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2024-25 Penn State Supplemental Essay – Prompt & Advice

August 12, 2024

With an acceptance rate still above 50%, it would be easy to misjudge how challenging the Penn State admissions landscape truly is. In fact, those entering the famed University Park campus sport mid-50 SATs of 1320-1450. They also boast an unweighted GPA range of 3.65-3.94 . Accordingly, successful applicants in 2024-25 should prepare to write a strong Penn State supplemental essay.

(Want to learn more about How to Get Into Penn State? Visit our blog entitled:  How to Get Into Penn State University: Admissions Data and Strategies  for all of the most recent admissions data as well as tips for gaining acceptance.)

In a competitive admissions environment, every piece of the Penn State application takes on a high level of importance. Therefore, it is vital that all Nittany Lion applicants dedicate a significant amount of time to this optional essay. Below is the lone PSU supplemental prompt for the 2024-25 admissions cycle along with our advice for composing a winning essay.

Penn State Supplemental Essay — Optional

This is your opportunity to share something about yourself that is not already reflected in your application or academic records. tell us something about yourself, your experiences, or activities that you believe would reflect positively on your ability to succeed at penn state. while the personal statement is not required, it is highly encouraged (650 words). .

This essay is technically “optional” but all serious applicants should view it as mandatory. Unlike many “optional” essays that may or may not apply to you (e.g. COVID impact, gap in education, gender identity, etc.), just about every applicant has at least one extracurricular or experience worth elaborating on. Note that Penn State does not require the Common App personal statement , so you can always choose to modify that essay for this prompt.

Let’s go over the two general angles that we most often see students take…

The activity/experience angle

Are there any activities on your application that are crying out for more explanation and detail? Which one is closest to your heart and most representative of your unique passions? Pick the option that will allow you to deliver additional detail that may be memorable to the admissions reader. Start this process by asking, “What is the most interesting and consequential moment I have experienced in my extracurricular activities? How will this experience—and what I learned—demonstrate my preparedness for and/or potential contributions to Penn State?”

For example, you may be a volunteer EMT and have compelling experiences to share—experiences that taught you how to remain calm under pressure, a quality you’ll bring with you to the classroom. Alternatively, perhaps you worked in a local restaurant and learned more about the lives of your undocumented coworkers, which inspired you to become involved in immigration-related issues and even complete a specialized research project. You believe your ability to remain open-minded and empathetic will allow to you better connect with others and experience deeper learning.

The more broad “about you” angle

Of course, this prompt has a wider scope than just an activity. Consider that the admissions reader is already familiar with your academic history, activities, and awards. What don’t they know, or, what could they understand on a deeper level? This could be a particular skill or talent or something about your character or personality. On the other hand, you may wish to speak more about your passions, hobbies, ideas, or beliefs. Any of those options are perfectly fine!

This one is intentionally open-ended so use this space to share your most cherished accomplishments or most winning attributes. The university itself is, in essence, inviting you to make a “closing argument” at the end of this admissions trial. Regardless of what you choose, be sure to discuss how your learnings/growth will positively impact your ability to do well at Penn State.

Get specific!

No matter which angle you choose, try to connect your past experiences with your future goals by citing Penn State-specific offerings or opportunities that you hope to take advantage of. Let’s go back to our previous immigration advocacy example—perhaps there’s a student group you hope to join, an immigration policy course you hope to take, etc.

How important is the Penn State supplemental essay?

The essay is not among the most important factors to the admissions committee. GPA and the rigor of one’s courses are at the top of the list. However, the essays can help push borderline applicants over the edge toward an acceptance.

Want Personalized Essay Assistance?

Lastly, if you are interested in working with one of College Transitions’ experienced and knowledgeable essay coaches as you craft your Penn State supplemental essay, we encourage you to  get a quote  today.

Looking for more writing-related resources? Consider checking out the following:

• Common App Essay Prompts
• 10 Instructive Common App Essay Examples
• College Application Essay Topics to Avoid
• How to Quickly Format Your Common App Essay
• Should I Complete Optional College Essays?
• How to Brainstorm a College Essay
• 25 Inspiring College Essay Topics
• “Why This College?” Essay Examples
• How to Write the Community Essay
• College Essay

Andrew Belasco

A licensed counselor and published researcher, Andrew's experience in the field of college admissions and transition spans two decades. He has previously served as a high school counselor, consultant and author for Kaplan Test Prep, and advisor to U.S. Congress, reporting on issues related to college admissions and financial aid.

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How to Write a Penn State Essay in 3 Steps

College Essays

If you want to go to Penn State , then the Penn State essay is one of your big chances to show how you’re different from other students in your application for admission . In order to really make this component of the application work to your advantage, you’ll need a solid strategy for writing a concise, unique, and persuasive Penn State essay!

Writing your Penn State admissions essay might seem intimidating at first, but we’re here to guide you through the process. This article will help you write a stellar Penn State essay by: 

• Explaining purpose of the Penn State Essay
• Outlining the three steps to writing a solid Penn State Essay
• Providing a breakdown of Penn State essay examples
• Giving you three practical tips for writing an exceptional essay

Let’s dive in!

The Penn State essay is an important part of your Penn State application because it can make you stand out from other applicants!

What’s the Penn State Essay?

The Penn State essay, sometimes also called the Penn State supplemental essay, is a 500 word written response included in the Penn State application for admission . 

The prompt for this essay invites applicants to tell the admissions committee about themselves. Here’s the prompt you’ll have to answer:

Please tell us something about yourself, your experiences, or activities that you believe would reflect positively on your ability to succeed at Penn State. This is your opportunity to tell us something about yourself that is not already reflected in your application or academic records. We suggest a limit of 500 words or fewer. 

This essay prompt is essentially asking applicants to write a response that is very similar to what is known as a personal statement. College admissions typically use an applicant’s personal statement to better understand who the applicant is as a person and what strengths they will bring to the university. 

In other words, the Penn State Essay response is an applicant’s chance to show what makes them unique in the admissions process. 

3 Steps to Answering The Penn State Essay Prompt

If we break down the pieces of what the Penn State prompt is asking, we can identify three main tasks that you need to complete in order to write a killer essay . These tasks are as follows: 

• Identify something about yourself (e.g. a skill, ability, character trait), one of your experiences, or an activity you have been involved in, and 
• Explain the meaning or significance of that aspect of yourself in order to
• Prove that you embody what it means to be a Penn State student. 

While whipping out a 500 word essay response that covers these topics may sound easy, it’s a bit trickier in practice. It’s important that you think carefully about your strategy and come up with a clear plan for your essay response. Remember: your essay is an important part of your admissions application, so you want to spend time getting it right. 

Now, we’re going to walk you through how to address each of these three major points in your essay in order to make admissions counselors sit up and take notice. 

Step 1: Select a Topic to Write About

To begin the process of drafting your Penn State essay, you need to select a meaningful attribute, experience, or activity that makes a positive case for your ability to succeed at Penn State . You need to identify these meaningful experiences or attributes because of the first part of the Penn State essay prompt, which states: 

Please tell us something about yourself, your experiences, or activities that you believe would reflect positively on your ability to succeed at Penn State. 

To do this, start by taking inventory of the character traits, experiences, or involvement in activities that you’re most proud of, passionate about, or are the most meaningful to you. We recommend you start by writing a list of the things that come to mind. If you want, you can divide it into categories based on character traits/abilities, experiences, and activities. As you put together this list, don’t worry about whether the things you’re coming up with are “good” or not — you’re just brainstorming ideas at this point!  

If you’re stuck and have no idea where to start, that’s okay, too. Try asking yourself these questions to get you started: 

• What is my favorite memory? And why? 
• What’s my favorite thing to do in the whole world? Why do I love it? 
• If my friends had to describe me in one word, what would they say?

Once you start jotting down ideas, you’ll probably find that you’re able to come up with quite a few. The traits, experiences, and activities that you list out can vary widely and come from different areas of your life, including experiences with friends and family, academic pursuits, extracurricular activities, work with community organizations and volunteerism, political activism, travels, strong memories from childhood, or challenges you’ve faced in life. The possibilities aren’t limited to the ones we just mentioned; this list is simply meant to give you a jump start for brainstorming. 

Once you’ve listed out all the meaningful traits/abilities, experiences, and activities that you can think of, evaluate them in order to select one item from the list that you will address in your Penn State essay. To narrow it down to one item, consider asking yourself the following questions: 

• Which of these items do I feel the strongest positive emotional connection to? 
• Which of these items am I the most proud of? 
• Which of these items could I tell a story about? 
• Which of these items makes me unique or different from other people? 

You don’t necessarily have to use these questions to select your essay topic, but if you find that you answer several of these questions with the same experience or activity, that might be a good clue that you should choose that item as the topic of your Penn State essay. 

Once you pick a topic, it's time to figure out what it says about you as a person. This essay is designed to help admissions counselors get to know you. 

Step 2: Think About What Your Topic Says About You 

Once you’ve selected a single character trait/ability, experience, or activity from your list, the second step of responding to the Penn State essay prompt is to tell a compelling story. 

You want to engage your reader while explaining what the trait/activity/characteristic you’ve chosen says about you as a person. 

To get started on this step, it’s a good idea to do some freewriting or brainstorming. Try to identify the ways in which the experience or activity you chose showcased a talent, skill, or ability you possess in a meaningful or valuable way. It’s important to be able to explain your perception of how this experience or activity shaped you into a person who will bring something positive to Penn State.

Here’s what we mean: say Katerina has decided that she wants to write about making the varsity squad for her school’s soccer team. In her freewrite, she writes about how the accomplishment makes her feel (proud, excited, enthusiastic), and she also writes a bit about the hard work it took for her to get there. Not only does she jot down ideas about going to the State tournament and making a game-winning goal, she also writes about how she missed making the squad in 9th grade, but instead of quitting, she got up an hour early every day over the summer to fit in extra practice. 

In this example, Katerina is trying to get a better understanding of why her topic is important to her, and what kind of story she can tell the admissions committee to help them understand her better. In this case, Katerina may decide to focus on how she didn’t give up and put in extra work to make her dreams come true...and it ended up paying off in a big way! 

Keep in mind that it doesn’t matter if the item you choose to write about is the most prestigious accomplishment from your résumé — you have the rest of your Penn State application to account for those accomplishments. Rather, the Penn State Essay is your time to tell the story of the real person behind your long list of accolades. If you can tailor this story to focus on a specific, detailed experience, activity, or positive attribute you possess, your essay will be more impactful.

Step 3: Tie Your Story Back to Penn State

After you’ve nailed down the way that you want to describe your uniqueness as an applicant, you need to define your understanding of what success at Penn State means to you . 

Why do you need to do this? Because of the instructions in the first sentence of the Penn State essay prompt, which states: 

Please tell us something about yourself, your experiences, or activities that you believe would reflect positively on your ability to succeed at Penn State . 

Penn State Admissions wants you to make a clear connection between your reflections on the experience you choose to write about and the opportunities for success that Penn State offers to its students. In order to make this connection effectively in your essay response, you need to explain how your story shows that you’re a perfect fit for Penn State. 

To get started, do your research on the culture, identity, and opportunities provided for students at Penn State . Use any information you may have gathered from visits to Penn State’s campus, attending admissions events, talking with current students or alumni, or perusing Penn State’s website to help you construct a complete picture of the culture of Penn State and what the school has to offer. 

Also, dig into specific opportunities you want to take advantage of while you’re attending Penn State. What does Penn State offer you that no other college can give you? Maybe that’s a specific degree plan, unique courses, or even a specific professor you want to work with. The more specific you are about how you’ll fit into the Penn State community, the better. 

So let’s go back to Katerina. Katerina wants to be an engineer, and in her research, she learned that Penn State’s BEST Center is working on improving battery technology. Since Katerina wants to work in the tech field, the BEST Center will help her prepare for her future career. 

So now Katerina needs to use her story about her soccer experience to explain how she’ll succeed as an engineering student at Penn State . One way she might do that is by saying that engineering is a demanding degree, and the persistence she learned on the soccer field will set her up for doing well as a Penn State engineering student. She could even take it a step further and explain that the creative problem solving she developed in her soccer training will help her succeed as she researches new battery technology as a part of the BEST Center, too.

This definition of “success” should inform how you tell the story of yourself in your Penn State essay. The admissions committee doesn’t expect every applicant to define success in the same way. In fact, Penn State admissions wants to see that you’ve really thought through your potential to be a good fit as a student at Penn State based on a thorough understanding of what Penn State has to offer a student with your past experiences and vision for the future. You should be able to define your path to success and explain how Penn State will help you get there.  

If you're still not sure what your Penn State essay should look like, take a look at our example essay below.

A Penn State Essay Example

There are many different ways that a Penn State essay can be successful but, in general, excellent essays talk about a specific experience, tell a memorable story, and connect the story of that experience to your definition of success at Penn State. 

To help you understand what these moves can look like in practice, let’s check out Penn State essay examples: 

Every morning during the spring of my junior year of high school, my alarm went off at 4:45 a.m. Due to the coronavirus pandemic, many people in my hometown were laid off from their jobs struggling to make ends meet. My family owns a farm, and we grow many different types of vegetables and have laying hens, too. So when my morning chores were completed, I would jump in the truck with my dad and my sister to drive into town and deliver free vegetables and eggs to families in need. 

My family could help others because of our farm. That made me think: what if other people could grow their own food and then share what they had with others? That’s why I started an online, community-based agriculture program at my school. I wanted to help others learn how to grow their own food, then share that food with others in their community. 

While the group started out small with just a few students, within three weeks, 40 of my classmates joined in. Together, we organized a seed, plant, and garden tool drive that helped give 70 families in our town enough supplies to start their own small gardens. And many of my classmates have committed to growing gardens of their own! This experience taught me how important agriculture is, but also how agriculture can directly impact the well-being of those around me. 

As a major in community, environment, and development at Penn State, I would have the opportunity to learn about and envision strategies for helping consumers in local communities become aware of and educated about the social and economic benefits to supporting their local farmers. By taking supplemental courses in computer programming, I would prepare myself to create user-friendly online spaces that are dedicated to sharing information about local food systems with consumers in local communities. Ultimately, I believe that Penn State will help me achieve my dream of starting a nationwide, online program to help people in undeserved communities start community agriculture programs of their own. 

Now, let’s break down what this example essay does well. In this essay, the writer provides a clear definition of what success at Penn State will look like for them as a student. This essay emphasizes the student’s personal goals, knowledge of the opportunities Penn State has to offer, and commitment to investing in the Penn State community and society at large . That will definitely make an impact with admissions counselors! 

This student also helps admissions counselors get to know them by telling a story that includes specific details and vivid imagery from an experience that other applicants may not have . The essay helps the reader get a better sense of who this person is, their background, and the things they care about by telling the short story about delivering homegrown care packages to people in the community. This story will help the admissions committee remember the applicant and will set them apart from other applicants as well. 

But most essays aren’t perfect, and this one isn’t, either. One thing this essay response can improve upon is the way in which it connects the student’s idea of success to Penn State . In the last paragraph, the student should focus more on how specific opportunities provided by Penn State’s agriculture department, like its collaborative research into sustainable agriculture , will help the student achieve their goals. 

All in all, t his Penn State essay provides a good example of how to address all aspects of the essay prompt , be clear and concise in your writing, and reveal important aspects of who you are as a person that your other application materials may not show. 

3 Tips for Writing an Excellent Penn State Essay

You want your Penn State essay to persuade admissions that you’ll be a fantastic addition to Penn State’s incoming class. To help you present yourself in a way that Penn State admissions will remember, check out our three tips for writing an outstanding Penn State essay to help you stand out from the crowd. 

Tip 1: Be Specific

If you want your Penn State essay to be memorable, you need to be specific . Throwing out a bunch of abstract character traits or claims as to why you’ll be successful at Penn State won’t help your essay stand out. Instead, give your essay a coherent focus by selecting one or two related character traits, experiences, or activities that show your ability to be successful at Penn State. 

The point of the Penn State essay is to shoot for depth, not breadth. You already showcase your grades, coursework, and awards through other parts of your Penn State application. The essay is the time to reveal more about who you are and what you will bring to Penn State by showing how you’ve been successful in a past situation. Choosing a specific experience and diving into the details of it will show that you’re more than just a list of achievements on a résumé—you’re a real human being. 

Tip 2: Give Concrete Examples

When writing your Penn State essay, examples are a crucial form of support. When you select one or two specific elements  to focus on in your essay, you need to be able to elaborate on those things through specific and engaging examples. 

For instance, you don’t want to simply say, “My adaptability to a range of situations predicts my potential for success as a student at Penn State.” An admissions committee may read that sentence and ask, What makes you so adaptable? What activities or experiences demonstrate evidence of your adaptability? What has your adaptability helped you achieve or accomplish? 

Instead of making a vague, abstract claim like the one in the paragraph above, you need to be more specific, which you can do by providing an example . 

Here’s how a writer could elaborate on their adaptability in their essay: 

Starting your senior year of high school at a new school probably sounds daunting, but after moving seven times in seven years, I was prepared for the ins and outs of being the new kid on my last first day of school. Moving so many times due to my father’s work in the military has given me the opportunity to experience different cultures, learn new languages, and cultivate the ability to make meaningful connections with new people who are very different from me in a matter of minutes. During my senior year at a new school, I used these skills to mobilize my fellow students for a school wide walkout in support of DACA. 

Do you see the difference? The example above gives specific details of what life experience led this student to become adaptable rather than simply making an unsupported claim .

This example is also memorable because it uses vivid language. When you read it, you can imagine the student traveling the world, confidently stepping foot into a new school, and building connections with fellow students for social action. 

In your Penn State essay, examples like this one can be used to make meaningful connections between your vision for your life as a student and a clear definition of success . Using examples in this way will make your essay memorable and unique. 

Tip 3: Don’t Rehash Your Résumé

It’s tempting to rehash the list of accomplishments on your résumé in your Penn State essay, especially if your résumé is packed full of prestigious awards and experiences. However, keep in mind that there are other areas of the Penn State application that explicitly ask for this information. 

When the admissions committee sits down to read your essay response, they’re looking to learn something new about you—something that your résumé can’t tell them . So, instead of listing off accomplishments or stating the facts of what you’ve achieved, pick an aspect of who you are that might not be super apparent. That can include personality traits (maybe you’re really funny), unique experiences you’ve had (maybe you rescued kittens one summer!), or something else that makes you uniquely you. 

Just remember: your essay is a chance for you to make a powerful impression on your readers, so don’t waste it! 

Next Steps 

If you’re applying to Penn State, you need to make sure you’re meeting some of the school’s other admissions requirements . Here’s a guide to the Penn State admissions process to get you started . You can also learn more about the Penn State ACT and Penn State SAT standards , too. 

Are you looking for more college essay tips and tricks? Don’t worry: we’ve got 13 more for you! 

If you’re applying to other schools besides Penn State, y ou may find that you have to write “Why This College?” essays . If you’re not sure what those are, be sure to check out this article.

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Ashley Sufflé Robinson has a Ph.D. in 19th Century English Literature. As a content writer for PrepScholar, Ashley is passionate about giving college-bound students the in-depth information they need to get into the school of their dreams.

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Does Penn State see the Common Application Personal Statement?

I am applying to Penn State Schreyer’s Honors College. Is it okay for me to reuse my Common Application Personal Statement Essay for the supplementary essays?

Also, should I write an essay for Penn State’s optional personal statement essay?

Pennsylvania State University (Penn State) Supplemental Essays Guide: 2021-2022

Not sure how to approach the Penn State essay prompts? With tips from a Penn State graduate, CollegeAdvisor.com’s guide to the Penn State supplemental essays will show you how to write engaging Penn State essays and maximize your chances of admission.

Penn State Essay Guide Quick Facts: 

• Penn State has an acceptance rate of 54%— U.S. News ranks Penn State as a more selective school. 
• We recommend answering all Penn State supplemental essays—optional Penn State essay prompts included— comprehensively and thoughtfully.

What is Penn State known for?

Founded in 1855 as an agricultural college, Penn State University is now a top-ranking research university located in Centre County, Pennsylvania. It ranks among the top 25 U.S. research universities, with 18 of its disciplines listed among the top ten research expenditures nationally. These disciplines include materials science, mechanical engineering, psychology, and electrical engineering. 

Penn State University operates with a multi-campus system, boasting 20 undergraduate campuses spread across Pennsylvania. The University’s mission is one of teaching, research, and public service. The school has a large student body, with approximately 40,000 undergraduate students. In-state tuition comes in at just under $20,000 per year, while out-of-state tuition is just over $35,000 per year. 

You can apply to Penn State through the MyPennState application or through the Common App . Students will also submit their Penn State essays either through MyPennState or through the Common App. 

Does Penn State require any supplemental essays?

In short, no. The Penn State application includes one optional essay. It’s essentially a personal statement, much like the CommonApp essay. While this Penn State supplemental essay is optional, we highly recommend responding to the Penn State essay prompt. Students’ Penn State essays can make a major difference in the admissions process. 

You should complete each part of every college application thoroughly, optional or not. The only exception to this rule, however, is if the part of the application does not apply to you. For example, you need not include a letter from a varsity coach if you did not play on a varsity team in high school. You also shouldn’t feel pressured to submit additional information about your grades or scores unless you faced any mitigating circumstances. 

How many essays does Penn State require?

There are no required Penn State application essays beyond the Common App essay. However, completing the optional Penn State supplemental essay will help you submit a well-rounded application. Students who submit strong Penn State essays will have a better chance of acceptance, so you should write the optional Penn State essay. 

Apart from your interview, your Penn State application essay is your only chance to speak directly to Penn State admissions about why you are a good fit for the university. Keep in mind that the admissions team will review thousands of Penn State application essays, so you should do all you can to help yours stand out. The best Penn State essays will use specific details to show why a student would succeed at Penn State. 

What are Penn State’s essays?

The Penn State supplemental essay is essentially a personal statement. It is designed to give Penn State admissions a sense of who you are beyond your grades and test scores. Once again, students who write strong Penn State essays will have a better chance of getting admitted. After all, well-written Penn State essays can help the admissions team learn more about what makes you special. 

As you approach your Penn State application essay, think about your identity. What is important to you? How do you want to impact the world? Finally, how will you enrich Penn State’s campus? The best Penn State application essays will answer some or all of these questions. 

Your response to the Penn State essay prompt should transform a two-dimensional application consisting of grades and test scores into a 3D representation of who you are as a student, learner, and community member. The best Penn State essays will give the admissions committee a vivid picture of who a student would be on campus. 

How do I write Penn State’s supplemental essays?

We have provided the Penn State essay prompt below. We’ve also included a full breakdown of how to approach this Penn State supplemental essay. 

The Penn State application essay is a chance to present your application narrative—that is, the story that your application tells to Penn State admissions. Your application narrative should give your readers a clear sense of who you are and what matters to you. This narrative should also remain cohesive throughout your application. For example, if you chose to take AP French because you want to be a diplomat in your family’s country of origin Cameroon, you might expand on this dream in your Penn State supplemental essay.

If you are having trouble constructing your application narrative in your Penn State application essay, then check out our article, “A Deep Dive into the Personal Narrative.”  

Penn State Supplemental Essay (Optional):

Please tell us something about yourself, your experiences, or activities that you believe would reflect positively on your ability to succeed at Penn State. This is your opportunity to tell us something about yourself that is not already reflected in your application or academic records. We suggest a limit of 500 words or fewer.

This Penn State supplemental essay asks why you would be a good fit at Penn State. It also asks you to tell a story about yourself that isn’t clear from the rest of your application. 

What makes you special? More importantly, what is something that makes you special and also makes you a good fit for Penn State? Strong Penn State application essays will answer these questions by telling a clear, specific, and compelling story. 

Let’s break down this Penn State essay prompt. First, why do you think you would succeed at Penn State? A list may be helpful here. Is it your innovative mind, your knack for scientific research, your skills on the football field? Additionally, your answer to this Penn State essay prompt should be specific to Penn State.

Do some research

To find specific details to use in your Penn State essay, do some research. Strong Penn State application essays will cite specific details about Penn State. You should learn about each college on your list and have a strong reason for applying; don’t just choose colleges based on prestige, location, or tuition cost. The best Penn State essays will discuss specific programs, courses, and student groups only available at Penn State. Want to learn more about student life at Penn State? Check out our article, “Student Life at Penn State.”

Once you’ve done some research, spend time with your list of reasons why you’d succeed at Penn State. As you refine this list, try to connect your skills to programs and resources that Penn State offers. The more specific you can be, the better!

Now that you have outlined why you are a good fit for Penn State, look at each skill you listed. How did you develop that skill? Did it come from your high school mock trial team? Or, did you learn it from a particular community? Did you change your perspective after a major life event? What’s the story behind each skill on your list?

Strong Penn State application essays can come from anywhere, so don’t limit yourself as you brainstorm. Look at these stories and choose the one that most shows why you would succeed at Penn State. Of course, make sure this story doesn’t already appear in your application. Remember, the best Penn State application essays will show your reader something new.

Start writing

Now that you have a topic for this Penn State supplemental essay, it’s time to start writing. Remember that you are telling a story, not writing a research paper. The strongest Penn State application essays will be the most organic, so don’t be afraid to let your voice shine through. If you are a funny and lighthearted person, let your humor seep into this Penn State supplemental essay. If your story is somber and at times painful, don’t be afraid to describe that pain in your Penn State application essay. Your Penn State essay is your chance to make your application three-dimensional, so let your humanity shine through. Use your essay to breathe life into your Penn State application. 

This Penn State supplemental essay has a recommended maximum of 500 words. Don’t go over the word limit. Keeping your Penn State application essay under the limit will not only show that you carefully read the Penn State essay prompt, but also that you are a clear and concise writer. 

Penn State application essays significantly under 500 words are technically fine. However, if your draft is coming in short, ask yourself if you have responded to both parts of the prompt. The first half of your Penn State supplemental essay should tell a story that shows why you’d succeed at Penn State; the second half of your Penn State essay should explain why your story makes you a good fit for the university. Both parts of your Penn State application essay should come in at around 250 words. So, if your Penn State essay is much shorter than 500 words, make sure your story is robust and your reasoning sound.

Now that you have your Penn State supplemental essay topic, how do you start writing?

Writing the first words of your Penn State supplemental essay can be the hardest part of the process. Sometimes, the easiest way to combat writer’s block is to just write without fear or expectation. Try an automatic writing exercise to begin drafting the story you have chosen for this Penn State supplemental essay. Simply fill in the first sentence of the prompt, “An experience or activity that would reflect on my ability to succeed at Penn State is….” Then, see where your Penn State essay takes you. 

While you will not use this draft as your final Penn State essay (and you certainly won’t use that cookie-cutter first sentence) this exercise is a great way to get your ideas flowing. After you have written for 5-10 minutes, look over your work. What stands out to you from this first pass? Often, the crux of a story reveals itself in a free write. Maybe there’s a sentence near the end of your writing that would actually make the perfect introduction. Maybe there’s another that connects two crucial ideas. Mine your writing for the core structure of your Penn state supplemental essay. Then, highlight those key structural sections, use them as your outline, and take a second pass at this Penn State essay. 

Talk it out

If free-writing isn’t your speed, don’t worry! For many writers, oral storytelling can be helpful when it comes to crafting a narrative. Perhaps it is easiest to tell your Penn State essay aloud, either to a family member or into a voice recorder. Then, transcribe your recording and mine its contents for the key points of your Penn State application essay. For more writing exercise ideas, check out our article, “Determining a College Essay Topic: Reflection Exercises to Try.”

Once you have your draft, the next step is to revise. As the structure of your Penn State supplemental essay emerges, revise and refine it. Then, come back to the Penn State essay prompt—are you telling your story compellingly and succinctly? Do you discuss a skill you have that will help you succeed at Penn State? Do you allow yourself enough time to connect the skill you describe to how it will help you succeed at Penn State? Does this essay round out the narrative present in the rest of your application? If the answer to each of these questions is a resounding yes, then your essay is likely almost complete. You might then hand this Penn State supplemental essay draft to another reader who can catch any lingering grammatical or spelling errors. 

Essay Draft Key Questions

• Does your Penn State essay tell a compelling story?
• Do you discuss details not present in the rest of your application?
• Does your essay show why you’d be a good fit at Penn State?
• Do you show that you’ve done your research on Penn State and its offerings? 

Additional tips for the Penn State essay

• Start early: Though your Penn State essay will be relatively short, that doesn’t make it easy to write. The Penn State essay prompt requires you to think critically about yourself as an applicant. Ideally, you should begin outlining and drafting your Penn State supplemental essay the summer before your application is due. If you are having trouble preparing all of your application materials, check out our article, “Preparing Your Senior Fall Checklist.”
• Essay Checklist: Write out each step required to complete this Penn State supplemental essay. Use the guide above. If you choose to make lists for each step—why you are a good fit for Penn State, what experiences or activities helped you develop those skills, et cetera—then completing those lists should also be on the checklist. Your checklist should also include answering both parts of the prompt—your story and why that story makes you a good fit for Penn State. If you follow a detailed checklist, you’ll be sure to write a strong Penn State supplemental essay.
• Edits: It is always a good idea to have a second pair of eyes on your writing. Choose someone you trust who understands the goals of your Penn State application essay and respects your voice and vision. If you are an oral thinker, you might talk your initial Penn State essay ideas through with this person. However, make sure they will only help you further your own thinking rather than impose their own. No matter where you bring an outside reader into the process, they should definitely read your final Penn State application essay to check for spelling, punctuation, and grammar. You might also hand them your essay checklist and ask whether they think you completed each step. 

Penn State Supplemental Essay: Final Thoughts

Do not be discouraged by the Penn State supplemental essay! Though it may seem like a tall task, breaking your Penn State essay into smaller, manageable chunks will make it less daunting. 

Ultimately, writing the Penn State essay will only help you. The skills this essay helps you develop in narrative building and constructing your literary voice will be crucial throughout the application cycle and in your college years. Finally, remember to have fun! You are being asked to envision yourself on Penn State’s campus and imagine how you may succeed there. This is an opportunity to be imaginative and creative. Make the most of it! 

This 2021-2022 essay guide on Penn State was written by Saphia Suarez. Want more help responding to the Penn State University essay prompt? Click here to create your free CollegeAdvisor.com account or schedule a free advising assessment with an Admissions Expert by calling (844) 343-6272.

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Your chance of acceptance, your chancing factors, extracurriculars, does penn state have an optional essay.

Hi everyone! I've been working on my college applications lately. For those who have applied to Penn State, is there an optional essay that I should be aware of? And if so, what should I write about? I would really appreciate any advice on this!

Yes, Penn State does have an optional essay in their application. The optional essay is a chance for you to provide additional information you think would benefit the admissions committee while considering your application. It is not a required component, but it can be a valuable opportunity to showcase your personality and explain any inconsistencies in your application that may need clarification.

Some areas you might want to address in the optional essay could be:

1. Any extenuating circumstances that might have affected your academic performance, like health issues, personal challenges, or family situations. This is your chance to give context to your application.

2. Unique skills, perspectives, or experiences you can bring to the campus community which aren't covered elsewhere in your application.

3. A specific academic interest, passion, or career goal that you'd like to explore further at Penn State.

4. Activities or accomplishments outside of school that demonstrate your character, work ethic, or leadership abilities.

Remember to be concise and focus on topics that add value to your overall application. The essay should effectively convey information about you that the admissions committee would not be able to glean from other parts of your application, such as grades or test scores.

Take this opportunity to be more personal and let your voice shine through, while keeping your essay well-organized and focused on the subject at hand. Ultimately, the optional essay is a great opportunity to allow the admissions committee to get a fuller understanding of who you are as a candidate, as well as any unique circumstances or qualities you may have, so use it to your advantage!

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CollegeVine’s Q&A seeks to offer informed perspectives on commonly asked admissions questions. Every answer is refined and validated by our team of admissions experts to ensure it resonates with trusted knowledge in the field.

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Admissions Requirements for First-Year Students

The minimum high school requirements for Penn State admission are outlined below. These requirements apply to all students who are interested in pursuing a degree at Penn State. Depending upon what type of applicant you are, you may also have to meet additional requirements. Please review all applicable requirements prior to applying for admission.

High School Requirements for a Four-Year Degree

The below chart outlines the minimum high school academic requirements for admission to a four-year program by units of study. In most high school curricula one unit is equal to one year of work.

Category 1:

Majors in these colleges at University Park:

Smeal College of Business

College of Earth and Mineral Sciences

College of Engineering

College of Information Sciences and Technology

Eberly College of Science

Majors at other campuses:

All Business programs

Engineering/Engineering Technology at Erie and Harrisburg

Science at Altoona, Abington, Berks, Erie, Harrisburg, and Lehigh Valley

Category 2:

All other four-year majors at the University and the Division of Undergraduate Studies

*Math Requirement:

Some colleges and majors require the completion of additional math in high school in order to be eligible for admission. Statistics does not meet the math requirement for those programs.

**World Language Requirement:

Two units in a single world language other than English are required. American Sign Language can be used to satisfy the World Language requirement for admission.

A student may be admitted with fewer than two units in a world language other than English but must correct this deficiency by the time they graduate from Penn State. This deficiency may be corrected by passing one three-credit or four-credit college-level world language course, by earning transferable credits from another institution, or by demonstrating proficiency equivalent to two units of high school world language study.

High School Requirements for a Two-Year Degree

The below chart outlines the minimum high school academic requirements for admission to a two-year program by units of study. In most high school curricula one unit is equal to one year of work.

Information for Applicants with a GED

If you did not graduate from high school and earned a GED, official high school transcripts through the last year you completed AND an official GED transcript are required.

All high school and GED transcripts must be sent directly to Penn State from the high school (educational institution of origin) or GED testing center to be considered official. Students can obtain their official GED through the Department of Education in the state from which the GED was received.

The following links are helpful in acquiring the GED transcript:

GED Testing Service

Pennsylvania GED transcript request form

The Undergraduate Admissions Office will review each applicant's high school coursework and/or GED individually when considering a student for admission.

Adult Learner Applicant with a GED

Adult learners are required to send a GED transcript only. Please review Penn State’s definition of an adult learner to determine what you will need to include with your application.

Additional Requirements for Specific Programs

Some of Penn State’s programs have additional application requirements. Review the programs below to determine if you need to prepare additional materials.

Acting BFA plus icon

Applicants need to submit a prescreen to complete the application. More information is available on the College of Arts and Architecture website .

Graphic Design plus icon

Applicants need to submit Evidence of Creative Work to complete the application. More information is available at the College of Arts and Architecture website .

Millennium Scholars Program plus icon

Applicants must submit essay question responses and recommendation letters. More information is available at the Millennium Scholars Program website .

Music plus icon

Applicants must schedule a School of Music audition to complete the application. More information is available on the Arts & Architecture website .

Musical Theatre plus icon

Applicants must submit a prescreen to complete the application. More information is available on the Arts & Architecture website .

Premedical-Medical BS/MD plus icon

Applicants must submit a one-page resume and responses to program questions within the application. SAT/ACT scores are highly encouraged. More information is available on the Eberly College of Science website .

Professional Golf Management plus icon

Applicants must present evidence of a playing proficiency reflected in a handicap of 12 or lower. Verification may be confirmed by a member of the PGA or a High School Golf Coach. More information is available on the Health and Human Development website .

Schreyer Honors College plus icon

Applicants must submit essays, responses to short answer questions, and recommendation letters. Applicants applying before November 1 may also participate in an optional interview. More information is available at the Schreyer Honors College website .

Theatre, BFA plus icon

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Essays and Short Answer Prompts

The Penn application process includes a personal essay —which is sent to most schools you apply to—as well as a few short answer prompts . We read your words carefully, as they are yet another window into how you think, what you value, and how you see the world. Through your writing, we get a glimpse of what you might bring to our community—including your voice and creativity. 

Remember, you are the expert on your story. This is an opportunity for you to reflect and understand who you are now, and who you want to be in the future. You have the agency to choose the information you want to share. This is your story: your experiences, your ideas, your perspective.   

A Few Writing Tips

• Review the prompts thoroughly.  Be sure you’re answering the question or prompt being asked. Topics are chosen because the Admissions Committee wants to know specific things about you. If you don’t address them directly, we are left to make decisions regarding your application with incomplete information. 
• Consider your response carefully.  We understand that you may be writing responses for different schools and you may want to reuse material, but be sure to read through your response to make sure it is relevant to the prompt. 
• Double-check your writing.  Give yourself time to revisit your response. Try to avoid rushing your writing process so you have time to revise your work. Ultimately, it is up to you to polish and proofread your writing before you submit. 
• Do your research. Are there classes you’re eager to take? Research opportunities you’d love to pursue? A group or club you want to be a part of? This kind of specificity shows us you’re serious about Penn and have thought about how you’d spend your time here. 

2024-25 Short Answer and Essay Prompts

When answering these prompts, be precise when explaining both why you are applying to Penn and why you have chosen to apply to that specific undergraduate school. Some of our specialized programs will have additional essays to complete, but the  Penn short answer prompts should address your single-degree or single-school choice.  

• Write a short thank-you note to someone you have not yet thanked and would like to acknowledge. (We encourage you to share this note with that person, if possible, and reflect on the experience!) (150-200 words, only required for first-year applicants) 
• How will you explore community at Penn? Consider how Penn will help shape your perspective, and how your experiences and perspective will help shape Penn. (150-200 words) 
• The school-specific prompt is unique to the school to which you are applying. (For example, all applicants applying to the College of Arts and Sciences will respond to the prompt under the “College of Arts and Sciences” section). Considering the undergraduate school you have selected for your single-degree option, please respond to your school-specific prompt below.  

Transfer Essay (required for all transfer applicants): Please explain your reasons for transferring from your current institution and what you hope to gain by transferring to another institution. (4150 characters) 

Undergraduate School-Specific Short Answer Prompts

For students applying to coordinated dual-degree and specialized programs, please answer this question about your single-degree school choice; your interest in the coordinated dual-degree or specialized program may be addressed through the program-specific essay.  

Penn Nursing intends to meet the health needs of a global, multicultural world by preparing its students to impact healthcare through advancing science. How will you contribute to our mission of promoting equity in healthcare and how will Penn Nursing contribute to your future nursing goals? (150-200 words)

To help inform your response, applicants are encouraged to learn more about Penn Nursing’s mission and how we promote equity in healthcare here . This information will help you develop a stronger understanding of our values and how they align with your own goals and aspirations.

The flexible structure of The College of Arts and Sciences’ curriculum is designed to inspire exploration, foster connections, and help you create a path of study through general education courses and a major. What are you curious about and how would you take advantage of opportunities in the arts and sciences? (150-200 words) 

To help inform your response, applicants are encouraged to learn more about the  academic offerings within the College of Arts and Sciences .  This information will help you develop a stronger understanding of how the study of the liberal arts aligns with your own goals and aspirations. 

Wharton prepares its students to make an impact by applying business methods and economic theory to real-world problems, including economic, political, and social issues.  Please reflect on a current issue of importance to you and share how you hope a Wharton education would help you to explore it.  (150-200 words) 

To help inform your response, applicants are encouraged to learn more about  the foundations of a Wharton education . This information will help you better understand what you could learn by studying at Wharton and what you could do afterward. 

Penn Engineering prepares its students to become leaders in technology by combining a strong foundation in the natural sciences and mathematics with depth of study in focused disciplinary majors. Please share how you plan to pursue your engineering interests at Penn. (150-200 words)

To help inform your response, applicants are encouraged to learn more about Penn Engineering and its mission to prepare students for global leadership in technology here . This information will help you develop a stronger understanding of academic pathways within Penn Engineering and how they align with your goals and interests.

Coordinated Dual Degree and Specialized Program Essay Prompts

For students applying to coordinated dual-degree and specialized programs, please answer the program-specific essay below. 

** Numbers marked with double asterisks indicate a character count that only applies to transfer students applying through Common App.  

Discuss how your interests align with the Digital Media Design (DMD) program at the University of Pennsylvania? (400-650 words / 3575 characters**)

We encourage you to learn more about the DMD: Digital Media Design Program .

The Huntsman Program supports the development of globally minded scholars who become engaged citizens, creative innovators, and ethical leaders in the public, private, and non-profit sectors in the United States and internationally. What draws you to a dual-degree program in business and international studies, and how would you use what you learn to contribute to a global issue where business and international affairs intersect? (400-650 words) 

The LSM program aims to provide students with a fundamental understanding of the life sciences and their management with an eye to identifying, advancing, and implementing innovations. What issues would you want to address using the understanding gained from such a program? Note that this essay should be distinct from your single degree essay. (400-650 words) 

• Explain how you will use the M&T program to explore your interest in business, engineering, and the intersection of the two. (400-650 words) 
• Describe a problem that you solved that showed leadership and creativity. (250 words) 

Discuss your interest in nursing and health care management. How might Penn's coordinated dual-degree program in nursing and business help you meet your goals? (400-650 words) 

How do you envision your participation in the Vagelos Integrated Program in Energy Research (VIPER) furthering your interests in energy science and technology? Please include any past experiences (ex. academic, research, or extracurricular) that have led to your interest in the program. Additionally, please indicate why you are interested in pursuing dual degrees in science and engineering and which VIPER majors are most interesting to you at this time. (400-650 words) 

Sharing Additional Information

To be your own best advocate, you may give our Admissions Committee more context about you by sharing additional information in your college application. While this is not required, it can help give admissions officers a fuller picture of who you are if you are concerned about any missing information or context. Consider the following guiding questions as you decide to share any additional information:

• Is there additional context you want to provide about how your time is spent outside of the classroom?
• Do you have a long commute to school, or responsibilities within your home or community that may prevent you from engaging in certain activities?
• Has there been a big change in your life that has impacted your grades or participation in activities?
• Is there missing context about your school that you want to provide? 

Which program are you applying to?

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March 29, 2024

Whatever You Do, Do Not Leave the Law School Optional Essay Blank!

Many law schools invite applicants to share more about themselves through an optional essay. 

For example, the University of Pennsylvania Law School provides the following optional essay prompts:

• These are the core strengths that make Penn Carey Law the best place to receive a rigorous, collaborative, and engaging legal education: genuine integration with associated disciplines; transformative, forward-looking faculty scholarship; highly-regarded experiential learning through clinics and our pro bono pledge; innovative, hands-on global engagement; and a manifest commitment to professional development and collegiality. These qualities define Penn Carey Law. What defines you? How do your goals and values match Penn Carey Law’s core strengths? 
• Penn Carey Law is committed to achieving an expansive and inclusive law school community that brings a diverse range of ideas, experiences, and perspectives to our classrooms. Tell us how your lived experience informs who you are today. 
• Describe a significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. 
• What strength or quality do you have that most people might not see or recognize? 
• What don’t we see in your application file that you would like to share with the Admissions Committee? 
• If you do not think that your academic record or standardized test scores accurately reflect your ability to succeed in law school, please tell us why.

Are these essays truly optional ? Technically, yes, they are; it says so right there in the name. However, the only truly optional essay here is the one about your academic record or standardized test scores. If you don’t feel that those reflect your ability to succeed in law school, take the opportunity to explain why in an essay. If you believe your grades and standardized test scores are a good measure of how successful you’ll be as a student, it is okay to skip that prompt (and others like it). 

Completing your law school application is a very one-dimensional process, but you are a three-dimensional human being, with at least two decades of life experiences. The personal statement was your opportunity to let the committee know why you want to go to law school. After that, applicants often run out of steam (or ideas) and skip writing any additional essays, hoping that the word “optional” means “it’s okay to opt out.” But it doesn’t. If you want to get into a school, take every opportunity to tell the admissions committee more about yourself. Failure to respond to the “optional” essay prompts can seem as though you are saying you have nothing else interesting to offer to the law school community.

Here are a few tips for making your optional essays more impactful:

1. Brainstorm before you write.

After you read the schools’ optional essay prompts, start by brainstorming all possible ideas and situations that might make good content for an essay. Think about your college career, volunteer work, employment, and family and personal life. Which events, experiences, and achievements would you like the school to know about that aren’t discussed elsewhere in your application? Then, decide which of those events, experiences, or achievements make the most sense for each essay.

2. Follow the directions. 

Most optional essays are short – about one page, double-spaced. Be sure to read each school’s instructions carefully, and don’t exceed the word or length limit. The length of your optional essay should not rival that of your personal statement.

3. Show, don’t tell. 

The biggest mistake applicants make is responding to an essay question without fully illustrating what they are talking about. In other words, give the reader some detail about what happened so they can picture it. Remember, you are trying with your essay to help the adcom see you as a three-dimensional person. It is harder to say no to a person!  

4. Don’t repeat yourself. 

Don’t write about the same things you shared in your personal essay or elsewhere in the application. This is your opportunity to continue your narrative, not repeat it. Examples you offer can be from your personal or professional experience.

Optional essays give you an opportunity to share more about yourself with the admissions committee. Putting in the time necessary to answer the optional essay questions effectively will serve you well by adding more depth to your application. Don’t skip them!

Looking for guidance on how to write an optional essay that will boost your chances of acceptance? Schedule a free consultation to discuss your law school application.

Sadie Polen has more than ten years of experience in higher education. She reviewed statements of purpose, personal statements, and resumes for political and public service opportunities and made candidate selections for elite programs at Harvard University. She also has experience advising individuals on their career and post-graduation plans. Sadie holds a BS from UC Davis, an EdM from Harvard, and a DEI certificate from Cornell. Want Sadie to help you get Accepted? Click here to get in touch .

Related Resources:

• Advice for Applicants: Moving from 2023 to 2024 , podcast Episode 557
• Navigating the Law School Admissions Process , podcast Episode 550
• Four Ways to Highlight Your Strengths in Your Application Essays

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2 Successful Penn State Essay Examples

What’s covered:, essay example 1 – calligraphy, essay example 2 – collaborative learning, where to get feedback on your essay .

Penn State University is a selective research university. Writing a strong essay can help your application stand out. In this post, we’ll go over an essay a real student submitted to Penn State University and outline their strengths and areas of improvement. (Names and identifying information have been changed, but all other details are preserved).

Please note: Looking at examples of real essays students have submitted to colleges can be very beneficial to get inspiration for your essays. You should never copy or plagiarize from these examples when writing your own essays. Colleges can tell when an essay isn’t genuine and will not view students favorably if they plagiarized. 

Read our Penn State essay breakdown to get a comprehensive overview of this year’s supplemental prompts.

Prompt: Please tell us something about yourself, your experiences, or activities that you believe would reflect positively on your ability to succeed at Penn State. This is your opportunity to tell us something about yourself that is not already reflected in your application or academic records. (500 words)

When I started high school, I often had crumpled wads of paper sprinkled around my room and pens all over my desk. I was learning how to write in calligraphy but clearly, it was not going well. One stroke up and one stroke down to form each letter. It seemed very easy but my letters looked lopsided. I kept working on it and ruined many envelopes but for some reason, it was just not clicking. I decided to stop practicing and leave it alone. It was just an extra skill anyway so, no harm done.

Much later, I was really bored on a rainy Saturday with nothing to do. I figured “hey, maybe I’ll give calligraphy another shot”. I busted out more paper from the printer and my favorite Tombow Fudenosuke pens to get to work. I kept practicing the upstrokes and downstrokes but now, I was thinking less and feeling more. My hands started to move gracefully across the page with beautiful lettering left behind. My block had been mental and now finally, I could write in calligraphy. I have many experiences like this and they have all shaped me to realize that I want to become the most beautiful version of myself, like calligraphy is compared to regular writing.

At Penn State, I will strive to become more polished and refined. College will not be my final draft, rather it will consist of more editing. I know that I love science but now is the time for me to refine my interests. I can put my up and down strokes together to form letters. I look forward to taking advantage of the unique classes PSU has such as Science, Ethics, Policy, and Law, or Biology of Aging. These will create words.

I can intern at the Fox Chase Cancer Center to understand the ins and outs of a career in medicine and to interact with patients. I can be responsible for others besides myself in a different light and learn from other healthcare professionals. These experiences will help me form elegant sentences.

I will learn to make time for other things besides schoolwork to make my letters varied. I will be cheering in the stands on Football Saturdays, decked out in white for the white-out game. I can spend time with friends outside of Berkey Creamery in between classes. I can have dinner with my roommate on the other side of Pollock Road. I aim to have a holistic experience at Penn State and focus on more than just academics because I am more than my grades.  

My experiences at PSU will make me refined just like the sophisticated letters on my graduation invitations. I can picture it now: PSU in huge writing. The only question is, blue or white?

What the Essay Did Well

This essay is brilliantly written like a “ Why This College ” essay, where the writer shares specific information about activities they would get involved in if they were a student at Penn State University. Sharing details specific to Penn State University, such as “Berkey Creamery” and “Pollock Road,” shows that the student has done their research about the school and is excited about the possibility of attending. The writer also shares a variety of things about the school that they like. They share potential classes, internships, and events they’d participate in as a student. All of this helps the admissions committee see the writer as a student at Penn State University–which, as a hopeful student, is a great thing!

The language at the beginning is beautiful and pulls the reader into the story. Imagery like “crumpled wads of paper sprinkled around my room” and “one stroke up and one stroke down” paint a picture for the reader that clearly shows what the writer is saying. It also helps highlight a student’s talent at writing. 

Finally, by referencing calligraphy throughout the essay, the writer connects the two parts of the prompt together, an activity they like and how they’re going to succeed at Penn State University. This creates great continuity and flow throughout the essay. When you write your essay, reflect on how all the pieces and answers to each part of the prompt (if there are multiple) work together to contribute to your overall message.

What Could Be Improved 

This essay has a lot of sentences that start in a similar manner. There’s a lot of “I can…”, “I will…”, or “I” followed by another verb. It’s important to vary your sentence structure so that the essay flows better and doesn’t sound repetitive. Instead of ”I can intern at the Fox Chase Cancer Center to understand the ins and outs of a career in medicine,” the writer could have said something like, “Interning at the Fox Chase Cancer Center would help me to understand the ins and outs of a career in medicine.” This isn’t a big change, but it will help improve the overall style of the essay. This is a common problem in a “ Why School? ” essay when students write about what they would do as a student at a particular college, so make sure to look out for it. 

While this essay does a great job overall of being specific, there are moments where the writer could have provided more details. For example, they wrote: “I have many experiences like this… ” It would have been better if the writer had briefly specified these experiences. They could have written: “This experience and others like learning photography and to play the piano have shaped me to realize that I want to become the most beautiful version of myself.” This would provide more information about the writer’s interests and life that the reader wouldn’t otherwise learn. 

The clock ticked 09:25 a.m., exactly an hour left for my exam. Unlike other exam days, I was nervous. Well, it was understandable, I had spent a whole 2 months in a hospital bed and another week or two recovering and flushing out the heavy doses of medicines out of my body. Dizziness was still there, however platelet count has only crossed the bare minimum mark. My attention span dropped drastically and I found it hard to focus for longer hours.

Only I knew how I managed to climb up the stairs to the 3rd floor and walk across the classroom in midst of all the concerning and questioning gazes of “Where Have You  Been?” 

I was just setting up my books and stationary, when my friend came up and asked for my help in some topic related to the exam. It was in no means new, we usually discussed after our lectures and cleared our doubts. I’ve always believed that peers understand our perspective better than teachers, because they are as new to the topic as myself.  

I spent another 20 minutes explaining and making her understand the concepts. It turned out 2 more classmates had the same doubts and we ended up revising the whole chapter, along with quick summaries of other chapters as well.

The bell rang and it was time for the exam. We followed the same ritual for the following exams. We were 9 classmates; discussing problems, giving explanations and finding solutions, and giving our 100% in exams. Unknowingly we formed this study group that continued the whole academic session and helped us in the best way possible.

I wonder if it was my instinct for feeling responsible and agreeing on helping out my classmates or I was grateful that she helped me in escaping the questions coming my way that day.

This experience didn’t only help me in accelerating my studies, but also as I listened and asked questions, I soon noticed a variety of viewpoints and approaches to the same idea and problem. This helped me in developing critical thinking skills and collaboration abilities. 

This is an excellent practice for when I’ve finished school and out where I will find myself in similar group dynamics.

This type of prompt is extremely open-ended: tell us something (anything!) that shows that you could succeed at Penn State. While you have the freedom to say whatever you want, it is imperative that you pick a focus for your essay and stick to it. You don’t want to confuse or overwhelm your reader by going in a million directions at once. 

This writer does an excellent job of keeping their essay cohesive and easy to follow by structuring everything around one particular experience they had doing some last-minute studying before a test. Through their discussion of this experience, we learn that:

• They are REFLECTIVE — With the line “I wonder if it was my instinct for feeling responsible and agreeing on helping out my classmates or I was grateful that she helped me in escaping the questions coming my way that day,” the student shows their capacity for mature reflection after an experience.
• They are CARING — The fact that this student did not hesitate to help other students (who are presumably competition) shows kindness and selflessness.
• They are INSIGHTFUL — The sentence “I’ve always believed that peers understand our perspective better than teachers, because they are as new to the topic as myself” shows that this student observes the world around them thoughtfully, and trusts their powers of observation, even when they lead them to somewhat unconventional realizations.
• They are A LEADER — As the student describes the events of the morning, they position their informal leadership role as extremely natural. They are not a leader because it will improve their resume or win them awards, but because they want to share their skills with others.
• They are OPEN-MINDED — The collaborative approach to learning they describe doesn’t work without open-mindedness. This student recognizes the importance of diverse viewpoints.

While this essay is focused, the student also cashes in on the prompt’s suggestion that they tell admissions officers something that can’t be found elsewhere in their application. For this student, it’s their medical struggles during high school. 

We finish this essay with a much clearer understanding of what traits define this student, which helps humanize them in our eyes and better envision them as a member of the Penn State community.

While this student successfully seizes the opportunity to enlighten admissions officers about the medical adversity they have faced, the connection between their first few paragraphs (about medical struggles) and their later paragraphs (about collaborative learning) could be established earlier and more clearly.

It is not until the sentence “I wonder if it was my instinct for feeling responsible and agreeing on helping out my classmates or I was grateful that she helped me in escaping the questions coming my way that day” that things start to come together. Here, readers have this moment where we think: “Oh, the impromptu tutoring session helped the student to avoid questions about their medical situation. I get it now.” If the student had teased this connection earlier, confusion would have been avoided.

For example, after “I was just setting up my books and stationary, when my friend came up and asked for my help in some topic related to the exam,” the student could add:

“‘She saved me,’ I thought to myself.”

Or, after the sentence “I spent another 20 minutes explaining and making her understand the concepts,” the student could add:

“It had been months since I had gone more than 20 minutes without worrying about my legs.”

Additionally, the words that are allocated to the last two paragraphs could be used more strategically. In college essays, you are always wrestling with limited words, so it is important to use the words you do have wisely (and memorably). 

The paragraphs beginning with “This experience didn’t only…” and “This is an excellent practice for…” fall into the unfortunate trap of telling rather than showing. At this point in the essay, we already understand that the student listens, is open-minded, and works well in collaborative group dynamics. 

Rather than reiterating what we already know, the student could have more effectively used those 65 words elsewhere in the essay. For example, they could have given us specific bits of dialogue from conversations they had with their peers, or expand on the specific feelings they have during a collaborative learning experience.

Want feedback on your Penn State essay before you submit? That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays. 

If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. One expert advisor on CollegeVine, Alexandra Johnson , provided commentary on the first essay in this post, to give you a sense of how useful expert advice can be. Advisors offer one-on-one guidance on everything from essays to test prep to financial aid. If you want help writing your essays or feedback on drafts, book a consultation with Alexandra Johnson or another skilled advisor to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

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How optional is the optional penn state essay

Crunch time. I could probably write like 2 paragraphs real quick but nothing special. Or I could just skip. My test scores are above 75th percentile and gpa is well above average.

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