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Sentence Starters: Ultimate List to Improve Your Essays and Writing

Ashley Shaw

This blog post is going to be about … No. Too boring.

Today, I am going to talk to you about ... No. Too specific.

This is a blog post for all writers ... Nope. Too generic.

Has this ever been you while writing? I get it. Writing a good sentence can be hard, and when you have to string a whole lot of them together, the task can become daunting. So what do you do?

From the first sentence you write to the very last, you want each one to show your style and motivate your reader to keep reading. In this post, we are going to think about how you start your sentences.

What Is a Good Sentence Starter for an Essay Introduction?

What is a good sentence starter for a body paragraph, 25 useful transitions, can i repeat a sentence starter, how can i rephrase "in conclusion".

The first paragraph of a paper can make or break your grade. It is what gets your audience into the topic and sets the whole stage. Because of this, it is important to get your readers hooked early.

The first sentence of a paper is often called the hook. It shouldn’t be anything ordinary. It should have strong language and be a little surprising, with an interesting fact, story, statistic, or quote on the topic.

Because it is designed to pull the reader in and surprise them a little, it is often good to avoid pre-written sentence starter examples when writing your hook. Just get into it here, and worry about the flow later.

Here are some examples:

Spider webs were once used as bandages.

I taught myself to read when I was three. At least, that’s the story my parents tell.

Recent studies suggest that the average person lies at least once in every conversation.

“The world is bleeding and humans wield the knife,” or so says environmental scientist So Andso.

(P.S. Except for example 1, which is true, I just made all of these up to demonstrate my point. So, please don’t quote me on these!)

Once you jump right in with your hook, it is time to start working on ways to move sentences along. Here is where you may need some sentence starter examples.

In your first paragraph, you basically want to connect your hook to your thesis. You’ll do this with a few sentences setting up the stage for your topic and the claim you will make about it. To do that, follow the tips found in the next section on body paragraphs and general sentence starter tips.

Many of the tips I am about to discuss can be used anywhere in a paper, but they are especially helpful when writing body paragraphs.

Let’s start with one of the most important types of sentence starter in essay writing: transition words.

How Do I Use Transitions in an Essay?

If you want to start writing terrific sentences (and improve your essay structure ), the first thing you should do is start using transition words.

Transition words are those words or phrases that help connect thoughts and ideas. They move one sentence or paragraph into another, and they make things feel less abrupt.

The good thing about transition words is that you probably know a lot of them already and currently use them in your speech. Now, you just need to transition them into your writing. (See what I did there?)

Before we get into examples of what a good transition word is, let’s look at a paragraph without any transitions:

I went to the store. I bought bacon and eggs. I saw someone I knew. I said hello. I went to the cashier. They checked me out. I paid. I got my groceries. I went to my car. I returned home.

Yikes! That is some boring writing. It was painful to write, and I am sure it is even worse to read. There are two reasons for this:

• I start every sentence with the same word (more on this later)
• There are no signposts showing me how the ideas in the paragraph connect.

In an essay, you need to show how each of your ideas relate to each other to build your argument. If you just make a series of statements one after the other, you’re not showing your instructor that you actually understand those statements, or your topic.

How do we fix this? Transition words. Roughly 25% of your sentences should start with a transition word. If you can hit that number in your essay, you’ll know that you’ve made meaningful steps towards demonstrating your understanding.

Of course, hitting that number isn’t enough—those transitions need to be meaningful. Let’s look at the different types of transitions and how you can use them.

What Are Words Like First , Next , and Last Called?

You probably already use some transitions in your essays. For example, if you start a paragraph with firstly , you’ve used a transition word. But transitions can do so much more!

Here are 25 common transitional words and phrases that you could use in your essay:

• Additionally / In Addition
• Alternatively / Conversely
• As a result of
• At this time
• Consequently
• Contrary to
• First(ly), Second(ly), etc.
• In contrast
• Nonetheless
• On the other hand
• Particularly / In particular
• In other words

This list isn’t exhaustive, but it is a good start.

These words show different types of relationships between ideas. These relationships fall into four main categories: Emphasis , Contrast , Addition , and Order .

What Are Emphasis Transition Words?

These phrases are used when you want to highlight a point. Examples from my above list include clearly , particularly , and indeed . Want to see some more? Follow my bolded transitions: Undoubtedly , you understand now. It should be noted that you don’t need to worry.

How Do You Use Addition Transitions?

These words add on to what you just said. These are words like along with , moreover , and also . Here are some more: Not only are you going to be great at transitions after this, but you will also be good at writing sentences. Furthermore , everyone is excited to see what you have to say.

How Can I Use Transitions to Contrast Ideas?

This is the opposite of addition, and you use it when you want to show an alternative view or to compare things. Examples from my list include words like nonetheless , contrary to , and besides .

Here are some more: Unlike people who haven’t read this article, you are going to be really prepared to write great sentences. Even so , there is still a lot more about writing to learn.

How Do I Order Ideas in My Essay?

A good first step is using order transition words.

This set of transitions helps mark the passage of time or gives an order to events. From the list, think of things like first and finally . Now for some extras: At this time yesterday , you were worried about starting sentences. Following this , though, you will be an expert.

Now that you get the concept of transitions, let’s go back to that poorly written paragraph above and add some in to see what happens:

This morning , I went to the store. While I was there, I bought bacon and eggs. Then I saw someone I knew. So I said hello. After that , I went to the cashier. At that time , they checked me out. First , I paid. Next , I got my groceries. Following that , I went to my car. Finally , I returned home.

(Notice the use of commas after most of these transitions!)

This isn’t the best paragraph I’ve ever written. It still needs a lot of work. However, notice what a difference just adding transitions makes. This is something simple but effective you can start doing to make your sentences better today.

If you want to check your transition usage, try ProWritingAid’s Transitions report . You’ll see how many of each type of transition word you've used so you can pin-point where you might be losing your reader.

Sign up for a free ProWritingAid account to try it out.

What Are Some Linking Phrases I Can Use in My Essay?

As well as individual words, you can also use short phrases at the beginning of your sentences to transition between ideas. I just did it there— "As well as individual words" shows you how this section of the article is related to the last.

Here are some more phrases like this:

As shown in the example,

As a result of this,

After the meeting,

While this may be true,

Though researchers suggest X,

Before the war began,

Until we answer this question,

Since we cannot assume this to be true,

While some may claim Y,

Because we know that Z is true,

These short phrases are called dependent clauses . See how they all end with a comma? That's because they need you to add more information to make them into complete sentences.

• While some may claim that chocolate is bad for you, data from a recent study suggests that it may have untapped health benefits .
• Since we cannot assume that test conditions were consistent, it is impossible to reach a solid conclusion via this experiment .
• As a result of this, critics disagree as to the symbolism of the yellow car in The Great Gatsby .

The bolded text in each example could stand on its own as a complete sentence. However, if we take away the first part of each sentence, we lose our connection to the other ideas in the essay.

These phrases are called dependent clauses : they depend on you adding another statement to the sentence to complete them. When you use a sentence starter phrase like the ones above in your writing, you signal that the new idea you have introduced completes (or disrupts) the idea before it.

Note: While some very short dependent clauses don’t need a comma, most do. Since it is not wrong to use one on even short ones (depending on the style guide being used), it is a good idea to include one every time.

Along with missing transitions and repeating sentence structure, another thing that stops sentences from being great is too much repetition. Keep your sentences sharp and poignant by mixing up word choices to start your sentences.

You might start your sentence with a great word, but then you use that same word 17 sentences in a row. After the first couple, your sentences don’t sound as great. So, whether it is varying the transitional phrases you use or just mixing up the sentence openers in general, putting in some variety will only improve your sentences.

ProWritingAid lets you know if you’ve used the same word repeatedly at the start of your sentences so you can change it.

The Repeats Report also shows you all of the repeats in your document. If you've used a sentence starter and then repeated it a couple of paragraphs down, the report will highlight it for you.

Try the Repeats Report with a free ProWritingAid account.

Now that you have your introduction sentences and body sentences taken care of, let’s talk a little about conclusion sentences. While you will still use transitions and clauses as in the body, there are some special considerations here.

Your conclusion is what people will remember most after they finish reading your paper. So, you want to make it stand out. Don’t just repeat yourself; tell them what they should do with what you just told them!

Use the tips from above, but also remember the following:

Be unique. Not only should you vary the words you use to start different sentences, but you should also think outside of the box. If you use the same conclusion sentence starter everyone else is using, your ideas will blend in too.

Be natural. Some of the best writing out there is writing that sounds natural. This goes for academic writing, too. While you won’t use phrases like "at the end of the day" in essay writing, stilted phrases like "in conclusion" can disrupt the flow you’ve created earlier on.

Here are some alternatives to "in conclusion" you could use in an essay:

• To review, ... (best for scientific papers where you need to restate your key points before making your final statement)
• As has been shown, ...
• In the final analysis, ...
• Taking everything into account, ...
• On the whole, ...
• Generally speaking, ...

If you’re looking for more ways to rephrase "in conclusion," take a look at our complete list of synonyms you can use.

There may not be a set word or words that you can use to make your sentences perfect. However, when you start using these tips, you’ll start to see noticeable improvement in your writing.

If you’ve ever heard people talk about pacing and flow in academic writing, and you have no idea what they mean or how to improve yours, then this is your answer. These tips will help your writing sound more natural, which is how you help your ideas flow.

Take your writing to the next level:

20 Editing Tips from Professional Writers

Whether you are writing a novel, essay, article, or email, good writing is an essential part of communicating your ideas., this guide contains the 20 most important writing tips and techniques from a wide range of professional writers..

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Ashley Shaw is a former editor and marketer/current PhD student and teacher. When she isn't studying con artists for her dissertation, she's thinking of new ways to help college students better understand and love the writing process.

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Crafting Compelling Sentence Starters for Essays

Welcome to our comprehensive guide on mastering sentence starters for essays. Ever wondered how some writers effortlessly hook their readers from the first line, smoothly transition between ideas, and leave a lasting impression?

The secret lies in the artful use of sentence starters. These short phrases are more than just transition words; they're the key to making your paper engaging, coherent, and sophisticated.

In this blog post, we'll shed light on the importance of good sentence starters, provide examples, and guide you on how to use them effectively in different parts of your essay. Whether you're writing an introduction, body paragraph, or conclusion , we've got you covered. But that's not all.

We'll also delve into common mistakes to avoid when using sentence starters and how to adapt them for different types of essays. So, buckle up and get ready to elevate your essay writing skills to new heights. Let's get started!

Understanding the Importance of Good Sentence Starters

Whether you're crafting an academic text or writing a blog , the right sentence starter can make all the difference. It's not just about stringing words together; it's about choosing the right words that will hook the reader and keep them engaged. So, let's delve deeper into understanding the importance of good sentence starters and how they can elevate your writing.

Why Good Sentence Starters are Crucial for Your Writing

Good sentence starters are the backbone of compelling writing. They act as the gateway to your thoughts, guiding the reader through your narrative or argument. They're not just a fancy academic phrase or a tool to meet a word count. They're the key to making your writing flow, to connecting your ideas, and to keeping your reader engaged.

Imagine reading a text that jumps from one point to another without any clear transitions. It would be like trying to follow a map without any signposts. You'd likely get lost, frustrated, and give up. That's exactly what happens when you don't use sentence starters. Your readers can't follow your train of thought, and they lose interest.

When you use sentence starters effectively, you're laying out a clear path for your reader. You're telling them, "Pay attention, this is an important point," or "Here's a contrasting view," or "Let's move on to a new idea." You're hooking the reader, keeping them engaged, and making your writing more impactful.

Examples of Effective Sentence Starters

Here are some examples of effective sentence starters that can elevate your writing:

• "Despite the common belief, ..."
• "Drawing from the data, ..."
• "Contrary to what one might think, ..."
• "Given the circumstances, ..."
• "Taking into account the evidence, ..."
• "As a matter of fact, ..."
• "In light of recent events, ..."
• "Considering the implications, ..."
• "Reflecting on the situation, ..."
• "From a different perspective, ..."

These sentence starters are not just words or phrases; they are the hooks that grab your reader's attention. They are the bridges that connect your thoughts and ideas, making your academic text more coherent and engaging. So, the next time you sit down to write, pay close attention to your sentence starters. They might just be the key to taking your writing to the next level.

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Sentence Starters for Essay Introductions

In this section, we will explore how to use sentence starters effectively in essay introductions, providing you with practical tips and examples.

How to Use Sentence Starters in Essay Introductions

The art of crafting an engaging essay introduction lies in the strategic use of sentence starters. These are not just any random words, but carefully chosen transition words, short phrases, or clauses that guide the reader into the narrative. They serve as a bridge, connecting the title to the body of the essay, and setting the tone for what's to come.

To use a sentence starter effectively, you need to understand its purpose. It's not just about starting a sentence; it's about creating a smooth transition that guides the reader from one idea to the next. It's about shedding light on the purpose of your research, and preparing the reader for the arguments you're about to present.

The goal is to make your paper as readable and engaging as possible. So, don't overuse sentence starters. Use them sparingly, and only when necessary to enhance the clarity and coherence of your essay.

Examples of Sentence Starters for Essay Introductions

Here are some examples of sentence starters that can be used in essay introductions:

• "The purpose of this research is to..."
• "This essay will shed light on..."
• "In answer to the top question..."
• "To paraphrase the research findings..."
• "The essay introduction starters are designed to..."
• "Using a sentence starter, we can..."
• "With the use of transition words, we can..."
• "A short phrase can make your paper more engaging..."
• "Here's a starter example to illustrate..."
• "This sentence starter example will clarify..."

These starters not only grab the reader's attention but also provide a clear roadmap for the essay. They can be used to introduce a new argument, create a smooth transition between paragraphs, or emphasize key ideas. Remember, the goal is to make your writing more compelling and engaging for the reader.

Sentence Starters for Body Paragraphs

Understanding how to use these paragraph starters effectively is crucial in crafting a well-structured essay. They not only introduce new ideas but also create a seamless connection between the previous and the upcoming content.

How to Use Sentence Starters in Body Paragraphs

In essay writing, sentence starters for essays are the secret sauce that adds flavor to your content. They are the transition phrases that guide your reader from one idea to the next, ensuring a smooth journey through your thoughts. When it comes to body paragraphs, these starters play a pivotal role in maintaining the flow and coherence of your essay.

A good paragraph starter doesn't just introduce the next idea, it also ties in with the previous one. It's a bridge that connects the two, making your paper feel like a cohesive whole rather than a collection of disjointed thoughts. So, when you start a body paragraph, consider the content of the previous one and choose a transition that will smoothly carry your reader forward.

Sentence Starters for Essay Conclusions

Wrapping up an essay or research paper with a strong conclusion is just as important as having a compelling introduction. The conclusion is your final chance to leave a lasting impression on your reader, and using the right sentence starters can make all the difference.

These conclusion sentence starters not only help you summarize your findings but also add a touch of sophistication to your writing. They serve as a bridge, connecting your final thoughts and the main body of your work, ensuring a smooth transition that enhances the overall readability of your paper.

Whether you're looking to paraphrase research findings or shed light on the broader implications of your work, the right sentence starter can help you achieve your goal. So, let's delve into the art of using sentence starters for essay conclusions.

How to Use Sentence Starters in Essay Conclusions

When it comes to wrapping up your research paper or essay, the use of conclusion sentence starters can be a game-changer. These short phrases or transition words can help you summarize your findings, restate your thesis, and leave a lasting impression on your reader.

The key to using these sentence starters effectively is to use them sparingly. Overuse can make your paper sound repetitive and unprofessional. Instead, use them to introduce a new idea or to transition smoothly between thoughts.

Another effective way to use a sentence starter is to highlight something important. A well-placed sentence starter can draw the reader's attention to a key point or finding in your research.

Examples of Sentence Starters for Essay Conclusions

Here are some examples of conclusion sentence starters that can be used to wrap up your research paper or essay:

• "In conclusion, it is evident that..." This starter is a classic way to summarize your findings. For instance, "In conclusion, it is evident that the purpose of this research was to shed light on the effects of climate change."
• "Based on the findings, it can be concluded that..." This phrase is perfect for emphasizing the results of your research. For example, "Based on the findings, it can be concluded that regular exercise contributes to improved mental health."
• "Overall, this research sheds light on..." This sentence starter is great for highlighting the broader implications of your work. For instance, "Overall, this research sheds light on the importance of early intervention in education."

The use of a sentence starter or transition word can make your paper more coherent and impactful.

Sentence Starters for Different Types of Essays

Let's explore the specifics of using sentence starters in different types of essays. Whether you're crafting an argumentative, descriptive, or narrative essay, we'll provide you with a starter example to shed light on how to make your paper more compelling. Let's dive in!

Sentence Starters for Argumentative Essays

• "Despite the prevailing belief, I argue that..."
• "The evidence strongly suggests that..."
• "To shed light on this issue, consider the following..."
• "The purpose of this research is to challenge the notion that..."
• "One cannot ignore the fact that..."
• "Drawing upon the data, it becomes clear that..."
• "This argument is further strengthened by the fact that..."
• "In response to this argument, one might assert that..."
• "The crux of the matter is that..."
• "This line of reasoning leads us to conclude that..."
• "In the face of such compelling evidence, it is hard to dispute that..."

Sentence Starters for Descriptive Essays

Here are some sentence starters that can be effectively used in descriptive essays:

• "As I stepped into the room, ..."
• "The first thing that caught my eye was ..."
• "I was immediately struck by ..."
• "The sight that greeted me was ..."
• "I couldn't help but notice ..."
• "The aroma of ... filled the air."
• "The sound of ... echoed in the distance."
• "The taste of ... lingered on my tongue."
• "The touch of ... sent shivers down my spine."
• "The feeling of ... was overwhelming."

These sentence starters can help you set the scene and engage your reader's senses right from the start. Remember, the purpose of a descriptive essay is to paint a vivid picture in the reader's mind. Using these sentence starters can help you achieve that.

Sentence Starters for Narrative Essays

• Setting the Scene : "The sun was setting, casting long shadows across the park as children's laughter echoed in the distance..."
• Introducing a Character : "Meet John, a man of few words but with a story that could fill volumes..."
• Creating Suspense : "As she turned the corner, her heart pounded in her chest, not knowing what she would find..."
• Describing an Event : "The concert was a whirlwind of lights, music, and energy that swept everyone off their feet..."
• Presenting Dialogue : "'I've never seen anything like it,' he whispered, his eyes wide with awe and wonder..."
• Sharing an Inner Thought : "She couldn't help but wonder if this was the right decision, if she was on the right path..."
• Ending with a Cliffhanger : "As the door slowly creaked open, he braced himself for what was to come..."

Common Mistakes to Avoid When Using Sentence Starters

It's not just about knowing a variety of good sentence starters, but also about knowing when and how to use them to hook the reader and emphasize important points. Let's explore these common mistakes and learn how to avoid them.

Overusing the Same Sentence Starters

One of the most common pitfalls when using sentence starters is overusing the same phrase or word. It's like a song on repeat; after a while, it loses its charm. This is especially true in academic texts, where the goal is to hook the reader and keep them engaged.

A good sentence starter can be a great way to introduce a new idea or point. However, if you use the same starter example repeatedly, it can make your writing sound monotonous and uninteresting. It's important to pay attention to this as it can detract from the important points you're trying to make.

Remember, variety is the spice of life, and this holds true for sentence starters as well. Mixing up your sentence starters not only makes your writing more engaging but also helps to maintain the reader's interest.

So, the next time you write, be mindful of the sentence starters you use. Try to incorporate different ones to keep your writing fresh and engaging. This is a great way to ensure that your writing is always at its best.

Using Inappropriate Sentence Starters

One of the most common mistakes that writers make is using inappropriate sentence starters. This usually happens when the writer is not fully aware of the context or the tone of the text. For instance, using a casual sentence starter in an academic text can disrupt the flow and confuse the reader.

It's important to pay attention to the type of text you're writing. If it's an academic paper, using academic phrases as sentence starters is a great way to maintain the formal tone. On the other hand, if you're writing a blog post or a novel, you might want to use more casual or creative sentence starters to hook the reader.

Another important point to remember is that not all sentence starters are suitable for all types of sentences. For example, using a contrasting sentence starter in a sentence that's supposed to add information can lead to misunderstandings.

Final Thoughts on Mastering Sentence Starters for Essays

Mastering the use of sentence starters is a crucial skill for any writer. These transition words and phrases serve as bridges, guiding your reader through your thoughts and arguments. They not only enhance the flow and coherence of your writing but also hook the reader's attention, making your work more engaging and compelling.

However, remember that the effective use of sentence starters requires balance.

Overuse can lead to redundancy, while inappropriate use can confuse your reader. Therefore, it's essential to understand the context and purpose of each sentence starter to use it appropriately.

In the end, the art of using sentence starters is about making your paper more readable and persuasive. So, keep practicing, and soon, you'll find that these handy tools have become an integral part of your writing toolkit.

If you need professional writing help , try Strategically AI for free today.

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Sentence Starters: Definition, Rules and Remarkable Examples

Sentence starters, also known as transition words or phrases, are vital tools for essay writing. They play a key role in formulating an interesting and well-written introduction, providing smooth transitions between sentences and paragraphs, and writing a proper conclusion that summarizes the main points covered. Sentence starters are one of the essential tools of a skilled writer.

Table of Contents

What Are Sentence Starters and Why Are They So Important?

The main function of sentence starters is to tie together words, sentences, and paragraphs in an essay so that the writing flows logically. The sentence starters will help the readers comprehend the content more easily and absorb the meaning. The writing will be well-organized and cohesive.

Reading an essay containing well-placed and thoughtful sentence starters will be much easier, more interesting, and far less tedious. Most readers will be comfortable reading the material and will understand the writer’s intent. Students who use sentence starters expertly can expect to receive higher grades on their essays and exams.

What Are Some Examples of Sentence Starters?

Sentence starters for introductions.

• This essay discusses…
• The definition of…
• In my opinion…
• A popular subject of debate lately has been…
• Until now, I believed…, then I found out that…
• Most people assume that…
• The most recent data suggests that…
• A popular topic for discussion recently has been…
• Recent headlines have shown…

Sentence Starters for Transitioning Between Sentences and Paragraphs

• In contrast,
• Furthermore,
• In addition,
• On the other hand ,
• Consequently,
• As a result,
• Additionally,
• Even though,

Examples of Sentence Starters Used in Sentences

In contrast , Representative Smith supported the new bill enthusiastically.

Moreover , data from a follow-up study found an even better outcome for patients who used this treatment.

Furthermore , other researchers had similar promising results.

Similarly , Dr. John Blake, Professor of Political Science at Stanford University, agreed with Dr. Johnson’s findings.

While the news was positive, experts were cautious about becoming overly optimistic at this point.

On the other hand , the lead engineer, Edward Boswell, disagreed with the proposed remodeling plans.

Although Rachel Turner was against the tentative schedule, she compromised with the rest of the committee .

Whereas Fairfield amended its town ordinance, Weston decided to postpone the action indefinitely.

Sentence Starters for Conclusions

• In summary,
• In closing,
• Ultimately,
• In the final analysis,
• In essence,
• All in all,

Examples of Sentence Starters in Conclusions

• In summary , this analysis shows promising possibilities for new treatments and better outcomes.
• In closing , there are substantive arguments on both sides of the issue. However, I believe that passing this legislation would be the best course of action.
• To sum up , there needs to be more extensive research on these proposals in order to make a sound decision.
• Ultimately , the voters will decide whether the downtown transformation is in the best interests of the city.
• In the final analysis , I believe that Morgan’s proposal is the most promising.
• In essence , Dr. Jackson is advocating for increased spending now which will compromise the town’s future goals.
• All in all , it seems that the proponents of the project have more evidence than does the opposition.

Sentence Starters | Infographic

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• 40 Useful Words and Phrases for Top-Notch Essays

To be truly brilliant, an essay needs to utilise the right language. You could make a great point, but if it’s not intelligently articulated, you almost needn’t have bothered.

Developing the language skills to build an argument and to write persuasively is crucial if you’re to write outstanding essays every time. In this article, we’re going to equip you with the words and phrases you need to write a top-notch essay, along with examples of how to utilise them.

It’s by no means an exhaustive list, and there will often be other ways of using the words and phrases we describe that we won’t have room to include, but there should be more than enough below to help you make an instant improvement to your essay-writing skills.

If you’re interested in developing your language and persuasive skills, Oxford Royale offers summer courses at its Oxford Summer School , Cambridge Summer School , London Summer School , San Francisco Summer School and Yale Summer School . You can study courses to learn english , prepare for careers in law , medicine , business , engineering and leadership.

General explaining

Let’s start by looking at language for general explanations of complex points.

1. In order to

Usage: “In order to” can be used to introduce an explanation for the purpose of an argument. Example: “In order to understand X, we need first to understand Y.”

2. In other words

Usage: Use “in other words” when you want to express something in a different way (more simply), to make it easier to understand, or to emphasise or expand on a point. Example: “Frogs are amphibians. In other words, they live on the land and in the water.”

3. To put it another way

Usage: This phrase is another way of saying “in other words”, and can be used in particularly complex points, when you feel that an alternative way of wording a problem may help the reader achieve a better understanding of its significance. Example: “Plants rely on photosynthesis. To put it another way, they will die without the sun.”

4. That is to say

Usage: “That is” and “that is to say” can be used to add further detail to your explanation, or to be more precise. Example: “Whales are mammals. That is to say, they must breathe air.”

5. To that end

Usage: Use “to that end” or “to this end” in a similar way to “in order to” or “so”. Example: “Zoologists have long sought to understand how animals communicate with each other. To that end, a new study has been launched that looks at elephant sounds and their possible meanings.”

Adding additional information to support a point

Students often make the mistake of using synonyms of “and” each time they want to add further information in support of a point they’re making, or to build an argument . Here are some cleverer ways of doing this.

6. Moreover

Usage: Employ “moreover” at the start of a sentence to add extra information in support of a point you’re making. Example: “Moreover, the results of a recent piece of research provide compelling evidence in support of…”

7. Furthermore

Usage:This is also generally used at the start of a sentence, to add extra information. Example: “Furthermore, there is evidence to suggest that…”

8. What’s more

Usage: This is used in the same way as “moreover” and “furthermore”. Example: “What’s more, this isn’t the only evidence that supports this hypothesis.”

9. Likewise

Usage: Use “likewise” when you want to talk about something that agrees with what you’ve just mentioned. Example: “Scholar A believes X. Likewise, Scholar B argues compellingly in favour of this point of view.”

10. Similarly

Usage: Use “similarly” in the same way as “likewise”. Example: “Audiences at the time reacted with shock to Beethoven’s new work, because it was very different to what they were used to. Similarly, we have a tendency to react with surprise to the unfamiliar.”

11. Another key thing to remember

Usage: Use the phrase “another key point to remember” or “another key fact to remember” to introduce additional facts without using the word “also”. Example: “As a Romantic, Blake was a proponent of a closer relationship between humans and nature. Another key point to remember is that Blake was writing during the Industrial Revolution, which had a major impact on the world around him.”

12. As well as

Usage: Use “as well as” instead of “also” or “and”. Example: “Scholar A argued that this was due to X, as well as Y.”

13. Not only… but also

Usage: This wording is used to add an extra piece of information, often something that’s in some way more surprising or unexpected than the first piece of information. Example: “Not only did Edmund Hillary have the honour of being the first to reach the summit of Everest, but he was also appointed Knight Commander of the Order of the British Empire.”

14. Coupled with

Usage: Used when considering two or more arguments at a time. Example: “Coupled with the literary evidence, the statistics paint a compelling view of…”

15. Firstly, secondly, thirdly…

Usage: This can be used to structure an argument, presenting facts clearly one after the other. Example: “There are many points in support of this view. Firstly, X. Secondly, Y. And thirdly, Z.

16. Not to mention/to say nothing of

Usage: “Not to mention” and “to say nothing of” can be used to add extra information with a bit of emphasis. Example: “The war caused unprecedented suffering to millions of people, not to mention its impact on the country’s economy.”

Words and phrases for demonstrating contrast

When you’re developing an argument, you will often need to present contrasting or opposing opinions or evidence – “it could show this, but it could also show this”, or “X says this, but Y disagrees”. This section covers words you can use instead of the “but” in these examples, to make your writing sound more intelligent and interesting.

17. However

Usage: Use “however” to introduce a point that disagrees with what you’ve just said. Example: “Scholar A thinks this. However, Scholar B reached a different conclusion.”

18. On the other hand

Usage: Usage of this phrase includes introducing a contrasting interpretation of the same piece of evidence, a different piece of evidence that suggests something else, or an opposing opinion. Example: “The historical evidence appears to suggest a clear-cut situation. On the other hand, the archaeological evidence presents a somewhat less straightforward picture of what happened that day.”

19. Having said that

Usage: Used in a similar manner to “on the other hand” or “but”. Example: “The historians are unanimous in telling us X, an agreement that suggests that this version of events must be an accurate account. Having said that, the archaeology tells a different story.”

20. By contrast/in comparison

Usage: Use “by contrast” or “in comparison” when you’re comparing and contrasting pieces of evidence. Example: “Scholar A’s opinion, then, is based on insufficient evidence. By contrast, Scholar B’s opinion seems more plausible.”

21. Then again

Usage: Use this to cast doubt on an assertion. Example: “Writer A asserts that this was the reason for what happened. Then again, it’s possible that he was being paid to say this.”

22. That said

Usage: This is used in the same way as “then again”. Example: “The evidence ostensibly appears to point to this conclusion. That said, much of the evidence is unreliable at best.”

Usage: Use this when you want to introduce a contrasting idea. Example: “Much of scholarship has focused on this evidence. Yet not everyone agrees that this is the most important aspect of the situation.”

Adding a proviso or acknowledging reservations

Sometimes, you may need to acknowledge a shortfalling in a piece of evidence, or add a proviso. Here are some ways of doing so.

24. Despite this

Usage: Use “despite this” or “in spite of this” when you want to outline a point that stands regardless of a shortfalling in the evidence. Example: “The sample size was small, but the results were important despite this.”

25. With this in mind

Usage: Use this when you want your reader to consider a point in the knowledge of something else. Example: “We’ve seen that the methods used in the 19th century study did not always live up to the rigorous standards expected in scientific research today, which makes it difficult to draw definite conclusions. With this in mind, let’s look at a more recent study to see how the results compare.”

26. Provided that

Usage: This means “on condition that”. You can also say “providing that” or just “providing” to mean the same thing. Example: “We may use this as evidence to support our argument, provided that we bear in mind the limitations of the methods used to obtain it.”

27. In view of/in light of

Usage: These phrases are used when something has shed light on something else. Example: “In light of the evidence from the 2013 study, we have a better understanding of…”

28. Nonetheless

Usage: This is similar to “despite this”. Example: “The study had its limitations, but it was nonetheless groundbreaking for its day.”

29. Nevertheless

Usage: This is the same as “nonetheless”. Example: “The study was flawed, but it was important nevertheless.”

30. Notwithstanding

Usage: This is another way of saying “nonetheless”. Example: “Notwithstanding the limitations of the methodology used, it was an important study in the development of how we view the workings of the human mind.”

Giving examples

Good essays always back up points with examples, but it’s going to get boring if you use the expression “for example” every time. Here are a couple of other ways of saying the same thing.

31. For instance

Example: “Some birds migrate to avoid harsher winter climates. Swallows, for instance, leave the UK in early winter and fly south…”

32. To give an illustration

Example: “To give an illustration of what I mean, let’s look at the case of…”

Signifying importance

When you want to demonstrate that a point is particularly important, there are several ways of highlighting it as such.

33. Significantly

Usage: Used to introduce a point that is loaded with meaning that might not be immediately apparent. Example: “Significantly, Tacitus omits to tell us the kind of gossip prevalent in Suetonius’ accounts of the same period.”

34. Notably

Usage: This can be used to mean “significantly” (as above), and it can also be used interchangeably with “in particular” (the example below demonstrates the first of these ways of using it). Example: “Actual figures are notably absent from Scholar A’s analysis.”

35. Importantly

Usage: Use “importantly” interchangeably with “significantly”. Example: “Importantly, Scholar A was being employed by X when he wrote this work, and was presumably therefore under pressure to portray the situation more favourably than he perhaps might otherwise have done.”

Summarising

You’ve almost made it to the end of the essay, but your work isn’t over yet. You need to end by wrapping up everything you’ve talked about, showing that you’ve considered the arguments on both sides and reached the most likely conclusion. Here are some words and phrases to help you.

36. In conclusion

Usage: Typically used to introduce the concluding paragraph or sentence of an essay, summarising what you’ve discussed in a broad overview. Example: “In conclusion, the evidence points almost exclusively to Argument A.”

37. Above all

Usage: Used to signify what you believe to be the most significant point, and the main takeaway from the essay. Example: “Above all, it seems pertinent to remember that…”

38. Persuasive

Usage: This is a useful word to use when summarising which argument you find most convincing. Example: “Scholar A’s point – that Constanze Mozart was motivated by financial gain – seems to me to be the most persuasive argument for her actions following Mozart’s death.”

39. Compelling

Usage: Use in the same way as “persuasive” above. Example: “The most compelling argument is presented by Scholar A.”

40. All things considered

Usage: This means “taking everything into account”. Example: “All things considered, it seems reasonable to assume that…”

How many of these words and phrases will you get into your next essay? And are any of your favourite essay terms missing from our list? Let us know in the comments below, or get in touch here to find out more about courses that can help you with your essays.

At Oxford Royale Academy, we offer a number of  summer school courses for young people who are keen to improve their essay writing skills. Click here to apply for one of our courses today, including law , business , medicine  and engineering .

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Useful Sentence Starters For Academic Writing

In academic writing, sentence starters play a vital role in organizing your ideas, conveying your arguments effectively, and maintaining a flow throughout your research paper. In this blog post, we will explore various sentence starters that can elevate the quality of your academic writing and provide examples tailored to research-based essays.

Why are sentence starters useful

Sentence starters are particularly helpful in introductions to grab the reader’s attention and provide a clear roadmap for the research essay. They can be employed when introducing a new argument or point, creating a smooth transition between paragraphs, or when emphasizing key ideas. Additionally, sentence starters are beneficial in conclusions to summarize key findings, restate the thesis, and leave a lasting impression on the reader.

Moreover, sentence starters are valuable in comparisons to highlight similarities or differences, in sequences or lists to provide a structured flow of ideas, and in elaboration to expand on points or introduce new evidence. They can also be used to express uncertainty or doubt when discussing conflicting perspectives or limitations in the research. Overall, sentence starters add coherence, clarity, and sophistication to academic writing, making it more compelling and engaging for the reader .

Introduction sentence starters for essays

These sentence starters introduce what the paragraph or entire text is about so the readers know what to expect. 

• “This study aims to…”

Example: This study aims to investigate the correlation between social media usage and mental health among teenagers.

• “In recent years, research has shown…”

Example: In recent years, research has shown a growing interest in the potential therapeutic benefits of mindfulness practices.

• “The purpose of this research is to…”

Example: The purpose of this research is to examine the impact of climate change on biodiversity in tropical rainforests.

Conclusion sentence starters

These sentence starters are helpful to hint at the reader that you’re about to wrap things up so they don’t expect any new points or evidence. 

• “In conclusion, it is evident that…”

Example: In conclusion, it is evident that the implementation of renewable energy sources is crucial for mitigating the effects of global warming.

• “Based on the findings, it can be concluded that…”

Example: Based on the findings, it can be concluded that regular exercise contributes to improved cognitive function in older adults.

• “Overall, this research sheds light on…”

Example: Overall, this research sheds light on the importance of early intervention programs for children with learning disabilities.

Good sentence starters for comparisons

These sentence starters show that two things are related or alike. 

• “Similarly,…”

Example: Similarly, both studies observed a significant decrease in cholesterol levels among participants who followed a Mediterranean diet.

• “In contrast to…”

Example: In contrast to previous research, this study found no significant relationship between caffeine consumption and sleep disturbances.

• “Like X, Y also…”

Example: Like previous studies, this research also highlights the impact of air pollution on respiratory health.

Good sentence starters for sequences or lists

Sentence starters for sequences are used to begin or relate lists of instructions or explaining a series of events. 

• “ Firstly, …”

Example: Firstly, the survey gathered demographic information from participants.

• “ Secondly, …”

Example: Secondly, the data analysis involved statistical techniques to identify patterns and trends.

• “Finally, …”

Example: Finally, the study proposed recommendations for future research in this field.

Good sentence starters for elaboration or adding new points

These sentence starters ease the transition from explaining the larger picture to showing examples of minute details. 

• “ Moreover, …”

Example: Moreover, this research emphasizes the importance of incorporating ethical considerations in clinical trials.

• “Additionally, …”

Example: Additionally, previous studies have identified socioeconomic factors as influential determinants of educational attainment.

• “Furthermore, …”

Example: Furthermore, the research findings highlight the need for more extensive sample sizes to draw generalizable conclusions.

Good sentence starters to show uncertainty or doubt

These sentence starters help in explaining to the reader that there is an upcoming contrasting idea or thought.

• “ Although the results suggest…”

Example: Although the results suggest a positive correlation, further investigation is warranted to establish a causal relationship.

• “It is plausible that…”

Example: It is plausible that the observed variations in results could be attributed to differences in sample demographics.

• “It remains unclear whether…”

Example: It remains unclear whether the observed changes in behavior are transient or long-lasting.

In conclusion, sentence starters serve as valuable tools in academic writing, enabling you to structure your thoughts, enhance clarity, and guide readers through your research essays. Use them in abundance yet carefully, as they can enhance your quality of writing significantly.

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How to Write a Descriptive Paragraph About a Person (With Examples)

4-minute read

• 7th January 2023

Describing a person or character is difficult for even the most successful authors. It requires a balance of words to make sure they shine through without the language being too heavy. In this article, we’ll look at how to write a descriptive paragraph about a person, share some examples, and talk about different strategies.

1.   Brainstorm Your Ideas

Brainstorming is crucial to any writing process. It’s the process in which you think of ideas for what you’d like to write about. In this case, you’re writing a descriptive paragraph about a person. It’s important to use adjectives to describe the features or characteristics you want to focus on.

One way to come up with ideas for a descriptive paragraph about a person is to go through the five senses. Use the questions below to get some ideas for what you want to highlight about your person.

Appeal to your reader’s senses – smell, taste, sound, sight, and touch

Smell: How does the person smell? Do they wear perfume? Are they doing an activity that would make them have a certain smell?

Taste: Do you associate a certain food with this person? Does it make you think of a specific taste? Can you taste something due to a certain smell they have?

Sound: Do they have a unique voice or laugh? Are they doing an activity that has distinctive sounds?

Sight: What prominent features do they have? For example, think about their dressing style, their smile, or their surroundings. What do you see them doing in your mind when you see a photo of them? What memories do you have of this person? Does this person remind you of something or someone?

Touch: What textures do you see? For example, imagine their skin or clothing. How does it feel if you hug them?

2.   Begin With a Short and Snappy Sentence

Like with any type of writing, you want to hook your reader so that they want to continue reading. In this case, you can use a topic sentence, if appropriate, to introduce your reader to the person. For example:

Or, if you want to be more creative, you can reel them in with a short and snappy sentence about this person. This is called a writing hook . This sentence should focus on a stand-out detail or characteristic about the person you’re describing. For example:

3.   Describe the Person

Now, this is the hard part. But, if you’ve brainstormed plenty of ideas and know which ones you want to focus on, it will be easier. Let’s look at some examples to get a better idea of how to write a descriptive paragraph about a person using the prompt “describe a person you admire.”

Comments: This paragraph is pretty typical of most students. It gives lots of visual details of the person and uses a simile or two (“ Her eyes are like the color of honey” and “Her smile shines like the sun” ). While this strategy gets the job done, it’s not very exciting to read. In fact, it can be quite boring!

Let’s look at how we can rewrite this to make it more exciting.

Find this useful?

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Comments: In this example, we focused on one defining characteristic of the person we are describing — her laugh. This strategy places more focus on the person you’re describing, rather than the adjectives you use to describe them.

4.   Edit and Revise

After you write your descriptive paragraph, be sure to read it over. Read it out loud. Read it in a funny voice. Doing this will help you to hear the words and identify which parts do not work or sound awkward.

5.   General Tips for Descriptive Writing

●  Avoid using too many descriptive words.

●  Remember to show the reader, not tell.

●  Appeal to the reader’s five senses – smell, touch, taste, sight, and sound.

●  Focus on a striking or defining characteristic.

●  Use contrasting details from other people or surroundings for emphasis.

●  Use literary devices (metaphors, similes etc.) sparingly and with intention.

●  Use a hook to reel your reader in.

●  Use a variety of short and long sentences.

●  Practice creative writing exercises to improve your descriptive writing skills.

●  Always edit and revise your writing.

If you need more help with writing a descriptive paragraph or essay , send your work to us! Our experts will proofread your first 500 words for free !

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Sentence Starters: Useful Words and Phrases You Can Use As Sentence Starters

Posted on Last updated: October 24, 2023

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Sentence Starters! Here you will find a useful list of common sentence starters that you can use in a discussion as well as in essay writing. Learn these sentence starters to improve your English speaking and writing skills.

Table of Contents

Sentence Starters

Sentence starters | common phrases.

• (The topic) has fostered a debate on …
• A sensible idea would be to…
• We all know that…
• It is said that…
• It is believed that…
• People assumed that…
• There is growing support for the notion that …
• The data gathered in the study strongly suggests that …
• The supposition drawn from this being that…
• Leading to the supposition that…
• This can be argued that..
• The source suggest…
• My own feeling on the subject is that …
• Generally speaking…
• As far as I know…
• As far as I am concerned…
• I believe that…
• The focus of discussion in this paper is …
• The premise of (the topic) seems to be based on …
• Latest research corroborates the view that …
• Most people would agree that…
• It is estimated…
• The reader supposed that…
• It is clear that…
• Everybody knows that…
• Surely you would agree that…
• This clearly shows that…
• I discovered…
• We always…
• This indicates…
• Demonstrating that…
• It is vital that…
• It wouldn’t be very difficult to…
• The real truth is that…
• Are we expected that…
• The fact is that…
• I felt as…
• I think/ I believe that…
• It seems to me that…
• We concluded that…
• My perspective is…
• I agree with…
• Have you thought about…
• In other words…
• I see what you mean but…
• I share your point of view on…
• In my opinion…

Transition Words Used as Sentence Starters

Words to add an idea

• In addition to
• For instance
• For example
• As an example
• Additionally
• Furthermore
• Another reason
• Coupled with
• Correspondingly
• In addition
• Identically
• One other thing

Words that show cause

• Accordingly
• As a result
• Consequently
• For this reason
• For this purpose
• Subsequently
• This is why
• Following this
• As you can see
• For all of those reasons

Words that show contrast

• Comparatively
• Different from
• Even though
• However ( however synonyms )
• In comparison
• Nevertheless
• In contrast
• On the one hand…
• On the other hand
• On the contrary

Words that add emphasis

• Generally speaking
• For the most part
• In this situation
• No doubt (undoubtedly)
• Particularly
• Unquestionably

Sentence Starters | Infographic

ALIYI Ahmad

Sunday 30th of April 2023

This great gift thank you forever

Wednesday 7th of December 2022

thank that helped m out alot

Thursday 1st of December 2022

Amazing list. It helps change up how you start your sentence, and it helps for writers to keep readers engaged.

Friday 27th of May 2022

so i think that there should be more expansion so we can tell the reader a bit more about what is happening

Wednesday 6th of April 2022

i like his book

Academic Phrasebank

Introducing work.

• GENERAL LANGUAGE FUNCTIONS
• Being cautious
• Being critical
• Classifying and listing
• Compare and contrast
• Defining terms
• Describing trends
• Describing quantities
• Explaining causality
• Giving examples
• Signalling transition
• Writing about the past

There are many ways to introduce an academic essay or short paper. Most academic writers, however, appear to do one or more of the following in their introductions:

• establish the context, background and/or importance of the topic
• present an issue, problem, or controversy in the field of study
• define the topic and/or key terms used in the paper
• state the purpose of the essay or short paper
• provide an overview of the coverage and/or structure of the writing

Slightly less complex introductions may simply inform the reader: what the topic is, why it is important, and how the writing is organised. In very short assignments, it is not uncommon for a writer to commence simply by stating the purpose of their writing.

Introductions to research dissertations and theses tend to be relatively short compared to the other sections of the text but quite complex in terms of their functional elements. Some of the more common elements include:

• establishing the context, background and/or importance of the topic
• giving a brief review of the relevant academic literature
• identifying a problem, controversy or a knowledge gap in the field of study
• stating the aim(s) of the research and the research questions or hypotheses
• providing a synopsis of the research design and method(s)
• explaining the significance or value of the study
• defining certain key terms
• providing an overview of the dissertation or report structure

Examples of phrases which are commonly employed to realise these functions can be seen by clicking on the headings listed below. Note that there may be a certain amount of overlap between some of the categories under which the phrases are listed. Also, the order in which the different categories of phrases are shown reflects a typical order but this is far from fixed or rigid, and not all the elements are present in all introductions.

A number of analysts have identified common patterns in the introductions of research articles. One of the best known patterns is the CARS model (create a research space) first described by John Swales (1990). This model, which utilises an ecological metaphor, has, in its simplest form, three elements or moves:

• Establishing the territory (establishing importance of the topic, reviewing previous work)
• Identifying a niche (indicating a gap in knowledge)
• Occupying the niche (listing purpose of new research, listing questions, stating the value of the work, indicating the structure of the writing)

Establishing the importance of the topic for the world or society

X is a major contributor to … X plays a critical role in the maintenance of … Xs have emerged as powerful platforms for … X is essential for a wide range of technologies. X can play an important role in addressing the issue of … There is evidence that X plays a pivotal role in regulating … In the new global economy, X has become a central issue for … Evidence suggests that X is among the most important factors for … Xs are one of the most widely used groups of antibacterial agents and … There is a growing body of literature that recognises the importance of … X is an important component in the climate system, and plays a key role in Y. Xs are one of the most widely used groups of Y and have been extensively used for …

Establishing the importance of the topic for the discipline

X is of interest because … X is a classic problem in … X is an important aspect of … X is a fundamental property of … X is an increasingly important area in … The concepts of X and Y are central to … X is at the heart of our understanding of … Investigating X is a continuing concern within … X is a major area of interest within the field of … X has been an object of research since the 1960s. X has been the subject of many classic studies in … X has been instrumental in our understanding of … The theory of X provides a useful account of how … Central to the entire discipline of X is the concept of … The issue of X has received considerable critical attention. X has long been a question of great interest in a wide range of fields.

Establishing the importance of the topic (time frame given)

Recently, there has been renewed interest in … Traditionally, Xs have subscribed to the belief that … One of the most important events of the 1970s was … In recent years, there has been an increasing interest in … Recent developments in X have heightened the need for … The last two decades have seen a growing trend towards … Recently, researchers have shown an increased interest in … Recent trends in X have led to a proliferation of studies that … Over the past century, there has been a dramatic increase in … The past decade has seen the rapid development of X in many … Since it was reported in 2015, X has been attracting considerable interest. Recent developments in the field of X have led to a renewed interest in … The past thirty years have seen increasingly rapid advances in the field of …

Establishing the importance of the topic as a problem to be addressed

X is a major problem in … Of particular concern is … One of the main obstacles … One of the greatest challenges … A key issue is the safe disposal of … The main disadvantage of X is that … X impacts negatively upon a range of … It is now well established that X can impair … X has led to the decline in the population of … The main challenge faced by many researchers is the … Lack of X has existed as a health problem for many years. Xs are one of the most rapidly declining groups of insects in … Exposure to X has been shown to be related to adverse effects in … There is an urgent need to address the safety problems caused by …

Referring to previous work to establish what is already known

Recent evidence suggests that … Extensive research has shown that … Studies of X show the importance of … It has previously been observed that … Several attempts have been made to … Previous research has established that … Data from several studies suggest that … Recent research comparing X and Y has found … The existing body of research on X suggests that … There is a growing body of literature that recognises … Several theories on the origin of X have been proposed. Existing research recognises the critical role played by … It is now well established from a variety of studies, that … Recently investigators have examined the effects of X on Y. Surveys such as that conducted by Smith (2015) have shown that … Factors found to be influencing X have been explored in several studies. A number of cross-sectional studies suggest an association between X and Y… Studies over the past two decades have provided important information on …

Identifying a controversy within the field of study

A much debated question is whether … One major issue in early X research concerned … To date there has been little agreement on what … The issue has grown in importance in light of recent … One of the most significant current discussions in X is … In the literature on X, the relative importance of Y is debated. One observer has already drawn attention to the paradox in … Questions have been raised about the use of animal subjects in … In many Xs, a debate is taking place between Ys and Zs concerning … Debate continues about the best strategies for the management of … This concept has recently been challenged by X studies demonstrating … The debate about X has gained fresh prominence with many arguing that … Scholars have long debated the impact of X on the creation and diffusion of … More recently, literature has emerged that offers contradictory findings about … One major theoretical issue that has dominated the field for many years concerns … The controversy about scientific evidence for X has raged unabated for over a century. The issue of X has been a controversial and much disputed subject within the field of … The causes of X have been the subject of intense debate within the scientific community. In the literature on X, the relative importance of Y has been subject to considerable discussion.

Explaining the inadequacies of previous studies

Previous studies of X have not dealt with … Researchers have not treated X in much detail. Such expositions are unsatisfactory because they … Most studies in the field of X have only focused on … Such approaches, however, have failed to address … Previous published studies are limited to local surveys. Half of the studies evaluated failed to specify whether … The research to date has tended to focus on X rather than Y. Previously published studies on the effect of X are not consistent. Smith’s analysis does not take account of …, nor does she examine … The existing accounts fail to resolve the contradiction between X and Y. Most studies in X have only been carried out in a small number of areas.

However, much of the research up to now has been descriptive in nature … The generalisability of much published research on this issue is problematic. Research on the subject has been mostly restricted to limited comparisons of … However, few writers have been able to draw on any systematic research into … Short-term studies such as these do not necessarily show subtle changes over time … Although extensive research has been carried out on X, no single study exists which … However, these results were based upon data from over 30 years ago and it is unclear if … The experimental data are rather controversial, and there is no general agreement about …

Identifying the paucity or lack of previous research

There is little published data on … No previous study has investigated X. The use of X has not been investigated. Data about the efficacy and safety of X are limited. Up to now, far too little attention has been paid to … A search of the literature revealed few studies which … The impact of X on Y is understudied, particularly for … Few studies have investigated X in any systematic way … In addition, no research has been found that surveyed … So far, very little attention has been paid to the role of X. Surprisingly, the effects of X have not been closely examined. In contrast to X, there is much less information about effects of … A systematic understanding of how X contributes to Y is still lacking. Despite the importance of X, there remains a paucity of evidence on … To date, the problem has received scant attention in the research literature.

Identifying a knowledge gap in the field of study

It is still not known whether … … much less is known about X. The nature of X remains unclear. Currently, there are no data on … What is less clear is the nature of … Very little is currently known about X in … Research to date has not yet determined … What is not yet clear is the impact of X on … There is still uncertainty, however, whether … The response of X to Y is not fully understood. Causal factors leading to X remain speculative. The neurobiological basis of X is poorly understood. Little is known about X and it is not clear what factors … To date, only a limited number of Xs have been identified. The mechanisms that underpin X are not fully understood. Much uncertainty still exists about the relationship between … This indicates a need to understand the various perceptions of X that exist among … It is now well established that … However, the influence of X on Y has remained unclear.

Stating the focus, aim, or argument of a short paper

In this paper, I argue that … This paper attempts to show that … The central thesis of this paper is that … In the pages that follow, it will be argued that … In this essay, I attempt to defend the view that … The aim of this essay is to explore the relationship between … The purpose of this paper is to review recent research into the …

Stating the purpose of the current research

The specific objective of this study was to … An objective of this study was to investigate … This thesis will examine the way in which the … This study set out to investigate the usefulness of … This dissertation seeks to explain the development of … This case study seeks to examine the changing nature of … The objectives of this research are to determine whether … This prospective study was designed to investigate the use of … This research examines the emerging role of X in the context of … This study systematically reviews the data for…, aiming to provide … Drawing upon two strands of research into X, this study attempts to … This thesis intends to determine the extent to which … and whether … This dissertation aims to unravel some of the mysteries surrounding … This study therefore set out to assess the effect of X …, and the effect of … The main aim of this study is to investigate the differences between X and Y. Part of the aim of this project is to develop software that is compatible with … There are two primary aims of this study: 1. To investigate … 2. To ascertain … This study seeks to obtain data which will help to address these research gaps. One purpose of this study was to assess the extent to which these factors were … The purpose of this investigation is to explore the relationship between X and Y.

Describing the research design and the methods used

Data for this study were collected using … Five works will be examined, all of which … This investigation takes the form of a case-study of the … This study was exploratory and interpretative in nature. This study uses a qualitative case study approach to investigate … The research data in this thesis is drawn from four main sources: … The approach to empirical research adopted for this study was one of … This dissertation follows a case-study design, with in-depth analysis of … By employing qualitative modes of enquiry, I attempt to illuminate the … Qualitative and quantitative research designs were adopted to provide … Both qualitative and quantitative methods were used in this investigation. A holistic approach is utilised, integrating X, Y and Z material to establish … The study was conducted in the form of a survey, with data being gathered via … The methodological approach taken in this study is a mixed methodology based on … A combination of quantitative and qualitative approaches was used in the data analysis.

Explaining the significance of the current study

This is the first study to … This study provides new insights into … This work will generate fresh insight into … The study offers some important insights into … Understanding the link between X and Y will help … This is the first study to undertake a longitudinal analysis of … The present research explores, for the first time, the effects of … The importance and originality of this study are that it explores … The findings should make an important contribution to the field of …. Characterisation of X is important for our increased understanding of … It is hoped that this research will contribute to a deeper understanding of … This study aims to contribute to this growing area of research by exploring … This project provided an important opportunity to advance the understanding of … Therefore, this study makes a major contribution to research on X by demonstrating … There are several important areas where this study makes an original contribution to … The experimental work presented here provides one of the first investigations into how …

Describing the limitations of the current study

The thesis does not engage with … It is not the task of this paper to examine … This study is unable to encompass the entire … Establishing X is beyond the scope of this study. It is beyond the scope of this study to examine the … The analysis of X presented here is based solely on … A full discussion of X lies beyond the scope of this study. The reader should bear in mind that the study is based on … Another potential problem is that the scope of my thesis may be too broad. Due to practical constraints, this paper cannot provide a comprehensive review of…

Giving reasons for personal interest in the research*

I became interested in Xs after reading … My interest in this area developed while I was … I have worked closely with X for many years and … My personal experience of X has prompted this research. My main reason for choosing this topic is personal interest. It is my experience of working with X that has driven this research. This project was conceived during my time working for X. As a medical advisor, I witnessed …

* sometimes found in the humanities, and the applied human sciences

Outlining the structure of the paper or dissertation

The first section of this paper will examine… This paper begins by … It will then go on to … My thesis is composed of four themed chapters. The essay has been organised in the following way. The remaining part of the paper proceeds as follows: … The main issues addressed in this paper are: a), b) and c). This paper first gives a brief overview of the recent history of X. This paper has been divided into four parts. The first part deals with … The third chapter is concerned with the methodology used for this study. The overall structure of the study takes the form of six chapters, including … Chapter Four analyses the results of interviews and focus group discussions undertaken during … Chapter Two begins by laying out the theoretical dimensions of the research, and looks at how … The fourth section presents the findings of the research, focusing on the three key themes that …

Explaining key terms used in the current work

(also refer to  Defining terms )

Throughout this paper, the term ‘X’ will refer to … The term ‘X’ will be used in this thesis to refer to … Historically, the term ‘X’ has been used to describe … It is necessary here to clarify exactly what is meant by … The phrase ‘X’ will be used in this study to describe the … According to Smith (2002), X can be defined as follows: ‘ … ’ In this article, the abbreviation XYZ will be used to refer to … Throughout this dissertation, the term ‘X’ will be used to refer to … The term ‘X’ is a relatively new name for …, commonly referred to as … In this essay, the term ‘X’ will be used in its broadest sense to refer to all … In this dissertation, the terms ‘X’ and ‘Y’ are used interchangeably to mean … While a variety of definitions of the term X have been suggested, this paper will use the definition first suggested by Smith (1968) who saw it as …

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• English Grammar
• Sentence Starters

Sentence Starters - How to Use with Examples

Have you been finding it difficult to find good sentence starters? Do you think you have ideas but have some starting trouble? There is nothing to worry about if you do. All that you need to do is learn how to do it and apply them when penning down or voicing out your thoughts and ideas. This article will introduce you to what sentence starters are, how to use them effectively to form well-structured and coherent sentences in a paragraph along with examples for you to analyse and comprehend how it works.

Table of Contents

What is a sentence starter, where and how to use a sentence starter – points to remember, list of commonly used sentence starters, frequently asked questions on sentence starters.

Words and phrases that start off a sentence or introduce a thought can be referred to as sentence starters. Sentence starters make your writing more connected and meaningful. When you are writing about a topic, it is not necessary that you mention your ideas that support it; there definitely will be points that you think are mention-worthy but contradictory. We use sentence starters to make the transition and flow from one point to another smooth. This is not just the case with sentences; the same technique can also be used to connect paragraphs as well.

When you sit down to write a speech, an essay or a report on a particular topic, you normally start by jotting down the points from the top of your head. To add to what you know, you might also research a little. It is only then that you put everything together. When you do this, it is very important that you compare and contrast your thoughts as well as all the points that you have collected as part of your research and put them together in a way that all of it makes complete sense. This is where sentence starters play a role.

Sentence starters prepare your target audience for what’s coming next. It lets you bridge the gap between a thought, its justification, its contradiction, its examples, affirming evidence and so on. Now, knowing a number of sentence starters alone will not help. You have to learn how and where to use them in order to make your writing or speech meaningful.

To help you make proper and effective use of sentence starters, here is a list of the kind of situations where the usage of a sentence starter will definitely prove beneficial.

• The first instance would be when you are introducing a new thought or idea; for example, the very first sentence that is used to begin a paragraph, an essay, a report or a story.
• Be it fiction or nonfiction, whatever you are writing about has to have an interesting beginning. A catchy thought and the way you use your words creatively is what will hook your readers.
• When backing a thought with some data or when providing information that support/justify your finding, you will need a sentence starter to make a connection to whatever you have spoken about previously.
• When you have two contrasting ideas placed next to each other, you will have to use a sentence starter.
• A sentence starter can also help you emphasise on whichever idea you think is important.
• A sentence starter is further used to transition from one paragraph to another.
• Finally, to conclude a writeup, you can use a sentence starter so that your audience knows that it is the end of your piece.
• As long as the punctuation of a sentence with a sentence starter is concerned, the only thing you will have to keep in mind is that a comma is usually placed after the sentence starter in case the sentence starter is a preposition, an adverb or a phrase.

Examples of Sentence Starters

Going through some examples of sentence starters can give you a deeper understanding of what they are and where all you can use them, so go through the following section and make use of the examples provided in your writing as and when required.

Take a look at the following examples of sentence starters that can be used in the various situations mentioned.

What is a sentence starter?

Words and phrases that start off a sentence or introduce a thought can be referred to as sentence starters.

What are sentence starters used for?

Sentence starters make your writing more connected and meaningful. Sentence starters prepare your target audience for what’s coming next. It lets you bridge the gap between a thought, its justification, its contradiction, its examples, affirming evidence and so on.

Give some sentence starters for an essay.

Here are some examples of essay starters that you can use to begin your essay.

• The essay discusses
• In this essay
• This essay focuses on
• The essay will introduce you to

Give some examples of sentence starters to start a paragraph.

Given below are a few examples of sentence starters to start a paragraph.

• Studies show that
• In the era of
• There are more than
• The research emphasises
• With reference to

Give some examples of sentence starters to conclude your writing.

Here are a few examples of sentence starters to help you conclude your piece of writing.

• In conclusion
• To put it in a nutshell
• To summarise

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Personal Statement Sentence Starters: Expert Advice

Good personal statement openings are crucial when it comes to engaging admissions tutors.

But in the process of writing your personal statement, you might realise that you’re repeating the words you use in your opening sentences and paragraphs.

This lack of variety can lead to a sense of monotony in tone and content, alienating the reader.

But don’t worry!

There are several sentence starters you can use that won’t leave your personal statement sounding stilted or unnatural and that will help your personal statement stand out.

Here’s an expert guide to using effective sentence starters to improve your personal statement…  

Personal statement sentence starters fall into three specific categories. Introductions, comparisons and conclusions are effective ways to start paragraphs. Use connections, additions and relationships when developing content.  Starters relating to the presentation of ideas work well throughout.

From sixth-form personal statement sentence starters to postgraduate applications, you’ll discover specific examples of each of these personal statement sentence starter categories in the sections below…

Introduction, Comparison and Conclusion Starters

Having a practical understanding of personal statement sentence starters in this category is extremely valuable if you want to achieve greater variety and originality in your writing.

Introducing a new point or topic can become repetitive quickly; how many times have you written “I also” or “as a result”?

Avoiding these common phrases can add depth to your statement, but also encourage the reader to view you as an informed and versatile candidate.

As Mary Curnock Cook, a former UCAS Chief Executive states:

“The personal statement is supposed to be personal. Learning to write about yourself in a compelling way is a vital skill when applying for jobs; using hackneyed phrases is not the best way to stand out.” Mary Curnock Cook

Have you ever felt the need to write the kind of overused opening sentences that start with “At a young age..?”

If so, here are some introductory personal statement openings that will add to the compelling quality of your writing, without making it sound as though you’ve plucked words from a dictionary:

If you can make good use of comparative sentence starters , your writing will be increasingly concise, your points will be made with greater precision and you will be more likely to meet the word or character limit.

Here are some effective examples:

What follows are some excellent ways in which to start a concluding sentence or paragraph.

Remember that your aim is not to repeat previous content, but to use the opportunity to lead into the next paragraph or topic:

Connection, Addition and Relationship Starters

Once you’ve begun writing about a specific point or topic, you’ll find you need to connect one idea with another in order to make a concise or compelling point.

This connection can be challenging, as very quickly you might start to use a limited range of vocabulary such as “also” or “along with” or “as well as”.

These are the kinds of words that applicants use frequently, and they can indicate a lack of breadth, vocabulary or research in the mind of an admissions tutor.

Unoriginal vocabulary can also lead to your personal statement being rejected, or even to your entire application being refused, in the case of plagiarism.

According to Carly Minsky at timeshighereducation.com these are some of the most overused phrases featured in UCAS personal statements , so do make sure you don’t repeat them.

Below are some excellent suggestions for connecting or adding phrases, concepts or ideas in your personal statement:

It can be vitally important to effectively illustrate the relationship between an experience or piece of knowledge that you hold and the demands of the course or role that you are applying for.

The focus of the reader needs to be on the content itself , not the words you use to compare or contrast it, and these personal statement sentence starters will help you achieve this, every time:

Now you’re feeling more confident about your vocabulary, you should get to grips with the right structure to use for your personal statement.

My Personal Statement Template eBook gives you 10 original templates to follow when you’re writing a personal statement, meaning you’re guaranteed to find the right structure for your application.

It’s packed full of useful advice and shows you exactly what content to include. You’ll also discover how many words or characters to use for each paragraph for maximum effect!

Perfect for UCAS undergraduate applications, Oxbridge and Medicine , master’s degrees and employment , my eBook also includes exclusive guidance for writing a perfect statement of purpose .

Click on the image below to discover how my eBook can help you write the perfect personal statement…

Sentence Starters for Presenting New Ideas

An important aspect of your personal statement is the presentation of new ideas and concepts that illustrate your understanding of the course topic.

You should also show that you can synthesise aspects of your prior experience and knowledge.

This can be a complex process to write about, so having dynamic and effective vocabulary to work with can be extremely valuable.

The table below gives you a selection of examples of the kinds of sentence starters you could use to introduce a new concept in a personal statement opening sentence:

It’s worth noting that, generally speaking, new ideas and concepts should be contained within a specific paragraph. If you’re looking for advice on how to structure the paragraphs in your personal statement, check out my article here.

You may have noticed that I haven’t included a section in this post devoted to the kinds of sentence starters you shouldn’t use in your personal statement.

That’s because each personal statement is unique, and good sentence openers need to focus on different aspects of your experiences and ambitions. Try not to think about avoiding specific words or phrases and focus more on including content that best represents your ambitions!

If you really want some pointers on what not to include, Amy Davies has a great article on words you should never use in your personal statement over at whatuni.com . 

If you want to focus on writing an amazing opening paragraph, then check out my post that tells you exactly how great first paragraphs are created!

If you’re just starting out, then this is the post for you…

Good luck with your personal statement, and don’t forget to contact me if you’d like some 1-1 support.

You’ve got this! D

Research and content verified by Personal Statement Planet .

David Hallen

I've worked in the Further Education and University Admissions sector for nearly 20 years as a teacher, department head, Head of Sixth Form, UCAS Admissions Advisor, UK Centre Lead and freelance personal statement advisor, editor and writer. And now I'm here for you...

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How To Use Sentence Stems (Plus 60+ Examples for Every Subject)

Sentence stems help students …

Some students have no trouble expressing their thoughts, whether verbally or in writing. Others, though, need some help to get started. Sentence stems—sometimes called sentence starters, sentence frames, or thinking stems—help them do just that. Here’s how they work.

How To Use Sentence Stems

Provide all students with a list of sentence stems they can use during discussions or when they’re writing. For fluent writers or speakers, these stems may not be necessary, but they’re always helpful to have on hand. You can give kids a handout, or post an anchor chart for them to refer back to.

Be sure to model them for kids, showing how to fill in the blanks. Practice both out loud and in writing, providing your own example and then asking for their take. It’s OK if they simply fill in the blanks when they first start using these stems. But over time, students should use them more as a jumping-off point, to delve deeper into the topic.

Tip: Don’t require sentence stems if students don’t need them. Some kids will do just fine having a discussion on their own, or getting started on a writing assignment. But encourage others to use them as much as they need to. Eventually, these stems will become automatic, giving students tools to help them become better communicators.

Language Arts Sentence Stems

• The author used this technique because …
• The narrator is reliable/unreliable because …
• Characters in this story started out … but changed to …

• The theme of this story is … which is shown by …
• This story reminds me of …
• If could change the end of this story, I would …
• I liked/disliked this character because …
• This story made me feel … when …
• [Character] and [character] are alike/different because …
• My favorite part was …
• The author wants us to believe …

• Based on this text …
• The author proves their point by saying …
• I didn’t understand why …
• When I read … what I pictured in my head was …

Social Studies Sentence Stems

• These events are alike/different because …

• If this happened today …
• If I lived then, I would have …
• This happened because …
• The effects of this were …
• I agree/disagree with … because …

• I was surprised to learn …
• I don’t understand why …
• History repeated itself when …
• I feel inspired by …

 Science Sentence Stems

• The data shows …
• This experiment proved … because …
• I believe … will happen because …
• I expect to see …

• The cause of this is …
• The effect of this is …
• I was surprised when …
• We can find out by …
• We could change the outcome by …
• I discovered …
• The pattern I observed was …

• My results show …
• I predict … because …
• The experiment was a success/failure because …

Math Sentence Stems

• To solve this problem, I need to …
• The important information is …
• I can check my work by …
• Another way to solve this problem is …

• First I … Then I … Finally I …
• I found the answer by …
• This problem reminded me of …
• I can use this skill in real life when …
• I got the wrong answer because …
• This solution makes/doesn’t make sense because …

Discussion Sentence Stems

• When you said … I felt …
• I used to think … Now I think …
• I feel … when …

• We are alike/different because …
• I respect your opinion, but I disagree because …
• From my point of view …
• What I’m hearing you say is …

• If that happened to me, I would …
• What if we …
• I need some help with …

How do you use sentence stems? Come share your thoughts and ask for advice in the WeAreTeachers HELPLINE group on Facebook .

Plus, 40 must-have anchor charts for teaching writing of all kinds ., you might also like.

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How to Start a College Essay: 5 Effective Techniques

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Impressionable Openers

Descriptions and demonstrations, show vulnerability, be authentic, stay personal, fun & quirky, common mistakes to avoid in your college essay.

• Ways to Overcome Writer's Block

Frequently Asked Questions About Starting a College Essay

College essays are a huge part of your college career. If not huge, one of the biggest, and for someone who has been there and done that, I know the amount of pressure the beginning of a college essay, as well as the entire essay, can put on your shoulders.

Not only are you trying to juggle things like word count and grammar errors, but you're also trying to create the perfect college essay introduction that will attract admissions officers to your application or professors to your writing skills. And that, itself, can feel impossible, fill you with dread and self-doubt, but just breathe. I am here to help all present and future students know how to start a college essay.

Today is all about starting a college essay. I have come up with five easy and effective techniques that will help you create essays so good you're going to leave your readers wanting more , starting with your opening sentence! So, this is for all college students and college applicants. Stress no more! This guide was created to help you write a successful college essay. Let's get into it.

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The beginning of your essay should, first and foremost, always have a strong opening sentence . This sentence sets the tone for not only your readers but for the entire essay. Having a wobbly, almost interesting opener can steer an admissions officer and/or professor away, so you want it to be strong. And it doesn't have to be complicated! Less is more in this situation. Here are a couple of ways you can accomplish this.

• Look within and be relatable
• Use your real life for inspiration
• Think about ways to evoke emotion

Here are some examples of impressionable openers:

• Example 1: When I was 11 years old, my mother told me she had cancer over breakfast.
• Example 2: Maybe yellow isn't my favorite color.
• Example 3: I sat next to this girl in class who made me feel stupid.

DISCLAIMER : your opener should ALWAYS adhere to the essay prompts. These are just a few examples that can capture your reader's attention almost immediately.

In order to keep readers interested, visuals are key . Image-based descriptions will not only add value to your writing, it will give your readers front seats to your essay's journey. These descriptions let actions speak for themselves.

Here is an example of a description and demonstration in an essay:

• Example 1: "I was sitting on a bar stool when the word 'cancer' hit me like the smell of her coffee brewing on the stove. The Rice Krispies were popping in my cereal bowl, and MTV Jams was playing in the background, yet all I could hear was the sound of doom all around me. The lips of my mother were moving, but I was frozen, crumbling on this stool like my mother's health. She was sick, and I didn't know how sick or what that even meant, and that terrified me."

Why This Works:

Here you can clearly feel the writers emotional state: shocked, still, scared. Not only is this moment at breakfast traumatic, you feel frozen in time with the writer. Using descriptions like this will evoke so much emotion and leave your reader wanting more.

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Something one of my teachers told me in high school was any good essay will have personal elements in it, no matter the topic. That always stuck with me and became the way I approached my college essays. Showing vulnerability in your writing will always guarantee interest. It also evokes emotion.

You can show vulnerability by:

• Being honest
• Explaining what's going on inside underneath the exterior
• Describe what's going on around you at the moment
• Letting go of the fear of being seen
• Connecting with the topic
• Being transparent about mistakes/flaws

Examples of showing vulnerability:

• Example 1 : My mother telling me she had cancer over breakfast was not on my bingo card this year.
• Example 2 : I never thought losing someone I love would change me.
• Example 3: I had to lose everything in order to gain everything.

I know being vulnerable can be tough for some , but showing this side of you to college admissions officers and/or professors will not only make you stand out, but it can also help free you of things that might be weighing on your mind. Not to sound corny, but it can be therapeutic and make you a better writer . Just make sure you are staying on track with the essay prompt, and you're set!

Whether it's believed or not, an admissions officer wants to see pieces of you in your personal statement, so starting your essay by showing authenticity is a major major key. Along with being vulnerable, there are a few ways you can achieve this.

• Reflect : Take the time to reflect on your experiences, values, and beliefs that have shaped who you are today. Let your values, passions, and interests shine through in your writing.
• Mind Your Voice : Write in your own voice and avoid trying to sound like someone you're not. Authenticity comes from being genuine and true to yourself.
• Tell Your Story : Share personal anecdotes and insights that show your unique perspective.
• Be True to You : Focus on what matters to YOU (as long as you're on topic!). Write about what is meaningful and important to you rather than what you think admissions officers want to hear.

Above all, be open . Showing introspection and self-awareness in your essay will show any admissions committee who you are beneath the surface, as well as your personal growth.

You can also begin your essay being as random and silly as you'd like . It goes hand-in-hand with other important factors like vulnerability and authenticity. But don't get too crazy . Beginning your essay with something strange will definitely draw readers in. Let me show you what I mean.

• Example 1 : I start my mornings off in silence and solitude to keep people away from me.
• Example 2 : Sometimes, I like to circle big words in complex articles to learn new words. Yeah, but to also keep one in my back pocket for later use.
• Example 3 : Being the youngest child means getting away with everything you want, and that's exactly how I like it.

Do you see how each sentence draws you in? Not only are they light-hearted, but they also make you want to know why you want to keep people away in the morning and what kind of weapon you're forming against others with new words. And every youngest sibling will attest to feeling that exact same way. All of these examples are sure to make your essay fun, show who you are, and leave readers wanting more.

Years of writing college essays have taken me through every high and low of the process possible. And when they're good, they're great! But for some reason, my mistakes stick out more than anything. So, I've compiled a list of common mistakes to avoid when writing your college essay .

• Avoid Being Cliche - While you want to be captivating, you want to avoid overly used syntax and phrases that could potentially lose your reader's curiosity. For example, "in today's day and age," "follow my heart," "don't judge a book by its cover," etc. are all cliches that can be avoided by thinking outside of the box.
• Using Vocabulary to be Impressive - I know you want to impress the admissions committees, but it's important to stick to what you know and not what you can allude to. That is, use verbiage that resonates with your personality. Using extravagant words can work against you, and they can also sound forced. College admissions officers want to see the real you, so show it to them.
• Steer Clear of Controversy - Though it's not said enough, your college essay should tell your personal story and not touch on things that can stir the pot. For instance, talking about politics and religious beliefs may not be the route you want to take UNLESS it's called for in the college essay topic. And if so, stay on track with the essay prompts.
• Procrastinating : Waiting until the last minute to start writing your essay will bite you in the butt. You will feel rushed and end up writing a poorly crafted piece. Give yourself enough time to complete an essay draft, edit the draft, and repeat this two-step cycle until your essay is complete.
• Lack of originality : This goes hand-in-hand with avoiding cliches. Your college essay should exude a lot of your personality, so show admissions officers and teachers who you are! Include your cultural background, test scores that you're proud of, any future aspirations, etc. This all depends on the essay prompts, of course, but in my experience, every essay topic has room to show who you are.
• Ignoring the prompt : This is a major key. STAY ON TRACK. Make sure to carefully read and understand the essay prompt, and write your essay accordingly. The last thing you want to do is write a college essay that has nothing to do with the prompt. Reading is essential here.
• Lack of focus : If you want to know how to start a college essay, that means knowing how to stay focused. Find a quiet space, turn off electronics, hide your phone, and really nestle into how you want to capture your reader's attention. This will help you use your five senses clearly, keep your writing strong and not write an overly wordy essay. Focus is the tool here.
• Poor organization : Make sure your essay has a strong structure with clear transitions between paragraphs. An outline will work best to accomplish this. If you go into starting your college essay without a plan, be prepared to hit all roadblocks.
• Neglecting to Revise and Edit : Like procrastinating, don't fail to revise and edit your work. Always, always, always proofread your essay for grammar, spelling, and punctuation errors , as well as clarity and coherence.
• Not Seeking Feedback : Listen, I know that completing an essay is an accomplishment in itself, and you immediately want to submit it, but it's so beneficial to have others read your essay for feedback. You can only spot so many holes in your work when your eyes are constantly reviewing it, so a second, third, or even fourth set of eyes can help point out areas for improvement.

Above all, trust the writing process. Though I do want you to be aware of your jargon, don't get too wrapped up in thinking you're making a mistake. That's what editing is for! Once you complete your college essay, you should always revise and edit accordingly . What you thought sounded good might make you edit it to sound great. Just keep in mind that many colleges are looking for honesty and authenticity vs how well you can sound on paper . So, if you're aware of these factors, you'll be good to go.

Ways to Overcome Writer's Block

Take it from someone who has suffered from chronic writer's block, it's a pain to get through . Imagine being on a writing streak so good that when you stop, the entire essay writing process stops as a whole. It's definitely a challenge, but after 10 years of writing essays and really honing my craft, I learned a few things that have helped me get through even the thickest of writer's blocks, and I want to share them with you. Check them out:

• Take a break : This works every single time. Take a short break and step away from your computer to clear your mind and come back with a fresh perspective. For me, 15 minutes is all I ever need. If you need more time, that's okay. Just try not to make your break a rest.
• Freewriting : Sometimes, I'd start writing without worrying about my structure or grammar to get the ideas flowing, and surprisingly enough, I found my essay taking a pleasant turn.
• Change your environment : Move around. Don't underestimate the effects of a different location or workspace to stimulate creativity. Try coffee shops, bookstores, a park, or a new room in your house. New environment, new energy.
• Set small goals : This one is actually the most important. Some people get overwhelmed with the word "essay" for things like lack of proper writing skills, pressure to write a great essay, etc. But if you try breaking down your writing task into smaller, manageable chunks to make it less overwhelming, it can help. For example, set a goal of three paragraphs one day, take a day to edit those paragraphs, two more the next day, and so forth. Find a formula that works for you.
• Brainstorming : Write down all your ideas--everything. No matter how small you think the idea is, write it down. Even if these ideas seem unrelated, they will help you generate new thoughts and connections.
• Read or listen to music : It took me a while to realize this helps, but engaging in other forms of art can inspire new ideas and break through mental blocks. And new creativity can lead you to impress admissions officers.
• Talk it out : As a writer, it's hard to let people in on the creative process, but discussing my ideas with a friend, family member, or colleague helped me gain new perspectives and insights.
• Relax and Meditate : Hear me out: it works! Practice deep breathing and/or meditation to reduce stress and anxiety that may be contributing to writer's block.

I won't sugarcoat it: the college application process can be intimidating , but it doesn't have to throw you off your game. When it comes to college essays, I see them as opportunities to be fun and expressive. Trust me when I say if you have fun with it, you'll attract the reader's attention , paint vivid details, and write an essay that will leave the admissions officer wanting you at their school. So, take it one step at a time and watch your personal statement come to life.

How can I make my college essay stand out to admissions officers?

Simply put, be yourself. As long as you stay on track with the essay's topic, showing pieces of yourself will allow admissions officers to know more about who you are. Essays are meant to show readers who you are, how you feel, and what you think naturally, not robotically, so be authentic in your writing, and you'll be sure to stand out amongst the rest.

What are some common mistakes to avoid when writing a college essay?

Some common mistakes to avoid in your essay are using cliches and boring wording. You also want to avoid procrastinating, wasting time, not focusing, not editing, etc. When writing your essay, you want to make sure you give your writing the time and attention it deserves, so make sure you're aware of what is pulling you away from your writing. This will help you stay focused. If you have any other doubts, refer to the section about mistakes in this article and let it guide you to success.

How important is the college essay in the admissions process?

Your college essay is key in the admissions process . It's an admissions committee's first impression of you as a writer and potential student, so it should be taken very seriously. Trying to cut corners or rush through the writing process will be obvious, and it will stand out more than things like test scores, academic achievements, extracurricular activities, and any other positive influence you've had in your life. So, don't take the easy way out and really work on your essay.

Feeling confident in your college essay skills and want to explore some other essay content? Explore our blog on the comma splice to enhance your technical writing skills!

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🚀 New update V2 (15 December, 2023) Advanced sentence checking and superior detection for your best writing yet!✨

Sentence Starters for Descriptive Writing

Writing is not just a work of putting down a few words on the paper and making sentences. You have to engage your reader. Once they are engaged they become curious about what you are going to write next. In this curiosity, they are going to end the whole piece of paper that you have written without shifting their attention.

This is what we call true writing where you get a chance to talk to your readers.

In today’s world, this is something that is very important, especially if you are a web content creator. Your every sentence needs to be engaging. Otherwise, there are a number of different things that can grab the reader’s attention.

This is the reason why your sentences need to be started with different and unique words. Well, don’t worry, I am not saying you create and invent new words. But, using some transition words can add a lot of worth to your work.

Here are 5 different purposes for which you can use a different starter.

Sentence Starters Examples:

#1 introducing an idea.

When introducing or opening an idea you can use these transition words. They make the reader realize that you are going to add something important after this.

• To start with,
• Adding here
• Here we will discuss,

#2  To Compare Things

Use these transition words when comparing two different things. They will help you in linking the next thing to the first and tells the reader that you are trying to tell them is how both of these ideas are different from each other.

• In contrast
• In comparison

#3 To Add Emphasis

If you are trying to add emphasis on an idea then start a sentence with these words.

#4 To Show Consequences

There are many ways how you can show the consequence of the previous idea. Here are a few words that can help you with that.

• As a result
• Accordingly

#5 When Concluding

Summing up your whole idea is a very important part of writing. It needs to be as interesting as your whole article was.

• To summarize

Why Sentence Starters are Important?

1. credibility of your work.

The choice of words you make shows how much you are master in your work. Writing just a few simple sentences with a subject and verb doesn’t make you a good writer. You have to convey your work in a way that the reader cannot predict what you are going to say at the end until he reaches the bottom of the page.

For, this you need to have eight starters as well.

2. Makes The Reader Curios

If you want your reader to stick to your work then you have to make them curious. After reading every sentence he needs to engage with you. The choices of words you make are going to decide whether he continues on reading or not.

3. Helps You In Linking Ideas Together

Good sentences can’t even link the ideas. You have to find the right words to do that job. The words that you start your sentence with should be linking it to the previous sentence. That is the job of starters.

4. Makes Your Article Interesting

Of course, if your work is interesting then it will be read and chose to be read. Otherwise, who wants to just read a piece of paper with raw information. You need to add creativity to your work. Well, you must be thinking of how to make an essay interesting. You can if you are using the right words to start and conclude your article.

How To Choose The Right Starter

The simple science behind choosing the right word to start your sentence is that you have to link your sentence to the previous one. Now, once you understand that it becomes a lot easier.

Read the sentence and check whether the new one that you are starting is concluding it, comparing it, emphasizing on it, or what. After this, you have to decide which word you chose to start. There are completely different sets of words that can be used in every different situation.

Besides this, the other thing or the golden rule for this is that you have to start your every sentence with a different transition word. Using the same words again and again in a paragraph can make your writing dull and boring. It will resorb all the interest that you have tried to create.

These are the two important that can completely change the whole dimension of your writing. It helps you in linking ideas together and creates something that we call a piece done by a skilled person.

The last tip that you can follow is that whenever you are using a transition word, add a comma after it. It won’t add much but can make the article more readable.

Compare both of these paragraphs.

Video games and other devices have spoiled our generations. Parents are worried about their children. They don’t want their children to become robots. We need to do something as soon as possible.

Now read this one,

“Generally speaking, video games and other devices have spoiled our generation. No doubt, parents are worried about their children. Obviously, they don’t want their children to become robots. That is why we need to do something as soon as possible.

These are some of the basic rules and things that can make your writing like never before. Adding transition words and linking ideas together will take the readability of your article to a whole new level. Instead of using just a few simple sentences. Try to link them. These were some of the best starters to start with.

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Sentence Starters To Broaden Your Vocabulary in Analysing Argument

June 8, 2022

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Writing an Analysing Argument (or Language Analysis) essay can be difficult, and sometimes selecting language that won’t sound repetitive is the tricky part. If you’re looking for ways to overcome that hurdle and make your writing sound more formal, then this is the blog for you. 

In these tables are simple sentence starters you can use to formalise and clarify your ideas in a non-repetitive way. This blog takes into account the most important elements of a Language Analysis, such as analysing visuals and connecting a technique back to the author’s intention (that is, what they want the audience to think/feel/do). 

Within these tables, I’ve included a sentence example for each phrase. The examples are in response to a fictional article by Samantha Pearson, What’s wrong with using online lingo in everyday life?. The article is about Gen Z's use of online lingo and argues that the concern surrounding its potential implications is unfounded. If you’d like to see the entire original article and an A+ essay written in response (along with a number of other sample articles and high-scoring essays), you’ll find all of this and more in How To Write A Killer Language Analysis .

If you’d like to see a detailed guide on Language Analysis, including what you're expected to cover, how to prepare for your SAC and Exam and more, check out our Ultimate Guide to VCE Language Analysis .

Get our FREE VCE English Text Response mini-guide

Now quite sure how to nail your text response essays? Then download our free mini-guide, where we break down the art of writing the perfect text-response essay into three comprehensive steps. Click below to get your own copy today!

Access a FREE sample of our How To Write A Killer Language Analysis study guide

• Learn LSG's unique SIMPLICITY and SPECIFICITY strategy which has helped hundreds of students achieve A+
• Includes annotated sample A+ essays (including responses to past VCAA exams)
• Learn how to analyse single articles and visuals , and comparative analysis (analysing 2 or 3 articles/visuals together)
• Different types of essay structures broken down so you understand what to do and what not to do with confidence

Last updated 20/10/19

Planning is an essential part of any successful text response essay. It helps you ensure that you’re answering the prompt, utilising enough quotes and writing the most unique and perceptive analysis possible! The hard part of this is that you only have about FIVE MINUTES to plan each essay in the Year 12 English exam… (more info on the best way to tackle that challenge in this video !)

So, I developed the FIVE TYPES of essay prompts to help students streamline their planning process and maximise every minute of their SACs and exams.

By identifying the type of prompt you’re being challenged with immediately, a number of parameters or guidelines are already set in place. For a specific type of prompt, you have specific criteria to meet – for example, in a metalanguage-based prompt , you immediately know that any evidence you brainstorm in your planning stage should be based around the literary techniques used in your given text.

If you’d like the full picture on our best FREE advice on Text Response, check out our Ultimate Guide to VCE Text Response here .

1. Theme-Based Prompt

‘Ambition in the play Macbeth leads to success.’ Discuss. ( Macbeth )

When you’re presented with a theme-based prompt, you can automatically shift your brainstorming and planning towards the themes mentioned in the prompt along with any others that you can link to the core theme in some way.

In regard to this Macbeth prompt, for example, you could explore the different ways the theme of ambition is presented in the text. Additionally, the themes of guilt and power are intimately related to ambition in the text, so you can use those other ideas to aid your brainstorming and get you a step ahead of the rest of the state come exam day.

2. Character-Based Prompt

‘Frankenstein’s hubris is what punishes him.’ Discuss. ( Frankenstein )

These prompts are pretty easy to spot – if you see a character’s name in the prompt, there you have it; you have a character-based prompt on your hands.

Once you know this, you can assume that each example you brainstorm has to be relevant to the specific character named in the prompt in some way. Also, you can explore how the actions of characters don’t occur in isolation – they’re almost always interrelated. Remember, however, that the actions of characters are always connected to the themes and ideas the author is trying to convey.

This type of prompt also grants you some freedoms that other types don’t give. For example, unlike a Theme-based prompt, a character-based prompt means that it’s perfectly fine to write about characters in the topic sentences of your body paragraphs.

3. How-Based Prompt

‘How does Grenville showcase Rooke’s inner conflict in The Lieutenant ?’ ( The Lieutenant )

Unlike other prompts, the ‘How’ positions you to focus more on the author’s writing intentions. This can be achieved by discussing metalanguage – language that describes language (read my blog post about it here ). These prompts tell you immediately that you need to be thinking about the literary techniques explored in the text and explain how they affect the narrative.

Rather than using specific techniques to frame your specific arguments, it’s best to use them as evidence to support arguments that attack the main themes/ideas mentioned in the prompt.

4. Metalanguage or Film-Technique-Based Prompt

‘Hitchcock’s use of film techniques offers an unnerving viewing experience’. Discuss. ( Rear Window )

This type of prompt is very similar to How-based prompts, specifically in the fact that the discussion of literary techniques is essential.

For this type of prompt specifically, however, the actual techniques used can form more of a basis for your arguments, unlike in How-based prompts .

5. Quote-Based Prompt

“Out, damned spot!” How does Shakespeare explore the burden of a guilty conscience in Macbeth ? ( Macbeth )

Countless students ask me every year, “What do I do when there’s a quote in the prompt?!” My reply to these questions is actually fairly straightforward!

There are two main things that you should do when presented with this type of prompt. Firstly, contextualise the quote in your essay and try to use it in your analysis in some way. Secondly, interpret the themes and issues addressed in the quote and implement these into your discussion. The best place to do both of these is in a body paragraph – it weaves in seamlessly and allows for a good amount of analysis, among other reasons!

When faced with unknown prompts in a SAC or your exam, it's reassuring to have a formulaic breakdown of the prompt so that your brain immediately starts categorising the prompt - which of the 5 types of prompts does this one in front of me fall into? To learn more about brainstorming, planning, essay structures for Text Response, read our Ultimate Guide to VCE Text Response .

For an overview of the EAL study design plus tips and tricks for language analysis, time management and more, check out The Ultimate Guide to EAL .

EAL Language Analysis Introductions

Both EAL and mainstream English students will need to complete a Language Analysis task as part of the VCAA Exam. The introduction of Language Analysis essays for VCE English is somewhat rigid as there are multiple components that must be included, for instance: issue, form, contention, name, publishing date, tone, etc. However, many of the ‘must have’ components of mainstream English essays are not required for EAL students or the EAL end-of-year examination. Check with your school/teacher to find out their opinion and criteria on this matter though, as they mark your internal assessments/Language Analysis SAC!

The 2019 VCE English as an Additional Language Examination Report states: 

‘Introductions should be limited to showing an awareness of the audience, the context and the overall contention of the piece.’

With this guideline in mind, the advice I am sharing in this blog post is based on the understanding and assumption that EAL Language Analysis introductions DO NOT need background information such as where the article is published, when is it published, style, etc. But again, make sure you check with your school/teacher to find out exactly what criteria YOU need to meet for your assessments/SACs that are marked internally. 

Using Templates in Your EAL Language Analysis Introductions

Since EAL is more flexible than mainstream English, and requires fewer elements, you can adopt a template for introductions that you are comfortable using to save time during the assessments. 

For example, these sentence templates below are really versatile and can be easily adapted and/or combined to suit your essay: 

• In response to the divisive issue of…(AUTHOR 1) implicitly/explicitly/inadvertently contends that…
• (AUTHOR 1) takes on a...tone to grab the attention of...(SPECIFIC AUDIENCE)
• Similarly/contrastingly,...,(AUTHOR 2) implicitly/explicitly/inadvertently contends that...in a...tone.

Using the templates above, here are some examples of what the final product for your introduction may look like. I have bolded the ‘template’ parts so that you can see exactly how the templates have been used, but remember these are just templates, so you can adjust the wording slightly to suit your needs:

And if you want to learn more about tones, head to 195 Language Analysis Tones .

Example 1 (Using Templates 1 & 3)

(1) In response to the divisive issue of building an Apple global flagship store at Federation Square, the COMAAFS implicitly contends in an accusatory and defiant tone that the flagship store should not be built to replace one of Melbourne’s most popular landmarks. (3) Contrastingly , the web post written by the Victorian Government explicitly rejects the accusation from COMAAFS and advocates for the immense benefits that Victorians will receive from the Flagship store in an explanatory and reassuring tone .

Example 2 (Using Templates 1 & 3)

(1) In response to the divisive issue of homeless people camping in the city of Melbourne, Christopher Bantick contends in an accusatory and heated tone that the ‘move-on’ law must be introduced in order to remove the homeless in Melbourne. (3) Contrastingly , Dr. Meg Mundell insists that making it illegal to sleep on the street will only exacerbate the problem in a demanding tone .  

Example 3 (Using Templates 1 & 3)

(1) In response to the recent furore of the increasing use of cars, Tina Fanning contends in an alarming and mobilising tone that cars are no longer a viable mode of transport in the foreseeable future. (3) Similarly, Lucy Manne predicts the catastrophic consequence of excessive car use on Australian society in a composed and authoritative tone .

If you want to take your introduction to the next level, see The Importance of the Introduction for tips!

Comparison of Arguments & Contentions in EAL Language Analysis

Unlike mainstream English, comparison of arguments/contention between the two writers is not essential for EAL, but it will probably earn you bonus brownie points if you do have time to add it in your essay :) For further explanation on comparative analysis, you can refer to this step-by-step guide: Exploring an A+ Language Analysis Essay Comparing Two Articles . Although the guide is aimed at mainstream English students, you can still apply some of the tips and strategies as an EAL student. It will really help to take your Language Analysis to the next level!

For many VCE Students, Language Analysis is most commonly their ‘weakest’ section out of all three parts of VCE English. Throughout my years of tutoring, when I’ve asked these students  why  they struggle, they usually blame the difficulty in grasping the  most  important component of Language Analysis:

Understanding  how   the author  intends  to persuade their readers.  

You’ll see that I have italicised the words, ‘how’ and ‘intends’ in the above statement to highlight where your focus needs to be. If you’re currently trying to get your head around Language Analysis, or if you don’t understand where you’re going wrong, don’t worry. We’re going to look at the incorrect assumptions students make about Language Analysis, how to avoid it and also what you  should  do instead! So first, let’s have a look at a couple of common student errors. Students (including yourself perhaps) may believe that:

1. Language Analysis is about  finding  language techniques that persuade readers.

Stop right there! This certainly isn’t a treasure hunt ( but that would be pretty awesome right? ). If an essay was just about identifying language techniques, everyone would get an A+ ( we wish! ). Once you’ve had some practice under your belt, you’ll notice that anyone can find rhetorical questions, inclusive language and statistics, so there is a lot more to it than simply pointing out language techniques. Also, steer clear from throwing in all the possible language techniques you’ve found in an article too, because it’s not a competition about who can find the most techniques and even if you did, it doesn’t guarantee you an amazing score on your essay.

2. Language analysis is about  if  authors successfully persuade their readers.

Sorry to tell you, but this definitely isn’t it either. Our job as the student isn’t to figure out whether or not the author successfully persuades their reader. You can’t really speak for all the people reading an article if they do or do not agree with the author’s contention. Just like if you see an advertisement on television for MacDonalds, you can’t tell if the next person who watches the ad will be persuaded to go out and buy a Big Mac meal. That’s why at the end of the day, it’s not up to you to figure out the extent to which the author persuades their readers. So in that case, what should you be doing instead?

The ultimate goal is to demonstrate your understanding of how the author attempts to persuade the reader to agree with his or her contention.

Let’s break up the essential parts of analysing language so we can pinpoint exactly the part that is most problematic and also how we can finally get a strong grasp of how to be successful in this area:

The  TEE  rule

—Technique  – what  persuasive technique  is used?

—Example  – which  text  that shows it?

—Effect  – what is the  intended impact  on readers’ attitudes?

1. Technique 

There are so many persuasive techniques around, once you’ve got your hands on a bunch of language technique lists then you’re pretty much set in this area. Be wary however, as I have mentioned in the past (and above)  how simply ‘labelling’ language techniques is not enough for you to do well in language analysis.

This is quite frankly, the easiest part of Language Analysis! All you need to do is quote your evidence! Straightforward? If quoting is not your forte, you can check out:  how to embed quotes in your essay like a boss

3.  Effect 

Ok, this is the core of most students’ issues. We already know that the author is trying to persuade readers but here, we’re going to look how their choice of words or phrases creates a certain  effect  on readers so that they will be encouraged to agree with the author. When thinking about the effect, the best way is to put yourself in the reader’s shoes – you are after all, a reader! So in order to understand the effect think about the following three points:

• What readers may feel – emotions
• What readers may think – thoughts
• And what readers may want – wishes

Example 1: “You are my smartest friend, I’m really stuck on this question and I need help!”

—Think about it realistically. If someone said this to you, how would you feel? There must’ve been a time where you were complimented (whether it be about your clothes, how you did something well, or how friendly you are with others), and you used this experience to your advantage. Each time you analyse a language technique, contemplate on what emotions, thoughts or wishes emerge as a result. When someone gives you a compliment, you probably feel flattered, or maybe even proud. And this is exactly what you need to include in your analysis! You should garner these everyday experiences as a trigger to help you understand how readers may respond to a certain technique. So if we broke it down via the TEE formula:

T echnique: Compliment

—E xample: “You are my smartest friend, I’m really stuck on this question and I need help!”

— E ffect: You feel feel proud and as a result want to assist your friend.

And let’s put it all together coherently and concisely:

Analysis: The compliment, “You are my smartest friend, I’m really stuck on this question and I need help!” encourages the listener to feel a sense of pride and this in turn, may encourage them to assist their friend.

Example 2: “The pet puppy was stuck inside a car on a 32 degree summer day, with no windows left open, and no room for fresh air.”

Again, think about the three points – how do you feel? What do you think of this scenario? What do you want as a result? You probably feel sorry for the puppy and want to save it from this situation.

—T echnique: Appeal to sympathy

—E xample: “The pet puppy was stuck inside a car on a 32 degree summer day, with no windows left open, and no room for fresh air.”

— E ffect: You may feel that it is unfair for the puppy to be in such a horrendous and potentially life-threatening situation.

Analysis: Through the appeal to sympathy, “the pet puppy was stuck inside a car on a 32 degree summer day, with no windows left open, and no room for fresh air”, readers may believe that it is unfair for the puppy to be subjected to such a horrendous and potentially life-threatening situation and thus, may be persuaded to take action to prevent further harm to pets.

Ultimately, focus on the potential effect language can have on the reader and as a result, how this may encourage the reader to agree with the author. If you do that, then you’re definitely on the right track. If this study guide has helped you gain further insight into Language Analysis, then you may be interested in my upcoming workshop where I spend a few hours offering advanced advice on Language Analysis! No matter what scores you have been attaining in Language Analysis, whether high or low, my workshop is loaded with tips which will undoubtedly help you achieve the best you possibly can. You are welcome to register here:  VCE English Intensive Spring Break Workshop . Join the Facebook event  here  today to keep updated on all the latest information in the lead up to the workshop and invite your friends!

English is tough. Whether it be memorising quotes or writing under timed conditions, everybody has something that they need to work on — some missing link that may make the difference between grades.

The fun yet exasperating part of English is that there’s always some way to improve. Even the best of the best can struggle with differentiating themselves from the pack, irrespective of how many quotes they know or how well they understand the subject matter. Often, students can feel shackled by the formulaic “topic sentence plus explanation plus evidence plus analysis plus concluding statement”, leaving great ideas in the mud as they scramble to fit their essay into restrictive boxes.

Sometimes, the conventional structure of an English essay can weigh a student down, which is why bending those rules is a skill that, eventually, can prove the key to truly going above and beyond .

Walk before you run

Before you move past your structure, though, you’ve got to know it.

Every essay paragraph needs to hit on a few key points: a main argument, evidence, and analysis of that evidence relating back to the prompt. For example…

In Station Eleven, forgetting is more important than remembering. Do you agree?

Planning is crucial irrespective of your writing style. The texts you study are meant to be thought-provoking, so thought needs to go into what you’re going to say even before you start saying it. My more flexible, relaxed essays always resulted in plans that looked identical to more conventional responses, as seen below.

• Forgetting is important as a coping mechanism to the post-modern world -> older people who “lost more” e.g. Jeevan, Dieter, Clark’s demands to “[not] think about it”
• Nevertheless, remembering is important in forging paths to the future -> the Travelling Symphony
• When they are both embraced, both forgetting and remembering can create the new and honour the old -> the Museum of Civilisation and the electric town

Once you have this understanding of structure, you can begin to move past it.

What exactly does an essay “beyond structure” mean? The way English is currently taught results in a lot of essays more or less looking the same, with a topic sentence dutifully followed by explanation of that point, and evidence not being introduced until about halfway through the paragraph.

Essays beyond structure don’t ignore those points, but rather, they shuffle them around a little. Evidence can be introduced right after the topic sentence, for example.

The shock of the Georgia Flu is catastrophic, entirely subverting the technological interconnectedness of the 21st century… The “divide between a before and an after” that the Georgia Flu marks is so devastating and uncompromising that it is little wonder, then, that forgetting should become such a crucial tool for reconciling oneself with the radical new world order.

Growing out of "crutch" phrases

In structured essays, transitions between points are obvious. When we want to introduce a quote, we say something like “In Mandel’s Station Eleven… ”, and when we want to analyse that quote we say “Here, the author…”.

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with using phrases like these! They can be very helpful in showing your assessor where you are addressing the task and the text. But addressing “crutch” phrases in your writing, which are often overused and underdeveloped, is a fairly straightforward way of forcing yourself to write differently.

Some “crutches” that I always used include:

• This exemplifies… – introduction to analysis
• Indeed… – transition to another point
• Ultimately/In conclusion… – concluding

It is important not to mistake signposting for these crutch phrases, such as “Furthermore” or “Conversely”. Signposting helps assessors determine when you are building on or deviating from previous points, which is highly useful when they’ve read a hundred essays on the same prompt as yours. Crutch phrases, on the other hand, make you feel better about your essay, when in actuality they contribute very little and could be rewritten to be something of greater value.

The following statement follows the typical English pattern of evidence to analysis.

In Emily St John Mandel’s Station Eleven, Dieter “longs for the sound of an electric guitar”. This exemplifies the wider loss of technology, and even identity, suffered by humanity after the Georgia Flu, and indeed is further highlighted by the “incomplete list” of Chapter 6.

There’s nothing wrong with the analysis above, and it makes a good point about the text. But removing “This exemplifies” forces a writer to try something daring and new…

Dieter, an otherwise well-adjusted member of the Travelling Symphony, “longs for the sound of an electric guitar” – his desire echoes Chapter 6’s list, and the omnipresent lack of electricity to a species once defined by it.

Shorter quotes are your friend

A great way to keep up the momentum of such an essay is to let points bleed into each other. There is no rule in English that says the first two sentences of your paragraph can’t include evidence, nor any regulations stipulating that the end of a paragraph has to be a rewritten version of the topic sentence.

Evidence, I have found, is the best way to bridge gaps between discrete points of structure. Not only does using evidence show understanding of the text, but it doesn’t have to be an entire sentence all on its own. Sometimes, two or three words are enough to marry two points – and, at the end of the day, shorter quotes are easier to memorise!

Mandel’s narrator mourns fundamental modern aspects of survival, such as “pharmaceuticals” and “fire departments… police”, in the same space that she pays homage to “concert stages” and “social media”. The resulting impression is not one of traditional cutthroat dystopia… Rather, Mandel’s quiet remembrance of the … modern innovations of technology that brought the 21st century together … highlights the emotional consequences of such ease of communication being lost.

Reading is fundamental

If you’re feeling a little overwhelmed about moving beyond structure, don’t worry – there’s something quick and easy that you can do right now to help push your writing, and it doesn’t even involve any writing of your own.

If you get the opportunity to, I would encourage you to read other people’s essays. Obviously, higher-grade essays are always valuable, but they can also be intimidating, even demoralising. I’ve found that reading essays at my grade level, or even lower, have been fantastic for learning new phrases and picking up different bits of evidence.

The best thing about English, in my opinion, is the same thing that brings it the most criticism – that there is no right answer. It can never hurt your understanding of a text (or your potential grade) if your discussion is informed about more perspectives.

Practice makes... progress!

At the end of the day, any and all good English essays have their roots in the fundamentals. Even as you play around with structure and move past formula, it is always crucial to remember the basics, and to return to them if you feel like you’re getting lost.

Always remember to link back to the prompt! It’s something so basic and obvious that students of all grades overlook. The prompt is the backbone of your essay – make sure that you keep it centre stage.

Get feedback as often as you can, whether it be from teachers, tutors or other students that you trust. English is a game of constant tweaking and refinement, and the more feedback you get the better your essays will be for it.

Finally, practice. Writing, like any skill, can only be honed and improved if one puts effort into honing and improving it. Writing beyond structure often comes as a massive learning curve, and it is diligence and a willingness to learn – not natural talent – that will allow you to become better and better at it.

To conclude

English is tough, and because almost everybody does it, it can be hard to stand out from the masses. Being different takes courage, and in VCE it certainly takes a lot of work, but I have found that writing beyond structure has the potential to elevate not only your understanding of a text or your performance in SACs and the exam, but your enjoyment of writing for English as a whole.

This blog was updated on 28/10/2021.

Essay Topic Breakdown

Sample essay topics.

• Useful Resources

Themes (Similarities and Differences)

[Video Transcription]

We’ll be applying the CONVERGENT and DIVERGENT strategy from LSG’s How To Write A Killer Comparative and at how ideas are developed in similar or different thematic directions in these texts. CONVERGENT ideas lead to similar conclusions and messages, while DIVERGENT ideas take us to different conclusions. If you’d like to learn more about this strategy which can help you build more insightful discussions of the text by finding unique points of comparison, then I’d recommend you check out the LSG’s How To Write A Killer Comparative study guide. In the meantime, let’s start with some CONVERGENT ideas. 

Power, Race and Oppression

In both texts, we see racial systems that take power away from Bla(c)k people. In the play, settler-colonialism is a big one. It’s depicted as a home invasion, a ship taking up a whole harbour, and as a process of devaluing land and ignoring its custodians. This trickles into contemporary institutions (widely understood patterns, rules or structures within society) which perpetuate these dynamics of race and power, such as the police and the media. Oppression is similarly maintained in  The Longest Memory , where physical violence, and even just the threat of possible physical violence, is used to enslave African Americans. Plus, all of this racial violence was justified by the socio-economic interests of enslavers . Both texts see Bla(c)k people disempowered by a range of white institutions. 

Check out our comparative scene analysis where we explore this theme in more depth.

Family and Community

On the other hand, family and the wider community are depicted as a galvanising or healing force in both texts. In  The 7 Stages of Grieving , we see how death can bring together entire communities to commiserate, dance and mourn collectively, drawing on one another’s strength. Depictions of families in projections of photographs also outline how joy and solidarity can be drawn from community. In the novel, family ties are also important. Whitechapel and Cook build a committed relationship to one another; she even says, “he proves he loves me every day.” At the same time, Cook also provides her unconditional love and support to Chapel, whose education and eventual relationship with Lydia are facilitated by her.

Memory and Grief

Both texts show how memory and grief are significant burdens for Bla(c)k people and operate at multiple dimensions. The play is sort of built around the five stages of grief but demonstrates how First Nations grief isn’t neat or linear. It can go from highly expressive to numb in moments. It also has roots in Australia’s genocidal history such that the death of any First Nations person—but especially elders—is felt widely. In  The Longest Memory , there’s a physical dimension to Whitechapel’s grief. He earns the name “Sour-face” because of the worry lines that developed after Chapel’s death. He feels extremely guilty and only after Chapel dies does he realise why Chapel disagreed with him so stubbornly in life. He actually learned the tough lesson that he’d been hoping to teach Chapel.

What about divergent ideas? Let’s break down two now.

Struggle and resistance.

Both texts offer ideas about what the fight against racism might look like, but at times these ideas are more different than similar. In  The 7 Stages of Grieving , the main struggle is to be heard and understood . In the play and in real life even, we can see how the media is stacked against First Nations peoples, so their fight is about cutting through the bias and making sure they are fairly represented. In  The Longest Memory , the fight against slavery is portrayed quite differently. In a scenario where physical violence was used the way it was in order to oppress, self-emancipation was seen by many as the only path out. Enslaved workers weren’t fighting to be heard, they were fighting to survive. It’s also worth bearing in mind the history of abolition, which happened in Northern states first. This gave them a destination, as well as hope. 

The Generation Gap

The other thing that the texts diverge on is the relationship between parents and children. In the play, family is consistently shown to provide support and community. As the woman speaks about her father and brother, the unconditional love and support between them is palpable. However, the novel depicts a bit more conflict— Whitechapel argued with Chapel based on his lived experience, and the many young people he had seen be killed for trying to free themselves. However, Chapel was far more committed to freedom than to survival. There isn’t necessarily a ‘right’ answer either way, but this definitely isn’t a tension that we see in the play.

I discuss all these themes in further detail in A Killer Comparative Guide: The 7 Stages of Grieving & The Longest Memory . In this guide, I offer you a deep dive into these two texts through plot summaries and analyses, structural features, critical readings, and best of all, 5 sample A+ essays fully annotated so you can understand exactly how to achieve better marks in your own essays.

As with all our essay topic breakdowns, we'll follow LSG's THINK and EXECUTE technique, as taught in our How To Write A Killer Text Response . The LSG's THINK and EXECUTE technique follows three steps in the THINK phase - A nalyse, B rainstorm, and C reate a Plan. Learn more about this technique in this video:

Let's use essay topic #1 from the section below.

Compare the ways in which the two texts explore the possibility of social change.

Step 1: Analyse

‘Social change’ is a key term here, but the word ‘possibility’ also stands out to me. Social change—probably towards equality—isn’t something that just happens, so the prompt also wants us to think about how to get there, and whether that seems achievable in the contexts of these stories. The prompt is phrased as an instruction (“Compare”) which invites you to analyse both texts together, but you totally knew that already!

Step 2: Brainstorm

I’d probably start by brainstorming what exactly needs to be changed. In each text, we see institutions and structures which are violent and harmful—from the play, police and the media, and from the novel, the economy itself. However, these institutions are upheld in different ways, and require different mechanisms of change—while the play emphasises grieving and unity, the novel focuses more on emancipation.

Step 3: Create a Plan

Because we’ve got two sets of ideas for each text, let’s alternate the texts (Essay Structure 1, as discussed in How To Write A Killer Comparative ) to cover these ideas in four paragraphs.

P1: Starting with The 7 Stages of Grieving , social change is required at the institutional level. Police and the media are racially biased, and Aboriginal people aren’t given a platform to tell their stories. Reconciliation needs to include Aboriginal voices.

P2: With The Longest Memory , social change is required across the economy that depends on enslaving people and stealing their labour, while others have an economic interest in the status quo.

P3: Because of this, change seems more possible in the play, and we start seeing it happen towards the end, as the ice thaws and people, Bla(c)k and white, march across the bridge together.

P4: On the other hand, emancipation is seen as the only path to change in the novel, as intergenerational social pressures among the enslaving class in the South are insurmountable.

So our contention will probably revolve around the idea that ‘social change’ means different things in each text as social inequalities exist at different levels (Paragraph 1&2)—as such, the ‘possibilities’ for that change look different as well (P3&4), particularly the extent to which white people can be involved in that change.

If you'd like to see the sample A+ essay we wrote up for this essay topic, then you might want to check out our A Killer Comparative Guide: The 7 Stages of Grieving & The Longest Memory!

Sample Essay Topics 

Now it's your turn! Give these essay topics a go.

1. Compare the ways in which the two texts explore the possibility of social change.

2. How do The 7 Stages of Grieving and The Longest Memory present the emotional pain of racism? 

3. What do Aunty Grace and Chapel illustrate about the complexities of belonging to a racial minority?

4. Compare how the narrative structures of The 7 Stages of Grieving and The Longest Memory enhance their storytelling effect.

5. “People called him Boonie! He was known as Boonie…” (The 7 Stages of Grieving)

6. “I literally saw the boy surrender to that whip …” (The Longest Memory)  ‍

7. Compare how the two texts explore innocence.

If you're interested in reading a 50 study scorer's completed essays, along with annotations so you can understand my thinking process, then I would highly recommend checking out LSG's A Killer Comparative Guide: The 7 Stages of Grieving & The Longest Memory.

Useful Resources

How To Write A Killer Comparative study guide

The Ultimate Guide to VCE Comparative

Compare the Pair- A guide to structuring a reading and comparing essay

The link between your contention and topic sentences in relation to the prompt

‍ ‍ A Guide to Structuring a Reading and Comparing Essay

Reading and Comparing Essays

• Plot Summaries
• Themes, Motifs and Key Ideas
• LSG’s Bubble Tea (BBT) Strategy for Unique Strategies
• Structural Features Analysis
• Sample Essay Breakdown

For a detailed guide on Comparative, check out our Ultimate Guide to VCE Comparative.

1. Plot Summaries

Summary - the hate race .

Maxine Beneba Clarke’s seminal novel, The Hate Race, follows the childhood and adolescence of its author, who is the main protagonist. The book is a memoir, meaning that it is based around a recollection of her life and filtered through her psyche and experiences. The book begins with Clarke’s family, British citizens of Afro-Carribean descent, moving to Sydney, New South Wales. They settle in the town of Kellyville, which is known as a ‘white picket’ community. Although these communities largely don't exist anymore, what they once described was suburban environments where only Anglo-Australians lived. As you can probably imagine, this immediately caused problems for Clarke’s family, with suspicion from neighbours and racist interactions with other kids in the neighbourhood. Clarke initially focuses on her experiences in kindergarten, revealing how prejudice and discrimination can be inculcated (meaning, ‘taught to’) in children even from such a tender age. Clarke meets her first tormenter - Carlita Allen. Carlita makes every effort to exclude Clarke from participation in usual preschool activities, hurling insults across playgrounds and calling her ‘dirty’. Literally, of course, Carlita is referring to Clarke’s black skin colour, but, metaphorically, it reflects the deeply hateful implication that anyone with a dark complexion is inherently inferior and lesser than white Australians. The bullying doesn’t stop by the time Clarke reaches primary school. In fact, it intensifies, aided and abetted by teachers who consistently turn a blind eye to the constant, gut-wrenching racial abuse. One of the most salient (meaning, ‘important’) scenes arises when Clarke is asked by a teacher what her parents do for a living. Upon informing the teacher that her mother is an actor, and her father is a Mathematics Professor - the first British citizen of Afro-Carribean descent to attend a British university - she is met with the patronising assumption that she must be lying. Surely black people wouldn’t have the emotional and intellectual intelligence to perform such high-powered jobs? Clarke also develops eczema during her primary school years, leaving patches of lighter-coloured skin covering her face, and a newfound hope that, bit by bit, God is answering her prayers and making her white. In high school, the racist rot sets in even further. Clarke develops a new habit for scratching her skin at night to the point of bleeding and bruising. Looking back at this experience, Clarke theorises that this was her body’s way of expressing her extreme discomfort with being black. It gives us a picture of how horrific racism can truly be, and the ways in which it forces minorities into believing that there’s something wrong with them, instead of there being something wrong with the people hurling abuse in the first instance!

It is this stage of her life when Clarke deals with one of the most difficult parts of being a minority in a majority white country. Through her interactions with teachers, friends and boyfriends alike, she becomes deeply angry at those people who abhor racism themselves, but seem unable to step in when racist events are actually occurring. Clarke also deals with more nuanced experiences of racism - people who don’t intend to be racist, but end up making insensitive comments anyway. Whether intentional or not, these comments still hurt, and are still part of the challenges of growing up black in a white country. Nonetheless, Clarke continues to rise above the odds, becoming a prolific high school debater, maintaining her position at the top of the academic cohort, and forming a small but tight-knit group of friends whom she can trust. 

Clarke’s recollection of her childhood ends on a relatively abrupt note, with Clarke returning home to realise that her father has left the family for another woman. In a note to the family, he provides no explanation other than that he had a secret affair for many years. Suddenly, Clarke, her brothers, sisters and mother are left to pick up the pieces. In the epilogue, Clarke is now an adult with a child of her own. Walking down Melbourne’s North Road, she reflects on the challenges and opportunities to which her child will be witness. Clarke portrays it as the dual sadness and happiness of knowing that, in Australia, her children will surely have access to more opportunity than in most parts of the world - but it will come at a cost. Namely, they will also have to contend with the remaining undercurrent of racism that, even now, still seeps through Australian society. The unsatisfying end to the novel reflects the nature of racism and the experience of a minority growing up in a white country itself: there is no happy ending. Rather, life becomes a series of painful incidents interspersed with minor victories; those who stand up against racism, those who fail to do so and the hundreds of thousands of Australians who will forever grapple with a society that sees them as ‘ lesser than’ due to the colour of their skin. 

Summary - Charlie’s Country

Charlie’s Country , an Australian movie directed by Dutch-Australian Rolf De Heer, follows the story of Charlie, a First Nations man living in late-2000s Australia.

The movie is set in the wake of the 2007 Northern Territory Intervention. As a bit of quick context, this was an action taken by the Commonwealth Government under Coalition Prime Minister John Howard to send Australian Defence Force troops into the Northern Territory. It came in response to the ‘Little Children are Sacred’ report , which raised allegations of child sexual abuse and neglect of children in Aboriginal communities. The intervention also involved restricting alcohol consumption, quarantining a portion of welfare payments to Indigenous residents (with the justification that this would prevent it being spent on alcohol, pornography, cigarettes, etc.) and hefty fines as well as jail sentences for those forced to comply. It is important to note that, throughout the whole intervention, not a single person was prosecuted for child sexual abuse or any related offence. Nonetheless, this intervention had real world, drastic consequences - and that’s exactly what Charlie’s Country explores. At the time of de Heer’s film, Charlie lives in a remote Indigenous community. Signs of the intervention are all around - alcohol is banned from most communities, many individuals face personal bans on procuring alcohol, police officers dot the streets and citizens live under constant watch. Charlie, on a surface level, is a fairly happy-go-lucky individual; he exchanges jokes with police, is friendly with other elders and people in his community and doesn’t seem to do much else. As always with a movie like this - there’s a bigger story behind this all! Rolf de Heer takes us through an increasingly concerning image of Aboriginal communities in the wake of the intervention. Charlie visits his local housing officer and is unable to obtain a house. Here, we see that Charlie is willing to work and wants stable accommodation, but the government is unwilling to provide.

Going on a hunting trip with his friend, ‘Black Pete’, the two are stopped by police and have their guns, as well as the water buffalo they killed, confiscated. Yet again, two Indigenous men try to provide for themselves - but are stopped by a legal system more concerned with rules and procedure than listening to First Nations communities themselves. Charlie decides he’s had enough of having his every move and action monitored, and takes a stolen police car into the bush. Abandoning the car, he tries to live amongst nature for an unidentified amount of time. Cooking fish, performing traditional First Nations dances, painting on the bark and looking for shelter, Charlie finally appears to be home . Yet, as usual, it’s too good to be true - the extreme cold makes Charlie incredibly sick, and, before we know it, he wakes up in a Darwin hospital. After refusing further treatment from the white doctors who fail to understand Charlie’s situation and why he is so angry at what’s happened to him, the predictable cycle begins again: Charlie returns to his community, they all share alcohol as a way of coping with their current situation and flee when the police come running to confiscate the liquor. Charlie isn’t civil with the police this time. In a fit of anger - an outburst of emotion after decades upon decades of control and being denied access to any opportunity - he picks up a bat and smashes the police officer’s car window. Brutally beaten into submission, Charlie is imprisoned as the police officer remarks that he should never have 'gone soft on a blackfella’. 

Dragged before the courts, Charlie is imprisoned for assault. When the judge asks him to make a comment, he gives a lengthy speech in his native language. For de Heer, this acts as a symbolic assertion of the First Nations’ rights to their own culture, and a proud statement against the many governments that have continually placed barriers in the way of Indigenous Australians having the same opportunities as any one of us. Eventually, Charlie is released on parole. He expresses a deep desire to go home - but also a sense of defeat . He resolves, in the end, to believe that even if he will always live under the watchful eyes of the Australian Government, he can at least fight back and contribute by doing his bit to maintain the many cultures of our First Nations Peoples. Charlie teaches young Indigenous boys traditional dances, speaking proudly of when he performed a dancing ceremony for Queen Elizabeth in 1973 at the Sydney Opera House. The movie ends with Charlie staring mournfully into the camera, almost looking at the audience themselves. There seems to be no happiness in his eyes - nothing left but a sense of sadness and resignation. I know that, upon approaching the end of the film, I started to feel the same sadness that Charlie so evidently shows us. It’s a different type of emotion; one centered around the pain of knowing that we live in a country that still has not made peace with its past, and refuses to listen to the First Nations Peoples who know it best. Charlie’s Country exposes to us that Australia is a country where, even today, our First Nations citizens are not treated as equals. As such, de Heer’s film is a stark reminder that this state of affairs is not good enough - and that the responsibility for change doesn’t just lie with politicians and decision-makers . It’s our job too: and failure is not an option .

2. Themes, Motifs and Key Ideas

Through discussing Themes, Motifs and Key Ideas, we’ll gain a clearer understanding of some super important ideas to include in your essays. Remember that, when it comes to themes, there’s a whole host of ways you can express your ideas,  but this is what I’d suggest as the most impressive method to blow away the VCAA examiners. We’ll be adhering to the CONVERGENT and DIVERGENT strategy. While we don’t go into detail into how to use LSG’s CONVERGENT and DIVERGENT strategy in this guide, I’d highly recommend you get familiar with it by reading How To Write A Killer Comparative .

Connection to Culture (CONVERGENT)

Both de Heer and Clarke offer a unified idea around culture: that being connected to one’s culture is inherently good and positive, and should be encouraged. Let’s break this down. The Hate Race and Charlie’s Country are both works that explore the challenges of individuals maintaining their culture in surroundings which would otherwise see them revert to the ‘standard’. In this case, because we’re talking about Australia, de Heer and Clarke take us through the same story of an overarching, implicit acceptance that the Christian, Anglo way of life is the norm. This standard has deep roots in the colonisation of Australia, and the resulting claim of sovereignty by the Crown. Even as this country has evolved into a multicultural land, it still bears the marks of a ‘European’ country; whether that be our British legal system, Anglo-American democracy or any of the other institutions we have taken from the Western world.

It is in this context that de Heer and Clarke go to special lengths to explain why people should be empowered to connect to their culture. To our author and director, culture is an essential element of who you are, and it is this identity which carries people through life . For Maxine, the shock of realising that she may be the descendant of African slaves, and had lived so many years without having any idea this may be the case, is drawn from the fact that she, as a child, feels incredibly disconnected to who she is. Clarke’s memoir thus reminds us that ‘growing up black in a white country’ is an experience that often results in minority children not truly learning about who they are. Travelling through life, Maxine is continually disconnected from her culture, to the point where performing ‘African tribal dances’ to the school is nothing more than a joke. Even in her own estimation, Maxine has internalised (meaning, she’s adopted it herself) the view that her culture is irrelevant, and there’s no real reason for her to properly engage with all its complexity and beauty.

If we consider Charlie’s perspective, his involuntary burst of tears at the hospital stems from a recognition that his people have been denied the free opportunity to embrace the world’s longest-surviving culture; the First Nations traditions that date back 40,000 years. With his friend slowly dying of lung cancer, at that moment, the old man is more connected to the cigarettes that slowly sapped his life away than he is to the First Nations way of living. Unable to hunt, gather as a community, work the lands as the First Nations traditionally would or embark on any other activity that would keep them connected to their culture, this country’s first inhabitants are instead told to abandon ‘the old ways’ and embrace Anglocentric standards of life.

It is a shocking reminder that, without culture, people are left like driftwood swimming through a vast ocean. By that, I mean that people are left without an anchor through which they can independently experience the world. Instead, their understanding of themselves, their sense of self and their actions in life are all filtered through the preferences of the dominant majority.

Intergenerational Disadvantage (DIVERGENT)

Whilst Charlie’s Country and The Hate Race share many similarities in terms of the negative impacts of racism and prejudice, the texts carry different connotations when it comes to the notion of intergenerational disadvantage. 

To explain this idea, let’s first define and unpack ‘intergenerational disadvantage’. We could spend days talking about this, but, simply, intergenerational disadvantage refers to cycles of poverty and criminality that pass from generation to generation, worsening with time. Think of it this way: assume you’re a teenager - or at least still financially reliant on your parents. If your parents were to lose everything they owned today in a massive financial crisis, you’d be in big trouble too, right? Suddenly, that part-time job you had that was helping you save money might be the only income for the entire family. You might even have to drop out of school, TAFE or university to care for everyone, denying you a higher paying job in the future. 

You’ll have to work your tail off for years on end. Since you’re supporting an entire family, say goodbye to saving up for a house or to pay for your kid’s education in future. Your kids now have to start from square one with less opportunity than the people around them, meaning it’ll be harder for them to succeed in life.

When we apply this to Charlie’s Country, the analogy becomes quite clear. Charlie lives in a community where there is no opportunity. Because there are no jobs - and no real way to gain steady, meaningful employment - people fall into alcoholism, marijuana and anything else that’ll help them cope. Lung cancer and alcoholism shorten lifespans for people like the old man with failing kidneys, while no employer is going to waste a chance on those still living. There is simply no ability to ‘succeed’ here, because the local residents don’t see that there’s anything worth working towards. Hopeless, unheard and disillusioned, it becomes easier for Charlie’s community to just accept their sorry lot in life than futilely work towards changing it.

We aren’t made witness to this same cycle in The Hate Race. Instead, Bordeaux Clarke is the epitome of someone who has broken the cycle of intergenerational disadvantage; becoming the first individual in his community to attend a British university. Marrying a high-powered Guyanese actress in Cleopatra, the married couple represent success and a defiance of racist stereotypes, not the grinding poverty and disadvantage we see in Charlie’s Country. Although Maxine experiences terrible discrimination and prejudice as a child, there is always a sense that she will academically remain on top. Maxine uses the prejudice with which she’s faced as a motivator, giving her the impetus to consistently emerge successful; whether that be in her schooling, cross-country running, as a debater or any other academic endeavour. Sure, she faces racism that inhibits her from always succeeding - the Lions Club competition is a great example of such - but this isn’t so much about intergenerational disadvantage as it is about racism, plain and simple.

Ultimately, the difference between the two is a matter of emphasis. It’s not that intergenerational disadvantage doesn’t exist in The Hate Race, but more so that Clarke is choosing to focus on how even the most successful individuals can suffer from prejudice and racism. This in turn helps us to understand that racism impacts everyone , and we should never pretend it isn’t a massive problem. Conversely, Charlie’s Country is all about social disadvantage, and explores how prejudice can prevent oppressed individuals from becoming successful in the first place. 

3. LSG’s Bubble Tea (BBT) Strategy for Unique Strategies

Why is an interpretation important.

Your interpretation is what English is all about; it’s about getting you to think critically about the essay topic at hand, to formulate a contention (agree, disagree, or sit on the fence) and argue each of your points with the best pieces of evidence you can find - and it’s something you might already be starting to do naturally.

In this section, we aim to help you develop your own interpretation of the text, rather than relying on your teacher, tutor or even a study guide (including this one) author’s interpretation. By developing your own interpretation, you become a better English student by:

• Writing with meaning. For a text to be interpreted, you need a text and an interpreter (i.e. you!). Whenever we read a new text, our interpretation of a text is shaped by our pre-existing beliefs, knowledge and expectations. This should be reassuring because it means that you can leverage your own life experiences in developing a unique interpretation of the text! We’ll show you how this works in the next point.
• Remembering evidence (quotes or literary devices) more easily. If you know you admire a character for example (which is in itself an interpretation 😉), you can probably remember why you admire them. Perhaps the character’s selflessness reminds you of your Dad (see how you’re using real life experiences mentioned in Point 1 to develop an interpretation of the text?). You will then more easily recall something the character said or did in the text (i.e. evidence) that made you admire them.
• Having an analysis ready to use alongside the evidence. As a result of Point 2 , you’ll be able to write a few sentences based on your own interpretation. Rather than memorising entire essays ( we’ve talked about this before ) and regurgitating information from teachers, tutors, study guides and other resources - which can be labour intensive and actually detract from the originality of your essay - you’re approaching the essay with your own thoughts and opinions (which you can reuse over and over again across different essay topics).

Let’s look on the flip side. What happens when you don’t have your own interpretation?

When you don’t take the time to actively think for yourself - i.e. to think through your own interpretations (we’ve talked about the importance of THINK in the THINK and EXECUTE strategy here ) - when it finally comes to writing an essay, you may find it difficult:

a) to get started - formulating a contention in response to the essay topic is challenging because you have no strong opinion about the text ,

b) complete the essay - writing up arguments and using evidence in paragraphs becomes challenging because you have no strong opinion about the text ,

c) to score higher marks - ultimately, you end up regurgitating other people’s ideas (your teacher’s, tutor’s or from study guides) because you have (you guessed it) no strong opinion on the text .

Having your own interpretation means that you’ll eliminate issues a, b and c from above. Overall, you’ll have opinions (and therefore contentions) ready for any prompt when you go into your SACs or exams, which means it’ll be easier not only to write a full essay, but an original and insightful one as well.

To overcome the issues above, you need to be confident with your own interpretation of the text. This doesn’t come naturally to a lot of students, and it makes sense why. After all, so many subjects reward specific answers (2 + 2 = 4), whereas English is tricky because there’s so much more flexibility in what constitutes a ‘correct answer’. It’s scary treading the sea of different possible interpretations because you’ll ask yourself questions like:

• How do I know if my interpretation is correct?
• How do I know if my evidence actually backs up what I’m arguing?
• What if I disagree with my teacher, and they mark me down for a differing opinion?
• Or worse - I’m not smart enough to come up with my own interpretation!

Let me say that you are absolutely smart enough to develop your own interpretation, and I’ll show you how to do so in A Killer Comparative Guide: The Hate Race & Charlie’s Country with LSG’s unique strategy - the BUBBLE TEA (BBT) strategy . By following our step-by-step framework, you can be confident that your interpretation is valid, that it backs up your argument, and that most importantly, you won’t lose marks for it!

4. Structural Features Analysis

In How To Write A Killer Text Response , we cover Metalanguage . A Structural Features Analysis and Comparison goes over a lot of the same material, and will help elevate your essays to the next level. Knowing quotes and themes is essential, but being able to pair that with analysis of the title, setting, narrator and overall structure - we'll cover title here - shows the examiner that you really know exactly what you’re talking about. This section will be especially crucial for metalanguage topics that are all about how Charlie’s Country and The Hate Race are structured , so, enjoy!

The title of a text is always significant - and this text pairing is no different. First, of course, please do keep in mind that there is no universally accurate interpretation of what a title means. I’m giving you my assessment, but the author and director could very well disagree themselves! That’s okay, because as long as we back it up properly, your interpretation is as valid as any. As always, that’s the beauty of English. Let’s first unpack The Hate Race. What this title signifies is that, for minorities in Australia, life is constantly akin to a race. There is no rest, no comfort and no sense of home when your mind is preoccupied with all the ways you don’t belong. Australia, as a colonial outpost representing the Crown in a region that is overwhelmingly non-white, was once proud of its discriminatory stances; holding itself as the 'White Man’s Paradise'. It is in this context that racism, for Clarke, is not just a reality that lurks beneath the surface, but rather, a guiding tenet of Australia since 1788. With this overarching narrative, it is also important to acknowledge that the mere experience of racism is immensely emotionally, physically and mentally taxing for Clarke, and all people of colour. Being denied a firm sense of self, and constantly being forced to justify one’s own existence isn’t easy, and becomes a ‘race against time’ to see who can cope and rise above, and who will be swept away along with the tide. This sorrowful reality is what engenders the never ending race against being consumed by such hatred, because, for non-white Australians, there simply is no other choice. If they stop running, they run the risk of being consumed by the hatred themselves and becoming so cynical and disillusioned that they forget their culture and accede to the Anglocentric, white majority. 

Moving to de Heer’s film, Charlie’s Country, the title reflects a simple reality: this is Charlie’s country. However, when de Heer speaks of ‘country’, he is really talking about ‘Country’; the Indigenous notion of connection to and respect for one’s traditional lands. Nurturing this connection is a sacred responsibility, and the film reminds us that, despite Charlie’s many trials and tribulations, the land on which he lives is truly his own. Throughout the film, Charlie maintains a keen awareness that what is happening to him is unjust, and, unlike Maxine, he doesn’t need someone to convince him that he belongs. Whatever Anglo Australia does, it cannot change the continuing legacy of his people and their sovereignty. To Charlie, it is laughable to think that his Country - which the First Nations have nurtured and kept in common use for 40,000 years - could suddenly become someone else’s property in less than 200 years. He may not have any legal authority under the Crown, and his people may be dispossessed of their sovereignty and authority, but this cannot and will not change the remaining truth of First Nations sovereignty. De Heer’s film title thus challenges us to confront our own perceptions of Australia and remember that we all live on stolen land.

As with all our essay topic breakdowns, we'll follow LSG's THINK and EXECUTE strategy , as taught in our How To Write A Killer Text Response study guide. The LSG's THINK and EXECUTE strategy follows three steps in the THINK phase - A nalyse, B rainstorm, and C reate a Plan. Learn more about this technique in this video:

'I’m free now!' ( Charlie’s Country ) 'My children are the descendants of the unbroken.' ( The Hate Race ) Compare the characters’ understanding of freedom in the two texts.

Let’s break down the prompt. This is a quote-based prompt, meaning the quote must feature somewhere in your essay . Ensure that you have a good understanding of the place from which the quote is drawn. In this case, Charlie’s exclamation of joy features when he escapes to the wilderness and is able to cook, dance and provide for himself. The quote from The Hate Race is the last line of the memoir, with Clarke expressing the sentiment that her children belong in Australia and will be as strong as their parents.

The next part is to establish the link between the quote and the topic. The essay topic at hand asks us how 'freedom' is understood, so we need to actually understand freedom itself in relation to the quotes provided. For de Heer and Clarke, freedom isn’t an abstract concept relating to rights, liberties and responsibilities. Rather, freedom is found when people have the ability to be themselves, own their culture and live their truth. For Charlie, that mainly relates to his right to live in his country and maintain the traditional ways of the First Nations Peoples. Clarke, however, is more focused on the balancing act of finding freedom through a multicultural society that includes all, and in doing so celebrates the contribution that all cultures make into the melting pot that is Australia.

There’s no one correct way to structure your paragraphs for Charlie’s Country and The Hate Race . However, I find it consistently helpful to follow a chronological structure. This refers to going through events of the memoir and film in the order they actually occur, and finding unique points of analysis based around these chronological groupings.  

We also need to think of examples and points of comparison. Base these around the themes we’ve gone through, so you can easily identify DIVERGENT and CONVERGENT points of comparison. I’ll walk you through my thinking.

Paragraph 1 – unable to experience freedom because systems exist to stop individuals from embracing their own culture

• Kellyville and Alice Springs are immediately established as communities where rules and standards of association are both made and enforced by white authorities. The types of authorities and the prevalence of this overarching system of control differs between The Hate Race and Charlie’s Country , but are not any less harmful.

Paragraph 2 – attempts at pushback are rebuffed, resulting in further punishment for the simple crime of failing to conform

• Anglo Australia maintains its dominance through an assumption that minority Australians and First Nations Peoples will not question their place. Thus, when there is even the smallest semblance of resistance, punishment is the only solution. 
• The difference here is that while Charlie wages an active resistance against white authorities, Maxine is moreso placed into submission by the repeated failure of her pleas to be heard by anyone in a position to change what is occurring. At the centre of both situations, though, is a desire to break free of white Australia’s chains.

Paragraph 3 – finding cultural freedom is a slow process of change, but one that begins with self acceptance

• There is no happy ending to either The Hate Race or Charlie’s Country. Freedom does not suddenly spring forth. Instead, our author and director elucidate that cultivating freedom is a slow process. For Charlie, that begins with embracing his culture again and seeking to keep it alive. On Maxine’s part, it is about refusing to be broken by her past, and instead using her trauma as a motivator to build a better future.

If you'd like to see the sample A+ essay we wrote up for this essay topic, then you might want to check out our A Killer Comparative Guide: The Hate Race & Charlie's Country study guide !

We’ve explored historical context, themes, essay planning and essay topics over on our Like a House on Fire by Cate Kennedy blog post. If you need a quick refresher or you’re new to studying this text, I highly recommend checking it out!

[Video Transcript]

‘Liz sits there helpless’

• From the beginning of the short story we can see that Liz isn’t, or doesn’t feel in control of her situation. The step by step process where she needs to ‘put the key in the ignition and turn it. Fire up the car and drive away’ showcases how the smallest details of starting the car, something that should be so simple instead requires immense mental effort on her behalf.

‘And he’s in there, alone, where she’s left him’.

• Her guilt bubbles to the surface here because it’s as though she’s the villain here, and she’s to blame for leaving him alone.

‘Abandoned him to a roomful of rampaging strangers’

• What’s really interesting here is her description of the other children. Instead of seeing this as an opportunity for Daniel to befriend others and have a great time, she describes them as ‘rampaging strangers’, giving us a sense that Daniel is subject to an unfamiliar environment that is wild, frenzied, rioting.

“Guerilla warfare”, “Jungle gym”, "seasoned commanders”

• These "fighter” phrases reveal Liz’s anxious mindset, as she imagines a world where her son is almost in the wilderness, every man for himself, as though it’s the survival of the fittest - and which Liz so fearfully express, “not that there’s going to be anybody with enough time to notice that Daniel needs help”, is not an environment where Daniel belongs.

“She digs in her bag for her lipstick, her fingers searching for the small cylinder, and pulls out a crayon, then a battery, then a tampon, then a gluestick.”

• Her everyday objects are splashed with Daniel’s belongings - the crayon, the gluestick, and demonstrate how intertwined her life is now with her child. This foreshadows her return to her pre-baby life - that things will not be the same.

“The smell of the place, that’s what throws her, the scent of it all, adult perfumes, air breathed out by computers and printers and photocopiers.”

• Even her sense of smell betrays her being away from Daniel. There’s a sense of alienation, of nausea that shows readers like us that Liz doesn’t feel like she belongs. This is in contrast to later in the story when she is reunited with Daniel and is comforted by ‘inhaling[ing] the scent of him again’.

“Same computer, same shiny worn spot on the space bar…"

• The repetition of ’same’ actually heightens how much has actually changed for Liz. Her entire world is now Daniel, whereas everything in the office is as it used to be. Therefore, there’s this sense that the people’s lives in the office remain unchanged, highlighting again Liz’s alienation.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, they’re right, of course they are.”

• This sarcastic internal monologue reflects Liz’s current state of mind, where she’s experiencing a disconnect from her coworkers, and ’the land of the living’.

"Delete, she presses. Punching the key like a bird pecking. Delete, delete, delete.”

• We can feel Liz’s exasperation at this stage. The simile ‘like a bird pecking’ automates Liz’s actions in the workplace, as though she is doing it by switching to a ‘mechanical form’ of herself. The repetition of ‘delete, delete, delete’ gives us the sense that she’s frustratingly attempting to ‘delete’ her self-acknowledged, perhaps over-the-top anxiety surrounding Daniel, or trying to delete herself out of her situation. Whichever is unclear and left up to interpretation. Perhaps both ring true.

‘Returning to work after maternity leave’

• Liz’s narrative interspersed with new mum’s pamphlet. The juxtaposition of the pamphlet’s words ‘being a stay-at-home mum can begin to seem mundane and repetitive’ is contrasted with Liz’s love of motherhood - she is at odds with what society tells her she should be feeling.

‘[Daniel]’d have his thumb in his mouth right now. Not smiling, that’s for sure.’

• There’s a self-projection of anxiety here with Liz  assuming that the childcarers are unable to look after Daniel properly, and that he’s suffering.

‘God, these endless extended moments where you’re left in limbo, the time dangling like a suspended toy on a piece of elastic.’

• This simile highlights how her mindset is completely consumed with Daniel, as she likens her daily experiences with objects and things related to Daniel and childhood. She struggles to switch between her identity as a mother, and her previous identity as a colleague in the workplace.

‘Caroline, Julie and Stella had laughed dutifully enough, but their faces had shown a kind of pained disappointment, something faintly aggrieved.’

• Perhaps this is Cate Kennedy's commentary on society and motherhood. The expectations others have on you as a new mother, and how you should be feeling.

‘He doesn’t run over when he sees her’.

• The opening of this chapter is blunt and brutal. Liz has longed to see Daniel all day, her anxiety getting the best of her, and yet at the moment of their reunion, it’s not as she expects. In this sense, we can to feel that Liz is very much alone in her anxiety and despair and, not the other way around with Daniel.

’She’s fighting a terrible nausea, feeling the sweat in the small of her back.’

• Unlike other stories in this collection, her pain isn’t because the absence of love, but because of its strength. Her love for Daniel is so intense that it’s physiological, making her unwell to have been away from him.

• The symbol of cake represents her pre-baby life, a time when she was concerned with the ‘account of Henderson’s’ and ‘delete fourth Excel column’. Her priorities have now shifted, and the celebrated ‘cake’ tradition in the workplace, one that is at the centre of several conversations, is no longer to significance to Liz. Her husband, Andrew’s attempt to celebrate Liz’s first day back at work with cake is highly ironic. The societal expectation that Liz is happy to be back at work even extends to her husband, and heightens how Liz is very much alone in her experience.

If you found this close analysis helpful, then you might want to check out our Like a House on Fire Study Guide where we analyse EVERY story in the text and pinpoint key quotes and symbols!

Watch our YouTube Video on Like A House On Fire Essay Topic and Body Paragraphs Breakdown

Like a House on Fire by Cate Kennedy

Like a House on Fire Essay Topic Breakdown

How To Get An A+ On Your Like A House On Fire Essay

Close Analysis Of 'Cake' From Like A House On Fire

Passage 1: Act 1 Scene 3

   [Aside] Two truths are told,

   As happy prologues to the swelling act

   Of the imperial theme.--I thank you, gentlemen.

[Aside] This supernatural soliciting

   Cannot be ill, cannot be good: if ill,

   Why hath it given me earnest of success,

   Commencing in a truth? I am thane of Cawdor:

   If good, why do I yield to that suggestion

   Whose horrid image doth unfix my hair

   And make my seated heart knock at my ribs,

   Against the use of nature? Present fears

   Are less than horrible imaginings:

   My thought, whose murder yet is but fantastical,  

   Shakes so my single state of man that function

   Is smother'd in surmise, and nothing is

   But what is not.

Passage One from Act 1 Scene 3 takes place just after Macbeth has just been announced as Thane of Cawdor proving part of the Witches’ prophecy true “All hail Macbeth…Thane of Cawdor…/that shalt be king hereafter.” This part of the play is the first insight we have on Macbeth’s inner thoughts.  

Macbeth’s firm and thoughtful tone in the opening alliteration “two truths are told ” stresses how serious he takes the Witches’ predictions. Shakespeare presents this passage as a soliloquy in order to convey Macbeth’s true inner thoughts and motives. As this is Macbeth’s first soliloquy, it emphasises the strong possibility of Macbeth heading down a dark journey as he cannot forget the Witches’ predictions “(it) cannot be ill, cannot be good. If ill, / Why hath it given me earnest of success, Commencing in a truth?”

Shakespeare uses the metaphor of theatre for fate . The meta-theatrical reference, ‘as happy prologues to the swelling act’ makes the audience consider the action that will unfold in the following scenes through foreshadowing.

Macbeth feels that committing regicide will be a “supernatural soliciting”. The word “supernatural” demonstrates that Macbeth acknowledges that such an act is “against the use of nature.” It suggests that if Macbeth kills Duncan, he will forever be trapped in the supernatural world for his dishonourable action. The alliteration of “supernatural soliciting” sounds incredibly seductive, and therefore highlights Macbeth’s lust and thirst for the crown.

There is a physiological response to his unnerving thoughts as the ‘horrid image doth unfix my hair’ and ‘my seated heart knock at my ribs’ , emphasising the horror of Macbeth has with himself  at his thoughts.

The personification “my seated heart knock at my ribs” once again depicts the increasing fear that Macbeth experiences as his heart is not “seated” with its connotations of calmness and steadiness but “knock(ing)” which is associated with alarming fear.

As Macbeth struggles with his conscience and fears “my thought, whose murder yet is but fantastical,/ Shakes so my single state of man,”  he is uncertain whether or not he should take the prophecy into his own hands and murder Duncan or, let time decide his fate “time and the hour runs through the roughest day”. The consonance ’s’, Shakes so my single state of man”.. ‍

The alliteration “smothered in surmise” demonstrates how Macbeth’s vivid imagination causes him to struggle with fear and hesitate undergoing the action that is foreseen by him as a “horrid image.” These mental images are of significance throughout the play as it is evident that Macbeth’ conscience results in him “seeing” a dagger and also Banquo’s ghost.

The antithesis “and nothing is,/ But what is not” is deliberately broken up into two lines to demonstrate the ambiguity of Macbeth’s thoughts and the confusion which evidently contributes to his overall fear. Macbeth’s actions become overpowered by his imagination until ‘nothing is but what is not’ or imagination carries more weight than action. The partial alliteration of ‘smother’d in surmise’ and the antithesis of ‘nothing is but what is not’ makes this notion seem again, particularly seductive to the audience. The word ‘smother’d’ , with it’s connotations of oppression, further amplifies the notion and even suggests that Macbeth’s imagination takes the place of his will.

Many students receive feedback from teachers to ‘avoid retelling the story’ along with red scribbles across their essay that state, ‘paragraph needs further development’ or ‘develop your contention further’. It’s a common issue across the VCE cohort and fixing it does take some time and practice. However, keep in mind that it is definitely possible, you just have to understand what exactly what ‘retelling the story’ means!

So, ‘retelling the story’ – it’s pretty much stated right there the phrase – it’s when you are re-describing or repeating the plot based on whichever text you’re writing on. The reason why it is so cringe-worthy is because: 1. you should assume that your teacher or examiner has already read the book before so they don’t need a summary of the events occurring in the text, and 2. you are wasting time by writing something probably a year 8 student could when instead, you should focus your time on providing a comprehensive analysis of the text when responding to your essay topic.

Here is an example of a student who ‘retells the story’ (using Reginald Rose’s  Twelve Angry Men  – “Twelve Angry Men explores the importance of moral responsibility. Discuss.”):

“The importance of moral responsibility is shown through those who fail to possess any sense of decency or righteousness. The 3rd juror has had an estranged relationship with his son for 2 years. He does not get along with his son since the son is disrespectful to his father. This is unlike the 3rd juror, who used to show respect to his elders by calling his father ‘sir’ going up. He is ashamed of his son since his son once ran away from a fight which made the 3rd juror ‘almost thr[o]w up’. As a result of his personal problems with his child, he sees the defendant as another young kid that needs punishment for his wrongdoings. He believes that ‘we’d be better off if we took these tough kids and slapped ’em down before they make trouble, you know?’. Since he is blinded by his own experience, he lacks the moral responsibility required to be a juror on the trial.”

As you can see, the student above has provided a lengthy explanation of the plot, rather than focusing on the keywords. ‘moral responsibility’, ‘decency’ and ‘righteousness’. The student could easily have cut down on the plot details and used the essential events in the play to act as the basis of his/her analysis. So what are the things you can do in order to provide an insightful passage without falling into the trap of this major English student faux pas? Let’s have a look.

Remember that an essay is based on your interpretation of the prompt – that is, whether or not you agree or disagree with the essay topic. Since you are putting forth a contention, it is important that you try to convince the reader of your own point of view. Unfortunately, this is not possible through merely summarising the plot. Try to break down themes, characters, views and values and language construction when elaborating on your contention. By using your own words to explain an idea, you can then successfully use the book as  support  for your reasoning.

Remember that  repeating  the plot is  not the same as  analysing  a plot. Some students rely heavily on quotes, but this in itself can become a repetition of what occurs in the novel. Never simply rely on quotes to tell the reader what you want to say; quotes are there again for support  and so, use quotes as a basis of interpreting your own opinions and views. Keep this in mind,  don’t tell me what I already know, tell me something I’d like to learn . This will force you to write about your own ideas, rather than repeating the author’s words. Concentrate on a specific section of a plot, or a small passage in the novel. Avoid talking about too much at once. If you are able to achieve this, it will prevent you from falling into the path of wanting to write about an overall event of the book, which is inevitably summarising the plot.If you believe that it is absolutely necessary to write about some of the plot in your essay body paragraphs, try to keep it to a minimum. Practice expressing the vital plot points in one phrase, rather than using 2 or 3 sentences to explain what occurs in the book.

Now let’s have a look at the example below. The discussion is based on the same topic sentence as that above however this time, the student has focused on developing their ideas into an insightful exploration:

“The importance of moral responsibility is shown through those who fail to possess any sense of decency or righteousness. The 3rd juror is shown to be someone who is arrogant and narrow-minded as a direct result of a troubled relationship with his own son. Although he is personally unacquainted with the defendant, he draws a parallel between the youngster with his own young son, stating that ‘we’d be better off if we took these tough kids and slapped ’em down before they make trouble, you know?’. It is ironic when he asserts that ‘everybody deserves a fair trial’ since he is the juror that adopts the most prejudice towards the case, thus demonstrating his failure to possess righteousness. His shortcomings are further highlighted through the stage directions whereby he ‘shouts’ and ‘leap(s) into the breach’, displaying his lack of interest in other jurors’ opinions as he is adamant that his view that the defendant is guilty is indeed, correct. Therefore, it is clear through his narrow-mindedness that he has little sense of moral responsibility.”

2. Characters

5. Sample Essay Topics

6. A+ Essay Topic Breakdown

Station Eleven is usually studied in the Australian curriculum under Area of Study 1 - Text Response. For a detailed guide on Text Response, check out our Ultimate Guide to VCE Text Response .

“Twenty years after the end of air travel, the caravans of the Travelling Symphony moved slowly under a white-hot sky.”

When you think about post-apocalyptic science fiction stories, what kind of thing comes to mind first? Maybe an alien invasion, Pacific Rim style monsters perhaps, and almost always the mad scramble of a protagonist to stockpile resources and protect their loved ones from the imminent chaos and destruction—these are tropes which are tried and tested in this genre.

What mightn’t come to mind as immediately is a story about a travelling Shakespeare troupe wandering the North American continent decades after the actual apocalypse has struck, which is exactly the story that Mandel tells in Station Eleven .

While post-apocalyptic tales tend to focus on the action around the impact of a fictional disaster, Mandel’s novel speaks to the attitudes and characteristics of people which drive any action that occurs. She interrogates central questions about human society, inviting readers to consider what human qualities can endure even an apocalypse, what qualities are timeless.

A tale of two timelines: part one

“…once we’re seen, that’s not enough anymore. After that, we want to be remembered.”

Part of the novel’s ambition is that while it’s set 20 years after the apocalyptic Georgia Flu, it constantly reaches decades into the past to search for meaning. In particular, the novel’s central character is Arthur Leander , an actor whose death coincides with the breakout of the Flu. Tracing his origins from obscurity to fame, Mandel juxtaposes his philandering and untrustworthy behaviour with repeated attempts to be a better person, or perhaps just be more true to himself, before his death. We’ll eventually see that many of his actions have consequences years into the future.

Arguably equally important in legacy is his first wife, Miranda Carroll , whose comics lend the novel its title. Take this with a grain of salt—she’s kind of my favourite character—but the time and energy she invests in the Station Eleven comics are arguably the most valuable investment of the novel. Her comics survive her in the years following the Flu, and are a source of escape and purpose for others just as they had been for herself.

Both of these characters come into contact with Jeevan Chaudhary , a paparazzo and journalist who regularly follows Arthur though his career, photographing Miranda in a vulnerable moment before her divorce, and booking an interview with Arthur years later as he plans to leave his second wife Elizabeth Colton . We see Jeevan struggle with his purpose in life throughout the novel, though it can be said that he ultimately finds it after the Flu, when he is working as a medic.

Finally, there’s Clark Thompson , Arthur’s friend from college who remains loyal, though not necessarily uncritical, of him all throughout his life. As the Flu first arrives in America, Clark is just leaving for Toronto, but a Flu outbreak there causes his flight to be redirected to Severn City Airport, where he and others miraculously survive in what will become a key setting of the novel.

A tale of two timelines: part two

‍ “I stood looking over my damaged home and tried to forget the sweetness of life on Earth.”

All of this finally puts us in a position to think analytically about characters in the ‘present’ timeline, that is, 20 years after the Flu. We experience the present mostly through the perspective of Kirsten Raymonde , a performer who survived the Flu as a young child. Because she was so young when it happened, many of the traumas she experienced have been erased by her mind, and she struggles to piece together what she lost in a quest for identity and meaning, largely driven by her vague memories of Arthur. She travels with the Travelling Symphony with others such as Alexandra , August and the conductor —they have collectively adopted the motto, “survival is insufficient.”

Through the story, they are pursued by the prophet , later revealed to be Tyler Leander , the child of Arthur and Elizabeth who survived and grew up in the decades following the Flu outbreak. A religious extremist, he becomes the leader of a cult of fanatics who amass weapons and conquer towns by force. Both Kirsten and Tyler pursue the Station Eleven comics, quoted above—they each possess a copy, and resonate strongly with the struggles of the characters created by Miranda.

(CW: suicide) Also important is Jeevan’s brother, Frank , a paraplegic author who was writing about a philanthropist in the last days before his death, whereby he kills himself so as to give his brother a better chance of surviving. While he isn’t a particularly major character, his writing on morality and mortality (quoted with the first batch of characters) are symbolically and thematically important.

By the way, to download a PDF version of this blog for printing or offline use, click here !

“That’s what passes for a life…that’s what passes for happiness, for most people…they’re like sleepwalkers…”

These characters already speak to some of the major themes that formulate the novel. On one hand, Mandel explores various meanings of contemporary or modern civilisation . We live in a technology-driven age where constraints of time and space mean less than ever before. For example, people are mobile through space thanks to airplanes and telephones, and the internet means that any and all information is available to anyone, all the time. Mandel constantly looks back at this society and describes it in terms of our technology: for example, “the era when it was possible to press a series of buttons on a telephone and speak with someone on the far side of the earth.” On one level, she comments on how many of these minor miracles are taken for granted in our every day lives.

On another level, these elements of society also give rise to the culture of celebrity in our lives, as high-profile figures are put under increasing pressure to maintain appearances at all times, and lead increasingly ‘perfect’ lives as a result. These were pressures that Arthur struggled to live up to, and his “failed marriages” accompanied his career at all stages. The flip side of this is that people who follow celebrities, such as Jeevan, lead increasingly emptier and more vacuous lives—and Jeevan is well-aware of this, telling Miranda that he doesn’t seek a greater purpose in life beyond making money. This lack of purpose, this ennui, is something that tints much of society through the eyes of Mandel.

Another major theme which the lives of these characters start to explore is the value of art as a source of purpose. While civilisation is portrayed as fragile and meaningless, art—in all its forms, including creating, reproducing, performing and consuming—is a way for people such as Miranda to understand, process and escape their lives. This theme is arguably the most important, as it tethers different parts of the novel together; even after the apocalypse, people turn to art as a way of understanding and connecting to others as well as to themselves.

‍ “The more you remember, the more you’ve lost.”

Inevitably with this genre, survival and mortality are major themes, as massive populations of people have died and continue to die due to the impacts of the Georgia Flu. To some extent, survivor’s guilt motivates many to search for a deeper meaning to their survival, hence the motto of the Symphony. It also drives them to turn to art as we’ve explored, since bare subsistence isn’t enough to give their lives the meaning they desire. Maybe this is what it means to be human.

On the other hand, the Flu also turns others to religious extremity , as is the case with Elizabeth, Tyler and the rest of their cult. This speaks to broader ideas about faith , fate and spirituality —are there greater forces out there who manipulate events in our world? Certainly, there are enough coincidences in the novel for this theory to be valid; even just Kirsten and Tyler both having copies of Station Eleven and both acting under the influence of Arthur is so coincidental.

However, perhaps the most important theme here is memory . Mandel ultimately puts this as the central question to readers: is memory more of a blessing or a burden? Is it preferable to remember everything you’ve lost, or be ignorant of it all? I’m not sure she really answers this one, to be honest. Various symbols—and even the constantly shifting narrative perspective—evoke the epic sense of loss in the apocalypse, and yet encountering characters like Alexandra, who never really knew what the internet was, makes you rethink that loss; perhaps it is better to have experienced the internet at all.

‍ “People want what was best about the world”

There’s a category of symbols in the novel that represent memories of technology. Consider the discarded phones and credit cards in the Museum of Civilisations, all mementos of what the world lost. Note that, given Mandel’s ambivalent commentary about modern society, not all that was lost is bad—the credit card embodies the materialism and consumerism that drive our world today, and shedding it may be construed as a form of liberty, in fact.

It is airplanes , however, that serve as the greatest reminder. Their sudden disappearance from the sky becomes a constant reminder of how the world changed, and people still look up in the hopes of seeing an airborne plane; they cling onto the hope that maybe, just maybe, all of this can somehow be reversed. The last flights of the human race—pilots attempting to return home to be with their loved ones—are also made in hope, though their outcomes are consistently unclear.

In this sense, airplanes can also be seen as a source of fading hope, or rather, despair. For one, it was the very mobility afforded by planes which caused the Flu to spread around the world so rapidly. Now, confined to the ground forever, they represent the immobility of humans in the present. They also take on meanings of death, and in particular, the final airplane that landed at Severn City Airport, quarantined with people still on board, represents the difficult decisions that have to be made in order to survive. The mausoleum plane also pushes Tyler further into religious extremism, as he reads the bible to the now-artefact in an attempt to justify the deaths of everyone on board.

These symbols highlight the jarring difference between the world before and after the Flu, but on the other hand, there are also symbols which connect the two worlds; the importance of print cannot be underemphasised here. Anything that was printed—photographs, comics, TV guides, books—are all enduring sources of knowledge and comfort for Flu survivors, and basically become the only way for children born after the Flu to remember our world, a world that they never actually lived in.

The following essay topics are extracted from our Station Eleven Study Guide: A Killer Text Guide:

• “First, we only want to be seen, but once we’re seen, that’s not enough anymore. After that, we want to be remembered.” Characters from Station Eleven who die with the Georgia Flu are immortalised in memories, also greatly influencing events two decades later. Discuss.
• Explore the perspectives offered in Station Eleven regarding survival.
• How does St John Mandel highlight the degree of losses caused by the Georgia Flu?
• Kirsten and Tyler are more similar than they are different. To what extent do you agree?
• The use of shifting narrative perspective in Station Eleven is crucial to its storytelling effect. Discuss. ‍
• Station Eleven suggests that beauty can be found in unlikely places. Do you agree?
• Some forms of technology have been rendered unusable in Station Eleven ’s Year Twenty—discuss the new purpose/s of these forms of technology.
• The memories of characters in Station Eleven ’s Year Twenty have been distorted over time. Is this true?
• It is impossible to feel any sympathy for the prophet. To what extent do you agree?
• “God, why won’t our phones work? I so wish I could tweet this…just chilling with Arthur Leander’s kid at the end of the world.” Station Eleven is a critique of modern society’s obsession with celebrity. Discuss.
• How do various forms of art play a central role in Station Eleven ?
• Fame and anonymity are shown to be equally intoxicating in Station Eleven . Do you agree? ‍
• Station Eleven demonstrates that events that seem insignificant can have remarkable consequences in the future. Discuss.
• Throughout Station Eleven ’s various timelines, innocence is always inevitably lost. Is this a fair statement?
• Arthur Leander and his son are equally contemptible yet tragic at the same time. Do you agree?

Head over to our Station Eleven Study Guide for more sample essay topics, so you can practice writing essays using the analysis you've learnt from this blog!

A+ Essay Topic Breakdown

Whenever you get a new essay topic, you can use LSG’s THINK and EXECUTE strategy , a technique to help you write better VCE essays. This essay topic breakdown will focus on the THINK part of the strategy. If you’re unfamiliar with this strategy, then check it out in How To Write A Killer Text Response .

Within the THINK strategy, we have 3 steps, or ABC. These ABC components are:

Step 1: A nalyse

Step 2: B rainstorm

Step 3: C reate a Plan

Have a watch of this video to see how we broke down an essay topic:

Although this is something that might be a little more text-specific, the main takeaway of today’s video is to be flexible in how you mentally arrange a text’s plot. This is especially handy in stories that are non-linear, so stories that flip between perspectives or timelines, as this one does. Being across a text like this will give you greater flexibility in putting together your ideas. I think this might be clearer if I just show you!

In the meantime though, let’s have a bit of a chat about the text.

Station Eleven is Emily St John Mandel’s take on the tried-and-tested sub-genre of post-apocalyptic science fiction. Only, her attempt doesn’t actually explore new forms of technology, nor the immediate action-packed grab-and-dash that we normally associate with an apocalypse. Instead, she takes us two decades down the track to look at how human society has changed as a result. She also highlights some elements of society that are eternal and timeless, that survive and persevere no matter what.

Today’s topic is:

Despite his virtues, Arthur Leander is essentially a bad man. Do you agree?

If you’re familiar with what we do at LSG, you might be familiar with our Five Types strategy. Basically, it’s a method for students to group categorise prompts into types, and by doing so, you get an immediate idea of how to approach an essay question and some things that you must include, along with things you mustn’t.

And out of the 5 types, this prompt is character-based, through and through. It poses us the difficult task of deciphering the ethics and morality of an individual in the text. Immediately, if you write on this prompt, you must know Arthur pretty damn well! It pays to be strategic — if you don’t know Arthur all that in a SAC or exam, pick another question if possible.

The key words in this one are fairly self-explanatory. You’ve got “ virtues ” on the one hand, which basically refers to being good or having good morals , and “ bad man ” on the other. What’s important is how we define them in the context of the essay, so we need to consider the ways in which Arthur is both virtuous and bad and make sure these are clear in our intro.

Also, the prompt is suggesting that Arthur Leander is ‘bad’ at his core, because of the word “ essentially .” This is the part where there’s a little bit of room to challenge, since there is a lot of evidence that might suggest he isn’t all bad.

Before we dive into the plan, you might want to pause here for a minute and write down what you find to be Arthur’s top two virtues and worst two flaws. Go on, do it!

For me, I think that he’s ambitious and determined in his career, and he can be kind to others in his personal life. However, he also has a philandering or womanising side , and can be neglectful of his family and friends. I would also consider whether or not his legacy was favourable , unflattering , or mixed . Did he leave behind more positivity in the world, or less, when he died?

Let’s arrange this into paragraphs.

Paragraph one

Arthur is flawed in the way he treats others, manifested in his inconsiderate actions, misogynistic tendencies and raising of Tyler.

I think it’d be hard to argue that Arthur is a flawless character whom it would be unfair to call “bad.” We know that Arthur was unfaithful, and many saw his life as being “summed up in a series of failed marriages. ” We know that he treats women as interchangeable objects rather than as people, not only his wives but also his childhood friend Victoria. We also know that he neglects his children, missing Tyler’s birthday for work, as well as his friends, with his increasingly disingenuous and strained relationship with Clark.

In terms of mentally rearranging elements of the story, it might be worth noting here how his bad traits manifested in his son, Tyler. Making a connection between these two timelines may help us realise that in many ways, Tyler is just a more perverse version of his father—he too treats women like possessions, and doesn’t really have a family so much as a community of followers.

Paragraph two

Arguably, Arthur’s selfish traits stem from his Hollywood fame, career and lifestyle.

Fundamentally, he was never this flaky, unreliable person before he was swept away by fame. From a young age, he was determined that he was “going to be an actor and…going to be good,” and the drive with which he pursues this career is undoubtedly virtuous and admirable. Along the way, he offers Miranda a way out of her abusive and one-sided relationship, validating her own “pursuit of happiness.”

So looking at the ‘bookends’ of Arthur’s life, it can be argued that he’s actually essentially a good person. Before Hollywood taints him, and after he realises how much he has been tainted, Arthur does actually demonstrate a lot of virtue.

Paragraph three

However, overall, Arthur leaves behind a positive legacy that reflects that despite his shortcomings, he is fundamentally a good man who has been tainted by immoral habits and attitudes.

Here, the discussion surrounds Arthur’s legacy—is he remembered as a good person? In what ways does Arthur live on? The photographs that Kirsten finds along her journey depict Arthur shielding Miranda from the paparazzi and spending time with his son, and these are lasting memories of his virtues which haven’t been destroyed by the Flu. Consider also the “ whispers ” and “ glances ” that plagued him during his life, and we can’t help but wonder what kind of man he would’ve been in a world with less people and less scrutiny.

And there you have it! Hopefully, you can see what I meant at the start about rearranging bits of the book. For example, these photographs belong in Kirsten’s timeline and are discovered through her point of view, but there isn’t any reason why you can’t connect them to elements of Arthur’s character more broadly. Also, even just by looking at the start and end of Arthur’s life without the middle changes how we interpret him as a character. It’s this kind of flexibility that will serve you well in this text study.

If you'd like to see an A+ essay on the essay topic above, complete with annotations on HOW and WHY the essays achieved A+ so you can emulate this same success, then you'll definitely want to check out our Station Eleven Study Guide: A Killer Text Guide! In it, we also cover themes, characters, views and values, metalanguage and have 4 other sample A+ essays completely annotated so you can smash your next SAC or exam! Check it out here .

For more Station Eleven writing samples, you might like to take a look at this blog post , which compares three different paragraphs and analyses how they improve upon one another.

Extra Resources

Download a PDF version of this blog for printing or offline use

The Ultimate guide to VCE Text Response

How To Write A Killer Text Response Study Guide

How to embed quotes in your essay like a boss

How to turn your Text Response essays from average to A+

5 Tips for a mic drop worthy essay conclusion

Hey everyone! This is Part 2 in a series of videos I will release on VCE Study Guides. The content goes through the sample VCAA Chickens Range Free article which you can find  here . Feel free to analyse it yourself, then check out how I’ve analysed the article!

I’m super excited to share with you my  first  ever online tutorial course for VCE English/EAL students on  How to achieve A+ for Language Analysis !!!

I created this course for a few reasons:

Language Analysis is often the  key weakness  for VCE English/EAL students, after my workshops, students always wish we had spent  even   more  time on Language Analysis, many of you have come to me seeking private tuition however since I am fully booked out, I wanted to still offer you a chance to gain access to my ‘breakthrough’ method of tutoring Language Analysis,I am absolutely confident in my  unique  and  straightforward  way of teaching Language Analysis which has lead to my students securing exceptional A graded SAC and exam scores!

Are you a student who:

struggles to identify language techniques?

finds it difficult to identify which tones are adopted in articles?

has no idea explaining  HOW  the author persuades?

finds it difficult to structure your language analysis essay?

becomes even more unsure when comparing 2 or 3 articles?

feels like your teacher at school never explained language analysis properly?

prefers learning when it’s enjoyable and easy to understand?

wants to stand out from other students across the cohort?

wants to know the secrets of 45+ English high achievers?

wants to know what examiners are looking for?

sees room for improvement whether you’re an average student or a pro?

wants to get a head start and maximise your potential in VCE?

This is what you will accomplish by the end of the course:

Be able to successfully identify language techniques in articles and images

Be able to successfully identify tones adopted in articles and images

Be able to analyse a single article or image

Be able to analyse 2 or more articles and/or images

Be able to apply your new skills coherently and clearly in essay writing

You will be able to accurately describe HOW an author uses language to persuade

You will be able to plan and write a language analysis essay structure (single article/image)

You will be able to plan and write a language analysis essay structure (2 or more articles/images)

You will understand common pitfalls and how to avoid these in language analysis

Be confident when approaching your SACs and exam

Know exactly what examiners are looking for and how to ‘WOW’ them

Know how to distinguish yourself from other students

Have unlimited help in course forum from myself and other VCE students

You will become a better VCE English language analysis student!

To find out more, you can check out the full details of the course   here !

See you in the course!

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How Many Sentences Are in a Paragraph, Really?

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Have you ever found yourself staring at a blank page, wondering if your paragraph is too short, too long, or just right? Well, you're not alone in asking how many sentences are in a paragraph . It can be hard to tell whether you've provided enough information and if, most importantly, it is easy to read and effectively communicates your main point.

There’s no magic number, but there are certain rules that writers can follow to create solid compositions.

Paragraph Structure 101

How many sentences are in a paragraph, can a paragraph be one sentence long, when to write shorter paragraphs, when to write longer paragraphs, nailing the final sentence, when is the right time to start a new paragraph, 5 tips for writing the perfect paragraph.

A paragraph is like a well-balanced meal, complete with a main idea, details to savor and a satisfying conclusion. This distinct section of writing deals with a particular idea or theme and typically consists of several sentences that are related and organized around a central point.

Here are the core components of a paragraph.

• Topic sentence : This is usually the first sentence of the paragraph, boldly introducing the main idea or point. It’s like the person at a party who starts the conversation with an exciting story, grabbing everyone’s attention.
• Supporting sentences : These sentences are the loyal friends who chime in with more details, explanations or examples to back up the main idea. Think of them as the friends who add, "So true, I saw that too!"
• Concluding sentence : This sentence wraps up the idea of the paragraph and may provide a transition to the next paragraph. It’s like the smooth talker at the end who sums up the moral of the story, leaving everyone satisfied and ready for the next tale.

There is no hard-and-fast rule regarding paragraph length. There is a time and a place for short paragraphs and their longer counterparts (we'll get to this later).

Determining the perfect number of sentences in a paragraph is more of an art than a science, but some helpful guidelines exist. Generally, a paragraph contains three to five sentences. This range ensures you have enough space to introduce your main idea, support it with details and wrap it up neatly — all without overwhelming your reader.

Breaking Down an Example

If you're writing about the benefits of exercise, your paragraph might start with a topic sentence like, "Exercise is crucial for maintaining good health."

Follow with a few supporting sentences like, "It improves cardiovascular health and strengthens muscles. In addition to the physical benefits, exercise also boosts mental well-being."

Then, finish with a strong closing sentence, "Incorporating regular exercise into your routine can lead to a happier, healthier life."

So, how many words are in an average paragraph? The typical range is 100 to 200 words. Think of this as a comfortable size for your reader to absorb. In academic writing, a paragraph might be on the longer side to thoroughly explore a concept, while in casual writing, shorter paragraphs keep things snappy and engaging.

Remember, these are guidelines, not rigid rules. The key is to balance clarity, completeness and reader engagement, making your paragraphs just the right length to keep readers or target audience hooked and informed.

It's common to assume that a good paragraph should be at least three or four sentences long, but that is not always the case. A paragraph can be one sentence, especially in certain contexts — like creative writing or journalism — or when emphasizing a particular point.

For example, "And then, silence," is a short, one-sentence paragraph often used for dramatic effect or to highlight a moment in the narrative. A short paragraph like this can be particularly effective when the previous paragraph is on the lengthy side.

In more formal or academic writing, paragraphs typically contain multiple sentences to develop an idea fully, but there are still some rare instances of single-sentence paragraphs. For example, "The experiment failed," is a one-sentence paragraph that can be used to highlight a significant result or conclusion.

Shorter paragraphs can be very effective in various contexts. For instance, they are useful for emphasizing a point, as a short paragraph can draw attention to a key idea or conclusion, making it stand out from the surrounding text. Think of it as the literary equivalent of a mic drop.

A brief paragraph in creative writing or storytelling can heighten suspense or emphasize a sudden change or revelation, such as "And then, the lights went out." It’s like the plot twist nobody saw coming.

Improving readability is another important reason to use shorter paragraphs. In web writing or other forms of media, shorter paragraphs can help keep the reader engaged and make the text easier to digest. Imagine serving your readers bite-sized snacks instead of a five-course meal.

Shorter paragraphs are also helpful for introducing a new idea. Starting a new section or shifting to a new idea with a short paragraph can provide a clear break and signal a transition to the reader. It's like saying, "Hold on, new topic ahead!"

Lastly, shorter paragraphs in blogs or informal writing can create a more conversational and approachable tone, making the content more engaging for the reader. Think of it as chatting with a friend rather than lecturing a class.

Sometimes, it's good to give your readers a break, so don't be afraid to keep it short and sweet!

Longer paragraphs are like a hearty stew: Sometimes, you need that extra depth and richness. They’re great for diving into complex topics where you must provide detailed explanations, multiple examples and robust support for your points. This is especially useful in academic writing, research papers and detailed reports where a brief overview just won't cut it.

In narrative writing, longer paragraphs allow you to set the scene, develop characters and advance the plot without stopping every few sentences.

When presenting a nuanced argument, longer paragraphs help articulate intricacies and counterpoints effectively, keeping the text from becoming a patchwork quilt of ideas. Just make sure they stay focused and clear so your readers don’t get lost in the wordy wilderness.

The secret to a solid final sentence lies in its ability to encapsulate the main idea of the paragraph and leave a lasting impression. It should provide a sense of closure, tying together the key points discussed. Using impactful language or a thought-provoking statement can make the final sentence memorable.

For example, a strong final sentence in a paragraph about climate change could be, "Our actions today will determine the planet's future — so maybe skip that extra-long shower."

In a discussion about healthy eating, you might conclude with, "Remember, an apple a day keeps the doctor away, but only if you actually eat it."

Knowing when to break into a new paragraph is key for clarity. Start a new paragraph when introducing a new idea or topic, when you need to break up a long block of text to improve readability or when you want to emphasize a point.

Transitioning between different speakers in dialogue also requires a new paragraph. Whenever your writing takes a new direction, think of it as a cue for a fresh paragraph.

These tips will help you craft clear, cohesive and compelling paragraphs.

• Stick to one core idea. Each paragraph should focus on a single core idea, in the same way that a good joke has one punchline. For example, if you're discussing the benefits of exercise, don't suddenly veer off into your favorite cookie recipes.
• Create connections between sentences. Make sure your sentences flow logically from one to the next. Think of it like a conga line: Each sentence should seamlessly follow the previous one, keeping the party going smoothly.
• Use transition words. Transition words and phrases — such as "however," "therefore" and "for example" — guide your reader through your argument and signaling shifts between ideas.
• Include supporting details. Bolster your main idea with supporting details, examples and evidence. Imagine you're trying to convince someone that pizza is the best food; you'll need to include tasty details like, "With its ooey-gooey mozzarella cheese, herbaceous marinara sauce and crisp pepperoni slices, piping-hot pizza is the perfect meal."
• Conclude with a strong closing sentence. Wrap up your paragraph with a concluding sentence that reinforces the main idea and provides a sense of closure. It's like the final chord in a song, leaving your reader with a satisfying sense of completeness.

Happy writing!

We created this article in conjunction with AI technology, then made3 sure it was fact-checked and edited by a HowStuffWorks editor.

Please copy/paste the following text to properly cite this HowStuffWorks.com article:

A Word, Please: Subjects and verbs should agree, but it’s not always easy

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“‘Guys are allowed to bring their girlfriend/girlfriends to the event.’ Are both OK?”

That’s what a user on an English language message board wanted to know a while back. And if you’ve never thought about this issue before, prepare for some brain pain.

As you know, subjects and verbs should agree. You walk. He walks. The verb changes form to match the number of the subject. That’s agreement. But objects don’t agree with subjects. You may walk the dogs if there’s more than one. Or you may walk the dog if there’s just one. The subject and verb have no bearing on how many objects you have.

In some sentences, however, that doesn’t work out so well.

For example, try the plural object in our sentence above and you get: “Guys are allowed to bring their girlfriends.” That has a nice mathematical balance to it. There are a number of guys, along with a number of girls. So it’s true, yet the meaning isn’t clear. With “girlfriends” in the plural, you could be saying that every guy has more than one girlfriend — that each guy should bring all his girlfriends. Surely that’s not what the writer meant.

The singular object must fit the bill then, right? “Guys are allowed to bring their girlfriend.” But that seems to suggest that all the guys — no matter how many — share just one girlfriend. Doubtful that’s what the writer meant, either.

Regular readers of this column know that, often, when grammar gives you an either-or, which-is-right scenario, the answer is: both. It’s rare to come across a which-is-right question in grammar where the answer is: neither. But, technically, that’s the case here: Neither the plural object nor the singular object captures your exact meaning.

A Word, Please: You’re free to peruse this commentary in every sense of the word

Some grammarians would limit “peruse,” which can be a synonym for “read” and “browse,” to a more focused definition more akin to “study.”

May 21, 2024

This comes up a lot with sentences that have “everyone” or “everybody” as a subject: “Everyone gets their turn.” But these two pronouns add another layer of confusion because, as Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary of English Usage puts it: “‘Everyone’ and ‘everybody’ are grammatically singular but notionally plural.” That means that even though these words are understood to represent multiple people, they take singular verbs: Everyone is here, not everyone are here. Everyone gets, not everyone get. Their objects can get weird, too. After using the singular verb “gets,” we shift back into the plural with “their,” then right back into the singular with “turn.”

There’s no consistency, no logic. Our only guide is what sounds right. And notice how wrong it would sound to use a plural object in this sentence: “Everyone gets their turns.” Grammatically, that’s the same as saying guys bring their “girlfriends,” yet they get “their turns” somehow sounds much worse.

The modifier “their” doesn’t help, either. If we used “his or her,” it could help in some situations: “Everyone who agrees should raise his or her hand” makes the singular “hand” more logical than “Everyone who agrees should raise their hand.” But that only works sometimes.

Certain language critics have tried to make rules to fix these object problems, like Theodore Bernstein, who wrote that “their” referring to “everyone” “is not sanctioned in good writing.” But, like a lot of language rule-makers, Bernstein used the sneaky passive voice to mask the fact that he was the guy who doled out the sanctions ’round here, thank you very much. In other words, he was making up a rule based on nothing but his own say-so.

So what should you do when you don’t know how many girlfriends plural guys can bring? Well, because neither option is right, neither is wrong, either. Just go with whatever you prefer and take comfort in these words from Barbara Wallraff’s “Word Court”: “When one is at pains to make clear that the individuals in the subject are to be paired one apiece with the persons, places or things in question, the number of the noun can’t be relied on to make the point.”

June Casagrande is the author of “The Joy of Syntax: A Simple Guide to All the Grammar You Know You Should Know.” She can be reached at [email protected] .

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The Donald Trump I Saw on The Apprentice

For 20 years, i couldn’t say what i watched the former president do on the set of the show that changed everything. now i can..

On Jan. 8, 2004, just more than 20 years ago, the first episode of The Apprentice aired. It was called “Meet the Billionaire,” and 18 million people watched. The episodes that followed climbed to roughly 20 million each week. A staggering 28 million viewers tuned in to watch the first season finale. The series won an Emmy nomination for Outstanding Reality-Competition Program, and the Television Critics Association called it one of the best TV shows of the year, alongside The Sopranos and Arrested Development . The series—alongside its bawdy sibling, The Celebrity Apprentice —appeared on NBC in coveted prime-time slots for more than a decade.

The Apprentice was an instant success in another way too. It elevated Donald J. Trump from sleazy New York tabloid hustler to respectable household name. In the show, he appeared to demonstrate impeccable business instincts and unparalleled wealth, even though his businesses had barely survived multiple bankruptcies and faced yet another when he was cast. By carefully misleading viewers about Trump—his wealth, his stature, his character, and his intent—the competition reality show set about an American fraud that would balloon beyond its creators’ wildest imaginations.

I should know. I was one of four producers involved in the first two seasons. During that time, I signed an expansive nondisclosure agreement that promised a fine of $5 million and even jail time if I were to ever divulge what actually happened. It expired this year.

No one involved in The Apprentice —from the production company or the network, to the cast and crew—was involved in a con with malicious intent. It was a TV show , and it was made for entertainment . I still believe that. But we played fast and loose with the facts, particularly regarding Trump, and if you were one of the 28 million who tuned in, chances are you were conned.

As Trump answers for another of his alleged deception schemes in New York and gears up to try to persuade Americans to elect him again, in part thanks to the myth we created, I can finally tell you what making Trump into what he is today looked like from my side. Most days were revealing. Some still haunt me, two decades later.

Nearly everything I ever learned about deception I learned from my friend Apollo Robbins. He’s been called a professional pickpocket, but he’s actually a “perceptions expert.” Apollo has spent his life studying the psychology of how we distort other people’s perceptions of reality and has done so by picking pockets onstage for the entertainment of others. He is a master of deception, a skill that made him, back in the day, the so-called best-kept secret in Las Vegas. After “fanning” his marks with casual, unobtrusive touch designed to make them feel safe or at ease, Apollo determines where the items reside—the wallet inside a breast pocket, the Rolex fastened to a wrist—and he removes these items without detection. He’ll even tell you what he intends to steal before he does it. He does this not to hurt people or bewilder them with a puzzle but to challenge their maps of reality. The results are marvelous. A lot of magic is designed to appeal to people visually, but what he’s trying to affect is your mind, your moods, your perceptions.

As a producer working in unscripted, or “reality,” television, I have the same goal. Like Apollo, I want to entertain, make people joyful, maybe even challenge their ways of thinking. But because I often lack the cinematic power of a movie, with its visual pyrotechnics or rehearsed dialogue, I rely on shaping the perceptions of viewers, manipulating their maps of reality toward something I want them to think or feel.

The presumption is that reality TV is scripted. What actually happens is the illusion of reality by staging situations against an authentic backdrop. The more authentic it is to, say, have a 40-foot wave bearing down on a crab boat in the Bering Sea for Deadliest Catch , the more we can trick you into thinking a malevolent Russian trawler is out there messing with the crabber’s bait. There is a trick to it, and when it works, you feel as if you’re watching a scripted show. Although very few programs are out-and-out fake, there is deception at play in every single reality program. The producers and editors are ostensibly con artists, distracting you with grand notions while we steal from you your precious time.

But the real con that drove The Apprentice is far older than television. The “pig in the poke” comes from an idiom dating to 1555: “I’ll never buy a pig in a poke / There’s many a foul pig in a fair cloak.” It refers to the time-honored scam of selling a suckling pig at market but handing over a bag (the poke) to the purchaser, who never looks inside it. Eventually, he discovers he’s purchased something quite different.

Our show became a 21 st -century version. It’s a long con played out over a decade of watching Trump dominate prime time by shouting orders, appearing to lead, and confidently firing some of the most capable people on television, all before awarding one eligible person a job. Audiences responded to Trump’s arrogance, his perceived abilities and prescience, but mostly his confidence . The centerpiece to any confidence game is precisely that— confidence .

As I walk into my interview for The Apprentice , I inadvertently learn how important it is for every one of us involved to demonstrate confidence above all else.

I sit down with Jay Bienstock, the showrunner, who has one last producer position to fill and needs somebody capable and hardworking. His office is sparse, and the desk is strategically placed directly across from the couch, with a noticeable angle downward from his desk to whomever is seated across from him. (I’m recalling all of the quoted conversations here to the best of my ability; they are not verbatim.)

He is smiling and even laughing throughout the interview, but from the steep angle at which he gazes down on me, there is no mistaking who is in charge. He seems to like what he hears and offers to follow up with my agent. “But I have to check your references before I can hire you,” he says. “You’d be crazy not to,” I reply. He laughs, claps his hands together, and grins. “ THAT’S what I’m talking about,” he says. “That’s the confidence this show needs!”

I sit there, several inches below eyeline, and ponder what just happened. What, I wonder, is so “confident” about suggesting he’d be crazy to not check my references? Then it dawns on me. He thinks I meant “You’d be crazy not to hire me.” The signal to noise begins.

Listen to Bill Pruitt discuss this story on What Next , Slate’s daily news podcast:

Before I leave, I have to ask: Why Trump? Bienstock discovers that we both lived in New York for a time. Knowing what we know about Trump, selling the idea that intelligent people would compete to land a job working for him will be a challenge.

“The idea is to have a new and different billionaire every season—just like there’s a new and different island on Survivor . We reached out to Spielberg, Katzenberg, Geffen, among others,” he says. “Trump is the only one who agreed to sign on.” (Bienstock didn’t respond to a request for comment.)

“We’ll make it work,” Bienstock says confidently. I rise, shake his hand, and leave, and head over to Dutton’s bookstore to pick up a used copy of Trump’s The Art of the Deal . It is filled with takeaways about branding and strategizing but conveniently omits Trump bluffing his way through meetings with contractors, stiffing them when it is convenient to do so, and betraying his most trusted colleagues to get what he wants. (The book’s ghostwriter, Tony Schwartz, has since tried to get the bestseller recategorized in the Library of Congress as a work of fiction.)

Another show of confidence is the budget the series commands. It’s not as expensive as a scripted series, but for a reality show, the price is high. Never have I worked on a series with this level of funding, but the cost is justified. This needs to feel real.

New York City is the perfect—though expensive—backdrop. Trump’s actual offices are, however, less than telegenic. They are cramped, and a lot of the wood furniture is chipped or peeling. None of it is suitable to appear on camera. We need what grifters call the Big Store: a fake but authentic-looking establishment in which the con goes down. Trump Tower, at the time, is mostly condos and some offices situated in the high-rise. The mezzanine comprises vacant and overpriced retail space, all of it unfinished. Trump offers the space to the production—at a premium, naturally—and it is inside this location that we create our own “reception area” with doors leading to a fake, dimly lit, and appropriately ominous-feeling “boardroom.”

Next door, there’s the “suite” where the contestants will live, which is made to look like a trendy loft-style apartment they all share. The lodgings are made up of partitions surrounding tiny, hard bunks upon which the candidates sleep; the illusion comes from elegantly appointed common areas, where most of the interplay will go down.

During a tour of the set, I have my first encounter with Trump. I leave the suite and enter the gear room, the only vacant retail space that will remain unfinished. It is filled with equipment and crew members milling about. In walks a trio of men. In the middle is Trump, in a navy blue suit and scarlet tie. He’s surprisingly tall, and not just because of the hair. He is flanked by two even taller men. Bienstock makes introductions, and I watch as Trump shakes hands with everyone. I’d been told he would never do this, something about fearing unwanted germs. When it is my turn, I decide on the convivial two-hander and place my right hand into his and my left onto his wrist as we shake. His eye contact is limited but thorough. He is sizing me up. He looks like a wolf about to rip my throat out before turning away, offering me my first glimpse at the superstructure—his hairstyle—buttressed atop his head with what must be gallons of Aqua Net.

I watch as Trump saunters around the room, snatches up a fistful of M&Ms from the craft service table set aside for the crew, and shoves them into his mouth. Then he is gone, ushered away toward some important meeting he must attend, as if to say, to one and all present, This is unimportant .

Eventually, it’s time to roll cameras. When Trump is called to perform, we are filming the first scene of the first episode on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange, and he is about to deliver the first task. Filming inside this beacon of capitalism and wealth gives the series the legitimacy it needs. A con artist would call staging the scam inside a legitimate institution “playing a man against the wall.”

From the balcony overlooking the famed trading room floor, Trump will set up the entire premise of the show on camera and engage in a little banter with the other participants. This includes introducing his advisers, George Ross, an older, grouchy attorney devoted to Trump’s legal affairs, and Carolyn Kepcher, a perpetual skeptic who runs his hospitality units and one of his golf clubs. (They might be called “the shills,” others in on the con who will act as Trump’s eyes and ears.)

The contestants are there, lined up and zeroed in on by camera operators getting reaction shots to whatever it is Trump says. Although they mostly just stand and wait, they patiently go along with the proceedings. They are not in on the con. They act as “the little blind mice,” who, in fraudster terms, convey a sense of authenticity by reacting to the goings-on, like lab rats caught in a maze.

Nothing is scripted—except for what Trump needs to say. Cue cards are present, but mostly it is Bienstock running up, coaching Trump, tossing out suggestions from the script he has written for the man. The feeling is that while doing a fair job of repeating the necessary words verbatim, Trump also appears to be inadvertently shouting at the contestants. His hands shuttle back and forth as if holding an invisible accordion, a gesture now famous in memes .

Each episode is filmed over three days. For the first episode, the two teams of contestants, divided by gender, take to the streets to carry out the initial task of trying to sell lemonade for the most money. The women pulverize the men.

Having won, the women are invited upstairs for a direct look at Trump’s very own apartment in Trump Tower, a reward designed specifically to introduce viewers to the gaudy but elevated world of Donald Trump at home. The men, who lost, go back to the loft to await their fate at the hands of Trump. He will be sending one of them home.

Inside the now-empty boardroom set, a meeting with the producers is called for the first briefing of Trump before the anticipated firing. With Trump are his cronies, Ross and Kepcher. Trump is “too busy,” so they have each observed both teams in the field and make an assessment of who prevailed and who fell behind.

Now, this is important. The Apprentice is a game show regulated by the Federal Communications Commission. In the 1950s, scandals arose when producers of quiz shows fed answers to likable, ratings-generating contestants while withholding those answers from unlikable but truly knowledgeable players. Any of us involved in The Apprentice swinging the outcome of prize money by telling Trump whom to fire is forbidden.

Considering this, Bienstock wisely chooses to record these off-camera briefings in case the FCC ever rolls up on us. Rather than blurt out who they think should get canned, the two producers of that week’s episode—each following one team—are coached to equitably share with Trump the virtues and deficiencies of each member of the losing team. This renders a balanced depiction of how and why they lost. There are obvious choices of whom to fire, but we want it to be something of a horse race, to sustain the drama and keep people watching.

Satisfied he has what he needs, Trump dismisses the prefiring discussion with the wave of a hand, claiming he has places to be, let’s get on with it, etc. We proceed to set up for what will be our first boardroom.

The producers retreat to the adjacent control room to watch the event unfold. Per the show’s format, the losing team is summoned in anticipation of one of its members being sent home. Leaving their luggage in the reception area, the men walk into the boardroom, where Trump is flanked by Ross and Kepcher, waiting for them solemnly. Trump just frowns from a gigantic red leather chair, his eyeline noticeably well above those sitting across from him.

The men proceed to verbally go after one another like gladiators jousting before the emperor. Trump takes the conversation into potentially dangerous terrain, asking one contestant, who is Jewish, whether he believes in “the genetic pool.” The contestant’s retort is swift and resolute: He tells Trump that he does, in fact, have the genes, “just like you got from your father, Fred Trump, and your mother, Mary Trump.” It pours out of him. It is dramatic. It is good reality TV.

The project manager must then choose two of the men to come back to the boardroom with him while everyone else is dismissed. An off-camera prefiring consultation with Trump takes place (and is recorded), right before the three men are brought back for the eventual firing. We film Trump, Ross, and Kepcher deliberating and giving the pluses and minuses of each, remarking on how risky it was for one of the contestants to stand up for himself the way that he did. Trump turns back and forth to each, listening. His cronies stick to their stories and give added deferential treatment toward Trump, with Ross strategically reminding him, “You’ve been taking risks your entire life.”

Trump summons the three men back into the boardroom for final judging. Trump grills one and says, “I will let you stay.” ( Wow! we think. A benevolent leader. ) When he turns his attention to the other man—the one he asked about genetics—it looks clear. He is doomed. So much so that the man stands when Trump tells him, “It seems unanimous.” Trump then offhandedly tells him to sit down, calling him “a wild card,” echoing Ross’ earlier observation of the boss, Trump.

After this comes an unwieldy moment when, at the behest of Bienstock, Trump fumbles through a given line. “We have an elevator,” he says to the remaining contestant, named David, “that goes up to the suite and an elevator that goes down”—he pauses to recall the exact wording—“to the street. And, David, I’m going to ask you to take the down elevator.”

The men react and awkwardly rise. It is an unsatisfactory conclusion, given all the preceding drama.

From the control room, we all watch as the three men depart the boardroom. A quick huddle takes place between the producers and the executive from NBC. We bolt from the control room out into the boardroom and confer with Trump, telling him we will need him to say something more direct to conclude the moment when David is let go.

“Well, I’d probably just fire him,” Trump says. “Why not just say that?” Bienstock asks. “Fine,” Trump says.

We return to the control room. The three men from the losing team are brought back into the boardroom, and Trump repeats his line about the elevator, then turns to David, who already knows his fate, and adds, “David, you’re fired.”

The line insertion happened in a perilously scripted way, but it is deemed satisfactory. “You’re fired” becomes the expression we will stick with. It works. Trump comes off as decisive and to the point.

Later, Trump will try to trademark “You’re fired.” He is not successful.

Trump’s appearances make up so little of our shooting schedule that whenever he shows up to film, it isn’t just the wild-card on-camera moments we both hope for and are terrified of that put everyone on edge. It is the way he, the star (and half owner) of the show, targets people on the crew with the gaze of a hungry lion.

While leering at a female camera assistant or assessing the physical attributes of a female contestant for whoever is listening, he orders a female camera operator off an elevator on which she is about to film him. “She’s too heavy,” I hear him say.

Another female camera operator, who happens to have blond hair and blue eyes, draws from Trump comparisons to his own Ivanka Trump. “There’s a beautiful woman behind that camera,” he says toward a line of 10 different operators set up in the foyer of Trump Tower one day. “That’s all I want to look at.”

Trump corners a female producer and asks her whom he should fire. She demurs, saying something about how one of the contestants blamed another for their team losing. Trump then raises his hands, cupping them to his chest: “You mean the one with the …?” He doesn’t know the contestant’s name. Trump eventually fires her.

(In response to detailed questions about this and other incidents reported in this article, Steven Cheung, a spokesman for the Trump 2024 campaign, wrote, “This is a completely fabricated and bullshit story that was already peddled in 2016.” He said that it is surfacing now because Democrats are “desperate.”)

Trump goes about knocking off every one of the contestants in the boardroom until only two remain. The finalists are Kwame Jackson, a Black broker from Goldman Sachs, and Bill Rancic, a white entrepreneur from Chicago who runs his own cigar business. Trump assigns them each a task devoted to one of his crown-jewel properties. Jackson will oversee a Jessica Simpson benefit concert at Trump Taj Mahal Casino in Atlantic City, while Rancic will oversee a celebrity golf tournament at Trump National Golf Club in Briarcliff Manor, New York.

Viewers need to believe that whatever Trump touches turns to gold. These properties that bear his name are supposed to glitter and gleam. All thanks to him.

Reality is another matter altogether. The lights in the casino’s sign are out. Hong Kong investors actually own the place—Trump merely lends his name. The carpet stinks, and the surroundings for Simpson’s concert are ramshackle at best. We shoot around all that.

Both Rancic and Jackson do a round-robin recruitment of former contestants, and Jackson makes the fateful decision to team up with the notorious Omarosa, among others, to help him carry out his final challenge.

With her tenure on the series nearly over, Omarosa launches several simultaneous attacks on her fellow teammates in support of her “brother” Kwame. For the fame-seeking beauty queen, it is a do-or-die play for some much-coveted screen time. As on previous tasks, Ross and Kepcher will observe both events.

Over at Trump National Golf Club, where I am stationed, it is sunny and bright, set against luscious fall colors. I am driven up to the golf club from Manhattan to scout. With me are the other producers, all of whom are men. We meet Trump at one of the homes he keeps for himself on the grounds of the club.

“Melania doesn’t even know about this place,” he says out loud to us, snickering, implying that the home’s function is as his personal lair for his sexual exploits, all of which are unknown to his then-fiancée Melania Knauss.

We are taken around the rest of the club’s property and told what to feature on camera and what to stay away from. The clubhouse is a particularly necessary inclusion, and it is inside these luxurious confines where I have the privilege of meeting the architect. Finding myself alone with him, I make a point of commending him for what I feel is a remarkable building. The place is genuinely spectacular. He thanks me.

“It’s bittersweet,” he tells me. “I’m very proud of this place, but …” He hesitates. “I wasn’t paid what was promised,” he says. I just listen. “Trump pays half upfront,” he says, “but he’ll stiff you for the rest once the project is completed.”

“He stiffed you?”

“If I tried to sue, the legal bills would be more than what I was owed. He knew that. He basically said Take what I’m offering ,” and I see how heavy this is for the man, all these years later. “So, we sent the invoice. He didn’t even pay that,” he says. None of this will be in the show. Not Trump’s suggested infidelities, nor his aversion toward paying those who work for him.

When the tasks are over, we are back in the boardroom, having our conference with Trump about how the two finalists compare—a conversation that I know to be recorded. We huddle around him and set up the last moments of the candidates, Jackson and Rancic.

Trump will make his decision live on camera months later, so what we are about to film is the setup to that reveal. The race between Jackson and Rancic should seem close, and that’s how we’ll edit the footage. Since we don’t know who’ll be chosen, it must appear close, even if it’s not.

We lay out the virtues and deficiencies of each finalist to Trump in a fair and balanced way, but sensing the moment at hand, Kepcher sort of comes out of herself. She expresses how she observed Jackson at the casino overcoming more obstacles than Rancic, particularly with the way he managed the troublesome Omarosa. Jackson, Kepcher maintains, handled the calamity with grace.

“I think Kwame would be a great addition to the organization,” Kepcher says to Trump, who winces while his head bobs around in reaction to what he is hearing and clearly resisting.

“Why didn’t he just fire her?” Trump asks, referring to Omarosa. It’s a reasonable question. Given that this the first time we’ve ever been in this situation, none of this is something we expected.

“That’s not his job,” Bienstock says to Trump. “That’s yours.” Trump’s head continues to bob.

“I don’t think he knew he had the ability to do that,” Kepcher says. Trump winces again.

“Yeah,” he says to no one in particular, “but, I mean, would America buy a n— winning?”

Kepcher’s pale skin goes bright red. I turn my gaze toward Trump. He continues to wince. He is serious, and he is adamant about not hiring Jackson.

Bienstock does a half cough, half laugh, and swiftly changes the topic or throws to Ross for his assessment. What happens next I don’t entirely recall. I am still processing what I have just heard. We all are. Only Bienstock knows well enough to keep the train moving. None of us thinks to walk out the door and never return. I still wish I had. (Bienstock and Kepcher didn’t respond to requests for comment.)

Afterward, we film the final meeting in the boardroom, where Jackson and Rancic are scrutinized by Trump, who, we already know, favors Rancic. Then we wrap production, pack up, and head home. There is no discussion about what Trump said in the boardroom, about how the damning evidence was caught on tape. Nothing happens.

We go home and face the next phase of our assignment, the editing. In stitching the footage together, the swindle we are now involved in ascends to new levels.

Editing in a reality TV show is what script writing is to a narrative series. A lot of effort goes into the storytelling because, basically, in every single unscripted series—whether it’s a daytime talk show, an adventure documentary, or a shiny floor dance-off—there are three versions: There’s what happens, there’s what gets filmed, and there’s what gets cut down into 43 minutes squeezed between commercial breaks. Especially for a competition series, it’s important that the third version represent the first as much as possible. A defeated contestant could show up in the press and cry foul if they’re misrepresented. Best to let people fail of their own accord. That said, we look after our prized possessions in how we edit the series, and some people fare better than others.

We attend to our thesis that only the best and brightest deserve a job working for Donald Trump. Luckily, the winner, Bill Rancic, and his rival, Kwame Jackson, come off as capable and confident throughout the season. If for some reason they had not, we would have conveniently left their shortcomings on the cutting room floor. In actuality, both men did deserve to win.

Without a doubt, the hardest decisions we faced in postproduction were how to edit together sequences involving Trump. We needed him to sound sharp, dignified, and clear on what he was looking for and not as if he was yelling at people. You see him today: When he reads from a teleprompter, he comes off as loud and stoic. Go to one of his rallies and he’s the off-the-cuff rambler rousing his followers into a frenzy. While filming, he struggled to convey even the most basic items. But as he became more comfortable with filming, Trump made raucous comments he found funny or amusing—some of them misogynistic as well as racist. We cut those comments. Go to one of his rallies today and you can hear many of them.

If you listen carefully, especially to that first episode, you will notice clearly altered dialogue from Trump in both the task delivery and the boardroom. Trump was overwhelmed with remembering the contestants’ names, the way they would ride the elevator back upstairs or down to the street, the mechanics of what he needed to convey. Bienstock instigated additional dialogue recording that came late in the edit phase. We set Trump up in the soundproof boardroom set and fed him lines he would read into a microphone with Bienstock on the phone, directing from L.A. And suddenly Trump knows the names of every one of the contestants and says them while the camera cuts to each of their faces. Wow , you think, how does he remember everyone’s name? While on location, he could barely put a sentence together regarding how a task would work. Listen now, and he speaks directly to what needs to happen while the camera conveniently cuts away to the contestants, who are listening and nodding. He sounds articulate and concise through some editing sleight of hand.

Then comes the note from NBC about the fact that after Trump delivers the task assignment to the contestants, he disappears from the episode after the first act and doesn’t show up again until the next-to-last. That’s too long for the (high-priced) star of the show to be absent.

There is a convenient solution. At the top of the second act, right after the task has been assigned but right before the teams embark on their assignment, we insert a sequence with Trump, seated inside his gilded apartment, dispensing a carefully crafted bit of wisdom. He speaks to whatever the theme of each episode is—why someone gets fired or what would lead to a win. The net effect is not only that Trump appears once more in each episode but that he also now seems prophetic in how he just knows the way things will go right or wrong with each individual task. He comes off as all-seeing and all-knowing. We are led to believe that Donald Trump is a natural-born leader.

Through the editorial nudge we provide him, Trump prevails. So much so that NBC asks for more time in the boardroom to appear at the end of all the remaining episodes. (NBC declined to comment for this article.)

When it comes to the long con, the cherry on top is the prologue to the premiere. It’s a five-minute-long soliloquy delivered by Trump at the beginning of the first episode, the one titled “Meet the Billionaire.” Over a rousing score, it features Trump pulling out all the stops, calling New York “ my city” and confessing to crawling out from under “billions of dollars in debt.” There’s Trump in the back of limousines. Trump arriving before throngs of cheering crowds outside Trump Tower. Trump in his very own helicopter as it banks over midtown—the same helicopter with the Trump logo that, just like the airplane, is actually for sale to the highest bidder. The truth is, almost nothing was how we made it seem.

So, we scammed. We swindled. Nobody heard the racist and misogynistic comments or saw the alleged cheating, the bluffing, or his hair taking off in the wind. Those tapes, I’ve come to believe, will never be found.

No one lost their retirement fund or fell on hard times from watching The Apprentice . But Trump rose in stature to the point where he could finally eye a run for the White House, something he had intended to do all the way back in 1998. Along the way, he could now feed his appetite for defrauding the public with various shady practices.

In 2005 thousands of students enrolled in what was called Trump University, hoping to gain insight from the Donald and his “handpicked” professors. Each paid as much as $35,000 to listen to some huckster trade on Trump’s name. In a sworn affidavit, salesman Ronald Schnackenberg testified that Trump University was “fraudulent.” The scam swiftly went from online videoconferencing courses to live events held by high-pressure sales professionals whose only job was to persuade attendees to sign up for the course. The sales were for the course “tuition” and had nothing whatsoever to do with real estate investments. A class action suit was filed against Trump.

That same year, Trump was caught bragging to Access Hollywood co-host Billy Bush that he likes to grab married women “by the pussy,” adding, “When you’re a star, they let you do it.” He later tried to recruit porn actor Stormy Daniels for The Apprentice despite her profession and, according to Daniels, had sex with her right after his last son was born. (His alleged attempt to pay off Daniels is, of course, the subject of his recent trial.)

In October 2016—a month before the election—the Access Hollywood tapes were released and written off as “locker room banter.” Trump paid Daniels to keep silent about their alleged affair. He paid $25 million to settle the Trump University lawsuit and make it go away.

He went on to become the first elected president to possess neither public service nor military experience. And although he lost the popular vote, Trump beat out Hillary Clinton in the Electoral College, winning in the Rust Belt by just 80,000 votes.

Trump has been called the “reality TV president,” and not just because of The Apprentice . The Situation Room, where top advisers gathered, became a place for photo-ops, a bigger, better boardroom. Trump swaggered and cajoled, just as he had on the show. Whom would he listen to? Whom would he fire? Stay tuned. Trump even has his own spinoff, called the House of Representatives, where women hurl racist taunts and body-shame one another with impunity. The State of the Union is basically a cage fight. The demands of public office now include blowhard buffoonery.

I reached out to Apollo, the Vegas perceptions expert, to discuss all of this. He reminded me how if a person wants to manipulate the signal, they simply turn up the noise. “In a world that is so uncertain,” he said, “a confidence man comes along and fills in the blanks. The more confident they are, the more we’re inclined to go along with what they suggest.”

A reality TV show gave rise to an avaricious hustler, and a deal was made: Subvert the facts, look past the deficiencies, deceive where necessary, and prevail in the name of television ratings and good, clean fun.

Trump is making another run at the White House and is leading in certain polls. People I know enthusiastically support him and expect he’ll return to office. It’s not just hats, sneakers, a fragrance, or Bibles. Donald Trump is selling his vision of the world, and people are buying it.

Knowing all they know, how could these people still think he’s capable of being president of the United States?

Perhaps they watched our show and were conned by the pig in the poke.