revise essay example

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Steps for Revising Your Paper

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When you have plenty of time to revise, use the time to work on your paper and to take breaks from writing. If you can forget about your draft for a day or two, you may return to it with a fresh outlook. During the revising process, put your writing aside at least twice—once during the first part of the process, when you are reorganizing your work, and once during the second part, when you are polishing and paying attention to details.

Use the following questions to evaluate your drafts. You can use your responses to revise your papers by reorganizing them to make your best points stand out, by adding needed information, by eliminating irrelevant information, and by clarifying sections or sentences.

Find your main point.

What are you trying to say in the paper? In other words, try to summarize your thesis, or main point, and the evidence you are using to support that point. Try to imagine that this paper belongs to someone else. Does the paper have a clear thesis? Do you know what the paper is going to be about?

Identify your readers and your purpose.

What are you trying to do in the paper? In other words, are you trying to argue with the reading, to analyze the reading, to evaluate the reading, to apply the reading to another situation, or to accomplish another goal?

Evaluate your evidence.

Does the body of your paper support your thesis? Do you offer enough evidence to support your claim? If you are using quotations from the text as evidence, did you cite them properly?

Save only the good pieces.

Do all of the ideas relate back to the thesis? Is there anything that doesn't seem to fit? If so, you either need to change your thesis to reflect the idea or cut the idea.

Tighten and clean up your language.

Do all of the ideas in the paper make sense? Are there unclear or confusing ideas or sentences? Read your paper out loud and listen for awkward pauses and unclear ideas. Cut out extra words, vagueness, and misused words.

Visit the Purdue OWL's vidcast on cutting during the revision phase for more help with this task.

Eliminate mistakes in grammar and usage.

Do you see any problems with grammar, punctuation, or spelling? If you think something is wrong, you should make a note of it, even if you don't know how to fix it. You can always talk to a Writing Lab tutor about how to correct errors.

Switch from writer-centered to reader-centered.

Try to detach yourself from what you've written; pretend that you are reviewing someone else's work. What would you say is the most successful part of your paper? Why? How could this part be made even better? What would you say is the least successful part of your paper? Why? How could this part be improved?

Revising Drafts

Rewriting is the essence of writing well—where the game is won or lost. —William Zinsser

What this handout is about

This handout will motivate you to revise your drafts and give you strategies to revise effectively.

What does it mean to revise?

Revision literally means to “see again,” to look at something from a fresh, critical perspective. It is an ongoing process of rethinking the paper: reconsidering your arguments, reviewing your evidence, refining your purpose, reorganizing your presentation, reviving stale prose.

But I thought revision was just fixing the commas and spelling

Nope. That’s called proofreading. It’s an important step before turning your paper in, but if your ideas are predictable, your thesis is weak, and your organization is a mess, then proofreading will just be putting a band-aid on a bullet wound. When you finish revising, that’s the time to proofread. For more information on the subject, see our handout on proofreading .

How about if I just reword things: look for better words, avoid repetition, etc.? Is that revision?

Well, that’s a part of revision called editing. It’s another important final step in polishing your work. But if you haven’t thought through your ideas, then rephrasing them won’t make any difference.

Why is revision important?

Writing is a process of discovery, and you don’t always produce your best stuff when you first get started. So revision is a chance for you to look critically at what you have written to see:

• if it’s really worth saying,
• if it says what you wanted to say, and
• if a reader will understand what you’re saying.

The process

What steps should i use when i begin to revise.

Here are several things to do. But don’t try them all at one time. Instead, focus on two or three main areas during each revision session:

• Wait awhile after you’ve finished a draft before looking at it again. The Roman poet Horace thought one should wait nine years, but that’s a bit much. A day—a few hours even—will work. When you do return to the draft, be honest with yourself, and don’t be lazy. Ask yourself what you really think about the paper.
• As The Scott, Foresman Handbook for Writers puts it, “THINK BIG, don’t tinker” (61). At this stage, you should be concerned with the large issues in the paper, not the commas.
• Check the focus of the paper: Is it appropriate to the assignment? Is the topic too big or too narrow? Do you stay on track through the entire paper?
• Think honestly about your thesis: Do you still agree with it? Should it be modified in light of something you discovered as you wrote the paper? Does it make a sophisticated, provocative point, or does it just say what anyone could say if given the same topic? Does your thesis generalize instead of taking a specific position? Should it be changed altogether? For more information visit our handout on thesis statements .
• Think about your purpose in writing: Does your introduction state clearly what you intend to do? Will your aims be clear to your readers?

What are some other steps I should consider in later stages of the revision process?

• Examine the balance within your paper: Are some parts out of proportion with others? Do you spend too much time on one trivial point and neglect a more important point? Do you give lots of detail early on and then let your points get thinner by the end?
• Check that you have kept your promises to your readers: Does your paper follow through on what the thesis promises? Do you support all the claims in your thesis? Are the tone and formality of the language appropriate for your audience?
• Check the organization: Does your paper follow a pattern that makes sense? Do the transitions move your readers smoothly from one point to the next? Do the topic sentences of each paragraph appropriately introduce what that paragraph is about? Would your paper work better if you moved some things around? For more information visit our handout on reorganizing drafts.
• Check your information: Are all your facts accurate? Are any of your statements misleading? Have you provided enough detail to satisfy readers’ curiosity? Have you cited all your information appropriately?
• Check your conclusion: Does the last paragraph tie the paper together smoothly and end on a stimulating note, or does the paper just die a slow, redundant, lame, or abrupt death?

Whoa! I thought I could just revise in a few minutes

Sorry. You may want to start working on your next paper early so that you have plenty of time for revising. That way you can give yourself some time to come back to look at what you’ve written with a fresh pair of eyes. It’s amazing how something that sounded brilliant the moment you wrote it can prove to be less-than-brilliant when you give it a chance to incubate.

But I don’t want to rewrite my whole paper!

Revision doesn’t necessarily mean rewriting the whole paper. Sometimes it means revising the thesis to match what you’ve discovered while writing. Sometimes it means coming up with stronger arguments to defend your position, or coming up with more vivid examples to illustrate your points. Sometimes it means shifting the order of your paper to help the reader follow your argument, or to change the emphasis of your points. Sometimes it means adding or deleting material for balance or emphasis. And then, sadly, sometimes revision does mean trashing your first draft and starting from scratch. Better that than having the teacher trash your final paper.

But I work so hard on what I write that I can’t afford to throw any of it away

If you want to be a polished writer, then you will eventually find out that you can’t afford NOT to throw stuff away. As writers, we often produce lots of material that needs to be tossed. The idea or metaphor or paragraph that I think is most wonderful and brilliant is often the very thing that confuses my reader or ruins the tone of my piece or interrupts the flow of my argument.Writers must be willing to sacrifice their favorite bits of writing for the good of the piece as a whole. In order to trim things down, though, you first have to have plenty of material on the page. One trick is not to hinder yourself while you are composing the first draft because the more you produce, the more you will have to work with when cutting time comes.

But sometimes I revise as I go

That’s OK. Since writing is a circular process, you don’t do everything in some specific order. Sometimes you write something and then tinker with it before moving on. But be warned: there are two potential problems with revising as you go. One is that if you revise only as you go along, you never get to think of the big picture. The key is still to give yourself enough time to look at the essay as a whole once you’ve finished. Another danger to revising as you go is that you may short-circuit your creativity. If you spend too much time tinkering with what is on the page, you may lose some of what hasn’t yet made it to the page. Here’s a tip: Don’t proofread as you go. You may waste time correcting the commas in a sentence that may end up being cut anyway.

How do I go about the process of revising? Any tips?

• Work from a printed copy; it’s easier on the eyes. Also, problems that seem invisible on the screen somehow tend to show up better on paper.
• Another tip is to read the paper out loud. That’s one way to see how well things flow.
• Remember all those questions listed above? Don’t try to tackle all of them in one draft. Pick a few “agendas” for each draft so that you won’t go mad trying to see, all at once, if you’ve done everything.
• Ask lots of questions and don’t flinch from answering them truthfully. For example, ask if there are opposing viewpoints that you haven’t considered yet.

Whenever I revise, I just make things worse. I do my best work without revising

That’s a common misconception that sometimes arises from fear, sometimes from laziness. The truth is, though, that except for those rare moments of inspiration or genius when the perfect ideas expressed in the perfect words in the perfect order flow gracefully and effortlessly from the mind, all experienced writers revise their work. I wrote six drafts of this handout. Hemingway rewrote the last page of A Farewell to Arms thirty-nine times. If you’re still not convinced, re-read some of your old papers. How do they sound now? What would you revise if you had a chance?

What can get in the way of good revision strategies?

Don’t fall in love with what you have written. If you do, you will be hesitant to change it even if you know it’s not great. Start out with a working thesis, and don’t act like you’re married to it. Instead, act like you’re dating it, seeing if you’re compatible, finding out what it’s like from day to day. If a better thesis comes along, let go of the old one. Also, don’t think of revision as just rewording. It is a chance to look at the entire paper, not just isolated words and sentences.

What happens if I find that I no longer agree with my own point?

If you take revision seriously, sometimes the process will lead you to questions you cannot answer, objections or exceptions to your thesis, cases that don’t fit, loose ends or contradictions that just won’t go away. If this happens (and it will if you think long enough), then you have several choices. You could choose to ignore the loose ends and hope your reader doesn’t notice them, but that’s risky. You could change your thesis completely to fit your new understanding of the issue, or you could adjust your thesis slightly to accommodate the new ideas. Or you could simply acknowledge the contradictions and show why your main point still holds up in spite of them. Most readers know there are no easy answers, so they may be annoyed if you give them a thesis and try to claim that it is always true with no exceptions no matter what.

How do I get really good at revising?

The same way you get really good at golf, piano, or a video game—do it often. Take revision seriously, be disciplined, and set high standards for yourself. Here are three more tips:

• The more you produce, the more you can cut.
• The more you can imagine yourself as a reader looking at this for the first time, the easier it will be to spot potential problems.
• The more you demand of yourself in terms of clarity and elegance, the more clear and elegant your writing will be.

How do I revise at the sentence level?

Read your paper out loud, sentence by sentence, and follow Peter Elbow’s advice: “Look for places where you stumble or get lost in the middle of a sentence. These are obvious awkwardness’s that need fixing. Look for places where you get distracted or even bored—where you cannot concentrate. These are places where you probably lost focus or concentration in your writing. Cut through the extra words or vagueness or digression; get back to the energy. Listen even for the tiniest jerk or stumble in your reading, the tiniest lessening of your energy or focus or concentration as you say the words . . . A sentence should be alive” (Writing with Power 135).

Practical advice for ensuring that your sentences are alive:

• Use forceful verbs—replace long verb phrases with a more specific verb. For example, replace “She argues for the importance of the idea” with “She defends the idea.”
• Look for places where you’ve used the same word or phrase twice or more in consecutive sentences and look for alternative ways to say the same thing OR for ways to combine the two sentences.
• Cut as many prepositional phrases as you can without losing your meaning. For instance, the following sentence, “There are several examples of the issue of integrity in Huck Finn,” would be much better this way, “Huck Finn repeatedly addresses the issue of integrity.”
• Check your sentence variety. If more than two sentences in a row start the same way (with a subject followed by a verb, for example), then try using a different sentence pattern.
• Aim for precision in word choice. Don’t settle for the best word you can think of at the moment—use a thesaurus (along with a dictionary) to search for the word that says exactly what you want to say.
• Look for sentences that start with “It is” or “There are” and see if you can revise them to be more active and engaging.
• For more information, please visit our handouts on word choice and style .

How can technology help?

Need some help revising? Take advantage of the revision and versioning features available in modern word processors.

Track your changes. Most word processors and writing tools include a feature that allows you to keep your changes visible until you’re ready to accept them. Using “Track Changes” mode in Word or “Suggesting” mode in Google Docs, for example, allows you to make changes without committing to them.

Compare drafts. Tools that allow you to compare multiple drafts give you the chance to visually track changes over time. Try “File History” or “Compare Documents” modes in Google Doc, Word, and Scrivener to retrieve old drafts, identify changes you’ve made over time, or help you keep a bigger picture in mind as you revise.

Works consulted

We consulted these works while writing this handout. This is not a comprehensive list of resources on the handout’s topic, and we encourage you to do your own research to find additional publications. Please do not use this list as a model for the format of your own reference list, as it may not match the citation style you are using. For guidance on formatting citations, please see the UNC Libraries citation tutorial . We revise these tips periodically and welcome feedback.

Anson, Chris M., and Robert A. Schwegler. 2010. The Longman Handbook for Writers and Readers , 6th ed. New York: Longman.

Elbow, Peter. 1998. Writing With Power: Techniques for Mastering the Writing Process . New York: Oxford University Press.

Lanham, Richard A. 2006. Revising Prose , 5th ed. New York: Pearson Longman.

Lunsford, Andrea A. 2015. The St. Martin’s Handbook , 8th ed. Boston: Bedford/St Martin’s.

Ruszkiewicz, John J., Christy Friend, Daniel Seward, and Maxine Hairston. 2010. The Scott, Foresman Handbook for Writers , 9th ed. Boston: Pearson Education.

Zinsser, William. 2001. On Writing Well: The Classic Guide to Writing Nonfiction , 6th ed. New York: Quill.

You may reproduce it for non-commercial use if you use the entire handout and attribute the source: The Writing Center, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill

Want to create or adapt books like this? Learn more about how Pressbooks supports open publishing practices.

8.4 Revising and Editing

Learning objectives.

• Identify major areas of concern in the draft essay during revising and editing.
• Use peer reviews and editing checklists to assist revising and editing.
• Revise and edit the first draft of your essay and produce a final draft.

Revising and editing are the two tasks you undertake to significantly improve your essay. Both are very important elements of the writing process. You may think that a completed first draft means little improvement is needed. However, even experienced writers need to improve their drafts and rely on peers during revising and editing. You may know that athletes miss catches, fumble balls, or overshoot goals. Dancers forget steps, turn too slowly, or miss beats. For both athletes and dancers, the more they practice, the stronger their performance will become. Web designers seek better images, a more clever design, or a more appealing background for their web pages. Writing has the same capacity to profit from improvement and revision.

Understanding the Purpose of Revising and Editing

Revising and editing allow you to examine two important aspects of your writing separately, so that you can give each task your undivided attention.

• When you revise , you take a second look at your ideas. You might add, cut, move, or change information in order to make your ideas clearer, more accurate, more interesting, or more convincing.
• When you edit , you take a second look at how you expressed your ideas. You add or change words. You fix any problems in grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure. You improve your writing style. You make your essay into a polished, mature piece of writing, the end product of your best efforts.

How do you get the best out of your revisions and editing? Here are some strategies that writers have developed to look at their first drafts from a fresh perspective. Try them over the course of this semester; then keep using the ones that bring results.

• Take a break. You are proud of what you wrote, but you might be too close to it to make changes. Set aside your writing for a few hours or even a day until you can look at it objectively.
• Ask someone you trust for feedback and constructive criticism.
• Pretend you are one of your readers. Are you satisfied or dissatisfied? Why?
• Use the resources that your college provides. Find out where your school’s writing lab is located and ask about the assistance they provide online and in person.

Many people hear the words critic , critical , and criticism and pick up only negative vibes that provoke feelings that make them blush, grumble, or shout. However, as a writer and a thinker, you need to learn to be critical of yourself in a positive way and have high expectations for your work. You also need to train your eye and trust your ability to fix what needs fixing. For this, you need to teach yourself where to look.

Creating Unity and Coherence

Following your outline closely offers you a reasonable guarantee that your writing will stay on purpose and not drift away from the controlling idea. However, when writers are rushed, are tired, or cannot find the right words, their writing may become less than they want it to be. Their writing may no longer be clear and concise, and they may be adding information that is not needed to develop the main idea.

When a piece of writing has unity , all the ideas in each paragraph and in the entire essay clearly belong and are arranged in an order that makes logical sense. When the writing has coherence , the ideas flow smoothly. The wording clearly indicates how one idea leads to another within a paragraph and from paragraph to paragraph.

Reading your writing aloud will often help you find problems with unity and coherence. Listen for the clarity and flow of your ideas. Identify places where you find yourself confused, and write a note to yourself about possible fixes.

Creating Unity

Sometimes writers get caught up in the moment and cannot resist a good digression. Even though you might enjoy such detours when you chat with friends, unplanned digressions usually harm a piece of writing.

Mariah stayed close to her outline when she drafted the three body paragraphs of her essay she tentatively titled “Digital Technology: The Newest and the Best at What Price?” But a recent shopping trip for an HDTV upset her enough that she digressed from the main topic of her third paragraph and included comments about the sales staff at the electronics store she visited. When she revised her essay, she deleted the off-topic sentences that affected the unity of the paragraph.

Read the following paragraph twice, the first time without Mariah’s changes, and the second time with them.

Nothing is more confusing to me than choosing among televisions. It confuses lots of people who want a new high-definition digital television (HDTV) with a large screen to watch sports and DVDs on. You could listen to the guys in the electronics store, but word has it they know little more than you do. They want to sell what they have in stock, not what best fits your needs. You face decisions you never had to make with the old, bulky picture-tube televisions. Screen resolution means the number of horizontal scan lines the screen can show. This resolution is often 1080p, or full HD, or 768p. The trouble is that if you have a smaller screen, 32 inches or 37 inches diagonal, you won’t be able to tell the difference with the naked eye. The 1080p televisions cost more, though, so those are what the salespeople want you to buy. They get bigger commissions. The other important decision you face as you walk around the sales floor is whether to get a plasma screen or an LCD screen. Now here the salespeople may finally give you decent info. Plasma flat-panel television screens can be much larger in diameter than their LCD rivals. Plasma screens show truer blacks and can be viewed at a wider angle than current LCD screens. But be careful and tell the salesperson you have budget constraints. Large flat-panel plasma screens are much more expensive than flat-screen LCD models. Don’t let someone make you by more television than you need!

Answer the following two questions about Mariah’s paragraph:

Collaboration

Please share with a classmate and compare your answers.

• Now start to revise the first draft of the essay you wrote in Section 8 “Writing Your Own First Draft” . Reread it to find any statements that affect the unity of your writing. Decide how best to revise.

When you reread your writing to find revisions to make, look for each type of problem in a separate sweep. Read it straight through once to locate any problems with unity. Read it straight through a second time to find problems with coherence. You may follow this same practice during many stages of the writing process.

Writing at Work

Many companies hire copyeditors and proofreaders to help them produce the cleanest possible final drafts of large writing projects. Copyeditors are responsible for suggesting revisions and style changes; proofreaders check documents for any errors in capitalization, spelling, and punctuation that have crept in. Many times, these tasks are done on a freelance basis, with one freelancer working for a variety of clients.

Creating Coherence

Careful writers use transitions to clarify how the ideas in their sentences and paragraphs are related. These words and phrases help the writing flow smoothly. Adding transitions is not the only way to improve coherence, but they are often useful and give a mature feel to your essays. Table 8.3 “Common Transitional Words and Phrases” groups many common transitions according to their purpose.

Table 8.3 Common Transitional Words and Phrases

After Maria revised for unity, she next examined her paragraph about televisions to check for coherence. She looked for places where she needed to add a transition or perhaps reword the text to make the flow of ideas clear. In the version that follows, she has already deleted the sentences that were off topic.

Many writers make their revisions on a printed copy and then transfer them to the version on-screen. They conventionally use a small arrow called a caret (^) to show where to insert an addition or correction.

1. Answer the following questions about Mariah’s revised paragraph.

2. Now return to the first draft of the essay you wrote in Section 8 “Writing Your Own First Draft” and revise it for coherence. Add transition words and phrases where they are needed, and make any other changes that are needed to improve the flow and connection between ideas.

Being Clear and Concise

Some writers are very methodical and painstaking when they write a first draft. Other writers unleash a lot of words in order to get out all that they feel they need to say. Do either of these composing styles match your style? Or is your composing style somewhere in between? No matter which description best fits you, the first draft of almost every piece of writing, no matter its author, can be made clearer and more concise.

If you have a tendency to write too much, you will need to look for unnecessary words. If you have a tendency to be vague or imprecise in your wording, you will need to find specific words to replace any overly general language.

Identifying Wordiness

Sometimes writers use too many words when fewer words will appeal more to their audience and better fit their purpose. Here are some common examples of wordiness to look for in your draft. Eliminating wordiness helps all readers, because it makes your ideas clear, direct, and straightforward.

Sentences that begin with There is or There are .

Wordy: There are two major experiments that the Biology Department sponsors.

Revised: The Biology Department sponsors two major experiments.

Sentences with unnecessary modifiers.

Wordy: Two extremely famous and well-known consumer advocates spoke eloquently in favor of the proposed important legislation.

Revised: Two well-known consumer advocates spoke in favor of the proposed legislation.

Sentences with deadwood phrases that add little to the meaning. Be judicious when you use phrases such as in terms of , with a mind to , on the subject of , as to whether or not , more or less , as far as…is concerned , and similar expressions. You can usually find a more straightforward way to state your point.

Wordy: As a world leader in the field of green technology, the company plans to focus its efforts in the area of geothermal energy.

A report as to whether or not to use geysers as an energy source is in the process of preparation.

Revised: As a world leader in green technology, the company plans to focus on geothermal energy.

A report about using geysers as an energy source is in preparation.

Sentences in the passive voice or with forms of the verb to be . Sentences with passive-voice verbs often create confusion, because the subject of the sentence does not perform an action. Sentences are clearer when the subject of the sentence performs the action and is followed by a strong verb. Use strong active-voice verbs in place of forms of to be , which can lead to wordiness. Avoid passive voice when you can.

Wordy: It might perhaps be said that using a GPS device is something that is a benefit to drivers who have a poor sense of direction.

Revised: Using a GPS device benefits drivers who have a poor sense of direction.

Sentences with constructions that can be shortened.

Wordy: The e-book reader, which is a recent invention, may become as commonplace as the cell phone.

My over-sixty uncle bought an e-book reader, and his wife bought an e-book reader, too.

Revised: The e-book reader, a recent invention, may become as commonplace as the cell phone.

My over-sixty uncle and his wife both bought e-book readers.

Now return once more to the first draft of the essay you have been revising. Check it for unnecessary words. Try making your sentences as concise as they can be.

Choosing Specific, Appropriate Words

Most college essays should be written in formal English suitable for an academic situation. Follow these principles to be sure that your word choice is appropriate. For more information about word choice, see Chapter 4 “Working with Words: Which Word Is Right?” .

• Avoid slang. Find alternatives to bummer , kewl , and rad .
• Avoid language that is overly casual. Write about “men and women” rather than “girls and guys” unless you are trying to create a specific effect. A formal tone calls for formal language.
• Avoid contractions. Use do not in place of don’t , I am in place of I’m , have not in place of haven’t , and so on. Contractions are considered casual speech.
• Avoid clichés. Overused expressions such as green with envy , face the music , better late than never , and similar expressions are empty of meaning and may not appeal to your audience.
• Be careful when you use words that sound alike but have different meanings. Some examples are allusion/illusion , complement/compliment , council/counsel , concurrent/consecutive , founder/flounder , and historic/historical . When in doubt, check a dictionary.
• Choose words with the connotations you want. Choosing a word for its connotations is as important in formal essay writing as it is in all kinds of writing. Compare the positive connotations of the word proud and the negative connotations of arrogant and conceited .
• Use specific words rather than overly general words. Find synonyms for thing , people , nice , good , bad , interesting , and other vague words. Or use specific details to make your exact meaning clear.

Now read the revisions Mariah made to make her third paragraph clearer and more concise. She has already incorporated the changes she made to improve unity and coherence.

1. Answer the following questions about Mariah’s revised paragraph:

2. Now return once more to your essay in progress. Read carefully for problems with word choice. Be sure that your draft is written in formal language and that your word choice is specific and appropriate.

Completing a Peer Review

After working so closely with a piece of writing, writers often need to step back and ask for a more objective reader. What writers most need is feedback from readers who can respond only to the words on the page. When they are ready, writers show their drafts to someone they respect and who can give an honest response about its strengths and weaknesses.

You, too, can ask a peer to read your draft when it is ready. After evaluating the feedback and assessing what is most helpful, the reader’s feedback will help you when you revise your draft. This process is called peer review .

You can work with a partner in your class and identify specific ways to strengthen each other’s essays. Although you may be uncomfortable sharing your writing at first, remember that each writer is working toward the same goal: a final draft that fits the audience and the purpose. Maintaining a positive attitude when providing feedback will put you and your partner at ease. The box that follows provides a useful framework for the peer review session.

Questions for Peer Review

Title of essay: ____________________________________________

Date: ____________________________________________

Writer’s name: ____________________________________________

Peer reviewer’s name: _________________________________________

• This essay is about____________________________________________.
• Your main points in this essay are____________________________________________.
• What I most liked about this essay is____________________________________________.

These three points struck me as your strongest:

These places in your essay are not clear to me:

a. Where: ____________________________________________

Needs improvement because__________________________________________

b. Where: ____________________________________________

Needs improvement because ____________________________________________

c. Where: ____________________________________________

The one additional change you could make that would improve this essay significantly is ____________________________________________.

One of the reasons why word-processing programs build in a reviewing feature is that workgroups have become a common feature in many businesses. Writing is often collaborative, and the members of a workgroup and their supervisors often critique group members’ work and offer feedback that will lead to a better final product.

Exchange essays with a classmate and complete a peer review of each other’s draft in progress. Remember to give positive feedback and to be courteous and polite in your responses. Focus on providing one positive comment and one question for more information to the author.

Using Feedback Objectively

The purpose of peer feedback is to receive constructive criticism of your essay. Your peer reviewer is your first real audience, and you have the opportunity to learn what confuses and delights a reader so that you can improve your work before sharing the final draft with a wider audience (or your intended audience).

It may not be necessary to incorporate every recommendation your peer reviewer makes. However, if you start to observe a pattern in the responses you receive from peer reviewers, you might want to take that feedback into consideration in future assignments. For example, if you read consistent comments about a need for more research, then you may want to consider including more research in future assignments.

Using Feedback from Multiple Sources

You might get feedback from more than one reader as you share different stages of your revised draft. In this situation, you may receive feedback from readers who do not understand the assignment or who lack your involvement with and enthusiasm for it.

You need to evaluate the responses you receive according to two important criteria:

• Determine if the feedback supports the purpose of the assignment.
• Determine if the suggested revisions are appropriate to the audience.

Then, using these standards, accept or reject revision feedback.

Work with two partners. Go back to Note 8.81 “Exercise 4” in this lesson and compare your responses to Activity A, about Mariah’s paragraph, with your partners’. Recall Mariah’s purpose for writing and her audience. Then, working individually, list where you agree and where you disagree about revision needs.

Editing Your Draft

If you have been incorporating each set of revisions as Mariah has, you have produced multiple drafts of your writing. So far, all your changes have been content changes. Perhaps with the help of peer feedback, you have made sure that you sufficiently supported your ideas. You have checked for problems with unity and coherence. You have examined your essay for word choice, revising to cut unnecessary words and to replace weak wording with specific and appropriate wording.

The next step after revising the content is editing. When you edit, you examine the surface features of your text. You examine your spelling, grammar, usage, and punctuation. You also make sure you use the proper format when creating your finished assignment.

Editing often takes time. Budgeting time into the writing process allows you to complete additional edits after revising. Editing and proofreading your writing helps you create a finished work that represents your best efforts. Here are a few more tips to remember about your readers:

• Readers do not notice correct spelling, but they do notice misspellings.
• Readers look past your sentences to get to your ideas—unless the sentences are awkward, poorly constructed, and frustrating to read.
• Readers notice when every sentence has the same rhythm as every other sentence, with no variety.
• Readers do not cheer when you use there , their , and they’re correctly, but they notice when you do not.
• Readers will notice the care with which you handled your assignment and your attention to detail in the delivery of an error-free document..

The first section of this book offers a useful review of grammar, mechanics, and usage. Use it to help you eliminate major errors in your writing and refine your understanding of the conventions of language. Do not hesitate to ask for help, too, from peer tutors in your academic department or in the college’s writing lab. In the meantime, use the checklist to help you edit your writing.

Editing Your Writing

• Are some sentences actually sentence fragments?
• Are some sentences run-on sentences? How can I correct them?
• Do some sentences need conjunctions between independent clauses?
• Does every verb agree with its subject?
• Is every verb in the correct tense?
• Are tense forms, especially for irregular verbs, written correctly?
• Have I used subject, object, and possessive personal pronouns correctly?
• Have I used who and whom correctly?
• Is the antecedent of every pronoun clear?
• Do all personal pronouns agree with their antecedents?
• Have I used the correct comparative and superlative forms of adjectives and adverbs?
• Is it clear which word a participial phrase modifies, or is it a dangling modifier?

Sentence Structure

• Are all my sentences simple sentences, or do I vary my sentence structure?
• Have I chosen the best coordinating or subordinating conjunctions to join clauses?
• Have I created long, overpacked sentences that should be shortened for clarity?
• Do I see any mistakes in parallel structure?

Punctuation

• Does every sentence end with the correct end punctuation?
• Can I justify the use of every exclamation point?
• Have I used apostrophes correctly to write all singular and plural possessive forms?
• Have I used quotation marks correctly?

Mechanics and Usage

• Can I find any spelling errors? How can I correct them?
• Have I used capital letters where they are needed?
• Have I written abbreviations, where allowed, correctly?
• Can I find any errors in the use of commonly confused words, such as to / too / two ?

Be careful about relying too much on spelling checkers and grammar checkers. A spelling checker cannot recognize that you meant to write principle but wrote principal instead. A grammar checker often queries constructions that are perfectly correct. The program does not understand your meaning; it makes its check against a general set of formulas that might not apply in each instance. If you use a grammar checker, accept the suggestions that make sense, but consider why the suggestions came up.

Proofreading requires patience; it is very easy to read past a mistake. Set your paper aside for at least a few hours, if not a day or more, so your mind will rest. Some professional proofreaders read a text backward so they can concentrate on spelling and punctuation. Another helpful technique is to slowly read a paper aloud, paying attention to every word, letter, and punctuation mark.

If you need additional proofreading help, ask a reliable friend, a classmate, or a peer tutor to make a final pass on your paper to look for anything you missed.

Remember to use proper format when creating your finished assignment. Sometimes an instructor, a department, or a college will require students to follow specific instructions on titles, margins, page numbers, or the location of the writer’s name. These requirements may be more detailed and rigid for research projects and term papers, which often observe the American Psychological Association (APA) or Modern Language Association (MLA) style guides, especially when citations of sources are included.

To ensure the format is correct and follows any specific instructions, make a final check before you submit an assignment.

With the help of the checklist, edit and proofread your essay.

Key Takeaways

• Revising and editing are the stages of the writing process in which you improve your work before producing a final draft.
• During revising, you add, cut, move, or change information in order to improve content.
• During editing, you take a second look at the words and sentences you used to express your ideas and fix any problems in grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure.
• Unity in writing means that all the ideas in each paragraph and in the entire essay clearly belong together and are arranged in an order that makes logical sense.
• Coherence in writing means that the writer’s wording clearly indicates how one idea leads to another within a paragraph and between paragraphs.
• Transitional words and phrases effectively make writing more coherent.
• Writing should be clear and concise, with no unnecessary words.
• Effective formal writing uses specific, appropriate words and avoids slang, contractions, clichés, and overly general words.
• Peer reviews, done properly, can give writers objective feedback about their writing. It is the writer’s responsibility to evaluate the results of peer reviews and incorporate only useful feedback.
• Remember to budget time for careful editing and proofreading. Use all available resources, including editing checklists, peer editing, and your institution’s writing lab, to improve your editing skills.

Writing for Success Copyright © 2015 by University of Minnesota is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License , except where otherwise noted.

The Writing Process

Making expository writing less stressful, more efficient, and more enlightening, search form, step 4: revise.

"Rewriting is the essence of writing well: it's where the game is won or lost." —William Zinsser, On Writing Well

What does it really mean to revise, and why is a it a separate step from editing? Look at the parts of the word revise : The prefix re- means again or anew , and – vise comes from the same root as vision —i.e., to see. Thus revising is "re-seeing" your paper in a new way. That is why revising here refers to improving the global structure and content of your paper, its organization and ideas , not grammar, spelling, and punctuation. That comes last.

Logically, we also revise before we edit because revising will most certainly mean adding and deleting and rewriting sentences and often entire paragraphs . And there is no sense in editing text that you are going to cut or editing and then adding material and having to edit again.

Continue to step-by-step instructions for revising .

An Essay Revision Checklist

Guidelines for Revising a Composition

Maica / Getty Images

• Ph.D., Rhetoric and English, University of Georgia
• M.A., Modern English and American Literature, University of Leicester
• B.A., English, State University of New York

Revision  means looking again at what we have written to see how we can improve it. Some of us start revising as soon as we begin a rough  draft —restructuring and rearranging sentences as we work out our ideas. Then we return to the draft, perhaps several times, to make further revisions.

Revision as Opportunity

Revising is an opportunity to reconsider our topic, our readers, even our purpose for writing . Taking the time to rethink our approach may encourage us to make major changes in the content and structure of our work.

As a general rule, the best time to revise is not right after you've completed a draft (although at times this is unavoidable). Instead, wait a few hours—even a day or two, if possible—in order to gain some distance from your work. This way you'll be less protective of your writing and better prepared to make changes. 

One last bit of advice: read your work aloud when you revise. You may hear problems in your writing that you can't see.

"Never think that what you've written can't be improved. You should always try to make the sentence that much better and make a scene that much clearer. Go over and over the words and reshape them as many times as is needed," (Tracy Chevalier, "Why I Write." The Guardian , 24 Nov. 2006).

Revision Checklist

• Does the essay have a clear and concise main idea? Is this idea made clear to the reader in a thesis statement early in the essay (usually in the introduction )?
• Does the essay have a specific purpose (such as to inform, entertain, evaluate, or persuade)? Have you made this purpose clear to the reader?
• Does the introduction create interest in the topic and make your audience want to read on?
• Is there a clear plan and sense of organization to the essay? Does each paragraph develop logically from the previous one?
• Is each paragraph clearly related to the main idea of the essay? Is there enough information in the essay to support the main idea?
• Is the main point of each paragraph clear? Is each point adequately and clearly defined in a topic sentence and supported with specific details ?
• Are there clear transitions from one paragraph to the next? Have key words and ideas been given proper emphasis in the sentences and paragraphs?
• Are the sentences clear and direct? Can they be understood on the first reading? Are the sentences varied in length and structure? Could any sentences be improved by combining or restructuring them?
• Are the words in the essay clear and precise? Does the essay maintain a consistent tone ?
• Does the essay have an effective conclusion —one that emphasizes the main idea and provides a sense of completeness?

Once you have finished revising your essay, you can turn your attention to the finer details of editing and proofreading your work.

Line Editing Checklist

• Is each sentence  clear and complete ?
• Can any short, choppy sentences be improved by  combining  them?
• Can any long, awkward sentences be improved by breaking them down into shorter units and recombining them?
• Can any wordy sentences be made more  concise ?
• Can any  run-on sentences  be more effectively  coordinated  or  subordinated ?
• Does  each verb agree with its subject ?
• Are all  verb  forms correct and consistent?
• Do  pronouns  refer clearly to the appropriate  nouns ?
• Do all  modifying words and phrases  refer clearly to the words they are intended to modify?
• Is each word  spelled  correctly?
• Is the  punctuation  correct?
• Practice in Making a Simple Outline for a Cause & Effect Paragraph
• Essay Assignment: Descriptive and Informative Profile
• Writing an Opinion Essay
• Make Your Paragraphs Flow to Improve Writing
• Overused and Tired Words
• 501 Topic Suggestions for Writing Essays and Speeches
• How to Write a Good Thesis Statement
• Examples of Great Introductory Paragraphs
• The Ultimate Guide to the 5-Paragraph Essay
• What Is Expository Writing?
• Understanding What an Expository Essay Is
• Venn Diagrams to Plan Essays and More
• Write an Attention-Grabbing Opening Sentence for an Essay
• Tips on How to Write an Argumentative Essay
• 100 Persuasive Essay Topics
• 50 Argumentative Essay Topics

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Writing Center

How to revise drafts, now the real work begins....

After writing the first draft of an essay, you may think much of your work is done, but actually the real work – revising – is just beginning. The good news is that by this point in the writing process you have gained some perspective and can ask yourself some questions: Did I develop my subject matter appropriately? Did my thesis change or evolve during writing? Did I communicate my ideas effectively and clearly? Would I like to revise, but feel uncertain about how to do it?

Also see the UMN Crookston Writing Center's  Revising and Editing Handout .

How to Revise

First, put your draft aside for a little while.  Time away from your essay will allow for more objective self-evaluation. When you do return to the draft, be honest with yourself; ask yourself what you really think about the paper.

Check the  focus  of the paper.  Is it appropriate to the assignment prompt? Is the topic too big or too narrow? Do you stay on track throughout the entire paper? (At this stage, you should be concerned with the large, content-related issues in the paper, not the grammar and sentence structure).

Get  feedback .  Since you already know what you’re trying to say, you aren’t always the best judge of where your draft is clear or unclear. Let another reader tell you. Then discuss aloud what you were trying to achieve. In articulating for someone else what you meant to argue, you will clarify ideas for yourself.

Think honestly about your thesis.  Do you still agree with it? Should it be modified in light of something you discovered as you wrote the paper? Does it make a sophisticated, provocative point? Or does it just say what anyone could say if given the same topic? Does your thesis generalize instead of taking a specific position? Should it be changed completely?

Examine the  balance  within your paper.  Are some parts out of proportion with others? Do you spend too much time on one trivial point and neglect a more important point? Do you give lots of details early on and then let your points get thinner by the end? Based on what you did in the previous step, restructure your argument: reorder your points and cut anything that’s irrelevant or redundant. You may want to return to your sources for additional supporting evidence.

Now that you know what you’re really arguing, work on your  introduction and conclusion . Make sure to begin your paragraphs with topic sentences, linking the idea(s) in each paragraph to those proposed in the thesis.

Proofread.  Aim for precision and economy in language. Read aloud so you can hear imperfections. (Your ear may pick up what your eye has missed). Note that this step comes LAST. There’s no point in making a sentence grammatically perfect if it’s going to be changed or deleted anyway.

As you revise your own work, keep the following in mind:

Revision means rethinking your thesis. It is unreasonable to expect to come up with the best thesis possible – one that accounts for all aspects of your topic – before beginning a draft, or even during a first draft. The best theses evolve; they are actually produced during the writing process. Successful revision involves bringing your thesis into focus—or changing it altogether.

Revision means making structural changes. Drafting is usually a process of discovering an idea or argument. Your argument will not become clearer if you only tinker with individual sentences. Successful revision involves bringing the strongest ideas to the front of the essay, reordering the main points, and cutting irrelevant sections. It also involves making the argument’s structure visible by strengthening topic sentences and transitions.

Revision takes time. Avoid shortcuts: the reward for sustained effort is an essay that is clearer, more persuasive, and more sophisticated.

Think about your purpose in writing: Does your introduction clearly state what you intend to do? Will your aims be clear to your readers?

Check the organization. Does your paper follow a pattern that makes sense? Doe the transitions move your readers smoothly from one point to the next? Do the topic sentences of each paragraph appropriately introduce what that paragraph is about? Would your paper be work better if you moved some things around?

Check your information. Are all your facts accurate? Are any of our statements misleading? Have you provided enough detail to satisfy readers’ curiosity? Have you cited all your information appropriately?

Revision doesn’t necessarily mean rewriting the whole paper. Sometimes it means revising the thesis to match what you’ve discovered while writing. Sometimes it means coming up with stronger arguments to defend your position, or coming up with more vivid examples to illustrate your points. Sometimes it means shifting the order of your paper to help the reader follow your argument, or to change the emphasis of your points. Sometimes it means adding or deleting material for balance or emphasis. And then, sadly, sometimes revision does mean trashing your first draft and starting from scratch. Better that than having the teacher trash your final paper.

Revising Sentences

Read your paper out loud, sentence by sentence, and look for places where you stumble or get lost in the middle of a sentence. These are obvious places that need fixing. Look for places where you get distracted or even bored – where you cannot concentrate. These are places where you probably lost focus or concentration in your writing. Cut through the extra words or vagueness or digression: get back to the energy.

Tips for writing good sentences:

Use forceful verbs – replace long verb phrases with a more specific verb. For example, replace “She argues for the importance of the idea” with ‘she defends the idea.” Also, try to stay in the active voice.

Look for places where you’ve used the same word or phrase twice or more in consecutive sentences and look for alternative ways to say the same thing OR for ways to combine the two sentences.

Cut as many prepositional phrases as you can without losing your meaning. For instance, the sentence “There are several examples of the issue of integrity in  Huck Finn ” would be much better this way: “ Huck Finn  repeated addresses the issue of integrity.”

Check your sentence variety. IF more than two sentences in a row start the same way (with a subject followed by a verb, for example), then try using a different sentence pattern. Also, try to mix simple sentences with compound and compound-complex sentences for variety.

Aim for precision in word choice. Don’t settle for the best word you can think of at the moment—use a thesaurus (along with a dictionary) to search for the word that says exactly what you want to say.

Look for sentences that start with “it is” or “there are” and see if you can revise them to be more active and engaging.

By Jocelyn Rolling, English Instructor Last edited October 2016 by Allison Haas, M.A.

Editing and Revising

Writing is a process, and an integral part of that process is revision. Revision is best thought of as re-vision or re-seeing: looking at a text from a new perspective, which means re-thinking even its most fundamental precepts. This might involve reconsidering your position on a controversial topic, re-evaluating the quality of the evidence used to support your claims, or re-defining your audience and or purpose.

Editing is a little bit like cleaning up the kitchen after cooking a big meal. Your essay’s “cleanliness” includes smooth transitions between paragraphs, logical organization of your thoughts and presentation of information, overall clarity, proper documentation for sources used in the writing, and effective language usage (standard grammar, punctuation, and spelling).

Revising and editing are inextricably connected. A text must be both revised and edited well in order to be successful. If an essay, for example, is revised extensively, but not edited, problems such as grammar errors will make the essay’s meaning difficult to comprehend and stand in the way of its success.

The reverse is also true. Consider the poor writer who tirelessly edits an essay whose ideas are not fully formed. The result is a very polished text—perfect grammar, clear sentence structures, no spelling errors—that no one can comprehend, despite its orderliness, because its basic meaning is unclear, undeveloped, or unsubstantiated.

The Revision Process

After you have written a complete draft having a beginning, middle, and end, it’s time to re-see what you’ve written and think about what you’ve said, how you’ve said it, and why. Believe it or not, revising can be fun. You’ve already chosen your topic, defined its scope, conveyed your thesis, presented your information or position, supported your claims with evidence (which might have required a great deal of research), addressed potential counter-arguments, and arrived at a satisfying conclusion. That’s a lot of work, starting from scratch, getting over the terror of the blank page, and committing your thoughts to paper. You’ve already done the hard work. Now it’s time to read, re-read, review, reflect, and revise.

The revision process is recursive, which means that writers will go through several stages of the process at different times .

One method of revision is the post-draft outline. It helps you identify the organization of your writing so that you can improve it.

Post-Draft Outlining

This revision strategy requires you to outline a draft that you have already completed. This breaks down the essay into its parts to allow you to see if your organization is sound, if you have repeated your points, whether your introduction and/or conclusion need work, if there are points you need to make that you haven’t yet, etc. A good way to set this up is to count the paragraphs in your draft and write that many numbers on a separate piece of paper like this:

Then in one sentence, as briefly as possible, state the point of each paragraph. You are not looking for the topic sentence. You are trying to boil down what the paragraph is about. If your topic sentence actually reflects what the paragraph is about, that’s fine. It should, just don’t trust that it will. If it doesn’t, you will want to revise it.

A possible outlined draft (this one for a paper on homeschooling) might look something like this:

• Parents want what’s best for their children: Is homeschooling best?
• (Introduction)
• Homeschooling is growing for many reasons (religious, etc.).
• Homeschooling gives parents the freedom to set the educational environment
• (Activities, peers, etc.).
• Not all children need to be homeschooled, but children should have that option
• (Conclusion).

This is a clear outline, and so it indicates that the paper is strong in terms of organization. The reader can tell that distinct points are being made in the paper, that the paper is logically organized, and that there is a clear introduction and conclusion. This outline is for a very short paper (six paragraphs), but the same process can be applied to longer texts.

Now consider this outline, written for a different paper, also on homeschooling:

• Two groups of homeschoolers: religious and other
• Can’t get religion in school
• Parents want to pass on their faith to their children
• Homeschools put kids at disadvantage—no state/federal guidelines
• What do you think about the paper this outline was written from?
• What sense do you get from paragraphs two and three about the big point the author is trying to make?
• Is the author against homeschooling? For it?
• Can you identify a thesis here? What is the paper’s main point?

If you are struggling, you should be: This outline shows that the paper has several problems.

First, as readers, we think we will be reading a paper about two types of homeschoolers, religious and other, as described in the first paragraph. However, in the remainder of the paragraphs the author only discusses religious homeschoolers. As readers, we have to shift gears: Now we think the paper is going to be about why religious parents might want to homeschool their kids.

And then, all of a sudden, we are hit with the idea that homeschooling harms children.

Quite likely, this author did not recognize the disorganization of the paper, or that they had changed the angle on the topic, the central focus, several times. When writers are too close to their own work (which is almost always), it is easy to overlook that information is missing or misplaced. We’ve all started writing and ended up wandering, digressing beyond the point of no return. We can be forgiven for that—but outlining totally strips down the essay, so we can see its bare bones, meaning that even though we are close to the work, we can readily identify its strengths and weaknesses.

You can also apply outlining to a single paragraph, rather than a whole paper.

Let’s look at this one:

Many people are unaware of a growing trend in American society. This trend is parents taking the initiative and dedication towards ensuring that their children are given a quality education. Homeschooled children are growing in numbers every year. It’s clear that there are many advantages to having children learn at home.

This paragraph has five sentences, so your outline will have five points. When you summarize sentences, do it in as few words as possible:

• Growing trend in U.S.
• Trend = parents want a good education for children
• Solution = homeschool
• Homeschooled children increasing in number each year
• Why? Many advantages…

This outline shows a clear logical progression from point 1 to point 2 and so on. This outline demonstrates that the above is a well-constructed paragraph.

Now it’s your turn to practice. Below you will find a paragraph. Grab a piece of scrap paper and outline it sentence by sentence:

Homeschooling is often associated with two groups: religious and non-religious. Religious groups want their children to embrace their religion. To this end they take them to church on Sunday, involve them in church activities during the week, and teach them from the scripture. Religious homeschoolers want to be in charge of their children’s education while emphasizing their belief in religion. Religion and education are mixed together to build the children’s character, morals, and values. Religion is the faith that they hold above anything else. Religion is a subject that they can’t receive at public schools.

Here is one possible outline of this paragraph:

• Homeschooling = religious and non-religious groups
• Want kids to have religion
• Have religious activities all week
• Parents in charge of education and religion
• Both mixed is good for child
• Religion very important
• Can’t get it in school
• What do you think about this paragraph?
• Is it structured like the last paragraph we looked at?
• What are the similarities and differences between them?

It’s repetitive (paragraphs two and six say roughly the same thing), and it uses the word religion/religious too many times (nine times). Also, the topic sentence suggests that the paragraph is going to talk about two groups (religious and not), but it only talks about one.

• How could this paragraph be revised?
• Would reordering the sentences help?
• What about changing the topic to just religious homeschooling?

There are countless ways to revise this paragraph; your choices will depend on the focus that you, the author, want to take.

Here’s one attempt at revising this paragraph:

While parents choose to homeschool for several reasons, many do so to instill their religious beliefs in their children. By homeschooling, they are able to involve their children in church activities and teach them from the scripture throughout the week. This gives parents the opportunity to shape both their children’s religious and academic education, thereby building in their children a strong moral character. Given that religion cannot be received in the public schools, homeschooling allows these parents the ability to pass on their faith.

Note how many of the “religion” words were removed, without changing the focus of the topic, which is a religious angle on homeschooling. This makes the paragraph less repetitive.

The focus has also been changed from two homeschooling groups to just religious homeschooling. In other words, now the topic sentence fits the paragraph.

Paramedic Method of Revision

The Paramedic Method of Revision is a technique that targets wordiness and helps streamline your writing so it is clear and concise. To start, we will need to review prepositions (See Table 1 for examples). A good test that identifies most prepositions is whether they can fit into the following sentence:

The squirrel ran ___ the tree (up, over, with, under, around, at, below, from, to).

Prepositions

Is “president” a preposition? What about “and” or “this”? Why not? “The squirrel ran this the tree” is not a possible sentence. Neither is “The squirrel ran president the tree” or “The squirrel ran and the tree.” See how this test helps us to identify prepositions? “President,” “this,” and “and” do not fit into that blank, and so we know that they are not prepositions.

One note: There are a few prepositions that sound a bit odd in this sentence (for example, of), but they are prepositions just the same.

The next thing we need to identify are forms of the verbs, “to be” and “to have.”

These verbs are really common and have many forms. For instance, “being” and “is,” “had” and “having”—can you think of other forms of these verbs?

Here are some more:

BE: was, were, wasn’t, am, are, been, be

HAVE: has, hasn’t, hadn’t, have

With our memories jogged about prepositions and the verb forms of “to be” and “to have,” we can now look at the Paramedic Method of Revision , which involves a series of steps:

Step 1. Identify Overused Prepositions and Vague or Passive Be and Have Verbs

Identify all the forms of “to be” and “to have” (is, were, being, to be, had, having, hasn’t, etc…):

• The little girl was found safe at the mall down the street after having been declared missing for ten days.

Now you try

• The dog was having too much fun when his owners were away from home.

Here’s the answer

Next, identify all the prepositions, like this:

• The dog with the black spots on his back lives over the tracks from my house.

Now you try one. Identify all the prepositions:

• Go over the bridge, down Main Street, up Markham Blvd, and turn into the third driveway.
• So at this point in the revision strategy, we’ve marked all the versions of “to be” (was, were, am, be,…), “to have” (have, had, having, has, ….) and the prepositions (from, to, over, under, around, below,…), like this:

The latest book of the month is a fascinating gem which will be cherished for years.

Step 2: Revise Identified Words

Try to delete the highlighted words. How? First, insert verbs that actually do something:

• “I am a race-car driver” -> “I drive race cars.”

Often, you will find the verb you need (in this case “drive”) posing as an adjective or noun (in this case “driver”) somewhere in the sentence. Find it and make it a verb.

How do you revise the overuse of prepositions? Well, often, prepositions are acting as adjectives, so make them into one. How would you change this: “The boy with the blue hair”?

• “The boy with the blue hair” -> “The blue-haired boy.”

The result is junk-free writing, real words carrying real meaning. There’s an added bonus here too. It has been proven in psychological tests that the clearer the writing, the more people understand it (i.e. the fewer unnecessary words). By using this technique, your point will be clearer.

There’s nothing wrong with prepositions, or the verb form of BE and HAVE. The problem is that most writing is packed full of them, which can create unspecific meanings. Give some other words a chance, and express yourself with more accuracy and intent.

Let’s go back to one of our earlier examples. Try to re-write this sentence, getting rid of as many of the marked words as possible:

• The little girl was found safe at the mall down the street after being declared missing for ten days.

What’s the problem? For starters, there are lots of prepositional phrases. Did you notice a waltzing rhythm as you were reading? At the mall, down the street, … It’s also a passive sentence, meaning that there’s no real subject for the verb “found.” Who found her? We don’t know from this sentence because it is passive, but when you’re the author, you should make sure this information is known. For this example, let’s say the police found the girl.

Here’s one revision:

• Police discovered the little girl safe ten days later at the local mall.

Solution : active verb, no more distracting rhythm.

Let’s look at another example. First identify the BE/HAVE forms and the prepositions:

• They had an argument at the house of their neighbor.

Here’s the marked-up version:

Is there a hidden verb lurking somewhere that could replace “had”?

How about “argument”?

Couldn’t we change this to “argued”?

Here’s our first revision:

• They argued at the house of their neighbor. Now, can we do anything about those prepositions? We may not be able to get rid of both, but we can get rid of one:
• They argued at their neighbor’s house.

We started with a ten-word sentence and revised it to a clean six words. How’s that for eliminating wordiness?

Reading your essay aloud is perhaps the single-most effective way to revise it. It’s an especially effective method for those writers who fear they don’t have good command of basic writing principles because all you have to do is listen–hear what the sentence sounds like. This encourages you to revise the sentence as you would speak it, and since most of us speak well, even if we have writing problems, it’s a way of addressing problems that we wouldn’t otherwise likely identify or know how to correct.

Now the twist: Read your paper backwards, starting with the last sentence first, then the next-to-last, etc. This seemingly odd suggestion is a useful one because reading your essay backwards dissociates each sentence from the larger meaning of the text, enabling you to focus just on the sentence and whether or not it makes sense on its own. Because the basic unit of each paragraph is the sentence, you want to make sure that each sentence you write is capable of standing on its own in terms of meaning and clarity. If you discover a sentence that doesn’t make sense on its own, in isolation from its context, then chances are it won’t make sense in the context of your paragraph (and, hence, your paper) either.

After you’ve made changes to sentences that need revision, read your paper aloud again, this time straight through from top to bottom. Listen to the sentences as if you were listening to music. Does anything sound clunky? Monotonous? Redundant? This will give you a chance not only to revise individual words, but also to revise for sound. This is a very good way to improve sentence variety. For example, if you have three sentences in a row that are roughly the same length (which sounds monotonous when you read them aloud), try combining two of them to make one longer sentence. The result is two sentences of different lengths, which will make for a more pleasant reading experience for your audience.

Take a Break From Writing

This sounds like yet another easy assignment. It is, but only if you haven’t procrastinated much and have left enough time between writing your draft and submitting your final essay to take a break from your paper.

Most writers are too close to what they have written to effectively revise it, and putting your work aside for several days give you a chance to create some distance from what you’ve written, allowing you to return to it, even a few short days later, with fresh eyes.

Your Readers and Your Thesis

Have you kept your promise to your readers? A thesis is a lot like a promise, a promise you make to your readers about the journey your essay will take them on. You likely started thinking about your thesis long before you began drafting your essay, and at that point it was tentative. As you gathered information, researched your topic, and crafted a compelling angle, your thesis changed according to the direction your draft was taking at every stage.

Then came time to commit. In your rough draft, you had to stake your claim. The next step was to get comments from your instructor and peer reviewers in your class. Their critical commentary helped you think about ways to improve your essay.

You’ve diligently applied the above revision methods to your paper. But did your thesis get the full attention it deserves?

The thesis is one of the most important parts of any text. It is a one- or two-sentences passage that describes your essay’s main point, as well as its purpose. Your thesis answers the question that is implied by your desire to write the paper. Hence, the above analogy to a promise made to your readers. Your thesis lets readers know what your paper will discuss, and why—and if it’s a persuasive essay, your thesis also lets your readers know by what means you’ve come to the conclusions you have, i.e., why you hold the position you do, the evidence that has led you there.

The Editing Process

Now that you’ve revised your work, you have a collection of ideas you’re proud of, in a form that seems logical. What could possibly be left to do? Oh, yes, the aforementioned “clean-up.”

Don’t let your best ideas become obscured by sloppy writing. Editing is the last act you will perform on your essay before you submit it for evaluation. Take your time, and don’t underestimate the importance of this part of the process! Leave at least one whole work session (an hour or two at least, depending on the length of your essay).

Running spell-check and grammar-check does not constitute editing. You can do these things, but be aware that there are likely a number of spelling, punctuation and grammar errors that the automated programs will not catch.

Here are some ways to make sure you turn in your paper in the best shape possible:

Read Aloud Part 2

Reading your essay aloud, whether to a specific person or just to yourself, is useful for both revision and editing. The value this gesture potentially brings to editing is that it allows you to hear, literally, all kinds of problems with language. You might now know, for example, that the subject and verb of a sentence disagree, but you can hear if something sounds awry. Take this simple example:

• One of the doors are open.

Reading this sentence aloud, you can tell immediately that it doesn’t sound right. Why? You probably thought, perhaps unconsciously that “doors” is the subject of the sentence, so you wrote “doors are open.” But, in fact, “one” is the subject of the sentence, and it’s singular, so the verb must follow:

• One of the doors is open.

Chances are you could correct this sentence without even naming the problem. The other aspect of your essay that reading aloud can help with is identifying unnecessary and vague words and phrases. If your sentence sounds like a mouthful it probably is! Can you say what you’re trying to say in fewer words? Try re-working an especially long sentence to see if you can communicate your intended meaning more succinctly.

If you notice that some of your sentences use “I” or “in my view,” be especially careful to make sure that what you are offering is more than just your opinion. In an informative piece, this might be a fact; in a persuasive piece, this might be an argument that is supported with evidence gathered in your research.

Vague language is one of the most common problems with rough drafts. After all, you know what you mean. Read aloud for overly general, non-specific language. Here’s an example, taken from a thesis statement:’

• My essay will explain my views on capital punishment.

This is vague because it says nothing about what your views are, or why you hold them.

Consider this revised statement: – Capital punishment is unjust because it fails to deter crime.

Your reader will know your position and know why you hold it. What follows is the (correct) assumption that your paper will be an argument against capital punishment.

Many writers also want to add that there are pros and cons to their arguments, advantages and disadvantages, and while this impulse is understandable (and may be helpful to you in the draft stage), it doesn’t typically advance your thesis—and because you are taking a position on a controversial topic, readers will assume there are inherent pros and cons. The best strategy is to name, very specifically, the chief positions being debated. An example using the above topic, capital punishment, might look like this:

Some lawmakers have argued that capital punishment deters crime, while other stakeholders, including victims’ families, hold that incarceration is just as effective at deterrence as the death penalty.

When you are editing your essay, make sure that your words are as precise as they can be. Don’t say “people” when you mean “residents of Delaware County who pay taxes.” Don’t hesitate to use a thesaurus if you think your word choice could use improvement, but you can’t think of the most precise word.

Check for Redundancy

As you are reading aloud, be aware of any passages that sound monotonous or sing-songy. This is a sign that you are on your way to lulling your readers to sleep with repetitive sentence patterns. An easy way to correct this is to combine shorter sentences to make one longer sentence, as well as to break up long sentences into two shorter sentences. Sentence combining allows you to combine sentences that are closely related in order to enhance clarity, underscore connections among ideas, and reduce choppiness. Look through your draft for sentences that are explanation or connection.

Remember: Punctuation changes always change the rhythm of a sentence—just make sure that new punctuation doesn’t get in the way of what you’re trying to say.

Here’s an example of several sentences that could be improved by this method: – Olin loves to play tennis. He doesn’t like wearing traditional “tennis whites.” He prefers tournaments that allow players to wear bright colors on the court.

Edited version: – Olin loves to play tennis, but he doesn’t like wearing traditional “tennis whites”; he prefers tournaments that allow players to wear bright colors on the court.

Check out the APA Style’s tips on avoiding redundancy too .

Avoid Clichés

Writers often resort to clichés as a kind of short-cut to meaning, especially if they think the reader will “get” the intended meaning; however, the meaning of a cliché is subjective–”it’s raining cats and dogs” will not mean the same amount of rain to everyone, and the meaning of a cliché is also rooted in cultural knowledge; not all readers will understand it. Clichés are therefore not appropriate for academic and professional writing that aims to be specific and inclusive.

Examples of Cliches

Guidelines for Unbiased Language

When writing about people, whether they are the authors you are citing in your paper, the subjects you are studying in your research, or any individual or group of people, inclusive language is key to connecting with your readers without alienating anyone. Since the 1960s, the pronoun phrases “he or she,” “his or her,” and “him or her” have been used for referring to an unidentified person. Yet “he or she” assumes all people self-identify as either male or female while ignoring those who potentially self-identify as transgender and gender-nonconforming. These students would use “ze” or “they” as their pronouns. Using unbiased language therefore means avoiding use of “he or she” or any other binary phrasing such as “the opposite sex” that implies there are only two genders, excluding all others.

Using the specific “identified pronoun” for your readers is important. If you are writing to one person or about one person whom you know identifies as “she,” “he,” “ze,” or “they,” use the specific identified pronoun for your specific audience. However, in many academic and professional writing situations, the audience will be people you do not know personally. To write inclusively therefore means using a non-binary, gender neutral pronoun: they/their/them.

For example, the sentence “Students sharpen their pencils” is both grammatically correct and gender-neutral. Click a topic below for more information about “Singular They” and other tutorials on using unbiased language from the Publication Manual of the American Psychological Association , (7th ed.):

Singular They

Avoid Over-Quoting

Quoting refers to using a source without altering it in any way; passages are used from a source word-for-word. In college writing, quotations are used sparingly since too many quotations can make a paper sound like a summary of another person’s work rather than your original work. Your own ideas can become diluted in a sea of other authors’ words with too many quotes. Quotations additionally include quotation marks and in-text citations, which can slow down the reading. Quotations also interject another author’s voice in your paper, and the switch from your voice to another’s can also slow down the reading.

Guidelines for When to Quote

• When you are critiquing or agreeing with someone’s exact words. For instance, if you wanted to argue that a movie reviewer’s comments were biased, you would want to quote the exact words of the reviewer, so your reader would understand your comment.
• When you want to include dialogue in your paper. For example, if you wanted to highlight a point someone made in an interview, you would want to quote the exact words spoken in the interview.
• When the original author’s words are so eloquent, profound, or unique (such as research results) that you cannot find a way to paraphrase and maintain the same meaning or impact of the original passage, you would want to quote those words.

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How to revise your college essay

A step-by-step guide for revising your college essay.

Bonus Material:   PrepMaven’s 30 College Essays That Worked

You’re been diligently working on putting together your college application essays, and now you’ve finally sat down and typed out a full, 650-word Common App essay. So… you’re done, right?

Alas, not quite. 

The good news is you’ve done the hardest bit–the first draft. 

The bad news? If you’re seriously planning to wow college admissions officers at top schools with your application essay, you’ve still got a lot of work to do on the personal essay itself. 

At PrepMaven, we’ve helped countless students perfect their admissions essays and earn acceptances to some of the most selective colleges. What did all of those successful college applications have in common? The application essay always went through many, many revisions and redrafts. 

In this post, we’re going to break down the process by which you can revise the early drafts of your college admissions essay, turning it into a successful, polished essay that’ll convince admissions committees that you deserve a spot. 

In the free link below, you can find 30 real sample essays: all finished products that have undergone the rigorous revision process we’re going to outline for you later in the post. 

Download 30 College Essays that Worked

Jump to section: How big a deal is revision, really? The five stages of revision Stage 1: Big picture and content Stage 2: Organization Stage 3: Style and language Stage 4: Pruning Stage 5: Proofreading Next steps

How big a deal is revision, really?

No beating around the bush: when it comes to the college admissions process, essay revision is basically mandatory. 

We’ve never–not once–seen a first draft that wouldn’t benefit from being redrafted, tweaked, or polished. Even if your first draft is really, really good, revisions will help make it great, maybe even perfect. 

And when we say revision, we don’t just mean going through and changing a few words or catching some grammar mistakes. Revision means significantly rewriting or reorganizing portions of your essay. It might mean cutting whole paragraphs and replacing them; it might mean taking what you thought would be an introduction and making it part of the body; it might even mean keeping the basic ideas but changing just about everything else. 

Revision will also always mean working on things like sentence structure and word choice, but these are actually more like the finishing touches. Much of your earlier revision work is going to include making big changes, and our guide will walk you through how to do exactly that. 

The five stages of revision

We think it’s most helpful to think about college essay revision/editing in five stages: 

• Big picture/content
• Organization
• Style/language
• Proofreading 

Each of these stages means looking at different elements of your essay, and each stage involves asking specific questions about what’s working and what isn’t. 

This all presumes you have a first or rough draft already. If you’re just starting the college application process or the essay,then be sure to check out our posts on brainstorming and topic selection , essay structures , and essay beginnings and endings. 

Stage 1: Big picture/content

When people think of revision, they often jump right to looking for grammar mistakes or messing around with word choice and sentence structure. Usually, that ends up being a big waste of time. 

Why? Because, if you’re doing revision right , you’ll be rewriting large portions of your essay to ensure that the fundamental pieces (the content and the organizations) are perfect. There’s really no reason to waste time making all the sentences sound pretty when, odds are, you’ll be totally changing lots of those sentences anyway. 

So, the first stage of revision should always mean looking at the big picture–by which we really just mean the actual content of your essay. 

Here are the key questions to ask yourself in the first stage of revision: 

• What do you want this entire essay to tell the admissions committee about you?
• What parts of this essay are absolutely necessary to get that central idea across? 
• What parts of this essay are unnecessary to that central idea?

It’s only three questions, but these are big questions that deserve careful attention. If you want to understand what kinds of topics are good responses to question 1, we’d really recommend you consult our post on topic selection here. 

Once you’ve concretely identified the answer to 1, identify what in your essay is fundamentally necessary for it to work. These ideas will be the backbone of your essay; you will likely still edit and reorganize them in further drafts, but you won’t cut them out entirely

Say, for example, the central idea is that your experiences growing up in a town marked by gross wealth disparities have made you determined to combat economic inequality. In that essay, the “backbone” you identify in the first editing stage might be a vivid example of this wealth disparity, a narrative of your understanding of it developed as you grew, and a final discussion of how and why it has shaped your current goals. 

These are things that probably need to be kept for the story to make sense. 

You’ll next want to identify anything that doesn’t connect meaningfully to the central idea. 

In the hypothetical example above, maybe the student had a paragraph or two about athletic struggles or their passion for some extracurricular. If those ideas aren’t necessary for the essay’s main takeaway, they should be cut. You only have, in most cases, 650 words: if you want to put together a detailed, polished personal statement, you just won’t have room for any ideas that aren’t necessary. 

We want to be clear that when we say “necessary” and “unnecessary” here, we’re talking about ideas and large elements of your draft, not any individual sentence or detail. Obviously, there’s lots of details that aren’t “necessary” for the main story, but the purpose of this stage isn’t to focus on those. 

Instead, your goal should simply be to find your essay’s backbone, and ensure there aren’t large sections of your personal statement dedicated to discussing something tangential. 

Your second draft should cut out all these unnecessary ideas while retaining the necessary ones. Reread this second draft (after taking some time away from it) and ask yourself the same questions. If everything in this second draft is necessary, proceed to Stage 2. If not, repeat what you did for Stage 1. 

Note: these initial drafts should be near or over word count. If you find you’ve cut out so much that you’re down below 600 words, that means you’ll also have to add more content to those necessary “backbone” sections. 

Click the link below for 30 essays that mastered the big picture elements, and see how every part of each essay works together. 

Stage 2: Organization

Now that you have the necessary parts of your essay all in one place, you want to organize them in the way that’s most conducive to telling your story to admissions officers. 

Check out our guides on intros and conclusions for some guidance that can help with those sections, and read through our collection of essays that worked to see what a well organized essay looks like. 

The fundamental questions you want to ask here:

• Does the essay start in a way that sets up the main idea without giving too much away?
• Does each paragraph flow smoothly from the preceding one?
• Does each paragraph clearly describe a specific moment or articulate a specific point?
• Does the first sentence of each paragraph make clear what direction the paragraph is going?
• Does the essay end in a way that captures the main idea without feeling repetitive or unnecessary?

As you can maybe tell by the increased number of questions, this stage is tricky, and will likely take multiple drafts. A poorly organized essay–no matter how good the content–will be basically unreadable, so this stage is worth taking your time with. 

Because good organization can be tough to pull off, it’s also probably a good idea to call in an expert at this point–our college essay coaches can read through your essay and tell you right off the bat if it’s organized properly or not. 

For questions 1 and 5, the best resources on what makes a good intro or good ending are our blog posts, linked above. 

For the body paragraphs, there are several techniques you can use to ensure proper flow:

• Short paragraphs are almost always best. Each paragraph should convey one crucial thing–a part of the story, a train of thought. If you see an opportunity to jump to a new paragraph, take it. Shorter paragraphs almost always help make things easier to read. 
• Each paragraph should begin with something like a “topic sentence,” though not a stiff, formal one like you’d have in English class. The first sentence of each paragraph should clue the reader in on what the paragraph will be about without summarizing . 
• Each paragraph should build on the previous one, developing your story and reflection. In other words, each paragraph should only make sense in one place–once your essay is well-organized, it should be impossible to move a paragraph without profoundly changing the essay. 

It’s not easy work, but it’s crucial. As usual, your best friends here are taking time away from the essay, reading it aloud, and getting a second opinion. After you take your first stab at reorganization, give the essay a day. Then, read it aloud to someone you trust (like a PrepMaven essay coach, maybe) and ask them whether the story it tells makes sense. 

As with Stage 1, don’t worry about pretty language or grammar here. The goal of this stage is to take the pieces you’ve settled on and arrange them in a way that works. 

Stage 3: Style and Language

Once you’ve gotten through stages 1 and 2, then you should start focusing on prettying up the language. 

It’s crucial that you lock down content and organization before getting to this stage, or you risk wasting a lot of time. So, to be safe, give your essay a few more read-throughs and ensure the fundamental story you’re telling makes sense and flow. If it does, then it’s time to make the thing sound good.

• Read it aloud. Does your essay sound like it has a distinct, personal voice?
• Does your essay use words that are formal, complicated, or unnatural to you?
• Does your essay use words that are unvaried, boring, generic?
• Are you showing, or telling?

These questions are crucial from a writing standpoint: if you want your essay to actually be a strong piece of writing that’s enjoyable to read, you need to get the right answers here. 

Of course, this can be difficult and feel subjective, especially if you don’t do much creative writing. Although by far the best way to work through these questions is with a writing expert by your side who can help you polish your writing, these questions can take you a long way. 

Most of these questions are really getting at the same thing: your essay needs to read and sound like something unique, something that captures your voice. It’s often easiest to get there by first identifying what you don’t want the college essay to be. 

It shouldn’t sound like the kind of analytical or formal essay you’ve written for English classes in high school. That’s why you don’t want to use any kind of stiff, thesaurus-y language and big, fancy transitions. 

At the same time, it shouldn’t sound like your stream of consciousness or a diary entry. You want the language to be interesting, compelling. You’re not just writing for yourself here, so you need to make it sound good. 

The best way to sum up the ideal tone for most college essays is something like this: imagine you’re trying to tell an interesting story to someone you don’t know very well, maybe at a party or something like that. You wouldn’t want to sound like someone from the nineteenth century, using fancy or old words for the sake of it. At the same time, you would want to keep the language engaging enough that you don’t lose their attention.

That’s where the now infamous advice of “show, don’t tell” comes in. You’ve probably heard that advice from just about every college counselor and English teacher, but we should break down what it actually means. What’s “showing” look like?

Simply put, it’s about telling a story rich with detail before making any broad or abstract claims about yourself. “Telling” would look something like: “I’ve always loved spending time with my grandfather.” “Showing” would instead mean actually describing how you spent time with your grandfather, what you did together, and how you felt in the moment. 

Or, to take another example: “I felt incredibly nervous” is a classic example of plain old telling. But you can make that same idea much more engaging by “showing:” “I tried to wipe my clammy palms on my pant legs, hoping nobody would notice the tremor in my voice. Oh God, I was up next. ”

It’s not that you can never “tell” in your essay. But you can never just tell: anything you want to tell us, you’ve first got to show us. 

Stage 3 takes a while, but it can be fun. At this point, you shouldn’t be changing any ideas or organization in your essay. Each draft will just play around with the sentences, the word choice, and the details. And each draft should sound, when you read it aloud, just a little bit more interesting, more unique, more you than the last one. 

Take a look at the 30 essays below which worked to get students into schools like Princeton: each has a different style, but note how descriptive and vivid each essay is!

Stage 4: Pruning

Once you’ve finished Stage 3–meaning that now everything looks and sounds how you want it to–take a look at the word count. If you’re at or below 650, great; skip directly to Stage 5. 

If not, the next stage is all about simply cutting for length. While we don’t recommend worrying about word count much until this stage, you should do your best to keep a general eye on it through earlier stages to make sure your essay isn’t ballooning to crazy proportions. By the time you get to stage 4, you should really be at 800 words or less–anything over that means you’ve included too much content. 

This process will depend on just how much over word count your essay is. If you’re within 50 words, you’d be surprised at how much space you can save by simply cutting a word or two out of your sentences. It might sting a bit to get rid of an adjective you’ve fallen in love with, but remember that nobody but you will ever know that word was in there. 

Generally, you can cut anywhere from 50-75 words without actually getting rid of whole sentences. That being said, if you’ve tried that and are still over word count, that means it’s time to judiciously remove or drastically shorten a few sentences. 

Do you have a list of three examples? Cut it down to two, or one. Do you have two sentences that could be combined into one? Do it. Ultimately, this’ll come down to what details, words, and turns of phrase you really want to keep, and which you’re willing to sacrifice. 

The most important thing is really not to panic or worry too much about word count early on. Within reason, you should include everything the story needs to work and all the details you think make it unique. When you get to Stage 5, start by looking with a careful eye for any word or phrase you can get rid of, and you’ll usually be able to free up all the room you need.

Stage 5: Proofreading

Almost there: you’ve got your essay in beautiful, polished shape. Now, you just need to proofread for grammatical, spelling, or typographical errors. This very last stage can be a quick one, but deserves to be taken seriously. 

Our advice: 

• Identify and fix any grammar errors. 
• Print the essay.
• Using a pen or highlighter, identify any weird spacing, typos, misplaced commas, etc. 
• Fix those on your typed document.
• Repeat. 

Nothing stings more than submitting the perfect essay only to reread it later and find an embarrassing typo. One won’t sink your application–even college admissions officers misspell things–but a few can make you seem careless. 

That’s why we really stress printing out the document and going over it multiple times on paper. Once you get really used to seeing it on the screen, it can be hard to catch tiny mistakes. By printing it out and looking at it in a different medium, you’ll be far less likely to let something slip. 

A note on the grammar: this can be tricky, especially if you’re not a grammar expert yourself. While Google Docs and Word can be helpful and catch the occasional grammar mistake, they are absolutely not perfect. In fact, I’ve seen them suggest “revisions” that were grammatically incorrect. 

If you’re not 100% confident in your grammar knowledge, that’s another area where one of our essay tutors can be a huge help. They are grammar experts, and they’ll be able to make sure there aren’t any embarrassing mistakes tarnishing your final product. 

Revision is a tough, long process. But by following this step-by-step guide, you can maximize your time and efficiency. Each stage in this process is absolutely crucial if you want to create a successful college essay, which is all the more important given the stakes of the college application process. 

If you’re not quite at the revision stage yet, look at our other posts linked below, all of which tackle different elements of the college essay process. 

If you want to look at samples of final, fully-revised essays, click on the link below to download 30 free, real college essay samples. 

Happy revising!

Top College Essay Posts

• 14 Best College Essay Services for 2024 (40 Services Reviewed)
• Qualities of a Successful College Essay
• 11 College Essays That Worked
• How to Answer the UC Personal Insight Questions
• How Colleges Read your College Applications (A 4-Step Process)
• How to Write the Princeton Supplemental Essays
• The Diamond Strategy: How We Help Students Write College Essays that Get Them Into Princeton (And Other Ivy League Schools)
• What is the College Essay? Your Complete Guide for 202 4
• College Essay Brainstorming: Where to Start
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• How to Format Your College Essay

Mike is a PhD candidate studying English literature at Duke University. Mike is an expert test prep tutor (SAT/ACT/LSAT) and college essay consultant. Nearly all of Mike’s SAT/ACT students score in the top 5% of test takers; many even score above 1500 on the SAT. His college essay students routinely earn admission into their top-choice schools, including Harvard, Brown, and Dartmouth. And his LSAT students have been accepted In into the top law schools in the country, including Harvard, Yale, and Columbia Law.

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Encyclopedia

Writing with artificial intelligence, structured revision – how to revise your work.

• © 2023 by Joseph M. Moxley - Professor of English - USF , Julie Staggers - Washington State University

Learn how to revise your writing in a strategic, professional manner Use structured revision practices to revise your work in a strategic, professional manner.  Learn about why structured revision is so useful to teams & collaborative writing.

• Table of Contents

Related Concepts: What is Academic Dishonesty? ; Academic Writing – How to Write for the Academic Community ; Editing ; Plagiarism ; Proofreading ; Revision ; Rhetorical Analysis ; Rhetorical Reasoning ; Rhetorical Stance ; Standard Written English ; Style

Structured Revision – How to Revise

Some situations require substantive revision whereas others require moderate or light revision. For instance,

• if you are writing an essay for class and it constitutes a major part of your grade, then you may need to spend considerable time revising it
• if you are writing a proposal to a client for a big job, you know you cannot rest until your writing demonstrates that you understand the clients’ perspective
• if you are writing an email to a friend, your discourse is likely to be more informal than if you are writing to an academic or professional audience .

Because every situation is difficult, there is no one single way to revise documents. However, this doesn’t mean you need to treat every writing task as if it’s a space walk. There are, in practice, a number of discourse conventions that define the discourse practices of writers in academic and professional writing contexts .

Step 1: Engage in Rhetorical Reasoning

Your first step when developing a plan for revising a document is taking an honest look at the rhetorical situation :

What is the Rhetorical Situation ?

As a first step in rhetorical analysis question

• Who your audience ?
• What do you hope to achieve by writing this document?
• What is your purpose ? thesis? research question?

. composing and interpretation are dynamic, rhetorical, social processes.

, question is. What do they need from you? What is your purpose? thesis? What is your context? Is this

• a personal situation
• a workplace situation
• a school situation
• an applied or basic research situation ?

By engaging in audience analysis, you can learn the discourse conventions your audiences expects you to adopt in order to communicate with them. that characterize the works of discourse community. For instance,

• the evaluative criteria might focus on tone as it reflects sincerity, honesty, candor, authenticity, trustworthiness
• writers, speakers, knowledge workers adopt
• the evaluative criteria might focus on Information Literacy Perspectives & Practices , research methods , and citation.

Step 2: Inspect the Document @ the Global Level

After you have reflected on the exigency, the call to write , you are ready to analyze the document at a higher-level of abstraction — the Global Level , or, what some people call the rhetorical level.

Begin your inspection by focusing only on the top-level elements , such as

• Letter of Transmittal
• Executive Summary
• Statement of the Problem
• Research Methods
• Results (optional)
• Recommendations
• Implementation Schedule
• Budget (guesstimate)
• Call to Action

At this point, you’re looking for problems in the document’s organizational schema.

At a glance, does the title, introduction, and headings (along with the table of contents if one exists) answer these questions for the intended reader, listener, user . . . of the document: 

• What is this document about?
• What organizational problem or need is being address?
• What is the occasion for this report?
• What type of document is this?
• What will the document accomplish?
• Where in the document can I find answers to the questions I might logically have?

If you cannot answer these questions based on a quick skim, make notes about the problems you see.

At the global level , you’re likely to encounter

Rhetorical Problems

• Structural Problems,
• Language Problems, and
• Critical & Analytical Thinking Problems.

For rhetorical problems , check to see if….

Structural Problems

For section-level problems , check to see if the…

Language Problems

For language-level problems , check to see if….

Critical & Analytical Thinking Problems @ the Global Level

For critical & analytical thinking problems , check to see if

Critical & Analytical Thinking Problems

For Critical & Analytical Thinking Problems , check to see if

• Do the proposed solutions make sense given the problem statement?
• Is the recommendation a realistic solution?
• Does the Gantt chart and other planning documents seem reasonable?

Step 3: Inspect the Document @ the Section Level

Next, critique the document section-by-section.

The intended readers for the document should be able to skim a section and answer these questions for that section : 

• What is this section about?
• What is the function of this section?
• What topics does this section address?
• How does this section connect to the sections before/after it?

If you cannot answer these questions, make notes about the problems you see.

At the section level , you’re likely to encounter

• rhetorical problems
• structural problems, and
• language problems , as outlined below:

To find rhetorical problems, ask these questions:

• Does the opening mislead readers?
• Do the headings mislead readers?
• Are the visuals and data appropriate for the target audience?
• Does color or design mislead readers by focusing their attention on less important information?

To find structural problems, ask these questions:

• Is this section one that conventional report structure would place in this location? Is this where a reader would expect to find this section?
• Does the heading adequately and accurately reflect the section’s contents (e.g. does the heading say the section is going to address a topic that the section does not actually address?)
• Are topics unbalanced?
• Do key topics need to be addressed in more depth because readers will find them challenging?
• Is color used consistently?

Keep an eye out for parallelism problems . Look at headings, opening paragraphs , subheadings, topic sentences , transitions , and visuals .

Language Problems concern how  a  text  is  composed  — its  diction ,  grammar , use of  mechanics ,  sentence structure , and  style of writing .  concern The Elements of Style , especially brevity , clarity , flow , simplicity , and unity

To find language problems, ask these questions:

• Is the diction appropriate for the target audience(s)?
• Is the style of writing appropriate given the rhetorical situation ?
• Are key terms used consistently across sections?

Step 4: Inspect the Document at the Paragraph Level

Read the document paragraph-by-paragraph, placing check marks as you go.

Your goal is to analyze whether the paragraphs in the document are well formed and structured.

• Do the paragraphs conform to the reader’s expectations for the genre and media of the document?
• Are the paragraphs unified?
• Is there a logical progression across paragraphs, informed by the given to new contract?
• Does the document use the rhetorical moves you believe it needs to help readers better understand paragraph unity and paragraph transitions?
• Are the paragraphs following a coordinate order, deductive order, or Inductive order? Would you recommend a different order to improve flow?
• What recommendations, if any, would you make regarding paragraph transitions ?

Step 5: Inspect the Document at the Sentence Level

Sentence-level perspective.

As you re-read your work or the work of others, place check marks next to:

• Sentences you find tedious
• Sentences you have to read more than once
• Sentences you don’t quite feel right about

Are there any problems in the document with brevity ; clarity ; flow, coherence, unity; and simplicity ?

What about grammar and mechanics ?

How to Revise Co-Authored Projects

Revising a document you wrote yourself can be hard work. Revising a document written by a group can be even more difficult:

• Once any text exists, it’s hard to get rid of either because writers don’t want to “lose” their hard work or are afraid of cutting important information by mistake.
• Documents – and especially formal reports – address multiple types of readers, whose needs and ways of interacting with the document differ.
• Documents that have been written by a team will have more problems with consistency than documents written by individuals.
• Writers may disagree about what changes to make.

Structured revision helps a team prioritize its revision efforts. It also allows the team to make strategic decisions about what work can be done and should be done given the time available and the relative importance of the project. 

Ideally, when conducted for a team project, individuals will independently conduct structured revisions before sharing insights with one another. This approach can help you answer the following questions:

• What are the most significant problems in the document – and where are they located?
• How much time do we have for revisions and editing?
• Should we spend on our time on the top-level design of the document, the content of a particular section, or sentence-level problems?

Porter,  J. E., Sullivan, P. , and Johnson-Eilola, J.  (2009).  Professional Writing Online 3.0 , 3 rd ed. New York: Pearson.

Brevity - Say More with Less

Clarity (in Speech and Writing)

Coherence - How to Achieve Coherence in Writing

Flow - How to Create Flow in Writing

Inclusivity - Inclusive Language

The Elements of Style - The DNA of Powerful Writing

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Revising A College Essay – Tips And Examples

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Making sure your college application essay is error-free, engaging, full of real examples, and free of grammatical mistakes may be a huge challenge. However, in academic writing , it is crucial to revise your college essay extensively before submitting it to ensure your hard work pays off and your messages are conveyed effectively. This article provides helpful tips for revising a college essay and improving your score.

Inhaltsverzeichnis

• 1 Revising a College Essay – In a Nutshell
• 2 Definition: Revising a college essay
• 3 Preparation before revising a college essay
• 4 Revising a college essay: Style and tone
• 5 Revising a college essay: Grammar and punctuation
• 6 Second opinion after revising a college essay

Revising a College Essay – In a Nutshell

• When revising a college essay, do not become defensive and limit the number of people who will read it.
• Once the initial draft of your essay is completed, set it aside and wait some time before returning to it for revision, editing, and proofreading.
• Select and proofread one paragraph at a time to alleviate stress and anxiety when revising a college essay.

Definition: Revising a college essay

Revising a college essay entails looking at your thoughts’ structure and progression. Revising a college essay is important because it helps:

• Refine the content and structure
• Improving clarity and coherence
• Ensuring the message is effectively communicated to the reader

The typical process of revising a college essay involves:

• Reviewing the content
• Making necessary changes to improve clarity
• Checking for grammatical errors
• Polishing the final draft

Throughout the process, it is important to consider the target audience, the purpose of the essay, the flow of ideas, and the overall coherence of the essay.

Preparation before revising a college essay

When revising a college essay for the first time, focus on the ideas presented and how well they flow together, rather than correcting any grammar mistakes you see.

Step1: Overall message

Step2: transition & flow, step 3: quality of content.

Here are some questions to consider when revising a college essay:

• How should I interpret the results of my essay?
• Have I addressed your question?
• Does it provide a lesson, or is it only illustrative?
• Do I illustrate my morals using personal anecdotes and case studies?
• Do these beliefs coincide with those of the school?
• Is there a good balance between focusing on myself and focusing on someone else or anything else?

Answering any of these questions negatively when revising a college essay means you need to rework your essay, as explained in the table below.

When revising a college essay, ensure it has a logical structure and flows well by highlighting each paragraph’s subject phrase and transition sentence. Adjust these subject and transition phrases as needed to create a coherent structure.

Conclude Revising a college essay by reading the essay over again to make sure it flows smoothly. Similarly, ensure your essay has an engaging opening and a satisfying conclusion that expands on the ideas presented in the essay’s body.

Call attention to anything confusing, dull, or redundant when revising a college essay. If you want your essay to stand out, you should:

• Go back and explain any unclear pieces
• Add lively language to the dull parts
• Cut away any unnecessary information

Check that your essay highlights the aspects of you that universities care about most: your hobbies, good qualities, and personality.

Revising a college essay: Style and tone

It’s important to employ the right tone while writing an essay, so read it and see whether you have struck the right balance between formality and informality. Consider the following questions:

• Is there a sense of myself in the essay? Do the words I have chosen flow well?
• Is it a weak point? Do my reflections about myself come over in my writing?
• Is the tone friendly and professional?
• Is it appropriate to broach such delicate subjects with such tact?

Read it aloud

You may overlook issues with voice and form in your writing if you read your essay quietly. Therefore, hearing it read aloud may assist when revising a college essay. Examples are overusing words, constructing sentences without parallelism, and using phrases that do not sound natural.

During the editing process, you should read your essay out loud numerous times. Errors in language and punctuation may be uncovered in this way as well.

Here are some options to consider:

• Perform a dramatic reading.
• Listen to it read out by someone else.
• Use text-to-speech software to hear it read back.
• Put yourself on tape and listen to it afterward.

Revising a college essay: Grammar and punctuation

After checking for overall coherence and writing style, read your essay once again for grammatical and punctuation faults.

Step 1: Run a spell check

Step 2: check punctuation, capitalization & verbs, step 3: sentence structure, step 4: coherency & consistency.

Start by checking for spelling, grammatical, and punctuation errors using your word processor’s spell check when revising a college essay.

Some small mistakes in punctuation or capitalization may slip by spell check when revising a college essay. Verify that verb tense and subject agreement is proper.

Look for sentence fragments, run-ons, and other grammar problems. Use a range of sentence lengths and styles when revising a college essay to keep the reading engaging.

The parallel structure of longer, more involved sentences should be checked. Clarity is maintained by removing unnecessary or inappropriate modifiers.

It’s important to maintain uniformity in your usage of abbreviations, acronyms, and verb tenses when revising a college essay. Modify any names or references to the prior institution if you want to submit the same essay to several schools.

Second opinion after revising a college essay

Before you send in your application, be sure to acquire some comments on your essay. Avoid getting too many pieces of advice contradicting each other by sticking to two or three readers.

Get opinions from individuals who understand you well, such as your instructors or loved ones. Having someone with great writing abilities and knowledge of the college admissions process would be best to read your essay and provide input on its substance, tone, and flow. Put these queries to your readers or editors and wait for their responses:

• Is it easy to recall what you read in the introduction?
• Should I include examples of how I have put my ideals into practice?
• Do paragraphs flow into one another easily?
• Please tell me what you learned from reading my essay.
• Where did you become confused, bored, or frustrated?
• Does my voice come through in the essay?
• Is it a weak point? Is there evidence of honest introspection?
• Does it seem to have the right tone?
• Do you find my humor amusing, if any?

Feedback from a teacher, guidance counselor, or mentor

Here is the best team to get feedback from.

A teacher already acquainted with your work is a good resource for advice on narrative, flow, and language when Revising a college essay. Your English instructor is a good choice.

• Acquainted with your work
• Possesses a solid foundation in writing, grammar, and style fundamentals for narrative essays
• Possibly too many requests for assistance from other students
• Possible unfamiliarity with the format expected of college essays

Guidance counselor

You may even ask your school’s guidance counselor, who should know what admissions authorities search for in a college application essay.

• Has a solid understanding of how to apply to universities
• Undoubtedly swamped with requests for assistance from other learners
• Possibly will not be acquainted with your work or you as a person

Your extracurricular activity mentor or coach is another responsible adult you can approach.

• Is familiar with your history
• Perhaps they are not used to writing in a collegiate fashion
• Possibly not a very good writer

Feedback from family or friends

Having family and friends review your work when revising a college essay is a great way to ensure it accurately represents who you are. However, if you want more in-depth criticism, ask for assistance from relatives who excel in writing or English.

• Acquainted with your history, character, and major life events
• Allows you to gauge the degree to which your essay displays honesty and openness
• Potentially not the best person to edit your essay
• Potentially will provide emotionally-neutral recommendations
• Negative comments from a loved one may be particularly trying

Feedback from a professional coach or editor

When revising a college essay, an essay editor can provide impartial, experienced input after you have heard criticism from friends and family.

• Has an expert understanding of entrance essays for universities
• Provides insightful, impartial criticism of your writing’s structure, organization, and style
• Not acquainted with you or your history

Tip for considering feedback in your essay

When revising a college essay, get some sleep or take a few hours off after getting comments. Then, when some time has passed, come back with a clear head to consider comments.

The number of revisions you do depends on the kind of writing you do. Keep each essay draft in its file in case you need to go back to it for ideas or words.

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What should be considered when revising a college admission essay?

When revising a college essay, you should first look for any overarching problems with the paper’s content, flow, tone, style, or clarity. The next step is to proofread for typos and fix grammatical problems.

When revising a college essay, how many times should I do It?

There can be multiple revision phases, depending on the length and complexity of your essay. Always take a break from working on your essay after each round of editing so that you can return to it with fresh eyes.

What are the goals of revising a college essay?

Revising a college essay makes remembering the specifics of your studied subject easier. Students who review the material are more likely to try any questions on the subject in the test.

What impact does revising a college essay have on the substance of your writing?

Revising a college essay effectively entails examining your response to the assignment’s directions and the clarity of your concept communication by revising a college essay. Similarly, correction of grammatical, punctuation, and presentational errors will be aided by revision.

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Revision Strategies

Revision Strategies  

Why is Revising Important? What is Revision? 

Now what? You’ve done your research, written your paper, but the big question now is: what do you do next? Answer: Revise. Although it can be a daunting word, revision is the time during your writing when you can carefully go back over your paper to fix any mistakes that may confuse or trip up your reader. Revision is a time to smooth out the flow of your thoughts through transitioning between your paragraphs, to make sure that each of your paragraphs are balanced with supporting evidence and your own original thought, and to look at sentence level edits like grammar and sentence flow in the final stages. While most see this as a time to make sure commas are in the right place, revision is for looking at the big picture just as much as the fine details and below are some tips and tricks to get you started!      

How do I Go About it?   

One of the first steps in the revision process is making sure you set aside enough time to properly edit your paper. If you finish a paper twenty minutes before it’s due, then there is little you can do to revise it. Although sometimes it’s hard to find time to write and revise amidst your busy schedule, I promise it’s worth it!   

Writing a paper a few days before it is due will allow you to take a step back and edit the big and small details without the pressure of a looming deadline. This will also give you time to consult writing tutors, your classmates, or your teacher if you find you need help during the process. The ratio of planned writing time to revision is usually along the lines of 70/30 or 80/20 depending on the type of writing assignment you have.   

For example, if you are assigned an 8-page research paper, then you are more than likely going to spend 70% of your timing writing and 30% of your time revising since you will have more writing that needs revising before you turn it. This is versus if you are assigned a 1-page reflection essay that requires you to spend more time writing at 80% and only about 20% of your time revising since there is only so much writing that can fit onto one page.        

Let’s face it, many of us get bored while writing. Taking a brief moment to step back after writing your first draft to do other things will allow you to return to the assignment later with fresh eyes in order to spot any errors that you may have missed before.   

The Big Picture   

When thinking about revision, our minds often jump to making sentence-level edits first. However, revision is much more than that!   

The first step in any revision process is taking a step back to look at the big picture. Does your paper have an introduction with a thesis statement? Does it have complete and coherent body paragraphs? What about a conclusion that sums up the main focus of your paper for the reader one last time? For a better understanding of how a typical essay is organized, check out “How is it Organized?” on our Reading Strategies page. 

Keep in mind that the Big Picture also includes any rubrics or assignment guidelines that your teacher may have given you. It’s important to note requirements like word/paper length during writing and revision as you don’t want to have a complete paper only to realize at the end that you missed the word count or forgot to include three scholarly sources. For more tips on how to keep rubrics and requirements in mind click here to jump to our section on assignment guidelines . Link to rubrics and assignments guidelines sections below.      

Main Intent 

Start with the main intent of your paper which is found in the ‘thesis statement.’ The thesis statement is included in the introduction paragraph and is typically found at the conclusion of the paragraph. It tells what the text will focus on and how the writer plans to achieve this. Do you state clearly and concisely what your paper will achieve and why and/or how? Do your body paragraphs support your thesis statement? Does your conclusion paragraph match your thesis statement? If you make sure that every part of your paper can be brought back to your thesis statement, then your paper will be more well-rounded and fluent.  

Note the thesis statement that is highlighted in yellow from an analysis paper on the biblical prophetess Deborah below.  

This thesis statement tells what the body paragraphs will analyze: “these texts” (analysis being the how ). It also tells why : because “they are more important in setting an example for woman of all ages by displaying how God uses a female to undertake several predominantly male roles, as He resorts to His preferred method of using the unexpected, or, in this case, a woman, to conquer a problem.”  

The following paragraphs in the paper will analyze the biblical texts that mention Deborah in order to show the reader that God uses women in male roles, an aspect that the writer found while analyzing the texts. We can assume that certain body paragraphs will inform us of the texts and others will attempt to prove the writer’s reasoning with supporting evidence from other sources.  

Paragraphs 

When reviewing your body paragraphs, you may want to consider why you are writing your paper. Are you trying to argue, persuade, or analyze? Does the structure of your paper enable you to do so? For example, a research paper is different from a persuasive paper since a persuasive paper is trying to persuade t he reader to see a topic as the writer does while a research paper focuses on objectively analyzing available sources of a topic to come to a conclusion, without regards to the writer’s personal opinion. So , the persuasive paper will have paragraphs that inform the reader of a topic, but also paragraphs that attempt to prove to the reader why their stance is the best stance on the topic.    

Topic Sentences tell the intent and focus of a paragraph. Most of the time they are original thought or observation. They can sometimes be used to attract the reader’s attention to a certain issue or point by giving a preview of what the paragraph is about which propels them to keep reading. Topic sentences are typically found at the beginning and ending of a paragraph to introduce and then sum up the points mentioned within the paragraph.  

For example, if you were to write a topic sentence for a paragraph in the aforementioned Deborah essay stating that it is hard to properly analyze the biblical texts because women prophets, especially Deborah, are sadly not as studied as male prophets, a poor intro topic sentence for paragraph might be:  

“Many people find it difficult to study the texts with Deborah in them because there is little research done on female prophets.” 

While we are able to see that this paragraph will focus on the aspect of female prophets and that it is hard to study the texts with Deborah in them because there is little research on female prophets, there is no transition from the last paragraph to connect the thoughts of the paper nor is the sentence specific about who the “many people” are.    

Whereas a more defined topic sentence with proper transitioning between paragraphs and one that introduces the full intent of the paragraph might be:   

“Although the only apparent struggles in analyzing such texts could be seen through their aforementioned slight detailed differences, a majority of scholars find textual difficulties presented in the lack of focus on female prophets in general.”   

This topic sentence, which is the first sentence of the paragraph, transitions the reader from the paragraph before it by using a good transition phrase starting with the word “Although.” “Although” is generally used to compare and contrast ideas, and ere it is used to do just that.   

By acknowledging the intent of the paragraph before it as well as previous research in general, this makes the previous information relevant to this paragraph since the content of this paragraph will be slightly contrasting since the writer is stating that this is actually the biggest issue in analysis not the other ones previously stated even though they are important too.   

The second half of the sentence also serves to tell the intent of the paragraph. Here as the reader, we know that we are going to be presented with sources that support the idea that there is a lack of focus on female prophets in general which makes it hard to study them.   

Some questions to ask might be:  

•   Do your paragraphs have a clear topic sentence? Do your topic sentences tell the main intent of that specific paragraph? Is it one clear point? If not, you may want to pick the point that best describes the content in your paragraph.    
• Do your paragraphs transition smoothly? What draws your attention during reading? Is it to the things that you want to draw attention to?  

Examples/Evidence provide a foundation atop which you can build your paper on. Teachers will typically give a minimum or maximum number of sources that you can have in your paper within the rubric or assignment guidelines. Always remember to pick sources that will best support the main intent of your paper and the assignment’s requirements. However, try to keep an open mind when you’re choosing your sources. When you’re writing a paper, you want sources that will support your argument, but, if you’re struggling to find any, try reconsidering your initial idea . It’s okay to be wrong, and it’s okay to revise and change; that’s all part of the process of learning. What you want to avoid is pulling bits and pieces from sources that don’t agree with your argument. This is called ‘cherry-picking’, and it can actually make writing a paper harder, since you have to construct writing that fits your sources, instead of finding sources that fit your writing. Some questions to ask would be:  

• Do your paragraphs have enough examples, quotes, paraphrasing, and summary from other sources to provide support for the main topic of each paragraph? Do you have more quotes than paraphrasing or vice vera?  
• Sometimes it may work better to have a quote rather than summary; however, keep in mind that well-rounded papers typically have an even amount of all in order to keep the audience’s attention and show that you know what you are talking about.    
• Do you explain why you included that examples, quotes, paraphrasing, or summary with a follow-up sentence on how it supports your argument or research? Does your inclusion of this example lead into the idea of your next sentence?  
• Sometimes having too many sources can drown out your own thought, so be sure to keep an eye out to see if your paragraphs are balanced with original thought and other sources.    

One way to check if your paragraphs are complete is by putting them to the PREP test:  

P oint: Does your paragraph have an introduction topic sentence? What is this paragraph going to be about?   

R eason: Does your paragraph give reasoning for your topic sentence? Why do you think this way, or why is your point valid?   

E xample: Does your paragraph provide an example/ evidence from supporting sources that backup your reasoning. Do you provide quotes, and/or paraphrasing, and/or summary from other sources?  

P oint: Does your paragraph have a conclusion topic sentence? Does it sum up/(re)state the focus of the paragraph without being repetitive? Does it provide a smooth transition into your next paragraph?    

Structural Edits 

Structural Edits are just what the name hints at: they involve the overall structure, or layout, of your paper. When doing structural edits, you are looking at how your paragraphs are arranged and how the sentences within them are arranged.   

Are your paragraphs arranged in a way that promotes the best flow of thoughts and transitions between them? Are your sentences arranged in a way that enables the reader to follow your thoughts while reading? Or are your paragraphs choppy and jump from idea to idea without any rhyme or reason?    

Here are a few different ways of how to go about Structural Edits:    

The Outline Method  

As you reread your paper, create an outline as you go. Do not look at your original outline but follow the flow of your written paper.   

Note where your introduction and thesis are. What does your introduction introduce and how? Note where each of your paragraphs are, what the focus of each paragraph is, what supporting and/or challenging evidence does it provide, and where their topic sentences are. Finally, note where your conclusion is. Does it sum up everything in your paper well?   

Once you finish, you should have an outline that looks somewhat like this:  

(Access a downloadable copy of the  Outline Method here.)

Now pull your original outline back out. Does your current outline and original outline match in the same places? If not, look and see how and why. Are your paragraphs in reverse order? Do you have holes in your new outline where you haven’t supported a point in one of your paragraphs? Are your topic sentences in the middle of one of your paragraphs instead of at the beginning or end? Does this work for that particular paragraph (sometimes it can depending on the length and focus of the paragraph)?   

Please note that outlines are meant to be flexible, so if your current outline doesn’t 100% match the original outline THIS IS OKAY because some changes are good! As you write and revise, you are usually able to feel and see if it makes more sense to put one paragraph in a different place or to use one source but not the other. Most of the time you know when something doesn’t look or sound right as you’re writing or editing. Just make sure that your new outline matches the main points you are trying to focus on in the original outline. Trust your instincts and, if you are not sure, consult a writing tutor, your classmates, or your teacher for advice on how to revise your paper.    

One last thing to remember is the above outline is an outline for a basic essay. If you are doing scientific research or writing a business proposal, your outline is bound to look different. However, the same basic principles still apply. Read your writing, create an outline of your writing from your reading, and consult and compare your original and current outline to see if you need to change anything.         

The PowerPoint Method  

If you are a visual leaner, one way to help you visualize your paper is by copying and pasting your paragraphs onto PowerPoint slides. Put one paragraph on a slide from beginning to end (ex: Introduction is on the first slide and Conclusion is on the last slide). Now read your paper both in your head or out loud if that helps. Does your paper flow well in the order that it is in? Try moving some of the slides around. Does it read better if Paragraph 2 is in front of Paragraph 1? While you won’t always need to rearrange your paragraphs, if you are finding that your paper is a little hard to read or choppy, using the PowerPoint method can help you see if it is the layout that is affecting your paper’s flow.   

Sentences   

Note that you could also use the same method when looking at the sentences in one of your paragraphs if it harder to read. Create a PowerPoint and try putting one sentence on each slide. Now seeing if moving some slides around in a different order helps the paragraph to be read better or be understood more easily. Do you find that you need an example to backup up one of your own statements in the paragraph? Do sentences 4 and 5 need to be rearranged to make everything clearer? Do you need to delete a sentence in order for everything to be connected better?     

The Paragraph-Cutting Method 

If you’re a hands-on learner this might be just the thing for you!  

Paragraph cutting is much like the PowerPoint Method. If you’re not comfortable with PowerPoint or don’t have the time, print your paper out and lay it in front of you. With scissors, cut the paragraphs out and line them up top to bottom from introduction to conclusion and start reading.  

Just like the PowerPoint method, you can rearrange the paragraphs to see what layout best fits your paper and intent. You can also use this method on individual paragraphs by cutting up the sentences and rearranging them as noted above.  

During this time, you might realize that a sentence you have in Paragraph 1 might actually fit better in Paragraph 3, so you can physically cut it out and move it to the other paragraph. Once you are done take a picture of your finished structure just in case you forget your edits later, and then transfer your edits into your actual paper.        

The Highlighting Method 

The Highlighting Method is a simple way to check the structure of your paper and assess what you do or don’t have in your paper as well. With at least 4 different colored highlighters (or more depending on the type of paper you’re writing or what your rubric asks you to include) highlight the different elements of your paper. Maybe you want your thesis and topic sentences to be highlighted in blue and your supporting evidence to be highlighted in orange. The Highlighting Method gives you a chance to see the placement and type of sentences you have in each paragraph by color-coordinating. This not only helps you to assess your paragraphs but also how much or how little you have in each paragraph.        

   Note in the example of the Highlighter Method above:  

• Topic sentences (which are original thought or observation) are highlighted in yellow.   
• Quotes are highlighted in green.   
• Summary is highlighted in blue. 
• Paraphrasing is highlighted in gray.   
• Anything that is not highlighted is original thought from the writer.   

The end result: This method allows us to see that this paragraph is balanced with original thought as well as a variety of sources and ways in which the writer was able incorporate them into her paragraph.  

Rubrics and Assignment Guidelines  

Teachers typically give a rubric or assignment guideline when assigning a paper so make sure to consult it when you start the revision process to remind yourself what you need to include in your paper. They are extremely helpful in making sure that you have all the big bases covered in your writing since they include what the teacher expects to find when reading your paper, such as word length, formatting, number and type of sources, and how clear your points are.      

It might be helpful for you to print out a copy of the rubric or assignment guideline for yourself and check off if you meet each of paper’s requirements when revising. If you find that you have the box for word length checked off but don’t have enough sources to meet the minimum for the source requirement, this gives you a chance to find additional sources and incorporate them into your paper before the deadline.  

Rubrics and assignment guidelines can be your best friends when you’re revising! Don’t be afraid of using them to your advantage during the revision process!    

Sentence Level Edits   While it’s essential to make sure that there are no issues with the overall structure of your paper, you should also look at some of the smaller problems. You can go about tackling some of the sentence-level edits by proofreading your paper.   

Proofreading   Proofreading is usually the final step when it comes to revising. This is when you read over your paper specifically to look for any mistakes involving things such as spelling, grammar, and punctuation. Even though revising involves more than just checking your grammar, it’s still important to make sure that your paper is grammatically correct. Having grammatical errors in your paper can not only cause you to lose points on your assignment, but it can also cause your readers to become confused and misunderstand what you’re trying to say. Before you begin this process, you should doublecheck to make sure that you’ve handled any larger issues first, such as problems with the organization, style or formatting issues, etc. If everything’s correct, then you’re ready to take a look at the grammatical errors.  While proofreading may seem like a tedious process, there are a few strategies that may help you.  

Proofreading Strategies 

Set your work to the side for a little while.   After you’ve spent some time writing and revising a paper, you become very familiar with it. You know what it says, or what it’s supposed to say. However, this familiarity can actually be a hindrance when it comes to trying to proofread. So, after you’ve finished with your major revisions, consider setting your paper to the side for a bit, maybe overnight, or even just for a few hours if you’re short on time. That way, when you come back to it, you’ll have a fresh perspective to begin proofreading with.  

Don’t just use Spellcheck.   Spellcheck, or any program like it, is a very useful tool when it comes to proofreading. You should always make sure to use it before turning in an assignment, as it can catch errors that you might not have noticed. However, you should not rely on it. There are certain problems that it can’t catch, or that it may miss, so you should look back over your paper after using Spellcheck on it.  

Print out a hard copy.   Printing out a hard copy of your paper has some of the same benefits as setting it aside for a few days. By the time you’ve reached the proofreading stage of revision, you’ll have already become very familiar with your paper, and you’ll have become used to seeing it on a screen. When you print your paper out, you’ll be seeing it in a new format, which can make it easier to spot errors. Also, having a hard copy of your paper gives you the opportunity to mark-up a physical copy of your work.  

Read your work out loud.   Reading your work out loud can help you find grammatical errors, but it’s mainly useful for making sure that your sentences flow together and don’t sound awkward. Something that looks good on paper may actually end up sounding disjointed. This is a great way to ensure that your writing is cohesive. Reading aloud in front of a friend or family member can also be helpful for identifying these types of errors. They may be able to catch things that you may not notice.   

Look for one type of error at a time.   Proofreading may seem like a daunting task, as it encompasses so many things. A way to make it less intimidating can be that you only focus on looking for one type of error at a time. For example, on your first read-through, you look for any spelling errors. Then, on your second read-through, you look for any comma errors. This can help to make the proofreading process a little more manageable.  

Ask another person to review it.   Once you’re finished proofreading your paper, it can still be helpful to have another set of eyes look over it. Like with setting your work aside, or printing out a hard copy, having a fresh perspective look over the paper can be helpful. You can ask a friend or family member to read your work, or you can always make an appointment with a consultant at the Writing Center to go over your paper. If you’d like to set up an appointment with a consultant, click here .   

Many people have trouble knowing when and where to use a comma in their sentences. This can lead to confusion in their readers, because, depending on where a comma is placed, it can change the meaning of the sentence completely. Below are a few general rules that can help you check and make sure that your paper uses commas correctly.  

If you still need some help with this, click here for some more examples of proper comma use.  

Subject Verb Agreement 

Another common mistake that people make while writing a paper is that, in their sentences, their subjects and verbs don’t agree. Subjects and verbs agree when they are both singular or plural, and in the same “person” (first person, third person, etc.). An example of subject-verb agreement would be: “I am” or “he is”, while an example of subject-verb disagreement would be: “He am” or “I is”.    

Here are a few rules you should keep in mind to make sure that your subjects and verbs agree throughout your paper.   

If you still need some help with this, click here for some more examples of subject-verb agreement.  

Active and Passive Voice 

While you’re working on your paper, you should always make sure to keep your writing in the active voice, and not the passive voice. The difference between the two is that in the active voice, the subject of your sentence is performing the action, while in the passive voice, the subject is receiving the action. That may sound confusing, so here’s an example to show you what they both look like.  

Active Voice Example: The hero saved the day.   

Passive Voice Example: The day was saved by the hero.  

In the first example, the subject of the sentence, the hero, is performing the verb. He is actively saving the day. However, in the second example, the action already happened. It’s in the past; the day was saved.   

In your writing, you want to avoid phrases that sound like the second example. The active voice is typically clearer, which makes it easier for your readers to understand what it is that you’re trying to say.   

While you’re editing your writing, if you come across a sentence that includes a “by the…” phrase, that sentence is probably written in the passive voice. You can fix it by rearranging some of your words.   

For example: The knight was kidnapped by the dragon .  

You see we have a “by the” phrase. That means that this sentence is written in the passive voice, so, what we need to do is reorganize. Who is actually doing something in this sentence? The dragon, he is actively kidnapping the knight. The knight is being useless and doing nothing, so why should he be the star of the sentence? He shouldn’t be; the dragon should be the subject instead. So, he and the knight switch places. If the dragon is the new subject, then we need to update our verb as well.  

So, our new sentence would be: The dragon kidnapped the knight.  

This sentence is written in the active voice, because the subject of the sentence, the dragon, is the one who is doing something.   

If you still need some help with this, click here for some more examples of how to change passive voice sentences into active voice.   

Questions to Keep You on Track   

As you’re revising your paper, feel free to use the questions below to help you through the revision process.   

Print out your own checklist here.

References  

Academic Guides. (n.d.). Writing a Paper: Proofreading .  https://academicguides.waldenu.edu/writingcenter/writingprocess/proofreading .   

Hobart and William Smith Colleges. (n.d.). Academics: Revision Strategies . https://www.hws.edu/academics/ctl/writes_revision.aspx .  

Lumen. (n.d.). Guide to Writing . https://courses.lumenlearning.com/styleguide/chapter/subject-verb-agreement/ .   

Purdue Writing Lab. (n.d.). Changing Passive to Active Voice // Purdue Writing Lab . Purdue Writing Lab. https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/general_writing/academic_writing/active_and_passive_voice/changing_passive_to_active_voice.html .  

Student Success. (n.d.). Commas (Eight Basic Uses) . https://www.iue.edu/student-success/coursework/commas.html .  

The Writing Center. (n.d.). Subject-Verb Agreement .  https://writingcenter.gmu.edu/guides/subject-verb-agreement .  

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• How to write an essay outline | Guidelines & examples

How to Write an Essay Outline | Guidelines & Examples

Published on August 14, 2020 by Jack Caulfield . Revised on July 23, 2023.

An essay outline is a way of planning the structure of your essay before you start writing. It involves writing quick summary sentences or phrases for every point you will cover in each paragraph , giving you a picture of how your argument will unfold.

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Table of contents

Organizing your material, presentation of the outline, examples of essay outlines, other interesting articles, frequently asked questions about essay outlines.

At the stage where you’re writing an essay outline, your ideas are probably still not fully formed. You should know your topic  and have already done some preliminary research to find relevant sources , but now you need to shape your ideas into a structured argument.

Creating categories

Look over any information, quotes and ideas you’ve noted down from your research and consider the central point you want to make in the essay—this will be the basis of your thesis statement . Once you have an idea of your overall argument, you can begin to organize your material in a way that serves that argument.

Try to arrange your material into categories related to different aspects of your argument. If you’re writing about a literary text, you might group your ideas into themes; in a history essay, it might be several key trends or turning points from the period you’re discussing.

Three main themes or subjects is a common structure for essays. Depending on the length of the essay, you could split the themes into three body paragraphs, or three longer sections with several paragraphs covering each theme.

As you create the outline, look critically at your categories and points: Are any of them irrelevant or redundant? Make sure every topic you cover is clearly related to your thesis statement.

Order of information

When you have your material organized into several categories, consider what order they should appear in.

Your essay will always begin and end with an introduction and conclusion , but the organization of the body is up to you.

Consider these questions to order your material:

• Is there an obvious starting point for your argument?
• Is there one subject that provides an easy transition into another?
• Do some points need to be set up by discussing other points first?

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Within each paragraph, you’ll discuss a single idea related to your overall topic or argument, using several points of evidence or analysis to do so.

In your outline, you present these points as a few short numbered sentences or phrases.They can be split into sub-points when more detail is needed.

The template below shows how you might structure an outline for a five-paragraph essay.

• Thesis statement
• First piece of evidence
• Second piece of evidence
• Summary/synthesis
• Importance of topic
• Strong closing statement

You can choose whether to write your outline in full sentences or short phrases. Be consistent in your choice; don’t randomly write some points as full sentences and others as short phrases.

Examples of outlines for different types of essays are presented below: an argumentative, expository, and literary analysis essay.

Argumentative essay outline

This outline is for a short argumentative essay evaluating the internet’s impact on education. It uses short phrases to summarize each point.

Its body is split into three paragraphs, each presenting arguments about a different aspect of the internet’s effects on education.

• Importance of the internet
• Concerns about internet use
• Thesis statement: Internet use a net positive
• Data exploring this effect
• Analysis indicating it is overstated
• Students’ reading levels over time
• Why this data is questionable
• Video media
• Interactive media
• Speed and simplicity of online research
• Questions about reliability (transitioning into next topic)
• Evidence indicating its ubiquity
• Claims that it discourages engagement with academic writing
• Evidence that Wikipedia warns students not to cite it
• Argument that it introduces students to citation
• Summary of key points
• Value of digital education for students
• Need for optimism to embrace advantages of the internet

Expository essay outline

This is the outline for an expository essay describing how the invention of the printing press affected life and politics in Europe.

The paragraphs are still summarized in short phrases here, but individual points are described with full sentences.

• Claim that the printing press marks the end of the Middle Ages.
• Provide background on the low levels of literacy before the printing press.
• Present the thesis statement: The invention of the printing press increased circulation of information in Europe, paving the way for the Reformation.
• Discuss the very high levels of illiteracy in medieval Europe.
• Describe how literacy and thus knowledge and education were mainly the domain of religious and political elites.
• Indicate how this discouraged political and religious change.
• Describe the invention of the printing press in 1440 by Johannes Gutenberg.
• Show the implications of the new technology for book production.
• Describe the rapid spread of the technology and the printing of the Gutenberg Bible.
• Link to the Reformation.
• Discuss the trend for translating the Bible into vernacular languages during the years following the printing press’s invention.
• Describe Luther’s own translation of the Bible during the Reformation.
• Sketch out the large-scale effects the Reformation would have on religion and politics.
• Summarize the history described.
• Stress the significance of the printing press to the events of this period.

Literary analysis essay outline

The literary analysis essay outlined below discusses the role of theater in Jane Austen’s novel Mansfield Park .

The body of the essay is divided into three different themes, each of which is explored through examples from the book.

• Describe the theatricality of Austen’s works
• Outline the role theater plays in Mansfield Park
• Introduce the research question : How does Austen use theater to express the characters’ morality in Mansfield Park ?
• Discuss Austen’s depiction of the performance at the end of the first volume
• Discuss how Sir Bertram reacts to the acting scheme
• Introduce Austen’s use of stage direction–like details during dialogue
• Explore how these are deployed to show the characters’ self-absorption
• Discuss Austen’s description of Maria and Julia’s relationship as polite but affectionless
• Compare Mrs. Norris’s self-conceit as charitable despite her idleness
• Summarize the three themes: The acting scheme, stage directions, and the performance of morals
• Answer the research question
• Indicate areas for further study

If you want to know more about AI tools , college essays , or fallacies make sure to check out some of our other articles with explanations and examples or go directly to our tools!

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You will sometimes be asked to hand in an essay outline before you start writing your essay . Your supervisor wants to see that you have a clear idea of your structure so that writing will go smoothly.

Even when you do not have to hand it in, writing an essay outline is an important part of the writing process . It’s a good idea to write one (as informally as you like) to clarify your structure for yourself whenever you are working on an essay.

If you have to hand in your essay outline , you may be given specific guidelines stating whether you have to use full sentences. If you’re not sure, ask your supervisor.

When writing an essay outline for yourself, the choice is yours. Some students find it helpful to write out their ideas in full sentences, while others prefer to summarize them in short phrases.

You should try to follow your outline as you write your essay . However, if your ideas change or it becomes clear that your structure could be better, it’s okay to depart from your essay outline . Just make sure you know why you’re doing so.

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Revising an Essay- the do’s, the don’ts, and a Sample

Introduction.

We all know that we should revise our essays before submitting them to ensure the best possible grade, but we will discuss how and why in this article. We will cover what you can do to improve your essay during revision and what not to do so that you don’t accidentally make it worse. Finally, I’ll show you an example of a revised essay using these techniques and provide feedback on its strengths and weaknesses.

However, in case you wish to skip this guide due to reasons such as a busy schedule, our top writers are ready to cover you by ensuring that your informative essay is written to the highest standards. All you need to do is place an order with us!

The Do’s of Revising an Essay

• Be concise: cut out anything that doesn’t serve a purpose in helping you make your point; this is one of those rare times when writing less can be better! If you have good examples to back up any claims you’re making, use only those; if you don’t, delete any unnecessary examples/claims.
• Proofread: it’s a good idea to read the whole essay aloud after finishing editing. Reading your work aloud will help catch mistakes like spelling errors or grammar issues that might be difficult for eyes alone to spot. Be sure also to have someone else read the essay to see anything you might not have noticed.
• Be realistic: don’t get too caught up in the idea of perfection, or you’ll never be able to finish your revisions. It’s much better to have a draft that is close enough and good enough than one that has potential but will take forever to edit until it’s perfect.
• Focus on improving clarity: don’t be afraid of being repetitive; it might feel like you are adding unnecessary words, but it will help fix any misunderstandings about your point in reality.
• Spend time improving your sentence structure and organization to clear what you are trying to say in each paragraph .

The Don’ts of Revising an Essay

• Don’t be afraid to delete sentences that don’t add new information: it’s better to have a shorter and clearer essay than one with lots of unnecessary words.
• Don’t change your tone: if you are writing formally, don’t try to make it sound more casual.
• Don’t get too caught up in the idea of perfection, or you’ll never be able to finish your revisions. It’s much better to have a draft that is good enough and close enough that one with potential but will take forever to edit until it’s perfect.
• Don’t be afraid of being repetitive: sometimes, the words you use over and over again can help fix any misunderstandings about your point; don’t feel like every sentence has to have variations for your essay to sound more interesting.
• Don’t change your introduction or conclusion: if you are writing an introduction, don’t start with your thesis statement. If you have a concluding paragraph , don’t end the essay without summarizing what you’ve just written (in other words – include your thesis at the beginning and in the ending sentence).
• Don’t forget to proofread! It’s essential to read everything aloud once you’re done editing to catch any mistakes that might be difficult for eyes alone to spot. Be sure to have someone else read your essay as well; proofreading is one of the most critical parts of revising a piece, so don’t forget!
• Don’t write in bullet points: this often happens when a person knows they need to cut out information and adds bullet points to make it seem like they’re keeping all the information in.
• Don’t write numbers: this often happens when a person knows that their point is weak or has little evidence. Hence, they try to add some statistics or scientific arguments to back up what they are saying but end up sounding ridiculous because of how these types of information are typically presented.
• Don’t plagiarize

Steps for Revising Your Paper:

While revising your paper, remember to go through all these steps for an effective revision:

1.     Find your main point.

The first step in the revision process is to find your main point. The keyword here, of course, is “your,” as you must identify what your thesis or claim about a topic should be – not someone else’s. If you are unsure about where this should go, try going back into your essay and reading the first sentence of each paragraph. This will give you an idea about where your essay begins and what it talks about throughout the course of its body paragraphs.

Another place to find your main point is in the outline . If you are using an outline system for your essay, there should be a sentence or two that explains each paragraph’s main point. This is also an excellent place to look if you’re not sure about where your thesis statement belongs to other sections within the body of your paper.

Getting back on track with finding and stating your main point is a critical piece of the revision process because it helps you focus on what’s most relevant to your paper.

2.     Evaluate your evidence.

The next step after finding your main point(s) is to evaluate the evidence supporting the points. This step is vital because it will help you see the strengths and weaknesses of your paper. You may want to determine how persuasive each paragraph is based on its evidence or decide if a particular point needs more support to strengthen that argument.

Once again, this process begins with reading your essay from top-to-bottom. This way, you can see how the evidence and arguments fit together as a whole. You may also want to go through your paper in sections, focusing on one paragraph or sentence at a time.

This process is challenging because it forces you to scrutinize every word you’ve written. Still, it’s necessary to be as solid and convincing as possible if you want all of the points in your paper to be as factual and compelling as possible.

3.     Save only the good pieces.

In this step of revising your essay, you will save only the good pieces. This doesn’t mean that you should delete anything that you’ve written, but it does mean that you should be selective as you are revising your paper and choose what stays based on how well those sentences support your point or arguments.

It’s also important not to feel discouraged as you’re going through this process- no one’s first draft is perfect, and those are the pieces that need to be saved.

4.     Eliminate mistakes in grammar and usage.

The last step in the revision process is to find any mistakes that you may have made in grammar or usage and eliminate them. This will help make sure that everything flows smoothly throughout your paper, as well as make it more professional-looking.

You might also want to check ACT writing prompts

What happens if I no longer agree with my point?

If you find that your original point doesn’t seem as strong or convincing to you, it may be time for a new one. Try thinking about what the opposing viewpoint would say to refute your argument better.

If you no longer agree with your point, find the most relevant one to your paper and make sure that everything about it is as strong as possible:

• Evaluate evidence .
• Eliminate mistakes in grammar and usage.
• Consider what the opposing viewpoint might say on this topic to develop a stronger statement for your essay.

What if I Revise the Work as I Go?

The revision process can be a long one, so it may happen that you’ll need to revise the work as you go. This means that if something doesn’t seem right or is missing somewhere in your paper- fix it!

It’s important not to get discouraged when this happens: there are no perfect first drafts, and mistakes will always creep up. It’s okay to make mistakes and fix them. That is what revision is all about!

How can I Make Sure my Essay is as Solid and Convincing as Possible?

First, read your entire paper top-to to bottom. This will help you see how the evidence and arguments fit together so that all points are equally persuasive or supported by evidence. You may also want to go through your draft in sections, looking at one moment at a time.

Save only the best pieces of your work, be selective when revising it, and choose what stays based on how well they support your argument or point. It’s also important not to feel discouraged as you’re going through this process- no one’s first draft is perfect! Those are the pieces that need to be saved.

Eliminate mistakes in grammar and usage to make sure that your paper flows smoothly and make it more professional-looking. If you find yourself questioning whether or not the point of view is still accurate or convincing for you, consider what an opposing viewpoint would say on this topic to develop a stronger statement.

If you find a mistake or something that needs to be fixed in your paper, fix it! Make sure the work flows smoothly and is as professional-looking as possible. Remember: there are no perfect first drafts- mistakes will always creep up. It’s okay to make mistakes and fix them; this is what revision is all about.

You might also want to check the analysis of a modest proposal

What are the Benefits of Good Revision Strategies?

The revision process is vital because it evaluates whether or not the point of view is still accurate and convincing.

The revision also evaluates evidence, eliminates grammar and usage mistakes, and considers what the opposing viewpoint might say about the topic.

Also, great revision strategies can improve the flow of your paper, make it more professional-looking and easier to read, as well as keep you from getting discouraged during the process!

It’s important not to give up when things don’t seem right- that is what revision is for!

Best Practices to Revise at Sentence Level

When reading your paper top to bottom, make sure that everything you have said is as accurate and persuasive as possible.

It’s important to read through the piece in sections so that one point can be evaluated at a time for its strength or accuracy. You may also want to go over each sentence of content on its own: if it doesn’t fit in line with the paper, eliminate it!

Look for mistakes in grammar and usage: this will help make your sentences easier to read.

Best Practices for Sentence Level Revision:

• Read through the piece top to bottom in sections, evaluating one point at a time for strength and accuracy.
• Look out for mistakes in grammar usage.
• Eliminate sentences that don’t fit well into the flow or context of your paper and save only those that make a lot of sense and are persuasive in their argument.
• Also, you can look for sentences that don’t work and get rid of them.
• Rewrite certain sections with more detail or focus on improving the paper.
• Don’t give up if things seem hard: revision is what you need to make your work stronger or evaluate a point of view!

What if You Don’t Want to Rewrite the Entire paper?

This is a perfect option! Instead, you can look for sentences that don’t fit and eliminate them. You may also want to rewrite or rework certain sections of the paper to make it stronger- this process is called “refining.”

You might be tempted not to revise your essay if it seems like an impossible task: but remember that this is what revision is for! It’s okay to have a hard time with it- you’re not alone. The revision points are to make your paper stronger, evaluate the point you’re trying to make, and not give up when things get complicated.

You might also want to check comprehensive essay topics

Sample Essay

Contribution of technology in education -raw essay.

Technology is an integral part of our everyday lives. It has become a central component in the development and education of many people- from toddlers to college student, children to adult, and even among those who are illiterate or do not speak English as their first language. The use of technology for instruction allows educators to reach across cultural divides while providing tailored education to individual students based on their needs. Technology can be used in a classroom as an instructional tool- and it’s also incorporated into the design of teaching methods.

The use of technology in education can be traced back to the 1960s, when educators first began using television for instruction. During this period, the invention and popularization of VCRs allowed teachers to show videos on-demand while also making it possible for students to watch films in home that were previously unavailable or censored by social norms. This trend has continued with new innovations in technology. For example, electronic whiteboards have been used to teach kindergarten students basic arithmetic and algebra concepts while also enabling them to solve a screen problem.

Momentum has increased since the 1970’s- when computers were first introduced into classrooms- and it continues today as advancements continue to be made, which bring new opportunities to use technology for instruction. For example, online courses allow educators and students across the world to interact with one another without geographic constraints- making it possible for those who are otherwise unable to attend school because of their social or economic situation to access quality education.

Technology is often used as an instructional tool in classrooms today: many schools have laptops available for students to use during their lessons. This allows teachers to present information and demonstrate skills in new ways- such as interactive videos, simulations, or virtual labs. It also increases the amount of content they can teach due to availability on various online sources, which then provides more opportunities for personalized learning: some students might need assistance with math while others need help with reading comprehension.

The use of technology to teach a language also helps students gain skills and confidence in speaking it- which, in turn, leads them to continue studying on their own time as they are exposed to new vocabulary words through the course materials. In addition, technology can be used for assessment purposes: educators can create quizzes or tests that are proctored on the computer and then evaluate how their students have understood a lesson.

The use of technology in education has many benefits- from giving teachers more ways to reach each student with tailored instruction while also providing new opportunities for those who otherwise might not be able to take traditional courses because they can’t travel far enough to get to school.

It also allows for more assessment opportunities to be created, giving educators a better idea of how their students understand the material.

Role of Technology in Future Learning -Revised Essay

Technology is playing an increasingly important role in the way we learn and share information. Its use has helped educators personalize learning to meet individual student needs and give them new opportunities for assessment that didn’t exist before. The increased utilization of technology in education will continue helping more students receive quality instruction at all levels from pre-school to post-graduate.

Education will continue to rely on technology in the future: it is used in classrooms as an instructional tool and incorporated into teaching methods. Technology can be found in most schools today, with laptops being available for students’ use during their lessons so that teachers can present information and demonstrate skills in new ways. The use of technology to teach a language has also helped students gain skills and confidence in speaking it, motivating them to continue studying independently as they are exposed to new vocabulary words through the course materials.

In future learning, technology will assess educators to understand better how their students understand the material. These assessments will create a data-based approach to teaching, which is better than the current intuition-based system. Thus, the future is bright, courtesy of technological advancement.

In conclusion, technology plays an important role in education. It is used as an instructional tool and incorporated into the design of teaching methods in today’s classrooms, which helps students learn more efficiently. In most schools, laptops are available for student use during their lessons so teachers can present information and demonstrate skills in new ways. The increased utilization of technology will continue helping more students to receive quality instruction.

Weaknesses of the first essay- Contribution of technology in education

The first essay, at first glance, might seem ready for submission, but on a closer inspection, you will notice that it has:

• Instances of grammatical errors.
• It does not have a specific point that can be themed throughout the essay.
• Long sentences that might be hard to follow and understand despite having a full thought or idea.
• Unnecessary information that makes the essay long and tiresome to read.
• There are very short paragraphs, some with one sentence; a basic paragraph should have at least 3 sentences and 5-6 sentences on average.
• No clear topic sentences, concluding statements, and conclusion.

Strengths of the revised essay – Role of technology in future learning .

The second essay, titled “Role of technology in future learning,” is a revised version of the first essay titled “Contribution of technology in education.”

The writer improved on the following parts of the essay to make it look, read and feel better.

• The writer focused on the main point, which is- the role of technology in future learning. The title also had to be revised to help shape the main point. It is not necessary to change the title in your essay since it’s easy to miss your intended point entirely.
• The second essay is concise and straight to the point.
• The second essay has been corrected and is free from grammatical errors, punctuation, and spelling errors.

Revising an essay is an essential part of quality writing. You should ensure to edit your essay to achieve quality papers.

Before revising an essay, make sure you understand the dos and don’ts. This will ensure you don’t make the same mistake you made while writing the essay. In this way, you will be able to save on your time.

Finally, revising an essay is always a challenging task. However, you should know that you should be prepared for the task because you want quality paper.

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