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100 Funny Friendship Quotes You and Your Besties Will Love
Updated on: September 25, 2023 by Louise Myers Leave a Comment
Love fun with friends?
Then you’ll love these funny friendship quotes!
Nothing’s better than sharing a laugh with your BFFs – whether it’s via social media, text message, or birthday card.
So peruse this extensive collection of short, sweet, and clever quotes about friendship, best friends, and true friends.
Then share with your friends for even more enjoyment.
Let the laughter begin…
Funny Friendship Quotes
Let’s jump right in to the craziness and wonder of friendships.
If you are lucky enough to find a weirdo, never them go. ~ Unknown
Friends are people who know you really well and like you anyway. ~ Greg Tamblyn
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. ~ George Carlin
It’s important to our friends to believe that we are unreservedly frank with them, and important to the friendship that we are not. ~ Mignon McLaughlin
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they’re OK, then it’s you. ~ Rita Mae Brown
My friends and I are crazy. That’s the only thing that keeps us sane. ~ Matt Schucker
There is nothing better than a friend, unless it’s a friend with chocolate. ~ Linda Grayson
Friend is someone to share the last cookie with. ~ Cookie Monster, Sesame Street
I don’t like to commit myself about heaven and hell. You see, I have friends in both places. ~ Mark Twain
She’s my friend because we both know what it’s like to have people be jealous of us. ~ Cher, Clueless
If you have crazy friends you have everything you’ll ever need. ~ Unknown
My imaginary friend thinks he has problems. ~ Unknown
I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal. ~ Jane Austen
It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you to the heart: the one to slander you and the other to get the news to you. ~ Mark Twain
The imaginary friends I had as a kid dropped me because their friends thought I didn’t exist. ~ Aaron Machado
You might also enjoy these funny quotes for Facebook posts .
Funny Quotes About Friendship
More clever quotes about the awesome uniqueness of friendship.
No friendship is an accident. ~ O. Henry
Friendship is being there when someone’s feeling low and not being afraid to kick them. ~ Randy K. Milholland
Friendship is one mind in two bodies. ~ Mencius
Knowledge cannot replace friendship. I’d rather be an idiot than lose you. ~ Patrick, Spongebob Squarepants
Friendship is so weird… You just pick a human you’ve met and you’re like ‘Yep, I like this one’ and you just do stuff with them. ~ Unknown
Friendship multiplies the good of life and divides the evil. ~ Baltasar Gracian
Friendship is born at the moment when one man says to another, What! You too? I thought I was the only one. ~ C.S. Lewis
Every man should have a fair-sized cemetery in which to bury the faults of his friends. ~ Henry Brooks Adams
Friendship is like money, easier made than kept. ~ Samuel Butler
Whoever says friendship is easy has obviously never had a true friend! ~ Bronwyn Polson
Friendship is a wildly underrated medication. ~ Anna Deavere Smith
Real friendship is when your friend comes over to your house and then you both just take a nap. ~ Unknown
‘Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense, and to have her nonsense respected. ~ Charles Lamb
Fan the sinking flame of hilarity with the wing of friendship; and pass the rosy wine. ~ Charles Dickens
It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like, ‘What about lunch?’ ~ A. A. Milne, Winnie the Pooh
To like and dislike the same things, that is what makes a solid friendship. ~ Sallust
The capacity for friendship is God’s way of apologizing for our families. ~ Jay McInerney, The Last of the Savages
One measure of friendship consists not in the number of things friends can discuss, but in the number of things they need no longer mention. ~ Clifton Fadiman
Friends are the siblings God never gave us. ~ Unknown
Funny Quotes on Friendship and Love
Eros will have naked bodies; friendship naked personalities. ~ C. S. Lewis
Love is friendship that has caught fire. ~ Ann Landers
Marriage: a friendship recognized by the police. ~ Robert Louis Stevenson
Love is blind; friendship tries not to notice. ~ Otto von Bismarck
Funny Friendship between Women
Friendship is not possible between two women, one of whom is very well dressed. ~ Laurie Colwin
One sure way to lose another woman’s friendship is to try to improve her flower arrangements. ~ Marcelene Cox
Men kick friendship around like a football, but it doesn’t seem to crack. Women treat it like glass, and it goes to pieces. ~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Have you seen these self-confidence quotes for women ?
Funny Quotes About True Friends
True friends, old friends, real friends – whatever you call them, you need them!
They last the test of time because they accept you as you are. These clever quotes say how.
A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked. ~ Bernard Meltzer
True friends stab you in the front. ~ Oscar Wilde
A loyal friend laughs at your jokes when they’re not so good, and sympathizes with your problems when they’re not so bad. ~ Arnold H. Glasgow
True friends are like diamonds: bright, beautiful, valuable, and always in style. ~ Nicole Richie
It’s the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter. ~ Marlene Dietrich
Only a true friend would be that truly honest. ~ Shrek, Shrek
You find out who your real friends are when you’re involved in a scandal. ~ Elizabeth Taylor
It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay. Like an octopus on your face. ~ Unknown
A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you. ~ Elbert Hubbard
Real friends don’t get offended when you insult them. They smile and call you something even more offensive. ~ Unknown
There is nothing like puking with somebody to make you into old friends. ~ Sylvia Plath
A messy house is a must: it separates your true friends from other friends. Real friends are there to visit you, not your house! ~ Jennifer Wilson
One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives. ~ Euripides
Anybody can sympathize with the sufferings of a friend, but it requires a very fine nature to sympathize with a friend’s success. ~ Oscar Wilde
If you wanna find out who’s a true friend, screw up or go through a challenging time … then see who sticks around. ~ Karen Salmansohn
You can always tell a real friend: When you’ve made a fool of yourself he doesn’t feel you’ve done a permanent job. ~ Laurence J. Peter
A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out. ~ Walter Winchell
The worst part of success is trying to find someone who is happy for you. ~ Bette Midler
The best mirror is an old friend. ~ George Herbert
Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down. ~ Oprah Winfrey
A friend to all is a friend to none. ~ Aristotle
‘Tis a great confidence in a friend to tell him your faults; greater to tell him his. ~ Benjamin Franklin
In my friend, I find a second self. ~ Isabel Norton
If you can survive 11 days in cramped quarters with a friend and come out laughing, your friendship is the real deal. ~ Oprah Winfrey
You might also like these funny one-liners .
Funny Quotes About Best Friends
One tier up from true friends are your besties! Lucky you, if you’ve got one.
Best friend isn’t a person; it’s a tier. ~ Mindy Kaling
Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food. ~ Unknown
A good friend will help you move. But a best friend will help you move a dead body ~ Jim Hayes
Friends make you smile. Best friends make you giggle ’til you pee your pants. ~ Terri Guillemets
I was an innocent being once. Then my best friend came along. ~ Unknown
Best friends don’t care if your house is clean. They care if you have wine. ~ Unknown
When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, “Damn, that was fun.” ~ Groucho Marx
You had me at “I hate her too.” ~ Unknown
I can tell by your sarcastic undertones, rude comments, and sheer lack of common decency that we should be best friends. ~ Unknown
A best friend is like a four-leaf clover, hard to find, lucky to have. ~ Unknown
Best friends: They know how crazy you are and still choose to be seen with you in public. ~ Unknown
Friends give you a shoulder to cry on. But best friends are ready with a shovel to hurt the person that made you cry. ~ Unknown
I’d walk through fire for my best friend. Well, not fire, that would be dangerous. But a super humid room… but not too humid because, you know… my hair. ~ Unknown
Life is an awful, ugly place to not have a best friend. ~ Sarah Dessen
Check out these dog best friend quotes !
Funny Sayings to Share with Friends
But don’t stop there. Here are sassy sayings to share with your BFFs – or all your Facebook friends!
You’ve got a friend in me. ~ Woody, Toy Story
I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole. ~ Unknown
You don’t have to be crazy to be my friend. I’ll train you. ~ Unknown
I will text you 50 times in a row and feel no shame. You’re my friend, you literally signed up for this. ~ Unknown
No one will ever be as entertained by us as us. ~ Unknown
We are best friends. Always remember that if you fall, I will pick you up. Right after I finish laughing. ~ Unknown
If I send you my ugly selfies, our friendship is real. ~ Unknown
It’s hard to find a friend who’s cute, loving, generous, caring, and smart. My advice to you is, don’t lose me! ~ Unknown
Which of all my important nothings shall I tell you first? ~ Jane Austen
We will always be friends ’til we’re old and senile. Then we can be new friends! ~ Unknown
You and I are more than friends. We’re like a really small gang. ~ Unknown
I think we’ll be friends forever because we’re too lazy to find new friends. ~ Unknown
Good friends don’t let you do stupid things – alone. ~ Unknown
We’ve been friends for so long, I can’t remember which one of us is the bad influence. ~ Unknown
I like you because you join in on my weirdness. ~ Unknown
Everyone is a complicated human being, and everyone is strong and weak and funny and scared. ~ Laverne Cox
True friendship is never serene. ~ Marquise de Sevigne
I am the friend you have to explain to your other friends before they meet me. ~ Unknown
You’re mad. Bonkers. Off your head. But I’ll tell you a secret: Some of the best people are. ~ Lewis Carroll, Alice In Wonderland
Let us be elegant or die! ~ Louisa May Alcott
All you need to do to be my friend is like me. ~ Taylor Swift
You might also like these Taylor Swift quotes about friendship .
Laugh with Friends
They say laughter is the best medicine – and nothing’s better than laughs shared with friends.
If you enjoyed this collection of quotes, pin an image to Pinterest, or tweet one out on X.
Love quotes for every season and reason? Check out the best quote sites .
About Louise Myers
Louise Myers is a graphic design expert whose designs have been featured by Disney, Macy's, WalMart and more. Her straightforward writing style empowers small business owners to make their own graphics for social media success!
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100 Jokes to Tell Your Friends (And Make Them Laugh)
Whether you want to spice up your group chat or are just looking for good jokes to tell your friends, you’ve come to the right place.
It can feel scary to tell jokes because there is pressure to make people laugh. But as long as you don’t take yourself too seriously and just have fun, you can’t go wrong.
Enjoy making yourself and your friends laugh with the following 100 jokes.
- Funniest jokes
- Jokes to tell over text
- Dirty jokes
- Funny knock-knock jokes
- Smart jokes
- Weird jokes
- Confusing jokes
Common questions
Funniest jokes to tell your friends.
If you’re looking for great jokes to tell your friends to make them laugh, then look no further. Here are 14 super funny jokes that are sure to make your friends laugh out loud.
1. Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs   2. What did the frustrated cat say? Are you kitten me right meow   3. What kind of tea is hard to swallow? Reality
4. What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything   5. How did the hamburger know he needed new pants? His buns were showing   6. What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account? Prime mates
7. What do you call a pile of cats? A meow-tain   8. If you’re American when you go into a bathroom and when you come out, what are you while you’re inside? European   9. What’s the leading cause of dry skin? Towels
10. When does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella? For drizzle   11. What kind of cereal do dads like? Corn flakes   12. When does a joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent
13. Why is it hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs? They always take things literally   14. If you see a robbery at an Apple store, what does it make you? An Iwitness
You might also be interested in this article about how to be funny in a conversation .
Dumb jokes to tell your friends
Stupid jokes are a different kind of funny. If you want to make your friends smile and possibly roll their eyes, then these silly jokes are sure to do the trick.
1. Why did the M&M go to school? Because he wanted to be a Smartie   2. Why was the candle happy? It was liiit   3. Why wouldn’t the sesame seed leave the casino? It was on a roll
4. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless   5. Why is Peter Pan always flying? He neverlands   6. What kind of pants does Mario wear? Denim denim denim
7. What did the buffalo say when his son left? Bison   8. Why did the chef die? He ran out of thyme   9. Where can you find your grandma in a hurry? Insta-gram
10. What do dentists call their x-rays? Tooth pics   11. Why did the farmer win an award? He was out standing in his field   12. Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe
13. My teachers told me my procrastination would keep me from being successful. I told them, “Just you wait!”   14. Why can’t a bike stand on its own? It’s two-tired   15. What did the duck say when it bought lip gloss? “Put it on my bill”
Jokes to tell your friends over text
If you don’t have the pleasure of seeing your friends every day, it’s important to keep your online conversations with them fun. The following are 9 super funny jokes that can help keep conversation flowing with your besties.
1. Do you know how I’m sure we’ll be friends forever? Because we’re too lazy to find other friends   2. Just remember that if you lose your shoe at the party tonight, it’s not cause it’s a fairytale… it’s cause you’re drunk   3. How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Look for fresh prints
4. Always remember not to take life too seriously. You’ll never get out of it alive   5. Wanna hear two short jokes and a long joke? Joke, joke, jooooooke   6. What do you call a Frenchman in sandals? Phillipe Floppe
7. Working in a mirror factory is something I could totally see myself doing   8. I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one   9. RIP to boiling water. You will be mist
Dirty jokes to tell your friends
If you’re looking for clean funny jokes to tell your friends, then look elsewhere. These are hilarious jokes for adults that are a little bit on the crazy side. They are perfect for sending to your dirty-minded friends.
1. What did the elephant ask the naked man? How do you breathe out of that thing?   2. Why did the ketchup blush? He saw the salad dressing   3. What’s the best thing about gardening? Getting down and dirty with your hoes
4. What do you call a person who doesn’t masturbate? A liar   5. Why don’t witches wear underwear? Because they need a better grip   6. What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? I want you inside me
Bad jokes to tell your friends
The following are corny jokes that you might find a little cringey, but be honest, who doesn’t love a good dad joke? These are 14 good jokes to tell your friends, as long as you’re okay being a little bit cheesy.
1. Why did the bee get married? He found his honey   2. Why can’t you trust atoms? Because they make up everything   3. Why do mushrooms get invited to every party? Because they’re fun-gis
4. Do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An ir-relephant   5. Where did Napoleon keep his armies? In his sleevies   6. What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work? A can’t opener
7. I can’t tell if I like my blender or not… It keeps giving me mixed results   8. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together   9. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta
10. Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9   11. What do you call a cold dog? A chili dog   12. What did the bartender say to the horse? Why the long face
13. Who keeps the ocean clean? Mer-maids   14. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus
You can also check out this article about how to be more fun around people .
Funny knock-knock jokes to tell your kids
Knock-knock jokes can be a little annoying for adults, but they’re great to tell kids. If you’re looking for very funny jokes to share with your kids to strengthen your bond and make them laugh, then the following 9 jokes are perfect.
1. Knock knock – Who’s there – Annie – Annie who? – Annie body gonna open this door?   2. Knock knock – Who’s there – Nana – Nana who? – Nana your business   3. Knock knock – Who’s there – Spell – Spell who? – W-H-O
4. Knock knock – Who’s there – Justin – Justin who? – Justin the neighborhood, thought I’d stop by   5. Knock knock – Who’s there – Cows go – Cows go who – No cows go moo   6. Knock knock – Who’s there – Boo – Boo who? – Why are you crying?
7. Knock knock – Who’s there – Beets – Beets who? – Beets me   8. Knock knock – Who’s there – Honey bee – Honey bee who? – Honey bee a dear, and open the door   9. Knock knock – Who’s there? – Turnip – Turnip who – Turnip this song! It’s my favorite
Smart jokes to tell your friends
If you or your friends are a fan of dry humor, then these are the best cool jokes to tell your friends. They’re also PG enough to share with coworkers or tell your mates at school.
1. What’s the best way to flirt with a math teacher? Use acute angle   2. What did the DNA say to the other DNA? Do these genes make me look fat?   3. What’s the most terrifying word in nuclear physics? “Oops”
4. What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?   5. A photon is going through airport security. The TSA agent asks if he has any luggage. The photon says, “No, I’m traveling light.”   6. Anybody who believes in telekinesis, raise my hand
You might also be interested in this article on how to banter .
Weird jokes to tell your friends
Try telling your friends these random jokes to make them laugh.
1. Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs   2. Where do you learn to make a banana split? At sundae school   3. What did the mime say to the audience? Nothing, because he’s a professional, duh
4. Why did the invisible man turn down the job? He couldn’t see himself doing it   5. What’s the best way to burn 1000 calories? Leave the pizza in the oven   6. If athletes get athlete’s foot, what do elves get? Mistle-toes
7. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot   8. What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk   9. What do you call an empty can of Cheese Whiz? Cheese was
10. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it
Dark jokes to tell your friends
The following jokes are a little messed up, but they can be pretty funny jokes to tell your friends when they’re feeling sad or need a pick-me-up. Just make sure they’re a fan of mean jokes.
1. How do you know you’re ugly? If you always get handed the camera for group photos   2. What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage   3. What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick
4. I have many jokes about unemployed people. Sadly, none of them work   5. My grandfather said my generation relies too much on technology. So I unplugged his life support
Confusing jokes to tell your friends
The following are 5 tricky jokes to tell your friends, with answers included. Stump your friends with the following random jokes.
1. How do you drown a hipster? In the mainstream   2. What’s the dumbest animal in the jungle? A polar bear   3. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river
4. What starts with an “E,” ends with an “E” and only has one letter in it? An envelope   5. What runs around a yard without ever moving? A fence
Pun jokes to tell your friends
If your friends enjoy dry humor, then have fun making them laugh with the following punny jokes.
1. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one   2. How can you tell if a vampire is sick? By how much he is coffin   3. Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages? There were too many knights
4. What kind of concert only costs 45 cents? A 50 Cent concert featuring Nickelback   5. What kind of shoes do burglars wear? Sneakers   6. How do you talk to an Italian ghost? With a Luigi board
7. What do you call a magician who lost their magic? Ian
How do you tell funny jokes to your friends?
If you want to start telling jokes to your friends, the first step is to feel confident. Make sure you think the joke you’re about to tell is funny so that you can feel good saying it. Even if the joke doesn’t land, don’t be discouraged. Laugh at yourself, and try again another time.
Viktor is a Counselor specialized in interpersonal communication and relationships. He manages SocialSelf’s scientific review board. Follow on Twitter or read more .
How to Become Friends With Someone (Fast)
210 questions to ask friends (for all situations), 23 tips to bond with someone (and form a deep connection), how to banter (with examples for any situation), 21 tips to be more fun and less boring to be around, 25 tips to be witty (if you’re not a quick thinker), how to be funny in a conversation (for non-funny people), 21 comments.
Thanks I love your jokes to
I love your jokes to
I love your jokes i have some too
Great jokes. Very funny
A guy said “why did you reject that woman? she is so hot.” The other guy said ” because I am a sigma” 🥶
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot’s house. Knock knock. “Who’s there?” The chicken
1. Knock knock – Who’s there – Annie – Annie who? – Annie body gonna open this door?
2. Knock knock – Who’s there – Nana – Nana who? – Nana your business
3. Knock knock – Who’s there – Spell – Spell who? – W-H-O
4. Knock knock – Who’s there – Justin – Justin who? – Justin the neighborhood, thought I’d stop by
5. Knock knock – Who’s there – Cows go – Cows go who – No cows go moo
6. Knock knock – Who’s there – Boo – Boo who? – Why are you crying?
7. Knock knock – Who’s there – Beets – Beets who? – Beets me
8. Knock knock – Who’s there – Honey bee – Honey bee who? – Honey bee a dear, and open the door
that is so funny lol
Hahaha my mate pissed himself listing to these you want a joke did I hear
-what did the toilet say to the other toilet Skiberty Ohio toilet with Kia cenats rizz on top
Guy goes into a car dealership and says he likes a specific vehicle. Salesman replies yes but theres only one problem, the vehicle has no reverse. Guy says thats ok i,m not coming back.
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All of the jokes were funny but not enough.Also theres a joke right here and here.
why did the child eat his homework? because the teacher said it was a peace of cake. why did the golfer bring 2 pairs of pants? just incase he got a hole in one.oof ı got 2 hole in ones.said the golfer
the first was joke was so funny you deserve a cupcake
Yes I enjoyed all the jokes
Very funny!
Yea it was funny
I love your joke’s
lol! there so funny
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