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Understanding the Impact of Stress and Self-Care: Key Findings from the 2023 Safer Society Survey

By: David S. Prescott, Janet DiGiorgio-Miller, and Sarah Snow Haskell

The global events of the past few years have significantly impacted people’s lives. We’ve found ourselves figuring our way through the COVID-19 pandemic, increasing effects of climate change, political unrest, civil unrest related to racial and ethnic inequities, increases in food and housing insecurity, and cuts in funding for services to people in the criminal justice system. Now more than ever, it is essential that mental health professionals assess their own mental, emotional, and physical health to ensure the wellbeing of both themselves and their clients.

In the authors’ experience, professionals who work to understand, assess, and treat interpersonal (including sexual) violence can be highly creative and adaptive. Finding constructive ways to address the challenges that this work can present seems to come with the territory. It is not uncommon to hear practitioners talk about self-care strategies as simple as developing a sense of humor and not taking things personally to more deliberate activities, such as visiting with family, spending time in nature, and getting physical exercise. Still, doing this work in the current era is challenging. Participants in support groups and other discussions often talk about the lack of qualified professionals available, challenges with funding, and the “impostor syndrome” that can happen when one feels that workplace demands are outpacing their capacity to perform their duties.

Perhaps for the first time, professionals in the field have been facing many of the same existential concerns as their clients. The COVID-19 pandemic has been one such concern. In acknowledgment of the increased stresses experienced by practitioners in the mental health professions, last year the staff, management, and board of directors of Safer Society Foundation decided that the time had come for us to ask of those in the mental health field we serve, in essence, “How are you doing?”

This blog is a report on what we learned, first by reviewing the survey conducted by ATSA in 2021, then by conducting our own semi-scientific survey of the professionals who read our publications and attend our online trainings. Our survey collected the voices of professionals in the field at the period when the pandemic itself appeared to have ebbed, and yet many of its aftereffects continued to flow. We are grateful to those who contributed so that others will be able to consider how they are doing by comparison.

The April 2021 ATSA Survey

In April 2021, Dr. DiGiorgio-Miller conducted a survey through the listserv of the Association for the Treatment and Prevention of Sexual Abuse (ATSA). The survey involved 244 respondents, all of whom were ATSA members. The data from this survey highlights the significant impact of the pandemic on the mental and physical wellbeing of therapists, particularly among the 20- to 30-year-old age group. The survey findings align with CDC data, which reported an increase in anxiety and depressive disorder symptoms among young adults during the pandemic. The majority of participants felt more uncertain, fearful, and hopeless, with 90% of 20- to 30-year-olds experiencing feelings of isolation. This sense of disconnection was the most significant environmental factor across all age groups.

The physical effects of the pandemic were also evident, with weight changes, difficulty concentrating, and sleep issues reported by various age groups. The survey revealed a decrease in daily and weekly self-care activities and an increase in the number of months spent without any self-care. However, 61- to 70-year-olds engaged in self-care practices 50% of the time before the pandemic and 60% of the time after it began, suggesting that self-care practices may have a positive impact on professional longevity.

During this challenging time, therapists had to provide support to clients for the very issues that they were experiencing themselves, a practice that is typically contraindicated in therapists’ training. However, therapists were called upon to provide client support for not only the impact of the pandemic but also the issues contributing to and resulting from sexual abuse and aggression. The results of this survey emphasized the importance of addressing the mental and physical wellbeing of therapists during the pandemic. It became apparent to many more seasoned clinicians that we needed, first and foremost, to support the newcomers in the field, continue to check in on each other, and find solidarity with each other in the difficult work we do.

The April 2023 Safer Society Survey

In April 2023, David Prescott, Janet DiGiorgio-Miller, and Sarah Snow Haskell conducted a survey of 313 professionals who work in the field of sexual abuse to assess the continued impact the pandemic has had on them, particularly in the last six months. The results of this survey indicated a concerning amount of distress among therapists. The initial findings in the ATSA 2021 survey showed that more than half of the participants (N=244) reported a rise in general stress. Furthermore, the latest survey uncovered that 80% of the respondents experienced symptoms of burnout, indicating the pervasive nature of the issue among the therapists. Unfortunately, it appears that although the pandemic is technically over, stress continues to increase.

The Pandemic’s Lingering Impacts

Stress. In the April 2023 survey, 45% of participants experienced high or very high stress levels in the previous six months. The stress levels were consistent across most age groups, with only slight variations. For instance, 29% of 61-70-year-olds and 43% of those aged 51-60 experienced moderate to high stress levels. The majority of respondents were therapists, and the peak stress level of 48% was observed in those with 21 to 25 years of experience.

Regarding work location, stress levels vary significantly among different types of workers. Specifically, more than half (61%) of remote workers reported experiencing moderate levels of stress. This could be attributed to various factors, such as the blurring of work-life boundaries and the lack of social interaction that is inherent in remote work. On the other hand, 44% of those working in hybrid situations reported moderate stress levels. Hybrid collaboration can be challenging and can lead to communication difficulties and feelings of exclusion among remote participants, potentially contributing to increased stress levels.

In contrast, 41% of in-person workers experienced moderate stress. The lower stress levels among in-person workers could be due to the benefits of more social interaction and a structured workplace environment. However, it’s important to note that in-person work is not suitable for everyone due to various reasons such as health and family circumstances. Furthermore, it’s alarming to note that almost half (45%) of workers across all settings were experiencing high to very high levels of stress.

This data suggests that the pandemic’s impact on stress levels was widespread across different age groups, with experience and work location also playing a role in the stress levels reported by mental health professionals. While the data implies that work location does not significantly mitigate stress levels, it is crucial, especially for supervisors, to embrace more flexible work arrangements, foster supportive environments in the workplace, and provide resources for employees to help manage stress.

Emotional and Social Impact. Several conclusions are drawn from the data regarding the pandemic’s lingering impact on professionals, emotionally and socially. Across all age groups, a significant portion reported feeling more anxious, less socially connected, and more uncertain. Professionals in the 31 to 40 age group reported the highest levels among all three of these impacts. Those in the 20 to 30 age group reported the highest levels of feeling lonely and depressed. Interestingly, professionals in the 51 to 60 age group reported the opposite, feeling more socially connected, hopeful, and calmer.

This data on the emotional and social impacts on professionals reflects diverse responses, highlighting the need for tailored interventions for mental health professionals. The 2023 survey, like the ATSA survey conducted in 2021, indicates that newcomers in the field require support from more experienced clinicians as we seek solidarity with each other in this challenging work.

Consequences of the Pandemic’s Lingering Impacts. The repercussions of mental health professionals experiencing stress, anxiety, and uncertainty can be detrimental to both their personal wellbeing and the quality of care they provide to their clients. Some of the potential consequences include:

• Decreased therapeutic effectiveness: High levels of stress can impair a professional’s ability to provide effective therapy, as they may struggle to maintain focus, empathy, and emotional regulation during sessions.
• Secondary traumatic stress: Mental health professionals may experience secondary traumatic stress, which occurs when they are exposed to their clients’ traumatic experiences and begin to experience symptoms of trauma themselves.
• Compassion fatigue: Stress can contribute to compassion fatigue, a state of physical, emotional, and spiritual exhaustion that can result from prolonged exposure to clients’ suffering.
• Sleep disorders: Stress can lead to sleep disorders, such as insomnia, which can further contribute to the decline in mental and physical health.
• Increased risk of suicide: Stress and mental health concerns can increase the risk of suicide among healthcare workers, particularly when they feel unable to seek help due to stigma or concerns about confidentiality.

Self-Care Strategies

The prevalence of positive self-care practices, such as exercising, spending time outdoors, taking time off, and spending time with friends, family, and pets, was high across different age groups, with 62% of individuals aged 71 to 80 and 51% of those aged 20 to 30 engaging in self-care on a weekly basis. Furthermore, almost three-quarters (74%) of all age groups had a daily self-care practice. However, despite these positive coping practices, 80% of individuals still experienced a high to very high level of burnout.

Respondents were also asked what coping strategies they use that have the potential to be harmful. The prevalence of these strategies varies by age group:

• Binge watching increases with age until the 50s, then decreases.
• Increased eating and working longer hours are highest among those in their 40s and 50s, and lowest among those in their 60s and 70s.
• Increased alcohol use is highest among those in their 20s and 30s, and lowest among those in their 60s and 70s.
• Increased drug use is rare, with only a few respondents in their 30s and 50s reporting this behavior.

The findings suggest that while self-care practices are widespread, not all are equally beneficial for mental health and may not be fully effective in preventing burnout. This highlights the need for a deeper understanding of the relationship between self-care and burnout, especially in high-stress professions. Further research and tailored interventions may be necessary to address the high levels of burnout despite the prevalence of self-care practices.

Respondent Comments

The feedback gathered from the respondents encompassed a wide spectrum of emotions and experiences. Some expressed the profound impact of societal challenges on their mental wellbeing, citing difficulties in finding solace amidst human suffering and the strain of inadequate systemic support, which has been exacerbated by the pandemic. There were also accounts of negative effects on professional dynamics, such as increased negativity and compromised work quality. Additionally, individuals shared concerns about the effectiveness of virtual client interactions and the overall toll of the pandemic on their mental health.

On a more optimistic note, some participants expressed gratitude for the support received and highlighted the positive aspects of their personal and professional lives, including the value of relationships and the opportunity for professional development. This comprehensive range of responses reflects the complex and multifaceted nature of the experiences recounted in the survey.

What’s changed? The 2021 and 2023 surveys asked variations of the same basic questions, unearthing a striking continuity in the responses. The pandemic brought anxiety and social disconnection that has lasted for years. Notably, a significant 80% of the 2023 respondents reported experiencing burnout, underscoring the pervasive impact of the pandemic. This finding is in line with broader trends, as evidenced by various studies and surveys within and beyond the helping profession field, reflecting a concerning pattern of burnout across different professions and industries.

It is important to exercise caution in comparing the findings of 2021 and 2023. Neither has been peer-reviewed, and the context of the two surveys differed significantly. The 2021 survey reflects the full impact of the pandemic, while the 2023 survey took place amid a shifting landscape marked by the easing of the pandemic’s worst effects and the emergence of other stressors such as global conflicts, political tensions, and extreme weather events. This evolving backdrop underscores the need to interpret the findings within their respective temporal and contextual frameworks, recognizing the dynamic nature of the challenges faced by professionals in the field.

Clearly, professionals working with individuals who have abused others have experienced high levels of stress, and even the best self-care regimens are rarely enough to completely ameliorate the effects of this stress. It is also clear that the increased stresses and uncertainties of recent years, while changed, have not gone away. It is entirely possible that these results indicated a higher level of stress among the therapists who responded to these surveys compared with those in other studies because these therapists were working under the stresses of the pandemic in addition to their already stressful routine duties with clients who have sexually harmed.

Finally, this survey outlines potential areas for research, such as the fact that in some areas, respondents in their 30s showed less of an increase in some behaviors—such as increased alcohol use and working longer hours—than their older and younger counterparts. At the same time, the experience of stress and anxiety appeared attenuated for older respondents, leading to questions about how professionals may develop resilience with age.

Conclusions

It is concerning that 80% of professionals reported experiencing symptoms of burnout in the last six months, even with most engaging in self-care strategies. Addressing the mental health needs of mental health professionals is crucial to ensure they can provide effective care to their clients and maintain their own wellbeing.

The surveys shed light on the significant impact of the pandemic on the mental and physical wellbeing of therapists, particularly among the 20- to 30-year-old age group. The April 2021 ATSA survey, which involved 244 ATSA members, revealed a decrease in self-care activities and an increase in feelings of uncertainty, fear, and isolation, with the most significant environmental factor being a sense of disconnection. In 2023, the data from the Safer Society survey revealed that the emotional and social impacts on professionals varied, with those aged 31 to 40 experiencing the highest levels of anxiety, social disconnection, and uncertainty. In contrast, professionals aged 51 to 60 reported feeling more hopeful and socially connected, indicating a diverse range of responses.

Despite the prevalence of positive self-care practices, such as exercising and spending time with family, a high level of burnout was still reported, suggesting the need for a deeper understanding of the relationship between self-care and burnout. The feedback from respondents encompassed a wide range of emotions and experiences, reflecting the complex and multifaceted nature of their challenges and coping strategies.

One implication is that organizations and agencies may want to form communities in which professionals can discuss their stresses and self-care without fear of retribution and with the hope of having a positive impact on others as well as oneself. Not only do these findings indicate that we should encourage self-care with others (which is becoming enshrined in the codes of ethics of various professions), but professionals should also check in on one another to encourage a feeling of support and solidarity. Addressing the mental health needs of professionals working with clients who experience trauma and abuse is crucial to ensure they can provide effective care and maintain their own wellbeing.

While the survey does highlight some concerning trends, it also underscores the resilience of professionals in the field, many of whom have made self-care a priority. The integration of enjoyable self-care routines, such as exercise and contemplative practices, into their work lives has been a key strategy for many. Furthermore, the importance of open discussions about well-being cannot be overstated. By fostering an environment where everyone feels comfortable discussing their mental health concerns and self-care practices, we can collectively work towards a healthier future. The authors strongly recommend this approach, emphasizing the need for ongoing dialogue about well-being and future improvements.

Thank you for reading! A free downloadable PDF is available, which includes tables and graphs from the 2023 Safer Society survey.

Self-Care When You Need It Most – On Demand Training

Delve into current research, coping skills, and self-care techniques with survey author Janet DiGirgio-Miller, Ph.D., and co-presenter Arliss Kurtz, MSW, RSW, during this on-demand training hosted by Safer Society Foundation!

The workshop discusses evidence-based self-care techniques to reduce stress, enhance emotion regulation, and promote a sense of calm during distress. The training is designed for professionals in stressful environments and aims to promote daily self-care practices and strategies for both professionals and their clients. The topics covered include recent survey data on the pandemic’s effects, self-care skills, and the link between professional self-care and clients’ wellbeing.

After the training, participants should be better able to understand the pandemic’s impact, assess coping strategies, describe the benefits of mindfulness practices, and explain various self-care techniques.

• Key Resources
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• Free Slide Sets for Interested Users
• Research Opportunities

International Center For

Self care research, why is self care important.

People with chronic conditions must be actively involved in self-care.  Of 8,760 hours in a year, only about 10 hours or 0.001% are spent with healthcare professionals. All other health maintenance, monitoring and management activities are done by individuals and their families as self-care activities. P erforming self-care will improve well-being, decrease morbidity and mortality, and reduce healthcare costs.

Research has revealed the complexity of self-care. A wide variety of factors influence the decisions that people make about self-care. Significant knowledge gaps remain on how to influence those decisions in a manner that supports self-care. Our knowledge of the effects of self-care on outcomes is relatively undeveloped.

Our Mission

The vision of this Center is a world where self-care is prioritized by individuals, families, and communities and is the first line of approach in every health care encounter.

Current Challenges and Opportunities

Coordinate isolated activities.

Many people across the world are studying self-care and we anticipate that this research will continue. However, enthusiasm for self-care research is now so robust that it is becoming fragmented. Isolated research groups may waste time and effort in creating something that already exists. Repeating studies in specific countries or specific patient groups may waste energies that would be better used to contribute to an international and multicultural body of knowledge. 

Deepen Understanding

We need to deepen our theoretical understanding of the mechanisms underlying self-care behaviors. Without depth in understanding why, when, and how our interventions work, interventions may reflect guesswork. With a deeper understanding of barriers and facilitators of self-care we can develop and test promising interventions, improve our theoretical thinking, and formulate new hypotheses. Collaborating will deepen our understanding of self-care.

Promote Continuity

Currently researchers working worldwide are developing the field of self-care research. Their work may be temporarily funded but when funds run out, their work often ceases. This situation has resulted in a paucity of advanced projects answering the critical questions in the field. Possibilities to merge research resources in this Center can promote better continuity through a joint research agenda and  organizing of international studies.

We bring a unique perspective to existing self-care centers. Existing centers emphasize a medical model (i.e. disease focus) or a community perspective addressing the promotion of self-care behavior in regions and countries across the world. Our focus is theory-driven research.

Co-Directors of the Center are Professors Riegel and Jaarsma, experts recognized  worldwide  as leaders in the study of self-care. Individually and together they have published more than 200 articles on the topic of self-care.

Coordinating Council members are Professors Anna Stromberg (Sweden) and Ercole Vellone (Italy). Both have a deep understanding of theories of self-care and extensive research experience in self-care. 

Barbara Riegel

PhD, RN, FAAN

Anna Stromberg

Tiny jaarsma, ercole vellone.

PhD, RN, FESC

15 Most Interesting Self-Compassion Research Findings

Compassion is the ability we all have to show empathy, love, and concern to those who may be experiencing difficulties.

Self-compassion is all about extending that same compassion back toward yourself, which is not always easy to do. Extending that same level of compassion back toward yourself is not self-indulgent or selfish.

Developing a sense of self-compassion can help you in many areas of life, including mental health concerns such as anxiety or insecurity.

In this article, we will explore the most interesting research findings in self-compassion and how you can use them to live a better life.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Self-Compassion Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will not only help you increase the compassion and kindness you show yourself but will also give you the tools to help your clients, students, or employees show more compassion to themselves.

This Article Contains

The concept in psychology, a look at the theory, the research on self-compassion, 7 most interesting self-compassion research findings, self-compassion increases self-improvement motivation.

• Brene Brown’s Work on Self-Compassion

Christopher Germer on Self-Compassion

• Paul Gilbert’s Work on the Topic

The Work of Kristen Neff

Key self-compassion articles, journals on self-compassion, a take-home message.

Self-compassion , according to Kristin Neff, a self-compassion researcher, has three main elements:

• Self-kindness or having the ability to refrain from harsh criticism.
• The ability to recognize your own humanity or the fact that each of us is imperfect and each of us experiences pain.
• The ability to maintain a sense of mindfulness or non-biased awareness of experiences, even if they are painful.

Self-compassion is often intertwined with self-esteem, but they really are two distinct concepts. Self-compassion is more about self-acceptance and self-esteem focuses on favorable self-evaluation, especially for achievements, according to Neff.

Self-compassion is not dependent on social comparisons or personal success. It’s more about recognizing and accepting your flaws, which is a process that often leads to growth and personal development.

The theory of self-compassion is somewhat new in psychological literature. While self-compassion has been discussed for centuries in Eastern philosophy such as Buddhism, it only appeared in psychological literature around 2003, with research presented by Kristen Neff.

Two articles written by Neff described the construct of self-compassion providing a self-reported inventory for the measurement of individual differences in the tendency to be self-compassionate.

According to the research, self-compassion involves directing the same type of kindness, care, and compassion toward yourself that you would convey toward a loved one who was suffering.

Self-compassion also involves being open to and being moved by your own unique suffering while being caring and kind toward yourself. In order to do this, you must have a nonjudgmental attitude toward your inadequacies and failures, recognizing that your unique experiences are part of the common human experience.

The central aspect of self-compassion involves treating yourself kindly even when things go wrong.

For example, if you fail at something, you can still be kind to yourself. If you make a critical error you can still be self-compassionate and treat yourself with greater kindness.

Treating yourself kindly might involve:

• Taking time off to give yourself an emotional break.
• Engaging in mental acts of kindness such as positive self-talk.
• Giving yourself an encouraging word.
• Practicing forgiveness.

Self-compassion also involves taking on a more balanced perspective of your unique situation, according to Neff. Seeking a more balanced viewpoint allows you to not get so carried away with raw emotion.

When you face situations with self-compassion you tend to not dwell so much on the negativity. In other words, you don’t spend time wallowing. When you maintain a balanced perspective when faced with stress, you can approach the situation more mindfully.

Download 3 Free Self-Compassion Exercises (PDF)

These detailed, science-based exercises will equip you to help others create a kinder and more nurturing relationship with themselves.

Download 3 Free Self-Compassion Tools Pack (PDF)

By filling out your name and email address below.

Much of the research in self-compassion has been conducted utilizing the Self-Compassion Scale (SCS), which was designed to assess trait levels of self-compassion.

This scale was developed to evaluate thoughts, emotions and certain behaviors associated with different components of self-compassion.

The scale includes items such as measuring how often people respond to feelings of inadequacy or suffering. and also measures mindfulness, self-kindness, and self-judgment.

For example, someone who feels inadequate may judge themselves harshly when they are feeling emotional pain, instead of trying to be loving and kind.

Self-judgment may come into play when someone judges their own inadequacies and flaws harshly. Mindfulness also comes into play, by helping one take a more balanced viewpoint if something painful does occur.

The responses on the scale are given on a 5-point scale from almost never to almost always.

The short form self-compassion scale (SCS-SF) contains 12 items instead of 26 items and can be used for research purposes. The short scale has a near perfect correlation with the longer scale when examining total scores.

The scale measures items such as:

• Self-kindness
• Self-judgment
• Common humanity items
• Isolation items
• Mindfulness items
• Over-identified items

The scores are computed using the mean of subscale item responses.

Hermanto and Zuroff (2018) researched the social mentality theory of self-compassion and self-reassurance in terms of caregiving and care-seeking.

The aim of this study was to test social mentality theory which views self-compassion and reassurance as a form of intrapersonal relating, in which interpersonal mentalities of care-seeking and caregiving are activated.

The study, which was administered to 195 students, focused on self-reported measures of motivations, cognitions, and behaviors associated with seeking and receiving care from others. The study hypothesized that the combination of high care-seeking and high caregiving predicted the highest level of self-compassion and reassurance.

The lowest level of self-compassion and reassurance was predicted by the combination of low care-seeking and high caregiving consistent with the idea of compulsive caregiving.

While previous research has focused on the origin of self-compassion and reassurance coming from early influences and interpersonal experiences, the social mentality theory suggests that self-compassion and reassurance tend to operate through systems that were originally evolved for navigating social roles.

The findings of this study provide empirical support for the social mentality theory.

Robin Flanigan’s book “ The Kindness Cure ” (2017), points out that self-criticism does nothing more than make you feel stuck, especially if it is fueling an underlying sense of depression or anxiety. Replacing this kind of disapproval and self-judgment with self-compassion allows you to accept that you are flawed in a gentle way that helps to strengthen mental wellness.

Kristen Neff also talks about the idea that there is a societal misconception when it comes to self-kindness. In her research, she discusses the misconception that it is self-indulgent or narcissistic to practice self-kindness. It is Neff’s thoughts that this misconception needs to be changed.

In a study of counseling psychology graduate students, it was revealed that MBSR (Mindfulness-Based-Stress-Reduction) resulted in significant improvements in mindfulness, which then mediated changes in self-compassion following the intervention.

This study also referred to therapist self-acceptance as critically important, with the research findings showing that therapists who are the most critical of themselves are also the most hostile, controlling and critical of their patients. (Henry, Schacht, & Strupp, 1990). What this tells us is that practitioner self-acceptance is crucial when it comes to engaging with clients in a supportive and accepting manner.

Gordon Flett discusses self-compassion in the journal article Mattering and Positive Psychology . Flett begins with the idea that self-compassion and being able to self-soothe and maintain a positive self-dialogue is key when it comes to the element of positive adjustment.

A young person with a sense of mattering is someone who has a positive self-view that works to promote a sense of self-compassion when setbacks do occur. This helps one refrain from automatically engaging in self-blame and self-criticism.

Self-compassion research is also extending into the area of Sports Psychology . Researchers are accumulating support for self-compassion as a way for athletes to manage difficult emotional experiences in sports.

Women athletes with higher levels of self-compassion have greater levels of personal growth, body appreciation, purpose in life and a sense of responsibility and self-acceptance. It was also shown that these same women have lower levels of body-anxiety and fear of failure in addition to less fear of negative evaluation.

The research also showed that extending compassion toward yourself helps one to increase positivity and dwell less on hardships and obstacles.

One of the most interesting research findings involves self-compassion and neuroscience. In the journal article “ The Brain That Longs to Care for Itself: The Current Neuroscience of Self-Compassion (Stevens, Gauthier-Braham and Bush, 2018) researchers looked at the field of neuroscience and how more research on self-compassion could come into play.

Research on self-compassion could be expanded with methodologies like:

• fMRI neuroimaging
• EEG neuroimaging

These methodologies could be measured both before and after self-compassion workshop training according to the article.

EEG studies, for example, could be critical to the understandings of electrocortical changes that may occur during something such as directed meditation or contemplation. According to the article, self-processing in the brain is poorly understood at best and future research could be very beneficial.

Self-compassion also increases self-improvement motivation, according to Breines and Chen, (2012). In the study, the researchers examined the idea that self-compassion can increase self-improvement motivation.

In four trials, the authors examined the hypothesis that self-compassion can motivate one to improve things like:

• Personal weaknesses
• Moral transgressions
• Test performance

Those in a self-compassionate condition expressed a greater belief about a personal weakness compared to those in a self-esteem condition with no intervention or intervention that involved a positive distraction.

The four trials showed several things including:

• A higher motivation to make amends and a desire to not repeat transgressions.
• Greater desire to spend more time studying after an initial failure.
• Greater preference for upward social comparison after thinking about a personal weakness
• A greater sense of motivation to change that weakness.

These remarkable findings suggest that taking an accepting approach when it comes to personal failures may actually help people become more motivated for improvement.

Brene Brown’s Work on Self-Compassion

Brene Brown is a professor at the University of Houston. Brown has spent the past two decades researching and studying things like vulnerability and courage, as well as empathy and shame.

Brown is also the author of five #1 New York Times bestsellers:

• The Gifts of Imperfection,
• Daring Greatly,
• Rising Strong
• Braving the Wilderness.
• Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts.

Brown’s TED talk – The Power of Vulnerability – is widely viewed.

Brown studies the idea of human connection and our ability to empathize, belong and love. Brown also writes about shame and the idea that it corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change.

Brown’s research on shame and the impact of it is groundbreaking. She believes that we deepen our own humanity and sense of connectedness to each other when we are aware of the impact shame has on our lives.

Brown talks a lot about the idea that we are hardwired for “story” – down to the neurological and biological level. As humans, we desire connection and stories are that connection.

Her goal when writing is to tell the truth and walk away feeling proud of what she wrote. She often says she cannot control the outcome.

In addition, she also developed the Shame Resilience Theory , which talks about shame as a silent epidemic, and something each of us experiences. Shame is associated with depression, anxiety, grief, eating disorders and even addictions and violence.

The Shame Resilience Theory is a theory grounded in and based upon building resilience to shame by helping us connect with our authentic selves and grow meaningful relationships with others.

Lastly, Brown states that we are often our own worst critics. We talk to ourselves in ways that we would never speak to someone else. With self-compassion, we can learn to understand and calm our inner critic, which is key to living a brave life.

Germer is also a part-time lecturer on psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. Germer also partnered with Kristin Neff to co-create the Mindful Self-Compassion (MSC) program.

Dr. Germer’s main focus and interests are on self-compassion, which he refers to as “that warmhearted attitude of mindfulness when we suffer, fail, or feel inadequate.”

Germer came across the idea of self-compassion in 2005 as a solution for his long-term struggle with public speaking anxiety.

In addition to partnering with Neff on the workbook, he also established the Center for Mindfulness and Compassion at the Cambridge Health Alliance in 2015. Germer is on the faculty at Cambridge and serves as a senior advisor and consultant. Germer is also researching a protocol for using self-compassion to treat chronic pain.

Compassion, according to Germer, has to do with the desire to alleviate suffering in someone else, where self-compassion is basically the compassion you have toward yourself.

Self-compassion means treating yourself with the same understanding and kindness that you would treat someone you truly love. Germer also talks about the difference between mindfulness and self-compassion.

Mindfulness, according to Germer, is more about the moment-by-moment experience. Compassion, on the other hand, is more about that inner relationship we have with our sense of self.

Germer’s experience as a therapist recently taught him that it is just as important to offer self-compassion to yourself as it is to offer it to your clients. Germer also suggests that the development of self-compassion may very well be the invisible mechanism that helps determine whether therapy sticks and transforms a life or not.

Paul Gilbert’s Work on the Topic

Paul Gilbert is the founder of the Compassionate Mind Foundation . Gilbert is an internationally recognized researcher, speaker, and trainer. The Foundation supports global academic research and helps bring together leaders in the field.

The Compassionate Mind Foundation promotes wellbeing by facilitating scientific understanding and the application of compassion. It also utilizes compassion focused therapy literature as well as compassionate mind theory.

According to Gilbert’s work on compassion, the core of compassion is courage, rather than kindness. The courage to be compassionate lies in one’s willingness to see into the nature and the cause of suffering, whether that suffering is within oneself, or within others.

Gilbert believes that compassion is one of the most important declarations of strength and courage known to humanity. Compassion is difficult and powerful, while also being infectious and influential and is a universally recognized motivation that has the ability to change the world.

The guiding principle for the foundation is the idea that our human potential for love, altruism, creativity, and compassion and also for selfishness, cruelty, and vengeance are all tied together and linked to the way our brains have evolved over time in order to survive.

Modern research is just beginning to illuminate the genetic basis of all of these unique dispositions in terms of how they support social relationships, from the cradle to the grave.

These dispositions also shape our brains and value systems, and thus the disposition to create different patterns of activity in our brains.

The more we seek to understand these processes the more we can understand how different patterns in our minds are created.

Dr. Kristen Neff’s work is recognized all around the world.

Her work on self-compassion makes her an expert in the field. She was one of the very first researchers to define and measure self-compassion.

In addition to Dr. Neff’s work and research on self-compassion, she has also created a program to teach self-compassion to others. The workbook, the Mindful Self-Compassion (MSC) workbook and training was co-created by Dr. Neff and Dr. Chris Germer.

Dr. Neff’s work on self-compassion is groundbreaking. She believes that having compassion for yourself is really no different than having compassion for others.

Instead of continually judging and criticizing yourself for all of your inadequacies or shortcomings, self-compassion allows you to be kinder and gentler to yourself.

Having self-compassion, according to Dr. Neff, is not about trying to be perfect. It’s about being kind and understanding, even when faced with personal failings.

Self-compassion is not about self-judgment either, it’s about developing a sense of warmth and compassion in everything you do. When you are self-compassionate, you recognize your own failures and shortcomings as something that is inevitable and as something you can accept with love and kindness.

Self-compassion also allows you to see that all humans suffer. The very definition of being human means we are vulnerable, imperfect and mortal. Self-compassion comes into play when we are able to recognize this as a shared human experience.

Neff’s work also involves the idea of mindfulness, rather than over-identification. Mindfulness allows us to observe our negative thoughts and emotions with openness and clarity.

As we examine ourselves with an open and receptive mind, we create more internal balance.

What comes to mind when you think about “cultivating a self-compassionate inner voice”?

Many associate these words with selfishness, excessive optimism, self-pity, and passivity. In today’s modern world, where perfectionism is often the norm, being kind to oneself can feel unnatural and trigger negative beliefs. However, scientific research provides a different perspective on these misconceptions:

Selfishness:

Sugar coating:.

Dr. Neff has written many articles on self-compassion, including:

1. Why women need fierce self-compassion

Neff talks about how important it is for women to have fierce self-compassion in this article . According to Neff, women should embrace and integrate both tenderness and self-compassion in order to free themselves from patriarchy.

2. Embracing our common humanity with self-compassion

In this article , Neff talks about the idea of embracing our common humanity with self-compassion. The literal definition of compassion means to suffer within. This implies a basic mutuality in the suffering experience.

It’s important to remember that feelings of inadequacy and suffering are universal, and something that is a shared experience. The recognition of this shared experience helps us be more understanding and less judgmental when it comes to our inadequacies.

3. Self-appreciation: the flip side of self-compassion

Many people find it difficult to focus on their positive traits. The question is why? Praise and compliments should be something we are happy to receive, but many of us find accepting praise uncomfortable. In this article , Neff talks about how important it is to get to a place where we can celebrate our admirable qualities in a healthy way.

4. The physiology of self-compassion

The physiology of self-compassion focuses on research that shows that people who are self-compassionate are less likely to be depressed, anxious and stressed. As a result, they are more likely to be happy, resilient and optimistic about the future. In the end, those who are self-compassionate experience better mental health.

5. Why self-compassion beats self-confidence

According to the New York Times, self-compassion also beats self-confidence as seen in the article : Why Self-Compassion Beats Self-Confidence .

While we live in a world that reveres the idea of self-confidence and self-assuredness, the idea of self-compassion is a much better approach. Eric Barker, who wrote the book “ Barking Up the Wrong Tree ” talks about the idea that the culture of productivity we live in often encourages a fake sense of confidence without considering or looking at the drawbacks. Barker believes faking self-confidence may lead to overconfidence, which is the opposite of self-compassion.

According to Kristen Neff, many people think self-compassion is weak when it is really just the opposite.

One example of this is shown in a study written up in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, where subjects were videotaped while describing themselves.

The subjects were told they would be rated on things like likability, friendliness, and intelligence. Those with high levels of self-esteem often had emotional responses that were negative when it came to neutral or non-exceptional feedback. These same subjects also had a tendency to blame ratings that were unexceptional on factors outside themselves.

These studies suggest that self-compassion attenuates our reactions to negative events in ways that are more beneficial than self-esteem.

6. The transformative effects of mindful self-compassion

The article “ The Transformative Effects of Mindful Self-Compassion ” is another great article, written by Dr. Kristen Neff and Dr. Christopher Germer.

The authors talk about how self-kindness, recognition of our own humanity and mindfulness can give us the strength to thrive. Dr. Neff refers to her own personal experience with self-compassion when she talks about her son’s diagnosis of autism and how self-compassion helped her get through it. Being mindful of our own struggles can help us respond to ourselves with kindness and support.

17 Exercises To Foster Self-Acceptance and Compassion

Help your clients develop a kinder, more accepting relationship with themselves using these 17 Self-Compassion Exercises [PDF] that promote self-care and self-compassion.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

Try out these journals to expand your self-compassion knowledge.

1. The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook: A Proven Way to Accept Yourself, Build Inner Strength and Thrive

This science-based workbook offers a step-by-step approach to breaking free of self-criticism and self-judgment. The workbook also has meditations and practices that are simple and easy to do.

Dr. Neff encourages the use of a Self-Compassion Journal . A self-compassion journal is a great tool for expressing emotions and enhancing your physical and mental wellbeing.

Neff encourages people to make time for the practice of journaling. By journaling, you can take the time to record the day’s events as well as anytime you judged yourself harshly, felt bad about something or had a difficult experience.

Neff’s self-compassion journal includes 3 areas of awareness:

• Mindfulness
• Common Humanity
• Self-Kindness

By journaling about and examining these things, you can better reflect on why the idea of self-compassion is important for you.

2. My Self-Compassion Journal: Cultivating Love & Kindness for Myself

This journal, that is beautifully illustrated, is full of research inspired self-compassion exercises that can help you nurture a greater sense of self-compassion.

Allowing yourself to acknowledge the fact that you are human can help you on the path to a greater sense of well-being.

Available on Amazon .

3. Choose You: A Guided Self-Care Journal Made Just For You!

Another wonderful journaling tool, the author talks about the idea of self-care as an essential part of wellness.

This journal includes over 150 pages for guided journaling, including self-compassion tips , inspirational quotes , and questions you use for reflection.

Available from Amazon .

Self-compassion has much potential far beyond merely being kind to yourself. It has the ability to increase motivation, can help you face roadblocks and obstacles in a healthier way and help you embrace your common humanity.

Those with self-compassion are less likely to be critical of themselves and less likely to be depressed or anxious.

Self-compassion isn’t self-indulgent or narcissistic in any way, according to Neff, and it may very well be something that can heal the world and bring us a greater sense of peace within.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Self Compassion Exercises for free .

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• Mattering and Positive Psychology. (2018, June 08). Retrieved May 9, 2019, from https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/B9780128094150000074
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• Neff, K. D. (2011). Self‐compassion, self‐esteem, and well‐being. Social and personality psychology compass, 5(1) , 1-12.
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• Neff, K. D., Kirkpatrick, K. L., & Rude, S. S. (2007). Self-compassion and adaptive psychological functioning. Journal of Research in Personality, 41 , 139–154.
• Research. (n.d.). Retrieved May 9, 2019, from https://brenebrown.com/the-research/
• S. (2019). Dictionary of Sport Psychology. Academic Press. Retrieved May 9, 2019, from https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/B978012813150300019X
• Self-Compassion. (n.d.). Retrieved May 9, 2019, from https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/psychology/self-compassion
• Self-Compassion.org (n.d.). About Dr. Kristin Neff, Retrieved May 9, 2019, from https://self-compassion.org/about/
• Stevens, L., Gauthier-Braham, & M., Bush, B. (2018). The Brain That Longs to Care for Itself: The Current Neuroscience of Self-Compassion . Retrieved May 9, 2019, from https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/B9780128098370000040
• Wong, K. (2017). Why Self-Compassion Beats Self-Confidence . Retrieved May 9, 2019, from https://www.nytimes.com/2017/12/28/smarter-living/why-self-compassion-beats-self-confidence.html

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Mental health includes emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It is more than the absence of a mental illness—it’s essential to your overall health and quality of life. Self-care can play a role in maintaining your mental health and help support your treatment and recovery if you have a mental illness.

How can I take care of my mental health?

Self-care means taking the time to do things that help you live well and improve both your physical health and mental health. This can help you manage stress, lower your risk of illness, and increase your energy. Even small acts of self-care in your daily life can have a big impact.

Here are some self-care tips:

• Get regular exercise.  Just 30 minutes of walking every day can boost your mood and improve your health. Small amounts of exercise add up, so don’t be discouraged if you can’t do 30 minutes at one time.
• Eat healthy, regular meals and stay hydrated.  A balanced diet and plenty of water can improve your energy and focus throughout the day. Pay attention to your intake of caffeine and alcohol and how they affect your mood and well-being—for some, decreasing caffeine and alcohol consumption can be helpful.
• Make sleep a priority . Stick to a schedule, and make sure you’re getting enough sleep. Blue light from devices and screens can make it harder to fall asleep, so reduce blue light exposure from your phone or computer before bedtime.
• Try a relaxing activity.  Explore relaxation or wellness programs or apps, which may incorporate meditation, muscle relaxation, or breathing exercises. Schedule regular times for these and other healthy activities you enjoy, such as listening to music, reading, spending time in nature, and engaging in low-stress hobbies.
• Set goals and priorities.  Decide what must get done now and what can wait. Learn to say “no” to new tasks if you start to feel like you’re taking on too much. Try to appreciate what you have accomplished at the end of the day.
• Practice gratitude.  Remind yourself daily of things you are grateful for. Be specific. Write them down or replay them in your mind.
• Focus on positivity . Identify and challenge your negative and unhelpful thoughts.
• Stay connected.  Reach out to friends or family members who can provide emotional support and practical help.

Self-care looks different for everyone, and it is important to find what you need and enjoy. It may take trial and error to discover what works best for you.

Learn more about  healthy practices for your mind and body  .

When should I seek professional help?

Seek professional help if you are experiencing severe or distressing symptoms that have lasted 2 weeks or more, such as:

• Difficulty sleeping
• Changes in appetite or unplanned weight changes
• Difficulty getting out of bed in the morning because of mood
• Difficulty concentrating
• Loss of interest in things you usually find enjoyable
• Inability to complete usual tasks and activities
• Feelings of irritability, frustration, or restlessness

How can I find help?

If you have concerns about your mental health, talk to a primary care provider. They can refer you to a qualified mental health professional, such as a psychologist, psychiatrist, or clinical social worker, who can help you figure out the next steps. Find  tips for talking with a health care provider about your mental health.

You can learn more about getting help on the NIMH website. You can also learn about finding support  and locating mental health services  in your area on the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website.

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Suicide is preventable—learn about warning signs of suicide and action steps for helping someone in emotional distress.

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Self-care research: Where are we now? Where are we going?

Affiliations.

• 1 School of Nursing, University of Pennsylvania, 418 Curie Boulevard, Philadelphia, PA 19104-4217, USA; Mary McKillop Institute for Health Research, Australian Catholic University, Melbourne, Australia. Electronic address: [email protected].
• 2 School of Nursing, Emory University, USA. Electronic address: [email protected].
• 3 Queen's University Belfast, Northern Ireland, UK. Electronic address: [email protected].
• 4 Department of Psychiatry, Washington University School of Medicine, USA. Electronic address: [email protected].
• 5 School of Nursing, Boston College, USA. Electronic address: [email protected].
• 6 Nursing Research Institute, St Vincent's Health Australia & Australian Catholic University, Australia. Electronic address: [email protected].
• 7 Department of Medical and Health Sciences and Department of Cardiology, Linkoping University, Sweden. Electronic address: [email protected].
• 8 University of Rome "Tor Vergata", Italy. Electronic address: [email protected].
• 9 International Self-Care Foundation, UK. Electronic address: [email protected].
• 10 Julius Center, University Medical Center Utrecht, the Netherlands; Faculty of Medical and Health Sciences, Linkoping University, Sweden. Electronic address: [email protected].
• PMID: 31630807
• PMCID: PMC7035984
• DOI: 10.1016/j.ijnurstu.2019.103402

Background and objective: The beneficial effects of self-care include improved well-being and lower morbidity, mortality, and healthcare costs. In this article we address the current state of self-care research and propose an agenda for future research based on the inaugural conference of the International Center for Self-Care Research held in Rome, Italy in June 2019. The vision of this Center is a world where self-care is prioritized by individuals, families, and communities and is the first line of approach in every health care encounter. The mission of the Center is to lead the self-care research endeavor, improving conceptual clarity and promoting interdisciplinary work informed by a shared vision addressing knowledge gaps. A focused research agenda can deepen our theoretical understanding of self-care and the mechanisms underlying self-care, which can contribute to the development of effective interventions that improve outcomes.

Methods: During conference discussions, we identified seven major reasons why self-care is challenging, which can be grouped into the general categories of behavior change and illness related factors. We identified six specific knowledge gaps that, if addressed, may help to address these challenges: the influence of habit formation on behavior change, resilience in the face of stressful life events that interfere with self-care, the influence of culture on self-care behavioral choices, the difficulty performing self-care with multiple chronic conditions, self-care in persons with severe mental illness, and the influence of others (care partners, family, peer supporters, and healthcare professionals) on self-care.

Plans to achieve results: To achieve the vision and mission of the Center, we will lead a collaborative program of research that addresses self-care knowledge gaps and improves outcomes, create a supportive international network for knowledge transfer and support of innovations in self-care research, and support and train others in self-care research. Beyond these specific short-term goals, important policy implications of this work are discussed.

Keywords: Behavior change; Caregivers; Choice behavior; Goals; Habits; Health care costs; Mental illness; Multiple chronic conditions; Self-care; Social support.

Copyright © 2019. Published by Elsevier Ltd.

• Health Personnel
• Mental Disorders*

Grants and funding

• R01 NR018196/NR/NINR NIH HHS/United States

What Is Self-Care, and Why Is It So Important for Your Health?

Let’s clear up one common misconception from the get-go: Self-care is not synonymous with self-indulgence or being selfish. Self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can be healthy, you can be well, you can do your job, you can help and care for others, and you can do all the things you need to and want to accomplish in a day.

Paula Gill Lopez, PhD , an associate professor in the department of psychological and educational consultation at Fairfield University in Fairfield, Connecticut, says the need for self-care is obvious. “We have an epidemic of anxiety and depression,” she says. “Everybody feels it.”

Self-care is part of the answer to how we can all better cope with daily stressors, explains Kelsey Patel , a Los Angeles-based wellness expert . It’s work stress. It’s the stress of trying to keep up with the pace of daily life, which technology has hastened more than ever (just think how many emails come flooding into your inbox each day). “People are feeling lonelier and less able to unwind and slow down, which makes them feel more anxious and overwhelmed by even the simplest tasks,” Patel says.

RELATED: A Guide to Understanding Stress — Including How to Manage It

At Everyday Health, self-care is taking steps to tend to your physical and emotional health needs to the best of your ability.

Here, we explore the trend, where the definition of self-care comes from, and what it can do for your long-term health.

What Is Self-Care, and Why Is It Critical for Your Well-Being?

According to this definition, self-care includes everything related to staying physically healthy — including hygiene, nutrition, and seeking medical care when needed. It’s all the steps an individual can take to manage stressors in his or her life and take care of his or her own health and well-being.

RELATED: Wellness and Self-Care During Radical Movements

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Common questions & answers.

Self-care is anything you do to take care of yourself so you can stay physically, mentally, and emotionally well. Its benefits are better physical, mental, and emotional health and well-being. Research suggests self-care promotes positive health outcomes, such as fostering resilience, living longer, and becoming better equipped to manage stress.

Common examples of self-care include: maintaining a regular sleeping routine, eating healthy, spending time in nature, doing a hobby you enjoy, and expressing gratitude. Self-care can look different for everyone, but to count as self-care, the behavior should promote health and happiness for you.

To get into a routine of regularly practicing self-care, experts recommend starting small rather than tackling the most challenging thing first. Choose one practice each week to weave into your daily routine. Note any positive changes, and add in more practices when you feel ready.

As self-care has become more mainstream, the definitions have started to become more about general wellbeing and tend to focus on tuning in to one’s needs and meeting those needs. “Self-care is anything that you do for yourself that feels nourishing,” says Marni Amsellem, PhD , a licensed psychologist based in the greater New York metropolitan area.

“That can be something that’s relaxing or calming, or it can be something that is intellectual or spiritual or physical or practical or something you need to get done,” she says.

Self-care requires checking in with yourself and asking yourself how you’re doing physically, mentally, and emotionally. Some people use it to deal with difficult news stories, while others practice self-care just to maintain their happiness day to day . Self-care does not mean the same thing for everyone. Different people will adopt different self-care practices, and even your own definition might change over time. “What is self-care for one person will likely differ from someone else, and what’s self-care for you one day might not feel like self-care another day,” Dr. Amsellem says.

Engaging in self-care regularly could help you put your best foot forward. “When we are regularly taking care of ourselves, we are better able to react to the things that go on in our lives,” Amsellem says. “It’s something we do to maintain positive well-being.”

RELATED:  9 Essential Skills That Will Make You More Resilient

Types of Self-Care

“It could be anything that floats your boat — anything that puts a smile on your face,” Dr. Gill Lopez says. “Anything that makes you feel cared for, even if it’s you caring for yourself.”

There are a few different categories of self-care:

• Emotional self-care , such as self-talk , weekly bubble baths, saying “no” to things that cause unnecessary stress, giving yourself permission to take a pause, or setting up a weekly coffee date with a friend
• Physical self-care , such as prioritizing sleep, adopting an exercise routine you can stick with, or choosing healthy and nourishing foods over highly processed ones
• Spiritual self-care , such as attending a religious service, spending time in nature, meditating , incorporating regular acts of kindness into your day, or keeping a gratitude journal

Additionally, Gill Lopez puts self-care into two further categories: temporary and enduring.

What Counts as Self-Care, and What Doesn’t

There’s no way to say exactly what counts as self-care because everyone’s definition is their own and unique.

The underlying rule is that it’s something that brings you sustained joy in the long run, Courtney says. And though there are plenty of examples of self-care that seem to tread a fine line between a health-enhancing behavior and self-indulgence, self-care doesn’t have to be about padding your calendar with luxurious experiences or activities that cost money (though it certainly can).

RELATED: Is Social Media Busting or Boosting Your Stress?

Consider a manicure or a massage or any other pampering activity. It might seem indulgent, but if the activity helps you de-stress and carve out time for yourself, it counts as self-care, Amsellem says. If weekly manicures or monthly spa days are beyond your means, they will likely add stress to your life in the long run, so there are plenty of other self-care practices you can adopt.

“Self-care does not have to cost anything — it’s just doing things you enjoy. And a lot of the things we enjoy or feel fulfilled from cost nothing,” Amsellem says. “Stepping outside and taking a deep breath, for example, might be the greatest act of self-care.”

Even if you can’t spend lots of time and money, Gill Lopez says you can still practice self-care several times a week by turning things you do every day into self-care practices.

Maybe you try being more mindful of your thoughts on your commute, or maybe you find ways to make daily tasks, like showering, more enjoyable. Pick a soap with a scent that you love, and focus on the physical sensations of the shower. Gill Lopez says: What does your shower smell like? What does it sound like? How does the warm water feel on your skin? “For about 10 minutes in the shower, which I have to do anyway, instead of letting my monkey brain run wild, I’m right there,” she says.

Daily chores like making your bed in the morning are also examples of self-care — or can be. “This is where that individuality comes into play, because for some people there is no way making a bed feels like self-care — it may just feel like a chore,” Amsellem says. But if it helps you claim your day and gives you a sense of accomplishment early on, you’ll have that with you even if the rest of the day gets derailed, Amsellem says.

The simple act of making your bed in the morning likely isn’t sufficient to account for all your self-care, she says. You may need to routinely devote time and energy to other self-care practices, she adds. “But if there are some days when you feel out of control, on those days, starting the day off doing what you wanted to do for yourself might be one of the biggest forms of self-care you engage in that day.”

And sometimes when all of our other self-care plans get thrown out of whack (you worked through your yoga class, your friend canceled your coffee date — we’ve all been there), it’s those small practices of self-care that provide just enough calm to help us get through the day and wake up in a better mood tomorrow.

RELATED: 20 Tips to Help You Build Resilience and Better Cope

The Effects: How Self-Care Benefits Your Health and Well-Being

Many common self-care practices have been linked to longevity and other positive health outcomes, says  Ellen K. Baker, PhD , a psychologist based in Washington, DC. There’s a lot of research, for example, showing that things like exercise, yoga, and mindfulness are supportive of mental and physical health, she says.

The following self-care practices have been well-researched and linked to a longer life:

The clinical evidence documenting the long-term health benefits of specifically taking a self-care approach to health (over other approaches) is less robust, but it is building.

How to Start a Self-Care Routine

To get started with a self-care routine:

• Determine which activities bring you joy, replenish your energy, and restore your balance.
• Start small by choosing one behavior you’d like to incorporate into your routine in the next week.
• Build up to practicing that behavior every day for one week.
• Reflect on how you feel.
• Add more practices when ready.
• Get support through sharing practices from loved ones, a coach, a licensed professional (like a therapist or dietitian), or through your healthcare plan, community, or workplace.

Practicing self-care doesn’t need to be a heavy lift right out of the gate. Here are a few ideas to ease you into your self-care journey:

• Start each day by paying attention to your breath for five minutes and setting intentions for the day.
• Eat breakfast.
• Reflect on what you’re grateful for each night.
• Put your phone on airplane mode for a half hour before bed each night to release yourself from the flurry of notifications.
• Call a friend just to say hello.
• Take up a relaxing hobby.
• Pick a bedtime, and stick to it.

Note: If you read this and feel a sense of demoralization or sadness from the challenges of mounting or establishing a self-care practice, it’s best to get help and support. There may be barriers to caring for yourself from past trauma, mental health issues, or family situations that may be making it more challenging to get started. Seek support from trusted counselors and behavioral health providers (like a therapist), a trusted primary care doctor, or a close friend.

The bottom line: Self-care can have a positive effect on your health and outlook, but it requires a commitment or intention to invest in your well-being.

Learn More About How to Start a Self-Care Routine

Editorial Sources and Fact-Checking

Everyday Health follows strict sourcing guidelines to ensure the accuracy of its content, outlined in our editorial policy . We use only trustworthy sources, including peer-reviewed studies, board-certified medical experts, patients with lived experience, and information from top institutions.

• Self-Care. Google Trends.
• Self-Care Interventions for Health. World Health Organization.
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• Relationship of Sleep Duration With All-Cause Mortality and Cardiovascular Events: A Systematic Review and Dose-Response Meta-Analysis of Prospective Cohort Studies. Journal of the American Heart Association.
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• Holzel BK, Carmody J, Vangel M, et al. Mindfulness Practice Leads to Increases in Regional Brain Gray Matter Density. Psychiatry Research: Neuroimaging . January 30, 2011.
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• Clinical Diabetes
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Self-Care in Diabetes

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Diabetes has become a serious clinical and public health problem around the globe. By the most recent estimates, around 415 million people worldwide have been diagnosed with diabetes mellitus (DM), and the number is expected to increase to 642 million by 2040, making it one of the leading non communicable ...

Keywords : Diabetes, self-care, self-management, medication adherence, disease knowledge

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4 Great Ways to Boost Your Self-Care and Well-Being

How to water the flowers, not the weeds, in the garden of your life..

Posted May 6, 2024 | Reviewed by Jessica Schrader

• Find a therapist near me
• Nobody can do our self-care for us.
• In each moment of our lives, we can choose how we see ourselves and the world around us.
• Rather than labeling ourselves "good" or "bad," we can learn to accept ourselves with greater self-compassion.

There’s what we want. And then there’s what is.

Life is filled with beautiful flowers. And then there are the weeds. And nobody can protect us from the weeds, dry soil, and rocky ground in the gardens of our lives. There’s no fence tall enough to keep out unwanted intrusions, emotions, and experiences.

How do we deal with the weeds? What strategies can help us notice the beauty, colors, and fragrances of the flowers and trees? How might we deal with the weeds when we first notice them, before they get too big and potentially destructive?

Of course, putting the metaphors aside, here’s the big question: How do we learn to take care of the gardens of our own day-to-day lives? Sooner or later we learn, sometimes the hard way, that nobody can do our self-care for us:

• Our lives are our gardens and we’re more vulnerable than we’d like to be.
• We need enough water, sunlight, and good soil to thrive.
• We need to take care of ourselves and can’t depend on others to do our self-care for us.
• We need to water the flowers, not the weeds.

Yes, there’s what you want and what is. Yet in each moment, you can choose how you see yourself and the world around you (Miller, 2021). And although others can support and cheer you on, it’s on you to care for your own garden.

What do you need for self-care? There are many pathways to self-care and thriving. Here are a few:

1. Connecting With Your Values. Your values are like your inner compass, letting you know what’s truly important to you, inviting you toward where you want to focus your energies, and offering a source of insight and motivation .

It’s so easy to get lost in the day-to-day, misplacing what really matters to you in the big picture of your existence. Losing touch with your values can be like watering the weeds and can cause many kinds of suffering. Conversely, making choices based on your values offers greater meaning and direction. The values you choose to live by are up to you. What do you truly value?

2. Awakening and Practicing Self-Compassion. According to psychologist Kristen Neff, Ph.D., self-compassion involves seeing your own life in the light of common human experience. Rather than labeling yourself as "good" or "bad," you can learn to accept yourself with a more open heart (2011). This shift in perspective can be life-changing. How would it be if you offered yourself the same kindness and caring that you would share with a good friend or loved one?

Neff writes that typically there’s almost no person who we treat as badly as we treat ourselves. Yet, there are many pathways to increase self-compassion, offering yourself the tenderness and kindness you need.

One place to begin is to gently offer yourself care, with kind words and a reassuring tone of voice (Neff, 2021, 2011; Salzburg, 2010). For example: “It’s OK honey, you’re OK.” When something disturbs you, you can try to be more patient with yourself. Neff recommends writing to yourself regularly with kind, comforting words. You might write in a journal or record your kind thoughts on an electronic device.

3. Enjoying Experiences That Bring You Pleasure. There’s no formula for what different people enjoy, but this brief list offers a few examples:

Go outside in nature. Play games. Watch a movie or a concert. Nurture your garden, in a window or outdoors. Walk with a friend or your dog. Enjoy the sun shining in through a window. Hang out with a loved one, friend, or acquaintance you enjoy. Call someone you care about. Volunteer. Create art, music, or a craft. Write a poem or story just for fun. Cook something you enjoy. Do a random act of kindness.

4. Putting Things Into Perspective With Gratitude . Whether the day is going well or poorly, it can be helpful to remind yourself of what you are thankful for. Even when times are tough, pausing to notice a small positive moment, experience, or event can offer you greater perspective.

What do you need for self-care in the garden of your life? How can you take a step toward watering the flowers, not the weeds?

Disclaimer: This post is for informational purposes only. No content is a substitute for consulting with a qualified mental health or healthcare professional.

© 2024 Ilene Berns-Zare, LLC. All rights reserved.

Miller, L. (2021). The awakened brain: The new science of spirituality and our quest for an inspired life . New York, NY: Random House.

Neff, K., (2021). Fierce self-compassion: How women can harness kindness to speak up, claim their power, and thrive. New York, NY: HarperCollins.

Neff, K. (2011 ). Self-compassion: The proven power of being kind to yourself . New York, NY: William Morrow.

Salzberg, S. (2010). The force of kindness: Change your life with love & compassion . Boulder, CO: Sounds True.

Ilene Berns-Zare, PsyD, is a life and leadership coach. She writes about navigating personal and professional life with resilience, meaning, mindfulness, and well-being.

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