treated the actions you fear as an experiment?
  • For which pending decision could you use 10% more courage?

Considering worthwhile experiences

  • What has made your childhood worthwhile?
  • What lessons did you learn last week?
  • What makes life worthwhile for you?
  • What trip have you always wanted to take, and how could you make this trip happen?

More questions for self-discovery

For even more powerful coaching questions, be sure to check out some of the dedicated articles throughout our blog:

  • 73 Powerful Coaching Questions to Ask Your Clients
  • 100 Most Powerful Life Coaching Questions [+PDF]
  • Self-Coaching Model Explained: 56 Questions & Techniques for Self-Mastery

Here are some of our favorite books and apps to support greater self-insight and discovery.

1. The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment – Eckhart Tolle

The Power of Now

A critical first step toward greater self-insight involves ceasing to confuse your true self with the endless stream of thoughts flowing through your mind.

The bestselling book The Power of Now  takes readers on a journey to find their deepest self through the lens of mindfulness and spirituality.

The book guides the reader through steps to help recognize and free themselves from ego in the form of defense mechanisms, automatic negative habits, and over-identification with thought. From here, readers can then discover their true nature and lasting contentment, rooted in the present moment.

Find the book on Amazon .

2. Self-Discovery Questions: 155 Breakthrough Questions to Accelerate Massive Action – Barrie Davenport

Self-Discovery Questions

Not all of us have the resources to employ a self-discovery coach, making it all the more important to know what questions to ask on your self-discovery journey.

Barrie Davenport’s book of 155 powerful questions is a perfect companion for self-reflection and journaling, helping readers become less reactive and take charge of their lives and destiny.

Once you become acquainted with your answers, you can strengthen self-awareness, break out of automatic patterns, and feel empowered to make positive new life changes.

3. The 365 Self-Discovery Journal: One Year of Reflection & Development – Created by 21 Exercises

The 365 Self-Discovery Journal

Journaling remains one of the best ways to pursue self-discovery and greater self-insight (Charles, 2010).

This book provides journal lovers with a year’s worth of challenging and original questions to guide self-discovery.

By combining each prompt with thought-provoking poems and quotes, this book is an excellent tool to help steadily expand the reader’s comfort zone and curiosity across domains ranging from career and finances to love and relationships.

4. The Quenza app

Quenza Telepsychology Example

Quenza was designed by our very own team as a one-stop resource for coaches and psychologists wishing to remotely support their clients’ self-inquiry between scheduled sessions.

The app links with an online dashboard and growing library of science-backed activities you can customize and send directly to your clients’ smart devices, including audio meditations, guided visualizations, and many thought-provoking reflections.

Try the app, platform, and entire library of pre-built activities for 30 days for just $1.

5. The Waking Up app

Waking Up

While Western takes on meditation tend to emphasize health and stress reduction, there is much more we can discover about ourselves through this powerful practice.

Waking Up , developed by philosopher and neuroscientist Sam Harris, features a rich array of audio-based meditations, exercises, and conversations with leading experts and teachers to help you make profound discoveries about the nature of your own mind.

This app is a top-rated resource for those seeking to dismantle illusions of the self and rediscover their true nature and purpose.

6. The Reflectly app

Reflectly

With the growing recognition of journaling as a tool for self-insight, new technologies are emerging to support this powerful practice.

Reflectly is a modern journaling app for self-care and greater happiness. Drawing on evidence-based approaches from positive psychology, mindfulness, and Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, this app serves as an AI companion to help you manage negative thoughts and find greater happiness.

Among its personalized functions, the app includes daily quotes, a mood tracker , and personalized insights via its reporting features.

Throughout this post, we’ve discussed the importance of clarifying values to better understand what brings meaning throughout one’s journey of self-discovery. To this end, we invite you to check out our free Meaning & Valued Living Exercises Pack .

This pack features three of our top tools from the Positive Psychology Toolkit©, all of which center on the theme of values-based living:

  • The Top 5 Values This exercise draws on key principles of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to help clients begin brainstorming their values. Following this, clients will then prioritize these values in a list to identify those most central to who they are.
  • Self-Eulogy This exercise invites clients to consider how they’d like to be remembered at their funeral as a means to identify and clarify values. Based on this, they can then consider how well they are living in alignment with these values.
  • The Scoreboard Metaphor This exercise helps clients recognize how to enact their values through goal-setting. In particular, it draws on the metaphor of a basketball game to illustrate how living into one’s values is an ongoing process and that the paths by which we pursue our goals are opportunities to enact our values in daily life.

You can access all three exercises for free by downloading our Meaning & Valued Living Exercises Pack .

If you’re looking for more science-based ways to help others discover meaning, this collection contains 17 validated meaning tools for practitioners. Use them to help others choose directions for their lives in alignment with what is truly important to them.

self discovery essay examples

17 Tools To Encourage Meaningful, Value-Aligned Living

This 17 Meaning & Valued Living Exercises [PDF] pack contains our best exercises for helping others discover their purpose and live more fulfilling, value-aligned lives.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

Self-discovery is an ongoing process of stripping away that which is unimportant, reviewing our core values, and seeking to live in greater alignment with these inner truths.

Importantly, anyone can take steps toward greater self-knowledge. All that’s required is an attitude of curiosity and regular time out for meditation, reflection, or self-questioning.

We hope this article has left you feeling equipped for your journey of self-discovery, and if you decide to try out any of the tools or exercises we’ve explored, be sure to let us know in the comments.

We’d love to hear from you.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Meaning and Valued Living Exercises for free .

  • 21 Exercises. (2018).  The 365 self-discovery journal: One year of reflection & development.  Author.
  • Charles, J. P. (2010). Journaling: Creating space for “I”. Creative Nursing , 16 (4), 180–184.
  • Davenport, B. (2015).  Self-discovery questions: 155 Breakthrough questions to accelerate massive action.  Bold Living Press.
  • Elevate Life Project. (n.d.). Self discovery coaching . Retrieved October 11, 2021 from https://elevatelifeproject.com/self-discovery-coaching/
  • Hollis, B. (2019, July 16). Who am I? Journaling prompts for self-discovery and self-reflection. Learning to Be Free . Retrieved October 11, 2021 from https://www.learningtobefree.com/2019/07/16/journaling-prompts-for-self-discovery/
  • Horney, K. (1950). Neurosis and human growth: The struggle toward self-realization . Norton.
  • Pagedar, A. (2021). Finding awareness: The journey of self-discovery . Author.
  • Tolle, E. (2004).  The power of now: A guide to spiritual enlightenment.  New World Library.
  • Waterman, A. S. (2011). Eudaimonic identity theory: Identity as self-discovery. In S. Schwartz, K. Luyckx, & V. Vignoles (Eds.), Handbook of identity theory and research (pp. 357–379). Springer.
  • Waterman, A. S., Schwartz, S. J., Zamboanga, B. L., Ravert, R. D., Williams, M. K., Bede Agocha, V., … Brent Donnellan, M. (2010). The Questionnaire for Eudaimonic Well-Being: Psychometric properties, demographic comparisons, and evidence of validity. The Journal of Positive Psychology , 5 (1), 41–61.

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What our readers think.

Uchechukwu

This is a great article for self-discovery, I recommend it to all, it’s a must read for the young minds.

Adamsfaith

Thanks to a great counselor. I appreciate your encouragement and efforts that have served as an eyes opener to self discovery and other resources that is helpful.

Morning Upgrade

You have some great resources listed here in this article. Thanks for the great read! -Ryan

Koot van Nieuwholtz

Appreciated, Nicole, for insight well done to start kicking where need be. Keep up te good work!

Linda Berlach

Thanks Nicole. I will explore some of the resources which sounds great. I work with medical students, some of whom are at the very beginning of learning reflective approaches to enhance their self knowledge. The challenge is always to find a variety of ways to promote engagement. You have given me some helpful ideas.

James Fox

Thank You Dr, Nicole.

I have left you a message on LinkedIn.

Radha Ganesh

Thank you so much for this wonderful article. Very useful and helps in the journey of self awareness and so helpful to the therapist and counselors who are using these resources to support clients. Heartfelt thanks and gratitude for all the resources that benefit the clients and counselors who otherwise would not be able to access such great quality articles and resources. Thank you. As a counselor who is doing a lot of free counseling these resources and articles are so helpful, cause I cannot afford them otherwise. Thanks for supporting the counselors and therapist and clients who ultimately benefit.

Oliver Tian

Thanks, Nicole … you shared a very interesting set of perspective.

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College Essay: Discovering Myself

Claire Van De Weghe

I’ve always cared a little too much about things. To be able to make people smile, to make them laugh has always seemed like the right thing for me to do. As someone who has always wanted to do good in the world, I’ve struggled with the choice between taking care of myself and worrying about other people. I’ve come a long way, both regressing and progressing at different points, but throughout it all I’ve learned so many different lessons. At least in my story, I can candidly say that my experience and other people’s experiences are the best teachers of self-exploration.

In the third grade, my troubles with caring got big. Before, I was happy with the way I was, despite the occasional bout of loneliness. My sister was by my side and with the friends I had made it seemed almost impossible for the social self-consciousness to linger longer than a day or two. Day care was a little different. I loved the sweet snacks they served, most of which I had never tried before. I found myself a little more comfortable in the  company of the Spanish teacher, who was always excited to talk to students, or in the pottery class that happened in the evenings. Even so, I found myself on the outside. The few friends I had attended only part time, leaving me alone on the schooldays between Monday and Friday. Without my sister, everything was overwhelming. Unlike the daycare I had gone to before I moved, I had no real group of friends. Eventually, I decided I wouldn’t go.

My parents didn’t like that, of course. I remember them asking me so many times to “just give it a chance” or “remember that one girl you like there?” I refused to listen. I’ve always thought that my willfulness comes from the determination of both my parents, but whatever its source, it was strong enough even then to allow me to win that argument. The path it set me on, however, was one that I couldn’t go back from as soon as I started to learn its rules.

I was never bullied in school, despite all the doubts I’ve had about myself. The experiences that I went through were a bit more quiet. Because of my desperate want to be liked, I flitted between social groups, changing myself a little for each one. The more I did it, the easier it seemed to go deeper and deeper behind the facades. By sixth grade I had built up a nearly impenetrable floodgate to keep back everything that I was sure people would find strange or unappealing; the shallow person that I showed was free of everything the status quo would reject. As much as I’ve tried to break down those walls, it’s still one of the most difficult tasks I’m facing in my life.

Over the past years, I’ve tried to unearth who I really am. Between helping people, taking care of myself and finding joy in my life, the dust of my own doubts has obscured my vision. Thankfully, quarantine has given me more time to discover that. I’ve realized that more than anything, I want the strength to stand on my own, as an individual. Even when I’m faced with pressure or judgement, I want to be able to be myself authentically. Though I’m just starting now, I’ve had a lot of time to understand my own needs. If I’m able to show that to the world, I believe that I’ll truly find myself in the place I want to be.

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Uncovering My Values: A Journey to Self-Discovery

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  • Topic: Career Goals , Personal Growth and Development , Personal Life

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