first sentence essay examples

Anne R. Allen's Blog... with Ruth Harris

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April 28, 2018 By Anne R. Allen 53 Comments

How to Write a Great First Sentence—with 22 Inspiring Examples

First sentences from classic and contemporary literature analyzed.

by Ruth Harris

No matter what genre you write, your first sentence is a seduction. It can be in the form of an invitation. A declaration. A tease. A promise. A jolt. A shock.

You must be shameless and your first sentence must be irresistible. It must induce curiosity and promise the answer to an urgent question.

You must do whatever you can to lure your reader into the web you’ve woven by writing a sentence so provocative and so powerful that s/he is compelled to continue.

You’re the master of ceremonies and in your first sentence you must present yourself and your book with confidence and authority. If you’ve written a thriller, your first sentence must promise thrills. If you’ve written a romance, your first sentence must promise romance.

Just like a nothingburger cover or a  meh  blurb, a clunky or poorly-conceived first sentence that’s inconsistent with your genre, will turn readers off and cause them to skip your book.

Whether you’re writing fiction or non-fiction, romance or sci fi, a thriller or a mystery, the first sentence of your book must achieve one goal: compel the reader to read on.

Stephen King has said that he spends “months and years” creating that first line. He goes on to say: “An opening line should invite the reader to begin the story. It should say: Listen. Come in here. You want to know about this.”

The question is, how do we accomplish all this in one sentence? From  Moby Dick ’s “ Call me Ishmael”  to  Charles Dickens’  “ It was the best of times, it was the worst of times ,” some first sentences have become famous classics. So, too, Jane Austen’s “ It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.”

A deeper look into the breadth of masterful first sentences offers a wide array of the ways writers draw readers into their stories and inspiring examples of how much information can be conveyed in a single sentence.

The First Person Introduction.

In a memoir or a novel written in the first person, the author puts himself in the mind of the central character and, in one way or another, tells us that we are about to get the real deal. No BS here, the sentence promises, just the honest, unvarnished truth about someone we want to know more about.

Sylvia Plath uses the first sentence of  The Bell Jar , to establish the nervous, dark mood that hovers over the character and the story. Her story begins—

“It was a queer, sultry summer, the summer they electrocuted the Rosenbergs, and I didn’t know what I was doing in New York.”

Plath’s use of the word  electrocuted  provides an unexpected jolt and mention of the  Rosenbergs  sets a time (June 1953).  Sultry summer  sets an uncomfortable season,  New York  establishes a place, and the final phrase conveys the uncertainty of a young woman struggling to find an identity and a place in life.

Vladimir Nabokov uses the first nine words of  Lolita  to convey the note of obsessive erotic desire that pulses through the entire novel.

“Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins.”

Nabokov begins by naming the object of his passion, the word  light  expresses her transformative influence on the narrator, the word  loins  promises that we will be reading a story about sex, and the repetition of the letter  l  creates the feeling of an incantation.

In  Ghostwriters In The Sky , Book 1 of The Camilla Randall Mysteries, Anne uses her first sentence to introduce the MC, locate the place (the subway can only mean NYC), and refer to the season (sweaty indicates hot, most likely summer).

“The subway car was so crowded I couldn’t tell which one of the sweaty men pressing against me was attached to the hand now creeping up my thigh.”

The phrase “creeping up my thigh” indicates a level of unwanted personal attention which places the character in an uncomfortable, if rather ludicrous situation—a theme that will be repeated in different variations throughout the novel.

In  Catcher In the Rye , J.D. Salinger uses an effective but contradictory combination of bravado and vulnerability to establish a unique voice as he introduces us to preppy Holden Caulfield.

“If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you’ll probably want to know is where I was born, and what my lousy childhood was like, and how my parents were occupied and all before they had me, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I don’t feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth. 

We read on because Salinger’s confessional tone makes us want to know more about his  lousy childhood  and find out why he doesn’t feel like going into it.

The Third Person Introduction.

In  Goldfinger , Ian Fleming introduces 007 in the first sentence.

“James Bond, with two double bourbons inside him, sat in the final departure lounge of Miami airport and thought about life and death.”

Fleming has told us in only a few words that his MC is a drinking man, one who travels, and one who contemplates the larger questions of existence. Where, we wonder, is Bond going, what is he going to do once he gets there, and why does he need to down  two double bourbons  before he boards his flight?

In  The Hobbit , JRR Tolkien simply tells us where his MC lives, but in such a startling way that we feel compelled to read on.

“In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit.”

A hobbit? A story about a creature who lives in a hole? Who or what is this hobbit and why does he live in a hole. Curious, we read on.

I introduce DeeDee Dahlen, the MC in  Love And Money , Book 1 of the Park Avenue Series with a brief, declarative sentence.

“Her name was DeeDee Dahlen and she was famous from the day she was born.”

How can a newly-born infant be famous?, the reader wonders. What rewards—and penalties—does unasked-for celebrity impose? What secrets and scandal will shadow her future?—urgent questions that will reverberate throughout the entire novel.

Graham Greene, in  Brighton Rock , compels us to want to know more.

“Hale knew, before he had been in Brighton three hours, that they meant to murder him.”

Who are the ‘they?’ we wonder. And what has Hale done? Why do ‘they’ want to kill him?

Gabriel Garcia Marquez begins  One Hundred Years of Solitude  with this famous sentence—

“Many years later, as he faced the firing squad, Colonel Aureliano Buendia was to remember that distant afternoon when his father took him to discover ice.”

The author uses a shocking situation—a man facing a firing squad—plus a long-ago memory to pique our curiosity. Who is the Colonel and what had he done that he ends up facing a firing squad? What was there about the discovery of ice that it has lodged so forcefully in his memory? Compelling questions to which we must find the answer and, thus, we continue to read.

Whether classic literature, hard-boiled pulp fiction, or cyberpunk scifi, the first sentence establishes a theme that will continue throughout the story. If the book does not follow through on the promise of that first sentence, the disappointed reader will feel cheated.

In his first sentence, Leo Tolstoy in  Anna Karenina  tells us that we are about to read a story about an unhappy family.

“All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.”

Why, we ask ourselves, are they unhappy? What has happened to them and what will they do? Powerful questions the reader wants answered.

James Matthew Barrie establishes the theme of  Peter Pan  with a brief, declarative statement.

“All children, except one, grow up.”

Which child, we wonder. Why not? And what will happen to a child who doesn’t grow up?

A far different theme is set by Franz Kafka in his posthumously published 1925 novel,  The Trial.

Someone must have slandered Josef K., for one morning, without having done anything truly wrong, he was arrested.

Kafka’s first sentence thrusts us immediately into the MC’s waking nightmare of terror and paranoia that will be sustained throughout the story.

William Gibson’s  Neuromancer  was the first novel to win the Nebula Award, the Philip K. Dick Award, and the Hugo Award. The chilling first sentence, said to have been written at the last minute, sets the novel’s theme of a burnt-out computer hacker adrift in a dystopian near future governed by artificial intelligence.

“The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel.”

Hunter S Thompson, starts his novel,  Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas , by establishing a place, a mood, and a theme (a disenchanted retrospective look at the 1960s) in the first sentence.

“We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.”

A Tease, a Shock, a Jolt.

A skillfully written first sentence containing a tease, a shock or a jolt can introduce a character, establish a tone or a setting, and dare the reader not to continue.

The first sentence of  Nineteen Eighty-Four,  George Orwell’s dystopian novel, often considered one of the best one hundred books of the 20 th  Century, tells us immediately that something—time itself—is awry in a future world of Big Brother, doublethink and government surveillance.

“It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen.”

Joe Konrath pulls us right into the action in the first sentence of his mystery thriller,  Dirty Martini , Book 4 of the Jacqueline “Jack” Daniels Mystery series.

“No security cameras this time, but he still has to be careful.”

What is he doing, we wonder? In his first sentence, Konrath lets us know that whatever it is, it’s something he’s done before. Something risky, perhaps dangerous, and, even though experienced, he still has to be careful. Of what? Of whom?

In his legal thriller,  The Firm , John Grisham uses his first sentence to tell us that this unnamed and mysterious senior partner will indeed find something to dislike about Mitchell Y. McDeere who, the word  résumé  indicates, is being considered for a job.

“The senior partner studied the résumé for the hundredth time and again found nothing he disliked about Mitchell Y. McDeere, at least not on paper.”

What kind of job, we wonder, and what will the senior partner find to dislike? Grisham’s tease promises evil doings and the reader is lured on.

In  L.A. Confidential,  James Ellroy’s first sentence introduces a main character, sets a theme, and tells us exactly what we are about to read. Ellroy uses a knowledgable tone and vernacular language to let us know that he knows what he’s talking about.

“An abandoned auto court in the San Berdoo foothills; Buzz Meeks checked in with ninety-four thousand dollars, eighteen pounds of high-grade heroin, a 10-gauge pump, a .38 special, a .45 automatic, and a switchblade he’d bought off a pachuco at the border—right before he spotted the car parked across the line: Mickey Cohen goons in an LAPD unmarked, Tijuana cops standing by to bootsack his goodies, dump his body in the San Ysidro River.”

Dennis Lehane, in his short story,  Until Gwen  pulls us in with the use of the second person combined with the promise of drugs and sex.

“Your father picks you up from prison in a stolen Dodge Neon, with an 8-ball of coke in the glove compartment and a hooker named Mandy in the back seat.”

The Rule Breakers.

Although writers are often cautioned about starting a book with a character’s dream, that rule was effectively broken in the classic first sentence of Daphne DuMaurier’s famous gothic mystery,  Rebecca .

“Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again.”

Marie Force begins her Gansett Island romance,  Meant For Love , with a reference to a dream.

“The dream was always the same, the last perfect moment before life as Jenny Wilks knew it changed forever.”

Both dreams refer to emotionally significant aspects of the characters’ pasts. The reader wonders why the unidentified first-person narrator of  Rebecca  dreams of a place and Jenny Wilks of a “perfect” life now gone forever. The authors use dreams to provoke interest in their characters and in the events of the story to come.

The passive tense is usually considered to be another no-no. Charles McCarry, in  TheTears Of Autumn, considered to be one of the best espionage thrillers of the 20 th  Century, uses the passive tense to introduce American intelligence officer, Paul Christopher, who is investigating the assassination of John F. Kennedy.

“Paul Christopher had been loved by two women who could not understand why he had stopped writing poetry.”

McCarry’s elegant use of the passive tense to introduce his MC sets the theme of the book: an exploration of glittering promise that results in the wreckage of unintended consequences—the end of poetry and the end of Camelot.

Your first sentence is your opportunity to let your creativity shine. Whether you decide to go for a tease or a jolt, a theme or a rule breaker, a first person or third person introduction, remember what Mom always said: You never have a second chance to make a first impression.

For more info on beginnings, Anne and I have both opined about first chapters. For  Anne’s take . For  Ruth’s take .

by Ruth Harris (@RuthHarrisBooks) April 29, 2018

What about you, scriveners? Do you have a favorite first line? Do you find your first line hard to write? (I usually write mine last.) Do you have a dynamite first line for a book you haven’t written yet? 

This week Anne is Poisoning People for Fun and Profit again. This time she’s talking about Gelsemium , a pretty plant that may be growing in your own backyard. And is so deadly it’s the drug of choice of many professional assassins. It also nearly killed Arthur Conan Doyle.

BOOK OF THE WEEK

OPPORTUNITY ALERTS

Central Coasters: Don’t miss the “Writers in Action: From Idea to Publication” Workshop  on May 19th! 1-day workshop by Sisters in Crime, Central Coast at the PG&E Energy Center in San Luis Obispo. Should be a lot of fun. Here’s a link to the application form and lunch menu.

Red Hen Press annual Nonfiction Contest.    $25 entry FEE. $1,000 prize and publication by the prestigious Red Hen Press. They’re looking for an essay collection, memoir, or book of narrative nonfiction. Florencia Ramirez will judge. Using the online submission system, submit a manuscript of at least 150 pages.  Deadline April 30

CRAFT Literary Short Story contest. $20 FEE .  Short fiction up to 6000 words. $2000 first prize; the two runners-up will receive $500 and $300, respectively. plus publication in CRAFT  Literary Magazine. Deadline April 30th.

Mad Scientist Journal: Battling in All Her Finery.  Genre : Speculative fiction stories about women leaders in any field.  Payment : 2 cents/word.  Deadline: April 30, 2018.

13 Imprints of Big 5 publishers who take unagented submissions. From the good people at Authors Publish Magazine.

Supernatural Fiction Award : $1000 prize + publication in The Ghost Story magazine. Not just ghost stories. Any paranormal story welcome. 1500-10,000 words   $20 entry fee. Deadline April 30 th .

Prophecy Creek Book Award for Speculative Fiction . Prize $1,000 and publication by Hidden River Publishing.  Any length novel that includes elements of science fiction, supernatural fiction, or fantasy. $22 fee. Deadline May 15.

Smokelong Quarterly Flash Fiction contest. $13 Fee.  Under 1000 words. Nominates for Pushcart. Must never have been published (including on blogs.) $1500 prize plus publication. Runner-up prizes, too. Deadline May 20th. 

Nowhere Spring Travel Writing Contest   $10 Fee.  800-5000 words showing a powerful sense of place: Fiction or nonfiction. Previous publication okay. $1000 prize plus publication in Nowhere magazine. Deadline May 31st

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About Anne R. Allen

Anne writes funny mysteries and how-to-books for writers. She also writes poetry and short stories on occasion. Oh, yes, and she blogs. She's a contributor to Writer's Digest and the Novel and Short Story Writer's Market.

Her bestselling Camilla Randall Mystery RomCom Series features perennially down-on-her-luck former socialite Camilla Randall—who is a magnet for murder, mayhem and Mr. Wrong, but always solves the mystery in her quirky, but oh-so-polite way.

Anne lives on the Central Coast of California, near San Luis Obispo, the town Oprah called "The Happiest City in America."

April 29, 2018 at 10:27 am

I didn’t fully appreciate the importance of the first line until after my first book. I am proud of the first lines of the next three books, especially the two that say so much about the character. Those are excellent examples and a good breakdown as to why they work. Knowing that is half the struggle.

April 29, 2018 at 12:54 pm

Alex—Thanks! Congratulations on your quality first lines….knowing what and where the target is makes it so much easier to score!

April 29, 2018 at 11:10 am

Couldn’t agree more Ruth, and it’s one of my favorite topics to cover with aspiring authors on the library-circuit. It’s one of those things a newish writer hasn’t truly considered, but they light up when you show examples like these gems (we overlap with several!). I would suggest there’s also the out-and-out lunatic opening to consider, like Ian Banks who set the bar pretty high with his opening to “The Crow Road” (1992):

“It was the day my grandmother exploded.”

Tell me who’s going to put that one back on the rack!

April 29, 2018 at 12:56 pm

Will—Love the Ian Banks first line. Thanks for the great addition!

April 29, 2018 at 11:28 am

Excellent! I particularly like the constellation of 1st person examples: Plath, Nabokov, Salinger, & Allen! Well-chosen, indeed. And, as I am big-idea person more than an analytical person, I love seeing these split into categories — I simply wouldn’t think to do that to these fine examples, but it helps me conceptualize it all. Thanks again.

April 29, 2018 at 12:59 pm

CS—Thanks and happy to hear my category breakdown helped. There are infinite ways to write a great first sentence!

April 29, 2018 at 1:39 pm

I love the topic you chose for today, Ruth, and the way you take a close, illuminating look at each one. Thanks so much for the insight.

I think you had one or two short story first lines in the mix, and I’m glad for that.(I write short stories.) I think an awesome first line is every bit as important in short stories. (Last line too.)

Tolstoy’s Anna Kerenina first line is also an example of what I think has the potential to be powerful: A truism, or a simple philosophical (sort of) statement. He certainly nails it with this one!

An article on great last lines would be a fascinating complement to this one.

April 29, 2018 at 4:32 pm

Tricia—thanks! Yes, the Dennis Lehane first sentence was from a short story. First sentences matter!

April 29, 2018 at 2:35 pm

My favourite opening line is from J.G. Ballard’s ‘High-Rise’:

“Later, as he sat on his balcony eating the dog, Dr Robert Laing reflected on the unusual events that had taken place within this huge apartment building during the previous three months.”

It sets tone, character, place…and the opportunity to decline an invitation to proceed.

April 29, 2018 at 4:34 pm

Patricia—that’s just great! Thanks!

April 29, 2018 at 3:44 pm

I used my favorite first line in an email signature that earned me a visit from the President of the college; he never made me take it down, but I knew somebody had asked about it nonetheless. From James Crumley’s Last Good Kiss: “When I finally caught up with Abraham Trahearne, he was drinking beer with an alcoholic bulldog named Fireball Roberts in a ramshackle joint just outside of Sonoma, California, drinking the heart right out of a fine spring afternoon.” I can smell that wasted, lost afternoon, I know the likes of Abraham Trahearne right up front, and one day I’m going to name my new bulldog Fireball Roberts.

April 29, 2018 at 4:38 pm

Ruthie—thanks for another fabulous first line! Wonder if anyone would name a kitten Fireball Roberts? Nah, don’t think so. 😉

April 29, 2018 at 4:35 pm

Sorry to be picky, but there are two typos in this article…which, by the way, is great. This a wonderful collection of first lines, some of which I’ve never seen before. ‘auto court’, I think, rather than ‘auto cout’ – although maybe this is a type of area I’ve not come across before! And Mr Grisham gets spelt as Grosham at one point….

April 29, 2018 at 4:47 pm

Mcrow—Thanks for your eagle eye! I wondered about “cout” but that’s how it came up in my research so I decided to go with it. Maybe a regionalism? Grissom is just a plain vanilla typo. (As I type this, tho, autocorrect turns it into Grissom.) lol

April 30, 2018 at 8:53 am

This is such a great post. I love to look at the first line of a book. It really does either pull you in … or not. I really liked ““All children, except one, grow up.” I’ve never read the book. Maybe now I will. I always try to write a first line or at least the first few lines in a way that the reader will wonder what’s going to happen next and what’s going on. Thanks for this.

April 30, 2018 at 11:24 am

Patricia—thanks for the kind words. First lines are well worth the effort.:)

April 30, 2018 at 10:01 am

First lines are tough and hard to make appealing to a large group of people–even within our own genres.

One I like is: This is the way the world ends – not with a band or a whimper, but with zombies breaking down the back door. – Hollowland by Amanda Hocking

I love the call back to Eliot with a fantasy twist.

April 30, 2018 at 11:27 am

HR—thanks for another good example and fine analysis!

April 30, 2018 at 5:48 pm

Thanks so much for this insightful look into first lines, Ruth. A good reminder to go over some of my old favs and revisit first lines in particular. 🙂

May 1, 2018 at 6:11 am

Dg—appreciate your kind words. Have fun with your old faves!

April 30, 2018 at 6:41 pm

Thanks for this article! I was inspired to re-check out some first lines. I’m pretty happy with the first lines of my two fantasy novels…the second one took a long time. The whole first chapter and especially the first paragraph went through a dozen false starts before I managed to like one I tried. But the first line of Stephen King’s “The Gunslinger” is wonderful–and it must be, as it begins not only a novel, but an epic seven-book series. The line: “The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed.”

May 1, 2018 at 6:15 am

Fred—*only* a dozen tries? Wow! Speedy. ;-). Thanks for the excellent Stephen King addition. Much appreciated!

May 6, 2018 at 4:32 pm

Not really speedy. I had it published about twenty-two years after I finished the first draft. I’m finishing a paranormal romance and beginning a fantasy series. Thanks to your article I re-examined, and changed, the first sentence of each one. And of course I may do so again before I’m finished. My thanks to you and Anne both for all these great helpful blogs.

May 1, 2018 at 6:47 am

Wow, those are some great first lines. I’ve always found first lines hard to write and this post has really motivated me to make sure the promise I’m making to my audience is there inside it.

One of my favorite first lines is from the manga Fullmetal Alchemist (English Translation):

“Teachings that do not speak of pain have no meaning…for humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return.”

May 1, 2018 at 7:25 am

Amy—happy to hear the post helped. 🙂 thanks,too, for the excellent addition to our first lines!

May 1, 2018 at 7:30 am

I often write my first lines after the first draft. Rather, I should say, I “rewrite” my first line a gazillion times after the first draft. Great post, Ruth. Thanks for the inspiration!

May 1, 2018 at 11:06 am

Sue—yes! It’s not the writing. It’s the rewriting. + the revisions. Facts of life! 😉

May 1, 2018 at 10:17 pm

I love, love, love first sentences. I’ve written hundreds of them! If only I had completed stories to go with all with my first lines….heavy sigh. Enjoyed the post.

May 2, 2018 at 4:13 am

Tammy—ditto and thanks. Maybe find the love for second sentences? 😉

May 6, 2018 at 8:26 am

A great article, Anne.

May 6, 2018 at 12:20 pm

Robbie–The thanks go entirely to Ruth. Not only did she write the piece. but she chose the image this time too. I thought it was perfect!

May 6, 2018 at 4:52 pm

Robbie—glad to learn you enjoyed the post!

May 6, 2018 at 10:31 am

3 greatest are from Moby Dick, Old Man and Sea and Tale of 2 Cities. Oh, and that “In the beginning…” one is pretty famous too.

May 6, 2018 at 1:10 pm

Carl—thanks for the suggestions. We should also add “once upon a time.” 🙂

May 7, 2018 at 3:55 am

Yes, of course !

May 6, 2018 at 4:50 pm

Fredwaiss—22 years? Definitely not speedy! I stand corrected. 🙂 Pleased to learn the post encouraged you to go back and review your first lines. Anne and I work with the goal of helping writers avoid the mistakes we made!

May 8, 2018 at 12:23 pm

Great post, thanks! It was a dark and stormy night…?????

May 8, 2018 at 12:52 pm

M. L.—Perfecto! A truly worthy addition! 🙂

May 8, 2018 at 1:08 pm

Great article Ruth! I have a harder time with LAST lines but reading this reminded me of an unread book I peeked at while unpacking last week that made me want to sit in the pile boxes to keep reading:

“Even before I push the fucking door open I know.” First line of IN SIGHT OF THE STARS by Gae Polisner.

I’m a little envious of that opening…

May 8, 2018 at 2:06 pm

Eldonna—Thanks. 🙂 Thanks, too, for adding another great first sentence!

May 10, 2018 at 3:17 pm

What a fun post – and great comments with more first lines – love it! Thanks for this.

My favorite for description is from IN COLD BLOOD by Truman Capote because of the contrast with the title:

“The village of Holcomb stands on the high wheat plains of western Kansas, a lonesome area that other Kansans call ‘out there.’ ”

and my favorite for ‘you had me at the first line’ (technically, 3 sentences, they could have been separated by commas… but it would change the rhythm) still, it got me and I read this one, then pretty much all his other books in a 2-month binge. It’s in STRAIGHT by Dick Francis:

“I inherited my brother’s life. Inherited his desk, his business, his gadgets, his enemies, his horses and his mistress. I inherited my brother’s life, and it nearly killed me.”

May 10, 2018 at 5:58 pm

Msmartha—Thanks for the kind words—and for two great suggestions! I recall a lengthy dick Francis binge, too. 🙂

June 3, 2018 at 3:09 pm

I don’t have a favorite first line, sorry! I opened an email from you and saw this as title as one of your previous posts and was intrigued. Fantastic post! I’m starting my new WIP today and you’ve inspired me to nail down that first line of my WIP. Thanks!

June 3, 2018 at 4:16 pm

Fiona—Ruth Harris here. Glad you enjoyed the post! Even happier to learn it was inspiring. Good luck with your great first sentence!

October 7, 2018 at 3:21 pm

“If there were a way, if I could, I would write this book in sign language.” Ruth Sidranski’s first line in her memoir entitled In Silence.

October 7, 2018 at 4:48 pm

Katherine—excellent! Thank you.

October 28, 2019 at 8:58 am

I read and try to write romance. This is my favorite opening line from a romance novel, The Best Man by Kristan Higgins:

“On a beautiful day in June, in front of literally half the town, wearing a wedding dress that made her look like Cinderella and holding a bouquet of perfect pink roses, Faith Elizabeth Holland was left at the altar.”

It was my first book by Kristan Higgins, but I can assure you it wasn’t my last!

October 28, 2019 at 10:24 am

Dena Jo—Wonderful! Thanks for a great addition to the list of compelling first lines. Appreciated! 🙂

November 21, 2019 at 6:54 am

First lines–yes! I waffled when I started to write my first book. (A fantasy novel based on a D&D scenario I wrote.) I decided to self-publish it after an agent who had taken me on tried to get me to publish with a publisher who asked for a lot of money. At least it was a lot to me. I was proud of that book, but it took far too long to get to the story proper. I wrote part 2 of the series and published it. Then I found a publisher for my next book, who wanted to take on my previously published books, so I took the opportunity of rewriting the beginning. I cut at least the first 4 chapters and began where the protagonist and his friends were given their quest. A much better beginning,I think.

November 21, 2019 at 1:34 pm

V.M.—Thanks for the great comment! Sounds like you’re on the right track by cutting your early chapters and starting with the quest. And yes, indeed, sometimes getting a book right does take “too long.” Frustrating but worth it!

June 19, 2020 at 5:30 am

so I wrote a first paragraph and I was hoping that someone might help me with critiquing it “You know that every time I peek my head through this window and see the tower, my heart fills with uneasiness, how it pokes into the sky here in Paris and is quite the centerpiece in the culture. Of course, I was talking about the Eiffel tower, the looming feeling I get measures to about the amount you get when you see the corpse of a person next to a puddle of blood with a 15mm Occitane Pistol floating along slowly to a sewer pipe. When you know whatever caused it can just peek out and get you too, slide its fingers along the side of the trigger, and in seconds your years of life have come to an end. ” by the way, Occitane is a region in France, in the book I am writing it also holds a secret underground gun producing factory.

June 19, 2020 at 6:26 am

Noah—Thanks for taking the time to comment. Anne and I do not offer critique services, but wish you the best of luck with your book.

August 15, 2021 at 4:10 pm

Here’s the first sentence of my second novel, plus the short one that follows:

“Who was that,” Greg asked as he and Josie drove home from the folk dance, “the fiddler, singing, at the end? You know him?” Jealousy tainted his question.

It seems to set up the emotional tension that permeates the book.

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Check and revise – checklist for essay introduction , key takeaways , frequently asked questions .

An introduction is the opening section of an essay, paper, or other written work. It introduces the topic and provides background information, context, and an overview of what the reader can expect from the rest of the work. 1 The key is to be concise and to the point, providing enough information to engage the reader without delving into excessive detail. 

The essay introduction is crucial as it sets the tone for the entire piece and provides the reader with a roadmap of what to expect. Here are key elements to include in your essay introduction: 

• Hook : Start with an attention-grabbing statement or question to engage the reader. This could be a surprising fact, a relevant quote, or a compelling anecdote. 
• Background information : Provide context and background information to help the reader understand the topic. This can include historical information, definitions of key terms, or an overview of the current state of affairs related to your topic. 
• Thesis statement : Clearly state your main argument or position on the topic. Your thesis should be concise and specific, providing a clear direction for your essay. 

Before we get into how to write an essay introduction, we need to know how it is structured. The structure of an essay is crucial for organizing your thoughts and presenting them clearly and logically. It is divided as follows: 2  

• Introduction:  The introduction should grab the reader’s attention with a hook, provide context, and include a thesis statement that presents the main argument or purpose of the essay.  
• Body:  The body should consist of focused paragraphs that support your thesis statement using evidence and analysis. Each paragraph should concentrate on a single central idea or argument and provide evidence, examples, or analysis to back it up.  
• Conclusion:  The conclusion should summarize the main points and restate the thesis differently. End with a final statement that leaves a lasting impression on the reader. Avoid new information or arguments. 

Here’s a step-by-step guide on how to write an essay introduction: 

• Start with a Hook : Begin your introduction paragraph with an attention-grabbing statement, question, quote, or anecdote related to your topic. The hook should pique the reader’s interest and encourage them to continue reading. 
• Provide Background Information : This helps the reader understand the relevance and importance of the topic. 
• State Your Thesis Statement : The last sentence is the main argument or point of your essay. It should be clear, concise, and directly address the topic of your essay. 
• Preview the Main Points : This gives the reader an idea of what to expect and how you will support your thesis. 
• Keep it Concise and Clear : Avoid going into too much detail or including information not directly relevant to your topic. 
• Revise : Revise your introduction after you’ve written the rest of your essay to ensure it aligns with your final argument. 

Unsure of how to start your essay introduction? Leverage Paperpal’s Generative AI templates to provide a base for your essay introduction. Here’s an example of an essay outline generated by Paperpal.  

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This is one of the key steps in how to write an essay introduction. Crafting a compelling hook is vital because it sets the tone for your entire essay and determines whether your readers will stay interested. A good hook draws the reader in and sets the stage for the rest of your essay.  

• Avoid Dry Fact : Instead of simply stating a bland fact, try to make it engaging and relevant to your topic. For example, if you’re writing about the benefits of exercise, you could start with a startling statistic like, “Did you know that regular exercise can increase your lifespan by up to seven years?” 
• Avoid Using a Dictionary Definition : While definitions can be informative, they’re not always the most captivating way to start an essay. Instead, try to use a quote, anecdote, or provocative question to pique the reader’s interest. For instance, if you’re writing about freedom, you could begin with a quote from a famous freedom fighter or philosopher. 
• Do Not Just State a Fact That the Reader Already Knows : This ties back to the first point—your hook should surprise or intrigue the reader. For Here’s an introduction paragraph example, if you’re writing about climate change, you could start with a thought-provoking statement like, “Despite overwhelming evidence, many people still refuse to believe in the reality of climate change.” 

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Including background information in the introduction section of your essay is important to provide context and establish the relevance of your topic. When writing the background information, you can follow these steps: 

• Start with a General Statement:  Begin with a general statement about the topic and gradually narrow it down to your specific focus. For example, when discussing the impact of social media, you can begin by making a broad statement about social media and its widespread use in today’s society, as follows: “Social media has become an integral part of modern life, with billions of users worldwide.” 
• Define Key Terms : Define any key terms or concepts that may be unfamiliar to your readers but are essential for understanding your argument. 
• Provide Relevant Statistics:  Use statistics or facts to highlight the significance of the issue you’re discussing. For instance, “According to a report by Statista, the number of social media users is expected to reach 4.41 billion by 2025.” 
• Discuss the Evolution:  Mention previous research or studies that have been conducted on the topic, especially those that are relevant to your argument. Mention key milestones or developments that have shaped its current impact. You can also outline some of the major effects of social media. For example, you can briefly describe how social media has evolved, including positives such as increased connectivity and issues like cyberbullying and privacy concerns. 
• Transition to Your Thesis:  Use the background information to lead into your thesis statement, which should clearly state the main argument or purpose of your essay. For example, “Given its pervasive influence, it is crucial to examine the impact of social media on mental health.” 

A thesis statement is a concise summary of the main point or claim of an essay, research paper, or other type of academic writing. It appears near the end of the introduction. Here’s how to write a thesis statement: 

• Identify the topic:  Start by identifying the topic of your essay. For example, if your essay is about the importance of exercise for overall health, your topic is “exercise.” 
• State your position:  Next, state your position or claim about the topic. This is the main argument or point you want to make. For example, if you believe that regular exercise is crucial for maintaining good health, your position could be: “Regular exercise is essential for maintaining good health.” 
• Support your position:  Provide a brief overview of the reasons or evidence that support your position. These will be the main points of your essay. For example, if you’re writing an essay about the importance of exercise, you could mention the physical health benefits, mental health benefits, and the role of exercise in disease prevention. 
• Make it specific:  Ensure your thesis statement clearly states what you will discuss in your essay. For example, instead of saying, “Exercise is good for you,” you could say, “Regular exercise, including cardiovascular and strength training, can improve overall health and reduce the risk of chronic diseases.” 

Examples of essay introduction 

Here are examples of essay introductions for different types of essays: 

Argumentative Essay Introduction Example:  

Topic: Should the voting age be lowered to 16? 

“The question of whether the voting age should be lowered to 16 has sparked nationwide debate. While some argue that 16-year-olds lack the requisite maturity and knowledge to make informed decisions, others argue that doing so would imbue young people with agency and give them a voice in shaping their future.” 

Expository Essay Introduction Example  

Topic: The benefits of regular exercise 

“In today’s fast-paced world, the importance of regular exercise cannot be overstated. From improving physical health to boosting mental well-being, the benefits of exercise are numerous and far-reaching. This essay will examine the various advantages of regular exercise and provide tips on incorporating it into your daily routine.” 

Text: “To Kill a Mockingbird” by Harper Lee 

“Harper Lee’s novel, ‘To Kill a Mockingbird,’ is a timeless classic that explores themes of racism, injustice, and morality in the American South. Through the eyes of young Scout Finch, the reader is taken on a journey that challenges societal norms and forces characters to confront their prejudices. This essay will analyze the novel’s use of symbolism, character development, and narrative structure to uncover its deeper meaning and relevance to contemporary society.” 

• Engaging and Relevant First Sentence : The opening sentence captures the reader’s attention and relates directly to the topic. 
• Background Information : Enough background information is introduced to provide context for the thesis statement. 
• Definition of Important Terms : Key terms or concepts that might be unfamiliar to the audience or are central to the argument are defined. 
• Clear Thesis Statement : The thesis statement presents the main point or argument of the essay. 
• Relevance to Main Body : Everything in the introduction directly relates to and sets up the discussion in the main body of the essay. 

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Writing a strong introduction is crucial for setting the tone and context of your essay. Here are the key takeaways for how to write essay introduction: 3  

• Hook the Reader : Start with an engaging hook to grab the reader’s attention. This could be a compelling question, a surprising fact, a relevant quote, or an anecdote. 
• Provide Background : Give a brief overview of the topic, setting the context and stage for the discussion. 
• Thesis Statement : State your thesis, which is the main argument or point of your essay. It should be concise, clear, and specific. 
• Preview the Structure : Outline the main points or arguments to help the reader understand the organization of your essay. 
• Keep it Concise : Avoid including unnecessary details or information not directly related to your thesis. 
• Revise and Edit : Revise your introduction to ensure clarity, coherence, and relevance. Check for grammar and spelling errors. 
• Seek Feedback : Get feedback from peers or instructors to improve your introduction further. 

The purpose of an essay introduction is to give an overview of the topic, context, and main ideas of the essay. It is meant to engage the reader, establish the tone for the rest of the essay, and introduce the thesis statement or central argument.  

An essay introduction typically ranges from 5-10% of the total word count. For example, in a 1,000-word essay, the introduction would be roughly 50-100 words. However, the length can vary depending on the complexity of the topic and the overall length of the essay.

An essay introduction is critical in engaging the reader and providing contextual information about the topic. To ensure its effectiveness, consider incorporating these key elements: a compelling hook, background information, a clear thesis statement, an outline of the essay’s scope, a smooth transition to the body, and optional signposting sentences.  

The process of writing an essay introduction is not necessarily straightforward, but there are several strategies that can be employed to achieve this end. When experiencing difficulty initiating the process, consider the following techniques: begin with an anecdote, a quotation, an image, a question, or a startling fact to pique the reader’s interest. It may also be helpful to consider the five W’s of journalism: who, what, when, where, why, and how.   For instance, an anecdotal opening could be structured as follows: “As I ascended the stage, momentarily blinded by the intense lights, I could sense the weight of a hundred eyes upon me, anticipating my next move. The topic of discussion was climate change, a subject I was passionate about, and it was my first public speaking event. Little did I know , that pivotal moment would not only alter my perspective but also chart my life’s course.” 

Crafting a compelling thesis statement for your introduction paragraph is crucial to grab your reader’s attention. To achieve this, avoid using overused phrases such as “In this paper, I will write about” or “I will focus on” as they lack originality. Instead, strive to engage your reader by substantiating your stance or proposition with a “so what” clause. While writing your thesis statement, aim to be precise, succinct, and clear in conveying your main argument.  

To create an effective essay introduction, ensure it is clear, engaging, relevant, and contains a concise thesis statement. It should transition smoothly into the essay and be long enough to cover necessary points but not become overwhelming. Seek feedback from peers or instructors to assess its effectiveness. 

References  

• Cui, L. (2022). Unit 6 Essay Introduction.  Building Academic Writing Skills . 
• West, H., Malcolm, G., Keywood, S., & Hill, J. (2019). Writing a successful essay.  Journal of Geography in Higher Education ,  43 (4), 609-617. 
• Beavers, M. E., Thoune, D. L., & McBeth, M. (2023). Bibliographic Essay: Reading, Researching, Teaching, and Writing with Hooks: A Queer Literacy Sponsorship. College English, 85(3), 230-242. 

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Writing Help

Admission essays by, writing the essay: the first sentence.

For an introduction to writing the first sentence of an essay, see "The First Sentence" under Academic Essays . For an introduction to the different kinds of paths your essay might follow, see "Take Your Reader on a Trip" on the same page.

The first draft of your first sentence should be just enough to get you started as you begin to write. Later, after you have a good command of your topic and have a good sense of the overall tone of your essay--this may not be until after you have written several drafts--you can spend time focusing on the first sentence. This point in your writing is a good time to go back to sample essays to see what they accomplish in the first sentence. Does one of them provide a model for a sentence that would work well in your essay?

If you are having trouble structuring your essay, one good strategy is to look through everything you have written for the one best or most moving line. Try putting that sentence at the start and forming the rest of the essay around that primary idea. Note that this line might be the last point chronologically in your narrative--putting it first would give the whole essay an interesting "flashback" structure.

Here are some sample openings that might fit your essay.

1. Dialogue . Dialogue usually gets a reader's attention. This is because dialogue gives a sense of present action. Even one sentence in quotation marks can be enough. Example: "'I don't know where you get those ideas!' my mother said. I was drawing and explaining my latest, perhaps my craziest, back-of-the-placemat 'invention'..." This opening shows that the writer is thoughtful yet aware of the limitations of his ideas, friendly with his mom, and perhaps just the kind of person who can learn to focus his ideas with a good college education.

2. A short, striking sentence . Readers often appreciate writers who can pack a punch and then mellow out. You can be dramatic without being melodramatic. Example: "I held my gun firmly. The paintball field was covered in blue, yellow, and red splotches..."

3. A leisurely introduction . If the essay isn't action-packed but instead paints a beautiful picture for the reader, let the opening suggest a pleasant experience. Example: "Rowing out to the island on Lake Bled, dwarfed by the Slovenian Alps to the north and by an ancient castle high on the eastern hill, I was enjoying the best day of my summer vacation." Take the reader with you through this wonderful experience, using extra phrases and clauses beyond the simple subject and verb of the sentence.

4. A challenge . You can draw the reader into your argument if you advertise that you have learned something that goes against common knowledge. Perhaps you figured out that cats actually love to be petted the "wrong" way, back to front. Example: "Although my parents had warned me never to pet a cat from back to front, I recently discovered that Stitches can't get enough of my 'backward' attentions." This sentence suggests that the writer is willing to challenge cultural norms, which a lot of colleges want to see their students learn to do. Note that this kind of opening frequently starts out with the common knowledge but adds a challenging word such as although, but, while, or even though somewhere in the first clause, and then suggests the content of the challenge in the second clause.

5. A warning . A reader will pay attention when there is something to be concerned about. Examples: "I wish someone had told me two years ago that sometimes a pool of water on the road is really a mirage!" "When I worked for Representative Smith's political campaign last summer, I learned that pollution from factories in our state is far less of a danger to public health than runoff from farms." The second example shows that the writer knows something that readers should be aware of, that the writer did some interesting work, and that the writer learned something valuable from the experience.

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How to Start a College Essay Perfectly

College Essays

If you've been sitting in front of a blank screen, unsure of exactly how to start a personal statement for college, then believe me—I feel your pain. A great college essay introduction is key to making your essay stand out, so there's a lot of pressure to get it right.

Luckily, being able to craft the perfect beginning for your admissions essay is just like many other writing skills— something you can get better at with practice and by learning from examples.

In this article, I'll walk you through exactly how to start a college essay. We'll cover what makes a great personal statement introduction and how the first part of your essay should be structured. We'll also look at several great examples of essay beginnings and explain why they work, how they work, and what you can learn from them.

What Is the College Essay Introduction For?

Before we talk about how to start a college essay, let's discuss the role of the introduction. Just as your college essay is your chance to introduce yourself to the admissions office of your target college, your essay's beginning is your chance to introduce your writing.

Wait, Back Up—Why Do Colleges Want Personal Statements?

In general, college essays make it easier to get to know the parts of you not in your transcript —these include your personality, outlook on life, passions, and experiences.

You're not writing for yourself but for a very specific kind of reader. Picture it: your audience is an admissions officer who has read thousands and thousands of essays. This person is disposed to be friendly and curious, but if she hasn't already seen it all she's probably seen a good portion of it.

Your essay's job is to entertain and impress this person, and to make you memorable so you don't merely blend into the sea of other personal statements. Like all attempts at charm, you must be slightly bold and out of the ordinary—but you must also stay away from crossing the line into offensiveness or bad taste.

What Role Does the Introduction Play in a College Essay?

The personal statement introduction is basically the wriggly worm that baits the hook to catch your reader. It's vital to grab attention from the get-go—the more awake and eager your audience is, the more likely it is that what you say will really land.

How do you go about crafting an introduction that successfully hooks your reader? Let's talk about how to structure the beginning of your college essay.

How to Structure a Personal Statement Introduction

To see how the introduction fits into an essay, let's look at the big structural picture first and then zoom in.

College Essay Structure Overview

Even though they're called essays, personal statements are really more like a mix of a short story and a philosophy or psychology class that's all about you.

Usually, how this translates is that you start with a really good (and very short) story about something arresting, unusual, or important that happened to you. This is not to say that the story has to be about something important or unusual in the grand scheme of things—it just has to be a moment that stands out to you as defining in some way, or an explanation of why you are the way you are . You then pivot to an explanation of why this story is an accurate illustration of one of your core qualities, values, or beliefs.

The story typically comes in the first half of the essay, and the insightful explanation comes second —but, of course, all rules were made to be broken, and some great essays flip this more traditional order.

College Essay Introduction Components

Now, let's zero in on the first part of the college essay. What are the ingredients of a great personal statement introduction? I'll list them here and then dissect them one by one in the next section:

• A killer first sentence: This hook grabs your readers' attention and whets their appetite for your story.
• A vivid, detailed story that illustrates your eventual insight: To make up for how short your story will be, you must insert effective sensory information to immerse the reader.
• An insightful pivot toward the greater point you're making in your essay: This vital piece of the essay connects the short story part to the part where you explain what the experience has taught you about yourself, how you've matured, and how it has ultimately shaped you as a person.

How to Write a College Essay Introduction

Here's a weird secret that's true for most written work: just because it'll end up at the beginning doesn't mean you have to write it first. For example, in this case, you can't know what your killer first sentence will be until you've figured out the following details:

• The story you want to tell
• The point you want that story to make
• The trait/maturity level/background about you that your essay will reveal

So my suggestion is to work in reverse order! Writing your essay will be much easier if you can figure out the entirety of it first and then go back and work out exactly how it should start.

This means that before you can craft your ideal first sentence, the way the short story experience of your life will play out on the page, and the perfect pivoting moment that transitions from your story to your insight, you must work out a general idea about which life event you will share and what you expect that life event to demonstrate to the reader about you and the kind of person you are.

If you're having trouble coming up with a topic, check out our guide on brainstorming college essay ideas . It might also be helpful to read our guides to specific application essays, such as picking your best Common App prompt and writing a perfect University of California personal statement .

In the next sections of this article, I'll talk about how to work backwards on the introduction, moving from bigger to smaller elements: starting with the first section of the essay in general and then honing your pivot sentence and your first sentence.

How to Write the First Section of Your College Essay

In a 500-word essay, this section will take up about the first half of the essay and will mostly consist of a brief story that illuminates a key experience, an important character trait, a moment of transition or transformation, or a step toward maturity.

Once you've figured out your topic and zeroed in on the experience you want to highlight in the beginning of your essay, here are 2 great approaches to making it into a story:

• Talking it out, storyteller style (while recording yourself): Imagine that you're sitting with a group of people at a campfire, or that you're stuck on a long flight sitting next to someone you want to befriend. Now tell that story. What does someone who doesn't know you need to know in order for the story to make sense? What details do you need to provide to put them in the story with you? What background information do they need in order to understand the stakes or importance of the story?
• Record yourself telling your story to friends and then chatting about it: What do they need clarified? What questions do they have? Which parts of your story didn't make sense or follow logically for them? Do they want to know more, or less? Is part of your story interesting to them but not interesting to you? Is a piece of your story secretly boring, even though you think it's interesting?

Later, as you listen to the recorded story to try to get a sense of how to write it, you can also get a sense of the tone with which you want to tell your story. Are you being funny as you talk? Sad? Trying to shock, surprise, or astound your audience? The way you most naturally tell your story is the way you should write it.

After you've done this storyteller exercise, write down the salient points of what you learned. What is the story your essay will tell? What is the point about your life, point of view, or personality it will make? What tone will you tell it with? Sketch out a detailed outline so that you can start filling in the pieces as we work through how to write the introductory sections.

How to Write the First Sentence of Your College Essay

In general, your essay's first sentence should be either a mini-cliffhanger that sets up a situation the reader would like to see resolved, or really lush scene-setting that situates your audience in a place and time they can readily visualize. The former builds expectations and evokes curiosity, and the latter stimulates the imagination and creates a connection with the author. In both cases, you hit your goal of greater reader engagement.

Now, I'm going to show you how these principles work for all types of first sentences, whether in college essays or in famous works of fiction.

First Sentence Idea 1: Line of Quoted Direct Speech

"Mum, I'm gay." ( Ahmad Ashraf '17 for Connecticut College )

The experience of coming out is raw and emotional, and the issue of LGBTQ rights is an important facet of modern life. This three-word sentence immediately sums up an enormous background of the personal and political.

"You can handle it, Matt," said Mr. Wolf, my fourth-grade band teacher, as he lifted the heavy tuba and put it into my arms. ( Matt Coppo '07 for Hamilton College )

This sentence conjures up a funny image—we can immediately picture the larger adult standing next to a little kid holding a giant tuba. It also does a little play on words: "handle it" can refer to both the literal tuba Matt is being asked to hold and the figurative stress of playing the instrument.

First Sentence Idea 2: Punchy Short Sentence With One Grabby Detail

I live alone—I always have since elementary school. ( Kevin Zevallos '16 for Connecticut College )

This opener definitely makes us want to know more. Why was he alone? Where were the protective grown-ups who surround most kids? How on earth could a little kid of 8-10 years old survive on his own?

I have old hands. ( First line from a student in Stanford's class of 2012 )

There's nothing but questions here. What are "old" hands? Are they old-looking? Arthritic? How has having these hands affected the author?

There was no possibility of taking a walk that day. (Charlotte Bronte, Jane Eyre )

There's immediately a feeling of disappointment and the stifled desire for action here. Who wanted to go for a walk? And why was this person being prevented from going?

First Sentence Idea 3: Lyrical, Adjective-Rich Description of a Setting

We met for lunch at El Burrito Mexicano, a tiny Mexican lunch counter under the Red Line "El" tracks. ( Ted Mullin '06 for Carleton College )

Look at how much specificity this sentence packs in less than 20 words. Each noun and adjective is chosen for its ability to convey yet another detail. "Tiny" instead of "small" gives readers a sense of being uncomfortably close to other people and sitting at tables that don't quite have enough room for the plates. "Counter" instead of "restaurant" lets us immediately picture this work surface, the server standing behind it, and the general atmosphere. "Under the tracks" is a location deeply associated with being run down, borderline seedy, and maybe even dangerous.

Maybe it's because I live in Rhinelander, Wisconsin, where Brett Favre draws more of a crowd on Sunday than any religious service, cheese is a staple food, it's sub-zero during global warming, current "fashions" come three years after they've hit it big with the rest of the world, and where all children by the age of ten can use a 12-gauge like it's their job. ( Riley Smith '12 for Hamilton College )

This sentence manages to hit every stereotype about Wisconsin held by outsiders—football, cheese, polar winters, backwardness, and guns—and this piling on gives us a good sense of place while also creating enough hyperbole to be funny. At the same time, the sentence raises the tantalizing question: maybe what is because of Wisconsin?

High, high above the North Pole, on the first day of 1969, two professors of English Literature approached each other at a combined velocity of 1200 miles per hour. (David Lodge, Changing Places )

This sentence is structured in the highly specific style of a math problem, which makes it funny. However, at the heart of this sentence lies a mystery that grabs the reader's interest: why on earth would these two people be doing this?

First Sentence Idea 4: Counterintuitive Statement

To avoid falling into generalities with this one, make sure you're really creating an argument or debate with your counterintuitive sentence. If no one would argue with what you've said, then you aren't making an argument. ("The world is a wonderful place" and "Life is worth living" don't make the cut.)

If string theory is really true, then the entire world is made up of strings, and I cannot tie a single one. ( Joanna '18 for Johns Hopkins University )

There's a great switch here from the sub-microscopic strings that make up string theory to the actual physical strings you can tie in real life. This sentence hints that the rest of the essay will continue playing with linked, albeit not typically connected, concepts.

All children, except one, grow up. (J. M. Barrie, Peter Pan )

In just six words, this sentence upends everything we think we know about what happens to human beings.

First Sentence Idea 5: The End—Making the Rest of the Essay a Flashback

I've recently come to the realization that community service just isn't for me. ( Kyla '19 for Johns Hopkins University )

This seems pretty bold—aren't we supposed to be super into community service? Is this person about to declare herself to be totally selfish and uncaring about the less fortunate? We want to know the story that would lead someone to this kind of conclusion.

Many years later, as he faced the firing squad, Colonel Aureliano Buendía was to remember that distant afternoon when his father took him to discover ice. (Gabriel García Márquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude )

So many amazing details here. Why is the Colonel being executed? What does "discovering" ice entail? How does he go from ice-discoverer to military commander of some sort to someone condemned to capital punishment?

First Sentence Idea 6: Direct Question to the Reader

To work well, your question should be especially specific, come out of left field, or pose a surprising hypothetical.

How does an agnostic Jew living in the Diaspora connect to Israel? ( Essay #3 from Carleton College's sample essays )

This is a thorny opening, raising questions about the difference between being an ethnic Jew and practicing the religion of Judaism, and the obligations of Jews who live outside of Israel to those who live in Israel and vice versa. There's a lot of meat to this question, setting up a philosophically interesting, politically important, and personally meaningful essay.

While traveling through the daily path of life, have you ever stumbled upon a hidden pocket of the universe? ( First line from a student in Stanford's class of 2012 )

There's a dreamy and sci-fi element to this first sentence, as it tries to find the sublime ("the universe") inside the prosaic ("daily path of life").

First Sentence Idea 7: Lesson You Learned From the Story You're Telling

One way to think about how to do this kind of opening sentence well is to model it on the morals that ended each Aesop's fable . The lesson you learned should be slightly surprising (not necessarily intuitive) and something that someone else might disagree with.

Perhaps it wasn't wise to chew and swallow a handful of sand the day I was given my first sandbox, but it seemed like a good idea at the time. ( Meagan Spooner '07 for Hamilton College )

The best part of this hilarious sentence is that even in retrospect, eating a handful of sand is only possibly an unwise idea—a qualifier achieved through that great "perhaps." So does that mean it was wise in at least some way to eat the sand? The reader wants to know more.

All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. (Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina )

This immediately sets readers to mentally flip through every unhappy family they've ever known to double-check the narrator's assertion. Did he draw the right conclusion here? How did he come to this realization? The implication that he will tell us all about some dysfunctional drama also has a rubbernecking draw.

How to Write a Pivot Sentence in Your College Essay

This is the place in your essay where you go from small to big—from the life experience you describe in detail to the bigger point this experience illustrates about your world and yourself.

Typically, the pivot sentence will come at the end of your introductory section, about halfway through the essay. I say sentence, but this section could be more than one sentence (though ideally no longer than two or three).

So how do you make the turn? Usually you indicate in your pivot sentence itself that you are moving from one part of the essay to another. This is called signposting, and it's a great way to keep readers updated on where they are in the flow of the essay and your argument.

Here are three ways to do this, with real-life examples from college essays published by colleges.

Pivot Idea 1: Expand the Time Frame

In this pivot, you gesture out from the specific experience you describe to the overarching realization you had during it. Think of helper phrases such as "that was the moment I realized" and "never again would I."

Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation. ( Stephen '19 for Johns Hopkins University )

This is a pretty great pivot, neatly connecting the story Stephen's been telling (about having to break into a car on a volunteering trip) and his general reliance on his own resourcefulness and ability to roll with whatever life throws at him. It's a double bonus that he accomplishes the pivot with a play on the word "click," which here means both the literal clicking of the car door latch and the figurative clicking his brain does. Note also how the pivot crystallizes the moment of epiphany through the word "suddenly," which implies instant insight.

But in that moment I realized that the self-deprecating jokes were there for a reason. When attempting to climb the mountain of comedic success, I didn't just fall and then continue on my journey, but I fell so many times that I befriended the ground and realized that the middle of the metaphorical mountain made for a better campsite. Not because I had let my failures get the best of me, but because I had learned to make the best of my failures. (Rachel Schwartzbaum '19 for Connecticut College)

This pivot similarly focuses on a "that moment" of illuminated clarity. In this case, it broadens Rachel's experience of stage fright before her standup comedy sets to the way she has more generally not allowed failures to stop her progress—and has instead been able to use them as learning experiences. Not only does she describe her humor as "self-deprecating," but she also demonstrates what she means with that great "befriended the ground" line.

It was on this first educational assignment that I realized how much could be accomplished through an animal education program—more, in some cases, than the aggregate efforts of all of the rehabilitators. I found that I had been naive in my assumption that most people knew as much about wildlife as I did, and that they shared my respect for animals. ( J.P. Maloney '07 for Hamilton College )

This is another classically constructed pivot, as J.P. segues from his negative expectations about using a rehabilitated wild owl as an educational animal to his understanding of how much this kind of education could contribute to forming future environmentalists and nature lovers. The widening of scope happens at once as we go from a highly specific "first educational assignment" to the more general realization that "much" could be accomplished through these kinds of programs.

Pivot Idea 2: Link the Described Experience With Others

In this pivot, you draw a parallel between the life event that you've been describing in your very short story and other events that were similar in some significant way. Helpful phrases include "now I see how x is really just one of the many x 's I have faced," "in a way, x is a good example of the x -like situations I see daily," and "and from then on every time I ..."

This state of discovery is something I strive for on a daily basis. My goal is to make all the ideas in my mind fit together like the gears of a Swiss watch. Whether it's learning a new concept in linear algebra, talking to someone about a programming problem, or simply zoning out while I read, there is always some part of my day that pushes me towards this place of cohesion: an idea that binds together some set of the unsolved mysteries in my mind. ( Aubrey Anderson '19 for Tufts University )

After cataloging and detailing the many interesting thoughts that flow through her brain in a specific hour, Aubrey uses the pivot to explain that this is what every waking hour is like for her "on a daily basis." She loves learning different things and finds a variety of fields fascinating. And her pivot lets us know that her example is a demonstration of how her mind works generally.

This was the first time I've been to New Mexico since he died. Our return brought so much back for me. I remembered all the times we'd visited when I was younger, certain events highlighted by the things we did: Dad haggling with the jewelry sellers, his minute examination of pots at a trading post, the affection he had for chilies. I was scared that my love for the place would be tainted by his death, diminished without him there as my guide. That fear was part of what kept my mother and me away for so long. Once there, though, I was relieved to realize that Albuquerque still brings me closer to my father. ( Essay #1 from Carleton College's sample essays )

In this pivot, one very painful experience of visiting a place filled with sorrowful memories is used as a way to think about "all the other times" the author had been to New Mexico. The previously described trip after the father's death pivots into a sense of the continuity of memory. Even though he is no longer there to "guide," the author's love for the place itself remains.

Pivot Idea 3: Extract and Underline a Trait or Value

In this type of pivot, you use the experience you've described to demonstrate its importance in developing or zooming in on one key attribute. Here are some ways to think about making this transition: "I could not have done it without characteristic y , which has helped me through many other difficult moments," or "this is how I came to appreciate the importance of value z, both in myself and in those around me."

My true reward of having Stanley is that he opened the door to the world of botany. I would never have invested so much time learning about the molecular structure or chemical balance of plants if not for taking care of him. ( Michaela '19 for Johns Hopkins University )

In this tongue-in-cheek essay in which Michaela writes about Stanley, a beloved cactus, as if "he" has human qualities and is her child, the pivot explains what makes this plant so meaningful to its owner. Without having to "take care of him," Michaela "would never have invested so much time learning" about plant biology. She has a deep affinity for the natural sciences and attributes her interest at least partly to her cactus.

By leaving me free to make mistakes and chase wild dreams, my father was always able to help ground me back in reality. Personal responsibilities, priorities and commitments are all values that are etched into my mind, just as they are within my father's. ( Olivia Rabbitt '16 for Connecticut College )

In Olivia's essay about her father's role in her life, the pivot discusses his importance by explaining his deep impact on her values. Olivia has spent the story part of her essay describing her father's background and their relationship. Now, she is free to show how without his influence, she would not be so strongly committed to "personal responsibilities, priorities and commitments."

College Essay Introduction Examples

We've collected many examples of college essays published by colleges and offered a breakdown of how several of them are put together . Now, let's check out a couple of examples of actual college essay beginnings to show you how and why they work.

Sample Intro 1

A blue seventh place athletic ribbon hangs from my mantel. Every day, as I walk into my living room, the award mockingly congratulates me as I smile. Ironically, the blue seventh place ribbon resembles the first place ribbon in color; so, if I just cover up the tip of the seven, I may convince myself that I championed the fourth heat. But, I never dare to wipe away the memory of my seventh place swim; I need that daily reminder of my imperfection. I need that seventh place.

Two years ago, I joined the no-cut swim team. That winter, my coach unexpectedly assigned me to swim the 500 freestyle. After stressing for hours about swimming 20 laps in a competition, I mounted the blocks, took my mark, and swam. Around lap 14, I looked around at the other lanes and did not see anyone. "I must be winning!" I thought to myself. However, as I finally completed my race and lifted my arms up in victory to the eager applause of the fans, I looked up at the score board. I had finished my race in last place. In fact, I left the pool two minutes after the second-to-last competitor, who now stood with her friends, wearing all her clothes.

(From "The Unathletic Department" by Meghan '17 for Johns Hopkins University )

Why Intro Sample 1 Works

Here are some of the main reasons that this essay's introduction is super effective.

#1: It's Got a Great First Sentence

The sentence is short but still does some scene setting with the descriptive "blue" and the location "from my mantel." It introduces a funny element with "seventh place"—why would that bad of a showing even get a ribbon? It dangles information just out of reach, making the reader want to know more: what was this an award for? Why does this definitively non-winning ribbon hang in such a prominent place of pride?

#2: It Has Lots of Detail

In the intro, we get physical actions: "cover up the tip," "mounted the blocks," "looked around at the other lanes," "lifted my arms up," and "stood with her friends, wearing all her clothes." We also get words conveying emotion: "mockingly congratulates me as I smile," "unexpectedly assigned," and "stressing for hours." Finally, we get descriptive specificity in the precise word choice: "from my mantel" and "my living room" instead of simply "in my house," and "lap 14" instead of "toward the end of the race."

#3: It Explains the Stakes

Even though everyone can imagine the lap pool, not everyone knows exactly what the "500 freestyle" race is. Meghan elegantly explains the difficulty by describing herself freaking out over "swimming 20 laps in a competition," which helps us to picture the swimmer going back and forth many times.

#4: It Has Great Storytelling

We basically get a sports commentary play-by-play here. Even though we already know the conclusion—Meghan came in 7th—she still builds suspense by narrating the race from her point of view as she was swimming it. She's nervous for a while, and then she starts the race.

Close to the end, she starts to think everything is going well ("I looked around at the other lanes and did not see anyone. 'I must be winning!' I thought to myself."). Everything builds to an expected moment of great triumph ("I finally completed my race and lifted my arms up in victory to the eager applause of the fans") but ends in total defeat ("I had finished my race in last place").

Not only that, but the mildly clichéd sports hype is hilariously undercut by reality ("I left the pool two minutes after the second-to-last competitor, who now stood with her friends, wearing all her clothes").

#5: It Uses a Pivot Sentence

This essay uses the time expansion method of pivoting: "But, I never dare to wipe away the memory of my seventh place swim; I need that daily reminder of my imperfection. I need that seventh place." Coming last in the race was something that happened once, but the award is now an everyday experience of humility.

The rest of the essay explores what it means for Meghan to constantly see this reminder of failure and to transform it into a sense of acceptance of her imperfections. Notice also that in this essay, the pivot comes before the main story, helping us "hear" the narrative in the way she wants us to.

Sample Intro 2

"Biogeochemical. It's a word, I promise!" There are shrieks and shouts in protest and support. Unacceptable insults are thrown, degrees and qualifications are questioned, I think even a piece of my grandmother's famously flakey parantha whizzes past my ear. Everyone is too lazy to take out a dictionary (or even their phones) to look it up, so we just hash it out. And then, I am crowned the victor, a true success in the Merchant household. But it is fleeting, as the small, glossy, plastic tiles, perfectly connected to form my winning word, are snatched out from under me and thrown in a pile with all the disgraced, "unwinning" tiles as we mix for our next game of Bananagrams. It's a similar donnybrook, this time ending with my father arguing that it is okay to use "Rambo" as a word (it totally is not).

Words and communicating have always been of tremendous importance in my life: from silly games like Bananagrams and our road-trip favorite "word game," to stunted communication between opposing grandparents, each speaking a different Indian language; from trying to understand the cheesemonger behind the counter with a deep southern drawl (I just want some Camembert!), to shaping a script to make people laugh.

Words are moving and changing; they have influence and substance.

From an Essay by Shaan Merchant ‘19 for Tufts University

Why Intro Sample 2 Works

Let's take a look at what qualities make this essay's introduction particularly memorable.

With the first sentence, we are immediately thrust into the middle of the action —into an exciting part of an argument about whether "biogeochemical" is really a word. We're also immediately challenged. Is this a word? Have I ever heard it before? Does a scientific neologism count as a word?

#2: It Shows Rather Than Tells

Since the whole essay is going to be about words, it makes sense for Shaan to demonstrate his comfort with all different kinds of language:

• Complex, elevated vocabulary, such as "biogeochemical" and "donnybrook"
• Foreign words, such as "parantha" and "Camembert"
• Colorful descriptive words, such as "shrieks and shouts," "famously flakey, "whizzes past," and "hash it out"
• "Fake" words, such as "unwinning" and "Rambo"

What's great is that Shaan is able to seamlessly mix the different tones and registers these words imply, going from cerebral to funny and back again.

#3: It Uses a Pivot Sentence

This essay uses the value-extraction style of pivot: "Words and communicating have always been of tremendous importance in my life." After we see an experience linking Shaan's clear love of his family with an interest in word games, he clarifies that this is exactly what the essay will be about—using a very straightforward pivoting sentence.

#4: It Piles On Examples to Avoid Vagueness

The danger of this kind of pivot sentence is slipping into vague, uninformative statements, such as "I love words." To avoid making a generalization the tells us nothing, the essay builds a list of examples of times when Shaan saw the way that words connect people: games ("Bananagrams and our road-trip favorite ‘word game,'"), his mixed-language family ("grandparents, each speaking a different Indian language"), encounters with strangers ("from trying to understand the cheesemonger"), and finally the more active experience of performing ("shaping a script to make people laugh").

But the essay stops short of giving so many examples that the reader drowns. I'd say three to five examples is a good range—as long as they're all different kinds of the same thing.

The Bottom Line: How to Start a College Essay

The college essay introduction should hook your reader and make her want to know more and read more.

Good personal statement introductions will contain the following features:

• A killer first line
• A detailed description of an experience from your life
• A pivot to the bigger picture, in which you explain why and how this experience has shaped you, your point of view, and/or your values.

You don't have to write the introduction first, and you certainly don't have to write your first sentence first . Instead, start by developing your story by telling it out loud to a friend. You can then work on your first sentence and your pivot.

The first sentence should either be short, punchy, and carry some ambiguity or questions, or be a detailed and beautiful description setting an easily pictured scene. The pivot, on the other hand, should answer the question, "How does the story you've told connect to a larger truth or insight about you?"

What's Next?

Wondering what to make of the Common Application essay prompts? We have the complete list of this year's Common App prompts with explanations of what each is asking as well as a guide to picking the Common App prompt that's perfect for you .

Thinking of applying to the University of California system? Check out our detailed guide on how to approach their essay prompts and craft your ideal UC essay .

If you're in the middle of the essay-writing process, you'll want to see our suggestions on what essay pitfalls to avoid .

Working on the rest of your college application? Read what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying .

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Sentence Starters: Ultimate List to Improve Your Essays and Writing

By Ashley Shaw

This blog post is going to be about … No. Too boring.

Today, I am going to talk to you about ... No. Too specific.

This is a blog post for all writers ... Nope. Too generic.

Has this ever been you while writing? I get it. Writing a good sentence can be hard, and when you have to string a whole lot of them together, the task can become daunting. So what do you do?

From the first sentence you write to the very last, you want each one to show your style and motivate your reader to keep reading. In this post, we are going to think about how you start your sentences.

What Is a Good Sentence Starter for an Essay Introduction?

What is a good sentence starter for a body paragraph, 25 useful transitions, can i repeat a sentence starter, how can i rephrase "in conclusion".

The first paragraph of a paper can make or break your grade. It is what gets your audience into the topic and sets the whole stage. Because of this, it is important to get your readers hooked early.

The first sentence of a paper is often called the hook. It shouldn’t be anything ordinary. It should have strong language and be a little surprising, with an interesting fact, story, statistic, or quote on the topic.

Because it is designed to pull the reader in and surprise them a little, it is often good to avoid pre-written sentence starter examples when writing your hook. Just get into it here, and worry about the flow later.

Here are some examples:

Spider webs were once used as bandages.

I taught myself to read when I was three. At least, that’s the story my parents tell.

Recent studies suggest that the average person lies at least once in every conversation.

“The world is bleeding and humans wield the knife,” or so says environmental scientist So Andso.

(P.S. Except for example 1, which is true, I just made all of these up to demonstrate my point. So, please don’t quote me on these!)

Once you jump right in with your hook, it is time to start working on ways to move sentences along. Here is where you may need some sentence starter examples.

In your first paragraph, you basically want to connect your hook to your thesis. You’ll do this with a few sentences setting up the stage for your topic and the claim you will make about it. To do that, follow the tips found in the next section on body paragraphs and general sentence starter tips.

Many of the tips I am about to discuss can be used anywhere in a paper, but they are especially helpful when writing body paragraphs.

Let’s start with one of the most important types of sentence starter in essay writing: transition words.

How Do I Use Transitions in an Essay?

If you want to start writing terrific sentences (and improve your essay structure ), the first thing you should do is start using transition words.

Transition words are those words or phrases that help connect thoughts and ideas. They move one sentence or paragraph into another, and they make things feel less abrupt.

The good thing about transition words is that you probably know a lot of them already and currently use them in your speech. Now, you just need to transition them into your writing. (See what I did there?)

Before we get into examples of what a good transition word is, let’s look at a paragraph without any transitions:

I went to the store. I bought bacon and eggs. I saw someone I knew. I said hello. I went to the cashier. They checked me out. I paid. I got my groceries. I went to my car. I returned home.

Yikes! That is some boring writing. It was painful to write, and I am sure it is even worse to read. There are two reasons for this:

• I start every sentence with the same word (more on this later)
• There are no signposts showing me how the ideas in the paragraph connect.

In an essay, you need to show how each of your ideas relate to each other to build your argument. If you just make a series of statements one after the other, you’re not showing your instructor that you actually understand those statements, or your topic.

How do we fix this? Transition words. Roughly 25% of your sentences should start with a transition word. If you can hit that number in your essay, you’ll know that you’ve made meaningful steps towards demonstrating your understanding.

Of course, hitting that number isn’t enough—those transitions need to be meaningful. Let’s look at the different types of transitions and how you can use them.

What Are Words Like First , Next , and Last Called?

You probably already use some transitions in your essays. For example, if you start a paragraph with firstly , you’ve used a transition word. But transitions can do so much more!

Here are 25 common transitional words and phrases that you could use in your essay:

• Additionally / In Addition
• Alternatively / Conversely
• As a result of
• At this time
• Consequently
• Contrary to
• First(ly), Second(ly), etc.
• In contrast
• Nonetheless
• On the other hand
• Particularly / In particular
• In other words

This list isn’t exhaustive, but it is a good start.

These words show different types of relationships between ideas. These relationships fall into four main categories: Emphasis , Contrast , Addition , and Order .

What Are Emphasis Transition Words?

These phrases are used when you want to highlight a point. Examples from my above list include clearly , particularly , and indeed . Want to see some more? Follow my bolded transitions: Undoubtedly , you understand now. It should be noted that you don’t need to worry.

How Do You Use Addition Transitions?

These words add on to what you just said. These are words like along with , moreover , and also . Here are some more: Not only are you going to be great at transitions after this, but you will also be good at writing sentences. Furthermore , everyone is excited to see what you have to say.

How Can I Use Transitions to Contrast Ideas?

This is the opposite of addition, and you use it when you want to show an alternative view or to compare things. Examples from my list include words like nonetheless , contrary to , and besides .

Here are some more: Unlike people who haven’t read this article, you are going to be really prepared to write great sentences. Even so , there is still a lot more about writing to learn.

How Do I Order Ideas in My Essay?

A good first step is using order transition words.

This set of transitions helps mark the passage of time or gives an order to events. From the list, think of things like first and finally . Now for some extras: At this time yesterday , you were worried about starting sentences. Following this , though, you will be an expert.

Now that you get the concept of transitions, let’s go back to that poorly written paragraph above and add some in to see what happens:

This morning , I went to the store. While I was there, I bought bacon and eggs. Then I saw someone I knew. So I said hello. After that , I went to the cashier. At that time , they checked me out. First , I paid. Next , I got my groceries. Following that , I went to my car. Finally , I returned home.

(Notice the use of commas after most of these transitions!)

This isn’t the best paragraph I’ve ever written. It still needs a lot of work. However, notice what a difference just adding transitions makes. This is something simple but effective you can start doing to make your sentences better today.

If you want to check your transition usage, try ProWritingAid’s Transitions report . You’ll see how many of each type of transition word you've used so you can pin-point where you might be losing your reader.

Sign up for a free ProWritingAid account to try it out.

What Are Some Linking Phrases I Can Use in My Essay?

As well as individual words, you can also use short phrases at the beginning of your sentences to transition between ideas. I just did it there— "As well as individual words" shows you how this section of the article is related to the last.

Here are some more phrases like this:

As shown in the example,

As a result of this,

After the meeting,

While this may be true,

Though researchers suggest X,

Before the war began,

Until we answer this question,

Since we cannot assume this to be true,

While some may claim Y,

Because we know that Z is true,

These short phrases are called dependent clauses . See how they all end with a comma? That's because they need you to add more information to make them into complete sentences.

• While some may claim that chocolate is bad for you, data from a recent study suggests that it may have untapped health benefits .
• Since we cannot assume that test conditions were consistent, it is impossible to reach a solid conclusion via this experiment .
• As a result of this, critics disagree as to the symbolism of the yellow car in The Great Gatsby .

The bolded text in each example could stand on its own as a complete sentence. However, if we take away the first part of each sentence, we lose our connection to the other ideas in the essay.

These phrases are called dependent clauses : they depend on you adding another statement to the sentence to complete them. When you use a sentence starter phrase like the ones above in your writing, you signal that the new idea you have introduced completes (or disrupts) the idea before it.

Note: While some very short dependent clauses don’t need a comma, most do. Since it is not wrong to use one on even short ones (depending on the style guide being used), it is a good idea to include one every time.

Along with missing transitions and repeating sentence structure, another thing that stops sentences from being great is too much repetition. Keep your sentences sharp and poignant by mixing up word choices to start your sentences.

You might start your sentence with a great word, but then you use that same word 17 sentences in a row. After the first couple, your sentences don’t sound as great. So, whether it is varying the transitional phrases you use or just mixing up the sentence openers in general, putting in some variety will only improve your sentences.

ProWritingAid lets you know if you’ve used the same word repeatedly at the start of your sentences so you can change it.

The Repeats Report also shows you all of the repeats in your document. If you've used a sentence starter and then repeated it a couple of paragraphs down, the report will highlight it for you.

Try the Repeats Report with a free ProWritingAid account.

Now that you have your introduction sentences and body sentences taken care of, let’s talk a little about conclusion sentences. While you will still use transitions and clauses as in the body, there are some special considerations here.

Your conclusion is what people will remember most after they finish reading your paper. So, you want to make it stand out. Don’t just repeat yourself; tell them what they should do with what you just told them!

Use the tips from above, but also remember the following:

Be unique. Not only should you vary the words you use to start different sentences, but you should also think outside of the box. If you use the same conclusion sentence starter everyone else is using, your ideas will blend in too.

Be natural. Some of the best writing out there is writing that sounds natural. This goes for academic writing, too. While you won’t use phrases like "at the end of the day" in essay writing, stilted phrases like "in conclusion" can disrupt the flow you’ve created earlier on.

Here are some alternatives to "in conclusion" you could use in an essay:

• To review, ... (best for scientific papers where you need to restate your key points before making your final statement)
• As has been shown, ...
• In the final analysis, ...
• Taking everything into account, ...
• On the whole, ...
• Generally speaking, ...

If you’re looking for more ways to rephrase "in conclusion," take a look at our complete list of synonyms you can use.

There may not be a set word or words that you can use to make your sentences perfect. However, when you start using these tips, you’ll start to see noticeable improvement in your writing.

If you’ve ever heard people talk about pacing and flow in academic writing, and you have no idea what they mean or how to improve yours, then this is your answer. These tips will help your writing sound more natural, which is how you help your ideas flow.

Take your writing to the next level:

20 Editing Tips from Professional Writers

Whether you are writing a novel, essay, article, or email, good writing is an essential part of communicating your ideas., this guide contains the 20 most important writing tips and techniques from a wide range of professional writers..

Be confident about grammar

Check every email, essay, or story for grammar mistakes. Fix them before you press send.

Ashley Shaw

Ashley Shaw is a former editor and marketer/current PhD student and teacher. When she isn't studying con artists for her dissertation, she's thinking of new ways to help college students better understand and love the writing process.

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How to Start an Essay: 13 Engaging Strategies

ThoughtCo / Hugo Lin

• Ph.D., Rhetoric and English, University of Georgia
• M.A., Modern English and American Literature, University of Leicester
• B.A., English, State University of New York

There are countless ways to start an essay effectively. A solid introductory paragraph both informs and motivates. It lets readers know what your piece is about and it encourages them to keep reading.

For folks new to learning how to start an essay, here are 13 introductory strategies accompanied by examples from a wide range of professional writers.

State Your Thesis Briefly and Directly

One straightforward way to begin is to get right to the point. But avoid making your thesis a bald announcement, such as "This essay is about...". 

"It is time, at last, to speak the truth about Thanksgiving, and the truth is this. Thanksgiving is really not such a terrific holiday...." (Michael J. Arlen, "Ode to Thanksgiving." The Camera Age: Essays on Television . Penguin, 1982)

Pose a Question Related to Your Subject

A thought-provoking way to start an essay is by asking a relevant question that needs to be unpacked. Follow up the question with an answer, or an invitation for your readers to answer the question.

"What is the charm of necklaces? Why would anyone put something extra around their neck and then invest it with special significance? A necklace doesn't afford warmth in cold weather, like a scarf, or protection in combat, like chain mail; it only decorates. We might say, it borrows meaning from what it surrounds and sets off, the head with its supremely important material contents, and the face, that register of the soul. When photographers discuss the way in which a photograph reduces the reality it represents, they mention not only the passage from three dimensions to two, but also the selection of a point de vue that favors the top of the body rather than the bottom, and the front rather than the back. The face is the jewel in the crown of the body, and so we give it a setting." (Emily R. Grosholz, "On Necklaces." Prairie Schooner , Summer 2007)

State an Interesting Fact About Your Subject

Leading with a fact that draws readers in immediately can grab their attention effectively.

" The peregrine falcon was brought back from the brink of extinction by a ban on DDT, but also by a peregrine falcon mating hat invented by an ornithologist at Cornell University. If you cannot buy this, Google it. Female falcons had grown dangerously scarce. A few wistful males nevertheless maintained a sort of sexual loitering ground. The hat was imagined, constructed, and then forthrightly worn by the ornithologist as he patrolled this loitering ground, singing, Chee-up! Chee-up! and bowing like an overpolite Japanese Buddhist trying to tell somebody goodbye...." (David James Duncan, "Cherish This Ecstasy." The Sun , July 2008)

Present Your Thesis as a Recent Discovery or Revelation

"I've finally figured out the difference between neat people and sloppy people. The distinction is, as always, moral. Neat people are lazier and meaner than sloppy people." (Suzanne Britt Jordan, "Neat People vs. Sloppy People." Show and Tell . Morning Owl Press, 1983)

Briefly Describe the Primary Setting of Your Essay

"It was in Burma, a sodden morning of the rains. A sickly light, like yellow tinfoil, was slanting over the high walls into the jail yard. We were waiting outside the condemned cells, a row of sheds fronted with double bars, like small animal cages. Each cell measured about ten feet by ten and was quite bare within except for a plank bed and a pot of drinking water. In some of them brown silent men were squatting at the inner bars, with their blankets draped round them. These were the condemned men, due to be hanged within the next week or two." (George Orwell, "A Hanging," 1931)

Recount an Incident That Dramatizes Your Subject

Sharing an incident from your life or history in general is an impactful way to start an essay.

"One October afternoon three years ago while I was visiting my parents, my mother made a request I dreaded and longed to fulfill. She had just poured me a cup of Earl Grey from her Japanese iron teapot, shaped like a little pumpkin; outside, two cardinals splashed in the birdbath in the weak Connecticut sunlight. Her white hair was gathered at the nape of her neck, and her voice was low. “Please help me get Jeff’s pacemaker turned off,” she said, using my father’s first name. I nodded, and my heart knocked." (Katy Butler, "What Broke My Father's Heart." The New York Times Magazine , June 18, 2010)

Use the Narrative Strategy of Delay

The narrative strategy of delay allows you to put off identifying your subject just long enough to pique your readers' interest without frustrating them. 

"They woof. Though I have photographed them before, I have never heard them speak, for they are mostly silent birds. Lacking a syrinx, the avian equivalent of the human larynx, they are incapable of song. According to field guides the only sounds they make are grunts and hisses, though the Hawk Conservancy in the United Kingdom reports that adults may utter a croaking coo and that young black vultures, when annoyed, emit a kind of immature snarl...." (Lee Zacharias, "Buzzards." Southern Humanities Review , 2007)

Use the Historical Present Tense

An effective way to start an essay is to use historical present tense to relate an incident from the past as if it were happening now. 

"Ben and I are sitting side by side in the very back of his mother’s station wagon. We face glowing white headlights of cars following us, our sneakers pressed against the back hatch door. This is our joy—his and mine—to sit turned away from our moms and dads in this place that feels like a secret, as though they are not even in the car with us. They have just taken us out to dinner, and now we are driving home. Years from this evening, I won’t actually be sure that this boy sitting beside me is named Ben. But that doesn’t matter tonight. What I know for certain right now is that I love him, and I need to tell him this fact before we return to our separate houses, next door to each other. We are both five." (Ryan Van Meter, "First." The Gettysburg Review , Winter 2008)

Briefly Describe a Process That Leads Into Your Subject

"I like to take my time when I pronounce someone dead. The bare-minimum requirement is one minute with a stethoscope pressed to someone’s chest, listening for a sound that is not there; with my fingers bearing down on the side of someone’s neck, feeling for an absent pulse; with a flashlight beamed into someone’s fixed and dilated pupils, waiting for the constriction that will not come. If I’m in a hurry, I can do all of these in sixty seconds, but when I have the time, I like to take a minute with each task." (Jane Churchon, "The Dead Book." The Sun , February 2009)

Reveal a Secret or Make a Candid Observation

"I spy on my patients. Ought not a doctor to observe his patients by any means and from any stance, that he might the more fully assemble evidence? So I stand in doorways of hospital rooms and gaze. Oh, it is not all that furtive an act. Those in bed need only look up to discover me. But they never do." ( Richard Selzer , "The Discus Thrower." Confessions of a Knife . Simon & Schuster, 1979)

Open with a Riddle, Joke, or Humorous Quotation

A fun way to start an essay is to use a riddle , joke, or humorous quotation that reveals something about your subject. 

" Q: What did Eve say to Adam on being expelled from the Garden of Eden? A: 'I think we're in a time of transition.' The irony of this joke is not lost as we begin a new century and anxieties about social change seem rife. The implication of this message, covering the first of many periods of transition, is that change is normal; there is, in fact, no era or society in which change is not a permanent feature of the social landscape...." (Betty G. Farrell, Family: The Making of an Idea, an Institution, and a Controversy in American Culture . Westview Press, 1999)

Offer a Contrast Between Past and Present

"As a child, I was made to look out the window of a moving car and appreciate the beautiful scenery, with the result that now I don't care much for nature. I prefer parks, ones with radios going chuckawaka chuckawaka and the delicious whiff of bratwurst and cigarette smoke." (Garrison Keillor, "Walking Down The Canyon." Time , July 31, 2000)

Offer a Contrast Between Image and Reality

A compelling way to start an essay is with a contrast between a common misconception and the opposing truth. 

"They aren’t what most people think they are. Human eyes, touted as ethereal objects by poets and novelists throughout history, are nothing more than white spheres, somewhat larger than your average marble, covered by a leather-like tissue known as sclera and filled with nature’s facsimile of Jell-O. Your beloved’s eyes may pierce your heart, but in all likelihood they closely resemble the eyes of every other person on the planet. At least I hope they do, for otherwise he or she suffers from severe myopia (near-sightedness), hyperopia (far-sightedness), or worse...." (John Gamel, "The Elegant Eye." Alaska Quarterly Review , 2009)

• Examples of Great Introductory Paragraphs
• Write an Attention-Grabbing Opening Sentence for an Essay
• 100 Persuasive Essay Topics
• How to Write a Good Thesis Statement
• 501 Topic Suggestions for Writing Essays and Speeches
• The Ultimate Guide to the 5-Paragraph Essay
• Essay Assignment: Descriptive and Informative Profile
• Practice in Supporting a Topic Sentence with Specific Details
• How to Start a Book Report
• What Is Expository Writing?
• An Essay Revision Checklist
• Make Your Paragraphs Flow to Improve Writing
• 50 Argumentative Essay Topics
• How to Outline and Organize an Essay
• How to Write a Narrative Essay or Speech (With Topic Ideas)
• Writing an Opinion Essay

JournalBuddies.com

Journal Buddies Jill | July 8, 2024 October 25, 2023 | List of Prompts

40 Incredible Introduction Sentence Starters for Students

Introduction Sentence Starters That Will Grab Reader’s Attention Listed by Grade Level — Unlock your students’ potential with our wonderful list of Introduction Sentence Starters. This is a must-have resource for every classroom to help your writers conquer the blank page, one sentence at a time.

Tailored to each grade level, these prompts will spark creativity, enhance writing skills, and build confidence in young writers. Yeppers, these introduction story openers offer a starting point for students to let their imaginations run wild, crafting narratives that can be as simple or elaborate as they desire.

Plus….

These sentence openers and paragraph starters can be used for both fiction and academic writing. Take a look now and enjoy.

Whether in middle school, high school, or college, these prompts encourage creative thinking and the development of engaging storylines.

Yes. Creating a compelling introduction is more than just adding works on paper. It’s about creating a hook that entices the readers to keep reading.

Students also have to incorporate transition words that create a seamless story flow, helping readers fully immerse in the text. Attention-grabbing and good sentence starters are those that captivate readers from the first sentence of essays, blog posts, novels, a thesis statement, or any other piece of writing.  

Examples of Sentence Starters Listed by Grade Level

Students can use the following sentence starters for essay writing, explaining nonfiction events, sharing interesting stories, or any other writing project.

Ok, it’s time for those lists of introduction sentence starters by grade level now. Here you go!

10 Introduction Sentence Starters For Elementary School Students

• I always wanted to be a ____.
• I never thought I would ____, but I did.
• The most amazing thing happened to me yesterday.
• I was walking home from school when I saw ____.
• I found a ____ and it changed my life.
• I met a ____ who taught me a valuable lesson.
• I had a dream that ____.
• I was scared, but I knew I had to ____.
• I made a new friend who ____.
• I learned that ____ is important.

10 Starters For Middle School Students

• Picture this:…
• Once upon a time in a land not too far from here…
• Did you know that (add an interesting fact or a statistic)…
• Imagine a world where…
• Close your eyes and think about… 
• On a sunny morning, John woke up in excitement, knowing that…
• In a mystical forest of (any made up name of the place), a group of friends stumbled upon…
• In a quiet town, a mischievous girl came across a…
• On the first day of summer break, (character name) discovered a hidden map to…
• In a land of talking animals, he had an extraordinary ability to…

10 Starters For High School Students

• As I delved into the pages of (book name), a single sentence stood out, demanding my attention…
• In a society grappling with (any supernatural issue), some new information… 
• From the bustling streets of (city name), a young boy… 
• One thing I find fascinating is…
• After a series of events, (character name) discovered a hidden truth about a close friend…
• Have you ever noticed how…
• In a world where everyone had a superpower, (character name) was the only one who…
• In a parallel universe, she was faced with a peculiar… 
• At the stroke of midnight, he received a mysterious phone call that…
• During a music festival, (character name) met a stranger who…

10 Starters For College Bound Students

• In the intricate web of politics, an often overlooked detail surfaces…
• As the modern world presents technological breakthroughs at an unprecedented rate, one thing remains constant…
• As I embark on my higher education journey, I have discovered that… 
• In the archives of an old library, I uncovered a book that… 
• On the night of graduation, (character name) found out a shocking truth about…
• Under the glow of a library lamp, (character) lead them to confront personal truths
• On a study abroad adventure, (character) found themselves navigating cultural differences, language barriers, and unexpected…
• As she turned 18, (character) discovered secret powers that could…
• During a scientific experiment, (character) encountered species that can put the world in danger…
• On the battleground where conflicts shaped nations, (character) discovered relics that whispered…

These are just a few examples, and there are many other possibilities. The important thing is to choose a starter that interests the student and gets their imagination going. Once they have a good starting point, they can use their creativity to flesh out the story.

Of course…

I hope you enjoyed these introduction sentence starters and use them with your writers.

Why Use Introduction Sentence Starters with Students

There are many reasons why you might use introduction sentence starters with students in your writing class. Here are a few:

• To help students get started. Writing can be a daunting task, especially for young students. Introduction sentence starters can provide a scaffold for students to get their ideas down on paper.
• To teach students about different writing techniques.  There are many different ways to start a story or essay. Introduction sentence starters can help students learn about different techniques and experiment with different styles.
• To help students engage the reader.  A strong introduction is essential for engaging the reader and keeping them interested in the text. Introduction sentence starters can help students write introductions that are attention-grabbing and interesting.
• To help students improve their grammar and mechanics.  Introduction sentence starters can help students focus on the content of their writing, rather than worrying about grammar and mechanics. This can free up their mental energy to focus on writing a clear and concise introduction.
• To help students build confidence.  When students are able to start their writing with a strong introduction, it can help them build confidence in their writing skills. This can lead to them being more willing to take risks and try new things in their writing.

Overall, introduction sentence starters can be a valuable tool for helping students improve their writing skills. They can provide a scaffold for students to get started, teach them about different writing techniques, help them engage the reader, and improve their grammar and mechanics.

4 Quick and Helpful Tips

Here are some additional tips for using introduction sentence starters with students:

• Model how to use them.  Show students how you would use an introduction sentence starter to start a story or essay.
• Provide a variety of sentence starters.  There are many different types of introduction sentence starters. Provide students with a variety of starters to choose from.
• Encourage students to experiment.  Don’t just tell students to use introduction sentence starters. Encourage them to experiment with different starters and find ones that work for them.
• Provide feedback.  As students write, provide them with feedback on their use of introduction sentence starters. Help them identify areas where they can improve.

By following these tips, you can help students use introduction sentence starters to improve their writing skills.

Now check out this list of…

104 More Free Writing Prompts & Resources

• 35 Marvelous Paragraph Starters to Use in Your Classroom
• 35 Awesome Kids Essay Topics
• 34 Easy to Understand Past Tense Writing Prompts

Ok, that’s all for today.

Until next time, write on…

If you enjoyed these   Introduction Sentence Starters , please share them on Facebook, Twitter, and/or Pinterest. I appreciate it!

Sincerely, Jill journalbuddies.com creator and curator

PS Check out this sentence pattern lesson plan —> Add Rhythm to Your Writing with Sentence Pattern Variation

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The Beginner's Guide to Writing an Essay | Steps & Examples

An academic essay is a focused piece of writing that develops an idea or argument using evidence, analysis, and interpretation.

There are many types of essays you might write as a student. The content and length of an essay depends on your level, subject of study, and course requirements. However, most essays at university level are argumentative — they aim to persuade the reader of a particular position or perspective on a topic.

The essay writing process consists of three main stages:

• Preparation: Decide on your topic, do your research, and create an essay outline.
• Writing : Set out your argument in the introduction, develop it with evidence in the main body, and wrap it up with a conclusion.
• Revision:  Check your essay on the content, organization, grammar, spelling, and formatting of your essay.

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Table of contents

Essay writing process, preparation for writing an essay, writing the introduction, writing the main body, writing the conclusion, essay checklist, lecture slides, frequently asked questions about writing an essay.

The writing process of preparation, writing, and revisions applies to every essay or paper, but the time and effort spent on each stage depends on the type of essay .

For example, if you’ve been assigned a five-paragraph expository essay for a high school class, you’ll probably spend the most time on the writing stage; for a college-level argumentative essay , on the other hand, you’ll need to spend more time researching your topic and developing an original argument before you start writing.

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Before you start writing, you should make sure you have a clear idea of what you want to say and how you’re going to say it. There are a few key steps you can follow to make sure you’re prepared:

• Understand your assignment: What is the goal of this essay? What is the length and deadline of the assignment? Is there anything you need to clarify with your teacher or professor?
• Define a topic: If you’re allowed to choose your own topic , try to pick something that you already know a bit about and that will hold your interest.
• Do your research: Read  primary and secondary sources and take notes to help you work out your position and angle on the topic. You’ll use these as evidence for your points.
• Come up with a thesis:  The thesis is the central point or argument that you want to make. A clear thesis is essential for a focused essay—you should keep referring back to it as you write.
• Create an outline: Map out the rough structure of your essay in an outline . This makes it easier to start writing and keeps you on track as you go.

Once you’ve got a clear idea of what you want to discuss, in what order, and what evidence you’ll use, you’re ready to start writing.

The introduction sets the tone for your essay. It should grab the reader’s interest and inform them of what to expect. The introduction generally comprises 10–20% of the text.

1. Hook your reader

The first sentence of the introduction should pique your reader’s interest and curiosity. This sentence is sometimes called the hook. It might be an intriguing question, a surprising fact, or a bold statement emphasizing the relevance of the topic.

Let’s say we’re writing an essay about the development of Braille (the raised-dot reading and writing system used by visually impaired people). Our hook can make a strong statement about the topic:

The invention of Braille was a major turning point in the history of disability.

2. Provide background on your topic

Next, it’s important to give context that will help your reader understand your argument. This might involve providing background information, giving an overview of important academic work or debates on the topic, and explaining difficult terms. Don’t provide too much detail in the introduction—you can elaborate in the body of your essay.

3. Present the thesis statement

Next, you should formulate your thesis statement— the central argument you’re going to make. The thesis statement provides focus and signals your position on the topic. It is usually one or two sentences long. The thesis statement for our essay on Braille could look like this:

As the first writing system designed for blind people’s needs, Braille was a groundbreaking new accessibility tool. It not only provided practical benefits, but also helped change the cultural status of blindness.

4. Map the structure

In longer essays, you can end the introduction by briefly describing what will be covered in each part of the essay. This guides the reader through your structure and gives a preview of how your argument will develop.

The invention of Braille marked a major turning point in the history of disability. The writing system of raised dots used by blind and visually impaired people was developed by Louis Braille in nineteenth-century France. In a society that did not value disabled people in general, blindness was particularly stigmatized, and lack of access to reading and writing was a significant barrier to social participation. The idea of tactile reading was not entirely new, but existing methods based on sighted systems were difficult to learn and use. As the first writing system designed for blind people’s needs, Braille was a groundbreaking new accessibility tool. It not only provided practical benefits, but also helped change the cultural status of blindness. This essay begins by discussing the situation of blind people in nineteenth-century Europe. It then describes the invention of Braille and the gradual process of its acceptance within blind education. Subsequently, it explores the wide-ranging effects of this invention on blind people’s social and cultural lives.

Write your essay introduction

The body of your essay is where you make arguments supporting your thesis, provide evidence, and develop your ideas. Its purpose is to present, interpret, and analyze the information and sources you have gathered to support your argument.

Length of the body text

The length of the body depends on the type of essay. On average, the body comprises 60–80% of your essay. For a high school essay, this could be just three paragraphs, but for a graduate school essay of 6,000 words, the body could take up 8–10 pages.

Paragraph structure

To give your essay a clear structure , it is important to organize it into paragraphs . Each paragraph should be centered around one main point or idea.

That idea is introduced in a  topic sentence . The topic sentence should generally lead on from the previous paragraph and introduce the point to be made in this paragraph. Transition words can be used to create clear connections between sentences.

After the topic sentence, present evidence such as data, examples, or quotes from relevant sources. Be sure to interpret and explain the evidence, and show how it helps develop your overall argument.

Lack of access to reading and writing put blind people at a serious disadvantage in nineteenth-century society. Text was one of the primary methods through which people engaged with culture, communicated with others, and accessed information; without a well-developed reading system that did not rely on sight, blind people were excluded from social participation (Weygand, 2009). While disabled people in general suffered from discrimination, blindness was widely viewed as the worst disability, and it was commonly believed that blind people were incapable of pursuing a profession or improving themselves through culture (Weygand, 2009). This demonstrates the importance of reading and writing to social status at the time: without access to text, it was considered impossible to fully participate in society. Blind people were excluded from the sighted world, but also entirely dependent on sighted people for information and education.

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The conclusion is the final paragraph of an essay. It should generally take up no more than 10–15% of the text . A strong essay conclusion :

• Returns to your thesis
• Ties together your main points
• Shows why your argument matters

A great conclusion should finish with a memorable or impactful sentence that leaves the reader with a strong final impression.

What not to include in a conclusion

To make your essay’s conclusion as strong as possible, there are a few things you should avoid. The most common mistakes are:

• Including new arguments or evidence
• Undermining your arguments (e.g. “This is just one approach of many”)
• Using concluding phrases like “To sum up…” or “In conclusion…”

Braille paved the way for dramatic cultural changes in the way blind people were treated and the opportunities available to them. Louis Braille’s innovation was to reimagine existing reading systems from a blind perspective, and the success of this invention required sighted teachers to adapt to their students’ reality instead of the other way around. In this sense, Braille helped drive broader social changes in the status of blindness. New accessibility tools provide practical advantages to those who need them, but they can also change the perspectives and attitudes of those who do not.

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Checklist: Essay

My essay follows the requirements of the assignment (topic and length ).

My introduction sparks the reader’s interest and provides any necessary background information on the topic.

My introduction contains a thesis statement that states the focus and position of the essay.

I use paragraphs to structure the essay.

I use topic sentences to introduce each paragraph.

Each paragraph has a single focus and a clear connection to the thesis statement.

I make clear transitions between paragraphs and ideas.

My conclusion doesn’t just repeat my points, but draws connections between arguments.

I don’t introduce new arguments or evidence in the conclusion.

I have given an in-text citation for every quote or piece of information I got from another source.

I have included a reference page at the end of my essay, listing full details of all my sources.

My citations and references are correctly formatted according to the required citation style .

My essay has an interesting and informative title.

I have followed all formatting guidelines (e.g. font, page numbers, line spacing).

Your essay meets all the most important requirements. Our editors can give it a final check to help you submit with confidence.

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An essay is a focused piece of writing that explains, argues, describes, or narrates.

In high school, you may have to write many different types of essays to develop your writing skills.

Academic essays at college level are usually argumentative : you develop a clear thesis about your topic and make a case for your position using evidence, analysis and interpretation.

The structure of an essay is divided into an introduction that presents your topic and thesis statement , a body containing your in-depth analysis and arguments, and a conclusion wrapping up your ideas.

The structure of the body is flexible, but you should always spend some time thinking about how you can organize your essay to best serve your ideas.

Your essay introduction should include three main things, in this order:

• An opening hook to catch the reader’s attention.
• Relevant background information that the reader needs to know.
• A thesis statement that presents your main point or argument.

The length of each part depends on the length and complexity of your essay .

A thesis statement is a sentence that sums up the central point of your paper or essay . Everything else you write should relate to this key idea.

The thesis statement is essential in any academic essay or research paper for two main reasons:

• It gives your writing direction and focus.
• It gives the reader a concise summary of your main point.

Without a clear thesis statement, an essay can end up rambling and unfocused, leaving your reader unsure of exactly what you want to say.

A topic sentence is a sentence that expresses the main point of a paragraph . Everything else in the paragraph should relate to the topic sentence.

At college level, you must properly cite your sources in all essays , research papers , and other academic texts (except exams and in-class exercises).

Add a citation whenever you quote , paraphrase , or summarize information or ideas from a source. You should also give full source details in a bibliography or reference list at the end of your text.

The exact format of your citations depends on which citation style you are instructed to use. The most common styles are APA , MLA , and Chicago .

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Essay – examples & model answers | B2 First (FCE)

FCE Essay Examples:  Topic (Environment) 

Example exam task:.

Example Answer (Grade: 3)

Example answer:.

I think that my country has problems with pollution to the environment like all other countries. This problem is normal for Russia. We have big problems with transport because there are too much cars in our country. And because of that we have problems with atmospeer, air in my city and in all Russia is really dirty and sometimes I can’t make a sigh because it smells around me and of course around that cars on the road. I’ve heard about tradition of one country. They don’t go anywhere by car one day a month or a year, they just use bycicle or their feet. I think it could be very good if we had a tradition like that.

So, what about the rivers and the seas? Yeah, there are some really good and clean rivers and seas where you can go, but there are not many of them. Once I saw the river OB in my city, it was about two years ago but I stil remember that in some places it was not blue, it was green or purple I didn’t really understand because it had different colours.

I don’t know what should we do. Maybe we should just open our eyes and look what we did. But Russian people don’t care about the world around them many people care only about themselves an that’s all.

So, the best idea is look around and try to do something good for our planet and for us and our children.

FCE, CAE, CPE

Practice, write & improve, examiners comments & grade:.

Example Answer (Grade: 3-4)

To begin with pollution and damage to the environment is the most serious and difficult problem for countries of all over the world. Scientists of different countries predict a global ecocatastrophe if people won’t change their attitude to our planet.

First of all a huge damage to the environment brings a transport. People can’t imagine their living without cars, buses, trains, ships and planes. But it’s an open secret that one of disadvantage of these accustomed things is harmful exhaust. Needless to say that use of environment friendly engines helps us to save atmosphere from pollution.

In addition to this our rivers and seas are in not less danger situation. It’s a fact of common knowledge that numerous factories and plants pour off their waste to ponds. Obviously that cleaning manufacturing water helps to avoid extinction of ocean residents.

Apart from this I’m inclined to believe that every person can and must contribute to solving this important problem. Doing a little steps for protection our environment every day we will be able to save our Earth. And it’s a task of each of us.

Model Answer (Grade: 5)

DEVELOPMENT VS ENVIRONMENT

If we surf the web looking for pollution and environmental catastrophes, we will find out that every country in the world suffers them. This is a natural consequence of the struggle between development and environment.

If a country decided to live isolated from the rest of the world, living on what it can naturally grow and produce, it surely wouldn’t be highly polluted. But we all want exotic food and technological items from all over the world, so we have to pay the price.

Investing on electrical transport would benefit the environment a lot. Even more if this electricity came from a natural source of energy like wind, rivers and solar boards. It’s difficult to achieve this because petrol companies will fight against these actions.

We also have to take care of our rivers and seas. We all have heard about factories throwing highly toxic substances to rivers, without minimizing their poisoning effects. A really strict law should be applied to fine these factories and make them change their policy.

But what about ourselves? We also can do a lot! If, when possible, we bought larger packs of food, we would be producing less rubbish. And this is only an example!

FCE Essay Examples: Topic (Fashion) 

In today’s world, the fashion industry has a strong importance in people’s lives. The fashion industry say to the society what to wear and creates new types of clothes all the time.

Some people claim that the fashion industry has a bad effect on people’s lives, they say that the fashion industry creates clothes that the society has to wear. Furthermore, the clothes’ price is extremely high and people, who can’t afford it, should not be in the society.

In the other hand, the fashion industry guide the people to be in a good appearance, because, nowadays, the appearance of the person is more important than the person itself.

In my opinion, the fashion industry doesn’t has a bad influence on people’s lives. It’s something which was created to help people what to wear.

Example Answer (Grade: 4)

Fashion industry is very a discussed subject nowadays: they create and design new clothes everyday in order to satisfy some people needs.

There are many people who claim that the fashion industry is important and good for society. According to them, this industry design beautiful clothes and thanks to that every person can wear shirts, trousers or any acessory which is on today’s fashion.

On the other hand, the fashion industry in some people opinion, controls the market of clothes and because of that they can’t wear what they want to. In addition, the industry can increase the price of clothes, forcing people who don’t want to be “oldfashioned” to buy and pay a large amount of money to keep “beautiful”.

In my opinion, we can’t let the fashion industry decide what we must or musn’t wear. We shouldn’t judge people for its appearance,because that is not important. We must wear whatever we like, want and feel confortable with.

The society we live today is characterised by technology in constant development, fast speed processes, information travelling and getting to people at a blink of an eye and a complex web of social networking. In this context, the fashion industry is becoming increasingly important and having a more and more paramount role in our lives.

On one hand, the fashion industry is undeniably a source of profit and income. It hires millions of people all over the world and generates millions of dollars every year. Furthermore, such profitable business is also believed to be able to spread and make known the culture of a people, encouraging and enhancing a better understanding of each other.

Nevertheless, for those who are neither impressed nor motivated by numbers and figures, the fashion industry is seen as one which segregates people, isolating those who not fit their laws and commands. It is stated that people place too much importance on appearance and the material, world, sadly true, and the fashion industry just spurs on such situation. Moreover, not only are the costs of fashion item unrealistically high, it is thought to be a money better spent on more pressing issues, such as poverty and hunger.

I do believe that the fashion industry, as it is today, has a harmful effect, because it values a minority of people in detriment to the majority. However, it has such a wide reach that, it put into a good use, it can save lives.

FCE Essay Examples: Topic (Languages) 

“There are more reasons to learn a foreign language than to pass a test”

Everything around us revolves around language(s), it is the most important thing in our lives. Society would just not function without it. They are It is our future and I would personaly love to learn as many as I possibly can.

Not everything in life is done because it is necessary. Learning a new language can be a lot of fun. Many people only do it as a hoby, or their knowledge is something that brings them pride and pleasure.

Secondly, we have people who do it simply to challenge themselves. Truly I believe that having a great outcome that stems from your hard work and dedication to learn something new is a wonderful way to challenge prove your ability to yourself and others. Then there is travelling. It is very important to be able to understand and have a conversation with someone abroad, unless you would like to get lost or worse.

To conclude, I think that learning a new language is an amazing thing no matter why you do it. It is always better to do things out of enjoyment, but even if you do it for a test, that knowledge will always be useful.

Learning a a foreign languages is very important nowadays. English, in particular, is essential because it allows is spoken all over the world. That’s the reason why we start studying it from the age of six years old. Going abroad and being able to speak to native people is very satisfying and that’s why I want to improve my knowledge about foreign languages.

I decided to take this exam to know how high my level of English is, but also because I need this certification to go abroad next summer. I really want to come back to Cornwall, an amazing region in the South-West of England. I’ve been there twice with my family, but now I want to go alone. Only being there to England I can really improve my English comprehension and speaking skills.

Fortunately I can will have some English lessons which taught in English at university and I can’t wait for it because it will be an interesting challenge for me. Studying foreign languages is essential to live and to travel. It isn’t simple and I surely have to challenge myself everyday, but the result is so satisfying that we I can’t do without it.

FCE Essay Example: Topic (History) 

A very common topic that is being discussed nowadays is wether schools should teach subjects that some may consider useless later in life. A clear example is history, since it is quite difficult to learn and does not help us in day-to-day activities.

However, many people do not realize the importance of it or that it affects our lives today. For example, our political system would not be this way if it weren’t for the Ancient Greeks, numerous politicians and wars who helped shape democracy and our constitution. Yet it is still thought that it’s useless.

In addition, it is very important that we never forget about our past since we must know where we were standing years ago. Moreover, there are some things, such as World War II, that we have to remember to prevent them from happening again. We should also know where we we were standing a century ago: our origins, our identity. The more you learn about your ethnicity, the better.

All in all, I think that it is extremely important to learn about one’s own country’s history. Anyone who gets the chance to do this should not waste it, since they are very fortunate to have this opportunity

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Your chance of acceptance, your chancing factors, extracurriculars, need help with essay topic sentence examples.

Hey there, I'm having a hard time crafting compelling topic sentences for my college essays. Every resource I've found seems overly simplistic or doesn't feel authentic. Are there any examples you guys found helpful when writing your essays? Thanks in advance!

Absolutely, coming up with compelling topic sentences for your essays can indeed be challenging! It all starts with a succinct idea that sets the tone and direction for the subsequent content. Here are a couple of examples:

1. Dissecting my grandmother's famous chicken pot pie recipe unlocked a world of lessons in creativity, patience, and adaptability.

This portrays a seemingly ordinary event (cooking a family recipe) as a catalyst for personal growth, paving the way for you to delve into these lessons in the body of your essay.

2. Faced with the monumental task of organizing my high school's annual carnival, I realized that leadership was more than a word: it was a call to action.

This focuses on the transformative power of a specific experience, setting the stage to expound on the intricate links between this event and your evolving understanding of leadership.

3. While most of my peers saw our summer internship as just another item to add to their resumes, I viewed it as a golden opportunity to delve deep into the world of artificial intelligence.

This topic sentence communicates both a distinct perspective and a personal passion for artificial intelligence, which you can then discuss in detail.

Remember, your topic sentence doesn't necessarily have to be overly complex or poetic. Its primary purpose is to establish context and provide a roadmap for the reader, outlining where your essay is headed. Keep focused on your story's overall theme and let that guide you in crafting your topic sentences. And don't be afraid to rewrite or revise them—good writing often involves lots of refining!

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Home > Blog > How To Write Good Transition Sentences

How To Write Good Transition Sentences

• Smodin Editorial Team
• Updated: September 24, 2024
• General Guide About Content and Writing

You just got the essay questions you were waiting for, and you’re happy because you know your stuff! Except, wait, you have to actually write the essay. And writing isn’t your forte. So, you’re worried about how to make it read well. Fortunately for you, there’s one easy hack to make your essay read like an expert article: transitions.

Mastering the art of transition sentences is one surefire way to make your essay pop off the page. But what are these sentences exactly?

At their core, transition sentences show the relationship between two or more ideas. Let’s say you’re writing a comparative essay weighing the pros and cons. Each argument is an island, and the transition sentence is the bridge between them.

There are specific words, called transition words, that are crucial building blocks for these sentences. Adding these to your essay shows the reader where they are and where they’re going. It improves the reader’s ability to understand your essay. And if that reader happens to be the person grading it… well, it’s important to get it right.

Check out our article below for more tips on how to write good transition sentences in your essays.

The Importance of Smooth Transitions

Transition sentences are a crucial skill. First and foremost, they keep the reader hooked on what you have to say. Compare these two examples:

Check out these two examples:

• Writing a good essay means understanding the topic. You need to structure your arguments clearly. Providing evidence supports your claims. The conclusion should summarize the main points. Reviewing ensures there are no errors.
• Writing a good essay means understanding the topic. First and foremost, you need to structure your arguments clearly. Then, you can add evidence to support your claims. In the end, a well-written conclusion summarizes the main points. Finally, revising ensures there are no errors.

Simply adding those transition words and phrases adds flow to the paragraph. It means that the text follows a logical path. In other words, the reader understands something about what’s to come in the following sentences.

Overall, transition words can help you write better sentences and can vastly improve your essay’s readability. They improve your communication, which means you’re likely to get a higher grade for your academic writing.

How To Craft Effective Transition Sentences

Writing transition sentences isn’t as easy as tackling a transition word in the beginning. There are a few different ways you can use transitions, and it depends on what you’re using them for. You might be contradicting the previous sentence, leading into a new paragraph, or providing further evidence. Each use case calls for different transition words and phases.

Let’s explore two tips for writing a good transition sentence.

1. Map Your Essay With Clear Transitions

You can think of transition words like signposts that guide the reader through your essay. So, before you even start writing, you can start to think about the different transition words you might use.

This requires a bit of knowledge about the transition words and phrases that are available to you. Let’s use a common one as an example: “in the following sections.” You can use this in the introduction to any academic writing, showing the reader what’s going to come.

While you write out your essay structure, feel free to add some notes on transition words that might apply. We’ll cover the different types of transition words and phrases in more detail later.

2. Start With Engaging Openings Followed by Logical Transitions

Starting your essay with an engaging opening (a good hook) is essential to capture the reader’s attention. You can hook them with a surprising fact, a thought-provoking question, or a vivid anecdote. But the first sentence isn’t the only important one in an essay.

Once you have the reader’s attention, you need to keep it with an engaging, logical flow. Between paragraphs, transition sentences can keep them hooked and ensure they want to keep reading. Not only that, it means that your argument appears cohesively and persuasively.

For example, you might start an essay like this:

“Imagine a world where technology seamlessly integrates into every aspect of our lives. It transforms how we live, work, and play.”

This opening grabs attention by painting a vivid picture. Follow it with a transition that connects this idea to your main argument:

“To understand the impact of this technological revolution, we must first explore its origins and development.”

The reader now knows what’s coming. Not only that, but they’re excited about it. They know that they’re getting to learn about the topic in the punchy first sentence. But they also know that, before they can explore the topic sentence, they’ll have to learn the background info.

If you keep scattering these throughout your essay, it will read really well!

Techniques for Different Types of Transitions

There are many types of transition words and phrases, each suited to a different type of transition. We’ll cover seven of these transition types below, including the important words you’ll need to know for each.

Sequential Transitions

A sequence outlines a particular order. Similarly, sequential transitions show the order of events or logical steps. You’ll often see this type of sentence structure in recipe books, where each step follows the previous one.

Important transition words include:

• Subsequently

Make sure you use the right transition word within the order. For example, you can use some of the transition words above in this order, “First, gather all necessary materials. Next, prepare the solution.” There is a logical order in this example, and the transition words organize the sentence better and make it clearer for the reader.

Additive Transitions

If you want to add further evidence to back up your point, you’ll need an additive transition. This can lead on from the previous paragraph, previous section, or simply the previous sentence.

Common words include:

• Additionally
• Furthermore
• In addition

In the same way, you’ll need to select the right word choice for the context. For example, you could say, “Furthermore, another study looked at the same topic…”. But saying “Besides, another study looked at the same topic,” does not convey the same meaning.

Comparative and Contrasting Transitions

Sometimes, your writing concept requires you to explore more than one idea. So, your paragraph needs to convey a new idea while also highlighting a logical relationship with what you mentioned earlier.

Several transitional words can help you with this:

• On the other hand

Depending on the central theme, you can use these phrases either to talk about similar or contrasting ideas. For example, “Conversely, the alternative method proved effective.” Either way, adding them will provide a more seamless reading experience. It focuses your essay on logical connections between the previous arguments and the current topic.

Causal Transitions

In some essays, you’ll need effective transitions that point out a causal relationship. These indicate cause and effect, showing that one thing happened as a direct result of the other. For example, “Therefore, it is crucial to follow guidelines.” So something happened to bring us to the conclusion that we should follow the given guidelines.

Causal transitions can be used in other contexts as well. Let’s say you’re writing an essay about World War II, for example. You might discuss the consequences that a world war had on various industries.

You’ll need these words to mark causal transition sentences:

• Consequently
• As a result

This applies to a lot of historical essays, whether you’re writing about the Industrial Revolution or feminist movements. But they’re still useful for other essays, too.

Example and Illustration Transitions

The key to any good essay is providing evidence. Read any top-marked essay, and you’ll see phrases like “in the following example…”. These are excellent transition sentences that highlight to the grader that you’re about to introduce evidence.

These are probably the easiest transition words and phrases to include in your essay:

• For example
• For instance

By the way, these are also easy ones to add to your essay structure. All your key points should have an example, so add one of these to each paragraph!

Emphatic Transitions

If you want to stress a previous statement, you can use an emphatic transition phrase. These are great for really highlighting the previous paragraph, and they add to the writing’s flow a lot, too.

Try these ones:

• Undoubtedly

Writing a transition sentence like: “Indeed, the findings are significant” is hard-hitting. However, you should be careful how you use phrases like “undoubtedly.” You might be passionate about the topic, but your reader might draw conclusions differently based on the evidence you provide.

Summarizing Transitions

At the end of your essay, you can use specific transitions to sum things up. These are transition words and phrases like:

• In conclusion
• To summarize

Add one of the summarizing transitions to the new paragraph at the very end of your essay to introduce a good conclusion . For example, “In conclusion, the study supports the hypothesis.” This signals to the reader that you’re about to make your closing argument. This is possibly the most important transition sentence in your essay, so don’t leave it out!

Enhance Your Writing With Smodin’s AI Writer

Transition sentences aren’t always easy to grasp. Ensuring that one paragraph leads smoothly into the next can be a challenge. This is especially the case when you’re trying to fit it within the word count ! Enter: Smodin.io.

Smodin’s AI writer can help you generate content with smooth transitions. For instance, instead of repeating the same transition sentences with “additionally,” Smodin’s AI might suggest “furthermore.” These alternatives all improve flow and readability.

Here are some examples of AI-suggested transitions from Smodin:

• “Having discussed the benefits, let’s now consider the potential drawbacks.”
• “Building on this idea, it is essential to examine the underlying causes.”
• “With this understanding in mind, we can now explore the implications.”
• “To illustrate this point further, let’s look at an example.”

By providing varied transition options, Smodin’s AI writer helps create polished, professional writing that captures and retains the reader’s interest.

Use Smodin Now and Create Great Essays

Hopefully, you are no longer wondering how to write good transition sentences. With all the information you have from our guide and Smodin’s AI writer, you can enhance the quality of your essays and get the grades you deserve.

Ready to discover the power of AI writing? Join Smodin today!

Beyond Plagiarism

Best Practices for the Responsible Use of Sources

Patchwriting as a Technique

I’m trying to paraphrase, but i can’t get far enough from the original language to make it my own. what can i do.

Paraphrasing can be difficult when you’re struggling to understand what a source is saying in the first place. Authors (and you, too!) spend a lot of time carefully choosing the words that they use, but sometimes unfamiliar jargon (the technical terms used in a particular field) can make it hard for you to respond to the original text. Learning academic jargon is just like becoming fluent in a foreign language: you might need to practice using new vocabulary and sentence structures in order to become comfortable with communicating in a new way.

Patchwriting happens when you rephrase a portion of source material, but your language remains too close to the vocabulary and/or sentence structure of the original text. All patchwriting is a kind of paraphrase, but successful paraphrase is not patchwritten.

If you use patchwriting in the final draft of an essay, your teachers will likely see this as an act of plagiarism since you are not directly quoting the original author or successfully using paraphrase or summary to put the author’s ideas into your own words. But patchwriting can have its place in the early stages of note-taking: it can be a useful step in the process of becoming fluent in the language of a particular field or subject, as long as the patchwriting does not remain in your final draft.

So where and when is patchwriting useful?

Let’s say you encounter the following quotation while doing research on the role of women in early 20th century college athletics:

“The logic of separate spheres easily applied to athletics, where physical differences required separate activities. At college the goals of the womanly woman and the manly man included physical fitness. Advocacy of physical exercise took hold during the first generation [of female college students, 1860s-1880], with doctors and educators observing both the dyspeptic tendencies of the young educated male and the chronic weakness of the female participant.”

Solomon, Barbara Miller.  In the Company of Educated Women: A History of Women and Higher Education in America.  New Haven, CT, Yale University Press, 1985, p. 103.

Paraphrase Attempt 1:

Mid-19th century society used physical differences to justify dividing activities into gender-specific separate spheres. Even though college men and women were both encouraged to exercise, the exercises they were to perform were divided because of these sex differences. This was because experts wanted to make sure that college education did not weaken the bodies of students who needed to be properly manly men, and womanly women after their school days were over.

If this paraphrase was in your final draft, you’d have a lot of problems. First of all, the language is too close to the original text without any quotations or citations–phrases like “separate spheres” and “manly men, and womanly women” are taken directly from the original text without attribution, while others like “manly, not sickly, young men” are technically not plagiarized, but they are a little too close to the original text. Text in red in the paragraph above is language that is much too close to the language of the original text. This is a classic example of patchwriting, where unfamiliar terminology (“separate spheres”) is borrowed from the original text.

But if this is the case, why are we talking about patchwriting in the first place?

While not appropriate for a final draft, patchwriting can be part of the process to help you to better understand your source material. Noticing where you have the most difficulty putting the original argument into your own words can point you to concepts that you might need to look up. In this example, you might need to do some research to understand what the “logic of separate spheres” really means. See Module II: Finding Sources if you need help figuring out where to look for this kind of definition.

Logic of separate spheres refers to one of the central ideals of 19th century American culture: that women and men had distinct (separate) physical, mental, and emotional capabilities that corresponded to the assignment of different social roles. Men were seen as best suited for public life and women for private, or domestic, activities.

If we go back to our paraphrase, we can see that this patchwriting is an attempt to figure out what these “separate spheres” are in terms of the argument that the original author is making. Here, patchwriting is being used to help you better understand the original text.

Now that you’ve clarified what these terms mean, you need to figure out what is really important about the original text for the argument you’re making. Doing so is important because even a short quotation can be used to support several different kinds of arguments in your own essay. Your act of patchwriting can help you identify the different components you noticed in the original author’s argument.

You could break down the author’s argument using the author’s original language, but in this case, it’s difficult for you because the author’s original argument is too full of jargon. Your patchwritten paraphrase attempt can make it easier to distill the most important parts of the author’s argument.

Now let’s look at your patchwritten paraphrase sentence by sentence:

Sentence 1) Mid-19th century society used physical differences to justify dividing activities into gender-specific separate spheres.

Sentence 2) Even though college men and women were both encouraged to exercise, the exercises they were to perform were divided because of these sex differences.

Sentence 3) This was because experts wanted to make sure that college education did not weaken the bodies of students who needed to be properly manly men, and womanly women after their school days were over.

For the sake of this exercise, let’s say you want to emphasize the point made in Sentence 2 in order to support the following argument: women were encouraged to be involved in an athletic culture, but football was seen as a sport that was too aggressive for women to play.

Once you’ve figured this out, return to the original source to see if a simple quotation would serve you. In this case, none of the three sentences in the original quote would provide all the information you want to offer, so you’re going to have to turn to paraphrase.

Let’s turn your patchwriting into paraphrase, using what you know about how you want to use this information and what you know about the importance of citing sources.

Paraphrase attempt 2:

Historian Barbara Miller Solomon has argued that exercise was seen as an important part of a mid-19th century college curriculum for both men and women, but cultural ideas about masculinity and femininity meant that each group was using exercise to achieve different roles in society (103).

As you can see, patchwriting helped us to identify unfamiliar jargon (“separate spheres”), determine what the original source was trying to say (cultural ideas about masculinity and femininity that determined different roles in society) and identify what part of the original source text we wanted to use to support our argument.

(Solomon 103)

Sometimes you might need to paraphrase the same passage several times, as we did here, to get away from the original language and sentence structure of the original.

Make sure that any paraphrase is always cited so that your reader can go back to the original source text if she wants to learn more about the author’s argument.

There are a lot of debates around the usefulness of patchwriting, and we’ve drawn our argument from scholars and researchers who see it as a potentially productive step in your writing process.

If you want to learn more about patchwriting, check out this video by Rebecca Moore Howard , the scholar who developed this concept.

Note: If you don’t see the video, allow Flash to run.