spending time alone essay

Essay About Being Alone: 5 Examples and 8 Prompts

To explore your understanding of this subject, read the following examples of an essay about being alone and prompts to use in your next essay.  

Being alone and lonely are often used interchangeably, but they don’t have the same meaning.

Everyone has a different notion of what being alone means. Some think it’s physically secluding yourself from people, while others regard it as the feeling of serenity or hopelessness even in the middle of a crowd.

Being alone offers various benefits, such as finding peace and solitude to reflect and be creative. However, too much isolation can negatively impact physical and mental health . 

By understanding the contrast between the meaning of being alone and being lonely, you’ll be able to express your thoughts clearly and deliver a great essay. 

1. Why I Love Being Alone by Role Reboot and Chanel Dubofsky

2. why do i like being alone so much [19 possible reasons] by sarah kristenson, 3. things to do by yourself by kendra cherry, 4. the art of being alone, but not lonely by kei hysi, 5.  my biggest fear was being alone by jennifer twardowski, 8 writing prompts on essay about being alone, 1. why you prefer to be alone, 2. things learned from being alone, 3. pros and cons of being alone, 4. being alone vs. being lonely, 5. the difference between being alone vs. being with someone else, 6. the fear of being alone, 7. how to enjoy your own company without being lonely.

“For me, being alone is something I choose, loneliness is the result of being alone, or feeling alone when I haven’t chosen it, but they aren’t the same, and they don’t necessarily lead to one another.”

In this essay, the authors make it clear that being alone is not the same as being lonely. They also mention that it’s a choice to be alone or be lonely with someone. Being alone is something that the authors are comfortable with and crave to find peace and clarity in their minds. For more, see these articles about being lonely .

“It’s important to know why you want to be alone. It can help you make the best of that time and appreciate this self-quality. Or, if you’re alone for negative reasons, it can help you address things in your life that may need to be changed.”

Kristenson’s essay probes the positive and negative reasons a person likes being alone. Positive reasons include creativity, decisiveness, and contentment as they remove themselves from drama.

The negative reasons for being alone are also critical to identify because they lead to unhealthy choices and results such as depression. The negative reasons listed are not being able to separate your emotions from others, thinking the people around you dislike you and being unable to show your authentic self to others because you’re afraid people might not like you.

“Whether you are an introvert who thrives on solitude or a gregarious extrovert who loves socializing, a little high-quality time to yourself can be good for your overall well-being.”

In this essay, Cherry points out the importance of being alone, whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert. She also mentions the benefits of allocating time for yourself and advises on how to enjoy your own company. Letting yourself be alone for a while will help you improve your memory, creativity, and attention to detail, making them more productive.

“You learn to love yourself first. You need to explore life, explore yourselves, grow through challenges, learn from mistakes, get out of your comfort zone, know your true potential, and feel comfortable in your own skin. The moment you love yourself, you become immune to loneliness.”

Hysi explores being alone without feeling lonely. He argues that people must learn to love and put themselves first to stop feeling lonely. This can be challenging, especially for those who put themselves last to serve others. He concludes that loving ourselves leads to a better life. 

“We have to be comfortable in our own skin and be willing to be who we truly are, unapologetically. We have to love ourselves unconditionally and, through that love, be willing to seek out what our hearts truly desire — both in our relationships and in our life choices.”

The author discusses why she’s afraid of being alone and how she overcame it. Because she was scared of getting left alone, she always did things to please anyone, even if she wasn’t happy about it.  What was important to her then was that she was not alone. But she realized she would still feel lonely even if she wasn’t alone. 

Learning to be true to herself helped her overcome what she was afraid of. One key to happiness and fulfillment is loving yourself and always being genuine.

Did you finally have ideas about how to convey your thoughts about being alone after reading the samples above? If you’re now looking for ideas on what to talk about in your essay, here are 8 prompts to consider.

Read the best essay writing tips to incorporate them into your writing.

Today, many people assume that individuals who want to be alone are lonely. However, this is not the case for everyone. 

You can talk about a universal situation or feeling your readers will easily understand. Such as wanting to be alone when you’re mad or when you’re burnout from school or work. You can also talk about why you want to be alone after acing a test or graduating – to cherish the moment.

People tend to overthink when they are alone. In this essay, discuss what you learned from spending time alone. Perhaps you have discovered something about yourself, found a new hobby, or connected with your emotions.

Your essay can be an eye-opener for individuals contemplating if they want to take some time off to be alone. Explain how you felt when alone and if there were any benefits from spending this time by yourself.

While being alone has several benefits, such as personal exploration or reflection, time to reboot, etc., too much isolation can also have disadvantages. Conduct research into the pros and cons of alone time, and pick a side to create a compelling argumentative essay . Then, write these in your essay. Knowing the pros and cons of being alone will let others know when being alone is no longer beneficial and they’ll need someone to talk to.

We all have different views and thoughts about being alone and lonely. Write your notion and beliefs about them. You can also give examples using your real-life experiences. Reading different opinions and ideas about the same things broadens your and your readers’ perspectives.

Some people like being with their loved ones or friends rather than spending time alone. In this prompt, you will share what you felt or experienced when you were alone compared to when you were with someone else. For you, what do you prefer more? You can inform your readers about your choice and why you like it over the other.

While being alone can be beneficial and something some people crave, being alone for a long time can be scary for others. Write about the things you are most afraid of, such as, “What if I die alone, would there be people who will mourn for me?”  This will create an emotive and engaging essay for your next writing project.

Learning to be alone and genuinely enjoying it contributes to personal growth. However, being comfortable in your skin can still be challenging. This essay offers the reader tips to help others get started in finding happiness and tranquillity in their own company. Discuss activities that you can do while being alone. Perhaps create a list of hobbies and interests you can enjoy while being alone. 

Interested in learning more? Read our guide on descriptive essay s for more inspiration!

The Beauty of Spending More Time Alone With Yourself

“There’s nothing frightening about spending time alone with yourself; nothing frightening about spending time alone in silence.” ~ Luminita D. Saviuc

Do you know what I realized?

Spending Time Alone with Yourself

There’s nothing frightening about spending time alone with yourself, nothing frightening about spending time alone in silence.

Because only by spending time alone with yourself can you discover what’s hidden deep within yourself. And only by spending time alone in silence can we discover the beauty, the light, the happiness and the unconditional love that’s hidden deep within each and every one of us.

Spending More Time Alone With Yourself

“We live in a very tense society. We are pulled apart… and we all need to learn how to pull ourselves together…. I think that at least part of the answer lies in solitude.” ~ Helen Hayes

We live in a world that teaches us to look for love, for happiness, for approval and validation in all the wrong places. To look for all the things that deep down inside we know we are worthy of having and of receiving, outside of us but rarely or never within ourselves. And because of that, no matter how much we are given, and no matter we gather we never seem to have enough. We always want more, more and more.

Have you ever wondered why is it that even though we make more money, build bigger houses, surround ourselves with more people and more of everything, we never seem to have enough?

“When you are discontent, you always want more, more, more. Your desire can never be satisfied. But when you practice contentment, you can say to yourself, ‘Oh yes – I already have everything that I really need.” ~ Dalai Lama

“Everything in the universe is within you. Ask all from yourself.” ~ Rumi

What if deep down inside, our prior condition is love, light, and happiness?

“Your mind knows only some things. Your inner voice, your instinct, knows everything. If you listen to what you know instinctively, it will always lead you down the right path.” ~   Henry Winkler

This is what spending time alone with yourself, in silence does to you. It quiets the mind and it awakens the heart. It puts all your fears to sleep and it awakens the powerful and magnificent love that is present within you and within all of us.

“They can’t say, ‘Here it is!’ or ‘There it is!’ You see, the kingdom of God is within you.”” ~ Luke 17:21

It is all within you… love, joy, happiness, abundance, and contentment… it’s all within you, and the more time you spend alone with yourself in silence, the more it will be revealed to you. So take the time to know yourself, to spend time alone with yourself and to love yourself. Because only by loving yourself will you be able to truly and authentically love those around you.

Luminita D. Saviuc

Luminita is the Founder and Editor in Chief of PurposeFairy.com and also the author of 15 Things You Should Give Up to Be Happy: An Inspiring Guide to Discovering Effortless Joy . For more details check out the 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy Book Page.

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How Important Is Alone Time for Mental Health?

Verywell / Madelyn Goodnight

• Personality and Alone Time

Aloneness vs. Loneliness

• Signs You Need It
• Ways to Get It
• Getting Others to Respect It
• Overcoming Fear of Alone Time

People tend to be social creatures, and research has shown that social connections are vital for both emotional and physical well-being. However, alone time, which is sometimes called private time or solitary time and simply means spending time by yourself, is also good for you as it plays a positive role in mental health.

Being around other people comes with rewards, but it also creates stress . You might worry about what people think or alter your behavior to avoid rejection and to fit in with the rest of the group. While this may be the cost of being part of a social world, some of these challenges demonstrate why alone time can be so important.

Benefits of Alone Time

Having time for yourself gives you the chance to break free from social pressures and tap into your own thoughts, feelings , and experiences. Finding time to be alone can also have a number of key benefits. Some of these include:

• Improved personal exploration
• Increased creativity
• More social energy

Improved Personal Exploration

Becoming comfortable in your own company can give you the time and freedom to truly explore your own passions without interference. It can be a way to try new things, research topics that fascinate you, acquire knowledge, and even practice new methods of self-expression.

Giving yourself alone time means you can explore these things without the pressures and judgments that others may impose. Having time to yourself is critical for growth and personal development. Instead of worrying about the needs, interests, and opinions that others may have, alone time lets you focus on yourself .

Increased Creativity

Alone time is an opportunity to let your mind wander and strengthen your creativity . Without the need to care for or interact with other people, you can ignore outside influences and focus inward.

Research actually suggests that being alone can lead to changes in the brain that help fuel the creative process. One study found that people who tend to purposely withdraw in order to spend time alone also tend to be highly creative people .

In a 2020 study published in the journal Nature Communications , researchers found that perceived social isolation (a.k.a. loneliness) led to increased activity in the neural circuits related to imagination. When left with a lack of social stimulation, the brain ramps up its creative networks to help fill the void.

More Social Energy

Living alone tends to be seen in a negative light. However, researchers have found that people who live alone may actually have richer social lives and more social energy than people who cohabitate with others.

In his book “Going Solo,” sociologist Eric Klineberg notes that one in seven U.S. adults lives alone. Klineberg found that not only were these adults not lonely, many actually had richer social lives.

The COVID-19 pandemic demonstrated both the challenges of loneliness and a lack of solitary time. While many people struggled with feelings of isolation and loneliness, others faced the challenges of suddenly spending a great deal of time in close quarters with family members or roommates. Blurred work-life boundaries and a lack of time apart meant that many people were suddenly struggling with a complete lack of alone time.

Reasons Why Alone Time Isn’t Always Easy

Alone time can be challenging for some people for a variety of reasons. One study found that many people would prefer to give themselves painful electric shocks rather than sit alone with their own thoughts.

Some of these reasons people might struggle with being alone include:

• Lack of experience being alone : Some people just might not be used to being by themselves because they are so accustomed to being around other people. The sudden absence of social stimulation can leave them feeling detached or disconnected. 
• Distressing thoughts and feelings : In other cases, being alone and focusing inward can be difficult or even painful. People might find this introspection distressing or find themselves engaging in rumination and worry.
• Social stigma : Stigma about being alone can also play a role in shaping how people feel about solitude. For those who have been exposed to negative attitudes towards being alone or who see it as a form of antisocial behavior or social rejection, solitude can seem like a painful form of punishment.

Marketing professor and researcher Rebecca Ratner of the University of Maryland found that people often avoid doing things they enjoy if they have to do them alone. This is particularly true if it is an activity that can be observed by others, such as going to dinner or a movie solo.

Such findings suggest that a stigma about being alone influences whether people think they enjoy such activities. "When people do things alone, they enjoy themselves more than they expected," Ratner explains. "People overestimate the benefits of being with someone else."

How Personality Affects the Need for Alone Time

It is also important to note that aspects of your personality, as well as your individual preferences, can play a role in determining how much alone time you need and how beneficial it may be. Extroverts tend to feel energized by social experiences, for example, so solitude might be more challenging for them. Introverts , on the other hand, gain energy from being alone.

However, don't think that just because you are an extrovert that you won't enjoy spending time by yourself. In one study, social psychologist Thuy-vy Thi Nguyen found that introverts and extroverts didn't actually differ in the amount of enjoyment they gained from solitude. Contrary to popular belief, introverts didn't enjoy solitude any more than extroverts.

"Our findings suggested that individuals who stay true to their choices and convictions are more likely to take interest and see value in spending time with themselves, despite their propensities for sociality or insecurity around other people," the authors explain.

No matter what your personality type , there may be times you can benefit from some quality time to yourself.

Even before the pandemic, experts warned of a loneliness epidemic that threatened the wellness of people of all ages. Research suggests that people experience more loneliness now than they have in the past. According to one 2018 report, half of Americans feel lonely sometimes, while 25% report feeling lonely almost all the time.

There is an abundance of evidence showing that loneliness can have devastating health consequences. It has been linked to elevated blood pressure, hastened cognitive decline, social anxiety, and an increased risk for Alzheimer's disease.

Loneliness is linked to a wide range of negative health consequences, including a higher risk for depression, anxiety, obesity, high blood pressure, and early death.

But it is important to remember that being alone doesn’t equal loneliness. Where loneliness is marked by negative feelings associated with isolation, alone time involves finding freedom, inspiration, and rejuvenation in solitude. 

More recently, researchers have begun to explore the idea that a certain amount of quality alone time can be just as vital for emotional and physical wellness .

Signs You Need Some Alone Time

It’s not always easy to recognize the signs that you might need some time away from other people. Some signs to watch for include:

• Feeling short-tempered
• Getting easily irritated by sometimes minor things 
• Losing interest in doing things with other people
• Feeling overwhelmed or overstimulated 
• Having trouble concentrating
• Getting anxious about spending time with other people

The good news is that, even if you are struggling with any of these signs, a little alone time can have a significant restorative effect. In one study, people who reported spending approximately 11% of their time alone experienced fewer negative feelings in subsequent demanding social experiences.

Ways to Get Your Alone Time

If you are thinking of spending some time alone, it is important to do so in ways that are beneficial to your mental well-being. Being alone is most beneficial when it is voluntary. It’s also important that you feel like you can return to your social world whenever you like.

• Pick a time : Figure out when you’d like to spend some time alone. Plan that time into your schedule and make sure that other people know that they shouldn’t interrupt you during that time.
• Turn off social media : Work on eliminating distractions, particularly ones that invite social comparisons . Your focus should be on your own thoughts and interests and not on what other people are doing.
• Plan something : Not everyone is comfortable spending time alone, so you might find it helpful to plan out what you want to do. This might involve some relaxation time, exploring a favorite hobby, or reading a book.
• Take a walk : Research has found that being outside can have a beneficial impact on well-being. If you're feeling cooped up and stifled by too much social interaction, spending a little time outdoors by yourself enjoying a change of scenery can have a restorative effect.

Think about things that you might like to do by yourself , then start doing them alone.

How Much Alone Time Is Healthy?

Each person has differing needs for solitude and social time. Some might need just a few minutes now and then to reset a bad mood, while others might require more extensive stretches of alone time. Try finding a balance between the two that works for your unique needs.

Getting Others to Respect Your Alone Time

Finding time to be alone isn’t always easy. Those around you may have different social needs and may not understand your need for solitude. Family obligations and parenting responsibilities can also make it tough to carve out time for yourself.

Some steps that you can’t take to ensure that you get the time you need:

• Be clear : Tell the people around you, whether they are roommates, family members, or your partner, that you need time alone. 
• Be specific : Let people know what this means. For example, you might say that you need a certain amount of uninterrupted time to read a book, watch a television show, or listen to a podcast.
• Return the favor : If people are willing to take steps to ensure that you get some alone time, it is important for you to show them the same consideration. Offer to take on some responsibilities while they have some space to themselves.
• Be flexible : If you are trying to find time for yourself when you don't live alone or you live in close quarters with other people, you'll probably need to be flexible and look for opportunities to carve out time for yourself.

Try waking up early in the morning to enjoy some peaceful time to yourself before others in the house start to wake. If that isn't an option, doing things like going for a walk outdoors or having other family members watch the kids or take over household duties while you take a break can be helpful.

Tips to Overcome a Fear of Alone Time

If the thought of being alone makes you fear that you'll end up feeling lonely, research suggests it may be helpful to reframe time spent alone as solitude. In one study, participants were assigned to either read about the prevalence of loneliness, read a passage about the benefits of solitude, or read about an unrelated topic.

After completing this reading, the participants sat alone for a 10-minute period. In each condition, people experienced decreases in both negative and positive feelings. Such results suggest that while being alone might not always boost your mood, it can help you better regulate your emotions . 

The study also found that while people who read about the benefits of solitude didn't necessarily experience a better mood, they didn't have the same reduction of positive feelings that those in the other two groups did.

Such findings suggest that reassessing how you look at spending time alone can play an important role in moderating the potentially negative effects of loneliness.

A Word From Verywell

While being alone sometimes gets mistaken for being lonely, it is clear that having time to yourself now and then is important for mental health and well-being. If the thought of spending time on your own makes you feel bored or uncomfortable, try starting with a small chunk of alone time that allows you to focus on a specific task.

As you get better at enjoying your own company, you may find that this alone time helps you feel renewed and inspired for when you do return to your social circle.

Bowker JC, Stotsky MT, Etkin RG. How BIS/BAS and psycho-behavioral variables distinguish between social withdrawal subtypes during emerging adulthood . Pers Individ Diff . 2017;119:283-288. doi:10.1016/j.paid.2017.07.043

Spreng RN, Dimas E, Mwilambwe-Tshilobo L, et al. The default network of the human brain is associated with perceived social isolation . Nat Commun . 2020;11(1):6393. doi:10.1038/s41467-020-20039-w

Klineberg E. Going Solo: The Extraordinary Rise and Surprising Appeal of Living Alone . Penguin; 2013.

Wilson TD, Reinhard DA, Westgate EC, et al. Just think: The challenges of the disengaged mind . Science . 2014;345(6192):75-77. doi:10.1126/science.1250830

Ratner RK, Hamilton RW. Inhibited from bowling alone . J Consum Res . 2015;(42)2:266-283. doi:10.1093/jcr/ucv012

University of Maryland's Robert H. Smith School of Business. Tips for overcoming alone time still caused by COVID-19, via Maryland Smith expert . PRNewswire.

Nguyen TT, Weinstein N, Ryan R. Who enjoys solitude? Autonomous functioning (but not introversion) predicts self-determined motivation (but not preference) for solitude . PsyArXiv. 2018. doi:10.31234/osf.io/sjcwg 

Cigna. New Cigna study reveals loneliness at epidemic levels in America .

Holt-Lunstad J, Smith TB, Baker M, Harris T, Stephenson D. Loneliness and social isolation as risk factors for mortality: a meta-analytic review . Perspect Psychol Sci . 2015;10(2):227-237. doi:10.1177/1745691614568352

Birditt KS, Manalel JA, Sommers H, Luong G, Fingerman KL. Better off alone: daily solitude is associated with lower negative affect in more conflictual social networks . Pruchno R, ed. The Gerontologist . 2019;59(6):1152-1161. doi:10.1093/geront/gny060

Thomas V, Balzer Carr B, Azmitia M, Whittaker S. Alone and online: understanding the relationships between social media, solitude, and psychological adjustment . Psychology of Popular Media . 2021;10(2):201-211. doi:10.1037/ppm0000287

Ewert A, Chang Y. Levels of nature and stress response . Behav Sci (Basel) . 2018;8(5). doi:10.3390/bs8050049

Rodriguez M, Bellet BW, McNally RJ. Reframing time spent alone: reappraisal buffers the emotional effects of isolation . Cognit Ther Res . 2020:1-16. doi:10.1007/s10608-020-10128-x

By Kendra Cherry, MSEd Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."

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It we are not with others, we are texting, phoning, emailing but spending some time with yourself can reap enormous benefits.

In this pro-social world we are strongly influenced in favor of being with people, or at least constantly interacting with others, be it through social media or other electronic means. We are always going somewhere, doing something or at least chatting to someone about going somewhere or doing something.

What if you stepped away from all of that and took some time just to be alone? Took time to just do your own thing, on your own and in your own way?

Here are 10 benefits of spending time alone:

1) there is no pressure as to how well you perform..

When you are alone you can take time to become involved in activities that you really enjoy with no pressure as to how well you perform them or how accomplished you are. The joy is in the doing, in the experiencing and in your own inner enjoyment of expressing yourself.

2) Your unique brand of creativity flourishes.

Your unique brand of creativity flourishes when you are removed from outside influences. If you want to paint your house, paint a picture, design something, write something, invent something, spend quiet time allowing your imaginative genius freedom to explore possibilities. It can be a most rewarding experience. Explore your abilities and interests. You may come up with something that will change your life.

3) Gear down, refresh and get ready to tackle the world.

We live in a very hectic society. Stress and stress related illness is at an all-time high. Spending time on your own allows you to gear down, refresh and be more ready to tackle the outside world when you re-emerge.

4) Quiet time can help you sort through problems.

Just sitting down and thinking through a problem, thinking about what caused it and how best to resolve it can result in very effective solutions. But even if a solution is not forthcoming, just having taken the time to think things through and to understand the problem more thoroughly can bring peace and a certain courage to carry on.

5) Get a better understanding of yourself.

Do you truly know yourself? Do you feel you really understand who you are? Most people do not. While spending more time alone may not bring you the complete answer to this question, it can certainly give you a much better understanding of how you truly feel about things going on in your life. You can discover more of your abilities, your passions, your interests and even your dislikes. You get a feel for yourself, who you are and where you fit in the world. This brings self-confidence .

6) You may find a new best friend.

Contentment with life is strongly based on contentment with who you are. If you spend time alone, you find out more about yourself. If you really dig down and get to know yourself thoroughly, and to enjoy who you are, your interactions with the world will work out better too because when you know and like who you are as a person it shows through everything you do and say. It is a very attractive quality.

7) Get more done.

Do you have a list of things you need to do, want to do? Is your list one of these that never seems to get any shorter because you are always too busy to get around to doing the things on the list? Spending time on your own will allow you uninterrupted time to get these things done. You may or may not enjoy doing them, depending on what is on your list, but you will definitely feel better for having finished them. You will emerge with less stress, less weighing on your mind and the satisfaction of a job well done.

8) Become more relaxed and tolerant.

Do you sometimes feel irritable and get easily annoyed with people? Do you find a great many “jerks” around you at times? The more annoying people appear to you, and more of them there are, the more you could benefit from some time on your own. You cannot change the world, you cannot change what other people say or do. But you can change your perspective on them. After some calm, peaceful time on your own doing whatever pleases you, or doing nothing at all, you will find the annoyances in life shrink dramatically because you are now relaxed and more tolerant.

9) Explore the possibilities for your life.

You can explore the possibilities for your life. What would you like to achieve or do? How can you go about it? What do you need to do to be able to start? Think things through. Allow your mind to wander. Do not relegate anything as impossible. Just keep on thinking about what would give you the most satisfaction, the most joy. What is that? Take time alone to look inside and ponder on what would make your life the most worth living, both for yourself and for those you love. It may be something that comes through your work or not. The important thing is that it is what brings you joy and engages your passion.

10) Enjoy time with someone awesome.

And finally, it is a great idea to spend time on your own because you are awesome and spending time with someone awesome is a wonderful, exhilarating, amazing thing to be able to do. Spend time alone and celebrate you.

Time by yourself can benefit you in so many ways plus making the time you spend with others more enjoyable as a result of being more in tune with yourself and more relaxed. What would you enjoy doing on your own?

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Today there is stigma surrounding the idea of being alone. Many people think that if someone sees them spending time alone, they’ll seem weird or not very sociable. How many times have you wanted to go to a football game or a concert, but didn’t because you had no one to go with? People are uncomfortable with being alone because of what others may think, but we shouldn’t be. Being alone is something to embrace.

When I was younger, I remember loving the movie theater, but would often avoid going if I couldn’t find someone to go with. Either my friends were busy or just weren’t interested in the movie. As a result, I would skip out on a movie I was excited to see just because I thought it seemed sad to sit by myself. As I grew older, I realized that it’s ridiculous to stop myself from doing something I’d enjoy just because I’d have to do it solo. So, I started going to the movies alone.

Soon enough, I started going to football games alone too. I stopped picking up my phone out of nervousness when I was eating in public because I no longer cared that I was eating by myself. You know what? I felt cool. I was able to do things on my own terms. The truth of the matter is that being able to enjoy time with yourself is something we all take for granted. You often don’t get that much alone time, and alone time is a good thing.

As you grow older, it is likely you will be working a full-time job, maybe moving in with a significant other and even raising children. The amount of time you have for yourself is not much.

According to Senior Research Connect , “People in their 40s and 50s spend about 4 hours and 45 minutes alone, and those younger than 40 spend about three and a half hours a day alone.”

Why not enjoy the free time you have now and learn to embrace your own company?

There is something incredibly peaceful about sitting with a cup of coffee in the morning and journaling rather than scrolling on your phone. It is nice to read at the beach with no distractions instead of trying to entertain a group of friends. Don’t get me wrong, it is just as important to spend time with other people, but it is more normalized than spending time alone. If you wait to be by yourself until you’re 60 years old, you’ll likely struggle with loneliness. I feel it is important to get accustomed to spending time alone now and experiencing the benefits.

According to a report by Psych Central, alone time encourages independence, builds confidence, regulates emotions and helps problem solving. Furthermore, lack of alone time can cause anxiety, agitation and decreased creativity. It is crucial to your physical and mental health to experience solitude, and it is important that you allow yourself to enjoy that time rather than being insecure about it. The next time you want to go do something, consider going by yourself before inviting someone else.

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The Benefits of Being Alone

Get to know yourself, dance like no one’s watching, get outside, be mindful of your social media usage, remember: you don’t need to be productive.

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Being connected to people is important for your happiness and well-being, but it’s also helpful to balance social time with taking time for yourself. Learning to be alone can give you space to think about your feelings, ideas, hopes, problems, and experiences. It’s also a great opportunity to get to know yourself better and spend time resting and relaxing.

It’s not always easy to spend time alone though. Social media—along with the pressure of creating a vibrant social life once you go to college or live on your own—might make you feel like you need to hang out with friends or do something all the time.

If you feel lonely or bored when spending time by yourself, you’re not alone in feeling this way. Read on to learn more about how you can make spending time alone more enjoyable and positive.

One of the greatest benefits of spending time alone is that it can help you develop a better understanding of who you are. The better you know yourself, the more likely you are to do things that you love, learn things that interest you, and spend time with people who make you feel good. 

Knowing yourself also builds confidence that can help you navigate all types of situations. To get to know yourself better, spend time reflecting or journaling. You might try one of these journal prompts for self-discovery . You could also try a creative outlet such as making music, drawing, painting, or putting together a vision board.

Find out other ways to get to know and see yourself

When you’re alone, you’re free to try things you may feel uncomfortable doing for the first time in front of others. Being alone allows you to dance, sing, paint, play an instrument, do magic, or build something. You can try new things without being nervous about what others may think. Take this time to be silly and playful.

Want to dance right now? Try this 18-minute dance workout

If we spend most of our time with other people, we always have to be “on.” All that social time can be draining. Time for yourself is a great way to recharge your social battery and slow down for a bit. 

Do whatever feels relaxing to you, whether it’s reading a book, watching TV, playing a game, or going for a walk. Taking this time to recharge might also make being with others more enjoyable, since you’ve had time to rest and might have more energy to devote to friends or group activities.

There’s a ton of research about the benefits of spending time outdoors. Taking some time in nature can be refreshing and a great way to enjoy alone time while in the good company of Mother Nature. 

You don’t have to do anything fancy. Just going for a walk in your neighborhood, sitting in the park, or hiking in the woods can center you and improve your mood.

When you spend time on your own, your first instinct may be to reach for your phone and scroll on social media. There’s nothing wrong with watching some TikToks or scrolling through Instagram during your downtime, but try to be mindful of how it makes you feel. 

Do you enjoy the content, or does it make you feel left out or lead you to compare yourself to others? If being on social media makes you feel down, you may want to do something else or seek out content that makes you feel good, such as a YouTube video from your favorite creator or an inspiring Pinterest board. 

Learn more about how to protect your mental health when you use social media .

Alone time doesn’t necessarily need to have an end goal. If lounging in your dorm or apartment or binge-watching a show feels right to you, then do it. You don’t need to be productive when spending time with yourself. Instead, try to focus on being present and enjoying the moment.

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If this is a medical emergency or if there is immediate danger of harm, call 911 and explain that you need support for a mental health crisis.

Why we owe it to ourselves to spend quiet time alone every day

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By not giving ourselves the minutes — or hours — free of devices and distractions, we risk losing our ability to know who we are and what’s important to us, says physicist and writer Alan Lightman.

In 2016, the Harvard biologist emeritus and naturalist E.O. Wilson (TED Talk: Advice to a young scientist ) published Half-Earth: Our Planet’s Fight for Life , in which he proposes that half the earth’s surface be designated and protected as conservation land. Just since 1970, human beings have destroyed more than 30 percent of forests and the marine ecosystem, according to the World Wide Fund for Nature. The destruction has been an unintended consequence of population growth, the desire for increased material wealth and comfort, and the associated need for more energy. It’s also been driven by the inexorable imperative of capitalism and the powerful desire of certain individuals to increase their personal wealth. Wilson’s proposal might be difficult to achieve, but it represents a recognition of the importance of our natural environment and the forces that threaten it.

The destruction of our inner selves via the wired world is an even more recent, and more subtle, phenomenon. The loss of slowness, of time for reflection and contemplation, of privacy and solitude, of silence, of the ability to sit quietly in a chair for fifteen minutes without external stimulation — all have happened quickly and almost invisibly. A hundred and fifty years ago, the telephone didn’t exist. Fifty years ago, the Internet didn’t exist. Twenty-five years ago, Google didn’t exist.

The situation is dire. Just as with global warming, we may already be near the point of no return. Invisibly, almost without notice, we are losing ourselves. We are losing our ability to know who we are and what is important to us. We are creating a global machine in which each of us is a mindless and reflexive cog, relentlessly driven by the speed, noise, and artificial urgency of the wired world.

I would like to make a bold proposal: that half our waking minds be designated and saved for quiet reflection.

What can we do? Somehow, we need to create a new habit of mind, as individuals and as a society. We need a mental attitude that values and protects stillness, privacy, solitude, slowness, personal reflection; that honors the inner self; that allows each of us to wander about without schedule within our own minds.

Wilson’s proposal is bold, and I would like to make a similarly bold proposal: that half our waking minds be designated and saved for quiet reflection. Otherwise, we are destroying our inner selves and our creative capacities. Different moments throughout the day can be devoted to contemplation and stillness, free from the external world.

How do we cultivate a contemplative habit of mind? Twenty years ago, a friend who taught high school in Arlington, Massachusetts, started something new with her students. At the beginning of each class, she rang a bell and asked them to remain silent for four minutes. As she wrote later, “I explained [to my students] that I felt our school days were too fast-paced and filled with noise, that silence could help us leave behind the previous class, and prepare to be present for this one. That it was a time to clear our heads. I said we were aiming for internal and external stillness.” The results were miraculous, she told me. Both she and the students were calmer and more centered.

In recent years, numerous organizations — such as Mindful Schools and Mindful Education — have been created to introduce periods of quiet and meditation into primary and secondary schools. For example, in 2015, mind-body educator Stacy Sims started a program called Mindful Music Moments in which students listen to four minutes of classical music during the morning announcement period — similar to the idea of my friend in Massachusetts. Mindful Music Moments now operates in 65 K-12 schools, camps, and social service organizations, most of them in Cincinnati.

Perhaps there could be mandated screen-free zones in public spaces and labor laws that guarantee workers a half hour each day of quiet time at the workplace.

To develop new habits of mind, different groups must use different methods. I have some recommendations, which should be viewed as starting points rather than comprehensive solutions:

• For K-12 students, a ten-minute period of silence sometime during the school day. Students could quietly write down thoughts in a notebook during this time. Different schools have different cultures, and each school will know how best to institute this period of silence.

• For college students, “introspective intensive” courses created by each academic department. Each student would be required to take at least one such course each semester. Introspective courses, while based in the particular subject matter of the department — for example, history or chemistry — would have a reduced load of reading and assignments and encourage students to use the free time to reflect on what they are learning and relate it to their lives and life goals.

• In the workplace, a quiet room or similar space where employees are permitted and encouraged to spend a half hour each day meditating, reflecting, or simply being silent. Smartphones and computers would not be allowed in the quiet room. This period of quiet would not be part of the regular lunch break.

• For families, an unplugged hour during the evening, perhaps during dinner, in which all phones, smartphones, computers, and other devices are turned off. Dinner should be a time for quiet conversation.

• Individuals should think about how they spend their time each day and try to build in a half hour away from the wired world, such as taking a walk while unplugged, reading, or simply sitting quietly.

• For society as a whole, mandated screen-free zones in public spaces, where digital devices are forbidden, and labor laws in which workers are guaranteed a half hour each day of quiet time at the workplace.

Don’t we owe all of our children a world in which their contemplative lives are valued and supported? Don’t we owe it to ourselves?

I believe that we can develop a new habit of mind toward the wired world, but it will take time. We will first need to recognize the danger. Certainly, younger people should take some responsibility for their addiction to the wired world at the expense of their inner selves. But shouldn’t we who created that world take more responsibility? We are victims ourselves, but we are also the perpetrators. Don’t we owe all of our children a world in which their contemplative lives are valued and supported? Don’t we owe it to ourselves?

Although changing habits of mind is difficult, it can be done. With a little determination, each of us can find a half hour a day to waste time. And when we do so, we give ourselves a gift. It is a gift to our spirit. It is an honoring of that quiet, whispering voice. It is a liberation from the cage of the wired world. It is freedom. Decades ago, when I was that boy walking home from school through the woods, following turtles as they slowly lumbered down a dirt path, wasting hours as I watched tadpoles in the shallows or the sway of water grasses in the wind, I was free. We cannot return to that world, nor would we necessarily want to, but we can create some of that space within our world today. We can create a preserve within our own minds.

Excerpted from the new book In Praise of Wasting Time by Alan Lightman. Reprinted with permission from TED Books/Simon & Schuster. © 2018 Alan Lightman.

Watch Alan Lightman’s TEDxWellesleyCollege Talk here:

About the author

Alan Lightman is a physicist, novelist and essayist. He was educated at Princeton University and at the California Institute of Technology, where he received a PhD in theoretical physics. He is the author of six novels, including the international bestseller Einstein’s Dreams, three collections of essays, a book-­length narrative poem, a memoir and several books on science. His writing has appeared in The Atlantic, Granta, The New Yorker and The New York Review of Books, among other publications.

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The Benefits Of Solitude: How To Be Happy Alone

If you're single or don't have close friends and family, seeing other people in relationships might make you feel lonely. Whether out in public or scrolling on social media, seeing other couples and friends having fun together could make you upset about being alone. However, there can be several benefits to being alone. You can learn more about your personality, improve your well-being, and work toward self-fulfillment by spending time alone. Understanding the benefits of solitude may give you hope and a sense of peace, even when you don't have others around you.

What does it mean to be happy alone?

Being happy alone may mean finding peace with your flaws, circumstances, and significance in the world. It could mean believing and understanding that your presence is valuable, no matter what you believe others want from you.  

According to recent research, people who enjoy their alone time are less likely to be tense, moody, and worried, suggesting that having alone time isn't necessarily harmful and can be beneficial. 

Note that being happy alone isn't the same as isolating yourself from others as a symptom of a mental illness or another challenge. If you're struggling with your mental health, connecting with others and being honest about what you're going through can be healthy. Being happy alone doesn't mean neglecting your emotional needs, relationships, or desires, as social connection is an essential aspect of being human. 

Ways to enjoy your time alone 

Spending joyous time with yourself can be a significant step in the right direction when trying to be happy alone. Below are a few ways you can get started. 

Ask yourself what gives you a sense of purpose 

When alone, consider what makes you truly happy. Ask yourself the following:

• What situations make you genuinely smile?
• What are your core interests? 
• What are values and moral codes you believe you can't live without?  
• When was the last time you felt a sense of "awe"? 
• What do you believe your "life purpose" is? 
• What would you do if nothing were holding you back? 

Make a list of everything you can think of that makes you happy. You can list "the little things," like sipping a mug of tea or planting flowers, or big-picture ideas like traveling the world or volunteering. Look at this list as soon as you wake up each day, and try to include at least one item on your list in your daily routine.

Learn a new skill 

List ten skills you've wanted to learn but haven't gotten around to. Spending time in solitude allows you to concentrate all your energy on what you want to focus on without worrying about another person's desires. Alone time can also inspire opportunities for creativity. Picking up new hobbies can allow you to learn more about yourself, cultivate patience, and express yourself in new ways.

In this step, consider going outside of your comfort zone. If you're not ready to pick up a new hobby or explore interests, make a point to go somewhere new each week. For example, you could visit a coffee shop down the street or in a distant town. You might find that exploring new places alone is rewarding, as you can go at your own pace and follow your own schedule.

Breathe and be patient 

When learning to be alone, try not to put too much pressure on yourself. If you are frequently stressed, anxious, or depressed, try spending time each day focusing on your thoughts and feelings. One way to start is by keeping a journal. If you let yourself write freely for 30 minutes of uninterrupted time each day, you may come up with unique ideas. Journaling can be a form of self-care by helping you reach the core of emotional problems, and you may learn something new about yourself each day. Writing can also act as a release , so stress and other emotions you may have been holding onto can be expressed.

Practice meditation and yoga 

Meditation and yoga may alleviate stress. Both practices focus on self-awareness and the importance of silence. If you don't have time to commit to an entire yoga routine each morning, consider setting aside five or ten minutes of peaceful time to sit, close your eyes, and breathe evenly. 

In the silence, you can try to empty your mind of all worries, plans, and thoughts. Try not to let your mind wander, and focus on the present moment. In addition, look for a quiet place without distractions and let yourself be. These activities can relax your mind and may offer a clear-headed approach to each day.

Set new goals

Setting positive life goals may improve your well-being and offer you a better sense of direction and self-worth, no matter how small the goals seem. These goals may be related to health, such as starting a new exercise routine or eating more vegetables. Contrarily, they could be related to creativity or your interest in learning to draw or writing short stories. Whatever the goal, visualize yourself completing it. What kind of person could you be when you achieve it? What emotions might you experience?

Many significant life goals can seem daunting, especially when focusing primarily on the first step. When listing your goals, start small. For example, if you want to run a marathon, you might not want to force yourself to sign up for one and complete it in the same week. Instead, consider beginning a training regimen. You can start small by power walking around the block several times daily. When this step gets more manageable, try jogging around the block. When that step becomes more convenient, try for a mile, trying to beat your time each week. Your body and form may become stronger every week, allowing you to complete the marathon efficiently. This method of minor steps toward larger goals may boost self-confidence and motivate you to progress. 

Switch up your routine

Being stuck in a routine can make life seem slower and more repetitive. When the days start to blur into weeks, the world could seem duller, and it may be difficult to remember what made you happy in the first place. When you feel this way, completely changing your routine may be helpful. 

If you've been working at a job you hate for years, consider looking for a new position. If you have considered taking a trip, consider booking the ticket and starting a new adventure. If you're not ready to make significant changes, a more immediate task, like changing your bedroom or painting your kitchen a new color, can add some spice to your daily life and contribute to personal development.

Changing something about your daily routine keeps life from becoming stagnant. Another way of bringing about change and improving well-being is to eliminate unnecessary clutter. Consider cleaning out your living area and donating any items you don't need anymore. A clean, organized living space can facilitate an organized state of mind and may improve mental health.

Practice self-love

If you are lonely because you crave validation from another person, consider focusing less on the outside world and your perceived lack of social connectivity and instead practice self-love. Make a list of all the aspects you love about yourself. Do an activity that relaxes you, such as burning incense, taking a long bubble bath, playing calming music, or drinking a cup of tea while reading a book. These tasks may help you refocus and look at your situation in a new light.

Embrace your alone time

In solitude, another person does not influence your daily routine, thoughts, and actions. You don't have to change your plans when you're alone because a significant other has something else in mind. You can eat dessert before dinner every day of the week without anyone criticizing you. You can make decisions on a whim without notifying anyone.

Instead of viewing this solitude as negativity, consider focusing on improving an aspect of yourself or your life that you've wanted to work on. Instead of putting all your energy and time into another person, you can put this effort into improving yourself and making your own life more rewarding. This process could involve your health, finances, spirituality, or career. You can visualize where you want to be five, ten, or fifteen years from now and begin working toward that reality.

Keep yourself occupied

If you're bored and believe you have too much alone time, it might be easy for your mind to wander off into dark territory. Loneliness or sadness may worsen if you're bored. Try keeping yourself occupied by reading a book series, binge-watching your favorite show, or writing a poem. Whatever activity you choose, it may be more productive than doing nothing. 

Escape with music

Loneliness and feeling isolated from society can cause depression for some individuals. Reconnection with yourself using music. Music is a standard go-to solution to escape challenges or relate with others, and it may serve to immerse yourself in a universe of emotion.

Talk to a professional

If you desire to withdraw from those you love or are unsure how to move forward in a challenging moment, it may be helpful to talk to a professional. A therapist can support you and help you understand how to make the most of your solitude. If you are uncomfortable with in-person sessions, you can participate in therapy in a safe environment by signing up for online therapy platforms like BetterHelp. 

More than one study has shown that internet-based therapy can successfully decrease symptoms associated with depression, anxiety, and other mental health conditions. One study published in the Canadian Medical Association Journal found that  individuals experiencing sadness or anxiety were more empowered  after utilizing online therapy resources, particularly compared to in-person treatment. The listed benefits of internet-based therapy included ease of use, cost, and flexibility. 

Online therapy can be an effective means of dealing with loneliness. Unlike traditional office-based therapy, online counseling may offer comfort for shy people. If your loneliness is severe, you can message your therapist using the online platform and receive a response when they are available throughout the week. 

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"Kameron is the best counselor I've ever had. Not only is BetterHelp really convenient for my busy lifestyle, but my counselor is the best. She listens and understands what I'm going through even when I'm terrible at explaining it. She pushes me in a positive way, asking the real hard questions so I can have those moments of self-discovery. She's amazing to work with, and being able to write her and schedule phone or video sessions is so convenient."

Why is spending time with yourself important?

Just as socialization is key to mental and physical health, so is occasional solitude. If you don’t spend time alone, you can be at greater risk of anxiety or depression. Stress can build and also lead to health problems like high blood pressure, a rise in cortisol, and cognitive symptoms like a lack of focus. 

Why do I like spending time with myself?

There are a number of reasons you may enjoy spending time alone. If you are someone who has a job that requires social interaction, taking a break can be essential to recharge. If you are someone who spends a lot of time with other people in any capacity, you may become overstimulated and require alone time. Being alone can help you get to know yourself better, and increase creativity. Enjoying time alone can also indicate that you are comfortable with yourself, and don’t require the constant approval of others. 

What does it mean to spend time with yourself?

Spending time with yourself can be done in a number of ways.  It may not always be comfortable, but it can be valuable. Journaling is a popular way to spend time alone, getting thoughts on paper and sparking creativity. You may also take walks alone, letting the mind go quiet as you observe the world around you. Solo hobbies can also be a good way to spend time with yourself, engaging in activities like arts and crafts, music, or reading. 

Is it okay to spend time by yourself?

Yes, alone time is not only okay, but it can also be essential to health and happiness. Creative people especially require the brain to be “bored” at times to spark new ideas. Stress management becomes difficult if you don’t take the time to recharge your social battery. This may be especially true for people who experience social anxiety. 

Why being alone is powerful?

Being alone allows us to have a break from the pressures of social interaction, work, and other daily stressors. In popular media, a “hustle” mentality is commonly held up as ideal, which comes with a negative stigma on time spent just sitting with yourself doing nothing. There are also massive social pressures around “missing out” on social interactions, and social media posts of people constantly engaging in fun activities lead many people to feel uncomfortable being alone. 

Reclaiming alone time can help strengthen your own self-concept, as you take time to understand your own needs without distraction. Creativity blossoms in periods of boredom, and alone time can be a fertile ground for developing mindfulness skills. 

Does spending time alone make you stronger?

Research suggests that our alone time can help develop resilience. It can also be key to maintaining physical health and mental well-being. 

What is the value of alone time?

While humans are social creatures and thrive on positive relationships, we also require time to be alone. Solitude gives us the opportunity to explore ourselves more thoroughly, gives our minds a much-needed break, sparks creativity, and allows us to manage our stress better. Those who get sufficient time alone may also fall asleep more easily, and subsequently be more mentally resilient. 

What is the value of taking time for yourself?

There are several benefits to spending time alone, including increased creativity, a recharge of social energy, and better personal exploration. 

What do you call a person who likes to be alone?

A person who likes to be alone can be called a solitary person, or in more recent years is often referred to as an introvert. Introverts come in a variety of types, and some are very socially active. Someone who is an introvert simply requires frequent downtime alone to recharge (although even extroverts need this type of downtime as well). 

Why being alone is peaceful?

Being alone allows your mind to rest from social requirements and pressures. Often too, a person spending time alone may do so with a form of physical activity like long walks, which can contribute to a more peaceful state of mind. Forest bathing (spending time in nature, sitting or walking) has been extensively researched and shown to lower cortisol levels and blood pressure. 

• How To Improve Interpersonal Skills: Connecting With Your Community Medically reviewed by Laura Angers Maddox , NCC, LPC
• How To Express Yourself & Overcome Shyness: A Guide Medically reviewed by Laura Angers Maddox , NCC, LPC
• Relationships and Relations

Spending time alone in nature is good for your mental and emotional health

Professor of Outdoor Education, Montreat College

Associate Professor and Program Director of Parks and Recreation Management, Western Carolina University

Associate Professor of Outdoor Education, Montreat College

Disclosure statement

Brad Daniel is Executive Director of 2nd Nature TREC LLC, which provides training, research, education and consulting to various outdoor-oriented organizations. He serves on the Board of the Environmental Educators of North Carolina (EENC), as Chair of the Leadership Team for the Southeastern Environmental Education Alliance (SEEA), and as Co-Chair of the Symposium on Experiential Education Research (SEER) for the Association for Experiential Education (AEE).

Andrew Bobilya is co-founder and director of training and education at 2nd Nature TREC LLC, which provides training, research, education and consulting to various outdoor-oriented organizations. He is Co-chair of the Symposium on Experiential Education Research (SEER) for the Association for Experiential Education (AEE).

Ken Kalisch does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.

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Today Americans live in a world that thrives on being busy, productive and overscheduled. Further, they have developed the technological means to be constantly connected to others and to vast options for information and entertainment through social media. For many, smartphones demand their attention day and night with constant notifications.

As a result, naturally occurring periods of solitude and silence that were once commonplace have been squeezed out of their lives. Music, reality TV shows, YouTube, video games, tweeting and texting are displacing quiet and solitary spaces. Silence and solitude are increasingly viewed as “dead” or “unproductive” time, and being alone makes many Americans uncomfortable and anxious.

But while some equate solitude with loneliness, there is a big difference between being lonely and being alone. The latter is essential for mental health and effective leadership .

We study and teach outdoor education and related fields at several colleges and organizations in North Carolina, through and with other scholars at 2nd Nature TREC, LLC , a training, research, education and consulting firm. We became interested in the broader implications of alone time after studying intentionally designed solitude experiences during wilderness programs, such as those run by Outward Bound . Our findings reveal that time alone in nature is beneficial for many participants in a variety of ways, and is something they wish they had more of in their daily life.

Reflection and challenge

We have conducted research for almost two decades on Outward Bound and undergraduate wilderness programs at Montreat College in North Carolina and Wheaton College in Illinois. For each program, we studied participants’ experiences using multiple methods, including written surveys, focus group interviews, one-on-one interviews and field notes. In some cases, we asked subjects years later to look back and reflect on how the programs had affected them. Among other questions, our research looked at participant perceptions of the value of solo time outdoors .

Our studies showed that people who took part in these programs benefited both from the outdoor settings and from the experience of being alone. These findings build on previous research that has clearly demonstrated the value of spending time in nature.

Scholars in fields including wilderness therapy and environmental psychology have shown that time outdoors benefits our lives in many ways. It has a therapeutic effect , relieves stress and restores attention . Alone time in nature can have a calming effect on the mind because it occurs in beautiful, natural and inspirational settings.

Nature also provides challenges that spur individuals to creative problem-solving and increased self-confidence. For example, some find that being alone in the outdoors, particularly at night, is a challenging situation. Mental, physical and emotional challenges in moderation encourage personal growth that is manifested in an increased comfort with one’s self in the absence of others.

Being alone also can have great value. It can allow issues to surface that people spend energy holding at bay, and offer an opportunity to clarify thoughts, hopes, dreams and desires. It provides time and space for people to step back, evaluate their lives and learn from their experiences. Spending time this way prepares them to re-engage with their community relationships and full work schedules.

Putting it together: The outdoor solo

Participants in programmed wilderness expeditions often experience a component known as “Solo,” a time of intentional solitude lasting approximately 24-72 hours. Extensive research has been conducted on solitude in the outdoors because many wilderness education programs have embraced the educational value of solitude and silence.

Solo often emerges as one of the most significant parts of wilderness programs, for a variety of reasons. Alone time creates a contrasting experience to normal living that enriches people mentally, physically and emotionally. As they examine themselves in relation to nature, others, and in some cases, God, people become more attuned to the important matters in their lives and in the world of which they are part.

Solitary reflection enhances recognition and appreciation of key personal relationships, encourages reorganization of life priorities , and increases appreciation for alone time, silence, and reflection. People learn lessons they want to transfer to their daily living , because they have had the opportunity to clarify, evaluate and redirect themselves by setting goals for the future.

For some participants, time alone outdoors provides opportunity to consider the spiritual and/or religious dimension of life. Reflective time, especially in nature, often enhances spiritual awareness and makes people feel closer to God. Further, it encourages their increased faith and trust in God . This often occurs through providing ample opportunities for prayer, meditation, fasting, Scripture-reading, journaling and reflection time.

Retreating to lead

As Thomas Carlyle has written, “In (solitary) silence, great things fashion themselves together.” Whether these escapes are called alone time, solitude or Solo, it seems clear that humans experience many benefits when they retreat from the “rat race” to a place apart and gather their thoughts in quietness.

In order to live and lead effectively, it is important to be intentional about taking the time for solitary reflection. Otherwise, gaps in schedules will always fill up, and even people with the best intentions may never fully realize the life-giving value of being alone.

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Spending Time Alone Makes You a Better Friend, Partner or Boss, Research Shows

If being by yourself makes you uncomfortable, there are some small steps you can try..

When was the last time you deliberately chose to spend time by yourself, doing something that you enjoyed, or else enjoying the luxury of doing nothing? If it was a long time ago or--worse--you can't remember ever doing that, you should consider changing your habits and making some time to be by yourself. It will help you stay calmer and better handle the emotional ups and downs we all encounter.

There's plenty of evidence that choosing to spend time in solitude has benefits for your mental health. And most people seem to find solitude necessary for real relaxation. In the BBC's " Rest Test ," participants chose from a long list of activities to identify those they found most restful. Some 18,000 people in 134 countries took the test, and reading, an activity usually performed alone, was their number-one choice by a healthy margin. Spending time in nature was number two. And number three actually was spending time alone. What about spending time with friends or family? That was number 12 on the list, just ahead of drinking tea or coffee.

So you probably need to be alone in order to feel really rested. But perhaps more important, research shows that spending time on your own is one of the most effective ways to moderate the ups and downs of your emotions. If you're feeling overwhelmed by feelings of anger, sadness, frustration, or confusion, spending time by yourself is a powerful tool to help you calm down and start feeling like yourself again.

In a series of experiments, researchers at the University of Rochester had hundreds of college students either spend 15 minutes alone or with another person, asking and answering a set of questions that have been shown not to affect mood one way or the other. Before and after the 15-minute session either alone or with a companion, participants filled out a short survey that identified their current emotional state. It turned out that for subjects who had either strongly positive or strongly negative feelings, those feelings partially dissipated during their 15 minutes of alone time. In fact, in an experiment where subjects were asked to spend 15 minutes by themselves and away from such things as smartphones each day for a week, those calmer feelings extended somewhat into the following week when they were no longer assigned to spend time alone. That suggests that regularly spending a little time by yourself can have a lasting effect on your mood.

It also suggests that when you're feeling angry, worried, or frightened, it's a really good idea to take a little time by yourself to process those emotions. It's especially important to do that before you act on your feelings, saying or doing something to your co-worker, friend, spouse, or customer that you might end up regretting later on.

How to spend time by yourself.

What if, like a lot of people, you're unaccustomed to spending time alone and the thought of doing so makes you uncomfortable? It's a shame to miss the many benefits of spending time alone, which, among other things, has been shown to enhance creativity. Rather than give up on alone time, try a few simple activities that might help you enjoy being alone.

First of all, don't do anything you think you won't enjoy, and do your best to make sure that your chosen activity really will be a pleasure for you. As a restorative yoga teacher once said to me, "You're preparing for an extremely fussy guest, and the guest is you." Now might be a good time to splurge on that expensive pumpkin mocha at your favorite cafe, or take the time to go all by yourself to that movie you've been wanting to see. I particularly love going to movies by myself. With no one there to distract me or for me to worry about, I find I get more deeply involved in the story on the screen. 

If that doesn't appeal, try spending some time by yourself in your favorite cafe or restaurant with a journal to write in and/or a book to read. Writing in a journal is one of the best ways there is to smooth out your emotions. Going for a walk, especially if you can do it in a natural setting , is another way you might enjoy being on your own, and that has proven benefits for your health as well. Or, if you can have your home to yourself, you might enjoy staying home alone, working on a solo art project or reading. 

You could do any of these things--or anything else that you find really enjoyable. Perhaps you enjoy fly fishing. Whatever you choose to do make sure to do something all by yourself on a regular basis. You'll end up healthier and happier. And you'll probably be a better friend, co-worker or partner as well.

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Do You Like Spending Time Alone With Your Thoughts?

What do you do to practice mindfulness or wellness? Do you ever go on silent walks?

By Jeremy Engle

What do you do when you need a break from the hustle and bustle of daily life? When you need to recharge your mental and physical batteries? Have you ever gone on a silent walk?

Do you like to spend time alone with your thoughts?

In “ The Beauty of a Silent Walk ,” Christina Caron writes about the simple power of setting one foot in front of the other and taking note of the world around you.

In a TikTok video that has now amassed nearly half a million views, the influencer Mady Maio describes taking a walk. But not just any walk: a silent one. For her, the 30-minute stroll was revelatory. No podcasts, no music. Just “me, myself and I.” She was resistant at first. (It was her boyfriend’s idea.) “My anxiety could never,” she said in the video. Ms. Maio described the first two minutes as mental “mayhem” that eventually gave way to a “flow state.” Her brain fog lifted. Ideas started popping into her head because she was “giving them space to enter.” The silent walk is TikTok’s latest wellness obsession, a blend of meditation and exercise that aims to improve mental health. Unlike the similarly trendy “ hot girl walk ,” a four-mile odyssey that requires goal-setting and giving thanks, the silent walk does not involve multitasking. There is no agenda other than to set one foot in front of the other and take note of the world around you. Walking in silence is an ancient tradition rooted in mindfulness, a form of meditation that helps people focus on the physical sensations, thoughts and emotions of the present moment, without any judgment.

The article explores the benefits of silent walks:

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6 Reasons You Should Spend More Time Alone

Learn the healthy aspects of solitude..

Posted January 31, 2012 | Reviewed by Matt Huston

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• People tend to equate solitude with loneliness, but there are many physical and psychological benefits of spending time alone.
• Spending time alone gives a person the chance to clear their mind, focus, and think more clearly.
• Setting aside time each day to "unplug" from devices can reduce distractions and contribute to productivity.

In today's constantly connected world, finding solitude has become a lost art. We tend to equate a desire for solitude with people who are lonely , sad, or have antisocial tendencies. But seeking solitude can actually be quite healthy. In fact, there are many physical and psychological benefits of spending time alone.

Benefits of Seeking Solitude

• Solitude allows you to reboot your brain and unwind. Constantly being "on" doesn't give your brain a chance to rest and replenish itself. Being by yourself with no distractions gives you the chance to clear your mind, focus, and think more clearly. It's an opportunity to revitalize your mind and body at the same time.
• Solitude helps to improve concentration and increase productivity . When you remove as many distractions and interruptions as you can from your day, you are better able to concentrate, which will help you get more work done in a shorter amount of time.
• Solitude gives you an opportunity to discover yourself and find your own voice. When you're part of a group, you're more likely to go along with what the group is doing or thinking, which aren't always the actions you would take or the decisions you would make if you were on your own.
• Solitude provides time for you to think deeply. Day-to-day responsibilities and commitments can make your to-do list seem as if it has no end. This constant motion prevents you from engaging in deep thought, which inhibits creativity and lessens productivity.
• Solitude helps you work through problems more effectively. It's hard to think of effective solutions to problems when you're distracted by incoming information, regardless of whether the source is electronic or human.
• 6. Solitude can enhance the quality of your relationships with others. By spending time with yourself and gaining a better understanding of who you are and what you desire in life, you're more likely to make better choices about who you want to be around. You also may come to appreciate your relationships more after you've spent some time alone.

How to Create Alone Time

Despite knowing these benefits, it can be a challenge to find time alone in a world that seems to never sleep. Here are a few ideas to help you find more time to spend with yourself.

• Disconnect. Set aside some time each day to unplug from all the ways you connect with others. Turn off your cell phone. Don't use the internet. Turn off your TV. If you use your computer to create, such as by writing, then write without all the bells, dings, and beeps that come along with being connected to the internet. You'll be amazed at how much more you can get done when you're not distracted.
• Get up or Get in Early. Wake up a half hour or an hour earlier than everyone else in your house, and use that time to create, produce, problem solve, meditate, or whatever makes you happy. This strategy also works if you can get to work before everyone else arrives and before the phones begin to ring.
• Close Your Door. It's simple, but can be very effective. A client who owns a community-based magazine puts a sign on her door when she wants alone time. The sign reads "I'm editing or writing. If the police are here, the office is on fire, or George Clooney calls or stops by, you can interrupt me. If not, please hold all questions until my door opens." She said that she decided to put up the sign after she realized that her presence in the office was a stimulus for questions. "Whenever I was in the office," she said, "it seemed like there was one question after the next. I was constantly getting interrupted, and it was hard to get my work done. Then I noticed that on the days I was working on a story outside the office, my phone hardly ever rang, even if I was out the whole day. Apparently, whatever questions came up somehow got handled without me. It made me realize that just by being in the office, I was a magnet for questions. So I put up the sign, and it works like a charm."
• Use Your Lunchtime. Don't spend your lunchtime working at your desk. Don't spend it running errands. And if you regularly go out to lunch, don't think that it always has to be with others. Once a week, or even just a couple of times a month, commit to spending lunch with yourself. Walk. Sit in the sun outside. Go to a park and eat. Enjoy the time you have alone.
• Schedule Solitude. Literally. Mark off time in your day planner or calendar for spending alone with yourself. If you can make time for all the little extras you fit into your day, like stopping at Starbucks or picking up something at the mall, you can schedule time in your calendar for solitude. It doesn't have to be long. Any time that you can spend alone with yourself to reboot, meditate, focus, relax, create, produce, and/or think deeply is better than no time.

In my next post, " Why You Shouldn't Feel Guilty about Stealing a Little Time for Yourself ," I talk about ways to negotiate alone time with friends and family and how to avoid feeling guilty about it. And if you have effective strategies you use to steal a little time for yourself, please share them with readers in the comments section below.

© 2012 Sherrie Bourg Carter , All Rights Reserved

Sherrie Bourg Carter, Psy.D. , psychologist and author of "High Octane Women: How Superachievers Can Avoid Burnout," specializes in the area of women and stress.

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The best way to truly relax and reduce stress is to spend time alone. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

• Paragraph 1 - Introduction
• Sentence 1 - Background statement
• Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
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• Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
• Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
• Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
• Sentence 2 - Example
• Sentence 3 - Discussion
• Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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• Sentence 1 - Summary
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Doctors in many countries say that people do not do enough physical exercises. What are the causes of this trend? How can the situation be improved?

Governments in many countries have recently introduced special taxes on food and beverages with high levels of sugar. some think that these taxes are a good idea while others disagree. discuss both views and give your own opinion., 7.some people think that the increasing use of computers and mobile phones for communication has a negative effect on young people’s reading and writing skills. to what extent do you agree or disagree, while some people like to live at home, other people think that living in an apartment has more advantages. discuss both views., 1.some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Alone or Spending Time by Yourself: IELTS Speaking Part 1 Sample Answer

Updated On Sep 04, 2024

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Ready to know the type of questions asked in the IELTS speaking part 1 topic “ Alone or Spending Time by Yourself ”? Do try these answer ideas to ace the IELTS Speaking part 1 section.

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Speaking part 1.

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The IELTS Speaking Module is designed to assess your English Language Speaking Skills. To ensure a good score in the IELTS Speaking Module, you must study and practice the common Speaking Question types. Below is a sample Speaking Module with responses. By studying the sample answers, you can have a reference to begin drafting your own Speaking section answers.

Let’s start practising with some sample responses to the 'Alone or Spending Time by Yourself' IELTS Speaking Part 1 now!

1 When was the last time you were alone?

https://ieltsmaterial.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/Alone-1.m4a

Last night, I had come from a stressful day of work so I decided to stay in for the entire evening with some Netflix and hot tea. Although I’m kind of a social butterfly (a social person) , I have come to enjoy nights in by myself from time to time. I think all of us need that as a balance.

2 What do you like to do when you are alone?

https://ieltsmaterial.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/Alone-2.m4a

As I’m a tea addict, that’s my number one activity to do alone. Furthermore, I enjoy reading a book or a series on Netflix. I tend to get lost in (to become fully involved in) those two activities. Moreover, I enjoy taking a walk alone around town and people watching (observing strangers) .

3 Do you wish to have more time alone?

https://ieltsmaterial.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/Alone-3.m4a

Definitely not. As I live alone in a studio apartment, I sometimes get lonely, so I take every opportunity to have social interactions to avoid sitting at home alone. I would consider myself a mixture between introvert and extrovert, but definitely leaning more towards extrovert. Although I appreciate my time alone, I certainly don’t crave (have an urge to do) anymore.

4 Is it important to have some time alone?

https://ieltsmaterial.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/Alone-4.m4a

Without a doubt! I think we all need some time alone for self-reflection (thinking about yourself and what you do) . Furthermore, when we spend too much time with people, we tend to get annoyed with them, even take them for granted (not appreciate them) at times. With this said, we all need a break from people to remember just how great they are.

• social butterfly: a social person Eg: My sister is a social butterfly
• get lost in: to become fully involved in Eg: I got lost in the book that I was reading.
• people watching: observing strangers Eg: Faria is busy in people watching
• Crave: have an urge to do Eg: I am craving for some Chinese food
• Self-reflection: thinking about yourself and what you do Eg: One’s manners are self reflected
• take them for granted: not appreciate them Eg: One should not take anything for granted

Also check:

• Describe a Big City You Would Like to Visit - IELTS Cue Card
• Daily Routine - IELTS Speaking Part 1,2,3
• Describe a city you want to live in - IELTS Cue card
• IELTS Speaking Practice test
• Linking words for IELTS Speaking
• IELTS Speaking recent actual test
• Idioms for IELTS Speaking
• IELTS Pronunciation Guide

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Courtney Miller

Courtney is one of our star content writers as she plays multiple roles. She is a phenomenal researcher and provides extensive articles to students. She is also an IELTS Trainer and an extremely good content writer. Courtney completed her English Masters at Kings College London, and has been a part of our team for more than 3 years. She has worked with the British Council and knows the tricks and tips of IELTS.

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