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15 Tips for Writing a College Essay About Yourself

What’s covered:.

• What is the Purpose of the College Essay?
• How to Stand Out Without Showing Off
• 15 Tips for Writing an Essay About Yourself
• Where to Get Free Feedback on Your Essay

Most students who apply to top-tier colleges have exceptional grades, standardized test scores, and extracurricular activities. How do admissions officers decide which applicants to choose among all these stellar students? One way is on the strength of their college essay .

This personal statement, along with other qualitative factors like teacher recommendations, helps the admissions committee see who you really are—the person behind the transcript. So, it’s obviously important to write a great one.

What Is the Purpose of the College Essay? 

Your college essay helps you stand out in a pool of qualified candidates. If effective, it will also show the admissions committee more of your personality and allow them to get a sense of how you’ll fit in with and contribute to the student body and institution. Additionally, it will show the school that you can express yourself persuasively and clearly in writing, which is an important part of most careers, no matter where you end up. 

Typically, students must submit a personal statement (usually the Common App essay ) along with school-specific supplements. Some students are surprised to learn that essays typically count for around 25% of your entire application at the top 250 schools. That’s an enormous chunk, especially considering that, unlike your transcript and extracurriculars, it isn’t an assessment of your entire high school career.  

The purpose of the college essay is to paint a complete picture of yourself, showing admissions committees the person behind the grades and test scores. A strong college essay shows your unique experiences, personality, perspective, interests, and values—ultimately, what makes you unique. After all, people attend college, not their grades or test scores. The college essay also provides students with a considerable amount of agency in their application, empowering them to share their own stories.

How to Stand Out Without Showing Off 

It’s important to strike a balance between exploring your achievements and demonstrating humility. Your aim should be to focus on the meaning behind the experience and how it changed your outlook, not the accomplishment itself. 

Confidence without cockiness is the key here. Don’t simply catalog your achievements, there are other areas on your application to share them. Rather, mention your achievements when they’re critical to the story you’re telling. It’s helpful to think of achievements as compliments, not highlights, of your college essay.  

Take this essay excerpt , for example:

My parents’ separation allowed me the space to explore my own strengths and interests as each of them became individually busier. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents. Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think my parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go. 

Instead of saying “ I received this scholarship and participated in this prestigious program, ” the author tells a story, demonstrating their growth and initiative through specific actions (riding the train alone, applying academic programs on her own, etc.)—effectively showing rather than telling.

15 Tips for Writing an Essay About Yourself 

1. start early .

Leave yourself plenty of time to write your college essay—it’s stressful enough to compose a compelling essay without putting yourself under a deadline. Starting early on your essay also leaves you time to edit and refine your work, have others read your work (for example, your parents or a teacher), and carefully proofread.

2. Choose a topic that’s meaningful to you 

The foundation of a great essay is selecting a topic that has real meaning for you. If you’re passionate about the subject, the reader will feel it. Alternatively, choosing a topic you think the admissions committee is looking for, but isn’t all that important to you, won’t make for a compelling essay; it will be obvious that you’re not very invested in it.

3. Show your personality 

One of the main points of your college essay is to convey your personality. Admissions officers will see your transcript and read about the awards you’ve won, but the essay will help them get to know you as a person. Make sure your personality is evident in each part—if you are a jokester, incorporate some humor. Your friends should be able to pick your essay from an anonymous pile, read it, and recognize it as yours. In that same vein, someone who doesn’t know you at all should feel like they understand your personality after reading your essay. 

4. Write in your own voice 

In order to bring authenticity to your essay, you’ll need to write in your own voice. Don’t be overly formal (but don’t be too casual, either). Remember: you want the reader to get to know the real you, not a version of you that comes across as overly stiff or stilted. You should feel free to use contractions, incorporate dialogue, and employ vocabulary that comes naturally to you. 

5. Use specific examples 

Real, concrete stories and examples will help your essay come to life. They’ll add color to your narrative and make it more compelling for the reader. The goal, after all, is to engage your audience—the admissions committee. 

For example, instead of stating that you care about animals, you should tell us a story about how you took care of an injured stray cat. 

Consider this side-by-side comparison:

Example 1: I care deeply about animals and even once rescued a stray cat. The cat had an injured leg, and I helped nurse it back to health.

Example 2: I lost many nights of sleep trying to nurse the stray cat back to health. Its leg infection was extremely painful, and it meowed in distress up until the wee hours of the morning. I didn’t mind it though; what mattered was that the cat regained its strength. So, I stayed awake to administer its medicine and soothe it with loving ear rubs.

The second example helps us visualize this situation and is more illustrative of the writer’s personality. Because she stayed awake to care for the cat, we can infer that she is a compassionate person who cares about animals. We don’t get the same depth with the first example. 

6. Don’t be afraid to show off… 

You should always put your best foot forward—the whole point of your essay is to market yourself to colleges. This isn’t the time to be shy about your accomplishments, skills, or qualities. 

7. …While also maintaining humility 

But don’t brag. Demonstrate humility when discussing your achievements. In the example above, for instance, the author discusses her accomplishments while noting that her parents thought of her as immature. This is a great way to show humility while still highlighting that she was able to prove her parents wrong.

8. Be vulnerable 

Vulnerability goes hand in hand with humility and authenticity. Don’t shy away from exploring how your experience affected you and the feelings you experienced. This, too, will help your story come to life. 

Here’s an excerpt from a Common App essay that demonstrates vulnerability and allows us to connect with the writer:  

“You ruined my life!” After months of quiet anger, my brother finally confronted me. To my shame, I had been appallingly ignorant of his pain. 

Despite being twins, Max and I are profoundly different. Having intellectual interests from a young age that, well, interested very few of my peers, I often felt out of step in comparison with my highly-social brother. Everything appeared to come effortlessly for Max and, while we share an extremely tight bond, his frequent time away with friends left me feeling more and more alone as we grew older.

In this essay, the writer isn’t afraid to share his insecurities and feelings with us. He states that he had been “ appallingly ignorant ” of his brother’s pain, that he “ often felt out of step ” compared to his brother, and that he had felt “ more and more alone ” over time. These are all emotions that you may not necessarily share with someone you just met, but it’s exactly this vulnerability that makes the essay more raw and relatable. 

9. Don’t lie or hyperbolize 

This essay is about the authentic you. Lying or hyperbolizing to make yourself sound better will not only make your essay—and entire application—less genuine, but it will also weaken it. More than likely, it will be obvious that you’re exaggerating. Plus, if colleges later find out that you haven’t been truthful in any part of your application, it’s grounds for revoking your acceptance or even expulsion if you’ve already matriculated. 

10. Avoid cliches 

How the COVID-19 pandemic changed your life. A sports victory as a metaphor for your journey. How a pet death altered your entire outlook. Admissions officers have seen more essays on these topics than they can possibly count. Unless you have a truly unique angle, then it’s in your best interest to avoid them. Learn which topics are cliche and how to fix them . 

11. Proofread 

This is a critical step. Even a small error can break your essay, however amazing it is otherwise. Make sure you read it over carefully, and get another set of eyes (or two or three other sets of eyes), just in case.

12. Abstain from using AI

There are a handful of good reasons to avoid using artificial intelligence (AI) to write your college essay. Most importantly, it’s dishonest and likely to be not very good; AI-generated essays are generally formulaic, generic, and boring—everything you’re trying to avoid being.   The purpose of the college essay is to share what makes you unique and highlight your personal experiences and perspectives, something that AI can’t capture.

13. Use parents as advisors, not editors

The voice of an adult is different from that of a high schooler and admissions committees are experts at spotting the writing of parents. Parents can play a valuable role in creating your college essay—advising, proofreading, and providing encouragement during those stressful moments. However, they should not write or edit your college essay with their words.

14. Have a hook

Admissions committees have a lot of essays to read and getting their attention is essential for standing out among a crowded field of applicants. A great hook captures your reader’s imagination and encourages them to keep reading your essay. Start strong, first impressions are everything!

15. Give them something to remember

The ending of your college essay is just as important as the beginning. Give your reader something to remember by composing an engaging and punchy paragraph or line—called a kicker in journalism—that ties everything you’ve written above together.

Where to Get Free Feedback on Your College Essay 

Before you send off your application, make sure you get feedback from a trusted source on your essay. CollegeVine’s free peer essay review will give you the support you need to ensure you’ve effectively presented your personality and accomplishments. Our expert essay review pairs you with an advisor to help you refine your writing, submit your best work, and boost your chances of getting into your dream school. Find the right advisor for you and get started on honing a winning essay.

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How to Write an Essay About Yourself

Gabriel Jimenez-Ekman is a content editor and writer at Scholarships360. He has managed communications and written content for a diverse array of organizations, including a farmer’s market, a concert venue, a student farm, an environmental NGO, and a PR agency. Gabriel graduated from Kenyon College with a degree in sociology.

Learn about our editorial policies

Bill Jack has over a decade of experience in college admissions and financial aid. Since 2008, he has worked at Colby College, Wesleyan University, University of Maine at Farmington, and Bates College.

Writing an essay about yourself is no easy feat — although you may know yourself better than anyone, it can be tough to get the perspective needed to write about yourself in essay form. Despite its challenges, writing essays about yourself is one of the most crucial skills in the college application process, and we have some key tricks to make it easier. Keep on reading to learn about some of our best techniques to write about yourself naturally!

• Outline your experiences

Ask friends and family for input

• Don’t be too humble…
• Let your personality shine!

Try journaling

Read more: How to start a scholarship essay (with examples)

Outline your impactful experiences

Before you dig into prompts, try writing out a bullet-point list of meaningful experiences you’ve had. Underneath each bullet point, reflect on what they might demonstrate. Here’s an example:

• Working as part of a team
• Learning to balance school and work responsibilities
• Honing communication skills
• Developing writing skills
• Fostering a passion for my school community
• Learning to meet deadlines and balance responsibilities
• Learning to balance school and volunteer responsibilities
• Gaining an attention to detail

This is a little different than a typical resume — rather than focusing on your specific duties, try to focus on how the experience shaped your character. If you notice a lot of overlap between the experiences, that’s perfect! You can point out these recurring themes to make for an effective essay with a strong overarching point. Making lists like this early on in your writing stage can be helpful, and you may find yourself coming back to consult the list for many future essays.

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When writing about yourself, it is important to reflect on your strengths, and who is better to do that than a supportive team of family and friends?

Consulting family and friends is a great way to learn about strengths that you might not even know you had. Your friends choose to hang out with you for a reason, and they often notice your good qualities that you take for granted. Having your friends point these out can be useful for an essay, as well as a general pick-me-up!

And if you’re looking for a perfect anecdote to answer a prompt like “How have you demonstrated a commitment to your community ,” who better to remember your past acts of kindness than your parents? 

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Is it okay to ask friends and family to read my essay and offer feedback?

Some students may be wondering, is it okay to ask for additional help from friends and family? And the short answer is: absolutely. Additional essay reviewers can offer valuable feedback as you write your essay. With this said, students should make sure that they are maintaining their own voice in the essay. Outside reviewers should not be rewriting the essay or having a heavy hand in changing the written voice.

Don’t miss:  How to respond to the Common App essay prompts

Don’t be too humble

There is a time and a place for humility. But don’t worry if you feel like your essay is verging on the braggadocios. These essays are an opportunity to showcase your best qualities, and you should not be worried about putting your best foot forward and telling the reader all the reasons why they should be impressed by you.

What makes these essays effective is that they both include your relevant experiences and demonstrate why they are so significant. You may feel as though you are making mountains out of molehills, but it’s important to emphasize the importance of your experiences. This is the main objective of writing about yourself.

Also recommended: How to write a 500 word essay

Let your personality come through

Most essays written about yourself will be written in first-person. This provides a perfect opportunity to add some flair to your writing. While your first priority is to include impactful examples and communicate your points effectively, it is also important to leave a lasting impression on the reader.

If you see an opportunity to show off your sense of humor or use a more personal tone, don’t be afraid to do it. As long as your remarks are appropriate, on-topic, and not too frequent, they can help put you ahead of the pack.

Recommended:  How does an admissions officer read your application and essays?

A great trick for becoming comfortable writing essays about yourself is to try keeping a journal. Journaling helps eliminate the pressure of writing an essay while helping you become comfortable writing about yourself in an informal setting. Spending 10 or 15 minutes every night writing about your day, or answering some informal prompts can help you to get more in touch with yourself and jog your memory about past events that could be useful for an essay. 

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Next steps for students

Now you’ve learned about the goals and techniques for writing an essay about yourself. Your next step should be to focus on making your writing effective and efficient. Make sure that your conclusion ties everything together impactfully . And once you’ve finished your draft, ask family members, friends, or college counselors to read over it and provide suggestions. Good luck, writers!

Related:  Overview of common scholarship essay prompts

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How to craft a compelling essay about yourself and capture your reader’s attention from the start.

When it comes to crafting a compelling essay about yourself, it can be both challenging and rewarding. Your personal narrative is a unique opportunity to showcase your experiences, personality, and aspirations in a way that captivates the reader. Whether you are writing a college application essay, a scholarship essay, or simply want to share your story with others, there are several key tips to keep in mind to ensure your essay stands out.

First and foremost, be authentic and genuine. Your essay should reflect your true self and values. Avoid embellishing or inventing stories to make yourself appear more impressive. Readers can typically spot insincerity, so it’s important to be honest and transparent in your writing. Share your genuine thoughts, feelings, and experiences to create a compelling and relatable narrative.

Furthermore, focus on a clear and cohesive storyline. Your essay should have a central theme or message that ties everything together. Consider structuring your essay around a specific event, challenge, or accomplishment that has shaped you as a person. By providing a cohesive narrative arc, you can engage the reader and keep them interested from beginning to end.

Techniques for Crafting a Compelling Personal Essay

When crafting a personal essay, it is important to start with a strong and engaging introduction. Use an anecdote, a surprising fact, or a provocative question to grab the reader’s attention from the beginning.

One effective technique for making your personal essay compelling is to be honest and authentic. Share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences in a genuine and meaningful way. This will help readers to connect with you on a deeper level.

Another important tip is to focus on a specific theme or message in your essay. Whether it’s a life lesson you’ve learned, a personal challenge you’ve overcome, or a significant event in your life, having a clear and coherent theme will make your essay more impactful and memorable.

• Use vivid and descriptive language to paint a picture for your readers. Show, don’t tell, by using sensory details and concrete examples to bring your story to life.
• Consider the structure of your essay. Organize your thoughts in a logical and coherent manner, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. This will help to guide your readers through your story and keep them engaged until the end.
• Finally, don’t be afraid to revise and edit your essay multiple times. Revision is an essential part of the writing process, and taking the time to fine-tune your essay will help you to craft a compelling and polished piece of writing.

Strategies to Capture Readers’ Interest in Your Story

When writing an essay about yourself, it’s important to capture the readers’ interest from the very beginning. Here are some strategies to make your story engaging:

1. Start with a hook: Begin your essay with a compelling hook that grabs the readers’ attention. This could be an interesting anecdote, a thought-provoking question, or a shocking statement.

2. Show, don’t tell: Instead of simply listing your accomplishments or qualities, show the readers through vivid descriptions and concrete examples. Paint a picture that allows them to visualize your experiences.

3. Be authentic: Readers are drawn to authenticity, so don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and share your true feelings and thoughts. This will create a connection with your audience.

4. Use descriptive language: Utilize descriptive language to bring your story to life. Add details that engage the readers’ senses and immerse them in your narrative.

5. Keep it concise: While it’s important to provide enough detail, make sure to keep your essay concise and to the point. Avoid rambling or including unnecessary information that may bore your readers.

6. Show growth and reflection: Demonstrate how you’ve grown and evolved through your experiences. Reflect on key moments that have shaped you and share insights that can inspire or resonate with the readers.

Ways to Infuse Personality and Authenticity in Your Writing

1. Be Yourself: The key to writing an engaging essay about yourself is to be authentic and true to who you are. Don’t try to paint a picture of someone you think others want to see. Instead, share your unique perspective and experiences.

2. Use Personal Anecdotes: One effective way to infuse personality into your writing is to include personal anecdotes or stories that showcase your character and values. This helps readers connect with you on a deeper level.

3. Show Vulnerability: Don’t be afraid to show vulnerability in your writing. Sharing your insecurities or struggles can make your essay more relatable and emotionally resonant.

4. Be Specific: Details matter when it comes to writing about yourself. Instead of using general statements, provide specific examples and details that paint a clear picture of who you are and what matters to you.

5. Use Your Voice: Let your personality shine through in your writing by using your own voice. Avoid overly formal language and instead, write in a way that feels natural and true to who you are.

6. Seek Feedback: Before finalizing your essay, consider seeking feedback from others who know you well. They can provide valuable insights and help ensure that your writing truly captures your personality and authenticity.

Tips for Showcasing Your Unique Experiences and Perspectives

1. Be Authentic: When writing about your personal experiences and perspectives, it’s important to be authentic and honest. Share your true thoughts and feelings to create a genuine connection with your readers.

2. Use Concrete Examples: To make your essay more engaging, provide specific examples of your experiences and views. Use vivid descriptions and details to paint a clear picture for your readers.

3. Highlight Your Growth: Reflect on how your experiences have shaped you and contributed to your personal growth. Showcasing your evolution over time can add depth and interest to your essay.

4. Share Unique Insights: Use your essay as an opportunity to share unique insights and perspectives that set you apart from others. Offer fresh perspectives or alternative viewpoints to spark curiosity and intrigue.

5. Engage Your Audience: Consider your audience and tailor your writing to capture their interest. Use storytelling techniques, humor, or emotional appeal to keep your readers engaged from start to finish.

Methods to Conclude Your Essay with Impact and Reflection

1. Summarize Your Main Points: In your conclusion, briefly summarize the key points you’ve made throughout the essay. This reinforces the main ideas and leaves a lasting impression on the reader.

2. Offer a Thought-Provoking Insight: Leave your reader with a thought-provoking insight or a question that encourages further reflection. This can prompt the reader to think about your essay’s themes long after they’ve finished reading.

3. Connect to the Beginning: Consider bringing your essay full circle by referring back to the introduction. This can create a sense of closure and unity in your writing.

4. Reflect on Personal Growth: If your essay is about personal experiences or growth, take the opportunity to reflect on how you’ve evolved or learned from your experiences. This adds depth and meaning to your conclusion.

5. End with a Powerful Quote or Anecdote: Conclude your essay with a powerful quote, anecdote, or statement that encapsulates the main message of your writing. This can leave a strong impact on the reader and make your essay memorable.

By employing these methods, you can craft a conclusion that not only wraps up your essay effectively but also leaves a lasting impression on your audience.

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Frequently asked questions

How do i write about myself in a college essay.

Most importantly, your essay should be about you , not another person or thing. An insightful college admissions essay requires deep self-reflection, authenticity, and a balance between confidence and vulnerability.

Your essay shouldn’t be a résumé of your experiences but instead should tell a story that demonstrates your most important values and qualities.

Frequently asked questions: College admissions essays

When writing your Common App essay , choose a prompt that sparks your interest and that you can connect to a unique personal story.

No matter which prompt you choose, admissions officers are more interested in your ability to demonstrate personal development , insight, or motivation for a certain area of study.

The Common App essay is your primary writing sample within the Common Application, a college application portal accepted by more than 900 schools. All your prospective schools that accept the Common App will read this essay to understand your character, background, and value as a potential student.

Since this essay is read by many colleges, avoid mentioning any college names or programs; instead, save tailored answers for the supplementary school-specific essays within the Common App.

When revising your college essay , first check for big-picture issues regarding your message and content. Then, check for flow, tone, style , and clarity. Finally, focus on eliminating grammar and punctuation errors .

If your college essay goes over the word count limit , cut any sentences with tangents or irrelevant details. Delete unnecessary words that clutter your essay.

If you’re struggling to reach the word count for your college essay, add vivid personal stories or share your feelings and insight to give your essay more depth and authenticity.

If you’ve got to write your college essay fast , don’t panic. First, set yourself deadlines: you should spend about 10% of your remaining time on brainstorming, 10% on outlining, 40% writing, 30% revising, and 10% taking breaks in between stages.

Second, brainstorm stories and values based on your essay prompt.

Third, outline your essay based on the montage or narrative essay structure .

Fourth, write specific, personal, and unique stories that would be hard for other students to replicate.

Fifth, revise your essay and make sure it’s clearly written.

Last, if possible, get feedback from an essay coach . Scribbr essay editors can help you revise your essay in 12 hours or less.

Avoid swearing in a college essay , since admissions officers’ opinions of profanity will vary. In some cases, it might be okay to use a vulgar word, such as in dialogue or quotes that make an important point in your essay. However, it’s safest to try to make the same point without swearing.

If you have bad grades on your transcript, you may want to use your college admissions essay to explain the challenging circumstances that led to them. Make sure to avoid dwelling on the negative aspects and highlight how you overcame the situation or learned an important lesson.

However, some college applications offer an additional information section where you can explain your bad grades, allowing you to choose another meaningful topic for your college essay.

Here’s a brief list of college essay topics that may be considered cliché:

• Extracurriculars, especially sports
• Role models
• Dealing with a personal tragedy or death in the family
• Struggling with new life situations (immigrant stories, moving homes, parents’ divorce)
• Becoming a better person after community service, traveling, or summer camp
• Overcoming a difficult class
• Using a common object as an extended metaphor

It’s easier to write a standout essay with a unique topic. However, it’s possible to make a common topic compelling with interesting story arcs, uncommon connections, and an advanced writing style.

Yes. The college application essay is less formal than other academic writing —though of course it’s not mandatory to use contractions in your essay.

In a college essay , you can be creative with your language . When writing about the past, you can use the present tense to make the reader feel as if they were there in the moment with you. But make sure to maintain consistency and when in doubt, default to the correct verb tense according to the time you’re writing about.

The college admissions essay gives admissions officers a different perspective on you beyond your academic achievements, test scores, and extracurriculars. It’s your chance to stand out from other applicants with similar academic profiles by telling a unique, personal, and specific story.

Use a standard font such as Times New Roman or Arial to avoid distracting the reader from your college essay’s content.

A college application essay is less formal than most academic writing . Instead of citing sources formally with in-text citations and a reference list, you can cite them informally in your text.

For example, “In her research paper on genetics, Quinn Roberts explores …”

There is no set number of paragraphs in a college admissions essay . College admissions essays can diverge from the traditional five-paragraph essay structure that you learned in English class. Just make sure to stay under the specified word count .

Most topics are acceptable for college essays if you can use them to demonstrate personal growth or a lesson learned. However, there are a few difficult topics for college essays that should be avoided. Avoid topics that are:

• Overly personal (e.g. graphic details of illness or injury, romantic or sexual relationships)
• Not personal enough (e.g. broad solutions to world problems, inspiring people or things)
• Too negative (e.g. an in-depth look at your flaws, put-downs of others, criticizing the need for a college essay)
• Too boring (e.g. a resume of your academic achievements and extracurriculars)
• Inappropriate for a college essay (e.g. illegal activities, offensive humor, false accounts of yourself, bragging about privilege)

To write an effective diversity essay , include vulnerable, authentic stories about your unique identity, background, or perspective. Provide insight into how your lived experience has influenced your outlook, activities, and goals. If relevant, you should also mention how your background has led you to apply for this university and why you’re a good fit.

Many universities believe a student body composed of different perspectives, beliefs, identities, and backgrounds will enhance the campus learning and community experience.

Admissions officers are interested in hearing about how your unique background, identity, beliefs, culture, or characteristics will enrich the campus community, which is why they assign a diversity essay .

In addition to your main college essay , some schools and scholarships may ask for a supplementary essay focused on an aspect of your identity or background. This is sometimes called a diversity essay .

You can use humor in a college essay , but carefully consider its purpose and use it wisely. An effective use of humor involves unexpected, keen observations of the everyday, or speaks to a deeper theme. Humor shouldn’t be the main focus of the essay, but rather a tool to improve your storytelling.

Get a second opinion from a teacher, counselor, or essay coach on whether your essay’s humor is appropriate.

Though admissions officers are interested in hearing your story, they’re also interested in how you tell it. An exceptionally written essay will differentiate you from other applicants, meaning that admissions officers will spend more time reading it.

You can use literary devices to catch your reader’s attention and enrich your storytelling; however, focus on using just a few devices well, rather than trying to use as many as possible.

To decide on a good college essay topic , spend time thoughtfully answering brainstorming questions. If you still have trouble identifying topics, try the following two strategies:

• Identify your qualities → Brainstorm stories that demonstrate these qualities
• Identify memorable stories → Connect your qualities to these stories

You can also ask family, friends, or mentors to help you brainstorm topics, give feedback on your potential essay topics, or recall key stories that showcase your qualities.

Yes—admissions officers don’t expect everyone to have a totally unique college essay topic . But you must differentiate your essay from others by having a surprising story arc, an interesting insight, and/or an advanced writing style .

There are no foolproof college essay topics —whatever your topic, the key is to write about it effectively. However, a good topic

• Is meaningful, specific, and personal to you
• Focuses on you and your experiences
• Reveals something beyond your test scores, grades, and extracurriculars
• Is creative and original

Unlike a five-paragraph essay, your admissions essay should not end by summarizing the points you’ve already made. It’s better to be creative and aim for a strong final impression.

You should also avoid stating the obvious (for example, saying that you hope to be accepted).

There are a few strategies you can use for a memorable ending to your college essay :

• Return to the beginning with a “full circle” structure
• Reveal the main point or insight in your story
• Look to the future
• End on an action

The best technique will depend on your topic choice, essay outline, and writing style. You can write several endings using different techniques to see which works best.

College deadlines vary depending on the schools you’re applying to and your application plan:

• For early action applications and the first round of early decision applications, the deadline is on November 1 or 15. Decisions are released by mid-December.
• For the second round of early decision applications, the deadline is January 1 or 15. Decisions are released in January or February.
• Regular decision deadlines usually fall between late November and mid-March, and decisions are released in March or April.
• Rolling admission deadlines run from July to April, and decisions are released around four to eight weeks after submission.

Depending on your prospective schools’ requirements, you may need to submit scores for the SAT or ACT as part of your college application .

Some schools now no longer require students to submit test scores; however, you should still take the SAT or ACT and aim to get a high score to strengthen your application package.

Aim to take the SAT or ACT in the spring of your junior year to give yourself enough time to retake it in the fall of your senior year if necessary.

Apply early for federal student aid and application fee waivers. You can also look for scholarships from schools, corporations, and charitable foundations.

To maximize your options, you should aim to apply to about eight schools:

• Two reach schools that might be difficult to get into
• Four match schools that you have a good chance of getting into
• Two safety schools that you feel confident you’ll get into

The college admissions essay accounts for roughly 25% of the weight of your application .

At highly selective schools, there are four qualified candidates for every spot. While your academic achievements are important, your college admissions essay can help you stand out from other applicants with similar profiles.

In general, for your college application you will need to submit all of the following:

• Your personal information
• List of extracurriculars and awards
• College application essays
• Transcripts
• Standardized test scores
• Recommendation letters.

Different colleges may have specific requirements, so make sure you check exactly what’s expected in the application guidance.

You should start thinking about your college applications the summer before your junior year to give you sufficient time for college visits, taking standardized tests, applying for financial aid , writing essays, and collecting application material.

Yes, but make sure your essay directly addresses the prompt, respects the word count , and demonstrates the organization’s values.

If you plan ahead, you can save time by writing one scholarship essay for multiple prompts with similar questions. In a scholarship tracker spreadsheet, you can group or color-code overlapping essay prompts; then, write a single essay for multiple scholarships. Sometimes, you can even reuse or adapt your main college essay .

You can start applying for scholarships as early as your junior year. Continue applying throughout your senior year.

Invest time in applying for various scholarships , especially local ones with small dollar amounts, which are likely easier to win and more reflective of your background and interests. It will be easier for you to write an authentic and compelling essay if the scholarship topic is meaningful to you.

You can find scholarships through your school counselor, community network, or an internet search.

A scholarship essay requires you to demonstrate your values and qualities while answering the prompt’s specific question.

After researching the scholarship organization, identify a personal experience that embodies its values and exemplifies how you will be a successful student.

A standout college essay has several key ingredients:

• A unique, personally meaningful topic
• A memorable introduction with vivid imagery or an intriguing hook
• Specific stories and language that show instead of telling
• Vulnerability that’s authentic but not aimed at soliciting sympathy
• Clear writing in an appropriate style and tone
• A conclusion that offers deep insight or a creative ending

While timelines will differ depending on the student, plan on spending at least 1–3 weeks brainstorming and writing the first draft of your college admissions essay , and at least 2–4 weeks revising across multiple drafts. Don’t forget to save enough time for breaks between each writing and editing stage.

You should already begin thinking about your essay the summer before your senior year so that you have plenty of time to try out different topics and get feedback on what works.

Your college essay accounts for about 25% of your application’s weight. It may be the deciding factor in whether you’re accepted, especially for competitive schools where most applicants have exceptional grades, test scores, and extracurricular track records.

In most cases, quoting other people isn’t a good way to start your college essay . Admissions officers want to hear your thoughts about yourself, and quotes often don’t achieve that. Unless a quote truly adds something important to your essay that it otherwise wouldn’t have, you probably shouldn’t include it.

Cliché openers in a college essay introduction are usually general and applicable to many students and situations. Most successful introductions are specific: they only work for the unique essay that follows.

The key to a strong college essay introduction is not to give too much away. Try to start with a surprising statement or image that raises questions and compels the reader to find out more.

The introduction of your college essay is the first thing admissions officers will read and therefore your most important opportunity to stand out. An excellent introduction will keep admissions officers reading, allowing you to tell them what you want them to know.

You can speed up this process by shortening and smoothing your writing with a paraphrasing tool . After that, you can use the summarizer to shorten it even more.

If you’re struggling to reach the word count for your college essay, add vivid personal stories or share your feelings and insight to give your essay more depth and authenticity.

Most college application portals specify a word count range for your essay, and you should stay within 10% of the upper limit to write a developed and thoughtful essay.

You should aim to stay under the specified word count limit to show you can follow directions and write concisely. However, don’t write too little, as it may seem like you are unwilling or unable to write a detailed and insightful narrative about yourself.

If no word count is specified, we advise keeping your essay between 400 and 600 words.

In your application essay , admissions officers are looking for particular features : they want to see context on your background, positive traits that you could bring to campus, and examples of you demonstrating those qualities.

Colleges want to be able to differentiate students who seem similar on paper. In the college application essay , they’re looking for a way to understand each applicant’s unique personality and experiences.

You don’t need a title for your college admissions essay , but you can include one if you think it adds something important.

Your college essay’s format should be as simple as possible:

• Use a standard, readable font
• Use 1.5 or double spacing
• If attaching a file, save it as a PDF
• Stick to the word count
• Avoid unusual formatting and unnecessary decorative touches

There are no set rules for how to structure a college application essay , but these are two common structures that work:

• A montage structure, a series of vignettes with a common theme.
• A narrative structure, a single story that shows your personal growth or how you overcame a challenge.

Avoid the five-paragraph essay structure that you learned in high school.

Campus visits are always helpful, but if you can’t make it in person, the college website will have plenty of information for you to explore. You should look through the course catalog and even reach out to current faculty with any questions about the school.

Colleges set a “Why this college?” essay because they want to see that you’ve done your research. You must prove that you know what makes the school unique and can connect that to your own personal goals and academic interests.

Depending on your writing, you may go through several rounds of revision . Make sure to put aside your essay for a little while after each editing stage to return with a fresh perspective.

Teachers and guidance counselors can help you check your language, tone, and content . Ask for their help at least one to two months before the submission deadline, as many other students will also want their help.

Friends and family are a good resource to check for authenticity. It’s best to seek help from family members with a strong writing or English educational background, or from older siblings and cousins who have been through the college admissions process.

If possible, get help from an essay coach or editor ; they’ll have specialized knowledge of college admissions essays and be able to give objective expert feedback.

When revising your college essay , first check for big-picture issues regarding message, flow, tone, style , and clarity. Then, focus on eliminating grammar and punctuation errors.

Include specific, personal details and use your authentic voice to shed a new perspective on a common human experience.

Through specific stories, you can weave your achievements and qualities into your essay so that it doesn’t seem like you’re bragging from a resume.

When writing about yourself , including difficult experiences or failures can be a great way to show vulnerability and authenticity, but be careful not to overshare, and focus on showing how you matured from the experience.

First, spend time reflecting on your core values and character . You can start with these questions:

• What are three words your friends or family would use to describe you, and why would they choose them?
• Whom do you admire most and why?
• What are you most proud of? Ashamed of?

However, you should do a comprehensive brainstorming session to fully understand your values. Also consider how your values and goals match your prospective university’s program and culture. Then, brainstorm stories that illustrate the fit between the two.

In a college application essay , you can occasionally bend grammatical rules if doing so adds value to the storytelling process and the essay maintains clarity.

However, use standard language rules if your stylistic choices would otherwise distract the reader from your overall narrative or could be easily interpreted as unintentional errors.

Write concisely and use the active voice to maintain a quick pace throughout your essay and make sure it’s the right length . Avoid adding definitions unless they provide necessary explanation.

Use first-person “I” statements to speak from your perspective . Use appropriate word choices that show off your vocabulary but don’t sound like you used a thesaurus. Avoid using idioms or cliché expressions by rewriting them in a creative, original way.

If you’re an international student applying to a US college and you’re comfortable using American idioms or cultural references , you can. But instead of potentially using them incorrectly, don’t be afraid to write in detail about yourself within your own culture.

Provide context for any words, customs, or places that an American admissions officer might be unfamiliar with.

College application essays are less formal than other kinds of academic writing . Use a conversational yet respectful tone , as if speaking with a teacher or mentor. Be vulnerable about your feelings, thoughts, and experiences to connect with the reader.

Aim to write in your authentic voice , with a style that sounds natural and genuine. You can be creative with your word choice, but don’t use elaborate vocabulary to impress admissions officers.

Admissions officers use college admissions essays to evaluate your character, writing skills , and ability to self-reflect . The essay is your chance to show what you will add to the academic community.

The college essay may be the deciding factor in your application , especially for competitive schools where most applicants have exceptional grades, test scores, and extracurriculars.

Some colleges also require supplemental essays about specific topics, such as why you chose that specific college . Scholarship essays are often required to obtain financial aid .

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9 Tips for Writing an Essay About Yourself

You know yourself better than anyone else, but writing about yourself can still be tough! When applying for scholarships or to college, essay prompts  can feel so general (and yet so specific!) that they leave us stumped.  So we’ll show you 8 tips to write an essay about yourself, so that you can land more scholarships. (Psst – Going Merry makes applying easy .)

1. Create a List of Questions

2. brainstorm and outline, 3. be vulnerable, 4. use personal examples, 5. write in the first person, 6. don’t be afraid to show off…but stay on topic, 7. show personality , 8. know your audience, 9. proofread and edit.

Let’s start with some examples of personal essay prompts:

• Tell me about yourself.
• Describe a challenge or event that made you who you are today.
• What are your short and long-term goals, and how do you plan to achieve them?
• Write about a time you failed at something. How did it affect you?

These are just a few of many scholarship essay prompts that require you to look internally, to answer a question, solve a problem, or explain a scenario in your life.  

We get it. You might not be a big fan of bragging about yourself, or you might want to keep your personal stories to yourself. But by opening up and sharing your story, you can show scholarship providers, colleges and universities who you are, and why you’re deserving of their scholarship.

(Don’t just take our word for it – check out our scholarship winners page full of students like you who were brave enough to share their stories with us).

To get started, check out these 9 tips on how to write an essay about yourself:

After reading through the scholarship essay prompt, breathe, and make a list of smaller questions you can answer, which relate to the big essay prompt question. 

Let’s say the main essay prompt question asks you, “What were challenges or barriers you had to work to overcome?” Then the smaller questions might be something like:

• What is your background? Family, finances, school.
• What was challenging about that background?
• What’s your greatest accomplishment? How did you get there? How have previous challenges influenced your goals?

Think of these questions as mini-prompts. They explain your story and help you answer the main essay prompt with more details than if you just answered it without a plan in place.

After considering smaller questions, it’s time to brainstorm your answers.  Take out a pen and paper – or open up a document on a computer – and take your time in answering each mini-prompt. Organize your responses in order:

• Intro to main essay prompt.
• Answer about 3 mini-prompt questions.
• Conclude by rewriting the answer to the main essay prompt with a summary of your mini-prompt answers.

This organization will help you stay on topic and answer the prompt directly. (Or check out these 6 scholarship essay examples for alternative essay structures.)

Don’t be afraid to let your strengths, challenges, and personal stories shine through in your essay! Scholarship and admissions committees love to see that you’re self-aware how you can improve as a person, or how you’ve grown because of your experiences. Honest writing can help tell the best stories (in this case, YOUR story).

Since this essay is all about you , you should make your answer as specific as possible! Avoid using generalizations (e.g., “I’m really good at music). Instead, go for more personalized statements (e.g., “My fourth-grade teacher Ms. Matay really inspired me to pursue my interest in the clarinet”). Your personal examples are what will help your scholarship essay stand out among the thousands of applicants..

 You’re telling your story, so write from your perspective! You can narrate your story. You can provide an overview of what you learned from your experiences. However you choose to answer the prompt, we recommend writing in an active tone, and using “I” and “me” throughout your essay.

Most students worry about bragging in their essay, but we say go for it! This is your time to shine, so highlight your accomplishments and strengths.  Review your essay to make sure that you’re keeping the tone informative and that you’re still on topic. (Brag while answering the essay prompt; don’t just mention random, unrelated but impressive facts about yourself!)You can use this brag sheet where you can brainstorm your accomplishments. While the worksheet is geared toward requesting letters of recommendation , you can still use it to write out your hobbies, interests, college list , and strengths to help you answer your scholarship essay prompt.

Just because it’s an essay doesn’t mean it has to be dry and boring. This essay is all about you, so let your personality shine through. If you’re the class clown, you can use a bit of humor. If you wear your heart on your sleeve, don’t be afraid to show emotion. Trying your best to express who you are as a person will have a huge effect on the admissions or scholarship committee!

If you’re applying for a scholarship, research the scholarship provider. If you’re applying to college, research the school. Understanding what makes the provider/college unique and what their motivations are, will allow you to incorporate that information in your essay. For example, many scholarships are funded by private companies that sell products. You might want to reference those products in your essay. A good example of this is Emily Trader’s essay for the Life Happens organization , where she uses her personal narrative to explain the importance of insurance planning, since that is the mission of the organization (which is funded by insurance companies).

The last step in answering your essay prompt is to double-check your work! One typo can be distracting and cause scholarship providers to scratch their head while reading the essay. ( Psst, humble brag: Going Merry’s application platform includes spellcheck because we’ve got your back .) In addition to proofreading for typos and grammatical errors, also consider whether the sentence or paragraph structure makes sense. Are you breaking paragraphs in the right place? Are you using topic sentences well to signpost your main ideas? Does the essay flow? Consider these “bigger” structural questions too.  You might also want to ask a friend, family member, teacher, or guidance counselor to review your essay. They might catch something you didn’t see the first time around, and that can really help your essay! In fact, that is scholarship winner Daniel Gill ’s #1 tip. (Another tip is to apply for scholarships using Going Merry !)

Also, check out this helpful list of the 10 most common scholarship essay topics while you’re brainstorming!

Now that you know how to write an essay about yourself, it’s time to start applying for scholarships! Remember: You’ve got this. 

Sign up for your free Going Merry profile . From there, you can easily upload and submit your essay for thousands of scholarships. We make it easy so you’ll only need to enter your profile information once! And then, you can apply away. In fact, we even have some bundled scholarships so that you only enter your essay once, to apply for multiple scholarships at the same time.

Or if you’re not ready to register, simply sign up to receive an email with 20 new scholarship opportunities each week. Just enter your email address below:

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5 Steps To Write An Essay About Yourself

Writing essays and academic papers are two such responsibilities for which students often face challenges throughout their academic life.

In fact, self-introduction essays are among the most typical assignments students confront among the many other essays.

Writing an essay about yourself necessitates you to possess excellent writing and storytelling abilities.

To produce a great personal essay, students must devote time, patience, and work. This article will educate you on how to write an essay on yourself, your family, a personal experience, and so on.

However, if you are time-pressed and unable to compose an essay, there are services that write same-day essays for students too.

When Might You Need to Write About Yourself?

Self-introduction essays or writing an essay about yourself is required during various circumstances of your academic and professional life.

Aside from the obvious cases, such as a personal statement or self-evaluations/appraisals, here are other situations where you’ll be required to write an essay about yourself:

• For graduation school applications
• When writing biographies
• For career advancement opportunities
• In cover letters and resumes
• Seeking internship opportunities
• In grant proposals

Most people think that writing an essay about yourself is one of the easiest tasks to do. Nonetheless, that may not be the case for most students.

One must possess good college writing skills to put their best foot forward and impress the reader to stand out among their peers. And here’s how you can do it correctly and confidently.

What Must the Self-Introduction Essay Include?

Writing an essay about yourself is a perfect opportunity to write about your strengths, achievements, and unique characteristics that provide an insight into yourself.

You may be confused about what exactly to write or express in your self-introduction essay. So, in this post, we will explain what you can write about yourself that will help you score brownie points and stand out amidst the competition.

Also, check out these examples and samples on self-introductory essays .

For instance, when writing about yourself, consider your path and the things that have shaped you into the person you are. You can also write about various things such as:

• Your hobbies
• Your aspirations and dreams
• The things you want to learn
• The things you are best at

How to Write an Essay

Before composing an essay, understand the basic structure and prepare an outline to avoid any mistakes down the road.

So if you are wondering how to structure an essay, remember that all essays follow a basic structure – introduction, the body, and conclusion.

Introduction

This is the first part of the essay, and it must pique the reader’s interest. You must add a ‘hook’ here to keep the reader glued.

You must provide a thesis statement at the beginning of your writing that exhibits the main idea of your essay.

Overall, the introduction must provide a brief overview of the entire essay in an engaging way.

The section contains a minimum of three paragraphs that explain the major themes or story of the essay. Ensure that each paragraph connects smoothly with the next. It is best to write in chronological order to avoid confusion.

This is the last paragraph or last section of the essay, and it must logically conclude your story. Here you can highlight the lesson you’ve gained throughout your experience. It is better to keep this section short.

Essay Structure

This is the basic structure that one must follow when writing an essay. Once you understand the essay format, create an outline that includes:

• An introduction about yourself
• Your most significant professional experience
• Noteworthy awards or personal accomplishments
• Relevant information about your personal life

Note: Make sure you use an appropriate tone if it is not mentioned. While an informal tone is used when writing about personal experiences, remember not to use any ‘slang’ words that might look unprofessional.

Steps to Writing an Effective Essay

Use particular anecdotes to highlight your accomplishments and traits without appearing pretentious.

You can also write about difficulties you’ve encountered or mistakes you’ve made to demonstrate vulnerability and personal progress.

1. Self-Reflection

The first step is to reflect on the topic before you begin writing to determine what you want to include in your essay.

Having a thorough brainstorming session can help a lot. However, here are a few starter questions that can help you:

• What has influenced your hobbies or future ambitions?
• What are you most pleased with?
• Why do you look up to someone in particular?
• Consider how your values and aspirations mirror your target university’s program and culture as you self-reflect. Develop tales that highlight the fit between the two.

2. Write Something Extraordinary

Using the questions above, pick an incident or some strong point about yourself to elucidate.

Remember that you must write about a single incident or quality that makes you stand out. Avoid talking about two qualities or two incidents.

3. Define the Goal

Read the essay guidelines and align your writing with that. The goal of your essay must reflect well in your words.

4. Know Your Audience

Think about your audience’s expectations and interests. It is critical to capture their attention and keep them reading your work until the finish.

5. Detailed Outline

The outline must be detailed and include all significant points.

Once the outline is ready, you can expand it into a full-fledged essay using the vital points. After completing the essay, proofread for typos and grammatical errors to ensure there are no mistakes.

These are the steps that college students can follow when writing self-introduction essays.

The first step to writing a successful essay is selecting an incident or quality that you want to write about.

It is recommended that you brainstorm the ideas and create an outline to avoid mishaps later.

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How to Write a Short Essay About Yourself: Step-By-Step

Updated 06/4/2022

Published 06/19/2020

Yvonne Bertovich

Contributing writer

Cake values integrity and transparency. We follow a strict editorial process to provide you with the best content possible. We also may earn commission from purchases made through affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. Learn more in our affiliate disclosure .

Writing or even talking about yourself may not come easily to you. However, for professional or educational reasons, it’s often a necessity. There are other instances when writing about yourself may make more sense, as you can provide the rawest and most honest perspective.

Jump ahead to these sections:

Steps for writing about yourself, tips for writing about yourself creatively or confidently.

• Examples of Things to Write About Yourself

You should feel empowered—not intimidated—in taking on a writing project about yourself. Use it as a way to challenge how you view your own experiences, talents, and more. We’ll discuss some steps for writing about yourself as well as provide a few examples.  

Writing isn’t for everyone, especially when it’s required. As much as you may dislike it, following the steps below can help the process go that much more smoothly.

If you find that following a different order than what we’ve recommended for you works better for your process, feel free to adjust accordingly. 

Step 1: Determine your purpose 

What’s causing you to write this “thing” about yourself? What exactly are you writing? It may surprise you that people write all kinds of pieces for themselves—even writing your own obituary isn’t out of the question anymore. 

The more specific you can get with yourself about your purpose will help the rest of the process. If it’s something stressful, like a college admission essay or a cover letter, try to frame the project in a different light. 

For example, “I’m writing this essay to show people my heart and how passionate I am about removing disparities and barriers in healthcare. I believe in my abilities, and I want to further my education, so I can help heal people.”

Step 2: Ask yourself some questions 

For any good piece of writing, there has to be fact behind it (if even these facts are abstract in narrative or fiction). The best way to gather facts about any subject is to ask a variety of questions, both soft- and hard-hitting. 

You may ask these questions internally, during research, or directly and literally. Treat this question step as a self-interview.

Here are some questions to ask yourself . You may also ask yourself:

• What is my goal of writing this piece?
• What themes or ideas do I want to focus on?
• What are my strengths and weaknesses?
• What are some important lessons I’ve learned?
• What do I want others to know or understand about me?

Step 3: Organize your answers 

After asking yourself the example questions above as well as others, you should be sure to write down your answers and begin organizing them if you haven’t already. 

It may be tempting to just answer your own questions in your head as you go—but don’t. This will just make the writing step more difficult. You may think that you’ll remember every good point or profound thought you come up with, but memory is a tricky thing. 

If you’re working through your questions during a time when you’re not ready or able to sit down and type or scribble them out, at least make some notes in your phone or in a journal so you can have some descriptive hints for later. No matter how big of an epiphany you may have, it’s possible you’ll forget it. 

Step 4: Write a draft 

If your ideas are already fairly organized, writing your draft should come fairly easily to you. The draft process, however, is when you can start spicing things up with anecdotes, your own personal voice, themes, metaphors—all that fun stuff. The point in you writing something about yourself for yourself is for the very reason that you can make it unquestionably you .

Dull, watered-down words or even over-hyped language from a thesaurus plug-in isn’t going to impress anyone. Writing something about yourself (unless the assignment is creative or unorthodox) isn’t the time to act like something you’re not.

All of this being said, don’t stress yourself out too much. Letting your ideas flow freely and then editing or revising them later is how you should approach the process anyway. You don’t want to put too many restrictions on your ideas from the get-go. Warring with yourself about your ideas while writing is only going to tire you out sooner. 

Think about it—you may spend hours trying to write a piece while overthinking that’s no better than a draft you could have written in 30 minutes on the fly. Not being totally in love with your first draft is normal. It just allows you that much more room to improve. 

Step 5: Put your progress aside

Much like during the draft process, it’s very possible to overthink your work after it’s mostly done. If you constantly keep re-reading it or rehashing your ideas in your head, they may start to sound odd, or you may try to add where you need to trim. 

For example, the same concept applies to repeating the same word over and over aloud — it’ll likely start to sound strange or even wrong the more you hear it. This also applies to music — ever play a song you love over and over till you hate it? 

You need to give your words and your brain some time to rest away from each other until you try to make any drastic edits or changes. That being said, you may love what you’ve written already and decide you don’t need to change a thing—that’s great!

Step 6: Review and edit

After your break, you can pick up your writing once again. Read it with a critical eye. Go back and think deeply about your purpose and any provided prompts. Have you answered everything you intended to or are required to?

It’s not uncommon—though devastating—to write an entire piece only to realize you wrote from the wrong frame of reference or focused on the wrong issue. For example, if you were asked to write about a challenge you overcame in your life by following an important virtue, but you only wrote about winning a basketball championship and not the struggle behind it, this may miss the mark. 

If you find a good number of issues in your work, don’t feel tempted to scrap the entire thing. What may work instead is to copy and paste your writing line-by-line into a new document. This way, you can save as much as possible while being sure to resolve even small discrepancies.

Step 7: Finalize your work

After you’ve undergone the brutal process of self-editing (or enlisting help from someone else you trust) you can prepare yourself for the home stretch. Finalizing your work shouldn’t take very long.

Y our process may differ; however, it’ll likely come down to reading over your work a few more times just to make sure you haven’t missed words, punctuation, or proper grammar. 

It’s OK to use this step to feel proud of yourself, too. You may not take a lot of time to reflect on your life and everything you’ve been through—it’s important to practice self-love in this way and celebrate your accomplishments.

Talking or writing about yourself may not be everyone’s cup of tea. For example, did you need to provide a fun fact recently but draw a blank? You’re not alone. In fact, many people have a false assumption that they’re boring. 

On the flip side, perhaps you’re used to talking about yourself, or, at least you’ve got the “fake it till you make it” type of confidence down-pat. However, you too can only benefit from adding a bit more razzle-dazzle to your spiels and writing assignments. Here are a few tips for writing about yourself creatively or confidently.  

Allow yourself space

If you have an upcoming project or writing assignment that has you on edge, consider stepping away. Even if you don’t consider yourself an outdoorsy person, a walk around the block may help you breathe and get your creativity flowing. Naturally, the more sound your idea or angle, the more confident you’ll feel about your upcoming performance.  

Keep that ego in check

An underinflated ego is just as bad as an overinflated one. Pay close attention to your internal dialogue when approaching new projects or writing tasks (or, honestly anything that comes up during your day). How much of what swirls around in your mind is fact? How much of it is just fleeting thoughts or opinions? You are not your thoughts, and you always have choices. Make good ones and be kind to yourself. 

Try this: Instead of thinking to yourself, “Wow, this is a really complex writing assignment. I can’t do this.” Or, “How am I ever going to get into my dream school with this essay? I’m not a strong writer.” 

Change your internal dialogue to, “I have good ideas. I may not have my plan figured out right now, but I’ll get it done,” or, “I have so many great skills to bring to the table and I am very passionate about what’s brought me here. I will convey this the best I can.”

Crowdsource

Sometimes an outside opinion can give us much-needed perspective. Ask your friends, family, loved ones, or coworkers to describe you in a few words or even in abstract ways. Don’t view this as you’re fishing for compliments. Ask your loved ones for honesty, as this insight can only help you when writing about yourself. 

Build up a fuel bank

Pulling inspiration out of thin air may not always be possible. However, if you build up a few reliable sources of inspiration, the next time a project hits, you’ll be prepared. You can fuel your creativity and confidence in a variety of ways. 

For example, you can create certain playlists for different moods, save favorite art or graphics in a digital folder or keep printed versions in your home or office, write down affirmations or notes-to-self in a journal or app, and so on. 

Reflect on past accomplishments and setbacks

Even if you aren’t a fan of journaling, writing about yourself is far easier if you take the time to reflect, if only mentally. If you know you have a deadline to write about yourself in the near future, you may want to physically or mentally jot down a few real-life examples or experiences that come to mind. 

But how do you get in the right headspace to reflect? What if you only witness recurring thoughts about past events while trying to fall asleep? Be sure to practice the first tip in this section: Give yourself some space to think. For once, limit the distractions, keep all other screens put away or turn on your "do not disturb" feature.

Now, think about some past accomplishments or setbacks that may not even seem relevant to the topic of the assignment. You may have an epiphany about unrelated things or discover something about how you operate. For example, you might realize that you feel less nervous in social and professional settings if you call out your anxiety as being excited. 

Examples of Writing About Yourself

Even if you feel super confident about writing about yourself now, we wanted to provide a few short examples to help you get started. Your tone, word choice, and more may differ depending on which piece you’re working on.

Here are some tips for writing or publishing your life story you may also find helpful. 

In a memoir or essay

Those were probably the best and the worst days of my life. I had never felt more happy and never felt more sad. I felt as though I were so close to having everything I had ever wanted, yet it seemed with every step forward, I had to take two steps back. It was exhausting. How did I get through it? To be quite honest, I have no damn idea. 

Perspective helped. I knew I could have had it way worse; I knew that my struggle wasn’t unique. I knew, too, that even when the small wins would come they’d have yet another loss right on their tails. I paid dearly for having too much heart and optimism, so I regularly had to hose myself down with logic and pessimism. 

On your blog or website

If you’re reading this, it’s too late. Just kidding! That’s just a really good Drake album. I wanted to take some time to talk about what’s been going on in my life lately for those of you who are nosey enough to care. Again, kidding, I know some of you really care. I’m so grateful to have even this small following that I have. It’s wild, really. Who would have thought that people want to know what’s going on in my head at any given time? Joke’s on you guys, though, because I don’t fully know all the time. 

I guess I’ll start off by saying that work has been a whirlwind. As you all know, it isn’t an easy time for anyone, so please don’t take this declaration as a complaint. I’m thrilled to still have a job despite everything going on. However, leaving this reflection at just that would be doing both myself and you all a disservice. It’s weak. It doesn’t really describe what’s been going on. Allow me to continue.  

In a college essay

When I was young, my grandmother told me I couldn’t please everyone — that some people just wouldn’t like me for no reason at all. This was very hard for me to swallow at times. What does this have to do with who I am today and why I plan to attend your university? 

Well, this early lesson demonstrates that in order for this world to keep spinning, we all have to be unwavering in our own pursuits. We are ourselves. We can’t be anyone else. In that, we all have the responsibility to bring our unique talents, wisdom, and heart to the table — even when we’re seated across from people who may not like us. 

Sometimes Only You Can Do It

Writing about yourself may always be challenging for you, but who better to do so than who knows you best? If you work through the process in every situation and give yourself some patience, there’s no question that you can’t craft something amazing. You may also be interested in this article about how to write family stories .

Your written words mean more than you think. This becomes a part of your legacy when you're gone, and it's one of the ways you'll be remembered. While many families choose custom urns from Foreverence or even to craft memorial diamonds from Eterneva , your words are something that live after you're gone.

While it might not seem natural at first, learning to write about yourself, your perspective, and your experiences carries a lot of significance. Who knows who might read these words when you're gone?

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17+ Great Ideas for an Essay About Yourself

Chris Drew (PhD)

Dr. Chris Drew is the founder of the Helpful Professor. He holds a PhD in education and has published over 20 articles in scholarly journals. He is the former editor of the Journal of Learning Development in Higher Education. [Image Descriptor: Photo of Chris]

Learn about our Editorial Process

An essay about yourself should present you in a positive light, but also leave your reader with a greater understanding of what it is that makes you tick. What’s your inspiration and motivation?

In this article, I’ll give you a range of ideas to include in your essay about yourself. These ideas will show you how to tell a compelling story about who you are.

Pick one or more of these ideas and use it in your essay to improve its quality.

1. Come up with One Word about Yourself and Put it in your Title

Your essay heading sets the tone for the rest of the essay.

One way to get yourself started on the right track for your essay describing yourself is to ensure you have the one key word that describes you in the title.

How would you describe yourself in one word?

Here’s a few ways I’d describe myself:

• Introverted

Now, if you need to write your essay in a way that presents you in the best way possible, then of course you’d select the one that does that!

So for me, that’d be ‘optimistic’.

I could then set my title to something like: “An Essay About Chris, the Eternal Optimist.”

Here, your reader has been introduced to the central trait I want to reinforce in the essay right away. You’ve set the tone now.

Now that you’ve used that key term at the start, make sure you follow-up by using that same term a few more times throughout the piece so that you keep it as a clear motif throughout. I’d recommend at least using it in the introduction, body and conclusion.

2. Make it Personal using Anecdotes

The difference between a good and great essay about yourself is the use of personal anecdotes.

You want your essay to stand out because it’s thoughtful and unique.

Anyone can tell a story of who they are. Anyone can say: “Here’s who I am and here’s what’s good about me.”

Not everyone can tell a detailed, thoughtful and personal story that’ll show (and not tell) people who you are.

Personal anecdotes might include:

• A discussion about your ancestry;
• A story about how your ancestors came to your country;
• A story about how your parents came up with your childhood nickname;
• An important story from your childhood;
• A personal challenge that you currently face;
• A personal challenge from the past that you’ve overcome

Or anything else that shows your personality! So, let’s zoom in and take a look at how you could write about each of the points from above.

3. Describe your Ancestry

Dig deep – way back. Who are your ancestors?

Two of the best questions you can ask to tell a really good story about yourself are these:

Who are your ancestors?

How did your ancestors shape who you are.

What is your connection to them?

Let’s take them one at a time.

Your ancestors might be Greek, or Scottish, or Irish, or Italian. Maybe you have some Native American ancestors or maybe they were Pioneers heading to America?

You can start this essay by explaining your ancestry to really start shaping a quality story about yourself. One example is to tell a story about how your ancestors came to your country.

For me, I’d talk about how my Ancestors were a loose collection of quirky characters who came to Australia for a better life. Some were “10 Pound Poms” – British people seeking a better life. The paid 10 pounds to get on a boat and head to a new world. And others were convicts, sent out for stealing sheep.

Is there an interesting hook about your ancestry to start your essay?

Your ancestors should mean a lot to you. They should show you the path to a better life. What sacrifices did they make for you to be who you are today?

I could talk about how they had a tough life to come from working-class backgrounds. They worked the land and battled hardship to give me what I’ve got.

Now, I’m a happy, free, relatively wealthy person because of their hard world.

Who you are is because of your ancestors.

For me, they are the reason I value hard work. I also know my grandfather fought hard for a good wage for people on the railways. So, I have a sense of solidarity with hard-working working-class people because of him.

I also believe strongly in the importance of living a free and happy life because my ancestors are Australians. We’re Aussies! We work hard and have fun. That’s something my ancestors gave me, and I’ll carry all those values forward for my children one day, too.

Can you see that telling a story of your ancestors can really reveal a lot about what’s deep inside you? They show you your values and they’re your guiding star.

4. Tell the story of how you got your Childhood Nickname

Here’s another interesting story idea that can get your essay started on the right track.

How about telling the story of how you got your childhood nickname?

Here’s an example: My sister’s nickname was Boo Boo.

(She’d be made at me if she knew I told you that!)

She was called Boo Boo because she was always hurting herself! She was always having “boo boos”, which was our slang for “mistakes”.

Here, her nickname tells a story about herself. It tells a story about how she can sometimes be a little bit clumsy. This could be a good personal story to use to introduce herself to the reader.

Do you have a unique nickname story?

5. Tell an Important Story from your Childhood

Do you have any childhood stories that really reflect who you are?

This story might be:

• Tell the story of a childhood family holiday: Your story of your family holiday might highlight how important family is to your sense of who you are. Did the family holiday show you how much family is important to you?
• Tell the story of a time you realized something: I remember seeing a kid at school being bullied once and feeling really uncomfortable about it. I ended up sitting with him during the lunch period because he was upset. That was the day I really realized that something deep inside me is a sense that kindness is one of the most important things in the world.

Have a think. Are there any stories from your childhood that you can tell that reveal something about who you are and what your values are?

6. Start with “When I’m old I will look back and reflect on…”

Here’s a strategy that works really well.

When you start from the perspective of someone looking back, you often reflect on the things that are most important.

Have you ever seen an older person telling a story? It’s often a story told from the perspective of wisdom . We might call this 20/20 hindsight.

So, start your story by discussing what you’ll look back on about your life: what will you be proud of? What parts of your personality would you want to reflect on with pride?

It might be:

• “When I’m old I will look back and reflect on the things I did to help other people. For example, one time I … [did this]”
• “When I’m old I will look back and reflect on the quality time I spent with my family. My family is the most important thing in my life. One of these quality times is when …”
• Any other ideas you have?

7. Or, Start with “In ten years I will be…”

We can flip Step 6 on its head, and talk about where you want to be in 10 years. This will force you to reflect upon what’s most important to your future.

When talking about your goals and how those goals are linked to your values.

Here’s some examples:

• “In ten years time I will be just returning from an amazing trip around the world. I have a strong sense of adventure and I want to spend the next 10 years fulfilling my dream of adventure.”
• “In ten years time I want to be busy working in a not-for-profit doing something for people less fortunate than me. This vision drives my decisions that I make today. It drives my desire to … [study a course?]”
• What will you say if you start with “In ten years time…”?

8. Describe your Interests

No matter how you start your essay, you need to make sure that your story shows what you are interested in.

Your interests are what you do in your spare time

You might, for example, be interested in a particular topic. This will show how you’re set apart from others. We all have different interests.

Here’s a few examples of people’s interests:

• Dinosaurs: Ross Gellar from the TV show Friends would write in his story that one of his biggest interests is dinosaurs!
• Sports: Many people put sports at the center of their interests and motivations. Are you passionate about a sport that you watch or play? This could be included in your essay about yourself.
• Reading: Many young people love to read. You can talk about this as something you love, and then discuss how reading helps you think more deeply about issues in this world.

What are your interests? Could you use these as the basis of your essay about yourself?

9. Describe what Motivates You

Right at the core of your essay about yourself should be a message about your motivations. What is it that you dream about? What is it that gets you out of bed in the morning?

A motivation is different to an interest. Your interest is what you do in your part-time. Your motivations are your long-term goals that will give you fulfillmen t.

People want to see what makes you tick.

Your motivations don’t have to be for money or a career. A lot of people are deeply motivated by their passions like:

• Getting fit, or pursuing fitness goals;
• Being a part of a community;
• Helping others out, especially the less fortunate;
• Making their family proud;
• Seeing amazing, remarkable things;
• Inventing or discovering something that improves the world

For me, my biggest motivation is my blog. I take pride in it and how it helps people out. So maybe I’d tell the story of my blog, and how it reflects my intrinsic desire to help people learn new things.

So, what motivates you?

10. Identify your Current Personal Challenges

Teachers like to see that you are taking a proactive role to address or overcome personal challenges. So, you can base your essay about yourself on a current personal challenge.

The important thing for an essay on a current personal challenge is this:

• Identify what your challenge is; and
• Explain how you are working hard to address it.

Your challenge might be a personal disability, a setback you’ve recently had, or a goal that you’re working towards achieving.

• Wanting to join the military: You could talk about your major challenge being a career goal like getting accepted into the military. Then, you’d need to show something about how you are addressing this by, for example, following a rigorous exercise regime.
• Living with a disability: Maybe you have a disability or medical problem that you need to address. You could talk about how it hasn’t stopped you from believing in your ability to achieve. While it might make life harder, show how you’re a determined person who won’t let adversity get in your way.

By revealing how you are overcoming your challenges, you’re revealing something about yourself. You are showing your marker that you’re a hard, diligent worker. That you have resilience and drive. And that you’re someone who strives to achieve.

11. Identify the Biggest Challenge you’ve Overcome

If there’s challenges in your rear-view mirror that you have already overcome, you can also talk about that.

Pause for a moment and think about the biggest achievement of your life. Was it getting that score you wanted in a science test? Was it making it into the football team after a lot of training and practice?

By telling the story of a personal challenge that you have already overcome, you’re showing how you’re a competent, capable and resilient person.

Here’s some examples of overcoming challenges:

• Winning a team sport: Talk about all the work you did as a team in the lead-up to the win. Did you take advice from the coach and use it to become better? Did you learn that you had to work as a group to succeed?
• Getting an award: Were you awarded once for your skills? What did you need to do to win the award? Was it hard work that paid off?

12. Be Humble

It’s important to strike the appropriate tone for your essay about yourself.

One of the biggest mistakes people make is that they too hard to sell themselves. This usually makes you sound arrogant and self-absorbed.

One of the best ways to sound humble is to express gratitude. When discussing who you are, what you achieved and what your strengths are, remember to mention who it was who helped you get there.

People you might be grateful for include: parents, teachers, siblings, friends, your country and mentors. Talk about how they were instrumental in your success. Maybe they were patient with you, presented opportunities for you, or forgave your mistakes.

It’s also good to make sure you don’t compare yourself to others. It’s not a good idea to say “I achieved better than anyone else.” Focussing on how you worked hard for your achievements is enough: there’s no need to talk about how you’re better or the best. Focus on the effort you put in, not the fact that you’re better than anyone.

To learn more about tricks on being humble, I recommend this good summary of ways to be humble from Forbes.

13. Describe your Personality Type

Here’s another interesting way of approaching the essay.

If you’re struggling to explain yourself, you can take a quiz that tells you what your personality type is. Something really nice about these quizzes is they not only give you words to explain what your personality type is, but they also give you some ideas to talk about.

Here’s a few good personality type quizzes:

• 16 Personalities : This quiz decides which personality you are from 16 types, such as debater, entrepreneur, adventurer and entertainer. I got the ‘Advocate’ meaning I am driven by “idealism and morality” and am mainly an introvert. What are you? Share in the comments below!
• Learning Styles : This quiz finds out how you learn. Are you the sort of person who learns in solitude or with others? Are you an introvert or extrovert? Another alternative is the VARK quiz which sees which sort of category of learner you are: Visual, Auditory (sound), Read/Write, or Kinesthetic (using your body).
• Career Quiz : This quiz asks you a range of personality questions to give you ideas about what you want to talk about. Then, it’ll suggest the ideal career for you based on your personality!

14. Include Details you’d put on a CV

You want your essay to tell a story about yourself.

But you also need to include hard, solid details.

So once you’ve told your story of yourself, go through your CV (or ‘resume’) and see what else you can include. Can you include details about your strengths that you have listed on your CV?

Maybe you can also include points about your previous jobs or education achievements that you have listed on your CV.

This will help back up your story with hard evidence.

You might also find out that there are a lot of details on your CV that will give you story ideas. You might not think you’ve achieved remarkable things until you look at your CV and reflect on the hard work you put into each of the jobs or achievements you have listed there.

15. Describe your Physical Attributes

Another thing you can weave into your story is an outline of what you look like!

It’s one of the first things you read about someone in any story.

Here’s how Mr. and Mrs. Dursley in Harry Potter is introduced:

“Mr Dursley was the director of a firm called Grunnings, which made drills. He was a big, beefy man with hardly any neck, although he did have a very large moustache. Mrs Dursley was thin and blonde and had nearly twice the usual amount of neck, which came in very useful as she spent spent so much of her time craning over garden fences, spying on the neighbours.”

How would you describe your physical attributes? Remember not to be negative about yourself, but you could describe yourself as tall, short, stocky, or lanky. How about your hair? Is it frizzy or straight, long or short?

16. Explain who is your Biggest influence and Why

The person who is your biggest influence would reveal a lot about who you are. Are you influenced by someone because of their power and strength, or wisdom and insight? Are you influenced by people for their nobility and patriotism, or their sense of adventure?

This will show your reader what makes you tick.

One of my big influences is Alex Honnold. He is a famous rock climber. What does that reveal about me? Well, it shows that I admire adventurous people and people who follow unconventional careers.

Who is your biggest influence? What does this reveal about you? Can you weave this into your essay about yourself?

17. Conclude by Returning to your Opening Hook

In this article I’ve shared with you a ton of ideas that you can use for your essay about yourself.

No matter which idea you select, I recommend including this last tip.

You should start your essay with an interesting ‘hook’ or anecdote about yourself.

I recommend concluding your essay by returning to this opening hook. We call this the ‘closing the loop’ method. You can start it something like this:

“I began this essay by telling the story of how I’m inspired by my father. I want to return to this point, as it’s the most important point in this essay. All of the points in this essay about myself have highlighted how I’m driven and motivated to live up to his amazing example. I have discussed…”

…And then you’d sum up what you discussed!

I outline the exact process of how to conclude an essay using this ‘closing the loop’ method in this post on how to write great conclusions .

• Chris Drew (PhD) https://helpfulprofessor.com/author/chris-drew-phd/ 101 Class Group Name Ideas (for School Students)
• Chris Drew (PhD) https://helpfulprofessor.com/author/chris-drew-phd/ 19 Top Cognitive Psychology Theories (Explained)
• Chris Drew (PhD) https://helpfulprofessor.com/author/chris-drew-phd/ 119 Bloom’s Taxonomy Examples
• Chris Drew (PhD) https://helpfulprofessor.com/author/chris-drew-phd/ All 6 Levels of Understanding (on Bloom’s Taxonomy)

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How to Write About Yourself

Last Updated: July 31, 2023 Fact Checked

This article was co-authored by Lucy Yeh . Lucy Yeh is a Human Resources Director, Recruiter, and Certified Life Coach (CLC) with over 20 years of experience. With a training background with Coaching for Life and Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) at InsightLA, Lucy has worked with professionals of all levels to improve the quality of their careers, personal/professional relationships, self marketing, and life balance. There are 13 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 5,710,444 times.

Whether you're writing an essay about yourself for a scholarship, a self-introduction, or a personal bio for a job application, coming up with the right words to capture what makes you unique can feel challenging. Fortunately, there are tips and tricks that can make writing about yourself a breeze. Want some help getting across just how impressive, interesting, and skilled you really are? Keep reading to learn everything you need to know about putting yourself into words effectively, complete with examples.

Writing of the Autobiographical Nature

• Who are you?
• What is your background?
• What are your interests?
• What are your talents?
• What are your achievements?
• What challenges have you faced?

• What is your most interesting or unique quality? What word(s) describes you the best? Choose that topic.

• Bad: I like sports.
• Ok: I'm a fan of basketball, football, tennis, and soccer.
• Good: My favorite sport is football, both to watch and to play.
• Better: When I was growing up, I would watch Big Ten football with my dad and brothers every Saturday, before we'd go outside and toss the football around. I've loved it ever since.

• Braggy: I'm the best and most dynamic worker at my company right now, so you should want to hire me for my talents.
• Humble: I was lucky enough to be awarded three employee of the month awards at my current job. Turns out it was a company record.

Writing Personal Essays for School

• Common themes or prompts for autobiographical essays include overcoming obstacles, great successes or spectacular failures, and what you learned about yourself.

• Depending on the assignment, you may need to connect a personal anecdote to a reading or an idea from class. Start brainstorming topics that are connected to that idea, to give yourself a variety of options to choose from.

• Common autobiographical essay cliches include sports stories, mission trips, and dead grandmothers. While these can all make for excellent essays if done well, it is difficult to stand out when telling the story of how your lacrosse team lost a big game, then practiced hard, then won. It has been written before.

• If you want to tell the story of your nasty break-up, start with the break-up, do not start with the star-crossed way you met. You have got to get immediately to the tension in the story.

• When you have an idea of your topic, start writing a "memory list" of specific things that you remember about the event. What was the weather like? What did it smell like? What did your mother say to you?
• Your opening paragraph will set the tone for the rest of the essay. Rather than telling the dull biographical details (your name, your place of birth, your favorite food), find a way to express the essence of the story you are going to tell and the themes you are going to explore in your essay.

Writing a Cover Letter for an Application

• Outline your qualifications and highlight your talents in a cover letter.
• Write about who you are.
• In a cover letter, describe how your education and experience qualifies you for this position.
• Explain how this opportunity will benefit your career goals.

• When in doubt, keep it brief and serious. If you are unsure whether or not telling an amusing anecdote about your friend's bachelor party is appropriate in a cover letter, it is probably best to leave it out.

• "I'm writing to apply for the entry-level position with Company Inc. advertised on your website. I think my experience and training makes me an ideal candidate for this position."
• Contrary to popular belief, it is not necessary to include your name in the body of the letter: "My name is John Smith and I am applying...." Your name will be included in the signature , as well as the header of a cover letter, so there is no need to put it in the text itself.

• Who you are and where you come from.
• Where you want to go.
• How this opportunity would potentially help you get there.

• Be as specific as possible. It is alright to note that you are "A passionate leader in all walks of life" but it would be much better to write about an example of a time you lead in a surprising way.
• Stay focused on skills and talents that connect specifically to the thing you are applying for. Extracurricular involvement, leadership roles, and other types of outstanding achievement may be important to you personally, but it may be totally extraneous. If you include something, ensure to connect it specifically to the goal of the cover letter.

• Be as specific as possible. If you are writing a university cover letter, it is obvious that you have to have a degree to get a job as a doctor, but how did you come to choose this field? Why did you choose this school? What, specifically, do you want to take away from the experience?

• Be careful about using a cover letter to critique a business. It is not the time to describe the suffering of a particular brand over the previous fiscal quarter, then promising that you will be able to turn it around with your ideas. That might not go over well if you are hired, and then you are unable to live up to the promise.

• Even if it is impressive, a high GPA or class ranking does not belong in a cover letter. Highlight it on your resume, but do not include it in two different places of the application.

• Mailing address
• Telephone and/or fax number

Expert Trick : Save time and effort by creating one generic format that you can use for many different job applications by tweaking the specific content for each one. Start with a general introductory paragraph , then a section or two fleshing out your resume and expertise as it relates to the job, and finish it off with a closing paragraph and a note of thanks.

Writing a Short Biography Note

• Pretend you are writing about someone else. Write your name and start describing that person like a character or a friend: "John Smith is the Executive Vice President of Company Inc..."

• If you are a jack of all trades, say so. Do not be afraid to list "actor, musician, mother, motivational speaker, and professional rock climber" if they all apply equally.

• It is common to list degrees that you have received. Pay particular attention to anything that ties into the work you are writing about. If you have special training, include it here.

• "John Smith is the Executive Vice President of Company Inc., in charge of marketing and overseas acquisitions. He received an MBA with distinction from Harvard and lives in Montauk with his cat Cheeto."
• Do not overshare. It can seem funny to immediately start with "John Smith loves rafting and hates eating Cheetos. He's a total boss" and such bio notes can be appropriate for some venues, however be careful to avoid awkward oversharing. Telling everyone about your killer hangover might be best left for after work talk.

• Stephen King, who is one of the most successful and popular authors in recent history, has a bio note that just lists the name of his family members, his hometown, and his pets. Consider leaving out the self-congratulation entirely.

Community Q&A

• Remember that you’re supposed to talk about yourself, it’s the main topic. Don’t talk about your friends or family, even though you may feel tempted to. Thanks Helpful 2 Not Helpful 0
• If you are having a difficult time writing about yourself, search online for examples of personal writing, in order to get some ideas and inspiration. Thanks Helpful 3 Not Helpful 0
• Don't think about how others feel about you. Everyone thinks from a different perspective. Thanks Helpful 3 Not Helpful 0

You Might Also Like

• ↑ https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/resumes-cover-letters/how-to-write-about-yourself
• ↑ https://writingcenter.unc.edu/tips-and-tools/brainstorming/
• ↑ https://ohiostate.pressbooks.pub/choosingsources/chapter/narrowing-a-topic/
• ↑ https://www.yourdictionary.com/articles/essay-about-self-writing
• ↑ https://writingcommons.org/article/using-first-person-in-an-academic-essay-when-is-it-okay/
• ↑ https://www.glassdoor.com/blog/6-unconventional-ways-start-cover-letter/
• ↑ https://english.washington.edu/writing-cover-letter
• ↑ https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/career-goal-statement-examples
• ↑ https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/resumes-cover-letters/resume-vs-cover-letter
• ↑ https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/resumes-cover-letters/whats-the-ideal-cover-letter-length
• ↑ https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/resumes-cover-letters/how-to-format-a-cover-letter-example
• ↑ https://writingcenter.uagc.edu/first-vs-third-person
• ↑ https://www.grammarly.com/blog/how-to-write-bio/

About This Article

If you have to write an autobiographical description of yourself, write down a list of your talents, interests, and accomplishments. Use this list to help you choose one specific topic for your description, such as your academic achievements or your leadership qualities. Use specific, unique details to support your topic, such as being awarded an academic scholarship or the fact that you were president of the newspaper in high school. You can list bits of your personal life, but be careful not to overshare. If you want to write about yourself a cover letter or personal essay, keep reading the article! Did this summary help you? Yes No

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How to write an about myself essay with example.

• Chloe Daniel
• Published On: July 09 ,2021

Getting Started

When you may have to write about yourself.

• Career advancement opportunities
• Internship inquiry letters
• Biographies
• Graduate school applications
• Cover letters
• Grant proposals

How to Write an Essay About Myself?

• Introduce yourself.
• Make sure to include your most important professional experience.
• Talk about significant awards or personal achievements.
• Introduce details about your personal life.
• Use a friendly and casual tone unless stated otherwise. 

What Else Do You Need to Include in Your Self Introduction Essay? 

• The things you want to learn.
• Your aspirations and dreams.
• The things you are good at.
• Your hobbies.

A Sample About Myself Essay

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• Interview Preparation /

Introduction Paragraph for an Essay About Yourself

• Updated on  
• Dec 5, 2023

The “ Write about yourself” is a common essay topic. It is a frequent topic in school assignments, college, and even some entrance exams. This gives an analysis to the examiner or teacher about your writing skills. They also get to know about your interests, academic background, and hobbies. In this article, we will cover how to write a captivating self-introduction in an essay about yourself.  

This Blog Includes:

Key elements of my self intro paragraph  , draft beforehand , hooks are key in essay, introduce yourself , mention your talent and qualities , mention your success story, proofreading is important, essay about myself sample.

Also Read: Essay on Forests for Students in 500 Words

The most important thing in a self-introduction essay is to decide what to include in your content. To help you with this, we have mentioned below the key elements that you should include in an informative essay. 

• Your name 
• Your educational background 
• Your current profession 
• Your interests and hobbies
• A big achievement 
• A challenging incident 
• Your future goals

How to Write an Essay About Myself 

Writing an essay about yourself doesn’t mean giving every detail of ourselves. We should be mindful of what we are writing, and check whether it is relevant to state that fact or not. Here are some tips to help you write a professional and interesting self-introduction essay. 

To write a self-introduction with all relevant information in proper order, you need to prepare beforehand. You need to prepare a structure and collect all the information that has to be included in that structure. 

Starting your essay with an interesting line or question will grab the attention of your readers. Always remember, an essay that begins well always ends well. Mention something interesting that will help to hold the interest of your readers. For example ‘I’m Shrey, but you can call me S.’

When you begin to introduce yourself, don’t get confused about what details to mention. Just assume as if you are introducing yourself to a stranger who knows nothing about you. Mention your name, education qualifications, and your current job role. 

Don’t mention something as your hobby just because it sounds great. Your essay will only be appealing to read if you are authentic and original. Mention your true hobbies, and professional skills and if you think it’s very common and making your essay dull, you can state why you like it so much, or how has it impacted your life or profession. If it’s somewhere related to your profession that’s why you took this career path. 

Must Read: Viva Self Introduction: Tips and Tricks

Mentioning your passion or interests isn’t enough. You can tell a tale to show how much you like it, for example, you can say that you have won this many dance competitions or choreographed for your college fest. You can also tell a story about your biggest achievement that makes you feel proud. You can share an incident that was challenging for you and how you overcame it.  This will give clarity to your personality and make your essay more exciting to read. 

For a quality essay, only content is not important you need to make sure that your paragraph is free of grammar and spelling mistakes. While proofreading make sure the order of your essay is making sense and the sentence structure sounds good while reading. 

It’s always easy to understand through an example and samples. We have given a sample below for your reference that will help you to get more clarity. 

“My name is XYZ and I’m a psychologist by profession. In the most basic words, I assist others in discovering their strength. I’ve spent my life learning human behaviour and helping people overcome their barriers; and in this process each time I have learned something new. My job has brought me all around the world and allowed me to work with individuals from every sphere of life.

I graduated from XYZ University, Noida where I was appointed as the life coach for my active listening and problem-solving skills. My profession doesn’t award me much with materialistic things but it’s fulfilling to see someone living his/her life happily after I helped them to overcome their issues and barriers.”

Related Articles

In an Essay about myself, you should stick to the information related to you only. You should not mention things like political interests, relationship status or more.

An Ideal essay length is about 350 to 400 words. Similarly, go with myself introduction essay. Shorter than this length is not good enough.

Yes, you can share a life incident in your self-introduction paragraph that is around your biggest accomplishment or a challenging incident. 

While you are writing a self-introduction paragraph make sure you are being original and true. Everyone is unique and that must be highlighted in your essay. Hope the information provided above is useful for the readers. 

For more information on such related topics to level up your interview preparations, visit our  interview preparation  page. Check out our  career counselling  blogs and follow  Leverage edu.

Alivia Mukherjee

Alivia is an associate content writer at Leverage Edu. She specializes in writing blogs on Indian Exams, Scholarships and study abroad topics. She can be found writing, designing and developing great content which are SEO focused.

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Home — Essay Samples — Life — Myself — About Myself

Essay Examples About Myself

Engaging prompts for your essay about myself.

Prompt 1: Describe a moment in your life that significantly influenced your personal development. How did it shape the person you are today?

Prompt 2: What are your major achievements, and why do you consider them as such? Discuss what these achievements reveal about your character and values.

Prompt 3: Reflect on a challenge you've faced. How did you overcome it, and what did you learn about yourself in the process?

Brainstorming and Choosing a Unique Essay About Myself Topic

Brainstorming is crucial for uncovering unique aspects of your story. Reflect on memorable experiences, achievements, and lessons learned to find a central theme or unique angle for your essay.

Unique Essay Topics Beyond the Common Narratives

• The Intersection of Personal Adversity and Academic Pursuit
• From Hobby to Purpose
• Cultural Heritage and Identity
• Innovation in Solitude
• Navigating the World as a Neurodiverse Individual

Inspirational Writing Samples for Your Essay About Myself

"Facing the mountain, I felt an unprecedented mix of fear and exhilaration. Climbing had always been a metaphor for my life's challenges. Each step upward mirrored my journey of overcoming [specific challenge], teaching me resilience, focus, and the importance of trust. Through this experience, I discovered that perseverance, even in the face of uncertainty, is the key to surmounting obstacles."

Phrases for Inspiration:

• "Transforming setbacks into comebacks, I learned..."
• "In the crucible of [experience], I forged..."
• "Navigating the intricate tapestry of [situation] revealed to me..."
• "The confluence of [event] and my response to it underscored the importance of..."
• "Drawing from the well of my experiences, I find strength in..."

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Admission to the university of adelaide: describe your background, answer on the large-scale question 'who am i', the way my curiosity defines myself and my desires, understanding myself: exploring the layers of my personality, that's how my personality defines myself, who am i: a glimpse of my personality development, one day i'll be someone's first choice, analysis of my top-5 personal strengths, self-awareness: my experience on path to better me, analysis of a teenager's personality profile, a look at the benefit of personal encouragement, who am i: answering the question through the body theory, memory theory, and illusion theory, a reflection on myself as a writer, the analysis of my personality tests, personal writing: why i love winter, personal narrative: myself as a writer, the analysis of my relationships with the roommate, influence on our individuality and personal development, the struggles of a substance abusing immigrant in the united states, relevant topics.

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Your chance of acceptance, your chancing factors, extracurriculars, how to write a 'tell us about yourself' essay.

Hey folks, one of the college applications I'm working on requires me to write an essay about myself. Can anyone share some tips, techniques, or sample essays to help me get started? I'm finding it a bit difficult to know where to begin. Thanks!

Hey there! Writing an essay about yourself can indeed be a bit challenging. I can give you some pointers to help you get started on crafting a compelling essay.

1. Brainstorm your standout qualities or experiences: Start by thinking about what sets you apart from others. It could be your interests, your background, your achievements, or your unique perspectives. Make a list of these qualities, as these can serve as the building blocks of your essay.

2. Begin with an anecdote or a hook: An engaging way to start your essay is with a brief narrative or an intriguing statement that captures the reader's attention. This can be a story from your life or an interesting fact about yourself. For instance, you could discuss how you developed a rare hobby or how your upbringing in a unique environment has shaped your worldview.

3. Focus on a central theme: It's important to have a central theme or message that ties your essay together. Your theme could be anything from personal growth to the value of community. Once you identify your theme, make sure to use your standout qualities and experiences to support and exemplify it throughout the essay.

4. Show, don't tell: Use vivid details and concrete examples to demonstrate your points, rather than just stating them. By painting a clear picture of your experiences and feelings, you allow the reader to truly understand your perspective and connect with your story.

5. Reflect on your experiences: Show the reader how your experiences have shaped you as a person. Self-reflection is an important element, as it demonstrates personal growth and self-awareness. For example, you might connect your interest in environmentalism to how it has made you more conscious of your own living habits and choices.

6. End on a strong note: Wrap up your essay with a memorable closing statement that reinforces your main theme. This could be a summary of your experiences or a statement of how you plan to apply the lessons you've learned to your future endeavors.

7. Edit and revise: Once you've written your essay, be sure to read it over multiple times to polish the language, check for grammar mistakes, and ensure that it flows smoothly. Getting feedback from friends or family can also be helpful to identify areas that need improvement.

Remember to stay genuine throughout your essay and let your authentic voice shine through. Your essay should reflect who you are and give the reader a sense of your personality and character. Good luck with your application!

About CollegeVine’s Expert FAQ

CollegeVine’s Q&A seeks to offer informed perspectives on commonly asked admissions questions. Every answer is refined and validated by our team of admissions experts to ensure it resonates with trusted knowledge in the field.

Detail from Female Artist (1910) by Ernst Ludwig Kirchner. Courtesy the Brücke Museum, Berlin

Me versus myself

I work against myself through procrastination, distraction and addiction. why do i consistently sabotage my own life.

by Eliane Glaser   + BIO

Some years ago, I sat in a BBC boardroom facing a panel of senior editors interviewing me for a promotion. After treading water in a junior role for years, I wanted the job more than anything. One of the editors asked me a question about teamwork but, as I reached for my anecdote and started to speak, something strange began to happen inside my head. A song started to play on repeat. The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and round. I’d sung the song to my children as toddlers. But now its cheery tones were an exacting demand. I chanted it in my head – round and round, round and round – feeling compelled to grind my teeth together in time. I also needed to blink.

I wasn’t fully aware of doing this extra hidden work as I recounted my story of the late guest and the impatient presenter: just vaguely conscious that telling it felt really hard, like trying to have an in-depth conversation in a nightclub. Meanwhile, the tyrannical one-man band in my head kept on going. I was determined the panel should see none of it. But then I found myself blinking madly and caught the head of department eyeing me. I was rumbled.

Over the years, my obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) has manifested in a panoply of painful and punitive habits. Scraping my tongue over my teeth, performing complex eye movements, peeling the skin off my lips until they bleed. It’s worse when the stakes are high: when I am trying to do something prestigious, or with someone I want to please. It’s also bad when I’m trying merely to exist in the moment. Also, when I’m trying to let go and have fun. My OCD is insidious and shape shifting, evading conscious awareness or control. It seems to have a will of its own. Except that, of course, it is a part of me.

OCD is only one of the ways in which I work against myself. I am a procrastinator. When writing, I constantly break my focus by scrolling, and I experience an urge to check email when I want to spend quality time with my children. I am also an addict. Not a pathological addict, but a normalised everyday addict. I’m hooked on screens (though I don’t own a smartphone) and use alcohol to switch off in the evenings (though I drink less than the recommended weekly allowance). I’m addicted to producing and achieving, too; to ticking things off to-do lists, to busyness, to filling every second – even as I crave time and space to reflect.

Procrastination, distraction, addiction and OCD are all forms of self-sabotage. It is a curious fact of life that we harm ourselves, even when times are hard; even when we need all the help we can get.

Self-sabotage takes many forms. If you’re anything like me, you will mess things up when you’re put on the spot, blanking when asked a question in public or blurting idiotic lines when you’re out to impress. If you’ve made space in your day to do something you really want, you too might find yourself frittering away those precious hours on life admin and social media. Perhaps you’ve criticised a long-suffering partner about stupid, trivial things, to the point you worry they may actually pack up and leave. Or you criticise yourself endlessly, so it actually stops you making progress. Self-sabotage is about deferring our stated goals and – when we are given a shot – blowing it, or subtly hindering our chances. The puzzle is why so many of us perpetually find ourselves getting in our own way and disrupting our best-laid plans.

I n the Phaedrus , Plato uses the metaphor of a chariot to describe how the human psyche is divided in two. The charioteer is guiding two winged horses, one light and one dark. The light horse symbolises our high moral intentions. The dark horse refuses to obey the whip. The light horse pulls the chariot upwards towards truth, beauty and wisdom. The dark horse is irrational and undermining, pulling the chariot down to earth.

This model of a split self has echoed through history, in the work of thinkers as diverse as Friedrich Nietzsche and the psychiatrist R D Laing. In recent years, neuroscience has come to dominate the field of human psychology; and it has some useful things to say about why we subvert our own ‘better self’. Tobias Hauser, professor of computational psychiatry at University College London, leads a project to investigate what is going on in the brains of people with OCD, identifying, for example, imbalances in those neurotransmitters that prevent the brain from regulating intrusive thoughts.

Pattern-forming behaviours are also in play. When I spoke online with Piers Steel, a leading expert in the science of motivation at the University of Calgary in Canada, he took me on a dizzying screen-share tour of software he’s designed to collate the existing research on procrastination (including fMRI studies that observe the process in the brain) in order to identify underlying patterns. This meta-analysis reveals that the biggest drivers are impulsive pleasure-seeking behaviours, and the delay of procrastination itself, which renders completing something offputtingly distant. ‘What makes procrastination particularly interesting is that it’s an irrational delay,’ Steel said (although, as I’ll suggest later, there may be a silver lining to forms of apparent self-sabotage such as procrastination). ‘We do it despite knowing we’ll be worse off. We know we want to do something, but when we look inside ourselves for the motivation, it evaporates. And we wonder what is wrong with me; why can’t I do this?’

Most of us are addicted to instant gratification, even if we are not ‘classifiable’ as addicts

Addiction arguably occupies the sharp end of procrastination. It is a perplexing phenomenon that’s been explored by the philosopher of mind Gabriel Segal, who favours an approach grounded in cognitive science, albeit with nods to Stoicism and Zen Buddhism. ‘There’s a good neurological theory of addiction now,’ Segal told me: ‘it’s called incentive sensitisation of the dopamine system.’ Normally, a rewarding experience produces a dopamine spike that leads us to desire another reward; in addicts, this desire becomes a craving. ‘That’s the fundamental way in which addiction relates to self-sabotage,’ Segal said. ‘You’re intending to do something, but then you feel you need to do this other thing first. It’s like becoming very hungry. You drop everything else and get food. And if that becomes a dominant feature of your life, you just end up sabotaging everything.’

The psychiatrist Anna Lembke believes that most of us are addicted to instant gratification, even if we are not ‘classifiable’ as addicts. Lembke, professor of psychiatry at Stanford University in California, a specialist in addiction and the author of Dopamine Nation (2021), told me that whenever we do something pleasurable we get a hit of dopamine, followed by the brain’s counter-response, which is to reset dopamine levels back to the baseline; but in order to do that, the brain overshoots in a downward direction, putting us in a ‘dopamine deficit state’. That’s the danger zone, ‘the state of real urgency or craving’, Lembke told me, and ‘we’ll do a lot of work – broadly defined as how much the organism is willing to sacrifice to get to a certain goal – to bring ourselves back to that homeostatic baseline.’

‘Addicts often behave in ways that are quite destructive to their own purposes: health, wellbeing, jobs and relationships,’ said Segal, like the alcoholic who has a job interview, but gets drunk and doesn’t turn up. ‘Humans generally – and addicts in particular – have different sub-characters inside them,’ Segal continued. ‘So there could be an element of sabotaging the mature person who wants a job, but serving the purpose of the inner teenager who wants to go out and have fun.’

The anxiety of achievement felt by many self-saboteurs is especially acute for addicts. Another interpretation of the job interview debacle is that the addict fears success. ‘If you succeed, then you come under threat – other people want to throw rocks at you; knock you off your pedestal,’ Segal said. ‘You may be aware that, if you succeed, somebody else fails as a result, and you don’t want other people to be upset. If success brings power, you might be afraid of what you would do with the power.’

Self-sabotage – particularly its common manifestations in addiction, eating disorders and self-harm – raises complex questions about the extent to which we are in control of ourselves and our lives. ‘Addiction is a spectrum disorder, from mild to moderate to severe,’ Lembke told me. ‘Along that continuum, there is a gradual increase in loss of agency and self-determination.’ Classifying self-sabotage as a malady beyond the hard border of ‘the normal’ means we avoid thinking about these grey areas of choice and control: territory that psychoanalysis has traditionally been happy to inhabit.

For Anouchka Grose, a psychoanalyst and author who has brought her specialism to bear on such topics as fashion , vegetarianism and eco-anxiety , this tolerance of ambiguity is precisely what makes Sigmund Freud’s work ‘radical’: ‘There isn’t a boundary between the normal and the pathological,’ says Grose, ‘and I think that’s a good way of thinking about it. We really don’t know how these things are going to play out in our lives.’ I ask her about the articulation of Freud’s aim, turning neurotic misery into normal unhappiness, and Grose reads it ironically: ‘I suppose, in a way, the reason that’s a kind of joke is because the slippage between one state and the other is so discreet: it’s not like you would ever know.’

I believe that the mechanical explanations of self-sabotage – neural pathways and dopamine responses – get us only so far. They are physical descriptions of psychological patterns and processes that can be explained in more profound terms: namely, the terms of psychoanalysis. Where neuroscience seems to demand that we overcome ourselves, psychoanalysis suggests we develop a more accommodating and nuanced understanding of our split selves and contradictions. To take it down to basics, we engage in self-sabotaging behaviours because at some level it feels like they are helping. My OCD is a kind of coping mechanism. Slumping in front of a screen or drinking wine on a dry day is a respite from self-flagellating productivity. Snow days, train strikes and pandemic lockdowns allow us to let ourselves off the hook with impunity, even as we feel thwarted.

Freud thought that we are governed by two opposing instincts. There is the pleasure principle, associated with life and creativity, and the death drive, which is the impulse to return to an inert state. ‘We’re all after a kind of homeostasis,’ says Grose, ‘and excitement has to be managed very carefully … not doing things is actually quite comfortable, except that it tips to the point where not doing things becomes morbid and deathly.’ A healthy balance, in other words, must be maintained between the two impulses: as Grose put it with down-to-earth wit: ‘You have to live, you have to act … and you also have to flop.’

Self-sabotage becomes problematic only when the death drive is too dominant. Fear of failure, for example, can overpower our ambitions. So we put obstacles in our own path in order to keep the painful reality of our imperfection at bay – not preparing well for those job interviews or public appearances, or behaving erratically. What the psychoanalyst Ronald Fairbairn in 1952 called our ‘internal saboteur’ tries to protect us from shame. But it does so at a high cost, foreclosing the possibility of novel, creative and authentic experiences, perhaps even hope. Grose believes that the advice to ‘get out of your comfort zone’ is really a reminder to resist the death drive and engage with life: ‘don’t procrastinate, actually do this thing, even though it’s awful. Write your book, even though you might fail.’ Although we think we want to do well, this comes with the risk of inciting envy in others that might rebound upon us, becoming ‘a profound source of comeuppance’, the psychoanalyst Josh Cohen told me during a conversation full of humorous exasperation at these inhibitions: ‘The subtext is, What am I doing enjoying myself at this moment? Who do you think you are!? ’

The interruption is a form of self-sabotage, but it also expresses a need for connection and validation

If we have omnipotent tendencies that overinflate our sense of our own destructive capabilities, we may scupper our chances of happiness or fulfilment to defuse the possibility of harming those around us. Even if we just have thoughts and feelings towards loved ones that make us feel bad (including what the family therapist Terrence Real calls ‘normal marital hatred’), we can turn that aggression on ourselves, which stops us having to properly own those impulses. Freud called this internal judge and jury the superego, and what should be a necessary system of checks and balances can become tyrannical.

Carl Jung came up with another useful concept to add to our saboteur’s toolkit: the shadow self. The shadow self is the parts of ourselves that we label undesirable, or that we think society will reject: unmet needs, say, or aggressive impulses. We split off these parts, but they revolt against us powerfully and unpredictably, as erratic outbursts, mental blocks or physical ailments that compromise our plans. ‘When an inner situation is not made conscious,’ wrote Jung in Aion (1951), ‘it happens outside, as fate.’ An example is the worker who constantly distracts herself with social media. The interruption is a form of self-sabotage, but it also expresses a need for connection and validation that she has repressed as invalid, and which emerges with redoubled force in those procrastinatory habits.

Jacques Lacan described the paradox that, while we fear failure, success may provoke more anxiety. The ‘curse of the lottery’ strikes when winning millions generates unexpected discontent; or think of the man who, all his working life, looks forward to retirement, but experiences a crisis when the structure of his day job is removed. I’ve felt a minor version of this when I’ve gone on a long-awaited holiday and found myself fiddling; at a loose end, I snap at my family, and scroll British news headlines so I can catch up on domestic gloom. To paraphrase Oscar Wilde, there are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.

I f self-sabotage exists on a spectrum, the contemporary world – with its alluring screens and overwork culture – has made it far more prevalent. Forms of self-sabotaging behaviour previously classed as abnormal have become ubiquitous. There has been a 400 per cent increase in the number of British adults seeking a diagnosis for ADHD since 2020, according to Tony Lloyd of the ADHD Foundation. And, according to Steel, about 95 per cent of people admit to procrastinating at least some of the time. A growing number of young people ask for extenuating circumstances to complete the coursework for a degree they may ostensibly really enjoy. Universities are dealing with an entire system on the brink of logical absurdity and administrative collapse. Faced with collective self-sabotage in the form of climate change and an ever-more competitive jobs market, many young people appear to be turning the anxiety upon themselves, inducing a kind of paralysis. We should exercise caution when we link mental illness to ambient conditions such as geopolitics or the dominance of screens. But it’s also worth considering why self-sabotage is such a feature of modern life.

The big change is that diversions from our chosen path appear at every turn. The researchers I spoke to pointed to recent research on the impact of screen time , particularly social media . ‘We are hacking our own operating systems, and marketers have very quickly discovered how to exploit our impulsivity,’ Steel told me. ‘Procrastination is on the rise because there’s a trillion-dollar industry to get us to indulge in these smaller sooner temptations at the cost of our larger later dreams.’ The philosopher Harry Frankfurt in 1971 defined these as first-order and second-order desires. So, our first-order desire might be to look at Instagram, but the second-order desire might be to become an artist. We can only be said to have free will when our first- and second-order desires align. The stakes couldn’t be higher. As Steel says: ‘These are deep questions about what kind of society we want to live in, and we have not designed it to maximise human flourishing.’

It’s a double battle: the world offers opportunities for self-sabotage and raises our perfectionist expectations

Our screen addictions prevent us from accomplishing our higher goals, but they also prevent us from resting and living in the moment – something we are constantly told is good for us. ‘We don’t know how to relax anymore without digital media,’ said Lembke. ‘The way that we now relax is to take a break from our externally focused attention and then to mind-wander, facilitated by social media. But, in essence, when we’re doing that, we’re consuming a drug and so we’re not really allowing ourselves to return to a homeostatic baseline.’ We can neither properly get on with our work, nor truly sit still.

We are ‘nurtured in a competitive, individualistic atmosphere’, said Cohen. His interests are wide-ranging; he’s written about anger , how to live , being a loser , and he’s questioned whether we even possess a private life, while his book Not Working (2019) offers a critique of our workaholic culture. In the past, our sense of duty came from the superego: a hard taskmaster, but somehow contained. But, under capitalism, the compulsion comes from another Freudian concept, the ‘ego ideal’, which is more internal and insidious. ‘The ego ideal never says “you must”, it says “you can”,’ Cohen explained. ‘Under the gaze of our own perfection, our own punishing ideal, we’re always falling short.’

So we seem to be fighting a double battle: the contemporary world offers readily available opportunities for self-sabotage and it raises our perfectionist expectations, making distraction and addiction more tempting. As well as leading to overwork, the ego ideal makes us less good at our work, too: another downwards spiral. This state of mind is ‘performance wrecking’, says Cohen: ‘you lose conviction and confidence in yourself. The more you’re aware of falling behind, of not quite being at the level you’re supposed to be, the more it does something to your capacity to seamlessly produce.’

C an self-sabotage be reduced or eliminated? In order to think about what might help, we need to distinguish between the self-sabotage that is caused by the contemporary world, and that which is simply a part of us.

As far as the external world is concerned, Lembke takes an original and bracing approach, arguing that we need to ‘change the narrative’ away from the drive to experience pleasure to ‘a new form of asceticism’ that paradoxically will enable us to achieve what we are really after. When Lembke considers the problem of young people failing to launch themselves into the world, in a growing number of cases ‘it’s not that their lives are too hard. It’s that their lives are fundamentally too easy, and that with more friction they would find more purpose. With more purpose, they would be able to endure the pain of being alive. Because it would have at least some meaning for them.’ The way to do this, she argues, is to create ‘a world within a world where we insulate ourselves’ from these ‘highly reinforcing substances and behaviours’. Similarly, Steel has found that one remedy for procrastination is putting pleasures a little out of reach: ‘We need delays, and even small ones can be very effective.’

Beyond switching off the internet and taking cold showers, a first step in limiting our self-sabotaging tendencies is to recognise that we have them. In some ways, we’ve come a long way as a culture in appreciating that we don’t always act in our own best interests. Behavioural economists like Daniel Kahneman, Richard Thaler and Cass Sunstein have questioned the model of ‘homo economicus’, the rational, self-determining individual. They’ve documented how irrational we actually are: we neglect our pensions, stick with our overpriced insurance plans, and demolish mediocre takeaways on the sofa. The equivalent in political theory is false consciousness: as Thomas Frank puts it in What’s the Matter with Kansas (2004), it’s the conundrum of ‘working-class guys in midwestern cities cheering as they deliver up a landslide for a candidate whose policies will end their way of life, will transform their region into a “rustbelt”, will strike people like them blows from which they will never recover.’

Making sense of the deeper logics beneath what is dismissed as perverse can be the most effective remedy

In the mainstream conversation about ‘wellbeing’, however, self-sabotage can appear counterintuitive. The self-optimisation movement is driven to some extent by a recognition of the need to overcome bad habits, but its positivity (encapsulated by the injunction to live your best life) can downplay our feelings of being out of control and irrational, making us feel bad for being merely ‘normally unhappy’. Here it resembles the rhetoric of self-management that pervades popular discussions of neuroscience: the assumption that if it’s physical, it’s fixable. Psychoanalysis, by contrast, understands very well how and why we undercut our conscious intentions. Rather than eliminating these aspects of the self, psychoanalysis brings them into the light, where we can better understand them.

In fact, making sense of the deeper logics beneath what is dismissed as perverse can be the most effective remedy. OCD’s triggers may be genetic, but they are also contextual: perhaps you were made to feel, from an early age, that your natural emotions – especially rage, but also desires that felt underserved or risky – were poisonous. Such conditioning pops up like a self-appointed security guard, keeping that ‘shadow self’ toxicity channelled away inside. The bestselling popular psychiatrist Jeffrey M Schwartz, who champions our ability to rewire our neuroplastic brains, advocates a combination of conscious awareness (or mindfulness) of the compulsions, while thinking about why they occur – an approach that has certainly worked for me. Though it may look less empowering on the surface, I am reminded here of Melanie Klein’s belief in the need to replace our idealised self with our actual self, so we might reconcile ourselves to the difficult reality of our imperfection. We can defuse our deep-seated fear of envious revenge, for example, by seeing it as our own projection – a strategy that might have rescued my BBC interview.

Comprehension leads to self-compassion. Accepting the reality of self-sabotage loosens its grip. We need ‘to work with our symptom rather than “return to normal” or assume that there’s a sort of benchmark human,’ Grose told me. The task is ‘how to include your symptom in a life that you can live – and like.’

Perhaps, then, we don’t want to jettison our self-sabotaging tendencies altogether. Ironically, renowned analysts such as Freud and Jung deployed their own struggles with self-sabotage to spark innovative and creative breakthroughs – delving into their neurotic, maddening inability to work to help them understand these tendencies in us all. Jung had hallucinations and heard disturbing voices – documented in his fantastically illustrated masterwork, The Red Book – that were both debilitating and groundbreaking. Freud’s letters reveal that, around the age of 40, he faced the unbearable realisation that he would not be able to accomplish his life goal of explaining all human psychology in terms of the physical workings of the brain. He complained of ‘a feeling of depression’ that took the form of ‘visions of death … in place of the usual frenzy of activity’. He found he couldn’t stop smoking and was ‘completely incapable of working’, declaring that ‘in times like these my reluctance to write is downright pathological’. But then he had a revelation, and moved beyond this narrowly scientific project into an exploration of fantasies and dreams. ‘Symptoms, like dreams, are the fulfilment of a wish ,’ he wrote, realising that his neuroses have their own wishes. Only when he attends to them is he able to invent the discipline of psychoanalysis.

Self-sabotage may be debilitating, but it can also be a spur. Very often, it is the engine of productivity – and humour. There is something precious about the neurotic tangles that make many of our most relatable cultural figures who they are – I’m thinking of George Costanza in the TV show Seinfeld . ‘Lots of people who are very successful are on that boundary,’ Grose told me. ‘It’s a tight-rope act between being insane and brilliant.’ The best we can hope for, perhaps, is having people we can rely on to save us from ourselves. After all, it worked for Marcel Proust. ‘Proust was a total perfectionist, and drove his publisher mad,’ Grose said. ‘Left to his own devices, who knows what would have happened. But that was his process, and luckily, in his case it was possible for someone to step in and say: we’re going to press, right now. It’s time to stop!’

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The Morning

How to like yourself more.

Taking time to enumerate nice things about yourself each day may sound terminally conceited, but in practice the results can be pretty transformative.

By Melissa Kirsch

I want to be a person with practices. A yoga practice, a mindfulness practice, a gratitude practice. I’m not totally sure when a nourishing activity passes into the realm of a practice, but I think it has something to do with intention and devotion. You prioritize doing this thing that has a positive effect on you or others or on the world you live in — say, sitting in quiet contemplation for 20 minutes each morning, or journaling every night before bed. You commit to doing it on a regular basis, and after enough reps, it becomes part of who you are.

I’ve been hesitant to declare — to myself, never mind anyone else — that I’ve established any of the aforementioned practices because I’m skeptical of my ability to stick with them. I tend to burn hot in the initial phases of something that promises to improve my life, and then lose steam very quickly. I’ve done the first day of the “Yoga With Adriene” 30-day challenge at least 30 times.

One need not be so doctrinaire about one’s practices, I know. The point is to do and feel better, not to get a gold star. I’ve wandered away from many practices only to return to them, usually because I miss them, because seeing the benefits of doing something is often not as powerful as experiencing its absence. That’s the case with something I’ve been doing for the past eight months or so — not every single day, but enough days to tentatively call it “a thing I do,” if not a thoroughgoing practice.

At the end of the day, I try to write down as many things as I can think of that I appreciate about myself. It might be how I handled a difficult situation, or that I checked something off my to-do list that I’d been putting off. It might be something witty I said, or the way I reframed how I was thinking about a situation. Some days there’s not much content to work with, and I might just appreciate that I made the bed even though I really didn’t want to, or that my hair looked kind of good.

When someone first recommended I try this, I thought it sounded very self-involved, maybe a little pathetic — was my self-esteem so impoverished that I needed to ply myself with compliments? (It turns out that some days, in fact, I do.) But over time I realized that what at first seemed facile was actually sort of revolutionary.

I’d tried practicing gratitude before and found it quite effective. You take a few minutes to write down things you’re thankful for — the kindness of a stranger, the way your child looks at you while you’re reading a bedtime story, the smell of honeysuckle when you bike past that one tree. You remind yourself how lucky you are, that while you’ve been fretting or regretting or despairing, all these good things and people and possibilities are part of your story, too.

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